IBS X- Everything Thread (IC)

by **Avercari** » Sat Nov 07, 2015 9:03 pm

Avercari National Baseball Team Enters First Tournament!

by Jon Kalronn III

After months of rigorous training, the Avercari Cassowaries prepare for their first ever competition! Among the team's roster are the infamous Liet Twins, representing Avercari just months after charges and accusations of illegal enhancer use in Avercari's Home Sports League. At the moment, those charges are still under investigation. When asked how they felt about these accusations so shortly before such a large and momentous event in Avercari's entertainment industry, Karna Liet simply responded "We hope these heinous accusations do not get in the way in us participating in the tournament...we are deeply disgusted by these charges."

Also notable on the roster is the president of Avercari, Joel Barnum's youngest niece, Tahlee. This is young 18 year old Tahlee's first ever experience in Baseball professionally, so all of Avercari looks forward to seeing her blossom and reach her full potential in this tournament! Look for her jersey (number 101) as she proudly displays what it means to be a true, red blooded Avercarian out on the diamond! We salute you, Tahlee!

by **Lisander** » Sun Nov 08, 2015 12:33 am

Yellow Lights at Lisander Roster

The third and last game of Wildcat Shield was surprising. Arminhos endured its first defeat in pre-IBS games, getting only the second position in final table. Even opening 1-0 at 2nd inning, the team slowed and permitted Alice Bay comeback to 1-2 in 6th. The 7th inning saw four runs, 2 for each team, and after it no more. Arminhos Lost 3-4, and inside the Lockers, a harsh discussion was waged after the game. Match officials reported exchange of shoves in the lockers hallway between Theo Canterville and Martin Hansen.

It seems that Canterville and other reserves are not happy with just staying in the bullpen while more experienced players are going to the field. Coach Hiddleston said it was only a "small argument" between two young men frustrated by losing the easiest trophy of the season. "I'd be upset too, more than I am now. If it was me on the field and something like this happened, I'd be pissed." He also announced that no player will be cut, and all will be used according to the need of the team. "If any player is feeling inferior or under-utilized, should only blame their own performance. I always put the best I can on the pitch." After the interview, the team returned to the hotel, and travels on Sunday morning to Frenline Delpha. No player has posted anything on its social networks after the game. The order of the coaching staff is absolute silence about the incident.

Lisander Arminhos      0 1 0 0 0 0 2 0 0  3
Alice Bay Stars        0 0 0 0 0 2 2 0 X  4

Aristian Wildcats      0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0  0
Lorenthia Wolves       0 0 5 0 1 0 0 0 X  6

Wildcat Invitational Baseball League
Team                   Pld   W  L   RF  RA  RD 
1 Alice Bay Stars        3   3  0   15   8  +7
2 Lisander Arminhos      3   2  1   10   7  +3
3 Lorenthia Wolves       3   1  2   10   6  +4
4 Aristian Wildcats      3   0  3    4  18 −148

I'm using this preparation tournament to "polish and trim" My RP for IBS. If this is not appropriate to be here, please TG me and I'll delete.

by **Schiltzberg** » Mon Nov 09, 2015 3:28 pm

We are at Royal Dome in New Schiltzbierg, and the President of the International Baseball Slam announces:
"Ladies and gentlemen, here are your hosts!

THE FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF SCHILTZBERG"

The crowd cheers, and the flag is raised on the flagpole in the center field stands by military officers.

A voice comes in on the intercom telling the audience to calm down and direct its attention to home plate.

Standing at home plate, flanked by two military officers on either side, and one behind her hoisting the national flag, famous Schiltzbergian singer Melissa Warner pauses, and then sings the national anthem:

O Schiltzberg, you home of the fine!
Schiltzberg, land of my bloodline!
All of the beauty here to see!
Schiltzberg, I tip my hat to thee!

From forests to farmland to brilliant shore,
And still you have yet more in store!
White as a dove, for you are pure.
After all the centuries, you endure!

The crowd applauds, and shifts its attention back to the President of the International Baseball Slam, who is standing on the balcony of the press box, and is now joined by the President of Schiltzberg, Mr. James Williams. President Williams takes the microphone, and with a smile across his face says "Ladies and gentlemen..." then pauses a minute for suspense, and shouts, "LET THE GAMES BEGIN!" which is followed by heavy cheering, and fireworks.

The players run out onto the field and are announced one by one:
Starting Lineup: (Position, Name, Bats/Throws, Qualities)
SS Mark Daly (S/R, Great batting average, good fielder, good base-runner)
CF Jeff Fitzhugh (R/R, Great batting average, good power, okay fielder, good base-runner)
LF Chris Vrooman (L/L, Okay batting average, big power hitter, okay fielder)
1B Francis Thom (L/L, Great fielder, good batting average, best power hitter on the team)
RF Manual Villegaus (L/R, Bad fielder, great batting average, good power hitter)
3B Thomas Saiz (R/R, Great fielder, averaged batting average, good power hitter)
2B Bob Rutledge (R/R, Outstanding fielder, poor hitter, speedy base-runner)
C Wayne Knox (R/R, Poor hitter, but good throwing arm for nabbing base-runners)
P (insert here)

Bench:
C Oscar Gutierrez (R/R, backup catcher, okay hitter)
C Jeff Bumgarter (R/R, second backup catcher, averaged hitter)
2B/3B/SS Donald Carolan (L/R, backup infielder. Decent hitter and averaged fielder.)
DH/1B/OF Ben Parker (L/L, first choice backup outfielder. Bats as DH in the sixth spot when needed)
OF Joe Conway (L/L, okay fielder, mainly used as pinch hitter)
OF Benny Allen (R/R, poor batting average, but high power. Young hitter who strikes out a lot)

Starting Rotation: (Handedness, name, ERA, qualities)
RHP David Toups (3.48 High strikeout/high walk kind of pitcher)
RHP William McKey (3.38 Conservative pitcher who strikes out few, but can pitch long innings with few runs let in.)
LHP Henry Price (4.03 Good curveball and slider)
RHP Jorge Matos (4.18 Works the count and sometimes gets himself into a jam)
LHP Robert Paul (5.12 Off and on pitcher. Sometimes is really good, sometimes gets taken out early)

Bullpen:
RHP Doug Miller (1.28 Closing pitcher with a flaming fastball, but can only pitch one inning)
RHP Richard Wilson (3.34 Short relief pitcher who can go two to three innings)
RHP Todd Barras (2.27 Long relief pitcher with a nasty cutter and a killer fastball. Can pitch one to two innings)
LHP Joseph Crews (3.48 Specialty reliever who works really well against left-handed batters)
LHP Bryan Mercado (3.08 Long relief pitcher who can strikes out many batters. Two to three innings max)
LHP Steven Scherer (6.39 Short relief pitch who can be a starter if needed. Can go up to five innings.)

Manager: Robert Evans
Pitching Coach: Jesus Martinez
Hitting Coach: Alonzo Brawley
First Base Coach: Oscar Wiseman
Third Base Coach: Jack Ray
Bench Coach: Eric Comeaux

The local Archbishop comes out onto the balcony holding a scroll, and chants the RP Permissions, putting extra emphasis on the responses. The fans cheer.

RP Permissions

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my runscorers: Yes
Choose my lineup: No
Follow my pitching rotation: Yes
Godmod scoring events: No
RP injuries to my players: No
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Eject my players: Yes, maximum one per game, and no suspensions
Godmod other events: No
Use DH at home: Definitely not

The fans cheer especially, when they hear that designated hitters will not be used, and the entrance ceremony comes to a close.

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Tue Nov 10, 2015 8:52 am

There's the Way, Where's the Will?, Part One
Riuwiee, Abanhfleft

It was another one of those mornings for Ruslana Koppelberg. At twenty-two years old, she was at the stage in her life where she was supposed to be at her peak best, grabbing every opportunity to live life to the fullest by the throat and taking them all to their logical conclusions. Instead, Ruslana, or Smiley as she liked to be called as she always had a smile on her face back when she was young, seemed to have wasted those opportunities and was now barely making a living. But that wasn't true, to a point.

There was once a time that Smiley had been a commercial model; not a model in the walking-up-and-down-the-runway sense but in the person-you-see-in-TV-commercials sense. Smiley had been appearing in various commercials for television ever since she was eighteen, but four years later the number of projects, or "rackets" as she liked to call them, had dried up, and now she was acting as a talent agent of sorts to her other friends in the business who had gone on to better careers.

The reason why this was one of those mornings was because Smiley had woken up with a great big hangover. She had gone out with her friends to watch a Riuwiee United game, and after watching the team beat Athletic Dorfdifving 2-0 had been enough to get them all to have a night out on the town and get smashed. And now Smiley was feeling the aftermath of that all-night bender. Good night she wasn't a commercial model anymore. Now she could sit in the comfort of her own home and talk to her friends-slash-clients without them knowing that she was hungover. But that wasn't really true, as those friends were the ones she went partying with, actually.

Smiley slowly got out of bed, muttering curse after curse on whoever had managed to convince her that drinking that absinthe and vodka cocktail was good. She shuffled into her bathroom like a zombie, shuddered as she happened to look at her reflection on the mirror before swinging it open to reveal the medicine cabinet behind, shook out some aspirin from a bottle and downed it with a mouthful of water. After that she brushed her teeth, took a quick shower, and she looked at the mirror once again and judged herself freshened up enough to function today.

As Smiley walked down to the dining room, she saw that her younger brother, Japheth Koppelberg, was already at the table eating cereals. Smiley looked at the clock and saw that it was actually eleven o'clock. Two things crossed her mind at that moment: she had been too drunk to wake up until eleven in the morning, and that Japheth was eating cereals at lunchtime. She didn't know which to address first.

"How's your head?" Japheth asked as he scooped a spoonful of Sugar-O's into his mouth.

"Like it's between Luke Edwards' head and Charlie King's chest," Smiley replied as she too her seat at the table. The infamous incident between the Riuwiee defender and the Dorfdifving forward had resulted in a red card for Edwards and a penalty for Dorfdifving since it happened inside the penalty area, but luckily Karim Ansarifarid was able to save the spot kick from King and keep the clean sheet for the Blue Tribesmen.

