Futsal World Cup II - Rosters, Roleplays & Scores

[Jesselton]

[OOC: Please keep all out of character discussion on the discussion thread, thank you!]

Group A (Kepayan)
Jerusalem (2)
Cafundeu (8)
Iglesian Archipelago (11)
Franberry
Casari
Bozztonia

Group B (Likas)
The Macabees (1)
The Babbage Island (6)
Albundania
Euro-trash
Sibirsky
Andrewboy

Group C (Donggongon)
Taeshan (4)
Antarctistan & The Yorozuya (9)
Euroslavia
Kenavt
Jesselton
Swartaz

Group D (Menggatal)
Somewhereistonia (3)
Queer Poco el Mono Ara (7)
Delaclava (10)
Docky
Nouvelle Rhodes
Connar Republic

MATCHDAY SCHEDULE
Group Stages
Matchday 1 - 23.10.09 (0000 GMT) - 1 vs 6, 2 vs 4, 3 vs 5
Matchday 2 - 26.10.09 (1800 GMT) - 1 vs 5, 2 vs 3, 4 vs 6
Matchday 3 - 28.10.09 (1800 GMT) - 1 vs 4, 2 vs 5, 3 vs 6
Matchday 4 - 30.10.09 (0000 GMT) - 1 vs 3, 2 vs 6, 4 vs 5
Matchday 5 - 02.11.09 (1800 GMT) - 1 vs 2, 3 vs 4, 5 vs 6

Quarter Final - 04.11.09
QF1 - Winner of Group A vs Runner Up of Group B (Kepayan)
QF2 - Winner of Group C vs Runner Up of Group D (Donggongon)
QF3 - Winner of Group B vs Runner Up of Group A (Likas)
QF4 - Winner of Group D vs Runner Up of Group C (Menggatal)

Semi Final - 06.11.09
SF1 - Winner of QF1 vs Winner of QF2 (Menggatal)
SF2 - Winner of QF3 vs Winner of QF4 (Donggongon)

Third Place Play-Off - 09.11.09
L1 - Loser of SF1 vs Loser of SF2 (Likas)

Final - 09.11.09
W1 - Winner of SF1 vs Winner of SF2 (Kepayan)

[The Macabees]

Macabee National Futsal Team: Futsal World Cup II Squad

The Golden-Whites' futsal team return to the futsal arena, once more, to defend their crown. Ten men were chosen to represent the Second Empire at home, and those ten men conquered the competition and became the first Futsal World Cup champions in the history of the sport. Not only did they complete this dream, but they did it by steamrolling Somewhereistonia's own squad 8–2. Thirteen men, many of them the same, return to hopefully win the cup for the second consecutive time, and seal the Golden-Whites' place as one of the most powerful futsal teams in the world. It will not be easy, though. Subchampion Somewhereistonia is coming back, hoping to win what four years ago was denied to them. Fourth placed Taeshan, who ended fourth, is also returning to improve upon their standings. There are many new teams, all of which hope to put at least one foot into the international world of futsal. This is the largest futsal tournament to ever take place, with twenty-four teams, and should therefore be quite interesting to see pan out. Also, this is the first international futsal tournament to not be played in the Second Empire, which should be interesting for the defending champions.

We will see how it goes this year. The Golden-Whites' are definitely one of the favorites.

Style Modifier: +2

Kit
[float=left][/float]
The home futsal kit is designed to represent the original colors of the Macabee flag. The gold represents "the Golden Throne", while the black and white are taken directly from the old Imperial flag. However, the four stars represent the "Old Empire", and the three new territories (Guffingford, Safehaven and Theohuanacu). The Imperial Eagle, of course, represents Fedala and the House of Catalán, as well as the Second Empire. This specific kit was first designed for this specific year, and was released earlier during the year. Although usually Macabee national teams tend to opt for foreign kit contractors, this one is unique since it was designed and produced by a local clothing company. So, the Macabee National Futsal Team is one of the few teams to have opted for a local kit maker. It is expected to remain the Imperial kit for some time to come—at least until Futsal World Cup II.

Management
Manager: Síesmar Ret—At forty-nine, he is an experienced futsal manager, who used to play and manage for the Fedala Imperial Futsal Team (a branch of the Fedala Imperial franchise, which also owns the football club Fedala Imperial). Although he had already proved his capabilities during his career with Fedala Imperial, he nevertheless took the reigns of the national team and won the inaugural Futsal World Cup. Similar results are expected from him for this second world cup. He certainly has the squad to shoot for the stars.

Squad
Gregor Fek (25), Goalkeeper: Fek is very young and very talented. He has the keen ability to stay close to the goal, while keeping track of the ball, making it very difficult for opposing players to score around him. As a result, he does a very good job at keeping "foreign balls" out the goal, offering a huge advantage to the national team. Although fairly large in terms of stature, he is still very athletic and nimble, allowing him to stretch himself out to force blocks. He is a very valuable asset, and the best national goalkeeper in the sport of futsal. He was the starting goalkeeper during Futsal World Cup I.

