NationStates Issues **SPOILER ALERT**

[Rocain Founder]

Here is the text to option 3 of issue #685 (currently spoiled as TBD), as received by my puppet Cain M Inv v0. Differences from option 2 are underlined. I have made no attempt to macroize the proper name.

“They aren’t going to respond to that! They don’t care if their own citizens drop dead in the fields; they’re cynical profiteers who only care about the bottom line!” fumes Guinan Weatherhead, the Minister of Trade and Industry. “This sort of thing is exactly why we refuse to trade with other nations. We should pressure all their allies and major trade partners to do the same with them. That’ll teach them!”

The text makes it pretty clear this option is for nations with the Autarky policy. Option 2, which my puppet did not receive, is pretty clearly the non-Autarky alternative.

[Valentine Z]

I'm still alive on GI, have been lurking and reading through your posts since my last change log.

I'll do more edits and the like hopefully by this weekend. It's been a bit eventful and busy! <3

[Rocain Founder]

Here is issue #1502, as received by my puppet Cain A R-O Au v1. I have made no attempt to resolve names, though I suspect that the name Natas, being Satan reversed, is constant.

Dirty Deals

The Issue

Corporations from the United Federation have offered to pay your nation to take care of their garbage.

The Debate

1. “I’m sure you’ll fahnd this here business proposal’s in yer beyust interest, pardner,” suggests Mr. Natas, the CEO of Got Garbage? Inc., lifting his 20-gallon hat over his star-shaped rose-tinted sunglasses. “You’ve got the supplah— of space that iyus, and we’ve got the demayund. Just sahn here, if you would please.”

2. “Don’t you dare sign a deal with this devil,” frantically warns your Minister of Skepticism, holding a magnifying glass up to the contract. “Our coastlines are delicate enough without the addition of some foreigner’s pizza boxes, broken glass, and literal **** floating around in them. Publicly condemn this practice and threaten trade sanctions against any nation that engages in exporting OR importing waste products.”

4. “There’s a way to satisfy both eco-friendliness and profit,” suggests your Financial Minister, who appears to be going through your wastepaper basket for any unwanted paperclips. “They’re actually going to pay us to take this precious resource! Think about it — we could sift out reusable items and recyclable materials from careless, lazy foreigners, and then sell it back to those same bums for profit! Along the way, we generate a multitude of jobs for skilled workers, especially those with small, nimble, fast hands, like all those unemployed six-to-twelve year olds who could be making money for their families. Which is a good thing, right?”

Issue by The Bureaudirectic Union of Jutsa

Edited by Candlewhisper Archive

Inspection of the HTML shows there is a missing option between the 2nd option and the last, which I indicated by giving the final option the number 4, even though it was displayed to my puppet as option 3.

[Trotterdam]

I notice that the puppet you got it on has Child Labor, which seems relevant given the text of the last option.

[Jutsa]

Can confirm I got option 3.

“There’s a way to satisfy both eco-friendliness and profit,” suggests your Financial Minister, who appears to be going through your wastepaper basket for any unwanted paperclips. “They’re actually going to pay us to take this precious resource! Think about it — we could sift out reusable items and recyclable materials from careless, lazy foreigners, and then sell it back to those same bums for profit! Along the way, we generate a multitude of jobs for skilled workers, especially those with small, nimble, fast hands, like all those unemployed six-to-twelve year olds who could be making money for their families. Which is a good thing, right?”

I imagine child labor's the policy at play there, although I'm not certain. Many thanks for reporting this, and incredibly many thanks for CWA (and I believe at least one other editor) for working on this. <3

[Rocain Founder]

Can confirm I got option 3.

“There’s a way to satisfy both eco-friendliness and profit,” suggests your Financial Minister, who appears to be going through your wastepaper basket for any unwanted paperclips. “They’re actually going to pay us to take this precious resource! Think about it — we could sift out reusable items and recyclable materials from careless, lazy foreigners, and then sell it back to those same bums for profit! Along the way, we generate a multitude of jobs for skilled workers, especially those with small, nimble, fast hands, like all those unemployed six-to-twelve year olds who could be making money for their families. Which is a good thing, right?”