"Yeah, I saw it too on TV," Japheth said. "Let's be honest, Luke deserved the red. Good thing Karim saved the pen, but if I was a Dorfdifving fan then I'd be fuming right now."

"Is there anything here that doesn't have half of its weight in sugar?" Smiley asked, even as she pondered reaching for the cereal anyway.

"There might be some bacon in the freezer," Japheth replied through some Sugar-Cornflakes. "I was gonna grab some bacon for lunch, but you know how I don't have any cooking ability at all. And how I hate standing next to cooking oil because it could pop and burn me."

"And you wonder why Mom never liked you." Japheth was the youngest of the Koppelbergs, and strangely for someone in his position he was far from being the most liked of the children. No one had any explanation why. The only reason why he was living with Smiley was because their mother had forced him on her.

"Fine, it's cereal for lunch then." Smiley finally poured the cereal into her bowl and prepared herself for the coming sugar rush.

"Oh, and there's some guy sleeping on the couch," Japheth added, almost as an afterthought. This caused Smiley to spit out the cornflakes in her mouth.

"What!" she said. "You mean to tell me that there's a guy sleeping on my couch this whole time, and you didn't even bother to tell me until now?"

"Well, I was trying to find the right time to say it, in my defense," Japheth said as he followed Smiley out of the dining room and into the living room. By that time Smiley had a baseball bat in her hands, ready to smack into the head of the intruder that had decided to have a long rest on her couch, in her home.

Smiley stepped as quietly as possible closer and closer to the figure on the couch, covered by an ugly red and pink quilt. She readied the bat above her head and then, using her other hand, she pulled away the quilt. "Wait!" the figure shouted, just as Smiley was about to bring down the bat on him.

Smiley had to blink twice to make sure that her eyes weren't fooling her. "Matt?" she asked.

"Yes, it's me, Smiley," the man replied. "I'm back!"

"You bastard!" Smiley said. "You gave me a great big scare back there!"

"I'm sorry, Smiles, but I had to go here, at least for the moment." Matthew Koppelberg was the eldest sibling. At thirty-four, he was already nearing puberty when Smiley had come along, and was the same age as Japheth was now when the youngest Koppelberg had been born.

"Who's he?" Japheth asked. "You know him, Smiley?"

"Of course I know him," Smiley replied. "He's my brother. He's our brother, mind you. At least before he left us with Mom for England."

"I'm sorry, Smiley," Matt said, raising his hands in surrender. "I really am. And I really want to apologize for leaving you two with Mom. But that's not the only reason why I'm here. I bet you're wondering where I've been all those years ago."

"Yeah, Matt, actually I have been wondering where you've gone after you left behind with Mom," Smiley said with more than just a hint of sarcasm.

"You want the truth or a version of it?"

"I think I want to hear your edited version. Of course I want the truth, Matt!"

"All right, Smiley, you deserve to know. After I left, I managed to get into a law school and learned how to be a stockbroker. With some friends of mine, I set up a trading firm and got rich very quick. But then that got me noticed by the RBI, and I've had to lay low for a while. Can I stay here with you, at least until it all blows over?"

"What have you been doing, Matt?" Smiley asked suspiciously.

"I've been dealing in some illegal stocks," Matt said. "Skimming funds and insider trading and all that jazz. If they find out what I did to get rich as quickly as I did, I'm toast, literally."

"What's in it for me? For us?" Smiley amended, turning to look at Japheth.

"I'll buy you coffee," Matt offered.

Smiley thought for a moment and then lowered the bat, which she was still holding up in the air. "All rightm, Matt, I'm listening," she said.

by **Frenline Delpha** » Tue Nov 10, 2015 9:42 pm

Frenline Delpha will be opening up group play against the unranked Ethane Red Stars later today. The team is already in Schiltzberg, and there is an interview with the teams leaders that will be released later this week. However, our expert analyst Bobby "Baseball" Connors is still here to break down the entire half of the tournament traveling to Frenline Delpha. He will also pick one stand-out player for each group.

Group A

This is the group that feature our co-hosts, Schiltzberg. Not only that, but it has the heavy hitters in the form of Nova Anglicana. The other two teams are both unranked, in the form of the Boatia Llamas and the Stuzemstazem Green Bulls. Not much is expected out of this team, but Scuiltzberg is looking for something to prove. Considering Nova Anglicana's early drop out in the last tournament, they have something to prove in this tournament, even for a number two seed. My prediction:

Group Winner: Schiltzberg (9-3)
Runner up: Nova Anglicana (8-4)
3rd Place: Stuzemstazem (5-7)
4th Place: Boatia (2-10)

Group B

Group B is definitely not the headliner group of the IBS. Sure, it features number eleven Coconut Isles, but no one has heard from them, so their roster still remains a mystery. The only other team to note is Shadownia. Now, I know that sounds like a new team, but it is actually just the Ridora Fruitbat Mafia of last tournament. Will the name change bring them luck? I don't know, but I don't think they'll make it to first place. I don't see Pulunia posing much of a challenge, and I don't expect much out of Torisakia either. My predictions:

Group Winner: Coconut Isles (8-4) (Wins on tiebreaker)
Runner up: Shadownia (8-4)
3rd Place: Torisakia (5-7)
4th Place: Punlunia (3-9)

Group C

This is a group to keep an eye on. While it may not have the biggest juggernauts, that honor belongs to Group E, it certainly should be interesting to watch these teams play. Abanhfleft is the strongest competitor in this group, winning third place in IBS IX. San Llera is nothing to sneeze at, however. They were dropped from the quarter-finals last year after losing two straight to Kaboomlandia. Will history repeat itself, or will San Llera die out again? My prediction:

Group Winner: Abanhfleft (10-2)
Runner up: San Llera (8-4)
3rd Place: Silvacometopia (5-7)
4th Place: Pinoyistan (1-11)

Group D

Speaking of Kaboomlandia, they advanced past the group stage as the number one overall seed. They didn't have anything to show for it, though. They lost to Abanhfleft in the third place playoff. The lucky geese have struck it rich this tournament, or so it seems. They are the only ranked team in their group. If they don't win the title for their group, something went wrong. They have no excuse. Camelone is relatively unknown, but another team, The Serbian Empire, is seeking to make a glorious return to sports. However, they seem to have hit a stumbling block. They haven't even decided who they are sending to this tournament. Not much of a start if your team doesn't even show up. Finally, Ruairikstan seems to be confused on how baseball works. They have decided to put their catcher in the outfield. Of course, the umps will inform them of their mistake, but they could save a bit of humiliation if they would figure out what the catcher actually does. Enough banter, here are my predictions:

Group Winner: Kaboomlandia (11-1)
Runner up: The Serbian Empire (7-5)
3rd Place: Ruairikstan (3-9)
4th Place: Camelone (3-9)

As promised, here is the player of the group predictions:

Group A: 1B Francis Thom (Schltzberg)

Group B: SS Doug Garongo (Shadownia)

Group C: LHP Johnson Kabebe (Abanhfleft)

Group D: DH Jose McGuire (Kaboomlandia)

by **Coconut Isle** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 2:55 am

OOC: Sorry for the late roster and no RP as of yet -- still busy with exams. Will come up with an RP in the next 48 hours

The National Baseball Team of Coconut Isle, Coconut Isle Dwarfs

Management
Supreme Overlord of Coconut Isle: Lord Gogoch V
Manager: Juju Nemar
Coach: Alphonse Lemon
Assistant Coach: Bree McGee

Style Modifier: -5 (if possible)

IC Stuff
Trigram: CIS
No designated hitter

Roster

Starting Rotation
#15 Turk Astan
#30 Flynch McFair
#45 (No Name)
#60 Daxx Zephyr
#75 Rocket Rocket

Bullpen
Long Relief
#19 Bag of Jeckish Chicken#
#40 Shiloh 1294QZ
Middle Relief
#60 Abcbcbcbcb bcb
#000 Jim Snakeoil#
Setup
#0 Richard Jaxxson
Closer
#100 Miguel Llawnpoylnygeron

Starting Lineup (in order) and Position
#1 1B - Alfonse Dragos
#3 LF - A New Dawn
#5 RF - Proton Accelerator
#7 CF - MacOS 10.2
#9 3B - Greg Gregory Gregson
#11 SS - Cow Cheese
#13 C - Calvin Coolidge#
#17 2B - Donk Zummer

RP Permissions
Everything is OK, but note that we don't have designated hitters. Assume all players are right handed in both pitch and bat.

