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A place to spoil daily issues for those who haven't had them yet, snigger at typos, and discuss ideas for new ones.

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Trotterdam
Senator
 
Posts: 4458
Founded: Jan 12, 2012
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Trotterdam » Fri Mar 17, 2017 6:03 pm

Drasnia wrote:Thanks! Keep your eyes out for new options and changes especially in regards to capitalism/communism options. CWA has been going through and doing a huge review so there's bound to be a wealth of new additions.
I am pretty confident that they include at least #060 and #511 (though in the latter it might only be the effect line). Other likely candidates include #352 and #629.

I might be able to zero in in more detail once I've seen #691 (which I'm thinking is likely to be this, but only one of the effect lines made it through unchanged), but even then there's some lines I can't easily associate with any issue.

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Mironus
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 22
Founded: Jul 10, 2006
Psychotic Dictatorship

Postby Mironus » Fri Mar 17, 2017 11:58 pm

Trotterdam wrote:Did you get that instead of or in addition to the existing options?

Only got options 1 and 4. Both of which have mostly negative effects on this nation, so it's an another one for the dismiss list. Ah well.
Last edited by Mironus on Sat Mar 18, 2017 12:00 am, edited 2 times in total.

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Tinhampton
Minister
 
Posts: 3225
Founded: Oct 05, 2016
Anarchy

Postby Tinhampton » Mon Mar 20, 2017 3:58 pm

It's been 12 days since I last reported an issue, and we've seen 11 of them since. Not too shabby, and we'll probably get to the magic 700 mark this week.
Issue #696: No, Minister

The Issue
The recently published memoirs of a retired senior civil servant have caused an uproar with their claims that it is the Civil Service, not the government, that runs the country.

The Debate
  1. “I’m afraid the book is right,” sighs government Minister Jem Hacker. “It’s been the case for decades that unelected Civil Service clowns are the ones who really run this circus. We make policy, but they twist it and turn us around with tricks and paperwork till they end up doing whatever they want to. Accountability - that’s the key! I suggest that to work for government, you must be democratically elected. This should be true whether you’re a minister or a departmental bureaucrat. Once accountable to the people, the Civil Service will shape up!”
  2. “Not the right approach!” yells gruff union leader Brian Butcher, munching a shortcrust pastry and patting his rounded belly. “Trim the fat from the system, and put money back in the pocket of the working man! Shift a goodly portion of the Civil Service budget into the welfare budget, and you’ll be helpin’ the bloody poor, not the bloody bureaucrats!”
  3. “Shocking, leader, shocking,” murmurs civil servant Humphrey Pearby. “I absolutely agree with you about the Civil Service, and understand your instructions perfectly! I will immediately establish a Department of Civil Service Budget Oversight Committee for the Investigation of Pecuniary Distribution. Leave it to me, I will get the ball rolling, immediately! That is what you are saying isn’t it? Yes, Minister?”
Issue by The Peripatetic Panopticon of Candlewhisper Archive
Edited by Helaw
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Drasnia
Minister
 
Posts: 2250
Founded: Feb 02, 2012
Anarchy

Postby Drasnia » Mon Mar 20, 2017 10:35 pm

As I was working on editing this, I found that option 4 of #682 has not been reported. Keep your eyes out for it. I don't know what the validity for it would be.

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Drasnia
Minister
 
Posts: 2250
Founded: Feb 02, 2012
Anarchy

Postby Drasnia » Mon Mar 20, 2017 11:39 pm

The thread has been update to #690. I'm waiting for #691 to show up which requires instituting serfdom after the issue was released. If nobody gets it within about a week or so, I'll get all the remaining reported issues.

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Gnejs
Issues Editor
 
Posts: 2237
Founded: May 11, 2006
New York Times Democracy

Postby Gnejs » Tue Mar 21, 2017 3:02 am

Allowing parts of your nation to secede. The follow-up for serfdom was earlier. A grand total of 13 nations have answered that issue, so might take a while.

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Pencil Sharpeners 2
Envoy
 
Posts: 212
Founded: Aug 21, 2015
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby Pencil Sharpeners 2 » Tue Mar 21, 2017 1:16 pm

Issue 682 Option 4:
“Comrade, the problem here is that the Workers are not cooperating, like good Socialists should,” observes Party Member Warwick al-Assad. “Require all of our Comrade-Citizens to carpool to a vehicle’s capacity, and you will more than halve the number of vehicles on the road.”

