911 what's your not emergency?

[Valentine Z]

Okay, you're sus, I'm handing you over to the Police.

-----

I accidentally put strawberry jam on my wholegrain bread.

[Countesia]

Okay, you're sus, I'm handing you over to the Police.

-----

I accidentally put strawberry jam on my wholegrain bread.

Have you tried adding Peanut Butter????

---

Everytime I blink, i can't see.

[Babalabuska]

Just don't blink sir.

---

Help, there's Amogus everywhere!
sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus sus

[GruffyRichard and HillbillyBob]

Too bad. Nothing i can do about that, sorry sir
---------------------------------------------------
help i dont know 1+1

[Nooooooooooooooo]

Please don't call if there is no emergency. Where are your parents?


Halp me i am poor

[Trenaka]

Just have money.

The pizza place hasn’t delivered my pizza

[Silvedania]

That seems like a serious emergency. No one should have their right to a gooey cheese pizza with extra cheese taken away. What? You didn't specify what type of pizza it was? Uhh...

---

My dog went on a date with a poodle. A poodle!

[Alaska Hawaii and the Aleutes]

He is not your dog anymore, so don't bother
-
I don't have any tea left and now I'm sad

[Drew Durrnil]

You steal some of course

---

Someone ate me!

[Nooooooooooooooo]

Then move his bowels around until he throws you up

Halp me i put pineapples on pizza pringles am i addicted

[Alaska Hawaii and the Aleutes]

Yes, you are, quick, eat some lettuce!

why life so strange

[North Cromch]

Pizza Pringles? Pizza Pringles?? Are you kidding me??? And yes, you're addicted.

I can't seem to find Gromit!

[Alaska Hawaii and the Aleutes]

Pizza Pringles? Pizza Pringles?? Are you kidding me??? And yes, you're addicted.

I can't seem to find Gromit!

Find Wallace first!

Why do some people hate potatoes?

[Cokoland]

I've never seen anyone saying they "hate" potatoes.

---

Help, a man has fallen into the river in lego city!

[Nooooooooooooooo]

Build the rescue helicopter!


Help me, I broke apart my insides

[Silvedania]

I'll call Doctor Phil to see if he can help.

---

I have a piano lesson in 20 seconds and it's all the way in the living room and I'm in my bedroom. How can I get there in time?

[Babalabuska]

Noclip through the floor.

---

Help, this guy is hacking in my Minecraft server!

[GruffyRichard and HillbillyBob]

Set his permission to visitor, and teleport him to the top of a large pit filled with cobwebs and at the bottom fill it with lava.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Help help my sister is in love with me

[Silvedania]

Give her a boozy love potion so she falls in love with your twin brother instead. I here Ol' Grindy has some at the shop. Hither fast young soul, Me thinks the wolves are out tonight.

---

Pleaseth help me young 'un. Tis words from my food hole are of the Elizabethan type.

[Nooooooooooooooo]

Ok boomer, why don't you just go watch murder she wrote


Halpings, I am permanent into talking like polan

[GruffyRichard and HillbillyBob]

Flip your flag you talk like indonesia
-------------------------------------------------
help i am enslaved my by daughter

[Astolfotopia]

Would you like to sign up to voice polandball comics for the rest of your life?
Ninja'd

Just unenslave her lol

I accidentally cooked and ate my roommate

[Alaska Hawaii and the Aleutes]

Would you like to sign up to voice polandball comics for the rest of your life?
Ninja'd

Just unenslave her lol

I accidentally cooked and ate my roommate

Don't spit her out

I accidentally formed a Socialist Micronation, wrote the UN and now for some reason I'm followed by the CIA

[Railroad Crossing]

AlTeRnAtE hIsToRy

i spilled water on my pants and now everyone thinks i did a pp

[Arcaeas]

Keep going, you're doing great, comrade.

Got ninja'd, whoops: The only things you can do now are either to leave or actually piss yourself
-

Help, I'm being attacked by a crow.