# - Those with that sign next to their name are from the former island of Jeckish Chicken Connoisseurs, or Cocoa Island. The others are from Coconut Island, but now the two have formed a federation.

by **The Boatia** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 10:02 am

BREAKING NEWS

Boatia Player Willy Willer #17 catches Cancer and is being replaced by Bill Tom and Bill Tom will play in the #17.
Bill Tom will keep 7th in the batting lineup like Willy Willer was and will be 1st Base like Willy Willer was. The fans
helped the players make a chant to support him in his battle against cancer. Every once in a while during the Boatia
home games the chant will play and the words Support Willy Willer will show on the big screen. Everyone is praying
that he lives.

by **South Yerfilag** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 10:35 am

Arend Wat Suid-Yerfilag
SOUTH YERFILAG EAGLES
Pro Baseball Team

Representing Nation: The Republic of South Yerfilag
Trigramme: RSY
Manager: Margaretha Kierkegaard
((OOC: yes, the same one from WBC 33))
Style Mod: +2

Aanvanklike kolf orde | INITIAL BATTING ORDER

NUM	NAME	AGE	M/F	HOMETOWN	POS	THROWS	BATS
20	Adonijah Sudworth	32	M	Crystalden	CF	L	L
21	Melyssa Rush	34	F	Lochwell	3B	R	R
35	Menashsheh David	32	M	Bluehedge	SS	R	R
41	Kolleen Marchand	28	F	Crystalden	RF	R	S
56	Burton Albersnagel	26	M	Beachgate	LF	R	R
66	Mamadou Achterkamp	20	M	Praetors' Point	C	R	R
68	Jeannette Seelen	19	F	Dorport	1B	L	L
74	Chifundo Toller	22	M	Mistden	2B	R	R
(P)

Rotasie vir gooiere | PITCHING ROTATION

NUM	NAME	AGE	M/F	HOMETOWN	THROWS	BATS	ORDER
99	Chelsie Van Aalsburg	25	F	Whitemeadow	R	R	Starter
98	Christian Britton	23	M	Bluehedge	R	R	Starter
97	Amber Gorbold	20	F	Beachgate	L	L	Bullpen
96	Demelza Daube	26	F	Valbush	R	R	Bullpen
95	Raynard Rooijakkers	26	M	Lochwell	L	L	Bullpen
94	Michaela Aitken	22	F	Jancoast	R	R	Closer

Plaasvervangers | SUBSTITUTES

NUM	NAME	AGE	M/F	HOMETOWN	POS	THROWS	BATS
80	Megan Ryder	24	F	Caelum	OF	R	R
81	Jena Ansel	27	F	Prateors' Point	IF	R	R
82	Jennifer Tucker-Morse	21	F	Taylor City	OF	L	L
83	Ayotunde Masters	23	F	Praetors' Point	IF	L	L

by **Nova Anglicana** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 11:41 am

Nova Anglicana IBS X Roster

Nickname: Lions
Acronym: NOV
Style Mod (if applicable): +1

Starting Rotation (order as given)
LHP #36 Chris Keyes, 32 - features a 70 MPH, big, sweeping curve, has better control now than before, but has great stuff, looks have "Keyes to my heart" signs common at games
RHP #28 Nate Freeman, 33 - former top prospect had an inconsistent couple of years at big-league level, but has picked it up of late, devastating fastball/curve/change moves him into starting rotation
LHP #40 Brad Bryan, 31 - tall, slim frame with long arms, hides ball very well, nasty slider, velocity average, but great pitching instincts
RHP #37 Danny Hauser, 30, - 98 MPH fastball helped him K 185 in 171 big league innings, late-inning flamethrower moves to the rotation
LHP #32 Cole Mayberry, 26, - loves to throw his cutter at 94, spinning screwball confuses lefties and righties alike, developed a consistent change, fringy slider

Bullpen
LHP #45 Perry Collins, 34 - takes over the long relief role, great circle-change
LHP #49 Luc Godot, 32 - Godot has a herky-jerky motion and spotty control, but great velocity and wipeout slider,
LHP #46 Sidney Fleming, 28 - slings from a sidearm position, will be lefty specialist, sweet slider
RHP #38 Ross Long, 28 - average fastball, but good slider has righties flailing and change baffles lefties
RHP #56 Lucius Lavoie, 30 - Lavoie is a failed starter who has made it as a closer, fastball sits at 95 with a tumbling curveball, changeup and slider need some work
RHP #39 Bryan Baldwin, 26 - Baldwin is brother of softball's Brandi, knuckleballer can be long reliever, or come on for change of pace
RHP #27 Adrian Romero, 33, - 97 MPH fastball combined with 78 MPH palmball form deadly combination, pretty good curveball for third pitch, could be another long guy, great dancer
RHP #23 Colby Walker, 27 - Walker is a hard thrower (sits 96, touches 98) who developed secondary pitches to become DC Brewers closer
RHP #25 Jamey Conroy, 36 - stranglehold on national-team closer role, led league in saves a year ago, hard, nasty 2-seamer from a low 3/4 slot

C #53 Lamar Ford, 30, (L/R), - Ford is no longer a rookie for the Londinium Capitols, lefty bat is his best tool, but his defense has greatly improved, good speed for catcher, loves spaghetti
C #18 Tommie Griffin, 33, (R/R), - Griffin gets Hightower's old number, big bat and big arm, poor lateral mobility, developing pitch-calling, extra pinch-hitter more than catcher
C #51 Bryan Lamb, 24, (S/R), - Lamb showed an extraordinarily developed eye for the strike zone in his first big league season, with a 34/30 K/BB ratio, not much power, but good defender with decent arm

1B #21 Brooks Colvin, 29, (R/R), - Colvin has big shoes to fill, stepping into Al-Aniz's role, hits tons of doubles, but very few home runs, good defensively with a good arm for a first sacker
3B #26 Khris Caldwell, 33, (S/R), - Caldwell is a big boy who is surprisingly agile at the hot corner, better from the right side, but respectable from the left, club had to put a clause in his contract forbidding eating contests to control his weight
SS #11 Darrin Werner, 25, (R/R), - Werner is a phenom, challenging for MVP in his sophomore season, and showing off five tools in the process, Werner now the starter
2B #4 Josh Jennings, 32, (R/R), - Jennings is a now-veteran, blazing speed and great defense, loves to trash talk, sometimes goes too far, bat has improved
CI #50 Barry Glover, 34, (R/R), - Glover can play either corner infield position, hits well enough to be an emergency DH, gap-to-gap power, very jolly
MI #6 René Martel, 26, (S/R) - Martel is a superb defender, Yeomen organization believes the bat will develop with experience, will not hesitate to drop one down

OF #20 Kelvin Freeman, 31, (L/R), - Freeman posted a .268/.321/.490 line with 30 homers and 15 steals this year, cannon arm, good defensive routes, ladies' man
OF #7 Lance Manning, 30, (S/L), - 5'10 speedster continues to rack up the thefts, with 49 SB this year, beats out plenty of infield hits, indiscriminate swinger, needs to take more walks, especially now that he's leadoff guy
OF #24 Tony "Flick" Barnes (R/R), 34 - Barnes has made right field his own, has good power and a sweet swing, not bad on basepaths or in the field
OF #29 Dana Jordan, 34, S/R, - shows good speed and average, ideal to form either half of a platoon or act as defensive replacement
OF #10 Leon French, 30, (R/R), - poor batting average holding him back, but great power

Graig Lowman #60 (Manager)

Dante Woodward #1 (Hitting Coach)

Charley Battaglia #47 (Pitching Coach)

Claude Corbett #9 (1st Base Coach)

Freddy Snider #8 (3rd Base Coach)

Marcellus Maloney #15 (Bench Coach)

Rhett Upshaw #52 (Bullpen Coach)

Starting Lineup w/o DH
CF Lance Manning
LF Kelvin Freeman
RF Tony "Flick" Barnes
3B Khris Caldwell
2B Josh Jennings
SS Darrin Werner
C Lamar Ford
1B Brooks Colvin
P Pitcher's Spot

Starting Lineup w/DH vs. R
CF Lance Manning
LF Kelvin Freeman
DH Khris Caldwell
RF Tony "Flick" Barnes
2B Josh Jennings
3B Barry Glover
C Lamar Ford
1B Brooks Colvin
SS Darrin Werner

Starting Lineup w/DH vs. L
CF Lance Manning
LF Kelvin Freeman
RF Tony "Flick" Barnes
DH Leon French
3B Khris Caldwell
2B Josh Jennings
SS Darrin Werner
1B Brooks Colvin
C Lamar Ford

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my runscorers: Yes/No
Choose my lineup: Yes/No
Follow my pitching rotation: Yes/No
Godmod scoring events: Yes/No
RP injuries to my players: Yes/No, but not serious ones. Back stiffness, jammed fingers, bruises, etc. Nothing that would keep them out of the lineup for more than 1 game. Reciprocity is expected.
Godmod injuries to my players: Yes/No
Eject my players: Yes/No, maybe the manager, though.
Godmod other events: Yes/No
Use DH at home: Yes/No

by **The Boatia** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 11:59 am

Takeoff

All the players boarded the private jet to head to the stadium in Frenline Delpha."This is comfy" said Will Sling. "Yeah not for long" said Christopher Billybob. "How long is this flight again??" said Bill Tom. "Your new around here so you don't know yet, it is 100 regions away. Which is going to be about couple days." said Samuel Lil. Johny. "Well thanks to RP Powers we will get there whenever the guy typing wants us to" said Dezin Nutin. "-slap- Really Dezin you had to break the 4th wall. said Ricker Kennedy. "Yeah really." said Bridy Boodin. "Guys look TAKEOFF BOYS LETS PLAY SOME BALL!!!!!!!!!!!!" yelled Christopher Billybob.

by **Frenline Delpha** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 1:29 pm

Groups A-D Cut-Off

Group A
Stuzemstazem Green Bulls                    0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 1  1
Schiltzberg Schiltz Burgers                 1 2 1 0 0 2 1 0 X  7

Boatia Llamas                               0 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 0  1
Nova Anglicana Lions                        0 3 5 0 0 0 3 0 X 11

Group A                                      Pld    W   L    RF   RA   RD   Pts 
1 Nova Anglicana Lions                         1    1   0    11    1  +10     3
2 Schiltzberg Schiltz Burgers                  1    1   0     7    1   +6     3
3 Stuzemstazem Green Bulls                     1    0   1     1    7   −6     0
4 Boatia Llamas                                1    0   1     1   11  −10     0

Group B
Shadownia Fruitbat Mafia                    0 1 0 0 0 0 0 3 0  4
Torisakia Ice Birds                         0 0 0 3 0 0 1 2 X  6

Pulunia Redwhite                            0 0 0 1 0 0 0 0 0  1
Coconut Isle Dwarfs                         2 0 0 0 0 1 0 2 X  5

Group B                                      Pld    W   L    RF   RA   RD   Pts 
1 Coconut Isle Dwarfs                          1    1   0     5    1   +4     3
2 Torisakia Ice Birds                          1    1   0     6    4   +2     3
3 Shadownia Fruitbat Mafia                     1    0   1     4    6   −2     0
4 Pulunia Redwhite                             1    0   1     1    5   −4     0

Group C
San Llera San Llerans                       0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0  0
Silvacometopia Sharks                       0 0 2 1 0 0 0 1 X  4