Níerma Ténebam (23), Goalkeeper: Ténebam is young, agile and talented, although generally not held in as high regard as Gregor Fek. Nevertheless, there are reasons why he was chosen as second-string goalkeeper. He is, without a doubt, the best replacement for Gregor Fek, on the national level. He has many similar attributes, although he not as experienced, nor as fast as Fek, giving him a slight relative disadvantage. Nevertheless, he is a fearless defender and has done a good job at keeping the the "goals against" count low in all of the games he has played in for his league team.

Visent Felé (27): Felé is fast and can run for long periods of time, making him a valuable player in the back of the formation and in the center. He is also a talented playmaker, which means that he has the ability to control the speed of the game, and set up the play for the strikers up front. As a result, he tends to hang back and act as a safety and playmaker simultaneously. This gives the team a large advantage in terms of being able to stop the opposing team from making a breakaway, while it also gives them a good player that can make good passes behind defenses and create goal scoring opportunities.

Díeg Nastik (23): Nastik was a replacement during Futsal World Cup I, but he is now being included as a starter. He plays great in the middle of the court, able to strike hard from a distance and also connect with players on top of court. He's a fast thinker, making him a powerful asset, and he is known for hustling up and down, giving him the ability to preform miraculous defending duties. He is, without a doubt, a great addition to the squad.

Three other players have been chosen as secondaries for the same position, more or less: Roj Cer (21), Gregor Fíel (18) and Nan Ves (19).

Jonas Catá (22): Catá is fast, flexible and a great juggler. He is known for his "Maradonas", and for setting up great shots.

Frederik Ferlón (25):

Nantes Drek (24):

All Macabee international futsal strikers tend to be young, to take advantage of an increase in energy. Three others were chosen as potential replacements during the game: Varg Cederik (22), Lars Retanol (18) and Mika Cartól (19).

[Andrewboy]

ANDREWBOY FUTSAL FOOTBALL TEAM
manager
Manager:Johnaski Serrairs
Johnaski Serrairs managed some of the top teams in the andrewboy futsal league and when he was asked to step up to the international stage he accepted. he has won 4 Andrewboy futsal league titels and 5 Andrewboy fusta cups.
squad
goalkeeper:Mike deluso
mike deluso is a 25 year old wonder keeper! he is the best keeper in andrewboy bar far. he is very good at diving and tiping but croses are his weaknees.
Back up keeper: Mike senso
mike senso is a very experienced goal keeper at 34. he has been playing in all 10 editions of the andrewboy futsal league and cup. he has good hands and good foot worl although he cant dive like he used to

Outfielders

James Bansworth: this 22 year old has got skils! he is know as the best futsal player in andrewboy and in the region. he can do many things with the ball at his feet and he has a very good long shot. viva la Bansworth

Micheal Veron: michal veron is very fast. he tends to zoom down te wing and lay in prety goood croses . he is ustopable when hes running although his hasent got very good ball control. this 23 year old whill be an asset to andrewboy's squad

Carols Cristenson: Carlos Cristenson is a natural passer at 25. he rarley takes more than 3 touches on the ball and his passes almost never misss. he hasent got great speed or great pace or spectacular skils but he can pass.

harris bord: harris bord is a great defender and he has and some equaly great expirience at 28. he has got goo pace but his stand out skill is he is a great defender. he can slid preety weel and not much gets past hime. he is also good in the air!

Backup players
Mike Ensor
Ron Bonds
Larry monoco

[The Babbage Islands]

The Babbage Islands
National futsal team roster

Starters

• *Sue Allen, 27 (keeper), Wye Celtic. Sue did not play competitive football until intramurals at Southern University, and was an amateur until her stellar performance in the futsal World Cup. Her performance there netted a pro contract from Wye Celtic.
• *Jenifer Jervis, 20, Cardiff FC. Jenifer, a capped international in football, tends to be overshadowed by the brilliance of Tegan Nash. She is a rock-solid midfielder in the outdoor game with a surprising scoring touch indoors.
• *Katrín Karlsdóttir, 18, Forest Park Rangers. Half of a speedy twin-sister striker combination, Katrin is clearly on her way up in the football world. Her sister Fjóla is on the bench for light duty this time as she recovers from shoulder surgery.
• *Tegan Nash, 22 (captain), Dover City. Tegan has 18 caps for the national football team, and is establishing herself as a world-class playmaker. She has been described as the heart and soul of this squad. Her well-regarded blog, Tegan Tells, made its debut in the recent Cup of Harmony.
• Phyllis Reeves, 23, Parisian. Phyllis has developed into a mainstay of the back-to-back Premier League champions. She is rumoured to be on the shortlist for the national football team, particularly if Cafundelese legend Ganz Ijak is in fact hired on as manager.

