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Human Meat Food! Welcome to The Cannibal Cafe!

A meeting place where national storefronts can tout their wares and discuss trade. [In character]
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Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

Human Meat Food! Welcome to The Cannibal Cafe!

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Fri May 01, 2020 8:05 am

Give me your order, and I give you human meat products!!

Cannibal soup
Blood cup
Blood cup with eyeball in it to look fancy
BLT (Bones, legs, and tears sandwich)
Human Fingers (not chicken fingers!)
Dried Pancreas
Toenails and Salsa
Arm Taco
Kneecap Juice
Corpse Bread (commonly referred to as dead bread)
Brain Salad
Artery and Vein Spaghetti
Brain Pasta
Cannibal Cafe Coffee
Wiener Sausage (-suggested by Somerania)


*thats all on our menu for now, but we’re open for suggestions!*

Note: this is not real human meat, but we have experts who have conducted research and interviewed real cannibals and we have concluded what human meat tastes like and certain parts of the body, and have fashioned normal meat into tasting what we conclude it does taste like. Therefore, this is NOT, actual human meat, just flavored and designed to taste like it.
Last edited by Empirical Switzerland on Fri Jul 10, 2020 9:42 am, edited 5 times in total.
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

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Haudegen Reich
Envoy
 
Posts: 209
Founded: Apr 11, 2020
Psychotic Dictatorship

Postby Haudegen Reich » Fri May 01, 2020 8:07 am

man, switzerland really went downhill since the Confederacy
✠ ✠ ✠ ✠ ✠ ✠
✠ ✠ ✠ ✠ ✠ ✠
✠ ✠ ✠ ✠ ✠ ✠
✠ Das Neue Haudegen Reich ✠ | Haudegenwave 3: finale d'trilogy
The Vanguards of Terror; a forgotten Wehrmacht unit turned Arctic Redoubt thirsts for a vengeance and the birthright of a homeland. Since 1945, their honour was loyalty.
"Für Führer und Reich, Rückkehr!" | "For Führer and Reich, Return to the Homeland!"
 = Associated Press - August: [...] Four more Westerners flee to Haudegen, this time from Neo-Nazi Circles in the United States. Experts worried as number of defectors to Haudegen increase  [...] 

User avatar
Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

Ugh

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Fri May 01, 2020 8:13 am

Haudegen Reich wrote:man, switzerland really went downhill since the Confederacy

Look if you're not gonna purchase one of our delicacies you can leave sir.
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

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Rhodique
Political Columnist
 
Posts: 3
Founded: Aug 02, 2019
Ex-Nation

Postby Rhodique » Fri May 01, 2020 8:16 am

Whats in the brain salad?

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Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

answer

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Fri May 01, 2020 8:18 am

Rhodique wrote:Whats in the brain salad?

I recommend the Salad, It obviously has brains in it, but we also insert arteries, veins, nerves, and if you want, chopped or whole spinal cord. Also we have ground up brain stem
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

Click to Declare War on Me | Lord Bodie Q&A | Zürich International | Lord Bodie Face Reveal!
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Republics of Central Nations
Civil Servant
 
Posts: 6
Founded: Apr 21, 2020
Ex-Nation

Postby Republics of Central Nations » Fri May 01, 2020 8:21 am

Empirical Switzerland wrote:
Rhodique wrote:Whats in the brain salad?

I recommend the Salad, It obviously has brains in it, but we also insert arteries, veins, nerves, and if you want, chopped or whole spinal cord. Also we have ground up brain stem


i want some brain salad and joe
i do not associate with vegans

User avatar
Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Fri May 01, 2020 8:23 am

Republics of Central Nations wrote:
Empirical Switzerland wrote:I recommend the Salad, It obviously has brains in it, but we also insert arteries, veins, nerves, and if you want, chopped or whole spinal cord. Also we have ground up brain stem


i want some brain salad and joe

Totally! Order coming right up! To go? or staying here in the cafe?
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

Click to Declare War on Me | Lord Bodie Q&A | Zürich International | Lord Bodie Face Reveal!
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Abortion, Large Government, Socialism, Communism, Gun Control, Illegal Immigrants, Pro Choice, Joe Biden, Police Abolishment, and Fascism


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Republic of Vareshia
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 11
Founded: Apr 05, 2020
Moralistic Democracy

Postby Republic of Vareshia » Fri May 01, 2020 8:25 am

Weirdos

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Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

Vegans, am i right? Weird..