Abanhfleft Revolution                       0 1 0 0 2 0 0 0 0  3
Pinoyistan Destoroyers                      0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0  0

Group C                                      Pld    W   L    RF   RA   RD   Pts 
1 Silvacometopia Sharks                        1    1   0     4    0   +4     3
2 Abanhfleft Revolution                        1    1   0     3    0   +3     3
3 Pinoyistan Destoroyers                       1    0   1     0    3   −3     0
4 San Llera San Llerans                        1    0   1     0    4   −4     0

Group D
The Serbian Empire 66ers                    3 0 0 1 0 1 0 0 0  5
Kaboomlandia Phoenix                        2 0 0 1 0 3 0 2 X  8

Ruairikstan Ruarbears                       1 2 0 0 1 0 0 0 0  4
Camelone Ultras                             0 1 1 2 1 0 1 1 X  7

Group D                                      Pld    W   L    RF   RA   RD   Pts 
1 Kaboomlandia Phoenix                         1    1   0     8    5   +3     3
2 Camelone Ultras                              1    1   0     7    4   +3     3
3 The Serbian Empire 66ers                     1    0   1     5    8   −3     0
4 Ruairikstan Ruarbears                        1    0   1     4    7   −3     0

by **Schiltzberg** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 2:43 pm

Groups E-F Cut-Off

Group E
Ethane Red Stars                   0 3 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 4
Frenline Delpha Anacondas          0 0 0 0 1 0 1 1 0 3

Gregoryisgodistan Bat Slaves       0 0 1 0 2 1 0 1 1 6
Levivania Dohickeys                0 2 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 3

Group E                            Pld W L RF RA RD Pts 
1 Gregoryisgodistan Bat Slaves       1 1 0  6  3  +3  3
2 Ethane Red Stars                   1 1 0  4  3  +1  3
3 Frenline Delpha Anacondas          1 0 1  3  4  −1  0
4 Levivania Dohickeys                1 0 1  3  6  −3  0

Group F
Elykyellek Stars                        3 0 0 0 0 0 2 0 0 5
United States of Devonta Thundersticks  1 0 0 1 1 2 0 0 1 6

The Sword Bloke Thunder                 0 0 4 0 0 0 0 0 0 4
Koana Islands Warriors                  0 0 0 0 2 0 0 0 0 2

Group F                                 Pld W L RF RA RD Pts 
1 The Sword Bloke Thunder                 1 1 0  4  2  +2  3
2 United States of Devonta Thundersticks  1 1 0  6  5  +1  3
3 Elykyellek Stars                        1 0 1  5  6  −1  0
4 Koana Islands Warriors                  1 0 1  2  4  −2  0

Group G
Avercari Cassowaries               1 0 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 2
Oisinistan Red Storm               1 0 1 0 0 2 0 2 X 6

Ferret Civilization Ferrets        0 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 1 2
Lisander Arminhos                  0 8 0 0 0 0 0 1 X 9

Group G                            Pld W L RF RA RD Pts 
1 Lisander Arminhos                  1 1 0  9  2  +7  3
2 Oisinistan Red Storm               1 1 0  6  2  +4  3
3 Avercari Cassowaries               1 0 1  2  6  −4  0
4 Ferret Civilization Ferrets        1 0 1  2  9  −7  0

Group H
Acronius Foxhounds                 1 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 1 3
Nassau Eagles                      1 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 3 5

Potataca Potatos                   0 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 1
South Yerfilag Eagles              0 0 3 0 0 0 0 0 X 3

Group H                            Pld W L RF RA RD Pts 
1 Nassau Eagles                      1 1 0  5  3  +2  3
2 South Yerfilag Eagles              1 1 0  3  1  +2  3
3 Acronius Foxhounds                 1 0 1  3  5  −2  0
4 Potataca Potatos                   1 0 1  1  3  −2  0

by **The Boatia** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 2:59 pm

Game Day

Christopher Billybob lined up to bat. The ball came straight at him and he hit it far but it was caught for an out. "Oh Wow" said Christopher Billybob back in the dugout. "Hey, you can't always win... but you just wanna." said Samuel Lil. Johny. "I am up so watch and learn." said Samuel Lil. Johny. Samuel Lil. Johny was thrown into a strikeout. "Hmph, I don't think I learned much." said Christopher Billybob. "Grr" said Samuel Lil. Johny. The inning ended scoreless. "Hey, we got a chance looks like its gonna be a close game." said Will Sling. 2 innings passes and it was 7-0 in favor of the Lions(Nova Anglicana will rp their scorings and stuff). "Well no chance now." said Harold Henry. "Yep" said Johny Beller. "Well we tried atleast isn't that what matters most?? and having fun right??? or is that from childhood." said Jake Ello. "Were getting back out there now lets atleast get a couple points on the board." said Dezin Nutin. They got out there yet the inning was boring and scoreless. The next inning 2 outs and 2 strikes and Dezin Nutin was at plate. "Cmon kid pitch it" he said to himself. The pitcher pitched and he hit it perfectly scoring a home run. He ran and since the bases were empty it only gave the Boatia Llama's 1 point. Everybody in the dugout and Boatia fans were cheering wildly. The next inning the outfielders failed and let them grab another 3 points before the scoreless last inning. In the last inning Christopher Billybob and Samuel Lil. Johny almost got home runs but were caught for an out. The game finally ended 11-1. "Wow" said Gary Dolgo. "Man can't believe it.. there is always next time atleast." said Keither Weav. "Hey anybody up for a postgame pizza." said Christopher Billybob. "YEAH" everybody chanted running off to the limo to drive to the best pizza place they can find around.

by **South Yerfilag** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 3:18 pm

((OOC: This actually happened just before the game listed above.))

covering the 10th International Baseball Slam

IBS Pregame
sponsored by Yerfitel

BART BIGELOW: Hello, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to Vortcom's coverage of the 10th edition of the International Baseball Slam. This tournament, having always been in the shadow of the much larger and more well-known World Baseball Classic, has been destined for failure by many. However, it is with great pleasure that the South Yerfilag Ball Sport Association, under the cryptic baton of Margaretha Kierkegaard, has decided to place a team in the tournament in hopes that it will rise again. Joining me now is WBC star pitcher Jacinda van Heel, who will be helping me call each and every shot for the group stage here at the analyst desk.

JACINDA VAN HEEL: Hello everyone! Without further ado, let's get right to it!

(The Group Stage table appears on the screen. VAN HEEL continues.)

VAN HEEL: Let's start with Group A, containing Schiltzberg, Nova Anglicana, The Boatia, and Stuzemstazem. Both of the former two teams have high rankings, while the Boatia and Stuzemstazem have high odds against them. So the big question is, do the Boatia or Stuzemstazem get out alive?

BIGELOW: As much as I'd like to see the newer teams, ours included, come off with a chance at the double-elimination rounds, I'd say Nova Anglicana has the best chance of getting to the eliminations. Host Schiltzberg would finish a close second. I say this because Nova Anglicana has generally had the best showing of most, but not all, of the teams participating in the tournament.

VAN HEEL: All right. Group B contains Torisakia, Coconut Isle --

BIGELOW: Coconut Isle, hands down.

VAN HEEL: (laughing) You didn't even let me finish! -- Pulunia, and Shadownia.

BIGELOW: Well, the reason I stopped you is because we know nothing about either Toriaskia or Pulunia. Therefore, with the information I have in front of me, Coconut Isle has traditionally been defencive in its runnings, so while they may not rack up a huge run total, they will easily take Group B against a primarly offencive Fruitbat Mafia.

VAN HEEL: You seem pretty sure of that.

BIGELOW: What can I say? If we only have half of the team information at press time, I can, of course, made generally stupid picks if I want to.

VAN HEEL: Oh, I see. Well then, you're in luck, because Group C team information is currently restricted to the Abanhfleft Revolution and the San Llera San Llerans.

BIGELOW: So Abanhfleft is apparently using the team it fielded in the WBC, if I understand correctly.

VAN HEEL: Not completely, but the Revolution definitely has its attacking players. Go ahead and say it.

BIGELOW: Abanhfleft by a country mile.

VAN HEEL: OK, we head now to Group D and its lone ranked team, the Kaboomlandia Phoenix.

BIGELOW: Well, we only have information so far on them and the Ruairikstan Ruarbears at this point. But - and this may come as a suprise to our viewers - I don't think Kaboomlandia will pull it off. I think that about halfway in they will choke on their attack and lose crucial innings to the other teams in its pot.

VAN HEEL: OK, that's interesting. I can't wait to see what happens in regard to that group. I'm rooting for Kaboomlandia myself in that group, but we'll just have to see what happens. OK, walk us through Groups E to H.

BIGELOW: Actually, that'll have to happen on our next show, as we're out of time at this point, as the home match between the Potataca Potatoes and our own South Yerfilag Eagles will air at 7 PM Post Time here in South Yerfilag, and you'll see us again just after your local noticiero. But for know, let's head over to the caster desk, where Will Perry and Jessamine Lastings, another emerging WBC star, will take over.

by **The Central Shadow Nation** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 3:24 pm

Game day

Franz Barnz was disappointed at the loss. If he had pitched just a wee bit above he could've just walked the batter. But at that time Franz didn't want the bases loaded, so he concluded that he would just strike the batter out and end the inning.

"I took the wrong route and that sent us spiraling towards are first game's finish and our first season loss as of November,"Franz said. "Ive been in the WBC once and as of now IBS two times. And in order to climb to the top of our group,we'll need to bounce back later in the season. Our offense needs to be clutch like it was in this game so cheers to them. Um, Williams hit the RBI double in the first, we got the chains moving with a solo home run by D'yomm and the back to back RBI doubles hit by Doug and A-vern. The inning, and our scoring ended after the sacrifice RBI by Orun. I believe if our pitching and moral can stay up then we can win this.

Shey Armstrong had something to say as the manager aswell. "We can bounceback if we can execute our hits in an orderly manner. Our relief can use a few addons with the lack of major variety, but they do have some good and raw talent. I take it that we can groom this game to our advantage in the next game. Just need to stay sharp."