Reserves

*Francisca Ballesteros, 22, Gimnastico
*Diana Buckland, 20, Babbage Academy of Engineering (amateur)
Kelly Carlson, 18, South Side AC
*Debra Formicola, 22, Red Devils FC
Doreen Herzog, 21 (keeper), Baden 98
*Fjóla Karlsdóttir, 18, Forest Park Rangers
Gaby Schoß, 25, Greenville Rovers

Starred players also played in Futsal World Cup I.

[Bozztonia]

THE MIGHTY TANGERINES

The mighty Tangerines of Bozztonia make their debut in the Futsal World Cup and are happy to be underestimated, we aim to lull teams into a false sense of security with our unatheletic appearence and shock them with our surprisingly talented squad.

Goalkeeper .... Barry "The Kitten" McSpud
Reserve Goalkeeper... Pierre "Butterfingers" La Blanc

Outfielders
Jimmy "Chopper" Smith
Peregrine "Twinkletoes" Ponsenby-Smythe
Napoleon "Vive La France" De Gusto
Steven "Steveyboy" Stevenson
John "Johnboy" Johnson
Bertollini "Bert" Giaccomo Lapisssetti Asti Spumanti Spaghetti Jones
Sid "Supersub" Goggins
Cuthbert "Animal" Carruthers
Tony "Rubbish but his father is rich and sponsors the team" De Beers
Silvio"Even more rubbish but his father is the local mafia boss" Corleone

Chief coach Sir Alf "The Brain" Ramsee.

Team Motto If at first you dont succeed cheat

[Sibirsky]

The Sibirsky Capitalizt National Futsal Team

The team is making it's international Futsal debut, no players have any international experience

Starters in bold
Manager: Tim J. Thompson 59 years old

Goalkeeper: Robert C. Anderson (31 years old)
Hubert C. Pulver (34 years old)
Eduardo J. Arnott (28 years old)
John N. Inman (18 years old)
Juan C. Wade (25 years old)

Reserves:
Goalkeeper: Jack J. Cochran (18 years old)
Michael M. Scott (24 years old)
Edward C. Gray (28 years old)
Jeff M. Usher (34 years old)
Glenn D. Baca (32 years old)
Shane H. White (24 years old)
Nicholas L. Weston (20 years old)

[Somewhereistonia]

Somewhereistonia roster for Futsal World Cup I
Nickname: Eagles
Style Mod: +3
RP permissions: Bring aliens, abduct my team.... do ANYTHING you want.
Kit:
Manager: Georg Arckenkov
Roster: Starters in bold

Goalkeepers
Priit Urda (24)
Yuri Nakilov (21)

Defenders
Marek Tapili (20)
Sergey Zadkine (26)
Marc Kikoine (22)
Kleofas Ogiński (21)

Forwards
Pinchus Gabo (19)
Mikhail Bahuševič (25)
Kirk Kolas (24)
Kazys Karatkievich (21)

We have sent a load of random players from the now official but not really professional National League of Somewhereistonian Footballing Clubs. Selected by Arckenkov who led his team: the Olnavia Kittyhawks to the "championship" in the last two seasons. These guys are mostly students or recently were students who have separate careers. Due to their getting to the final last time, there are several similarities in this squad to the last one.

[Jesselton]

News deleted. No news is getting out of the Jesselton's border. Hail the new regime.

[Casari]

(players and coaches are bolded for your convenience. Style 0, RP Permissions, welcome to do anything, but don't do anything you wouldn't like done to you, thanks)

It wasn't that advanced a facility (it had the appearance of a basketball court, but the baskets had been long since dragged away when it was realized that nobody actually played Basketball, and those who did weren't going to need an arena for other people to watch them), and the lines looked like they had been spraypainted onto the wooden floor.

But, that wasn't about to damper anyone's enthusiasm- an international tryout was something not to miss, so the gym was crowded, players sitting on the bleachers, a sense of excitement running through the air, despite one overarching question.

"What the hell is Futsal, anyway?"

---

James Remoro looked up at the mass oh hopefuls spread over one set of bleachers. "Futsal is a form of five-a-side soccer."

"Ohhhhhhh." was the general response. "So, like Indoor soccer?" A yell came from his left.

"No, there's no walls."

"Well, what stops the ball from going out?" the voice said again, followed by a few murmurs of suspicion.

"Well, you don't kick the ball out."

"Oooooh, okay."