I imagine there's going to be a lot of communist options to be added to old issues dues to this huge edit.
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Iguanarctica
Civil Servant
 
Posts: 6
Founded: Jun 22, 2014
New York Times Democracy

Postby Iguanarctica » Tue Mar 21, 2017 1:48 pm

Issue 692 Option 2:
“We don’t need draconian regulations just because one idiot didn’t read the instructions,” rebuffs avid drone enthusiast Django Nelson, while using a drone to film the meeting. “By that logic we should ban microwaves, just because one person thought it was a fun idea to stick their head inside to see what would happen. It is the right of every citizen to enjoy everything drones have to offer. Besides, strict rules would blow drone sales out of the sky.”
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Trotterdam
Senator
 
Posts: 4458
Founded: Jan 12, 2012
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Trotterdam » Tue Mar 21, 2017 8:07 pm

#682 already had 4 options...?

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Drasnia
Minister
 
Posts: 2250
Founded: Feb 02, 2012
Anarchy

Postby Drasnia » Tue Mar 21, 2017 9:10 pm

Trotterdam wrote:#682 already had 4 options...?

The report had options 1-3 and 5 so either it has 5 options with the fourth missing or the person making the report made a mistake.

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Trotterdam
Senator
 
Posts: 4458
Founded: Jan 12, 2012
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Trotterdam » Wed Mar 22, 2017 1:41 am

So it has. I missed that. Thanks.

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Drasnia
Minister
 
Posts: 2250
Founded: Feb 02, 2012
Anarchy

Postby Drasnia » Wed Mar 22, 2017 1:29 pm

Updated to #696 which was the last to be reported. #691 is still out there as is #695 so keep your eyes out.

Helaw - Today at 2:36 PM
695 is going to be a fun find. Hint: It's a chained issue.
Last edited by Drasnia on Wed Mar 22, 2017 1:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Trotterdam
Senator
 
Posts: 4458
Founded: Jan 12, 2012
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Trotterdam » Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:00 pm

Ah, interesting. I'll set some beartraps and should be able to tell you which issue it's a chain of by tomorrow :)

Meanwhile, I have this:
#697 Conventional Wisdom

The Issue

While planning the party convention for your re-election campaign your advisers have come to disagree on what the overall feeling of the event should be. They have turned to their natural means of making a final decision: bothering you about it.

The Debate

1. "One word: fireworks," states @@RANDOMNAME@@, chair@@MAN/WOMAN@@ of your political party, holding a wickedly thorned rose to the light. "Banal political speeches and rhetorical niceties just aren't doing anything; the people have grown tired of it all. Come to think of it, I'm sick of it myself, and that's really saying something. We really ought to put on an honest to goodness show here. Lasers! Music! Celebrity appearances! That should really push us up in the polls - and more importantly, your opponents down." @@HE/SHE@@ bends the rose until the stem snaps.

2. "By all means, do that," sarcastically quips your Minister of Finance, @@RANDOMNAME@@. "You can give people all the bread and circuses you want, but when it comes time to follow through, no amount of flash will solve the real deficit: the deficit of trust. Give them the unvarnished truth, and spare them the unnecessary pomp and circumstance. I propose you read off a list of factual bullet points provided by mine and other departments. For example, did you know that in the last year, no fewer than 39,280 deaths have been attributed to that marshmallow bill you approved a while back? Fascinating!"

3. "WHAT?!" bellows your Secretary of Defense, @@RANDOMNAME@@. "Millions of good, decent @@DEMONYMNOUNPLURAL@@ are fearful. They face the perils of globalism and an uncertain world order. Now's our chance to show @@NAME@@ what a REAL leader does in a time of crisis. Ride into the convention atop a tank, at the spearhead of a full armored vehicle convoy. Mount a three-story tall podium draped in a giant @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ flag, and promise our people the world!" @@HE/SHE@@ pauses for a moment as a vaulting grin creeps up @@HIS/HER@@ face. "Literally!"

Issue by Libertypendence Park
Edited by Ransium
Note: I'm note actually sure if option 1 is gender-neutral (the one I got was male), but we have the macro for it now, so...