Eli Williams is never talkative after a game. He has lost and gained respect with his happy personality but his negative and defensive personality in other places, such as the fight in the clubhouse during warmups last week. But today he showed a positive spirit and gave us their suggestions.

"We just gotta work on getting on base. We have our contact hitters and we have our power hitters. If we can steal bases then we can work up. If we can get a cycle of singles, hell yeah i'll take it. We just need good execution with our hitting. I'm not a pitcher and I don't know about them but I think my suggestions can improve my side of the team. Our coaches are good. Our offence was already on fire and will continue to be but every little step counts, because those steps are forming into a walk. Then,well start jogging into the championships."

by **Lisander** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 4:53 pm

Sebastian Garnet, to TV5 Sports

Second inning, the score still marked 0-0. After 3-out in the first inning, the best lisanderian batter, Rei Yokoyama would start batting. Coach Hiddleston came near the young half-Japanese, which was among others preparing to go out, and spoke:

-Rei, I expect a lot from you. You lead this team since the last tournament. Go and hit everything. As for you, all of you. Argan, Hansen, Matsumori ... I want to see all hitting today. Their team is weaker. But I do not want to see no one get lazy in the field. Everyone has to strive. A Lion always hunt its prey with all his strength. The guys over at the other bench also came to give their best. Then follow playing with respect, but without forgetting what we came to do. We came to get to the finals and proudly represent of our country, understand?

-YES!

Those words, captured by the TV5 Lisander exclusive mic, seem to have given to Lisander players a kind of superpower. Animated by the words of coach, the stoats did not hit only one or two run. They made it 8 times. Lisander opened 8-0 at the end of the second inning. Almost all batters hit runs. What we saw was a easy game.

Yokoyama opened with a double, then a single of each Monteiro and Argan led the fourth batsman to open 1-0. Cyril Montez hit a single and filled the bases. The perfect scenario for rookie Adrian Solis. He almost lost everything, but managed an excellent ground ball that deceived opponents. A triple that led Ermines to 4-0. On the bench, the coach shouted euphoric.

-ISSO, PORRAAA! BOA ADRIAN, BOTA PRA FUDER! - Expressions in Portuguese that we can not translate.

Tiago Porter, subsequent batter and pitcher, saving for the throws, missed the three, leaving the responsibility to Julian Matsumori, with one out. Matsumori hit a triple that narrowly missed a Home Run. Then Martin Hansen and Kenji Hirano agreed on a double each, bringing the score to 6-0. Yokoyama, who had opened the sequence, concluded it with a Home Run, to 8-0. The coach has not had more voice to yell after that second entrance, which concluded with the departure of Monteiro and Argan, eliminated with Fly-out. According to our commentators, both intentional fly-outs, so that the distance in score that it was absurd, would not be even bigger. What we heard later, when Ferret Civilization marked his first run, was the voice of the coach...

-Guys, Cool down now. We already guarantee the result, brilliantly thanks to you. Keep playing with it, but nothing to overload.

Thus, Arminhos followed taking slowly the game. In the end, in the eighth inning, Martin Hansen hit a last home run. 9-1. In the last inning, the Ferret Civilization team also scored 9-2, but it was insufficient to achieve the Arminhos, that left the field with a capital victory and a clear leadership of the group.

Final Result

Ferret Civilization Ferrets        0 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 1 2
Lisander Arminhos                  0 8 0 0 0 0 0 1 X 9

by **The Boatia** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 4:55 pm

This is Boatia Sports the live coverage of all sports events that our country, The Boatia are in.

Denny Footer: I am your host Denny Footer along with Greg Takin, Jerry Verdin and Mike Bullard.

Greg Takin: That is right, today we are going to start with the game today a huge loss 11-1.

Mike Bullard: Yes it is a sad day for Boatia fans as a terrible loss has been over in Frenline Delpha which was where the game took place. Dezin Nutin had that one great home run to help us get atleast a point.

Denny Footer: We are now going to cover season predictions of who will win their group.

Jerry Verdin: Group A, Green Bulls,Burgers,Llamas and Lions

Greg Takin: I think that its gonna end out 1st. Lions | 2nd. Burgers | 3rd. Llamas | 4th. Green Bulls

Mike Bullard: I call 1st. Burgers | 2nd. Lions | 3rd Llamas | 4th. Green Bulls

Denny Footer: I am gonna have to say here 1st. Lions | 2nd. Burgers | 3rd. Green Bulls | 4th. Llamas

Jerry Verdin: Woah us in last I am not sure I agree

Denny Footer: Aye its a prediction

Jerry Verdin: Well, ok then I am going for 1st. Lions | 2nd. Llamas | 3rd. Lions | 4th. Green Bulls

Mike Bullard: Its like you just did that because The Boatia Llamas are our team

Jerry Verdin: Prediction....

Denny Footer: Ok Jerry Group B

Jerry Verdin: Mafia,Ice Birds,Redwhite and Dwarfs

Greg Takin: 1st. Dwarfs | 2nd. Mafia | 3rd. Ice Birds | 4th. Redwhite

Mike Bullard: I agree with Greg

Denny Footer: 1st. Mafia | 2nd. Dwarfs | 3rd. Ice Birds | 4th. Redwhite

Jerry Verdin: Hmm interesting but I agree with Greg

Denny Footer: Ehh just a prediction of last but not least Group C and then coming on later tonight is the other Group A game on this channel along with Phoenix vs. 66ers and then on the other sports channel is Bat Slaves vs. Dohickeys and Thundersticks vs. Stars

Jerry Verdin: San Llerans,Sharks,Destroyers and Revolution

Greg Takin: 1st. San Llerans | 2nd. Sharks | 3rd. Destroyers | 4th. Revolution

Mike Bullard: 1st. Sharks | 2nd. San Llerans | 3rd. Revolution | 4th. Destroyers

Denny Footer: 1st. San Llerans | 2nd. Sharks | 3rd. Revolution | 4th. Destroyers

Jerry Verdin: 1st. Sharks | 2nd. San Llerans | 3rd. Revolution | 4th. Destroyers

Denny Footer: Interesting and that is all for now stay tuned for tomorrow for Group D,E and F then later on G and H

This show is brought you by IBS, International Baseball Slam.

(Commercials come)

by **Koana Islands** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 5:06 pm

Warriors fall short in 4-2 loss to Thunder

The Sword Bloke Thunder (1-0)              0 0 4 0 0 0 0 0 0    4
Koana Islands Warriors (0-1)               0 0 0 0 2 0 0 0 0    2
W: S.Owner (1-0)        L: T.Brannstrom (0-1)      S: P.Marcins (1)

A solo shot to left field by Jules Burton (1-4, HR) opened the floodgates to a 4-run 3rd inning as the Thunder won game one of the Warriors quest for the Championship.

Craig Baseman (1-3, BB) and Jim Ursolos (2-5, 2B) both reached base safely before Theodor Brannstrom struckout Sammy Green (2-5). With men on the corners, Jay Cross (2-4, 2B, 3B) hit a triple into the alley at center-left to extend The Sword Bloke's lead to 3-0.

Markus Power (2-4) flew out to right fielder Emil Barkström which allowed Cross to tag up safely and score to push the lead to 4-0.

Theodor Brannstrom was pulled from the game after 4 and two-thirds innings, giving up 5 hits, 2 walks for 4 earned runs and was replaced by Maklolm Amdahl who lasted until the 8th inning.

"I think the 3rd [inning] rattled him a bit" said Pitching Coach Nicolai Åberg.

"He was struggling with his command for much of the game, and the rally frazzled him so much so that we had to replace him".

Warriors Catcher Abraham Hormertz (1-3) hit a 2-out double in the 5th and LF Efraim Nasberg (1-3, HR) went yard 3 pitches later to reduce the deficit in half but Koana Islands only managed a base hit and a walk in the remaining 4 innings thanks to Shop Owner's 8 innings of work, yielding just 2 runs off 6 hits, 2 walks and 9 strikeouts.

by **Gregoryisgodistan** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 7:11 pm

Lord Almighty Gregory's Speech to the People

"Good evening, ladies, gentlemen, and slaves. I speak to you tonight of events in the far-off land of Frenline Delpha, land of the snake flag, and the farther off land of Schiltzberg, which apparently came into our country and won the World Baseball Classic in their first attempt. How dare they! Anyway, a baseball tournament of no-names, us, and Nova Anglicana, is currently happening, the International Baseball Slam X. And we are going to win, because we are the Bat Slaves and we are great. Well, let's take a look at the other 31 teams, except Nova Anglicana because I actually respect them, and say what I really think of their no-name-ness.

"We'll start in Group A for Annoying, where the first team is Schiltzberg. More like PieceOfSchitzberg, they get lucky to win the World Baseball Classic in our country, and now they think they're better than us? Well, they're not. And their nickname sounds like a disgusting fast food place, who would go there? Their burgers are probably Schiltz. Ha ha, I will not have my joke writer killed because I wrote my own jokes this time.

"Then we have Nova Anglicana, the only other non-no-name in this tournament. I won't mock them. Then we have Boatia, the third team in Group A for Asshole, who apparently has ten men in their starting lineup, three of whom are pitchers. Ask yourself if this makes sense. It does not. Anyone who thinks it is must either be an idiot or know nothing about baseball. I don't know which one the Boatian manager is, but it's probably the first seeing as he managed to get himself hired as the manager. Or else the head of the Federation is an idiot and hired someone who knows nothing about baseball. That's possible too. Boatia's nickname is the Llamas. Llamas are actually awesome, unlike Boatia. How dare they pervert the name of the llama? I should nuke them just for that.

"The final team in Group A for As Smart As A Piece of Schitz is Stuzemstazem. Sounds like a magical incarnation - Stuzemstazem, you are now a good baseball team. Well, it would take magic to make them any good because they are terrible, they are the Schiltz. Haha, there's that joke again. After executing 17 joke writers, I have finally found a good one - me, the One True Lord. So nobody need be executed along with their family for failing me as the joke writer ever again. We will save that for other capital crimes, like looking in the sewers, flying kites, complaining, and riding an ugly horse. Don't commit a capital crime, folks.