James took a moment to rub his temple before he continued. "I'm the Chief Selector and coach for the National Futsal team, who, if everything works out correctly, will be headed to Jesselton for the Futsal World Cup. Allright?" Stopping to hear the generally approving vocalizations, he continued. "Allright then. We're going to be splitting you up, in to Forwards, Back, Goalkeepers, that sort of thing, running some warmups, drills, then we'll do some scrimmaging, that kind of thing. So... we'll have Goalkeepers here on the left, Forwards on the right, and... Backs in the middle, one of the assistants will meet you from there." Looking over the crowd, he nodded and strode off, climbing the steps and ducking into the press box as players swarmed off the bleachers.

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" Lucia Adamson, Assistant coach and the only other national team selector they could find who would take on the job, asked, while her feet were up on the desk, paging through the dog-eared copy of "The Rules of Futsal" they were given two weeks ago when this whole ill-fated nightmare had begun.

"I have no idea what I'm doing. And neither do you, so I don't need the comment." he said, sitting down and looking out the window.

---

it was the end of the day, and the press box was littered with sheets of yellow legal paper, scribbled on with some drawings of diagrams, an artfully rendered llama, and what appeared to be a shopping list for a local liquor store that had been amended several times, but on top of it all was arguably the most important list of all of them. (Booze is important, you know.)

"Okay, First off, Lewis Gray, number... what was it, 42, forward." James said. "Good knack for finding the goal, not too inept at those cute little short crosses either. And, then, to be paired with him as starter, Scott Woomera, number 9. Then, rounding out forwards, Peter Westenhouse, 8, Sara Briggs, 3, and Walter O'Malley, 22."

Lucia shrugged. "I still like that other kid, the one with the things."

"Thank you. For that. Really."

"Hey. It's true."

"Is that why you... drew him... what the hell were you doing instead of watching?"

"Nothing. Shuttup."

"Well, so we can end this awkwardness rather quickly, Defense, we had number 7, Daniel Ross, then... the kid in the Tyrellia City kit, Charley Nevis, 12, Kate Ryans, 4, Tyrek Hamptons, 6-"

"What kind of a name is that anyway."

"Quit being distracting and go back to your art. Megan Riggs, 19, and two keepers, 1 and 2, Meia Eskandi and Jeff Perrin."

"That was an excellent summation... too excellent, maybe..."

"Oh, just shut up and go announce this stuff so we can go home, okay? Tell them... to come back tuesday, then we can start practicing and teaching them the rules."

"Yes sir." Lucia said, giving a salute and snap-turning out of the room, stopping at the doorway, returning for the roster as James held it out with a sheepish grin, and fled the room. James streched back, listening to the groans and shuffles as everyone started to file out, other than the ones selected, who were busy congratulating themselves. Sitting there, one thing came to mind.

"This is a horrible freaking idea."

[Docky]

Goalkeepers:
Stephan Williamson, 21
Antonio Stevenson, 21

Defenders:
Gary Thjissen, 21
Henry Zorak, 21
Kane Andrews, 21
Kaox Krul, 21

Attackers:
Larry Torres, 21
Oran Lithas, 21
Steven Vaa, 21
Sheng Yang, 21

Manager: Kieron Durrad

Kit:


Style Modifier: +2

[Bozztonia]

Style Mod +1

[Euro-Trash]

Euro-Trash Futsal II Starting Roster

1 Wayne Hennessey Goalkeeper
3 George Elokobi Defender
4 David Edwards Midfielder
5 Richard Stearman Defender
6 Jody Craddock Defender
7 Michael Kightly Midfielder
8 Karl Henry Midfielder
9 Sylvan Ebanks-Blake Striker
10 Andrew Keogh Striker
11 Stephen Ward Defender
12 Andrew Surman Midfielder
13 Marcus Hahnemann Goalkeeper
14 David Jones Midfielder
15 Greg Halford Midfielder
16 Christophe Berra Defender
17 Matthew Jarvis Midfielder
18 Sam Vokes Striker
19 Chris Iwelumo Striker
20 Nenad Milijas Midfielder
21 Daniel Jones Defender
23 Ronald Zubar Defender
24 Mark Little Defender
26 Matthew Hill Defender
27 Michael Mancienne Defender
29 Kevin Doyle Striker
30 Carl Ikeme Goalkeeper
31 Matt Murray Goalkeeper
32 Kevin Foley Defender
33 Stefan Maierhofer Striker
34 Darren Ward Defender
35 Segundo Castillo Midfielder
36 John Dunleavy Defender
37 Kyle Bennett Striker
38 David Davis Midfielder
39 Sam Winnall Striker
40 Danny Batth Defender
41 Ashley Hemmings Striker
42 Scott Malone Defender
43 James Spray Striker
44 Nathaniel Mendez-Laing Midfielder

Style Modifier: +2

[Taeshan]

Coach-Alexander Hues

Team Captain/Goalkeeper-Ludwig Hennicke

Offense-Yen I Xeda

Offense-Wismalies Gulertis

Defense-Hana~o Xusan

Defense-Amy Delgado

Bench
Marie Peters
Adam Langweilig
Petr Chevchenko
Madame Lee

The GHETTO WARRIORS

Modifier + Highest

Ow yeah

[kenavt]

