World Baseball Classic 30 (EVERYTHING)

[Mosktopia]

MOSKTOPIA TEETERS ON BRINK OF ELIMINATION

Haventon, Super-Llamaland

---

After a narrow 4-2 win over the Fair Republic back in MD5, Mosktopia has gone on to lose two straight games to the Green Rovers (6-7) and Estope (8-5) respectively. With a losing record and only two games left in the qualifying stage, Mosktopia will need convincing wins in both of their remaining matches if they are to have any hope of progressing out of the group stage.

Aside from the surprisingly strong performance of the Estope team, Group C teams have been dismal failures. Other than Estope, no Group C team has a winning record or a positive run differential. With a 2-4 record and a +0 differential, Mosktopia is actually the current #2 team! With strong wins in their last two games, the Blue Dogs could still do enough to make it out of the group stage. But even a single loss would definitively close the door on Mosktopia's WBC 30.

Unfortunately, these next two games figure to be quite perilous. First Mosktopia will face the Levivanians, a squad who were sick in the team's first match-up but still managed to come away with a win when a group of Levivanian children took the field and got some help from friendly officials. Assuming the Levivanian national team actually shows up for the second game, no one is quite sure of what to expect. Assuming Mosktopia can get by Levivania, they will face a rematch with the top-ranked Fair Republic in a game that both teams need to win. Assuming both teams still have playoff aspirations by MD10, the final group stage game between Mosktopia and the Fair Republic should be very exciting to watch!

After a day of rest in which the team can get right and prepare for the upcoming group stage finish, Mosktopia will turn to tried-and-true veteran Sun Xaiotian and #2 pitcher Anthony Craig to keep the team in the hunt. Mosktopia fans around the world will be holding their breath to see if the Blue Dogs can turn what has been an utterly disappointing group stage into the comeback story of a lifetime.

[Zwangzug]

I think Dylan is taking this slump worse than even me. He was asking Lehrer if he even had to show up for the rest of the group stage. He phrased it in exactly those words, too, so Lehrer couldn't be like "you're not allowed to walk out on the team because we need you for the knockout stages." Instead, he reverted back to the usual spiel about how we have to be there to support each other. (Where by "support" the most practical implication could be "come in from the bullpen like the old team in case we run out of pitchers because I'm dumb," but for some reason Lehrer didn't want to phrase it that way.)

The saddest thing was seeing Lily have to try to calm Dylan down and remind him to stick around, not because she really likes him that much, but because she needs to stay on Lehrer's good side even longer for the next few seasons in Frischberg. Dylan, being distracted by everything, didn't seem to have thought through that, so he's just getting more and more fed up as to "why is Lily playing along with this," and meanwhile I'm trying to keep my head down and just blend in with the rest of the position players. Even Wesley is better company than Dylan at this point, if only because he's convinced himself that epic quests have been done and there's no way for him to go off in search of a secret weapon. Well, there's probably no time, at least.

Reinhold is, therefore, probably the least concerned about his starting spot being in jeopardy. It's not like he's hitting very well, but he's not much worse than the rest of us at this point. Defensively, I'm not sure if he's that good at calling pitches, but he's got a great arm for throwing people out. A couple attempted steals of second today, he had a really quick throw all the way there and even Noboru couldn't miss the tag. So, Corey was proud, you know, "way to gun 'em down!" And then Wesley got confused about "why are we talking about guns, those won't help." Corey had to just go, no, it's another foreign metaphor. I'd say Zwangzug need to get more of our own, but when we go with new strategies of our own they don't always work. Then again, when we go back to the common international way it doesn't work either. We're the problem.

Corey volunteers that "bow down"--like, a crossbow instead of a gun--only works when spoken out loud and doesn't make a lot of sense spelled out. Although I think we'd prefer to acknowledge the authority of Reinhold's throwing arm, rather than the legitimacy of whatever Wesley thinks would empower him to go on epic quests.

~Aja

[The Serbian Empire]

Serbs Lose, But One Game Away From Playoffs

That would be a Serbian Empire win or a Darvale loss in the next few days will secure Super-Llamaland and the Serbian Empire teams into the playoffs. Of course, yet again the Serbs will probably be the second fiddle that disappears quickly by the round of 16. Does it really matter anymore? Yes, but things aren't what they used to be.

I have lost the will to spit.
Simply nothing more to hit.
There is little more for me.
Need the beginning to set me free.