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Fri May 01, 2020 8:26 am

Republic of Vareshia wrote:Weirdos

Sir if you are just here to use the wifi and not purchase anything I must ask you to leave.
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

Click to Declare War on Me | Lord Bodie Q&A | Zürich International | Lord Bodie Face Reveal!
Pro Life, Small Government, Legal Immigrants, 2nd Amendment, Capitalism, Free Markets, and Equal Marriage
Abortion, Large Government, Socialism, Communism, Gun Control, Illegal Immigrants, Pro Choice, Joe Biden, Police Abolishment, and Fascism


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Tinhampton
Negotiator
 
Posts: 7432
Founded: Oct 05, 2016
Anarchy

Postby Tinhampton » Fri May 01, 2020 8:28 am

Empirical Switzerland wrote:
Republic of Vareshia wrote:Weirdos

Sir if you are just here to use the wifi and not purchase anything I must ask you to leave.

"Mind if I purchase the Wi-Fi? A thousand and a half Tinhamptonian dollars, adjustable as necessary. I like cow, chicken, beef, pork, bacon, stuff like that but I'd never eat a fellow person!" - a telecoms executive who has not given out his name, yet
The Self-Administrative City of TINHAMPTON (pop. 319,372): Saffron Howard, Mayor (UCP); Alexander Smith, WA Delegate-Ambassador

Authorships & co-authorships: SC#250, SC#251, Issue #1115, SC#267, GA#484, GA#491
Other achievements: Cup of Harmony 73 champions; -45 Darkspawn Kill Points; current WA Delegate of Auctor; "Tinhampton? the man's literally god"
Who am I, really? 45yo Tory woman; Cambridge graduate; possibly very controversial; currently reading Why Nations Fail by Daron Acemoglu and James A. Robinson

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Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

Business

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Fri May 01, 2020 8:32 am

Tinhampton wrote:
Empirical Switzerland wrote:Sir if you are just here to use the wifi and not purchase anything I must ask you to leave.

"Mind if I purchase the Wi-Fi? A thousand and a half Tinhamptonian dollars, adjustable as necessary. I like cow, chicken, beef, pork, bacon, stuff like that but I'd never eat a fellow person!" - a telecoms executive who has not given out his name, yet

Sir, thanks for the offer, but we are only here to sell our finest of human meats, so I'm sorry, but we only do business with cannibals here.
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

Click to Declare War on Me | Lord Bodie Q&A | Zürich International | Lord Bodie Face Reveal!
Pro Life, Small Government, Legal Immigrants, 2nd Amendment, Capitalism, Free Markets, and Equal Marriage
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Velosia
Bureaucrat
 
Posts: 56
Founded: Nov 29, 2018
New York Times Democracy

Postby Velosia » Fri May 01, 2020 8:33 am

Perhaps you could add a vegan option? I've always wondered what they'd taste like. Carrots, probably.

Also can I have some finger nuggets and a blood cup with an extra eyeball to go, please?
.
NATION | OVERVIEW | ANTHEM
System: Elective constitutional monarchy, parliamentary democracy
Legislature: Councils of the Realm, bicameral
Upper: Council of Electors
Lower: Council of Aldermen

Head of State: Tohmas IX, King
Head of Government: Alfred Harding, Prime Minister
Capital (and largest city): Ethalstad
.
KINGDOM OF VELOSIA
"Nemo Nos et Dividerent"
Twentysomething white British male

Lifelong agnostic atheist

Middle-class, rural Conservative Party voter

Unionist, but supports constituent countries' right to self-determination

Voted to leave the European Union entirely on the grounds of sovereignty, couldn't give a toss about immigration

Eurosceptic and Brexiteer, but a proud European

Personally thinks the 'transgenderism' thing is all a bit silly

Prefers Pimm's to politics

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Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

Thankyou!

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Fri May 01, 2020 8:38 am

Velosia wrote:Perhaps you could add a vegan option? I've always wondered what they'd taste like. Carrots, probably.