This was in a nation that had banned fireworks, incidentally. I don't think that's tracked as a flag. (This issue uses the word more metaphorically, anyway.)

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Ransium
Issues Moderator
 
Posts: 3281
Founded: Oct 17, 2006
New York Times Democracy

Postby Ransium » Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:05 pm

Gender is neutral in 1. I interpreted the fireworks as metaphorical (at least for nations that banned fireworks).
Last edited by Ransium on Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Trotterdam
Senator
 
Posts: 4458
Founded: Jan 12, 2012
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Trotterdam » Wed Mar 22, 2017 11:45 pm

Drasnia wrote:#691 is still out there as is #695 so keep your eyes out.
Helaw - Today at 2:36 PM
695 is going to be a fun find. Hint: It's a chained issue.
Trotterdam wrote:Ah, interesting. I'll set some beartraps and should be able to tell you which issue it's a chain of by tomorrow :)
Didn't even need that long. It's #091 option 2, "televangelists flaunt their expensive cars when they attend charity events".

Beartraps decomissioned, and here's some top-quality honey for your trouble.

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Candlewhisper Archive
Senior Issues Editor
 
Posts: 11359
Founded: Aug 28, 2015
Corporate Bordello

Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Thu Mar 23, 2017 2:05 am

Hey, this thread just broke 750000 views. Ain't that something.
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Dytarma
Ambassador
 
Posts: 1734
Founded: Nov 24, 2015
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Dytarma » Thu Mar 23, 2017 4:36 am

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:Hey, this thread just broke 750000 views. Ain't that something.

It truly is.

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Candlewhisper Archive
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Founded: Aug 28, 2015
Corporate Bordello

Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Thu Mar 23, 2017 11:14 am

You know what else is something?

We just added Issue 700 to the game. :clap:

And it is really great. I'd go as far as to call in poetry, in fact.

However, it's been chained from an old issue, so let's see how long it takes for you guys to find it.
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Helaw
Issues Editor
 
Posts: 908
Founded: Aug 03, 2016
Authoritarian Democracy

Postby Helaw » Thu Mar 23, 2017 11:21 am

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:However, it's been chained from an old issue, so let's see how long it takes for you guys to find it.


Judging by how long it took Trotterdam to find #695 after I hinted that it was a chained issue, less than twenty four hours.
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Trotterdam
Senator
 
Posts: 4458
Founded: Jan 12, 2012
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Trotterdam » Thu Mar 23, 2017 11:45 am

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:And it is really great. I'd go as far as to call in poetry, in fact.
Literally. It's this one.

Unfortunately, the only one I've seen answering it yet is Ransium himself just now, who got it without meeting the normal prerequisites due to being the author, so I'll need another sighting or two before I can confirm the validity. Though, the draft in that thread offers a pretty good suggestion (#161 option 1, "the government seizes the property of the recently deceased"), I doubt it was changed from that.

Also I think there's something about guns and something about plumbing?

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Lord Dominator
Chargé d'Affaires
 
Posts: 408
Founded: Dec 22, 2016
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Lord Dominator » Thu Mar 23, 2017 11:51 am

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:so let's see how long it takes for you guys to find it.

39 minutes ( or less) seems to be the answer to this.
Edit: I also reported the effect line that I found on Ransium in the fix old issues thread, since it seemed a bit off. And found out it's not wrong :oops:
Last edited by Lord Dominator on Thu Mar 23, 2017 12:11 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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North Isseggggnignigsegigisegggg Islands
Envoy
 
Posts: 310
Founded: Sep 19, 2016
Liberal Democratic Socialists

Issue 699: Pipe Down, Already!

Postby North Isseggggnignigsegigisegggg Islands » Thu Mar 23, 2017 12:53 pm

The Issue

Residents across your nation have been poisoned due to dangerous levels of lead in the drinking water. A particularly vocal quartet have arrived to tell you how they think you should handle the problem.
The Debate

1. “The government needs to fix our pipes!” shouts @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@, a mother of four children, as she shows you the image of her teary-eyed youngsters shaking their empty Princess Sparkle-@@ANIMAL@@ water tumblers. “Look at this report. Those old lead pipes are corroding and it is leaking into our homes. I cannot give this poisonous water to my daughters! Not only does it taste disgusting, it’s also a health hazard. You have to get rid of the old pipes and install new ones! Think of the children!”
[Effect] Families waiting for delayed pipe installations hope daily for rain.

