Bill Maher on sexual harassment

[LimaUniformNovemberAlpha]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WiYudywr_tQ

So recently Bill Maher pointed out the nuances to sexual harassment, and contrast between people's supposed views on sexual harassment and the media they choose to consume. I feel like this has channeled what I've been trying to say for years.

A few choice quotes:

"Men made most of these movies, but women bought most of the tickets." (25sec in)

"Not every guy who makes a woman feel uncomfortable did it because he's an asshole." (1min in)

"This is what women want; but only from the men they want it from. Problem is, we don't know which one we are." (2min in)

The first especially stands out to me... by what standard does one blame Hollywood, when they're only catering to consumer demand?

I am, for what it's worth, a little uneasy with Bill's criticism of the "you can only ask this co-worker out once" rule. If one no is not enough, what is?

But as for workplace dating itself, more generally, I can see the appeal of that. You're with someone you're going to be with anyway for a good chunk of the day, someone you've already gotten to know beforehand, before they've had a chance to misrepresent themselves. The only other context I can think of in which that generally applies is if you're staying with your high school girlfriend... which can be pretty career-limiting since it's unlikely you'll both get transferred to the same town. And that's before you get into the fact that just by dating her in high school at all, you're tempting yourself to have sex, risking having to drop out to pay child support...

[Thermodolia]

What is with you and your urge to create so many damn threads?

[Hurdergaryp]

What is with you and your urge to create so many damn threads?

How else can one dominate the scourged wastelands of NationStates General?

[Thermodolia]

What is with you and your urge to create so many damn threads?

How else can one dominate the scourged wastelands of NationStates General?

By not giving a shit?

[Hurdergaryp]

How else can one dominate the scourged wastelands of NationStates General?

By not giving a shit?

No, that's just a survival mechanism.

[Hirota]

But as for workplace dating itself, more generally, I can see the appeal of that.

I was once given a piece of advice which I always thought relevant. It was "don't shit where you eat." Keep the two separate, and having seen more than a couple of relationships break down at work where it eventually led to one or both of them leaving the company, it seems to have been good advice.

by what standard does one blame Hollywood, when they're only catering to consumer demand?

I can't imagine what consumer demand you are referring to. I think there is a difference between what happens in a consensual relationship and what is alleged goes on in hollywood - but it's not quite as black and white as some make out.

[Thermodolia]

By not giving a shit?

No, that's just a survival mechanism.

I didn’t think you could do anything other than attempt to survive in NSG

[Des-Bal]

But as for workplace dating itself, more generally, I can see the appeal of that.

I was once given a piece of advice which I always thought relevant. It was "don't shit where you eat." Keep the two separate, and having seen more than a couple of relationships break down at work where it eventually led to one or both of them leaving the company, it seems to have been good advice.

by what standard does one blame Hollywood, when they're only catering to consumer demand?

I can't imagine what consumer demand you are referring to.

Work is the second most common place to meet your spouse.

[Hirota]

I was once given a piece of advice which I always thought relevant. It was "don't shit where you eat." Keep the two separate, and having seen more than a couple of relationships break down at work where it eventually led to one or both of them leaving the company, it seems to have been good advice.

I can't imagine what consumer demand you are referring to.

Work is the second most common place to meet your spouse.

I wonder if there is a correlative factor in the number of divorces?

Edit: huh, apparently not.

[Thermodolia]

I was once given a piece of advice which I always thought relevant. It was "don't shit where you eat." Keep the two separate, and having seen more than a couple of relationships break down at work where it eventually led to one or both of them leaving the company, it seems to have been good advice.

I can't imagine what consumer demand you are referring to.

Work is the second most common place to meet your spouse.

Though I would advise against workplace dating, especially if you work in the same department

[LimaUniformNovemberAlpha]

I can't imagine what consumer demand you are referring to.

Not sure where you're going with that, but I was referring to the fact that companies have to compete to meet consumer demand. Sometimes the consumer might be just as wrong to want what they want... but they still go for it. Actions speak louder than words.

I think there is a difference between what happens in a consensual relationship and what is alleged goes on in hollywood - but it's not quite as black and white as some make out.