Since this text is identical to the text for option 4, I have to ask: you did verify from the HTML that you got the actual option 3? (since if you get the actual option 4 it ends up numbered in the user presentation as option 3)

[Jutsa]

Yup! It was internally coded as 2. In fact, I thought there were only 0,1,2 until your report.

[Rocain Founder]

As predicted by this post, issue #94 has a new option, inserted between options 2 and 3 of the old (spoiled) version of this issue. Regrettably, the puppet that received this issue (Cain EF v1) did not receive the new option 3, only the previously spoiled options 1, 2 and 4.

According to this post, the new option 3 is a doppelganger for option 2, for nations which disallow elections. As noted above, its text is unknown to me at this time.

[Rocain Founder]

Issue #653 has a new option 3, discovered by my puppet Cain G HiK Cmp v0. It appears to be a doppleganger of the spoiled option 2, for nations without computers or the internet. (See this post.) The text of the option appears to be identical to the spoiled text for option 2, but the talking point is different.

To be completely explicit, here is the text of option 3, as received by my puppet.

“You can’t do that!” gasps Dr. Claude Borel, a member of the international non-governmental organization Doctors Without Quarters, who’s been crashing in one of your guest bedrooms for the past few weeks. “In a few years, our program may be able to eradicate Spoon Pox entirely. And it’s not just Spoon Pox... we’ve been vaccinating against other preventable diseases too, like Yellow Tongue and the dreaded Bendy Creaks. Your deceptions risk the credibility of all international medical aid efforts, and could set public health back by decades!”

The talking point is "the @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Intelligence Agency relies on rumour and guidebooks to know what is happening overseas".

[Jutsa]

Aight, finally got around to answering issues on my alt with the MADness chain again (after realizing it turned capitalist already without me realizing lol).

In trying to figure out how to get 1378.5 specifically, I believe I have an idea as to how it works. I suspect that the first three options take you to 1379 and the next three options take you to 1380.

Regarding the difference, my only guesses are a) what option you chose at the very beginning of the chain (1375 1/3/5), or how strong your military stat is. I've gone with option 2 since it seems like the stupid option that deserves more punishment; we'll see hopefully in the next few days depending on how fast I answer these. (Edit: Forgot to note that this particular nation is top 13% or so for military.)

Also, can I just point out that this really dated quickly:

I’m sure you have heard that East Lebatuck, our largest neighbor, has become rather menacing and hostile recently. Their military has been conducting frequent ‘training exercises’ right next to the border. The next thing you know, they’ll be storming our cities with their tanks!

ed2: keep thinking it's 1975 for some reason. I wonder why.

[Trotterdam]

I suspect that the first three options take you to 1379 and the next three options take you to 1380.

Umm, yes? We've known this for a while.

The question is what determines which set of three you get.

[Jutsa]

Oh. xD Sorry, my memory on this had completely disintegrated and I was relying solely on briefly looking at past posts. Alas.

Well, fingers crossed I get option 5 anyway.

[TalAkMaChen]

Hi again, I found some places that need corrections in the latest issues listed:

1460 if opt 1 can be either gender, opt 2 should be "this deranged @@man@@"

1480, description: handful of @@currencyplural@@ left
,1 name is actually Jacquetta (same as description); spent every @@currencyplural@@ on diamond
,2 here it is the mother's name as @@randomfemalefirstname@@
,3 if I get this Bicquick commercial (italics)

1494,2: twenty-seven @@currencyplural@@, young people of @@name@@ (name is fixed)
,3 schools all across @@name@@

1496,description: @@randomname@@ can be either gender, so all are @@he@@ and @@his@@, respectively
,2 Max Barry’s Jennifer Government, (italics)

1497,description: Jamie and Jessie @@randomlastname@@
,2: Chief of Police @@randomname@@
,3 develop a soul smear test (italics)

[Giovanniland]

New issue!

