World Cup 64 RP Thread

by **Qazox** » Sun Mar 24, 2013 7:59 pm

For over 150 years Qazox has been involved in the World Cup. But for the first time in quite a while the Eagles are not a threat to win the title nor are they likely to qualify. The team has no experience playing at this level and they have a difficult row to hoe. Returning Cassadaigua, perennial contenders Bergnovinaia and #4 ranked Polar Islandstates are in Qazox' group. And those also happen to be the Eagles' first 3 opponents. At best, Qazox will finish 11-3-4 and 4th in the group.

Schedule

by **Andossa Se Mitrin Vega** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 1:46 am

Atlantian Oceania is, as they say, The Place to Be. And nothing could speak better for that fact than World Cup 64 and its qualifying tournament. Enter the Sea Dragons and their Group 5 competition of which the top 4 seeds all hail form AO. Legalese, Carpathia and Ruthenia, and the Blouman Empire round out the list of favorites to be moving on. And with the cup itself being hosted by the combination of our northern AO allies in Wight and the Monk-loving Paladins of New Montreal States in Southern AO, things are set to shine once more for the most decorated region in all of NS sports.

In preparation for the World Cup the Sea Dragons have been away from home training in order to better be adapted to the different climates they will be faced to play matches in. VDF bases in Wight (Sa Tu’urk) and Falcania (Devil’s Bay) allowed the squad to prepare for whichever nation they would find themselves playing in during the World Cup proper, and the travel back and forth at week’s end prepared them for the grind that was the World Cup qualifiers. The added boon of a base in Wight itself and one so near to NMS would be helpful in those away fixtures on MD 5 (C&R) and MD 11 (Legalese). It is finally good to see the Sea Dragons taking every opportunity to gain an advantage rather than trusting their name alone would get them there.

Recent World Cups had taught them that, if nothing else. From a third CoH Championship, A third place WC finish and an exit in the WC group stage to unknown United Gordanopia had seen the Sea Dragons rise to a best-ever #2 ranking and then plummet to 17th. Anything could happen, but these Sea Dragons were not about to leave anything to chance. With no Monks to contend with during qualification this was the time to make a move back towards the top.

With only the rosters of Legalese and Blouman Empire available just yet, there is little to say about what we will face. I can assure you though that we see no realistic threats to our ability to qualify outright other than our aforementioned AO counterparts. With seeds 5 and 6 hailing from taggers-along Esportiva and the only Rushmore competition in the form of the world 150 ranked side from Kerblaekistan, and no one else ranked better than 246, Group 5 should be an all AO affair.

And, as a treat, we have this song that has become quite the rage around the training grounds since reserve midfielder Laken Kim'athu reportedly began singing it to calm her nerves…

On the first day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
A bobble-headed Di Bradini.

On the second day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
Two Bua dice,
And a bobble-headed Di Bradini.

On the third day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
Three Hawk pics,
Two Bua dice,
And a bobble-headed Di Bradini.

On the fourth day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
Four Jaffacakes,
Three Hawk pics,
Two Bua dice,
And a bobble-headed Di Bradini.

On the fifth day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
Five “Monks Gone Wild“,
Four Jaffacakes,
Three Hawk pics,
Two Bua dice,
And a bobble-headed Di Bradini.

On the sixth day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
Six Elf bikinis,
Five “Monks Gone Wild“ ,
Four Jaffacakes,
Three Hawk pics,
Two Bua dice,
And a bobble-headed Di Bradini.

On the seventh day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
Seven whores named Dallas,
Six Elf bikinis,
Five “Monks Gone Wild“,
Four Jaffacakes,
Three Hawk pics,
Two Bua dice,
And a bobble-headed Di Bradini.

On the eighth day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
Eight rubber chickens,
Seven whores named Dallas,
Six Elf bikinis,
Five “Monks Gone Wild“ ,
Four Jaffacakes,
Three Hawk pics,
Two Bua dice,
And a bobble-headed Di Bradini.

On the ninth day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
Nine blaring 'Urrs-horns' ,
Eight rubber chickens,
Seven whores named Dallas,
Six Elf bikinis,
Five “Monks Gone Wild“ ,
Four Jaffacakes,
Three Hawk pics,
Two Bua dice,
And a bobble-headed Di Bradini.

On the tenth day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
Ten Tegan T-shirts,
Nine blaring 'Urrs-horns' ,
Eight rubber chickens,
Seven whores named Dallas,
Six Elf bikinis,
Five “Monks Gone Wild“ ,
Four Jaffacakes,
Three Hawk pics,
Two Bua dice,
And a bobble-headed Di Bradini.

On the eleventh day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
Eleven Polar Cartoons,
Ten Tegan T-shirts,
Nine blaring 'Urrs-horns' ,
Eight rubber chickens,
Seven whores named Dallas,
Six Elf bikinis,
Five “Monks Gone Wild“,
Four Jaffacakes,
Three Hawk pics,
Two Bua dice,
And a bobble-headed Di Bradini.

On the twelfth day of World Cup,
my true love sent to me
Twelve Moose with Beards,
Eleven Polar cartoons ,
Ten Tegan T-shirts,
Nine blaring 'Urrs-horns' ,
Eight rubber chickens,
Seven whores named Dallas,
Six Elf bikinis,
Five “Monks Gone Wild“,
Four Jaffacakes,
Three Hawk pics,
Two Bua dice,
And a bobble-headed Di Bradini.

by **Khytenna** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 3:09 am

RNC:SPORTS

World Cup 64 Qualifers draws: News and analysis

Khytenna have been drawn in a group that has mix of nation either very highly ranked or very low ranked. Khytenna will count their blessings with teams like Swytland and Shining Armour, but will be weary og there main threats, the five time world champions Starblaydia and the legendary Kiryu-shi, both will prove difficult.

dispite the predicted ass kicking that the pundits are predicting, Coach James Davy remains optimistic

We have a lot of experienced players in the squad, we should be fearful of numbers, we all know the capability of the Starblaydian squad, and we know that any mistake we make they will hand it back to us, we may not have all the fancy titles yet, but we have passion and the Khytenna spirt, and i think we can pull an upset in this group, we have done giant killing before! we can do it again.

our group looks like this:

Group 7

Khytenna (73)
Mangolana(207)
Starblaydia(6)
Shining Armour (301)
Fulflood (214)
Boring Paradise(46)
Nova Cambria
Vettrera(119)
Swytlandre (114)
Kiryu-shi (22)

Khytenna first game will against Kiryu-shi

by **Ko-oren** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 3:38 am

It's time for one of these again... Group overview, 9.0

And in the ninth attempt of the Greenblues to seize the title, they have been drawn into Group 19. Experienced fans of the Ko-orenite National Team always make sure to first check the first group, then the last group, to minimize the time spent looking for the NT. It hasn't been the first time (nor the second) that the KNT has been drawn into the last group. But here is the group by seed:

The Archregimancy (8)
Michael VII (43)
Ko-oren (50)
Jedi8246 (71)
Timfen (90)
Secundus Kasius (117)
Bearded Moose (200)
Kericia (246)
Democratic States of Fenbar (313)
Silver Beach (UR)

First thing that catches the eye is the small gap between Ko-oren and the first seed above it (Michael VII). There is some sort of history of the NT complaining about the large gap and therefore not being able to beat them, but this time around, we surely have no objections. Could this be our year? On the other hand, Jedi8246 and Timfen are not too far below us. Could this be their year too? Or will Michael VII and The Archregimancy again do as they are expected and leave the rest of the group behind them, in other words, will it be their year? Or will Secundus Kasius upset all those above them, will it be their year? Or what about Bearded Moose, Kericia, Fenbar or Silver Beach? And we could go on like this for a while (no we couldn't, there's ten teams in the group and I've had all of them).

Here are the fixtures:

Jedi8246 - Ko-oren
Ko-oren - The Archregimancy
DSoFenbar - Ko-oren
Ko-oren - Secundus Kasius
Bearded Moose - Ko-oren
Ko-oren - Timfen
Kericia - Ko-oren
Ko-oren - Michael VII
Silver Beach - Ko-oren
[same thing, but reversed home/away]

The four teams that the Greenblues need to look out for, namely the Archregimancy, Michael VII, Timfen and Jedi8246 are pretty separated throughout the list, but we will face Jedi8246 and the Archregimancy right away, in consecutive matches. As they say, a good beginning makes a good ending, a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, a good beginning is half the battle, the early bird catches the worm, and the one we always forget about, don't count your chickens before they hatch. Another one is 'fish begins to stink at the head', and we could be sure this one refers to the first two games of this cycle. It's actual meaning about bad leadership ruining the whole thing, could also be applicable, because there is always a head coach to blame if things go bad.

by **Kandorith** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 4:58 am

Xiangzhóu News:SPORTS

Kandorith preparing for the road to the World Cup

After extended training and finding the perfect players, Kandorith has prepared itself to make it's mark on the qualifiers once again. Around a special holiday season, devoted to the Kento religion, the Red Dragons will have to prove themselves on the field. After analysing the group, head coach Xíanjí Hatema already issued some concern, but doesn't expect any major obstacles. "With determination, discipline and the current training program we can overcome any bump in the road towards the tournament." according to Xíanjí.