[Hicana]

1.) See 5.
2.) See 18.
3.) See 4.
4.) See 8.
5.) See 2.
6.) See 20.
7.) See 12.
8.) See 13.
9.) See 14.
10.) See 6.
11.) See 15.
12.) See 19.
13.) See 11.
14.) See 3.
15.) See 7.
16.) The Mist suck.
17.) See 16.
18.) See 10.
19.) See 17.
20.) See 9.

[Super-Llamaland]

Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven

Epic Quest: Inconceivable!

We fictionally represent, at times, other nations. If its your nation, then please take no offense on how its characterized. TG me with a brief character sketch if you want to be in it, but I may include you anyway.

Chapter Eight

El Diary of Guaya, as translated into English by amigos de Esportiva

Day 228

There are not many of us left in the Café. We drew straws yesterday to see who would go out to bring in more refugees from the area and generally keep watch. Three left, nobody has returned. All of them were killed by the high-ranked, we think.

---

Guaya yawned and put away the small notebook. The flickering candle-flame abruptly blew out, engulfing the room in darkness. The time seemed to be around nine o'clock at night, but nobody was sure. The clocks were all broken, and they had been. The day had burst with events. Someone had thrown a grenade into the café, wracking havoc in its back. Glo had barely driven away a Highranked (as they were now colloquially known) attack on the barricade. And the last of the coffee had ran out-they were surviving on grounds and instant.

A lonely radio cracked on a countertop. It had been there, transmitting dead silence, ever since the expedition party had left.

Beep.

Guaya glanced at it.

Kzzzhzhzhzhhhh...Esportiva Café, can you read me? This is UICA. Kzzzzzhzzh. *beep*

"Glo! Glo, wake up!"

The two padded over to the radio.

UICA base...kzzzhzhzhhh...refugees. Commerce Heights...kzzzzzzz...analyzed. Computerskzkzzzhzhhhh *beep*

"What?"

Cause...mutation...rank...RP...kzzzhhhh...*beep* Randomness destroyed...*beep* game theory kzzzhhhh altered *beep*

Static hissed.

"This is Glo of Esportiva Café!" Glo yelled desperately into the radio.

kzzzzhHHHKZKZZZHH *beep*

The static swelled, growing louder and louder. They could hear a frenzied shout. Then an explosion, a roaring pow, and then silence.

"Esportiva Café! Can you hear us!" Guaya yelled. There was silence.

The next morning, Guaya and Glo were chosen to go on recon.

---

Wolfie returned from a long, arduous feast to find the room empty and the bathroom door locked. He fell asleep, not thinking much of it.

---

Llama, however, had left the dinner early and was sick of it. He was fumbling with a lit fuse and a rubber mallet, adding them to the complex pile of parts in the sink to a chicken bone, a Campionato console stylus that had gone obsolete when they had switched to touch-screen two days after he had bought a high-end, $149 one, some wax, a small, hollow box, and a candle in the shape of a carefully whittled baseball bat, as most candles are.

"This is for Zwang," he muttered, fiddling with the parts, "this is for Baarlan," he murmured, firmly lodging the chicken bone in the candle, "this is for all of the nations that Fortunata has struck down at the WBC for no good reason." he grasped a rubber chicken chokingly firmly by the neck and swung it into the stylus. Llama wasn't experienced with the process in which one dispelled randomness, but he was fairly certain he had it right. He stacked the items in a pyramid and set the chicken on fire.

Choking and gasping for air an hour later, Llama slammed a hole through the emerald-colored, polished door, one shoe on fire and the other nowhere to be seen. As his shirt disintegrated into ash, he screamed and dove onto the bed, the bathroom behind him in chaos.

"Did--not--do that right!" he choked out, then fell unconscious.

[The Fair Republic]

Hi, this is Arlan Root reporting here from OuranosTech Field in Super-Llamaland where the Fair Republic Toucans have just defeated he The Emerald and Formerly Crystal Isles 5-2. Patrick Peterson threw seven strong inning for the win today, striking out 5 and allowing only 5 hits. His only blemish was a two run home run surrendered to Topaz Shine in the 5th Inning. The Toucans jumped out to a quick lead in the first inning as Gary Paytom hit a grand slam to left field just hitting off the foul pole to give the Toucans a 4-0 lead. An RBI double by Bob Benson in the 8th scored Larry Donaldson and gave the Toucans a much needed insurance run heading into the final inning. Max Wilder retired the side in order in the 9th inning, getting the save and the win for a team that badly needed one. Around the group, Estope is still undefeated after an 8-5 slug fest over Mosktopia and Levivania enjoyed a day off before he rematch with the Toucans who they defeated rather easily 5-1 the last time these two teams met. The Toucans are starting to have some stability after a wild first half of the group stage. The pitching after being so inconsistent for the first half of the group stage have has seemed to calm down and find a rhythm just in time for the Toucans to fight for the final spot to get past the group stage. Buck Naters is starting tomorrow for the Toucans. The 26 year old southpaw was just ok the last time out vs The Emerald and Formerly Crystal Isles, he did enough for the win but against more experienced teams like Estope or Mosktpia he would have been in trouble. Thats all the time we have, Will the Toucans avenge the loss to Levivania? Tune in tomorrow to find out!