The Kenavt Purple Pirates
Organized by the Futsal Association of Kenavt

Schedule
Matchday 1 - 23.10.09 - Antartictistan & the Yorozuya vs. Kenavt (7-4, Win)
Matchday 2 - 26.10.09 - Kenavt vs. Swartaz
Matchday 3 - 28.10.09 - Taeshan vs. Kenavt
Matchday 4 - 30.10.09 - Kenavt vs. Jesselton
Matchday 5 - 02.11.09 - Euroslavia vs. Kenavt

The Purple Pirates appear to land in an above average group, comprised of mostly above-average teams. However, the big match is MD3: Taeshan. The one big gun in the group, a win here would definitely prove this young, inexperienced Kenavtan team. Look for a run in the knockout rounds if the Purple Pirates get a win here.

Roster

Starting lineup
GK Riyu Desai Captain
FB Hahne Lester
MF Jacoby Pelham
MF Connor da Vincho
Striker Asa

GK Paul Kovacs
FB Alexandre Nikhcevo
MF Francisco Zeugir
MF Jon Ellsbury
Striker Nicklas Tuer

Manager Yohannes Sedachs

Who to watch out for:

GK Riyu Desai Captain
34 yrs old 5'12" 205lbs Riyu is the most experienced futsal player on the roster. He makes up for his small size with agressiveness and agility.

MF Connor da Vincho
21 yrs old 5'10" 175lbs This is the speedy playmaker, Connor, who has led the Futsal Kenavt League in assists two years in a row, despite his young age. Look for him to be a force in the midfield and near the opposing goalmouth.

Striker Asa
22 yrs old 6'3" 204lbs A soft-spoken, shy player - but a rising star in both futsal and soccer, Asa can head, kick, deke, and outrun almost everyone. If he shows up this year, then the Purple Pirates are set for a run.

OOC Comments:

Style Modifier: Highest Positive Value

[Jeruselem]

Jeruselem Futsal World Cup II team

Style Modifier: +3 (defense is for babies)

Coach: Princess Marie-Antoinette Dallas of Jeruselem
* Jeruselem World Cup playet for 44-46
* Assistant coach of the Jeruselem World Cup 47-48
* Member of the winning Futsal 2 team

Goalkeepers
* (F,24) - Heidi Ho - not exactly Jeruselem's biggest goalkeeper but she moves quickly. Her day job is selling underwear at Razzle Dazzle. She's also a bit of Ho as well.
* (M,28) - Mark Mosh - Better known for his blue spikey hair than his goalkeeping. Organises rave parties in his spare time.

Defense
* (F,20) - Shay Dallas - The daughter of Jacinta Dallas and Flak Sho. Too young for club football but the pint-sized defender is no pushover in defense. Played in World Cup 48.
* (M,27) - Yips Kipur - He'd play normal football but he sunburns very easily hence only indoor football for him.
* (F,29) - Faye Larris - Also known as Fuzzie Faye on the Internet in adult magazines.
* (M,23) - Gomez Ritchie - The enforcer of the defense which gets into trouble when he overdoes things.
* (F,21) - Modogga - Wants to be a movie star but has no talent

Offense
* (M,19) - Paul Venetio - Dancing instructor
* (M,25) - Rocco Caven - Artist and designer
* (F,20) - Kira Reed - Works at an expensive high class whorehouse for work
* (F,24) - Cassie Sawpan - An expert on Jeruselem sewage systems
* (M,26) - Landry Pothouse - A guy who knows his drugs

[Cafundeu]

CAFUNDÉU'S FUTSAL NATIONAL TEAM
The Black Toucans

The ACFS (Associação Cafundelense de Futebol de Salão), a branch of the CCFM, the official body of Cafundéu for football and related sports (including, apart from Futsal too, Beach Soccer, Blind Soccer, etc.), organized once again the futsal team for another World Cup. The association made a list with the top players of the sport in the country, to try to challenge for the trophy... again... yes, it's the same story.

The team (names used in bold, but do not write them in all capitals when RPing:

Starters:
1- Jéfferson Camilo Prado "BARRABÁS" (goalkeeper) (27)
2- DIEGO GASTÃO Bischoff (21)
7- LUCIANO Domingues Fauzen (32) - (captain)
9- LUCAS Gonzalo VALE (23)
10- Said Nardeni Shadir "SHEIK" (25)

Substitutes:
12- CLÉBER Fratti (goalkeeper) (30)
5- ADEMIR Castanhal (22)
8- Tarso Cerqueira VILLAS (27)
11- JÉFFERSON PAIXÃO Buonarotti (30)
13- Arthur Souza Dias "MENDIGO" (24)
15- Alfredo ILHOTA (25)
19- Válter Aragão Lekovic "VALTINHO" (32)
23- VICENTE Cato Moura "CABEÇÃO" (20)

Coach: Danilo Machado (50)

[Jeruselem]

Anne: I'm Anne for Fox News. I'm speaking to the Futsal World Cup II coach, professional whoreface Princess Marie-Antoinette Dallas. I was supposed to be speaking to Merginn Moffat.
Marie: Oh, Merginn ...he had an accident.
Anne: Our viewers would like to know what happened to him
Marie: He tripped over a car ... sort of.