#1505: A Tangled Web [Gudicia; ed: Pogaria]

The Issue

A startling new report has revealed that the @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ government’s website fails to meet even the most basic accessibility guidelines. In one case, deaf users were instructed to watch a fifteen-minute video with no subtitles in order to be eligible for government support. Following this revelation, disability rights groups are demanding action.

The Debate

1. “This is degrading!” shouts disability advocate Jane Hill, as she tries to reach a nearby microphone from her wheelchair. “Government should be designed for everyone, regardless of ability. We need to make sure that all taxpayer-funded websites are accessible for people with disabilities. How can we move forward when we leave our most vulnerable behind?”

2. “Why stop there?” questions Communications Minister and keyboard warrior Napoleon Payne, furiously typing on his phone as he steps forward. “Plenty of websites are terrible for people with disabilities. We need to establish a new internet regulator to ensure that everything on the web is accessible! Plus, it will give me — um, I mean, the government — greater control over what can go online. What’s not to love?”

4. “My dear, you mustn’t forget those of us who suffer from macular degeneration and other age-related disabilities,” interjects your grandmother, who appears to have nimbly evaded the staff from her nursing home. “How are we supposed to access government services if we can’t even read the blasted computer screens? Why not just go back to in-person service, with government offices in every town? We don’t need none of this fancy computer stuff. Some good ol’ fashioned pencil-pushing would do @@NAME@@ some good.”

Names are underlined, they feel like random names but perhaps someone else who gets the issue can confirm or deny that. Option numbers from inspect element are 0, 1, and 3, so there is a hidden option.

[Pangurstan]

New issue!

#1505: A Tangled Web [Gudicia; ed: Pogaria]

The Issue

A startling new report has revealed that the @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ government’s website fails to meet even the most basic accessibility guidelines. In one case, deaf users were instructed to watch a fifteen-minute video with no subtitles in order to be eligible for government support. Following this revelation, disability rights groups are demanding action.

The Debate

1. “This is degrading!” shouts disability advocate Jane Hill, as she tries to reach a nearby microphone from her wheelchair. “Government should be designed for everyone, regardless of ability. We need to make sure that all taxpayer-funded websites are accessible for people with disabilities. How can we move forward when we leave our most vulnerable behind?”

2. “Why stop there?” questions Communications Minister and keyboard warrior Napoleon Payne, furiously typing on his phone as he steps forward. “Plenty of websites are terrible for people with disabilities. We need to establish a new internet regulator to ensure that everything on the web is accessible! Plus, it will give me — um, I mean, the government — greater control over what can go online. What’s not to love?”

4. “My dear, you mustn’t forget those of us who suffer from macular degeneration and other age-related disabilities,” interjects your grandmother, who appears to have nimbly evaded the staff from her nursing home. “How are we supposed to access government services if we can’t even read the blasted computer screens? Why not just go back to in-person service, with government offices in every town? We don’t need none of this fancy computer stuff. Some good ol’ fashioned pencil-pushing would do @@NAME@@ some good.”

Names are underlined, they feel like random names but perhaps someone else who gets the issue can confirm or deny that. Option numbers from inspect element are 0, 1, and 3, so there is a hidden option.

I got Zaheer Hume and Darius Plantagenet, so they're random names.

[Rocain Founder]

Issue #1506 has surfaced, received by my puppet Cain BZ R02Lt v0. The issue text is interesting for not containing any proper names. Here is the text as received by my puppet.

A Need for Order

The Issue

Global politics often require you to meet with politicians from other nations, both at carefully choreographed ceremonies and state dinners, as well as during smaller and more unstructured affairs. So it is, you find yourself in a high-end @@CAPITAL@@ restaurant with the diminutive Minister of Trade from the tiny but politically significant nation of Smalltopia, along with his wife. After you have all studied the menu for a while the waiter arrives. The Smalltopian fellow orders the linguine for himself and — without even turning to look at his wife — orders the same for her. Her eyes turned downwards, she says nothing, clearly used to him taking control. The media’s cameras look to you, to see how you will respond.