[New Montreal States]

PATISTAN: WHAT THE HELL?

An in-depth look at the surprise juggernaut of Group E

SUPER-LLAMALAND - Everyone had Patistan at 5-1 and one win away from a guaranteed spot in the playoffs, right?

You can't predict baseball, and you double-extra-special can't predict baseball over a piddling eight games. But the system, however unrepresentative, is the system, and Patistan is flourishing. So how are they doing it?

Patistan has declined to provide a roster, so we had to put on our journalism shoes and go investigate the side. What we found was a surprising cast of characters, put together for a sprint, not a marathon. What Patistan's doing couldn't possibly be sustained over 154 games - or even a third of that - but is perfectly suited for a tournament as short and disjointed as a WBC with an 8-game group stage. Here's some of the highlights from the Presse-Journal Devoir's investigation:

- Patistan's ace pitcher is the second son of the founder and head researcher of Patistan's number 1 steroid, amphetamines, and painkiller maker.
- Their second baseman has founded his own religion, an eclectic combination of the Church of England, Santeria, Sikhism and Mao Zedong Thought. He stages pregame rituals in the locker room where he anoints the starting lineup with goat blood and encourages them to "struggle against the rightest, running pig-dog capitalist-roaders" - better known as every starting pitcher in the sport of baseball. He has also called for baseball to be "socialized" with every player taking it in turns to pitch to individual batters.
- Their backup catcher moonlights as a male escort named "Jacky Meatcakes." He's wanted for money laundering - under that alias - in at least six different jurisdictions.
- One of their relievers has fifteen kids by eleven different women, with a set of triplets on the way.
- Another reliever writes erotic romance novels for the over 65-set under the pseudonym "Mildred Manningham."
- Their closer took a vow of silence and hasn't spoken in six years and seven months. He also hasn't shaved.
- Their "bench coach" is a styrofoam takeover box with half a pork kabob and some rice pilaf.
- Finally, their manager is a birthday clown whose shtick consisted of drinking heavily on his way to gigs, then doing Jeremy Jaffacake impressions. Apparently that's what the kids are into these days, at least in Patistan.

So where will this get them? They're already in post position for the top spot in the group. We expect them to run the table until they run into the hosts in the playoffs, at which point animal rights activists will catch up with the second baseman, and karma will catch up with the rest of them.

[United Eastedge]

Hopes still alive for United Eastedge
Jimmerson, Zircasia, New Wolfopolis

---

Erik Schultz's team have been criticized quite a bit since they began performing bad games against teams like Super-Llamaland and The Serbian Empire. As we have said a lot of times, United Eastedge is currently in a bad situation and that's clearly reflected on the standings due to a 2-3 record. Although yesterday's result of the game between The Serbian Empire and Lymantatia was a bit helpful for us, our team needs to win the three games remaining of the group stage if they want to keep alive in the competition. Our next opponent is Super-Llamaland that currently has a 4 game winning streak after been defeated by Darvale in their first game.

Tonight's billboard of the exciting Group L, are United Eastedge Vs. Super-Llamaland and Lymantatia Vs. Darvale. We have several predictions for both game and we know exactly how would the results help our team jump a position in the standings. Obviously, United Eastedge needs to win against Super-Llamaland, which is a very difficult test for them and the second team that needs to happen, is that Lymantatia defeat Darvale to tie their possible 3-3 record. Let's recognize that Super-Llamaland is clearly the favorite team to win this game, although it is possible to defeat them and a good proof of that is the last game, in which United Eastedge depressed the Tigers during the nine innings and they almost defeated them, but the experience emerged victorious.

However, everything can happen today. It is a matter of wait what happens tonight and pray all day long for our team, But if they can't hit the knockout stage, our time, broadcasts and reports will be directly dedicated to the Eastedgean Olympic Qualifiers, which will start on June 6th, announced recently by the United Eastedge Olympic Committee. Alright, have a good night and keep participating for those round trips to the final series of the World Baseball Classic. Good-bye and Go Eastedge!