Anne: I don't get it.
Marie: Well, he walked in front of car tumbled over the top the car, landed on the road and rolled down a hill.
Anne: How is he? Sounds bad. Was he drunk?
Marie: Err, yes he was drunk. He's just broken a few bones ... OK, more than a few.

Anne: He's lucky to be alive.
Marie: He's in intensive care so I'm taking over the team since he's pretty much out of action.
Anne: Fox News sends their condolences about his misfortune.
Marie: He does this all the time actually, just not so bad.

Anne: Now, you've made a few changes to the team.
Marie: Some of the team were looking a bit old and overweight.
Anne: But you're not exactly a 18 year old yourself.
Marie: 3 kids later, and I'll still really fit. I'm no fat overweight 50 year old. Even young fellas think I'm good looking.

Anne: There's a lot of immoral women on the team.
Marie: Who?
Anne: All of them ...
Marie: Well, that's your opinion. This is a football team, not a church committee for moral standards.

Anne: Still, you could have better people on the team. There's a professional hooker on the team.
Marie: Me?
Anne: Kira Reed
Marie: Leave her alone. She could become a football player instead you know.

Anne: I heard the team got into the cup because Bostopia pulled out and you had a late application.
Marie: Hey, nothing to do with me. I'm not supposed to be here. I've got kids to take care off.
Anne: So why was the paper work late?
Marie: Merginn dropped a lot of beer on some of the paper work which had to be redone again.

Anne: I thought the Jeruselem FA was supposed to be handling that paperwork.
Marie: Merginn was the manager so he's responsible for what happens when they get there so we have to cover ourselves legally.
Anne: Why should we have people like that Fuzzie Faye and yourself on the team who give Jeruselem woman a bad reputation.
Marie: Jeruselem women have moved away from the old stay-at-home mother model. We're the party capital of the world, which brings the tourists and the money. Having women who know a good time helps.

Anne: Doesn't this just degrade the status of women in Jeruselem, with all these hos on this team.
Marie: No, it proves even stupid Jeruselem hos can play football. That's how good our women are.
Anne: Why aren't you thinking of the children of Jeruselem and their future morals.
Marie: Think of the children? I'm a mother too. 3 kids. Don't try that moral rubbish on me. Brainwashing my kids with pure white soap isn't going save the world.

Anne: Is this a plot for the evil Zionists to take over the Christian world?
Marie: Hey, leave that Zionist talk somewhere else. We're talking football today.
Anne: Isn't all this football a distraction for a Zionist takeover of the world? You've even got a Jew on the team here - Princess Shay.
Marie: She's here for the football not for taking over the world.

[A-Stan and The Yoro]

Post Moved

[Queer Poco el Mono Ara]

Coach – Daryl Ferguson. The former Skyte City manager was awarded the position of national Futsal coach two days after the QPMAFA decided to enter the inaugural competition. Having stepped down from his position as coach of a league team he had time on his hands to coach the national side at the competition, however he was given next to no time to get to grips with the concept of managing a national Futsal team. That is in the past however and this will be Ferguson’s second shot at the competition. Queer Poco are now ranked 7th in the World and will want to prove that last time they reached the quarter finals through skill and not luck. Many changes have been made to the international team since the first World Cup and a professional league has been set up (although results are yet to be seen) and the team has some new faces.

Goalkeeper. Mohammed Bashir. (18) Mohammed is the brightest prospects in goal for the professional Futsal league. Tall, broad and quick he’s a more than capable goalkeeper and should develop into a fantastic keeper. Marks his return with the team with the captaincy.

Outfield. Alan Moore (16) A great amount of stamina and sublime footwork Alan is an exceptionally talented footballer and should bring some creative flair. Plays for Ridgemont Wolves in the Northern Conference

Outfield. Tom Welsh (20) Student by day and Futsal player by night. Tom has shone for the Valengren University team in the Southern Conference. Has been excused from his exams for a law degree to take part in the World Cup.

Outfield. Sergio Costa (18) A former Skyte academy player, he’s the shortest outfield player Queer Poco has to offer but his silky skills more than make up for his lack of height. Fast, nimble and an eye for goal (Queer Poco’s one to watch)

Outfield. Dion Wallace (22) Plays for Khaldoon Academicals, Dion has a fierce shot in him and some pretty good footwork. His team work however often lets him down and being a natural attacker he is often reluctant to pass.