The Debate

1. A dozen yards away your Minister of Pressed Curd Global Distribution is making frantic hand gestures to discourage you from commenting, and pointing to the menu to indicate that you should order the same thing. Maybe he thinks that a man ordering for a woman is just old-fashioned charm? Or perhaps he is worried that you’re going to upset the delicately negotiated bilateral cheese export deal he closed just before dinner?

2. Shoving her way into your eyeline, your militantly feminist Minister for Equality looks frankly furious. She gesticulates angrily and glares daggers at the Smalltopian minister’s back. Looks like she thinks you ought to be making a point of checking with the timorous lady to see if she wants to order her own food.

3. At the edge of the room, strategically positioned near the exit, one of your loyal aides points to his mobile phone, asking if you want him to pretend you’ve got an urgent call that will take you away from this awkward dinner. After all, you could always rearrange this meeting some other time, in a menu-free environment. The ballet is good this year, you’ve heard.

Issue by The Intensive Care Unit of Candlewhisper Archive

Edited by Candlewhisper Archive

The HTML shows no signs of there being hidden options, though one can never rule them out.

[Jutsa]

Interesting for not containing any dialogue at that. Also just an extremely good issue.

[Umbratellus]

the delicately negotiated bilateral cheese export deal he closed just before dinner?

Can't wait for this issue now; anything to boost cheese exports.

[Trotterdam]

So was any cheese included in the controversial order?

[SherpDaWerp]

So was any cheese included in the controversial order?

I'd hope a linguine to have at least some element of cheese somewhere...

Interestingly, option 1 decreased my civil rights but not my inclusiveness, despite the provocative effect line.

[Jutsa]

Sorry, been horribly busy and feeling some kind of sick the last... well, several days especially.

Anyhow, can confirm this is what the text of #1378 option 5 reads for Authorization to Kill:

“We can’t let the commies intimidate us!” declares Defense Minister Mack Rimera, who is pouring something from a flask into his morning coffee. “If they think we’re weak, they’ll just continue trying to take advantage of us at every opportunity. Have our flagship fire a warning shot across their bows and order East Lebatuck’s ships to turn around. If the enemy doesn’t comply, open fire and unleash hell.”

I mean what else were we expecting?

I chose 1375.3 -> 1376.1 -> 1377... wait I didn't realize there was a 3 (I think it was 3 given it took me to 1378).

This nation (The Final Conglomerated Order, if you're curious[/nation]) is also top 12% for military, so it could very well have to do with the option choice since I'd think a large military would make them turn around, so I suspect giving another nation nuclear access has something to do with it... but we'll see *shrugs*

[Disgraces]

Issue 1507:

Busting to Go


The Issue
“...and thusly, this must now be considered under the sixteen sections and three hundred and twenty-four subsections of the Dunnage and Silage Act 1935, which I will now recite...” It’s been nine hours, and the undersecretary to the vice leader of the opposition isn’t done filibustering, a legislative tactic that you recently approved. Even with a flask of coffee, a plate of croissants and a well-used bucket provided to you by a thoughtful aide, this is proving to be a real trial. Surprisingly, the speaker stops for a moment and addresses you directly.

The Debate

1) “Look here, [leader], you know that I can go on like this till the end of session, and I can pick it up again tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after,” she says, almost threateningly. “Why don’t we both save ourselves some trouble and provide the option for a minority quorum of legislators to declare their intention to filibuster indefinitely without needing to actually filibuster? A virtual filibuster if you will. It recognises the need for filibusters to exist while not wasting time that you could be using on the business of government.”

2) “And that’s democracy, is it?” counters your Minister of Tyrannical Majorities, taking your bucket to pour down the sink. “We should have some mechanism to bust filibusters, perhaps with a three-fifths majority vote of legislators being enough to declare that a debate has ended, and that the vote proper should take place without further delay. That’s called cloture, boss, which I believe is foreign-talk for guillotining a blatherer’s noggin off. Metaphorically, of course!”