2. “What’s this woman prattling about?” huffs @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, your notoriously penny-pinching Treasury Minister, squeezing a pound until it cuts his palm. “Everyone knows that lead’s not dangerous. It’s good for you. I heard it just this morning on talk-radio. As your body absorbs healthful lead, it seeps into your bones, makes them stronger, and works to protect against the carcinogens of environmental radiation. What we need, @@LEADER@@, is an extensive campaign to tell everyone the alternative facts about the many benefits of lead: posters, TV ads, catchy tunes...you name it.”

5. “Replacing the pipes would be so expensive, Dear @@LEADER@@. Fortunately, we can provide for the water needs of the whole Republic.” asserts @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@, Manager of The Glorious @@NAME@@ Water Bottling Plant, as she pours some of Mother @@NAME@@’s slightly-cloudy product into a shot-glass. “With increased funding for advertisements, we will teach that all good @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@ have a duty to buy our pricey...reasonable product, as sparking as a mountain stream.” Wincing slightly, she takes a sip from her glass.

6. “Let’s just add synthetic EthyleneDiamineTetraAcetic Acid to the water we’ve got!” giggles chemist @@RANDOMMALENAME@@ giddily, unaware of the blank looks everyone in the room is giving him. “Oh, for crying out glayven. It’s so simple that any child of five, with an advanced degree in chemical engineering, would understand. By giving the whole population preventative chelation therapy, we can guarantee everyone can drink the water, without wasting valuable time and money on repairing pipes or bringing in fresh water. And sure, a few people might get minor side effects, such as heart palpitations, nausea, fatigue, blood clots, and death. But most people will be fine. Probably. So if you could just sign here...”

Issue by The Colony of British Wassoulea

Edited by The Free Joy State
Last edited by North Isseggggnignigsegigisegggg Islands on Fri Mar 24, 2017 5:49 am, edited 4 times in total.

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Ransium
Issues Moderator
 
Posts: 3281
Founded: Oct 17, 2006
New York Times Democracy

Postby Ransium » Thu Mar 23, 2017 1:53 pm

Trotterdam wrote:
Candlewhisper Archive wrote:And it is really great. I'd go as far as to call in poetry, in fact.
Literally. It's this one.

Unfortunately, the only one I've seen answering it yet is Ransium himself just now, who got it without meeting the normal prerequisites due to being the author, so I'll need another sighting or two before I can confirm the validity. Though, the draft in that thread offers a pretty good suggestion (#161 option 1, "the government seizes the property of the recently deceased"), I doubt it was changed from that.

Also I think there's something about guns and something about plumbing?


So I know you figured out what issue it was ultimately from your involvement in drafting the issue, but what tipped you off? Did CWA's hint make you check my feed? Or had you already figured it out from seeing that there was a new effects line in the wild, and then using who got it and what the line was to connect it to my draft?
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Author of WA Resolutions: SC 221, SC 224, SC 233, and GA 403.
Issues Editor since January 20th, 2017.
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Drasnia
Minister
 
Posts: 2250
Founded: Feb 02, 2012
Anarchy

Postby Drasnia » Thu Mar 23, 2017 4:51 pm

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:You know what else is something?

We just added Issue 700 to the game. :clap:

And it is really great. I'd go as far as to call in poetry, in fact.

However, it's been chained from an old issue, so let's see how long it takes for you guys to find it.

That's amazing. We aren't even done with march and we've just about hit 50 issues since the New Year (the first issue reported in this thread in 2017 was #653). At this pace we should crack 1000 in less than two years - amazing!

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Trotterdam
Senator
 
Posts: 4458
Founded: Jan 12, 2012
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Trotterdam » Thu Mar 23, 2017 7:24 pm

Ransium wrote:So I know you figured out what issue it was ultimately from your involvement in drafting the issue, but what tipped you off? Did CWA's hint make you check my feed? Or had you already figured it out from seeing that there was a new effects line in the wild, and then using who got it and what the line was to connect it to my draft?
The latter. Maybe Candlewhisper's hint helped me connect the dots (I don't actually remember anymore), but I definitely found the dots on my own.

By way, it being a followup of #161 option 1 confirmed by sighting on Umbran.

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