Bench
Goalkeeper Johnny Valentine (21)
Outfield Dick Nash (22)
Outfield Tait Surge (18)
Outfield Randy Pope (22)
Outfield Lloyd Hoffman (16)
Outfield Marco Dequindre (23)
Outfield Lenny Bonaventure (25)

The Queer Poco Futsal Team compete in the 11-a-side's third kit.

[Jesselton]

News deleted. No news is getting out of the Jesselton's border. Hail the new regime.

[The Babbage Islands]

After a disappointing run in the Cup of Harmony, it will be nice to run up big scores indoors for a bit before the next World Cup go-round. So I'll be talking a bit of futsal for a while as well as football news.

Futsal, you ask? That's a kind of indoor football, five on a side. Believe it or not, our national team emerged from the last futsal World Cup ranked sixth in the world. And that was an all-women team! There's no professional futsal at home, of course, but 11 of our 12 players have pro football contracts and the FFB have taken up promotion and management of the sport. It's an action-packed game, very tactical, high-scoring. Passing midfielders like me love it.

So we're in Jesselton for the second Futsal World Cup, drawn into Group B as the second favourite behind The Macabees who are ranked #1 in the world. There are a lot of new teams this time. But we're taking nothing for granted as we were one of the new teams last time and wound up as quarterfinalists. I have the arm band, and that means reminding my teammates of this if we get too confident.

Speaking of teammates, all the starters are back from last time although one is playing hurt and will sub instead. Look for Jenifer Jervis of Cardiff FC to play a big role, she's really starting to get a scoring touch. And Sue Allen went from a no-name amateur keeper to a starter for Wye Celtic directly from her standout futsal performance; in many eyes, she was the strongest keeper in the competition. Katrin Karlsdottir is still a dangerous striker in any form of the game.

Which brings us to Phyllis Reeves, new to the futsal national team and new to the starting five. She's a very athletic, super-aggressive defender with Parisian, and one of the reasons they've now won the Premier League twice back-to-back. Defenders aren't always the best choices for futsal, at least in my limited experience, but her in-your-face style is perfect for the intensity of five-on-five.

Oh, by the way I just heard that Ganz Ijak is coming to manage the football Bumblebees! Too cool. He's a Hall of Fame player and has helped manage a couple of football teams deep in the World Cup, although I think this is his first time as top dog. There are rumblings about a roster shakeup, but that always happens. I don't think we've put the best team we can get out there yet, but we'll get there. Certainly it makes a big statement that we are serious about moving up.

Till next time, keep the cards and letters and email and stuff coming!

[Euroslavia]

The Euroslavia Titans
Second Futsal World Cup

After a long period of inactivity in sports in general, teams all across the nation are ready to make a grand return, for the glory of Euroslavia. The Second Futsal World Cup is the first of many competitions that multiple teams have begun to prepare for. This sport in particular is one that Euroslavia has not participated in before; however, the team itself feels prepared enough to re-enter the scene to start something new. The Titan's head coach was available for comment about the entry of it's team into this Cup:

"Seeing as the Titans are new to this Cup, how do you feel the team will perform?" states Ibis Nieves, lead reporter for the Alpha News Channel.

"You know, as much as I would love the Titans to come into this and dominate the competition, it's not something that I'm expecting. There are more experienced teams in this World Cup that will have the clear advantage over a new team. I don't expect us to perform poorly though. We're going to do everything that we can to perform to the best of our abilities. That's all that I can ask out of my team. If we can pull off a few upsets, I'd be pretty pleased." states CT Tamburello, head coach of the Euroslavia Titans.

"Interesting," as Ibis smirked at the coaches quirky attitude, "So tell us a bit about the players of the Titans."

"Well, let's get right into that. Pete Connolly is our main goalie. His performance compared to the rest of the squad is slightly higher, in my opinion. In our national league, he has won a multitude of awards for the Arcadia Nationals, namely for completely shutting down other teams offensive capabilities; however, this isn't just something that a goalie alone can do. The rest of our starters are Wes Bergmann, Noor Jehangir, Vincent Foti, and Cohutta Grindstaff. The coordination between these players has been absolutely amazing in the last few practices we've had. Despite playing with different teams... well, besides Pete and Cohutta, it's as if they knew exactly what the other person was thinking in the field. After their performances well surpassed how I thought they would do in the last few games of the season, I certainly have high hopes for this World Cup. The team itself has been doing everything to prepare for their upcoming match-ups. I'm truly proud of them."

"It definitely sounds like you guys are ready to prove what you're made of! I'm hoping for a few upsets myself, but all we can ask is that they do their best! Thank you for your time CT, and hopefully the next time we meet, is for an interview for the team becoming the Cinderella story of the Cup!"