"Now, we move on to Group B, B as in Bozo because that's what everyone in that Group is. The first team is the Torisakia Ice Birds, who evidently think they are playing hockey. Their hockey team is actually quite good, but, alas, this is not the World Cup of Hockey. You can't use a hockey stick, there is no puck, and you score runs, not goals. Also, there is no ice unless the hosts are completely incompetent, which they are not. But the field should not be an ice skating rink. That would be positively Costa Lunian if it were the case, but those Loony folks are not actually hosting the tournament, thank Me.

"Also in Group B for Boron is the team from a nation whose very name is forbidden here, so I will call them Xylocarp Isle. (OOC: Of course, this is Coconut Isle. But Coconut is a forbidden word here, punishable by death.) The Xylocarp Isle team is nicknamed the Dwarfs. Shouldn't it be Dwarves? There is no such word as Dwarfs. I will have to send the team to a Spelling Reeducation Camp then execute them for using a forbidden fruity word. Xylocarp Isle is on our Enemy List for a reason, and soon they will perish by nuclear bomb. But for now, they will just lose.

"The third team in Group B for Brainless is Pulunia. Well, Pulunia plays like Poo, so Poo Poo their chances because they have none. Might as well call them Poolunia, because that's what they are. And also they're Brainless. But life's more painless for the brainless, so when they lose they will laugh hysterically and think they won because they think they're playing golf. Which is also why they lost, because they were trying for the lower score and also swung the bat like a golf club. Idiots. Poopheads.

"Finally, in Group B for Butthead is Shadownia. Shadownia lives in the shadows, and is a mafia that eats Fruit Bats. Or so I'm told. Either way, they're Boron Brainless Butthead Bozos who are not going to win the International Baseball Slam. Who even cares about them? They should just have us and Nova Anglicana square off for the championship right now, and, of course, we'll win because we will. But that's not how it works. So we'll have to each win to get there. And then we'll win.

"Now let's move on to Group C for Crap. The first team in Group C for Crap is Silvacometopia. I don't know anything about them, but they sound like an old mafia dude, Silva Cometopia. But we have no mafia in Gregoryisgodistan, only in Shadownia and apparently Silva Competopia is the dean, or the don, or whatever those heathens call it. But they will all die in nuclear bombing someday when we nuke the whole world except ourselves for being heathens.

"The second team in Group C for Caca is Pinoyistan Destroyers. Well they are the Pinoyistan Destroyed. They will be destroyed, on the diamond and in life. We will nuke them into oblivion for I am the Lord Your God who nuked Hicana and San Jose Guayabal and initiated Human Blitzkrieg in numerous other countries, overthrowing the wicked heathen Consul Kulseth. But there's bad news - the Free Republics have just been taken over by another despot, another tyrant. I am not adding them to the Enemy List yet because I believe this election was rigged by the tyrant, who shall not be named because heathen tyrants don't deserve names. I believe he used his billions of dollars to bribe poll inspectors. There is no other explanation. So I will wait and see how the audit turns out and will aid Legion of Lucifer in overthrowing yet another tyrant should they desire. We would even assassinate this clown of a Rump.

"But back on topic, the third team in Group C for Cow Fart is Abanhfleft. They are actually halfway decent, but only halfway. They apparently are related to the Godless Heathens from Thereisnogodistan, the heathen country who sent a radical atheist terrorist legion called Death League of Newton to launch a terror attack on the Baptism of Iron and force its postponement for a day. That was most horrific, but Abanhfleft might not endorse that. Nevertheless, they will lose because nobody cares about them. Waah wahh wah.

"And the final team in Group C for Crazy is San Llera. San Llera, San Llera, San Llera, you had to pick the redundant nickname San Llerans, didn't you? Well nobody likes redundant Crazy Cow Fart Caca Crap, so you're going to lose. And then we will nuke you too, because we can. But first we will nuke Saintland and San Jose Guayabal, because they are worse. Unless Feministvs Sanctvsterra takes over and kills the King and the whole Royal Family, in which case whoopdeedoo we will rejoice.

"Now onto Group D for Dumbo. First up is Kaboomlandia. I actually admire them sort of - they make things blow up. But their people are still stupid for making the wrong things blow up. Instead of nuking Devil Nations like San Jose Guayabal and Saintland, they just nuke random pieces of sky and nobody dies. That's no fun. You're supposed to nuke your enemies, not yourself.And I am totally not making this up. Everything in this speech is completely true and not propaganda. Anyone who says otherwise is a liar. I am your Lord, so listen up fools.

"The second team in Group D as in Desperate for Attention is Camelone. Is there a Cameltwo, a Camelthree, and a Camelfour? Surely not, so it should just be Camel, not Camelone. That's stupid, they might as well be Costa Lunian. But they're not, they're One Solitary Camel. That is their entire nation. One solitary camel. That explains their dumb old name. So we should just ban camels, OK. And remember, I'm not lying, because why would God lie?

"The third team in Group D for Dunce is Ruairiairarara or something like that. I don't really care what they're called, they're all stupid for not accepting me as Lord. And also for thinking a catcher is an outfielder and not having a shortstop, but that's secondary really. At least their lineup has nine players, unlike Boatia's. But we will still nuke them eventually, on International Nuking Day, which will come soon, in just one year's time, when we nuke everyone who does not accept me as Lord Almighty. Maybe. It will come someday, and will be a surprise when it happens. It could happen tomorrow, it could happen in 200 years. I will still be alive - I am God, I am immortal. So you fools must obey.

"And the final team in Group D for Delusional is The Serbian Empire. This wicked nation dared free my own personal concubines at the Olympics a couple years ago. But we got revenge last year, oh sweet revenge. Our archer shot an arrow at one of theirs, and we continued to cause chaos throughout the games even as those stupid Kytlerians tried to shut us down. Will there be chaos in Electrum and New Gelderland? Well, I'll leave that question unanswered, I think that's best. Just don't antagonize us and you'll be fine. And don't even think about stopping our new national anthem from playing for our medalists, because, if you do, there will be serious consequences for everyone. But as long as you don't, you should be fine. But enough about that, back to baseball.

"First up in Group E for Evil is the co-host, Frenline Delpha. Their flag is a snake, which is ironic because their name sounds sort of like Feline Delta so their flag should be a triangle lolcat. Ha ha, lolcats. But Feline Delpha is apparently co-hosting this tournament, no Schitz. But yes, they are co-hosting with that Schitz nation, or whatever they're called. Nobody really cares. We will win this tournament wherever it is, even if it is on the moon. Also, crushing is legal on the moon so maybe we should play there in IBS XI. Or wherever. We'll still win.

"The second team in Group E for Extremely Stupid is Levivania. We already beat them. We're 1-0. Clearly we're the best team here. I don't know what a Dohickey is but I think it's like a Thingamabobber. In other words, nothing with a name, just a stupid little thing. Which is what they are.

"Third up in Group E for Extremely Awesome is us. We will win. Nuff said.

"And finally, in Group E for Eh, They're Stupid, is Etane. Or Ethane. I'm not quite sure. But Eh, They're Stupid is quite accurate. Nobody knows their name so their people must be stupid. And of course, I am totally not lying, and this is totally not a suspiciously specific denial. Nor was that. Or that. And so on.

"Now, we move to Group F for Fartface. First up is United States of Devonta. Or USD for short. Sounds like a currency, so I can just bribe them to go away. But they'll probably eat the money because their people are so darn stupid and Fartfacey. We will still beat them if we play them. And they will lose, then get nuked eventually.

"Second in Group F for Fuckfart is Koana Islands. Koana Islands sounds like Koala Islands but isn't. They're as smart as Koalas. Maybe they're as cute too. But Koalas aren't very smart. They just eat bamboo and smoke weed all day. Or maybe they don't. I'm not an expert on Koalas. Or maybe that's only half true. I really don't know, I really don't care, Koana/Koala Islands is going to lose. We are going to win.

"Third in Group F for Farfel Kugel is Shop Owner's The Sword Bloke team. Shop Owner impresses me - he likes nuking things, he likes blowing things up, he could be my partner in nuking if I had such use for a minion. And he did help us fight the Devils of San Jose Guayabal during the Great War. But he's not God, despite his claims. Maybe the Swordeans come in third behind us and Nova Anglicana, I'd love to see that, but they won't make the final. And Shop Owner won't ever be God.

"And finally, in Group F for Freaks is Ellyelsaelphaba or something like that. I really don't care what their name is. They smell like beans, they think like goats, and they act like boxes of steaming hot shit. And everything I say is true, I am not a liar, and none of this is, or has ever been, a Suspiciously Specific Denial. I never lie to you, for I am the Lord Your God and everything I say is true.

"Now, onto Group G for Godless Heathens. First up is Oisinistan, who also has no shortstop. Why do so many teams in this tournament have no shortstop? Don't any of these managers know a thing about baseball? Well, they'll lose because you kind of need a shortstop and a catcher is still not a fourth outfielder. How adorable that they're trying, but they failed. It's OK. Not everyone can be a baseball manager, so quit and let someone else take over, Clown.

"Second in Group G for GoogooGaga is Lisander Arminhos. They make up words - you can't do that. Only God can make up words and I am God. And I say Arminhos isn't a word. Get yourselves to a Vocabulary Reeducation Camp immediately. For 28 days, you will spend 23 hours a day learning vocabulary, and the other hour eating gruel, drinking prune juice, going to the bathroom, or sleeping. And you can't shower becausr that's a capital crime.

"Third in Group G for Gladly Let Them Lose is Ferret Civilization. Ferrets are awesome, Ferret Civilization is OK too. But they won't win, because we will. They will come in fourth behind us, Nova Anglicana, and the Swordeans. But we will win. Don't forget that. Ferrets are awesome.