The World Cup qualifiers are around the most important holiday season of the nation; Spring Week, which celebrates the arrival of the warmer weather and the more kind gods and spirits. As the summer spirits start appearing, the people are becoming more optimistic towards life, earnings and of course; sports. the two coaches of the team also expressed their joy in playing around this time, as Kento plays a large part in sports around Kandorith, even in these modern times.

With full expectation we will be following the national team in Wight and the New Montreal States, the latest scores, information and of course interviews with the players.

We asked the head coach Xíanjí Hatema for his thoughts on the upcoming world cup;

"The aim is the finals, naturally, but we have to look realistically. We are not a hot shot team and we have yet to leave our mark on international football as it is an upcoming sport in our nation. We are aiming for qualification and I am sure we can get to trough this stage if we can get our teamwork flawlessly right and if we are able to trust each other like we did during training sessions. The boys should not see this is some extraordinary task, but rather like their football matches in the domestic league; where they shine as both individuals and great team players. I have great faith in this team and especially great faith in our ability to strike and lash out at goal.
I have set the goals, I have trained the team to my full knowledge and even helped them prepare mentally. The only thing which remains to do now, is them performing at one hundred percent, all the time. We know that we have a reputation of being Kandorith's finest, now we have to show and prove we are the finest. Also I already want to thank the supporters in advance and all their support on the road towards the qualifiers, we now need even more support to get trough the qualifying matches. The goal is qualifying, or goal is to put them under pressure and our goal is to outplay our opponents. If they score a goal, we score two. Losing is not an option. We have a point to make."

Strong words from coach Xíanjí and a hopeful prospect for the qualifiers.

While awaiting the upcoming match we can only say "Jiayoú Kanduó" As a good luck cheer for our team and we can't wait to see the stadiums to be decorated with our national colours, by our cheering fans. The Kandorese team knows what we expect from them and we know what we can expect from them, the finest players of our domestic league; ready to shine for national pride and international glory, a spot in the World Cup, at least.

by **Jeruselem** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 5:05 am

Princess Katy and Jeruselem coach Michelle Salad ...

Katy: Fruity, I see you have some hair.
Michelle: Yes, you know what chemo does to your hair.
Katy: Oh, I thought that you pulling your hair out.
Michelle: Well, I have teenage kids you know.
Katy: So does my sister.
Michelle: Dunno how you Dallas girls manage your kids

Katy: I don't have kids
Michelle: Who's the little one you are babysitting then
Katy: Oh her, that's not mine.
Michelle: It's not little Amy then.
Katy: No, that's little Cassie.
Michelle: Who's the mother?

Katy: One of the Sallad girls.
Michelle: She's not a Princess then
Katy: No, not yet anyway
Michelle: I was wondering
Katy: And the little boy isn't mine either
Michelle: I was wondering too.

Katy: Let's look at our group!

Northern Sunrise Islands
Kinzar
Rikatan
Yelvoldia
Yesopalitha
Sicoutimont
Basque Socialist States
New Sideburn
Maklohi Vai

Michelle: Only one I know about is Yesopalitha
Katy: Others don't ring any bells
Michelle: I guess it's time to google them
Katy: I guess so, no bloody idea about that lot
Michelle: I guess we should be OK then
Katy: I don't want a repeat of world Cup 63

Michelle: Yesopalitha are our biggest rival I guess
Katy: I expect to quality
Michelle: I'm sure you do
Katy: And better
Michelle: One thing at a time Princess
Katy: Yeah?

by **Jeru FC** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 5:13 am

Melody Pond and Melody Dallas examining their world cup opponents

New West Guiana
Secuelas
Free South Califas
Mesoland
Jeru FC
Milchama
Sprool
Schmiegelland
Euskirribakondara

Pond: Them Warriors from Milchama.
Dallas: Ah yes, always around. They made the final once I think.
Pond: Doesn't maggie love them?
Dallas: Dunno, but she certainly doesn't like us either
Pond: I've heard of Free South Califas
Dallas: Yeah, heard about them somewhere. Dunno when.

Pond: And the rest have funny names.
Dallas: Euskirribakondara ... what a name
Pond: Sprool is easier to spell
Dallas: A sprool of cotton?
Pond: I think we've met Mesoland somewhere
Dallas: And the others, no idea.

Pond: I guess people expect us to qualify
Dallas: So do I
Pond: No pressure then.
Dallas: None
Pond: That's code for we must qualify
Dallas: Yep

Pond: I think these girls are getting a bit old
Dallas: I guess so but we haven't got any replacements
Pond: Yes, I hope they have enough in the tank
Dallas: We don't need another CoH to kill them
Pond: Oh yes, that too.
Dallas: I want my holidays too.

Pond: How come no one wants to be my assistant
Dallas: Maybe getting paid helps
Pond: It would
Dallas: The budget is a bit lean
Pond: I know
Dallas: I mean, we can't even get decent beer this year.

by **Western cuba** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 10:13 am

Las Palabras de Libertad

World Cup 64 Group 9 Preview

Javier Andino

One word can describe my emotions about Western Cuba being placed in Group 9, excitement. Never before have I been so hopeful about us qualifying for the finals. Even without Edgardo Mendoza, or the rest of the Cubano dominated team, I have now placed my full confidence on our almost entirely Russano team. They proved they could work together well with Tito Moreno in the Copa Rushmori, and the arrow is pointing up for the qualification stage. Especially with what seems a reasonable group to be placed in. Mytannion and the up and coming Apox team top the top two seeds for the group, and Western Cuba has the great possibility of sneaking into the final qualifying spot in the group. (And perhaps even win the group entirely).

Mytannion along with Milchama are currently the two weakest teams in the top twenty, while Apox is in the lower group for the second pot. The same can be said for Western Cuba, but this is based from the last world cup team. Unless you been in a hole the last few months, barely any of these players are still even in the country. Edgardo Mendoza is spending the rest of his career with Scott City while many players have fled to several countries being labeled as refugees. The situation has been so desperate many have been in talks with signing with several Equestrian States clubs, the country which prevented Western Cuba from qualifying for the world cup. That shows you how dire the situation was, switching over to one of your biggest rivals due to political problems. Its a sad situation, many of those players had really promising careers. Ricardo Calderon and Tom Dawson seemed to be one of the brightest, and now I don't even know where the heck those guys are. Everyday for me I dream that this war would just end, but its just a foolish wish. We haven't even through the hardest times yet, which is scary to think.

But we can use this world cup to serve as a beacon for what just may be. Let us take a look at each top three teams from Group Nine, and rank them.

Group 9 Top Three Teams

Mytannion: The Mytannions won't dominate the group, like many teams from Pot 1 tend to do. The Mytannions haven't released their roster yet for qualifying, but if it stays the same from the last world cup, it can prove to be quite deadly. The most difficult will be the players that play professionally in the Polar Islandstates. Laze v Tuhinju comes to mind along with Demy de Zooijt. The Russano defense will have to find a way to contain Laze (if he even plays) along with Moreno finding a way to score against the talented Zooijt. This team can very much be upset, don't be surprised if Apox or Western Cuba manages to steal a victory. This team should be safe though and safely qualify for the world cup with first place. The only thing i'm disappointed about is that Western Cuba no longer has Armando Santos on the pitch. The man played in Mytannion, so he could of been useful to the team in that aspect.

Western Cuba: Apox can whine all they want, I think Western Cuba will qualify in front of them. Whether Western Cuba will be one of the top three second place teams is to be discovered, but this team can very easily finish in second in the group. I view Apox as a decent and up and coming team, but the competition that most of their national team faces seems to be lacking. Most of the team plays in Apox's own domestic league, which isn't top tier. Western Cuba could be criticized with the fact that Tito Moreno is the only player actually playing for a club, but we can only imagine what the government does to those players at the academies. This government seems to be stern on turning Western Cuba into a soccer super power just like the Russano government did with the baseball team. If Western Cuba continues the success they experienced at the Copa Rushmori, then they should finish in second without a problem. Tito Moreno needs to stay in form throughout the tournament however, if he plays every game like he does at Pays de Croix, this team could seriously make a run at first in the group.