[Andrewboy]

ANDREWBOY SHOWING FUSTAL WORLD CUP ON TV!
Several tv stations accros andrewboy have bought the rights to the fustal world cup.
Fans are delighted that they will be able to show support for andrewboy at the fustal world cup.
these are the station showing the fustal world cup
ABC(andrewboy Brodacting Channel)(regular cable) will be showing 1 match on each matchday
andrewboy sport(regular cable)will be showing 1 match on each match day with pre game and post game shows
Andrewboy fustal channel(Digital cable) will be showing 1 match each matchday
Drew sportnet east(digital cable)will be showing 1 match each matchday with pre and post game shows
Drew sportnet west(regular cable)will be showing 1 match each matchday with pre and post game shows
Drew sportnet north(digital cable)will be showing 1 match each matchday with pre and post game shows
Drew sportnet south(digital cable)will be showing 1 match each matchday with pre and post game shows

[kenavt]

The Poiuytrewq Enquirer-Journal
All the news in fits of print!

A LOOK AT THE KENAVT PURPLE PIRATES AT THE SECOND FUTSAL WORLD CUP

indentDonggongon, JESSELTON- The Kenavt Purple Pirates arrived in Jesselton yesterday, looking to get in a couple more practices before Second Futsal World Cup starts. The Purple Pirates Club, as always, also arrived with them, albeit with a smaller contingent. The leader, Sebastien Tywer, says he has a little surprise in store for the football World Cup, but doesn't really know anything about futsal. "We just thought we'd support our boys abroad as they try to be justice to our name! C'mon Pirates!"

indentThe squad is mostly composed of players from the planned upcoming World Cup 49 roster, including the three big names: Asa, Riyu Desai, and Connor da Vincho, the three most famous football players in over a generation. Riyu is possibly the best goalie ever to cross the borders of Kenavt, while da Vincho has achieved fame for his legendary passes and set-ups plays already at twenty-one, after playing for the Club de Poiuytrewq Football for three years. Asa is the most famous of them all, as he led the whole Kenavt Premier Championship League in goals for the CPF, with da Vincho to set him up. That explosive duo should set the pace for the whole team.

indentThe Purple Pirates are in Group C, with a bunch of somewhat capable opponents: Taeshan, Antarticistan & the Yorozuya, Swartaz, and the hosts Jesselton. The first game up is versus Antartictistan & the Yorozuya, ranked ninth in the world. They are a capable bunch who are returning stronger than ever, with a supposedly revamped roster that has not yet been seen. They will be a good opponent to get a point (or more) from to set the pace. The second match is versus the most unknown team, Swartaz. A win here should be guaranteed over such weak competition, though - anything less would be unacceptable.

indentHowever, the third and fourth matches are the scariest of all. That legendary sporting giant Taeshan comes to play with the Pirates. They got fourth in the inaugural World Cup, so a win here would essentially catapult us into the knockout rounds. This is no joke. If we can beat Taeshan, we can beat almost anybody. The next opponent are the hosts, Jesselton, who are also in their first World Cup. Jesselton is a good team pretty much anyday, but what makes this match so intense is what the Jesselton Time's Usop Sontoloyo reported just yesterday: "Jesselton vs Kenavt: What can I say about this other than 3 points?"

indentConnor da Vincho, when cornered with this news, immediately responded, as he always does. After all, he's arguably one of the most controverial players ever, even at the ripe age of twenty-one. "We'll show those f**king a**h*les who's in charge. Those stuck-up b*st*rds, they're just so cocky because they're hosting. They'll probably be fixing matches, you know what I mean?"

indentRiyu Desai, the team captain, took a more moderate stance. "Obviously, now that game's got some added significance, but the fact is that every one of those five games is significant. But now Jesselton's just provided us some extra motivation to go get three points. They might want to watch out."

indentThe last match is versus Euroslavia, another relative unknown but one expected to pose tougher competition then Swartaz. Three points here will hopefully solidify Kenavt's standing in this tough group and send them to the second round.

indentWe'll be back next week with results from the A&Y vs. Kenavt game. Look for us on your local newstand.

[Bozztonia]

BOZZTONIA REPORTER
22nd October 2009

Special report from Bozztonia Futsal team training camp in a secret location in deepest darkest Jesselton

Hi there sports fans are you looking forward to watching Bozztonias glorious victory in this Futsal tournament? Yes, well think again I have never seen such a shambles,training camp!!! it is more like a drunken orgy of booze, women, drugs and naked twister(which was I admit quite fun).
When I interviewed Silvio Corleone about this he told me to keep my mouth shut or I would be a breakfast for the worms tomorrow.Well I will not be silenced nor intimidated by the local gangsters greasy offspring.He can jolly well go and sh.......(Editors note Our Chief sports reporters phone call got cut off at this point, however the phone lines to Jesselton are notoriously bad and we will bring you the rest of the report if errrr I mean when we hear from him again}