[Super-Llamaland]

Group A
Nova Anglicana 5, Jecatria 4 (F/13)
Diegstra 4, Jeckland 11
   Team                P  W D  L For  Ag +/- Pts
 1 Jeckland            7  6 0  1  40  23  +17  18
 2 Nova Anglicana      6  4 0  2  31  29  +2  12
 3 Diegstra            7  3 0  4  34  39  -5  9
 4 Jecatria            6  2 0  4   15  20  -5  6
 5 Zwangzug            6  1 0  5   25  34 -9  3
Group B
Vaugania 6, The Kytler Peninsulae 0
New South Aqmuland 3, Kinzar 6 (F/13)
   Team                       P  W D  L For  Ag +/- Pts
 1 The Kytler Peninsulae      6  5 0  1  29   22 +7  15
 2 Saugeais                   6  4 0  2  35  29  +6  12
 3 Kinzar                     7  4 0  3  26  29  -3  12
 4 Vaugania                   6  3 0  3  24  14  +10  9
 5 New South Aqmuland         6  0 0  7  27  49 -22  0
Group C
The Fair Republic 1, Levivania 5
The Emerald and Formerly Crystal Isles 9, Estope 7
   Team                                        P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Estope                                      7  6 0  1  55  38   +17  18
 2 Levivania                                   6  3 0  3  24  28   -4   9
 3 The Emerald and Formerly Crystal Isles      7  3 0  4  34  40  -6   9
 4 Mosktopia                                   6  2 0  4  30  30   +0   6
 5 The Fair Republic                           6  2 0  4  19  26   -7   6
Group D
New Wolfopolis 5, Royal Kingdom of Quebec 6
Allamunnic States 8, Imota 0
   Team                         P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Allamunnic States            7  5 0  2  45  28  +17  15
 2 Equestrian States            6  5 0  1  42  28   +14  15
 3 Royal Kingdom of Quebec      6  4 0  2  36  32   +4  12
 4 New Wolfopolis               6  1 0  5  25  32   -7  3
 5 Imota                        6  1 0  6   15  43  -28  3
Group E
New Montreal States 0, Yttribia 4
Orennana 2, Patistan 11
   Team                     P  W D  L For  Ag +/- Pts
 1 Patistan                 7  6 0  1  40  21  +19  18
 2 Yttribia                 6  4 0  2  28   23  +5  12
 3 Orennana                 7  3 0  4  28  42  -14  9
 4 New Montreal States      6  2 0  4  20  19  +1  6
 5 Sicoutimont              6  1 0  5   10  23  -13  3
Group F
The Royal Barangay 2, Unolia 3
Zenic 1, Mochria 2
   Team                    P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Mochria                 7  4 0  3  24  26   -2  12
 2 Unolia                  6  4 0  2   18  20   -2  12
 3 Zenic                   7  3 0  4  31   26  +5  9
 4 Karditan                6  3 0  3  16  18   -2  9
 5 The Royal Barangay      6  2 0  4   19  23  -4  6

[Nassau-Hessen]

Nassau Hessen 9, Alitaba 2
We did it, we really did it

Nassau is in to win Group J. Their quest received a major boost through a win against Alitaba, who was the current undefeated leader. Leonardo Juarez, who had a shutout in his previous game, was on the mound for the Eagles against Alitaba. Jose Panibugho was on the mound for the Alitaba Mariners. This game had a fairly higher value than last game, considering there was only four rounds left. Brannigan was not totally packed, but it received a healthy attendance nonetheless.

Both pitchers completed a successful first inning with no points on either end of the scoreboard. They gave a combined four strikeouts with only six outs needed. After the first inning, the Nassau offense got down to business in the second. Jarlson and Flint got singles while Handival was walked. The bases loaded situation led Victor Casfeld to pop a ball over Right Fielder Apolinario Macatuli's head. The well timed hit barely sent all base runners besides Victor home. Isaac Mac Dougal was able to bat Casfeld in by the end of the inning, making the score four to nothing.

In the fifth inning, the Mariners were able to respond by a double from Rajah Amansinaya that drove in Sultan Samudi Bakir, who got on base by a long single and a successful steal. The Mariners gradually pulled the score to 4-1. Nassau got a solo home run from Charles Trent to put the score back to a four point lead. The Eagles and the Mariners were refrained from scoring in the sixth from good pitching.