Apox: Now here is where I believe Apox will finish in the tournament, and I'm almost certain they will. I can't see this team making any more forward progress with the majority of its players participating in the country's domestic league. In order to expand any further, those players must expand to outside the league. If they don't, Apox will not go below the sub-40 ranking and will find themselves towering back up the rankings once whoever does these rankings finds out how vastly over-rated the Apox national team is. Ricardo Calderon played with the Dwile Warriors for a few seasons, which most of the Apox national team plays on. I've seen footage of Calderon playing with the Warriors, it was by no means mind blowing. And this Apox team isn't either.

by **Boring Paradise** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 12:21 pm

Group 7

Khytenna (#73)
Mangolana (#207)
Starblaydia (#6)
Shining Armour (#310)
Fulflood (#214)
Boring Paradise (#46)
Nova Cambria (#UR)
Vettrera (#119)
Swytlandre (#114)
Kiryu-shi (#22)

MD1: 1-0 Fulflood (Away)
MD2: Kiryu-shi (Away)
MD3: Nova Cambria (Home)
MD4: Vettrera (Away)
MD5: Swytlandre (Home)
MD6: Khytenna (Away)
MD7: Mangolana (Home)
MD8: Starblaydia (Away)
MD9: Shining Armour (Home)

World Cup Draw|Guess Who Is Back?

It it me from the Last World Cup. This I am all alone with no help from my friends this time round. We all hope we can get through again to second place and then the playoffs. This time if we go through. I will be visiting two old nations from WC63. New Montreal States and Wight are hosts of the World Cup. So Hopes up we will beat them. Before the squad was announced I had been given the chance to go with the Team around the places. So I will be keeping the details on my blog which I made over the last Year. All of the gossip and news about the team will come here for the next month. Previously we could not get to the Aguazul Hotels. As they were off limits. So we could not talk in the cold because we were not there. So we went back to
the old TV Screen and watched from there. It was much worse than the real thing. I hope you agree with me?

Okay when I went to the draw as the replacement for Boring Paradise, because the real person was Gary Hughes but he had troubling times with his family. So I went ahead myself and watched it come past. We were the 2nd best team in Pot 3. Then after that I had a surprising feeling this World Cup will be entertaining for Boring Paradise, Starblaydia, Kiryu-shi and then fourth best team in the group, Khytenna. This is bit frightening. There is a difference from last year.

1st: Starblaydia (#6, 36.51), New Montreal States (#18, 29.71) Worse
2nd: Kiryu-shi ('#22, 28.33), Wight (#22, 24.30)               Worse
3rd: Khytenna (#73, 11.41), Octinstine (#57, 13.48)            Better
4th: Swytlandre (#114, 6.69), Slembana (#91, 8.95)             Better
5th: Vettrera (#119, 5.88), Cowardly Pacifists (#133, 4.39)    Worse
6th: Mangolana (#207, 1.63), Secundus Kasius (#176, 2.25)      Better
7th: Fulflood (#214, 1.44), Free Swiss States (#245, 1.14)     Worse
8th: Shining Armour (#310, 0.56), Amelio (#349, 0.13)          Worse
9th: Nova Cambria (#UR), Nation M (#UR)                        Same

Overall this group is worse for Boring Paradise than the last one. To make it even worse. we got the schedule for the matches. First Match is against Starblaydia at there place. So it is the bad start for us. Then for MD18 Boring Paradise are against Mangolana and their stadium. What a goo draw for us.

Luke Homewood, Out.

by **Pzetrovlaskia** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 12:30 pm

[b]Finally, after countless defeats, it is our time to shine![b]

Pzetrovlaskia are entering their first World Cup!

At every international break in Zuropean Leagues, Eduard Khil will gather the finest players in Pzetrovlaskia, to face heated opposition in group 14, such as Chunnan and Kandorith.

Hopefully, qualification to play in New Montreal will be in order, and so will glory for Pzetrovlaskia!!

by **The Sova Empire** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 1:50 pm

The Sova Empire Schedule:

After the 3rd place finish in the Baptism of Fire group 1, TSE is ranked 152nd. They have been drawn 8th in group 8. Their schedule is as follows:

TSE will be traveling a lot, with only 1 home stand, and that is only for 2 games. The biggest threat in this group is Taeshan, with Karditan as the 2nd highest ranked team. Expect those 2 to dominate, and hope that TSE finishes higher than last.

The first game is against Egpty. The misspelling of the nation title is kinda funny, but the roster-less 176th ranked team is going to be almost a tune-up match. This game should be relatively close, considering TSE's -5 style modifier. The starting roster for that game:

Look to see MB score 2-3 goals, and also watch the placing of brother and sister TO and KO together, that might help the defense. Should be a good match.

by **Mycellena** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 1:58 pm

Focus On: Jeremiah Drake- Goalkeeper

[Several Months Ago]

Defeat. It was an ugly word. The word was especially ugly for Jeremiah Drake, goalkeeper for the Mycellena Thunderhawks.

After Mycellena's final game in the Baptism of Fire, Drake didn't fly back with the rest of the team. Instead he returned to the hotel room where the team had been staying. Collapsing on the bed, Drake stared for the longest time at the ceiling. What could he have done differently? Which of those shots that he had missed could have been stopped? What information had he been lacking to make Mycellena's victory possible? What more could he have done? The ceiling fan spinning softly above him offered no answers, but Drake continued to stare at it regardless.

Even the best of teams lost occasionally, it was a fact of the sport. Even the most talented of players couldn't stop every shot. That didn't mean that Drake needed to like it. Slowly, Drakes eyes began to close, lulled into an uneasy sleep underneath the dull noise of the fan above.

After several hours of tossing and turning, Drake was awakened by the ringing of his phone. Grumbling about how 1am was no time for a proper phone call, Drake dug through his pockets until finally finding his phone. "This is Jeremiah Drake-" he began.

"Yes, I know its Jeremiah Drake! Why else would I be calling this number, you dumbass?" The booming voice of Coach Cohan came from the other end of the line. "Listen, I know that you're mighty pissed about getting knocked out of the tournament so early and that you're busy moping over your mistakes." Drake only got out a single syllable in protest before Cohan steamrolled over any excuses he might have made. "I don't wanna hear about it. You're the goddamned Vice-Captain of this goddamn team and you'd better learn to act like it. You're also the best goddamned goalkeeper we've got, so you'd better not be thinking of quitting on us either." Praise from Coach Cohan, even delivered through a string of insults, was so rare that Drake was at a loss for words for several more seconds. "The Baptism is a walk in the park compared to the World Cup though, and if you think we can even get past the first game without training up a bit, then you have another thing coming. In case you need for me to drill this even farther into your goddamned head, here it is: Get Your Ass Back To Mycellena Pronto. You got that?"

Drake's answer was short and to the point. "Coach, all due respect, but there's something I need to do first. I can't come back yet. Tell the team to continue without me, I'm sure Kardell has everything under control anyway. Don't worry, I'm not quitting. I'll be back in time for the World Cup."

Cohan's angry shriek of curses made Drake hold the phone a full arm's length away from his ear. "Something you need to DO?" Demanded an angry Cohan. "What you need to DO is get your ass back to Mycellena before I hire a squad of thugs to kidnap you and bring you back by goddamned force." Cohan's deep breath was loud even to be heard on the other line. "Look, you may have okay-ed this little excursion of yours with Nathaniel, but if I don't see you back in Mycellena after 2 weeks I'm throwing you off the goddamned team."

Drake smiled, threats of dismissal, that was the Coach he knew so well. "Two weeks should be plenty, thank you" Drake replied simply.

"They'd better be" said Cohan. "And you'd better come back stronger from them. If I find out you've been spending your two weeks shacking up with some prostitute-" Drake hung up before Cohan could deliver another death threat. He smiled then, for the first time since Mycellena's loss. He'd make Mycellena stronger from this. It may take some time, but those teams in the World Cup would have another thing coming if they thought to underestimate Mycellena.

[Present Day]

Drake was jolted awake by turbulence. The airplane he was on was decently crowded, but he had been lucky enough to secure an isle to himself. Papers of all kinds were scattered around his feet, having fallen likely at some point in the flight. Drake picked up a handful of them, each individually filled with numbers and names of various soccer players and glanced through making sure none of them had gone missing. One of the stewardesses noticed Drake's movements with some degree of amusement, picking up one of the fallen papers she handed it to him. "What are these all?" The stewardess inquired. "Some kind of business data?"

Drake grinned widely, "It's data alright, but not the kind that you're thinking of." Taking the paper from the stewardess, Drake glanced briefly at the list of soccer players it contained. Everything from number of shots on goal to number of games missed were there. "This data is going to win Mycellena a soccer tournament." Not knowing what else to say, the stewardess decided that the passenger two rows down looked like he needed a snack and went to ask him if he wanted anything to eat.

His papers recollected, Drake allowed himself a brief moment of satisfaction. Yes, the data didn't look promising. There were several other teams in group 12 alone that could likely best anything Mycellena had to offer. Still, he would do everything in his power to make certain that at the very least Mycellena's first World Cup would be a memorable one for everyone involved.

Defeat. The word lost some of its ugliness when one imaged that it applied to another team.

by **Audioslavia** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 3:11 pm

"...that the FFA has bowed to Kjeligstedi oil money proves that, despite their vociferous and aggressive defence of the amateur status of Audioslavia's domestic football league - a stance that has forced every single member of the current national team to look for pro-football on distant shores - the FFA are running themselves like a for-profit business, and that can't be good for supporters of the national team"

Jeremy re-read the last paragraph of Sue Dysos' article before tossing the newspaper aside and picking up his coffee - latte, extra foam, twist of lemon, sugar, cinammon, umbrella - and taking a thoughtful sip. Sue had never been the type to mince her words, especially where journalism was concerned, and that article had been no exception.