"And fourth in Group G for Go To The Land of Eternal Punishment is the Avocado Casseroles, or something like that. According to my secret sources, they are a team of sapient avocado Casseroles. That is so stupid. And everyone who thinks it isn't will be sent to the Land of Eternal Punishment, where they will be slowly sliced with the Brownie Cutter of Death, killed, resurrected, only to repeat the process for all eternity. Unless they are sapient avocado casseroles, because only humans can go to the Land of Eternal Paradise or the Land of Eternal Punishment. And for those who don't know, the Brownie Cutter of Death is the most painful execution instrument in the multiverse. It is essentially a giant brownie cutter, except it is sharp enough to slice through bones and organs. It is used for the worst offenders - those who disgrace or blaspheme Lord Almighty Gregory or this great nation, and it is extremely painful. Their bodies are chopped up into hundreds of pieces as they howl in pain, begging for a quick death, but one does not come.

"Now onto Group H for Hallelujah, Only One More Group of Fools. First up is Nassau, or Hessen, or Nassau-Hessen. Take your pick. I don't know, I don't care, they are losing. Your wings are clipped, Eagles. You will fall from the sky and wind up as bird poop, force fed to heathens, then killed. We will win.

"And second in Group H for Hey, They Still Suck is South Yerfilag. Yet there is no North Yerfilag that I know of, so it's another stupid name of a nation. Much like Camel One. But they will lose too, for they too are Godless Heathens who must be destroyed. Then it's NUKEY TIME!

"Third in Group H as in Heathens is the Potacana Potatos. Who apparently can't spell Potatos. It's P-O-T-A-T-O-E-S. But Potato is P-O-T-A-T-O, something Prune Farmer DANQUAYLE apparently does not know as he just received 600 life sentences in a Spelling Reeducation Camp for spelling it wrong repeatedly as P-O-T-A-T-O-E after being given numerous chances to correct himself and avoid further sentencing. Eventually the Spelling Reeducation Officer gave up. Consequently, after Prune Farmer DANQUAYLE dies, a speaker will be set up at his grave that will play a voice spelling Potato correctly for 599 lifetimes, defined by however long Prune Farmer DANQUAYLE lives. A Spelling Enforcement Officer will check the batteries and change them and the tape as necessary. But this is what happens to fools who can't spell.

"And finally, the last team is the Acronius Foxhounds, formerly the Darvale Flames. Nations who change their name are dumb. They will be nuked. Nobody likes them. They will soon be the Acronius Flames, because they will be on fire.

"That is it, and we will win. The heathens will die, yadda yadda yadda, Good Night and Me Bless Gregoryisgodistan!"

by **Nova Anglicana** » Wed Nov 11, 2015 8:24 pm

Lions Crush Llamas

Allen Talos, Londinium Courier

Several years ago, that headline might have meant that the Nova Anglicana Lions national baseball team had triumphed over three-time WBC champions Super-Llamaland, at one time the undisputed ruler of international baseball. However, just as Super-Llamaland has been somewhat diminished, the Lions have struggled as well. From as high as third place in WBC 28, the Lions finished 4th in WBC 29 and then only made it to the quarterfinals in WBCs 30 and 31. There was a slight renaissance of third place again in WBC 32, but they crashed and burned in WBC 33, not even making it to the playoffs. WBC 34 was little better, as the Lions made it to the Round of 16, but flamed out against an underwhelming Jeckish Union squad. They remain the second-best team in International Baseball Slam play, according to the rankings, but there is no doubt that they are not what they used to be. Graig Lowman has taken this team to much success over his tenure as national team manager, but after group-stage eliminations in WBC 33 and IBS IX, the latter of which Nova Anglicana hosted, there is a growing consensus that his job is at risk unless the next IBS/WBC cycle is a strong one.

Well, there is good news on that front. The Lions opened up IBS X play in Frenline Delpha against the Boatia Llamas, a team making their debut on the world stage. The Llamas played with enthusiasm, but it is hard to describe them as anything more than well-intentioned dilettantes at this point. At no time in the game were the Lions ever in danger of losing, rolling to an 11-1 win. Chris Keyes, the Lions' ace, took the mound and spun a complete game gem, only allowing three hits and one run. He also struck out ten and walked none, throwing just 103 pitches. The only blemish on his record came from the ridiculously-named Dezin Nutin in the 6th, who hit a solo shot to left field. After the game, Keyes credited his catcher Lamar Ford's guidance. "Fordie had a great game behind the plate. Pitch, location, count, you name it, he was on top of it. It's never just the guy throwing the ball who gets the hitters out, it's always a partnership."

On the offensive side of things, pitcher Christopher Billybob for Boatia did not make it out of the third inning, surrendering eight runs in 2.2 innings. He retired the side in order in the first, but Khris Caldwell led off the second with a ringing double off the left-center field wall. After a wild pitch moved him up to third base, Josh Jennings hit a sacrifice fly to give the Lions a 1-0 lead. Darrin Werner coaxed a walk from the Boatia hurler, then moved up to second as Lamar Ford hit a sharp grounder through the right side of the infield. Brooks Colvin then hit a deep fly ball that center fielder Ricker Kennedy misplayed, going forward first. It's perhaps no surprise this happened, as Boatia has no designated center fielder playing for them and ended up using Kennedy, nominally a pitcher. Colvin ended up on third when none of the other outfielders bothered to back up Kennedy and both Werner and Ford scored. In the third, Lance Manning and Kelvin Freeman led off with back-to-back singles, then the veteran Tony "Flick" Barnes crushed a hanging curve for a two-run triple to right-center field. Caldwell hit an RBI groundout, giving the Lions a 6-0 advantage. They extended it to 8-0 when Lamar Ford hit a two-run shot to right, scoring Josh Jennings. That chased Billybob and brought in George Johner, who pitched the rest of the game, allowing three runs in 5.1 innings. Johner got no help from his defense, as Barnes hit a ball that went through the legs of right fielder Samuel Lil. Johny for a single and a two-base error in the seventh inning. Kennedy then dropped Caldwell's medium-depth flyball, allowing Barnes to score and Caldwell to move up to second. A couple of good hits and outfield blunders later, the inning ended with the Lions leading 11-1.

Unfortunately, the Lions cannot expect their next opponents to be as inept as the Llamas, and will have to get a good game from Nate Freeman and the bats if they hope to defeat co-hosts and former WBC champions Schiltzberg. The first of twelve games is down; let's hope the Lions give just as good a performance in the rest of the tournament as they did on this first night.

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Thu Nov 12, 2015 1:37 am

Part One

There's the Way, Where's the Will?, Part Two

Smiley looked out of the door to her house for a brief moment before ducking her head back inside. And then, once she was sure that the coast was clear, she opened the door once again and she stepped out, followed by Matt, who was wearing the hood of his jacket up to obscure his face to casual observers. And as if that wasn't enough, Matt had wrapped a blue-and-yellow scarf around his neck, but in such a way that it also covered up the bottom half of his face.

"You look ridiculous," Smiley said as the two of them began walking down the street. The scarf around Matt's face was an old Riuwiee United scarf that she had bought for him for his birthday, which turned out to be the last birthday that they celebrated before Matt ran away to start his own life. Smiley had no idea that Matt had kept the scarf with him, and while she was secretly glad that he did, she honestly thought that Matt looked stupid wearing a big scarf in hot and stuffy Riuwiee.

"I have to disguise myself, Smiles," Matt replied through the scarf. "You never know when RBI agents might come checking people's faces on random street corners."

"Have you been taking drugs, Matt?" Smiley asked. "You're quite paranoid."

"I'll tell you later," Matt said.

They finally arrived at the coffee shop that Smiley frequented without incident, and as Smiley went off to buy their drinks Matt took a seat in a corner booth as far away from the shop doors as possible and surreptitiously lowered the hood of his jacket and his scarf. Because of his choice of seating arrangements, it took Smiley some time before she managed to find him. "I bought mocha lattes for the two of us," she said as she sat down. "You know, you really should watch your mouth, Matt. You offered to buy coffee before checking to see if you had any cash on you."

"It was an honest mistake, Smiley, I tell you," Matt said. "Thanks for the coffee anyway."

"All right, let's start from the beginning, Matt," Smiley said. "After you ran away, what did you say you did again? I remember you saying something about England, but after that, I'm not really sure."

"Yes, about that." Matt wiped the coffee from his chin with a brown paper napkin before putting his elbows on the table and clasping his hands in front of him. "I managed to get to England with the money that my father left behind for Mom and me. I managed to get a night degree in economics there thanks to my dad's contacts, but after that I went back here so as not to overstay my welcome, so to speak."

"I'll say," Smiley said. "Your dad's real family must not have been happy to see you there when you did." Matt's biological father was not the same man who was Smiley's biological father, so technically they were only half-brother and half-sister, but because their fathers were both absentees, they had come to consider each other as real flesh-and-blood siblings. At least before Matt ran away and left Smiley and Japheth to their mother.

"Tell me about it. Anyway, I left England and returned here to Abanhfleft, where I managed to get some friends together and, using all the cash we had between us we set up a stockbroking company. Now, Smiley, I won't mince words here. I'm a con man, plain and simple. We took cheap penny stocks and pumped and dumped them into the market. And we were all doing well. We got rich, all of us. We had yachts, sports cars, mansions, those kinds of things. And we also partied hard. You wouldn't believe how much booze and drugs flowed all around us every time we had one of these parties. It was just like The Wolf of Wall Street, Smiley, I'm telling you. I drank enough booze to give a Russian liver failure and took enough drugs for doctors to call me chronically addicted. And the sex... oh, you wouldn't believe the sex. We did it with anything and everything that moved. Woman, man; heck, I even remember some bestiality mixed in there somewhere."

"Uh, Matt?" Smiley asked. "I think you're veering towards 'too much information' territory there."

"What? Oh, yes, of course." Matt nodded his head and took another sip of coffee. "Anyway, long story short, I got rich quick through cons, and the RBI found out, and now I need to lay low, at least until the investigation blows over."

"What's in it for me?" Smiley asked.

"Well, what is that you want? I've got numerous offshore accounts. You want a nice big lump sum of cash in your own account? I can do that. Or maybe you want a bigger house. Maybe some Lambos and Ferraris thrown in there too?"