The seventh inning presented opportunities for both teams, as each got a person on third base, but the offensive efforts were fruitless and the score remained 5-1. In the eighth inning, Nassau committed an error by Darius Rosario, who threw the ball WAY over the head of Albert Jarlson. The batter, Rajah Amansinaya, easily advanced to third and was batted in by Dato Alinsaga Datumanong, making the score 5-2. In the bottom half of the inning put all doubts of the final result away. Nassau did the unthinkable, and lo and behold, Isaac Mac Dougal made a Grand Slam, barely crossing the fence in center field.

Rick Chalmers was given a chance at relieving and successfully won the game. Leonardo Juarez got seven innings and a win under his belt as he improved his record to two wins and no losses in the tournament. Franklin Burgeone got an inning, and is intended to be used more often. The final stretch has started, and a win would make Nassau advance, while a loss would be fairly damaging. The game against the Organized States will be critical, and the Eagles will get a shot at revenge.

[New Wolfopolis]

Group G
Cassadaigua 1, Mizuyuki 3
Brenecia 2, Thatius 3

   Team             P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Thatius          7  6 0  1  29  19  +10  18
 2 Brenecia         7  4 0  3  38  28  +10  12
 3 Cassadaigua      6  3 0  3  24  27   -3   9
 4 Mizuyuki         6  3 0  3  28  22   +6   9
 5 Hicana           6  0 0  6  17  40  -23   0

Group H
Milchama 7, Vettrera 5
Cosumar 4, Noburu Taiyou 6

   Team                         P  W D  L For  Ag +/- Pts
 1 Cosumar                      7  4 0  3  33  28  +5  12
 2 Vettrera                     6  3 0  3  24  33  -9   9
 3 Milchama                     6  3 0  3  29  30  -1   9
 4 Feministvs Sanctvsterra      6  3 0  3  29  27  +2   9
 5 Noburu Taiyou                7  3 0  4  34  31  +3   9

Group I 
Ko-oren 7, Western Cuba 5 (F/10)
Falupia 2, Crystal Empire 3

   Team                P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Darmen              6  5 0  1  35  24  +11  15
 2 Crystal Empire      7  3 0  4  28  29   -1   9
 3 Ko-oren             6  3 0  3  31  20  +11   9
 4 Falupia             7  3 0  4  28  48  -20   9
 5 Western Cuba        6  2 0  4  13  14   -1   6

Group J 
Maklohi Vai 0, Cuthbert Islands 7
Organized States 5, Nassau-Hessen 1

   Team                  P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Alitaba               6  5 0  1  30  18  +12  15
 2 Nassau-Hessen         7  4 0  3  27  23   +4  12
 3 Cuthbert Islands      6  3 0  3  18   6  +12   9
 4 Organized States      7  3 0  4  21  27   -6   9
 5 Maklohi Vai           6  1 0  5   8  30  -22   3

Group K 
Gregoryisgodistan 5, New North Aqmuland 2 (F/10)
Mount Tamobet 3, Britonisea 1

   Team                    P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Mount Tamobet           7  4 0  3  30  43  -13  12
 2 San Jose Guayabal       6  4 0  2  24  22   +2  12
 3 Britonisea              7  4 0  3  38  25  +13  12
 4 Gregoryisgodistan       6  3 0  3  36  26  +10   9
 5 New North Aqmuland      6  1 0  5  17  29  -12   3

Group L 
Super-Llamaland 3, United Eastedge 4
Darvale 5, Lymantatia 6

   Team                    P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Super-Llamaland         6  4 0  2  35  23  +12  12
 2 The Serbian Empire      6  4 0  2  30  21   +9  12
 3 Darvale                 7  3 0  4  36  37   -1   9
 4 United Eastedge         6  3 0  3  28  27   +1   9
 5 Lymantatia              7  2 0  5  27  48  -21   6

[Jeckland]

WHAT THE FUCK?

Well, this is weird. We qualified for the second round of the WBC. Again.

Baseball isn't even really a thing in Jeckland. There are a few players, and we managed to assemble a team for WBC 29, which somehow made the round of 20 before eventually meeting their inevitable demise. Well, we thought. That went well, so we'll send them off again. And so we did.

Our first match was against Jecatria, which was rather fierce given the whole referendum thing, but the Spuds played well and ran out comfortable 5-2 winners. Then the shocks started. A last gasp 7-6 win over perennial heavyweights Zwnagzug lay down the gauntlet. This Jeckland team were not a fluke. Then they played the other team to have won their first two matches, Digestra, and thumped them 8-2 to put us in command at the top of the group. Then came the setback. Nova Anglicana beating us 7-3. This was when questions were raised about our durability, how long we could keep up this streak.