The rebuilding of Audioslavia's main football stadiums - the SNA in Ceilerden and the Silver Jubilee Stadium in Cathair being the most noteable, having hosted the World Cup 7 and World Cup 25 finals respectively - was almost complete, and with the two 80,000-seater stadiums back in play, the vote on whether to move Audioslavia's home games away from the 1927 Stadium in Iadub had been taken at the offices of the Football Federation of Audioslavia. Either one of the old, renovated stadiums versus the small 25,000 seater ground on the shores of Kjeligsted isle - technically outwith Audioslavia's borders, and therefore the only national stadium in the world that wasn't actually *in* the country of the team that played there.

The FFA had voted, 10-1-1 in favour of the smaller, 'foreign' stadium. Nobody outside of the association could quite believe it. Nobody, that is, but for the tanned and be-suited men of the oil-rich island of Kjeligsted, be-suited men who had been rumoured to have promised 'untold riches' to the FFA in return for keeping the Audioslavia national side - and the FFA headquarters - on Kjeligsted isle.

Audioslavians were not happy. The round trip from the main population centres - Ferramendiak, Ceilerden, Riddern and the capital Cathair - was prohibitive for Friday night and Tuesday night games, and while the 1927 stadium was rather fetching to look at, a 25,000 seater ground was hardly fitting for a side pretending to be the best in the world.

Jeremy Jaffacake finished his coffee and wondered at how quickly the anti-Kjeligsted, anti-FFA sentiment would have taken hold of the Audioslavian public had the news not been brutally and unceremoniously buried that afternoon.

The draw for the World Cup 64 qualifiers. Audioslavia's name drawn out of the hat, top seeds in group 2. Kinitaria joined them as second seeds, before the nation held its breath to see which of the third-seeds would be put into Audioslavia's group. The Wightling FA suit had fiddled with the plastic ball, cracked it open, pulled out the piece of paper, looked at it, smirked, and held it towards the audience. It read, simply, Krytenia.

The age-old rivalry was about to get two new instalments, and oh how Jeremy wished he could be a fly on the wall of a certain appartment in Cathair right now.

---

Sue Dysos took a sip of her coffee - strong, black, bitter - and kept her eyes on the television. A Wightling suit, a ball, a piece of paper. "Krytenia". A cascade of hot, black coffee spluttered forth from her mouth. Beside her, her husband Rubio Sanchez lowered his head into his hands.

The Krytenian man looked over at his Audioslavian wife through the corner of his eye. He saw a look of disbelief give way to an evil grin. Sue turned to meet his gaze.

In front of them, a ten year-old boy turned round and looked at his parents.

"Who should I want to win?" enquired Guillermo Sanchez-Dysos.

He received two conflicting answers. In the background, the mewing cry of an upset two year-old interrupted the argument the parents were about to have.

"Your turn to see to Jeremias" said Sue.

by **Polar Islandstates** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 3:37 pm

Morten Rasmussen was sitting patiently on a bench outside an anonymous office in the basement of the Ensign Tower, Franz Josef. Apparently, this was a traditional part of any new manager's reign at the helm of the Terns, though he suspected it was generally held in the FPIFA, or the President's official lodgings at the very least. But, no. Not this time. Turning up promptly at the location specified on the invitation, several undersecretaries had directed him past down several security checks and into the lower level basements of the Ensign Tower. He didn't even know it had basements this deep, and yet here he was, sitting on a bench and waiting for the President to be finished with her current engagement. Whatever that was. And it had sure been taking a long time whatever it was, Rasmussen had been listening to muttered phrases and snatches of conversation for the best part of an hour now, and he was well overdue for the start of his meeting.

"Erm, excuse me," he asked of an aide that was walking down the corridor with an armful of files, "you could just tell the President that I can come back another time, I'm not particularly busy these next few days."

"I will pass the message on, Mr Rasmussen, but if you'd just be patient until then..." said the aide hurriedly, disappearing into the room in a flurry of filing.

"Oh, er, okay. Thank you." said Morten to the empty corridor.

He continued to sit in silence, empty drones occasionally wafting through the door just low enough so Morten couldn't make out what they were saying apart from the odd sentence. Despite himself, he was nervous. Try through he had to tell himself he was calm and in control, and despite the three Divisjon One titles he'd won at Axel Heiburg, and all the experience of pressure and how to work with it that those league seasons had brought to him, he was trembling on the inside and doing his hardest not to let it show on the outside. It wasn't everyday you were called upon by your nation to make the decisions for the Terns, and all of a sudden when he knew that the eyes of every football fan in the country would be watching him, that mattered.

"...a great deal of security and growth in the future. We must act now to secure the area and being construction befo-..."

More phrases caught in the air moving along the corridor. Whatever was going on in there, it sounded important. He looked around at the whitewash walls and polished linoleum floor, stray filing cabinets and surplus electronic hardware cluttering the stark perpendicular chambers every here and there. Surely the actions in there deserved more elaborate and grand surroundings? If these were the corridors of power, then they weren't all that impressive.

Morten wondered to himself whether the President had met either of his predecessors in a location quite as unnervingly boring as this fifth level basement, presumably well, well below the level of the adjacent Elfsteijn channel.

"...is that the amount of funds currently promised to the projects are simply not enough for what is required. If we want to truly dominate, then it is absolute necessary for you to pledge enou-..." continued a different voice from before inside the room.

Presumably both were in nicer offices, he thought, carpentry and pine details everywhere, or flashy steel and glass constructions perhaps. Sol Kirkkegaard had formally taken the helm a long time after he'd been 'in the job', as it were, organising the original two trial teams, so here would have been plenty of time in which to organise a flashy do with sports journalists and things like that.

"...increase funding to the project and it will not be a failure. This move will ring-fence certain aspects of our futures forev-..."

And then Joachim Schwartz had taken the reins after a period of being caretaker manager during the Copa, so there was presumably a lot of time to prepare for that meeting as well. Not that Morten's appointment had been all that drastic either, of course, with him insisting on seeing out one last trophy-winning season with FC Axel Heiburg first. Nonetheless, apparently now that he was in charge of the team the timing was somewhat off from where the President was standing, and so his diary yielded to hers and he was just here waiting to speak with her on a cold plastic bench outside a discussion room of some sort as a result. It could have been a more comfortable start to the formal side of the job, he wasn't going to lie.

"...so I implore you, Madame President, please do not pass this without first looking at our recommendations. The ramifications could be catastrophic if we allow these events to go unchecked. One shudders to think of th-..."

The door opened a crack, and he heard a little more than he had done of the conversations going on inside. The aide from before popped his head around the corner and fixed Morten with an uninterested gaze.

"Excuse me, she'll be right out."

And then before Morten could open his mouth to answer with so much as a 'thank you', the aide had snapped the door shut again. Morten sighed. Well, the people at the FPIFA were more polite than that, thankfully. Then again, by the sounds of the discussion inside it was possible they'd been up all night, so, perhaps he should cut them a little slack.

"...just make sure you're ready with your reports on tackling any aggression, General. Okay? Right. Thank you ladies and gentlemen, that will be all, and thank you."

The door opened. A stream of people started walking out. Morten stood up, anticipating the President coming out soon, and ended up sitting down again as the flow of men and women in blue, grey and black business suits showed no signs of slowing down. There had been a whole lot more in there than he'd thought. He looked at their faces and saw fresh wrinkles, added only recently by the looks of it. Some of them were smiling, some of them weren't, some of them it wasn't that easy to tell which way their emotions were going. Morten suddenly realised that this would be half of his job now. He was manager of the Polar Islandstates national football team, and like it or not, that meant politics. Watching his facial expressions and growing a few more crows feet was going to be a part of his life from here on in.

He recognised a few of the last to leave the room, smiling broadly and wearing very expensive suits indeed, he had half a mind that he'd seen them on the business shows and the investment booklets sent round to those like him who had the Sols to invest in wise places. Certainly, their swagger appeared to suggest a certain business persuasion, rather than the polite and hurried scuttling motion that Federation politicians always seemed to acquire over time.

There was a cough behind him, and he stood up quickly. Just as he'd been thinking about the curious way politicians appeared to move around in the Federation, the President of it had displayed the authoritative glide she was so known for and had appeared behind him without so much as a sound.

"Ah, erm, Madame President." Morten stammered, holding out his hand to shake her hand.

"Mr Rasmussen, I presume." she answered warmly but efficiently. Morten opened his mouth to respond but was cut off before he could do so. "Can you walk and talk?"

Morten nodded.

"Good, good," she continued, "listen, I haven't got much time as I've got to head to the airport couple of hours, but this isn't anything more than a formality anyway so, not to worry. Basically, welcome to the job, don't embarrass your country, and don't embarrass me. Okay?"