Also can I have some finger nuggets and a blood cup with an extra eyeball to go, please?

Great! I will consider adding that, thanks for the suggestion! Order coming right up! Are you taking it to go? Or staying here to eat? If so, follow me to your table.
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

Click to Declare War on Me | Lord Bodie Q&A | Zürich International | Lord Bodie Face Reveal!
Pro Life, Small Government, Legal Immigrants, 2nd Amendment, Capitalism, Free Markets, and Equal Marriage
Abortion, Large Government, Socialism, Communism, Gun Control, Illegal Immigrants, Pro Choice, Joe Biden, Police Abolishment, and Fascism


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Somerania
Chargé d'Affaires
 
Posts: 429
Founded: Mar 24, 2020
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Somerania » Fri May 01, 2020 8:41 am

Empirical Switzerland wrote:Give me your order, and I give you human meat products!!

Cannibal soup
Blood cup
Blood cup with eyeball in it to look fancy
BLT (Bones, legs, and tears sandwich)
Human Fingers (not chicken fingers!)
Dried Pancreas
Toenails and Salsa
Arm Taco
Kneecap Juice
Corpse Bread (commonly referred to as dead bread)
Brain Salad
Artery and Vein Spaghetti
Brain Pasta
Cannibal Cafe Coffee

*thats all on our menu for now, but we’re open for suggestions!*

Sir is there a Wiener sausage? I would like a leg bone with the marrow as the sausage bread with a bit of blood

User avatar
Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

Order Up!

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Fri May 01, 2020 8:43 am

Somerania wrote:
Empirical Switzerland wrote:Give me your order, and I give you human meat products!!

Cannibal soup
Blood cup
Blood cup with eyeball in it to look fancy
BLT (Bones, legs, and tears sandwich)
Human Fingers (not chicken fingers!)
Dried Pancreas
Toenails and Salsa
Arm Taco
Kneecap Juice
Corpse Bread (commonly referred to as dead bread)
Brain Salad
Artery and Vein Spaghetti
Brain Pasta
Cannibal Cafe Coffee

*thats all on our menu for now, but we’re open for suggestions!*

Sir is there a Wiener sausage? I would like a leg bone with the marrow as the sausage bread with a bit of blood

Thankyou sir for your Purchase! Takeout or staying here? I will also make sure to add this to the menu and bring your order! Thanks for coming to the Cannibal Cafe!
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

Click to Declare War on Me | Lord Bodie Q&A | Zürich International | Lord Bodie Face Reveal!
Pro Life, Small Government, Legal Immigrants, 2nd Amendment, Capitalism, Free Markets, and Equal Marriage
Abortion, Large Government, Socialism, Communism, Gun Control, Illegal Immigrants, Pro Choice, Joe Biden, Police Abolishment, and Fascism


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Welzat
Spokesperson
 
Posts: 166
Founded: Nov 12, 2019
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby Welzat » Fri May 01, 2020 11:59 am

Where are these bodies coming from?
Population: 2.25 million

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Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Fri May 01, 2020 1:53 pm

Welzat wrote:Where are these bodies coming from?

Welzat wrote:Where are these bodies coming from?

That is none of your worry, they are coming out of my personal pocket and into your food! ;)





To be honest however, if you really want to know, it is the leftovers of the liberals that is spurted out of the portal to hell, (see my Factbook for more info)
Last edited by Empirical Switzerland on Fri May 01, 2020 7:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

Click to Declare War on Me | Lord Bodie Q&A | Zürich International | Lord Bodie Face Reveal!
Pro Life, Small Government, Legal Immigrants, 2nd Amendment, Capitalism, Free Markets, and Equal Marriage
Abortion, Large Government, Socialism, Communism, Gun Control, Illegal Immigrants, Pro Choice, Joe Biden, Police Abolishment, and Fascism


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Somerania
Chargé d'Affaires
 
Posts: 429
Founded: Mar 24, 2020
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Somerania » Fri May 01, 2020 2:06 pm

Empirical Switzerland wrote:
Somerania wrote:Sir is there a Wiener sausage? I would like a leg bone with the marrow as the sausage bread with a bit of blood

Thankyou sir for your Purchase! Takeout or staying here? I will also make sure to add this to the menu and bring your order! Thanks for coming to the Cannibal Cafe!