The Spuds then eased to another victory over Jecatria, but the real test came with the next game against a struggling Zwangzug. 3-1. This team was for real. And now only needed a win to qualify. Digestra was the next opponent. And they were hammered 11-4! Now, all Jeckland needs to do is beat Nova Anglicana to win the group. Even if they lost, Nova Anglicana would need to win their other game as well. The Jeckish baseball team rocks! Perhaps we should pay them.

[Gregoryisgodistan]

"NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA BAT SLAVES! NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA BAT SLAVES! BAT SLAVES! BAT SLAVES! BAT SLAVES!"

"Hello, I'm Sportscaster 1938XXB and we are coming to you live from New Wolfopolis for today's World Baseball Classic game between Gregoryisgodistan and New North Aqmuland. The Bat Slaves look to win their second straight and get back to .500. They're almost certainly going to need to win out if they want to advance to the knockout stage of this tournament. New North Aqmuland was too incompetent to post a roster, so we will have to make up fake and highly insulting names for them. They will send Doodle Face to the mound to oppose the young lefty Technical Support Specialist A8DHH1938DH. The Bat Slaves are the nominal "road" team and will bat first. Leading off is Shirtmaker 9DHUAS. He swings and grounds it to short. Ugly Pineapple fields, throws to first, in time one away.

...

"Top of the fourth, runner on third and one out for Executioner 9D8AH. Runner breaks for home, it's a suicide squeeze, perfectly done down the third base line. Foofoo Bunny only has one play, that's to first, and Executioner 9D8AH is out for the second out but a run comes home and it's 1-0 Bat Slaves here at the UNI Dome.

...

"Bottom of the seventh, Bunny Wunny at the plate for New North Aqmuland, second and third, two out and he lines it into right for a base hit. Ugly Pineapple will score. Rounding third and heading for home is Foofoo Bunny, here's the throw, he is safe. Wunny will take second on the throw and it's 2-1 New North Aqmuland.

...

"Top 9, Bat Slaves down to their last out of the game, and here is Enemy Crusher Bobby Furgles. The pitch is hit deep to left, DROP THAT BALL ON COSTA LUNA BECAUSE IT IS A BOMB! HOME RUN! WE ARE ALL TIED UP! The closer Losing Foolhead hung a curve and Enemy Crusher Bobby Furgles took full advantage, crushing it into the left field seats for a solo home run. What a blast.

...

"Bottom 9, two outs, still 2-2. Here is Fooling Himself at the dish. He swings and misses for strike three and we have some bonus baseball here at the UNI-Dome. Gregoryisgodistan and New North Aqmuland heading to extra innings. This should be fun.

"Leading off the top of the 10th is Lumberjack JSUUSI99387. He swings and loops it into center, that will drop in for a base hit. Lumberjack JSUUSI99387 is aboard with nobody out. Now at the plate is Grammar Enforcement Officer CUPSI19291. He hits a slow roller to third. Only one play, that's to first, runner moves to second, there's one out.


...

"3-1 count on Cow Herder BYD1727, high for ball four. First and second, one out. And it looks like we will see a pinch hitter for Executioner 9D8AH. It will be Slavecatcher LA1929ZBA coming off the bench. The young lefty takes a pitch on the inside corner for strike 1. Here's the 0-1. Drilled deep to right - DROP THAT BALL ON COSTA LUNA BECAUSE IT IS A BOMB! THREE RUN HOME RUN! Slavecatcher LA1929ZBA pinch hits and drills it deep and gone to put the Bat Slaves up 5-2.

...

"Bottom of the 10th now, and Chef SHSUUAISSADF on to close it out. Here's Foofoo Bunny leading it off. He swings and misses for strike 1. The 0-1 is called strike inside corner on the fastball, 0-2. Here comes the 0-2, slider in the dirt, Foofoo Bunny guesses wrong and swings and misses for strike 3. The catcher will tag him out and there is one down. Here comes Bunny Wunny. He pops it up to second. Easy play for Shirtmaker 9DHUAS and there are two down. That will bring up Stupid Nose. And Nose grounds it to third. Grammar Enforcement Officer CUPSI19291 fields, fires across the diamond and that will do it. Bat Slaves win. Next up is Britonisea tomorrow night. We will see you then."