"Erm, okay." agreed Morten, focusing rather more on keeping up with her brisk pace through the corridors so unfamiliar to him than on saying anything particularly impressive. "So, how closely do you work wi-..."

"Oh, not that closely really," interrupted the President again, reading his mind, "obviously if you need any help with the media side of things and any political things then you're welcome to contact my office, but I let well enough alone, basically. The FPIFA can handle just about anything, now. And, anyway, I'll be pretty busy being the President."

"Well, quite." Morten agreed, wanting to appear keen.

"So, this is where I leave you." said the President, coming to a halt abruptly.

"Err, here?" asked Morten, looking around. They'd been walking pretty briskly for a reasonable amount of time, so logic dictated that they must have moved from one place to another, and yet, looking around their current location he wasn't able to pick out any significant differences in his immediate environment.

"Take the second left, first right and you'll be at the lifts." said President Iversen-Eklund, sensing his confusion, "You want the ground floor lobby."

"Oh, thank you." he replied.

"Good luck, Mr Rasmussen," she said, holding out her hand to shake his tightly, "I'll be watching with interest. Til we meet again!"

"Erm, bye!" Morten called after her as she walked away.

He puffed out his cheeks. This was a situation he was not all that comfortable in, and he was glad to be leaving it. The qualifying groups would be drawn later that evening however, and that appealed to him much more. From politics back to football, he thought as he pressed the button on the lift panel. Just as he liked it.

by **Shadowbourne** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 3:59 pm

Khairi Dotzer sat restlessly at the end of the bench. He flipped aimlessly through the Sunday paper. To a casual passerby, he would have looked just like an ordinary citizen; that, of course, was the aim of his sitting on a park bench reading the paper. Ordinarily, Dotzer would not partake in such recreational affairs. He was a man on a mission; he had places to go and things to do. Dotzer was a investigator for the National Football Committee of Shadowbourne. He had entered the force almost twenty years prior with his good friend and business partner Alexey Fondey. Alexey, of course, had disappeared under mysterious circumstances just a few days ago. That was why Dotzer was here. Fondey had been sent to sent to Gzbfernigambia to investigate a potential gambling ring. He had left two weeks prior had had been due back several days ago.

He never returned.

As Dotzer tapped his foot impatiently, he felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked.

"Mr. Dotzer?" asked a middle-aged man in an expensive-looking suit.
"Yes."
"I have been sent here to help you find Mr. Fondey."

Dotzer rose wordlessly from his seat. The men began walking silently.

"This one's mine." the man said, as they approached a dark car with tinted windows.

As Dotzer bent down to open the door, he felt the unmistakable jab of a gun into his back. "Now get in the @#$%ing car and keep your mouth shut."

by **Gaveo** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 4:43 pm

The Gaveoan Times

And so it begins.

Flag of Gaveo.

By: Beni Cortez

The groups have been decided, the players selected and the team sent. Here we go World Cup 64 qualifications, this time Don Juan Villaroel is expected to do something amazing as the Gaveoan team is headed for a tough group. We face teams that are high up in the WC rankings and the team will have to preform as well as they can in order to have a chance to qualify. Here is our group.

Group 16

Catholican Catholica
Gaveo
Phalnia
Qazox
Bergnovinaia
Cassadaigua
Polar Islandstates
Charruterra
Leorudo
Advenia

Group 16 and boy do we have a lot of work to do, we face teams like Qazox, Bernovinaia, Cassadaigua, Polar Islandstates, and Leorudo. All these mentioned teams will give us a huge challenge and the team will have to adjust in order to win games. Our line up includes star strikers Sebastian Cadiz, Cesar Milano and Santiago Rojas. Coach Villaroel has said that Gaveo's traditional attack first style might give us an edge over some teams but he has admitted that if we attack to much our players will tire opening up opportunities for defensive minded teams to strike. We expect the best from our boys and hope for victory but we have a tough road ahead of us and we are just beginning our journey, support the boys at every match and as always go Gaveo.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A Player's Journey

Cadiz, Gaveo
March 11th, 2028
Sebastian's Residence

Sebastian Cadiz was at his peak in his career in football, he scored countless goals for Cadiz F.C and won them many championships. He just woke up and read the Gaveoan Times and despite he being a world class player he just found out who he plays against with and was rather worried. Gaveo vs Polar Islandstates, here in Gaveo, he knew that the team representing Polar Islandstates was a elite group of players, there wasn't just one star player, all of the players were stars in their own right. He sighed and got himself some Chili from last night, he ate them, then called Don Juan Villaroel, coach for the Gaveoan National Team. Sebastian waited for a response, finally his coach responded. "Hello?" Sebastian smiled and responded, "Hello coach! Hey did you see the for schedule the WC qualifications?" He heard nothing, then Sebastian heard a sigh. "Yeah, I did. Looks like we have a tough road ahead of us." said Villaroel. Sebastian frowned, "Why aren't you excited?" He then hears a laugh from the coach, "Well, this means I have to stay up late! I kid, it's all worth it and I like a challenge." Sebastian smiles again from hearing that and asks him a question. "Hey, when is practice?" Villaroel quickly responded. "Estadio Nacional in Chano. 4:00 PM EGT." Sebastian looked at the clock 9:39 AM. "I'll be there at 2. Seeya coach." Villaroel said bye and hanged up.

He got up from chair and took a shower, he said goodbye to his wife and headed for his private runway. It was 10:01 AM when he got to his plane. He was excited, the first match was two weeks away and he wanted to show Gaveo he still has the magic. Sebastian's journey to WC 64 begins with the flight to Chano...

by **Sicoutimont** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 4:46 pm

Royales Win Inagural Des Monts Ila Vai Cup

Sicoutimont and Maklohi Vai. Rushmore and Atlantian Ocean. Well, after a new agreement by both FA's, these teams will meet just before each World Cup for 2 games as a friendly challenge cup. This will be called the Des Monts Ila Vai Cup, the name proposed by the Vaian side. The tournament format will be: 2 games will be played, 1 in Sicoutimont, and 1 in Maklohi Vai. The winner will be determined by 3 criteria: win both matches, goal differential, and away goals. Many of the other tournament details are still being ironed out, but that didn't stop the first competition between these two teams taking place! The first game was played in Maklohi Vai, and was attended by the heads of both FA's. "This is a great opportunity to further the progress of our national team, by opening a friendly challenge between these two nations, Sicoutimont and Maklohi Vai." said Rene Rochefort, Director of the Sicoutian Football Association. It was a warm day in Maklohi Vai, and the action began! Sicoutimont played the full World Cup roster, starting Pier-Luc Dion in net. Girard Giroux started with the captain's armband, which now looks like it's his again after there was some speculation it had been given to Neal Kent. Kent would draw first blood for the Fleur de Lis in the 23rd minute, scoring a goal from the 18 yard box, rare for the defensemen. Tumo Makanopalani evened the draw in the 28th minute, and the half would end at 1-1. In the second half, Girard Giroux scored in the 47th minute off a penalty kick. Christopher Savard hit the crossbar a minute later, before Yves Savard turned the ball over to the Vaian forward core. Makanopalani would even the score with his second of the game on that rush, in the 49th minute. That would be the last scoring for the Vaians in game 1. Giroux made the score 3-2 in the 58th minute, and in the 71st minute, Georges Allonts would add to the score, making it 4-2. The Vaians would push hard in the remaining 23 minutes, with the referee adding 4 minutes to the 90 already played. But it was not to be, and Team Sicoutimont won the first match of the Des Monts Ila Vai Cup. A few days later, it was time for round 2. This time, the Vaians came out guns blazing, scoring in the 18th minute from Runokunao Palati. Les Royales could not even this score, with Stan Sarault hitting the crossbar not once, twice, but three times in the first half. By the 71st minute, Roru Lanaipoi had beat Artyom Bergeron to make the score 2-0. At this point, if Maklohi Vai were to win, the series would be tied at 1 victory a piece. With the 2 goal advantage, the goal differential would be tied. Now down to away goals, Sicoutimont held the advantage, with 4. Knowing this, the Vaians pushed hard in the final 19 minutes to the 90th, but Bergeron kept the shots back. In the 91st minute, Girard Giroux's clearing attempt found a streaking Georges Allonts, who buried it to make the score 2-1. That's how the score would end, giving Sicoutimont the first Des Monts Ila Vai Cup victory, due to a +1 advantage on goal differential. "This was a great series. Maklohi Vai and Sicoutimont are similarly ranked teams, and both play exciting football. We could just as easily have lost that series had Artyom not stood on his head. What's even better is that we were drawn into the same group, so we can look forward to 2 more matches between these teams," said Marc Denis after the game. We look forward to further meetings between these two teams, and we can't wait until next time around, where in 2 years Maklohi Vai will look to win their first DMIVC, and Les Royales look to defend the trophy. Next up for Sicoutimont is Schemiegelland, which we'll recap and also preview the World Cup qualification.

by **Jeruselem** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 7:15 pm

Princess Kathyrn Elizabeth Dallas (aka Princess Katy) naked in a kitchen and Melody Pond (not naked)

Katy: Hello, this is Princess Katy for Naked News. This is the RAW FOOD segment. My special guest is Melody Pond, the Jeru FC coach.
Pond: Oh hi everyone.
Katy: I heard your whiz in the kitchen
Pond: Err, no. That's just your sister Melody being mischevious again
Katy: Anyway, you're here to make your favourite meal.
Pond: Well, one of the few I can make without poisoning someone by accident.