I am staying here it is better to eat food while it's hot!

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Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Fri May 01, 2020 3:26 pm

Somerania wrote:
Empirical Switzerland wrote:Thankyou sir for your Purchase! Takeout or staying here? I will also make sure to add this to the menu and bring your order! Thanks for coming to the Cannibal Cafe!

I am staying here it is better to eat food while it's hot!


Well please enjoy, as I would dare to say, our food choices in general, *says while doing finger guns and slogan voice*, STRAIGHT OUTTA HELL!!
See my factbook for more info on exactly where this is from...
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

Click to Declare War on Me | Lord Bodie Q&A | Zürich International | Lord Bodie Face Reveal!
Pro Life, Small Government, Legal Immigrants, 2nd Amendment, Capitalism, Free Markets, and Equal Marriage
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Eikotomi
Spokesperson
 
Posts: 147
Founded: Apr 18, 2020
Ex-Nation

Postby Eikotomi » Thu May 21, 2020 8:35 am

Is this establishment health-authority approved?

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Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Thu May 21, 2020 9:35 am

Eikotomi wrote:Is this establishment health-authority approved?

By our health authorities it is!
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

Click to Declare War on Me | Lord Bodie Q&A | Zürich International | Lord Bodie Face Reveal!
Pro Life, Small Government, Legal Immigrants, 2nd Amendment, Capitalism, Free Markets, and Equal Marriage
Abortion, Large Government, Socialism, Communism, Gun Control, Illegal Immigrants, Pro Choice, Joe Biden, Police Abolishment, and Fascism


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Peoples Republic of Joyea
Diplomat
 
Posts: 744
Founded: May 04, 2018
Corporate Police State

Postby Peoples Republic of Joyea » Fri Jul 10, 2020 9:29 am

Image
To: Cannibal Cafe
From: Joyean Ministry of Health and Public Services, Ministry of Foreign Affairs of Joyea, Ministry of Economy and Economic Development, an the Joyean Ministry of Defense
Re: Sanctions & Trade Restrictions

The Government of the Peoples Republic of Joyea condemns these acts if savagery. We will cut any and all economic, military, and political relations due to this business. We be placing sanctions on your nation prohibiting any and all sales of any Joyean products to your nation. If this continues expect a military action to save people who would have otherwise been consumed by patrons of this horrible "business".
Joyean Military Industries (Defense Company):
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=485669
Joyeah City International Airport:
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=471451
Air Joyea
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=472304

Proud police supporter
Incumbent General Secretary: Joyeah Andreyev
Incumbent Party Chairman: John Goodchild

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Empirical Switzerland
Senator
 
Posts: 3831
Founded: Feb 27, 2020
Ex-Nation

Postby Empirical Switzerland » Fri Jul 10, 2020 9:40 am

The Cannibal Cafe isn't actually cannibal, it is food fashioned to look and taste like human meat for fun. Not ACTUAL human meat, I may have misconveyed that, I am sorry, and will fix it
News: Swiss Man uses 'Fonduethrower' on cow test-subject, lethality confirmed, Priest gets drunk on Blood of Christ, claims he just couldn't handle the Jesusness, and War with Tupeia deemed 'inevitable'.

Click to Declare War on Me | Lord Bodie Q&A | Zürich International | Lord Bodie Face Reveal!
Pro Life, Small Government, Legal Immigrants, 2nd Amendment, Capitalism, Free Markets, and Equal Marriage
Abortion, Large Government, Socialism, Communism, Gun Control, Illegal Immigrants, Pro Choice, Joe Biden, Police Abolishment, and Fascism


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The Grandest Empire
Civil Servant
 
Posts: 10
Founded: Sep 06, 2019
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby The Grandest Empire » Mon Oct 26, 2020 11:41 am

I don't want to know what the Weiner Sausage is made out of.
Hello! My name is The Grandest Empire, you are free to TG me whenever you feel like it.

My 9axe results
My RightValues results
My Personality

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Nova Kartago
Envoy
 
Posts: 304
Founded: Mar 17, 2020
New York Times Democracy

Postby Nova Kartago » Mon Oct 26, 2020 12:37 pm

As a member of IFTC you are breaking the law of the organization

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