"That's not my point, Matt," Smiley said, shaking her head. "All right, let me rephrase the question. What happens to me and Japhy if we get caught hiding you, a fugitive, in our house?"

"You won't get caught," Matt assured Smiley. "I've got a contact inside the RBI. He's gonna tell me if the blues are getting close to my trail. If he calls me, I'm gonna be out of your house faster than you can say, 'Go!'"

"You say that, Matt, but what's stopping your contact from backstabbing you and turning you over to the Bureau?"

"He's an off-the-books member of the company," Matt replied confidently. "If I fall, he falls too. And he's on such a good standing with the RBI. The potential scandal alone's enough of a guarantee of his loyalty."

"Still, I don't think that's a very good arrangement."

"Do you have any better ideas, dear sister?"

"To be honest, no. All my friends are bit-part actors and commercial models. They'll squeal on you as soon as they see the nearest press camera just so they can advance their own careers. Man, my friends suck."

"What about my friends, Smiley?" Matt asked back. "They've all gone in hiding too. They didn't even bother setting up clandestine meets, like you would think they do in the movies."

"But this isn't a movie, Matt. This is real life. Besides, how long do you think the RBI will be on your tail?"

"When was the last time the RBI had this big of an investigation?" Matt asked.

"Well, I know that they're bringing down organized crime over in Releinthi," Smiley said, "but all that's managed to do is bring down one big syndicate and leave behind a turf war for the local PD to deal with."

"I tell you, Smiley, as soon as the turf war over in Releinthi gets quote-unquote 'out of control,' the RBI's gonna forget about us conmen."

"I hate it when you say things so confidently that I'm inherently inclined to agree," Smiley muttered. "All right, you can stay with me and Japhy for as long as this investigation into you takes. But once it's over, Matt, I'm telling you this now, I want you out of my house and back to where you came from. Got that?"

"You have no idea how much this means to me, Smiley," Matt said. "And yes, I promise that as soon as the RBI no longer cares about me, I'll be out of your pixie hair in no time."

"Shake on it?" Smiley asked, offering her hand.

"Shake," Matt said, taking Smiley's hand.

"Okay," Smiley said. "I've got this guest bedroom that I haven't been using very much since I don't have many guests over anyway. You're free to use it if you like."

"Thanks, Smiles, I really appreciate that."

"Besides, maybe it's time that Japhy finally met his big brother."

"Oh, so that big guy next to you was Japhy! Jesus Christ, the last time I saw him, he was just a wee little baby!"

"Yeah! Even I can't believe how big he's grown! I mean, after you left, Mom basically made me care for Japhy myself. I actually feel more like Japhy's mother than his sister, if you know what I mean?"

"Ha, that's so much like Mom," Matt muttered. "The fact that Japhy's dad is not my dad or your dad probably made the decision easy for her."

"Tell me about it," Smiley said as she sipped her coffee.

by **Ferret Civilization** » Thu Nov 12, 2015 7:38 am

Seoc Gareth looked at the team of ferret that made up the FC Ferrets sports team for baseball, it wasn’t much but given their purpose they were more than enough. They all were given a great honor of being able to represent The Colony to the outside world that they had recently been so exposed to and to expose themselves to the outside world too. The whole team was pretty excited, even though they were all sure that they weren’t going to win again any of the competition, though that part didn’t matter to them since they were lucky enough just to be a part of this event. The Colony was trying hard to get involved in the outside world and this was just one of the ways to do that, even if they didn’t make it they did their part for the greater good. Everything else was just extra for the ferrets and the sports along with anything else.

“Look, the game is about to start, and we’re all excited. I know you will all try your best, and we are going up against some pretty great teams, so no matter what happens, I’m proud of you all. Now let’s go out there and show this outside world what Ferrets are, and have fun doing it.”

The first inning was the most interesting for them, none of them were able to get a single run, and most of them couldn’t even get to first base, though the first time it happened it got a pretty loud cheer from the rest of the team. The fact that they also somehow managed to keep the Arminhos from getting a single run was also pretty exciting. Being able to do what they did was something that wasn’t expected from any of them. After that inning though their luck seemed to run out for them as the skill difference began to show.

“At least we aren’t completely getting our tails handed to us.” Seoc joked to his fellow teammates as the game went on, “Though I would love to see anybody do that.”

As the innings continued on the score continued to go against them. What was odd about it though is that it didn’t affect the team’s moral at all. They all still cheered wildly whenever one of them was able to accomplish anything, even if it wasn’t a run, to them it was way better than nothing at all. Even as they messed up they laughed it off between themselves as the game went on, they all knew that each other was trying their best and they all were having fun doing it, even if it was losing.

When the game was starting to wrap up they were finally able to keep the – from continuing their complete domination over them. Which really ended up boosting their overall moral even though they never seemed to lose any of it in the first place. Once they finally got their first run they all had to celebrate and dook. Even though by now it was guaranteed that they wouldn’t win the game none of them cared still, they still were having fun, and they were still able to get a run. The second run they were able to get didn’t get any less of a celebration from the entire team. And after that the game finished up and they lost, badly, and yet the entire team was overjoyed anyways, because in the end they were able to do something amazing to all of them.

“You think the other team is going to celebrate their victory?” Cillín Peer asked after the game was over.

Haraldur Torbjørn laughed, “Why, you want to join them in the party?”

“Sort of, we’ve been partying since before the game began. And it would be great for the exposure, and who knows, maybe we would learn something.”
“One, I’m pretty sure they want nothing more to do with us. And two, there is no way they would let us know anything.”

“I’ll be sure to let the other team know how great they are, now come on, we have a lot to celebrate.” Seoc added into their conversation. “Maybe next time we’ll do better, or at least be known for being the best at losing.” That got a laugh out of all of them.

by **Kaboomlandia** » Thu Nov 12, 2015 8:40 am

Phoenix rally for win against 66ers

The Kaboomlandia Phoenix got off to a strong start in the tenth International Baseball Slam, rallying from behind to defeat the Serbian Empire 66ers 8-5. Bernard Oliver started and pitched most of the game, pitching 7 and 2/3 innings, making 104 pitches, and allowing three earned runs. The Phoenix started badly, falling behind 3-0 in the top of the first inning before making it 3-2 after one. After a couple scoreless innings, the Serbs had three men on base after an Oliver walk:

"Here comes the pitch and it's hit! Going way back, left field wall...GREEN GOT IT! Ron Green makes a beautiful diving catch to keep Kaboomlandia in it!"

The game really was cracked open in the sixth inning when, with the Phoenix trailing 5-3, Jose McGuire stepped up:

"McGuire up at the plate, 2-2 count. Here comes the pitch and McGuire slams it! This is going way back and it is...GONE! A three-run blast by Jose McGuire and the Phoenix are up 6-5!"

Kaboomlandia would seal the game in the eighth inning with two more runs. The Phoenix are up next against unranked and unknown Camelone.

by **Frenline Delpha** » Thu Nov 12, 2015 1:25 pm

Cut-Off for Match Day 2

Group A
Schiltzberg Schiltz Burgers                 0 0 0 0 0 0 3 0 0  3
Nova Anglicana Lions                        0 2 0 1 0 0 2 0 X  5

Stuzemstazem Green Bulls                    0 1 1 0 1 1 1 0 1  6
Boatia Llamas                               0 0 1 0 0 0 2 1 1  5

Group A                                      Pld    W   L    RF   RA   RD   Pts 
1 Nova Anglicana Lions                         2    2   0    16    4  +12     6
2 Schiltzberg Schiltz Burgers                  2    1   1    10    6   +4     3
3 Stuzemstazem Green Bulls                     2    1   1     7   12   −5     3
4 Boatia Llamas                                2    0   2     6   17  −11     0

Group B
Torisakia Ice Birds                         0 1 0 1 4 0 0 0 0  6
Coconut Isle Dwarfs                         0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0  0

Shadownia Fruitbat Mafia                    0 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 0  1
Pulunia Redwhite                            0 1 0 2 0 0 0 2 X  5

Group B                                      Pld    W   L    RF   RA   RD   Pts 
1 Torisakia Ice Birds                          2    2   0    12    4   +8     6
2 Pulunia Redwhite                             2    1   1     6    6    0     3
3 Coconut Isle Dwarfs                          2    1   1     5    7   −2     3
4 Shadownia Fruitbat Mafia                     2    0   2     5   11   −6     0

Group C
Silvacometopia Sharks                       1 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 3  5
Pinoyistan Destoroyers                      0 0 0 0 0 2 0 0 0 0 0  2

San Llera San Llerans                       1 0 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 0  2
Abanhfleft Revolution                       1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 1 1  3

Group C                                      Pld    W   L    RF   RA   RD   Pts 
1 Silvacometopia Sharks                        2    2   0     9    2   +7     6
2 Abanhfleft Revolution                        2    2   0     6    2   +4     6
3 San Llera San Llerans                        2    0   2     2    7   −5     0
4 Pinoyistan Destoroyers                       2    0   2     2    8   −6     0

Group D
Kaboomlandia Phoenix                        1 0 2 2 2 2 0 3 0 12
Camelone Ultras                             1 0 2 0 0 0 1 0 0  4

The Serbian Empire 66ers                    0 2 0 0 0 1 0 1 1  5
Ruairikstan Ruarbears                       0 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0  1

Group D                                      Pld    W   L    RF   RA   RD   Pts 
1 Kaboomlandia Phoenix                         2    2   0    20    9  +11     6
2 The Serbian Empire 66ers                     2    1   1    10    9   +1     3
3 Camelone Ultras                              2    1   1    11   16   −5     3
4 Ruairikstan Ruarbears                        2    0   2     5   12   −7     0

by **South Yerfilag** » Thu Nov 12, 2015 1:28 pm

THE SLAM
International Baseball Slam - 10th Edition
Vortcom
Exclusive Broadcaster

IBS X- Everything Thread (IC)

[01] The South Yerfilag Eagles

[02] Starting Jitters...

[03] So, uh, we won a game.

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