Katy: So who cooks at home?
Pond: Not me
Katy: So hubby cooks more than you
Pond: Obviously the cooking gene doesn't work in my case
Katy: So what are you making today
Pond: Mustard and chilli chicken

Katy: Sounds spicy Pondy
Pond: You can put less mustard and chilli
Katy: Most heat I say, I like my spicy stuff
Pond: I'm sure you do
Katy: And magically we have all the ingredients here already
Pond: Wish that happened at home

Katy: So what's first?
Pond: Well, you get the chicken. Wow, this one is bigger than ones I use.
Katy: That is the smallest chicken we can get here
Pond: Oh, we don't eat too much.
Katy: No wonder you never put on weight
Pond: Err, nevermind. And you rub low fat butter on the skin

Katy: Oh, this is butter but it's not low fat.
Pond: You rub the butter into the skin, but not too much
Katy: Until is sort of yellow
Pond: Yeah that's it
Katy: I'll do the wubbing
Pond: You're good at that

Katy: So what's next?
Pond: We get some mustard, like two tablespoons and put some chill flakes in it
Katy: Chilli flakes are very hot
Pond: Not too much unless you like it that way
Katy: I like a bit of bite in my chilli
Pond: This should be hot enough

Katy: What sort of mustart do you use at home?
Pond: The cheap stuff, can't really afford expensive stuff
Katy: We've got good English mustard here
Pond: It's good stuff, but it's sure not cheap here
Katy: We don't use crap in this kitchen
Pond: OK, we melt some butter and mix it with mustard and chilli

Katy: I'm guessing we paint it on the chicken
Pond: Yes, I don't rub it on the chicken with my hands with the butter as it's really hard to get rid of the smell
Katy: And chilli flakes aren't nice to eat raw
Pond: Not good for the eyes either
Katy: So we get a brush and paint on the spicy butter?
Pond: Yes, make sure kids don't try to drink it.

Katy: What's next?
Pond: Make sure you have a pre-heated oven at 180C
Katy: Of course, we already did that here.
Pond: Chop some potatoes into quarters, after you peel and wash them of course
Katy: Small ones or normal ones.
Pond: Gotta be decent sized ones

Katy: We have some here, chopped and cleaned. We don't need to show people how to do that. it's not rocket science.
Pond: Put the chicken into the roasting tray and put the potatoes around it. You can put other veges like carrots.
Katy: I have some carrots and turnips here just for fun
Pond: Roast for about two hours.
Katy: Since we don't have two hours to stand around and sleep, we have one we made earlier.
Pond: Yes, I wish this happens at home too.

Katy: The magic of TV pondy
Pond: Looks good Katy
Katy: I like the brown golden with red specks on the chicken
Pond: The veges are soaked all the yummy juices
Katy: This looks like a winner Pondy
Pond: It's not rocket science.

Katy: When we come back, we eat some of this and make a souffle.
Pond: I burn souffles
Katy: You can learn right here.
Pond: I really mean burn
Katy: Time management Pondy
Pond: Well ...

by **Glascovia** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 7:51 pm

Ministry of Culture, Media, and Sport
Cansæ, Glascovia
15 March, anno Imperii CXIX

Paisley? Seriously, what were they thinking?

Bold, bright teardrops of twirling violet and yellow seemed to radiate from the framed, signed 1965 national team kit hanging on the wall, and Herius Falx could have sworn he felt his eyes burning a bit. The praetor's office was plastered with old Glascovian kits from years past—and of all the jerseys arrayed on the walls, Herius had decided that the 1965 one was easily the greatest affront to aesthetics and good taste.

Admittedly, that fluorescent purple-and-gold checkerboard's pretty bad, but, still—nothing's worse than paisley. Thank Venus that the Screaming Eagles have gotten to play in something tasteful these past few years.

Herius knew better than most that kits were far from decisive on the football field. His own team, Via Salis FC, had spent untold aurei designing and procuring beautiful, green Prince of Wales check kits, but every year, FC Ludovicopolis pulverized them. Still, the words of Herius's grandfather rang true to the twenty-five year old defender. "Herius, my boy," his grandfather had once said. "Never, ever underestimate the importance of appearances." Admittedly, Herius's grandfather had some bias there—after all, he had been a tailor, and appearances gave him his bread and butter.

Herius had to shake himself from his fashion-fixated reverie. Surely, he thought, Praetor Awolowo hasn't invited me to the Ministry to appraise his collection of football kits. But why on Earth has he brought me here?

While the football player finished studying old Glascovian uniforms, Tsholofelo Awolowo, Praetor of the Empire for Culture, Media, and Sport, poured two cups of tea, handing one to Herius. "Drink up," the praetor said. "Please, I insist." Herius knew better than to turn down Awolowo's offer, even though the last thing he needed was more caffeine. Awolowo, a former footballer for FC Cansæ, was a trim, grizzled man of forty-five, and his penchant for flying off the handle was well documented. During his Imperial Premier League career, Awolowo had broken the record for most red cards earned, and no player had topped him since.

"Thank you, Praetor," Herius said softly, grasping the teacup and taking a small sip. "Good stuff right here."

"It's Yohannesian," Awolowo replied, shrugging. "They've got a good reputation, don't get me wrong, but I still prefer a good, old-fashioned cup of Glascovian breakfast tea—nothing beats that smoky note, you know?"

Awolowo sat down behind his desk, clasping his hands together and taking a deep breath. "I could pontificate about tea all day long, but business has to come first. Do you know why I asked to see you?"

"Honestly, Mr. Awolowo, I haven't the faintest idea," Herius replied, shaking his head. "I was rather hoping you could, uh, clue me in."

"I'll cut to the chase, Falx. I want you to play for Glascovia in the World Cup," Awolowo said. The praetor leaned back in his leather chair, sipping his tea and soaking in Herius's nonplussed reaction.

"Me? You want me for the national team?" Herius said incredulously. "But... but why?"

"Don't tell me you can't handle it," Awolowo chided with a small chuckle.

"No, no, it's not that… it's just that, well, I've never exactly been a contender for the Screaming Eagles. I play for a team that just barely squeaks into the Imperial Premier League each year. I mean, there are so many better players, so many more obvious picks. Why not the other Tyrannus brother? Or Phocas? Or even Zeno?"

"Very true, very true," Awolow responded. "But that goddamned disgrace Bubo changed everything."

Herius instinctively cringed at the mention of the name. Opiter Bubo, a Glascovian superstar, the darling of Sinus Augustiorisque United, had shamed Glascovia when he played through the first two games of the Baptism of Fire drunk.

"I mean, playing in the Baptism of Fire with a BAC of 0.19? I swear, I actually called up the Ministry of Justice to see if we could straight up execute him for that."

Herius just stared at Awolowo; the praetor laughed. "Apparently, that's not allowed. Who knew? Anyway, Bubo was a jackass, a partying playboy who never worked for anything in his life. Do we really want him representing our nation to the world? But you—you've worked hard for years, you've pulled yourself up by your bootstraps. That's what Glascovia's all about, I want the world to know that. So let's show everyone what we're really made of."

"I don't think the team'll go for it, Praetor. You know how people look at Via Salis. We're a joke."

"Then you'll just have to change Glascovia's misconceptions," Awolowo replied with a mischievous smile. "C'mon, what do you say? Your Empire needs you."

"A chance to play in the World Cup? How could I possibly turn it down?"

by **Milchama** » Mon Mar 25, 2013 10:51 pm

"Holy sh*t!"

"What?"

"We're the top seed in our group"

"Really?"

"Yeah, we're ranked 20th which is above Jeru FC"

"What are they ranked?"

"25"

"No way"

"Incredible huh?"

"Yeah actually"

"Guess they must have sucked the last few cycles"

"Probably"

"Well they didn't qualify last cup"

"That explains it"

"Yeah"

"Anybody else worth a damn?"

"Nah, I think this group is a cupcake walk in the park"

"Who else do I know?"

"West Guiana"

"Sure we had them last time, I think. If not the time before that"

"Yeah"

"87th ranked"

"Thanks for that"

"Free South Califas"

"Anarcho-Commies who don't understand the Israeli-Palestinian conflict"

"Yep, no sense of nuance in those guys"

"Yeah"

"Oh well they also suck at soccer"

"Yeah beating them would be nice"

"Definitely"

"So what are they ranked?"