I wasn't referring to what goes on behind the scenes. At least not in this context.

[Petrasylvania]

What is with you and your urge to create so many damn threads?

At least it's not an inane hypothetical moral dilemma exercise or a just as inane sermon on how anything can be made better by monetizing it.

[Petrasylvania]

Frankly it's on an individual basis. Some women do enjoy seeking out supposed alpha males, others only indulge in escapism and would probably punch out from the presence on an overtly aggressive male. And keep in mind this only covers cishet women.

[Senkaku]

"Not every guy who makes a woman feel uncomfortable did it because he's an asshole." (1min in)

"This is what women want; but only from the men they want it from. Problem is, we don't know which one we are." (2min in)[/i]

These are both really good points, and I agree on your uncomfortableness regarding his criticism of the "ask them out once" rule- but I just don't think society, as polarized as it is, is really ready to try and find a nuanced middle ground here (or anywhere) right now. The battle lines have been drawn up on each side, and trying to examine the actual complexities of the subject is going to become even harder. We're just not equipped to have that kind of conversation.

[Katganistan]

Work is the second most common place to meet your spouse.

Though I would advise against workplace dating, especially if you work in the same department

True that.

Different departments, if one must. Certainly not your direct superior/employee.

I simply don't because I've seen such relationships fall apart, and then it's fodder for the rumor/gossip mill.

[Katganistan]

What is with you and your urge to create so many damn threads?

At least it's not an inane hypothetical moral dilemma exercise or a just as inane sermon on how anything can be made better by monetizing it.

[Senkaku]

What is with you and your urge to create so many damn threads?

At least it's not an inane hypothetical moral dilemma exercise or a just as inane sermon on how anything can be made better by monetizing it.

b l e s s

[Benuty]

No, that's just a survival mechanism.

I didn’t think you could do anything other than attempt to survive in NSG

You can overthrow it, and force it to submit to the madness of chaos.

[The Parkus Empire]

Women sometimes love that stuff from the right guy, yep. But that doesn't make it okay as a general rule. It's wrong by default, the possibility of a woman being turned on by it doesn't make it ethical

[The Parkus Empire]

It must also be noted that women can be simultaneously uncomfortable and turned on. Therefore the crition of "it's justified if it turns her on, " is not correct.

[Greed and Death]

Though I would advise against workplace dating, especially if you work in the same department

True that.

Different departments, if one must. Certainly not your direct superior/employee.

I simply don't because I've seen such relationships fall apart, and then it's fodder for the rumor/gossip mill.

But that is what subordinates are for.
My proof.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-6QnKuJs5o

[Costa Fierro]

I am, for what it's worth, a little uneasy with Bill's criticism of the "you can only ask this co-worker out once" rule. If one no is not enough, what is?

Better yet, don't ask your coworkers out. All your doing is asking for trouble, especially if the relationship falls apart or from "unwanted advances/harassment", especially if you are interested in a woman who is lower in the hierarchy than you are.

But as for workplace dating itself, more generally, I can see the appeal of that. You're with someone you're going to be with anyway for a good chunk of the day, someone you've already gotten to know beforehand, before they've had a chance to misrepresent themselves.

Not true at all. You're not going to get to know someone until you're in a relationship with them.

[Pope Joan]

True that.

Different departments, if one must. Certainly not your direct superior/employee.

I simply don't because I've seen such relationships fall apart, and then it's fodder for the rumor/gossip mill.

But that is what subordinates are for.
My proof.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-6QnKuJs5o

[VoVoDoCo]

True that.

Different departments, if one must. Certainly not your direct superior/employee.

I simply don't because I've seen such relationships fall apart, and then it's fodder for the rumor/gossip mill.

But that is what subordinates are for.
My proof.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-6QnKuJs5o

Sorry if this is off topic but

Did they make new seasons of Dilbert?! That was my favorite show, and I could've sworn I'd seen all of them.

[VoVoDoCo]

What is with you and your urge to create so many damn threads?

And s(he) never sticks to them very long. It seems like they'll post one or two times and call it quits.