[Ko-oren]

Decision Day and Decision Decision Day

Two games separate the Dragonfly-outs from either a continuation of last WBC, which ended in a top 8 spot, or a continuation of the WBC before that, which was an honorless exit after the group stage. We know that any team is powerful, and that any team has a chance, and it's high time for our chance to come. We have had a few bad games and many losses we should have turned around into a victory, but with two games left against the toughest opponents in this group, it's now or never for the Greenblues.

Game 7: Away at Crystal Empire

Crystal Empire, second behind Darmen in Group I. Like us, they currently have three wins, only they have a bye game on the last day. Basically, the winner of this game is very likely to finish second, and thus earning a place among the final 24. In other words: a loss tomorrow, and we can kiss the next round goodbye.

Something that can aid us in our game at Crystal Empire is the sheer number of runs they allow. Our batters haven't been powerless at all in the previous six games, and this could lead to a nice score tomorrow. Their offense is good, comparable to ours, so we need everything that Sayar and his fellows can give us tomorrow. Yes, contrary to the starting rotation, Sayar is starting tomorrow.

Game 8: Home against Darmen

Then the last game against Darmen. Based on the previous round, this entire game might not matter anymore. Anyhow, we want some revenge for what has happened to our team until so far, and we might even finish first in the group: for that, we do require the Darmeni to drop tomorrow's game. Not likely, but possible. And possible is all that the WBC requires to make something happen.

The Darmeni are phenomenal in both offense and defense: we have allowed less runs, but the Darmeni are not bad either. Their offense is scary: 35 runs in six games. Again, other teams in other groups have done better, but 35 is higher than any other team in our group.

The home advantage might be exactly what keeps us in the World Baseball Classic.

-------------

Do you want to work in a stress-freeneutral environment? Apply for the position of KSN presenter today!

[Patistan]

Now i do something

The Patistan National Baseball Team

Style Modifier: +2
Captain: Chaudary Aslam

Roster

Rotation

1: Chaudary Aslam, Age:(27)
2: Shaheer Sharif,(19)
3: Ramish George,(87)

Bullpen

CL: LOLman (You can check the birth certificate)(16)
MR: Hussain Islam(25)
LR: Sami Soori(11)

Batting Order

SS: Chaudary Aslam(27)
2B: Tauheed Raja(101)
3B: Mobeen Aslam(25)
CF: Jamal Kamal(37)
1B: Saddiqq Yehud(45)
C: Rashid Ajmal(29)
LF: Adrian Qui(108)
RF: Aly Hirji(23)
(Pitcher)

Bench

C: Shabaz Tamour(18)
IF: ROFLMAN(thats his real name)(98)
OF: Bilal Saqib(12)

.

RP Permissions

Code: Select all

I give my opponent permission to:
My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my runscorers: Yes
Choose my lineup: No
Follow my pitching rotation: Yes
Godmod scoring events: No
RP injuries to my players: No
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Eject my players: No
Godmod other events: No

[The Serbian Empire]

Got To Keep Them Separated

What happened? Well we have to see what happens tonight, but someone has sent a message that the Serbian Empire's batsman will be target for hit by pitch. I suspect this might result in a bench clearing brawl which might be the most exciting thing we have seen all Classic long. Hopefully this will not happen, but the lack of rakija has made the Serbs a bit more irritable than usual. It only makes matters worse that one of the players has had to be benched due to alcoholic tremors due to withdrawal symptoms from lack of alcohol. It's unknown when he'll be healthy enough to return to the field as anything more than a DH as these tremors will hurt his fielding more than anything else.

[Mochria]

OT: Good evening, Mochrians, and welcome to the second edition of World Baseball Classic Live, which apparently happens whenever Colin wants it to. I'm Oswald Thatendswald, generic anchorman for everything in this country, and I'm joined by coach of the Mochria Reindeer baseball team, Colin Marine. Colin, how are you feeling?

CM: ♫ Birds flying high, You know how I feel ♫

OT: Uh, actually, coach, if I could stop you there... I don't know how you feel, that's why I asked.

CM: I'm Feeling Good! That's the song!

OT: You could've just said that.

CM: I was getting there, if you would've let me finish the song...

OT: Oh well, that's beyond the point. The point is, your Reindeer are in first!

CM: Damn right.

OT: You defeated first-place Zenic to get there!

CM: Damn right.

OT: You have one more game, against the Royal Barangay.

CM: Damn right.

OT: You guys going to win that game?

CM: Damn right.

OT: Even though they're the World Number One?

CM: Damn right.

OT: You beat them earlier in the classic, didn't you?

CM: Damn right.

OT: But you've gone 1-2 since then.

CM: Damn right.