"72"

"Ok easy as well"

"I still want to know what happened to Occupied South Califas"

"I don't think it's pretty"

"Probably not"

"I bet you North Califas is even worse"

"I don't want to go there"

"At least the country is nice"

"Truth"

"Mesoland is ranked 57th"

"Ok should be pretty easy"

"Definitely"

"You know, I miss that prediction we did last time"

"Why aren't Milchamian newspapers doing it this time?"

"I have no idea"

"Probably because it's Pesach"

"Oh good point"

"You know we shouldn't post this on Chag"

"Too late"

"True"

"Oh well"

"Yeah so this group is a cupcake in other words"

"Yep the only question is in what MD does Milchama qualify for a second straight World Cup"

"Sweet"

"Let's see them do it"

"Come on You Warriors!"

"Let's Go Milchama!"

by **New Sideburn** » Tue Mar 26, 2013 1:51 am

"Pink shirts, you're tellin' me," Gethin said, faintly incredulous and still suffering from flashbacks to Integristan. "Every fuckin' step I take I'm surrounded by pink fuckin' shirts. I don't believe this."
"Chief," said Jessica Mortlock, gripping his shoulder. "That's a bit much. Calm yourself, eh?"
"Calm, she says! How can I bloody stay calm with these chucklefucks about to play us at home?"
"We've got a chance," said Sophia Lotus, devoid of conviction. "We've always got a chance."
"Yeah," said Karlos Hydrant, midfield coach. "Play to our strengths, against their weaknesses. I don't think they'll respond well to our strength and courage."
Gethin snorted. "So kick 'em off the pitch, you mean."
"Pretty much."
"Right then... how about this?"

"Pretty much like that, yeah." It would mean Tara's first cap. Hopefully her first goal. Gethin nodded, got up and shook everyone's hands. When he left the room, he still felt irritated at not being undisputed top dog of the entire world. Someday, he'd probably have to retire... this 'national team' shit was stressful.

But Jess Mortlock was clever, and learning quickly. Gethin had been grooming her to be his successor for some time now. She lacked Gethin's daring, but had a little more common sense to back it up with. They complemented each other well, and the tall, stocky woman with the lazy, heavy-lidded blue eyes would soon be the one giving her men the bollocking they deserved after a shitty match.

They just had to not get utterly slaughtered in this one, first.

by **Filopines** » Tue Mar 26, 2013 2:30 am

We will be returning to our usual programming soon, but for now...

We're in Group 1!

It might sound quite good, but it's not.

First of all, Filopines is ranked 144 in the KPB rankings.

Let's have a look at the other teams in our group (and their rank):
Victorious Islands of Mitonesia 336
Yakostan 324
Lisander 286
The Royal Kingdom of Quebec 164
San Potato 98
Itturibita 65
Armed Bears 55
United Gordonopia 29
The Holy Empire 2

When you looked at the start of that list you were probably thinking, "DAAAAAAAMN!!! U stupid repota! How u bekum jahnalist?"
But did you see the last few nations in that list?
Sigh.

Like a little teapot, this article was short and stout.
Goodbye.

But of course, I'm kidding.

This is who I think will do well for Filopines this World Cup (Qualifying):

Stephen Cayley, the captain, is always a consistent performer despite his age but we all expect him to rise onto the international scene in the next few weeks and he could attract offers from the top leagues.

Kenneth Nolder, the second choice keeper is edging very near to becoming our first choice despite Garcia still being 27. He is making the most of his opportunity for the Far Point Islanders in The Babbage Islands football league (Futbala Campionado de Babgoj). He is touted to be among the best keepers Filopines has ever 'breeded' (Don't tell anybody!). In fact, he is the first and only Filopinian to play in an overseas league so far.

David Arbeloa is the second oldest player selected for the upcoming tournament (Paul Rhett being the oldest at 40 and I think he's almost had enough of the 'senior citizen' jokes) and is expected to play a big role in defence with the next oldest centre back being 24 (David Marsley). So he'll be wanting to end his career on a high. He expected to announce his retirement in the next few days after speculation after two injury-ravaged years.

by **Bearded Moose** » Tue Mar 26, 2013 3:41 am

[Thorsten Ulfhem, defending midfield from Hochem Ballspiel and the national squad]

As I was wandering through the hallway, I kind of regretted that I hadn’t joined the other guys at Joachim’s home. His wife would probably be delivering cans of beer quicker than all of them could finish them, while Joachim was ordering her around. I couldn’t help but chuckle when recalling the time when Bernd was so loaded that he started dancing on their kitchen table. While Greta, Joachim’s wife, was terrified that he would fall off and break a limp, her man cheered him on by turning the volume of the music up a bit. This caused all the other guys from the Hochem team to join Bernd and trash their furniture. Hell of a party, well, until the cops came around for nightly disorder. As a good captain, Joachim looked for all the debts and brought us home safely.

No sign of nightly disorder where I was now, as a sacred silence accompanied me in the shaded lights. Despite the fact that it was only a few minutes before six, the darkness of the evening had already dropped over the HCHE, the Hochem Community Home for the Elderly. Ever since grandma had been having troubles with walking, she had lived here. The basic idea was genius and well-adapted to the needs of the inhabitants. In groups of six, elderly people lived together in some form of commune. Each had their room, but most of the spaces were shared. Every family had to take care of the complete group one day out of six. It made it easy for the families and the people who lived in the HCHE. L-block, where grandma Ulfhem lived, was located on the north side of the complex and therefor gave away a cold impression, but the group was a tight nod. I was glad for her that she had found not only a house but a home here, after grandpa died. And today, was my day to assist.

“Anna? Anna! There you are.”

I took Anna by her arm and guided her gently to the dining room.

“You were going for an evening stroll again, Anna? No need for that, we’re just going to eat.”

It wasn’t the first time that Anna had forgotten what time it was. Or where she had left the keys or her jacket. Or that she had put the dishes in the washing machine and the clothes in the dishwasher. But apart from Georg, who claimed that ‘that silly old cow’ made their way of life impossible, the other residents didn’t want that she would be put away in a classic retirement home. Before the dementia had hit her, she had been the glue of the L-block.

“I’m sorry, young man, but why are you holding my arm?”
“It’s me, Thorsten. Diane Ulfhem’s grandchild. It’s time for dinner, mashed potatoes with sausage and cauliflower, your favorites Anna.”
“Oh, I see. You’ve grown, haven’t you? You still play that game of yours?”

If I would have grown each time she claimed me to be, I would have been the size of a tree by now. Arriving in the dinner room, I helped her to take a seat –the hip wasn’t what it used to be anymore- and grabbed a clean plate for her. The other residents feasted already over their dinner while looking at the live draw in New Montreal.

“What time are they going to pick your team again, Thorsten boy?”, Berthe asked, as usual with earshattering volume.
“We’re in pot seven, Berthe, what pot are they picking at the moment?”
“I think pot four. Or five. Five, isn’t it, Julius?”

As usual when Diane yelled something to her husband, Julius nodded and continued with his dinner. The lips below the walrus moustache hardly split for something else than food and if he spoke, which was rare, he tried to keep his message as short as possible. Living together with a chatterbox like Diane had left its marks on Julius.

“What are those numbers next to those team names?” Berthe bellowed again.
“Rank number and their KPB,” Heinz explained with a calm voice. “Based on our Baptism of Fire, Bearded Moose has received 1,88 points and got ranked number 200, isn’t it Thorsten?”

As usual, Heinz was correct. Mentally, he was swift and agile like a thirty-year old, but a car crash had shattered his legs and he was confined to his wheelchair. To help grandma, my biggest fan, he had started a collection with newspaper articles and tapes about my performances and he knew more about it than myself right now. Whilst giving the residents a new piece of meat and a fresh napkin, grandma pulled my arm.

“It’s your turn now, I believe,” her soft voice whispered.

Name by name got pulled out of the seventh pot, each time accompanied with commentary by Georg who had already concluded a few pots back that it didn’t matter.

“Who cares what group we’re in? We’ll lose anyway. Us making the top two against all those big shots? That’s just madness. We’ll be lucky if we grab a point, mark my words!”

After a while, a few familiar names started moving past the screen. Nekoni was drawn into group 8, Mycellena in 12, Nenets in 13 and New Sideburn in group 15. In the end, it was us and Peripanland who were left. When the host drew the card with Peripanland on it, I already started calculating. Group 19, up against The Archregimancy, Michael VII, Ko-Oren, Jedi8246, Timfen and Secundas Kasius.

“Is that a good draw, Thorsten?” Berthe yelled.
“Of course it is not,” Georg mumbled.
“Well, it could be worse I believe but it surely could’ve been better. The Archregimancy is a class side, but every group needs a favourite. Michael VII is the weakest pot 2-team, but they’re still top-level. Ko-oren is really good and Jedi, Timfen and Secundas are in the top half of their pot as well.”