3) “Honestly, this whole thing is making a mockery of the legislative process,” interjects your brother, who technically isn’t allowed to be in here, and who has been throwing peanut shells at the speaker with varying degrees of accuracy for the last forty-five minutes. “If you want her to stop talking, then you need to flush her out by making her as uncomfortable as possible. Ban food, drinks and buckets on the floor and prevent the speaker from accepting points of order that conveniently give time for respite.”

4) “Chaps, this IS the system working, don’t you see?” explains an elder statesman, who has woken from a short nap, and is still wearing his nightcap. “The mechanisms of democracy have tangled the powers-that-be into blissful inaction, and befuddled the populace beneath a barrage of bureaucratic bewitchery. Politics drags on, the entire process of government is kicked to the long grass, and the country prospers because old fools like us don’t try to run things. Just sit back, listen, relax. The decades will fly by, and before you know it you’ll be retiring to the quango, cushy corporate advisory role or tropical island of your choice.” A black cat walks past and for a moment you experience a weird sense of déjà vu.

[Disgraces]

Issue 1507:

Busting to Go


The Issue
“...and thusly, this must now be considered under the sixteen sections and three hundred and twenty-four subsections of the Dunnage and Silage Act 1935, which I will now recite...” It’s been nine hours, and the undersecretary to the vice leader of the opposition isn’t done filibustering, a legislative tactic that you recently approved. Even with a flask of coffee, a plate of croissants and a well-used bucket provided to you by a thoughtful aide, this is proving to be a real trial. Surprisingly, the speaker stops for a moment and addresses you directly.

The Debate

1) “Look here, [leader], you know that I can go on like this till the end of session, and I can pick it up again tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after,” she says, almost threateningly. “Why don’t we both save ourselves some trouble and provide the option for a minority quorum of legislators to declare their intention to filibuster indefinitely without needing to actually filibuster? A virtual filibuster if you will. It recognises the need for filibusters to exist while not wasting time that you could be using on the business of government.”

2) “And that’s democracy, is it?” counters your Minister of Tyrannical Majorities, taking your bucket to pour down the sink. “We should have some mechanism to bust filibusters, perhaps with a three-fifths majority vote of legislators being enough to declare that a debate has ended, and that the vote proper should take place without further delay. That’s called cloture, boss, which I believe is foreign-talk for guillotining a blatherer’s noggin off. Metaphorically, of course!”

3) “Honestly, this whole thing is making a mockery of the legislative process,” interjects your brother, who technically isn’t allowed to be in here, and who has been throwing peanut shells at the speaker with varying degrees of accuracy for the last forty-five minutes. “If you want her to stop talking, then you need to flush her out by making her as uncomfortable as possible. Ban food, drinks and buckets on the floor and prevent the speaker from accepting points of order that conveniently give time for respite.”

4) “Chaps, this IS the system working, don’t you see?” explains an elder statesman, who has woken from a short nap, and is still wearing his nightcap. “The mechanisms of democracy have tangled the powers-that-be into blissful inaction, and befuddled the populace beneath a barrage of bureaucratic bewitchery. Politics drags on, the entire process of government is kicked to the long grass, and the country prospers because old fools like us don’t try to run things. Just sit back, listen, relax. The decades will fly by, and before you know it you’ll be retiring to the quango, cushy corporate advisory role or tropical island of your choice.” A black cat walks past and for a moment you experience a weird sense of déjà vu.

Second option:

Gangs of political bullies tell minority voices to "shut up because we say so".

[Jutsa]

You didn't happen to have an author and editor, by any chance?

Although I know who the author is... and I must say this is another one I'm extremely happy to see added to the game.

It's Candlewhisper Archive in case you didn't see the drafting phase. ;p curious who edited it

[Disgraces]

You didn't happen to have an author and editor, by any chance?

Although I know who the author is... and I must say this is another one I'm extremely happy to see added to the game.

It's Candlewhisper Archive in case you didn't see the drafting phase. ;p curious who edited it

I didn't check, sorry