I had silently hoped for a weak side from pot six, but those wishes hadn’t become truth. A few minutes later, it became clear that Kericia, Democratic States of Fenbar and Silver Beach would complete the group. Three opponents we should be able to beat, in theory. Nonetheless, I was quite sure that there wouldn’t be a party at Joachim’s home.

“So, you’re on the road again, boy?” grandma wondered.
“Not yet,” Heinz reposted, “you’ll meet Timfen first, at home.”

My dazzled look caused him to continue.

“A fine team, Timfen, number 90 of the world. Seventh in their group last time, no top scorers but they hardly conceive a goal as well. They even grabbed a point against Mytannion, a WC team last cycle. Their striker, Brondons is quite good I believe.”

While my jaw was dropping to the floor, Heinz picked up the empty plates and rolled his way to the kitchen.

“You’ll help me with the dishes, Diane?”, he said while I was still nailed to the ground.
“Just encyclopedia knowledge,” murmured Georg, but secretly he was astonished as well.

by **West Zirconia** » Tue Mar 26, 2013 4:19 am

The schedule for West Zirconia's World Cup Qualifying campaign has been released. Fears that this may be the last campaign to use the aging, crumbling edifice of Williamson Park - home to the once-mighty Banks - were heightened when it was announced that the all-new 55,000-capacity Graham Park, across the city in Broxton, has been nominated as one of the host stadia for this campaign. The match against Liventia will be the real test for the stadium, built in response to home club Broxton and Marrs Hill's promotion to Division One and so far the only real investment in the club shown by chairman Jordan Sunderland.

Responding to the news, Sunderland said, "It's an honour to see Graham Park chosen to host a qualifying match. I'm confident that we will rise to the big occasion of an international match. Of course, it's even more meaningful having Andy Peters, a Broxton lad himself, coming here as the captain."

Andy Peters himself was upbeat about playing in his hometown: "It's an honour to captain my country anywhere, but to go back to Broxton and do it there - it's just amazing."

The full schedule is as follows:

Matchday 1: Runimia (at Williamson Park, Banks)
Matchday 2: Kartvelistan (away)
Matchday 3: Ossidiacqua (at STORMGroup Stadium, Mort Park)
Matchday 4: Romantique Belle Vie (away)
Matchday 5: Liventia (at Graham Park, Broxton)
Matchday 6: West Angola (away)
Matchday 7: Ancharmunn (at Edge Hill, Bradley)
Matchday 8: Bears Armed (at Manchester Street, Moorcroft)
Matchday 9: Alexanderburn (away)

Matchday 10: Runimia (away)
Matchday 11: Kartvelistan (at Marc Edwards Memorial Stadium, Redwood)
Matchday 12: Ossidiacqua (away)
Matchday 13: Romantique Belle Vie (at City of Houghton Stadium, Houghton)
Matchday 14: Liventia (away)
Matchday 15: West Angola (at Wickett's Lock, Taylor's Cross)
Matchday 16: Ancharmunn (away)
Matchday 17: Bears Armed (away)
Matchday 18: Alexanderburn (at KPM Stadium, Snaith)

Manager Ben Phillips said of the draw, "Well, any eleven men can beat any other eleven men on the day. Whether we can do it eighteen times or not is another matter, but we'll certainly give it our best shot."

by **Mapletish** » Tue Mar 26, 2013 4:24 am

The Football Kaki, Objetivo: Copa del Mundo
WC 64 Group 12 Preview

John Smiths, Your Football Kaki

So this is the Lions eighth attempt on the World Cup or it was less than that? Let me recall so they made their official debut to the NSWC tournament on the Baptism of Fire 44, a pre-World Cup 57 tournament for newer countries. So how many series passed from then? Yes, this is the Lions' eight attempt on the World Cup qualification. Anybody can comment on Group 12 now, an exciting group that can turn either ways, the Lions will be facing old rivals Gyatso-kai, for the third time in the World Cup qualifying.

I wasn't expecting much from the Lions here in the Copa Rushmori XIII, however they did well there as they finished the group as the group winners. Then the Lions moved forward as they close in on the hosts in the 1st knockout round with a close 3-2 win. In the quarter-finals, the Lions were knocked out straight by a minnow team that has little experience on the international stage. A pretty good results as compared to the previous few attempts in which the Lions were knockout cold either in the Round of 16 or in the group stages. Was it a good guage for the Lions on where they might stand? The cold hard answer is a plain "no", mixing senior and youth players doesn't seem right and this doesnt give the senior team more chances to gel together.

Team Preview

Goalkeepers
Taking a look at the goalkeepers selected by Janette here. So we have Sapphire Avalon in the team, I can say that she has got the experience needed to perform in the international stage here being in the team since World Cup 62. She has proved to be pretty agile in dangerous situation and this can be seen in the Mapletish Women's Premier League when she takes the goal for New Portland Rovers. I thought I was able to see better choices make the team for such an important tournament however to my dismay, Janette opted to play with the Women's team which was not what I have expected.

Travis Hard was definitely a better choice to choose from mainly due to his experience in the Premier League. However he failed to make the squad and didn't retain his spot. Maryam Stephanie, the second goalkeeper chosen by Janette in her final team sheet. It was a pity that an injury threw her chance away from getting selection into Muain Newtons final squad in the WC 62. She is a talented one no doubt and she is currently the most experienced keeper in the team having played a few years more than the starter, Sapphire.

Defenders
Defenders, the line of people that guards the goalpost mainly the second last line of defence before the goalkeeper. The ones who get blame for the goals that are conceded. Nah, better not. This campaign's defensive line features the likes of the entire Women's team with Taylor Sadie leading the defence, partnered by Vivian, Jaimie and Mei Kei. It would be good if Cecilia Maddalena was here but let's face the truth, she has retired. The defence scores a 3.5/5 from me here, I guess there are other better players to include into the teamsheet, such as the up and coming Sabrina Edgar on the right to replace Vivian and Janet Krist to replace Jaimie for someone who is better in tackling.

Midfielders
The all hardworking five men box in the middle of the pitch, the engine room of the team and the middle of the entire spectrum. One of the most important parts to the entire spectrum. Let's take a look at the defensive midfield pairing, so we have Jessie Leons and Gosta Esbjörn. So it's a mixture of the young and the experienced, so we have a fast and all rounded Jessie on the right and the more experienced playmaker type of player on the left. Ball distribution should be easier here, with experience key to Gosta, he could bail the Lions out of danger from his position.

So in the centre of the pack, we have Ai Jing, a small framed midfielder who is currently playing her trade in Struggait United. Accurate passing and amazing technique covered most of her physical weakness, in the centre of the engine room, her accurate passes and creativity would be more than appreciated. However I prefer a more experienced player in the centre as Ai Jing isn't a very good game reader from some a hetic position as seen in training sessions sometimes in the centre. I would have preferred to put Gosta in the centre and have Ai Jing at the defensive midfield position where she is at a position with lesser pressure.

So in the attacking midfielder position, we have Enkainia and Di Natile, no doubts of their ability there, they have been paired up that way since the 62nd WC qualification and that have benefited them well. Each knowing each other well, this can be seen from their coordination from training, and off the pitch, both are progressing well too, that is another story though, I would rather look at the football side of things. All in all the midfield is rated 4/5 in my opinion.

Attack
Once again, Alero Junio spearheads the Lions in the attack. Integrated into the Lions' set up since the Lions' official NSWC debut, he has been the main man in matches after Francis Lee bid farewell to his lifetime commitment to football seven World Cups back. Supported by Enkainia and Di Natile, the attack is almost to its fullest potential. A 4.5/5 from me here.

Group Twelve: The Chance

Gyatso-kai - The highest ranked team in Group 12, it is highly likely that they will dominate the group. The Ice Bisons has done well for the past few World Cups and the last time the Lions and Bisons clashed, the Lions were thrown 3-1 a piece to draw a gap between the two sides in the group. The Lions failed to win the clash and in the end failed to maintain their lead in the group that might have given the Lions their automatic qualification. Finding a way against the Bisons would not be easy, squeezing the play past them wouldn't be a wise choice here, a favourable tight defensive game should favour the Lions here when they meet.

Mapletish - Yes, the Lions are complacent in their form and always fail to perform in the tightest of situations. The previous World Cup qualification saw the Lions knocked out straight in the World Cup playoffs with a score flat on their faces against United Gordonponia. The Lions squeezed past a dry and terrible start to their campaign and beat off the challenge from Hutt River to consolidate their place behind the famous Queendom that stole the show right from the start and top the group. This time round, the Lions will have to get past the must-win teams in order to get the points to consolidate their qualification challenge.

Licentiapacisterra - We have never played this team before, however Licentiapacisterra was known to have hosted a Baptism Of Fire with Agazual a few cycles back. They are a strong team hanging around in the top 50, in the last check to the rankings. They are a mentally strong team and would fight for every single point that gives them the advantage to seal a victory or a comeback. They have the potential to pose a challenge to Gyatso-kai if they keep their hard mentality every match.

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