OT: And they've gone 2-1.

CM: Damn right.

OT: Are you going to say anything besides "damn right"?

CM: Damn right.

OT: When will that be?

CM: When you give me a question that isn't easy to answer with "damn right."

OT: Fair enough. So, what's your strategy for the next match?

CM: Well, we've just got to bring our best stuff. Certainly, the Indios are a good team, but we are too. We've been doing better than they have this Classic. Puffy Dontneedcombs will be our starter, facing off against Cyril Sumaoang. If we win, we're in the playoffs. If we lose, our playoff hopes are in jeopardy. We've got the motivation, we just put ourselves in first place again. I think our guys know that we can win, and they'll bring everything they have. We'll have to see how it goes, but we certainly have a good shot.

OT: What do you have to say about the fact that New Wolfopolis is doing worse than Mochria?

CM: Well, every team has their good years, and every team has their bad years. Obviously, this is a bad year for New Wolfopolis. After this group of players had built the foundation for a very good team, they got complacent and started expecting to win, instead of using the fire of uncertainty as they did in their earlier years. That is not helpful. Our players don't take anything for granted. They work their butts off every day. New Wolfopolis might be doing this as well, but, the WBC has been pretty random lately. We'll see how it goes, but they're eliminated, and we're in first in our group. Just sayin'.

OT: Thank you. Colin Marine, head coach of the first-place Mochria Reindeer. When we come back, we'll have played against The Royal Barangay. See you after the game!

[Gregoryisgodistan]

OOC: The security level RED FLASH is so top-secret that nobody except Lord Almighty Gregory and his Security Chief know it exists. There is absolutely no way for a message sent RED FLASH to be intercepted. So don't try it.

To: Lord Almighty Gregory
From: Security Chief James Samuelson
Subject: Operation False Flag

Since New Wolfopolis still refuses to release Pervert Chaser NAUSJW, it is time to launch Operation False Flag. In case you forget, the intent of Operation False Flag is to destroy several Gregoryisgodistani landmarks and blame it on another country, in this case New Wolfopolis. This will both gather international sympathy and create an excuse to add New Wolfopolis to our Enemy List. I would recommend targeting Lord Almighty Gregory National Stadium, Lord Almighty Gregory Baseball Stadium and the public beach in District 30, Ward 4. The first two are major national landmarks but are not currently being used. The last would result in mass casualties while causing minimal property damage. At your discretion, commence with the plan.

End Message.

BREAKING: Wolfopian Terrorists Attack Gregoryisgodistan

Earlier today, in a coordinated series of attacks, Wolfopian citizens terrorists destroyed or damaged several prominent Gregoryisgodistani locations and killed 1,391 citizens in a beachside bombing. At the stroke of noon, the terrorists detonated approximately 25 bombs inside Lord Almighty Gregory National Stadium, severely damaging the structure. Parts of the stadium collapsed and others caught fire. It is expected that the damage will prevent the stadium from hosting any soccer or football matches until at least the start of World Cup 70 qualification, possibly later. Only a couple minutes later, while police were en route to the National Stadium, the terrorists blew up Lord Almighty Gregory Baseball Stadium with several tons of explosives detonated remotely. In this case, the stadium completely collapsed and will have to be rebuilt from scratch. It is unclear when this will happen or where Gregoryisgodistan's baseball team will play in the meantime. WBC 30 is currently taking place exclusively in Super-Llamaland and New Wolfopolis. The Bat Slaves have been drawn into a Wolfopian group and are expected to remain there for the duration of the tournament in spite of the security threat. They are expected to participate in International Baseball Slam VI in between cycles. It is unclear if that will include games in all participating nations, and if so, where the Bat Slaves will play.

However, the worst attack was yet to come. Around 1 PM, the remaining terrorists started detonating a series of explosives along the beach in District 30, Ward 4, as citizens were enjoying the beautiful afternoon. The explosives started near the lifeguard chair and continued down the beach in a staggered line for about half a mile, one right after the other. Within two minutes, they were all detonated. The citizens didn't even have time to react. 1,391 of them were killed, and 2,109 of them were injured. The death toll is expected to rise since many injured are in critical condition, near death.

Lord Almighty Gregory gave a speech around 2:00 PM. The transcript is below.

Transcript:

"Good afternoon, ladies, gentlemen, and slaves. Earlier today, Wolfopian terrorists launched multiple attacks on Gregoryisgodistani soil, destroying several stadiums and killing over a thousand beachgoers enjoying the beautiful weather. It will take a long time to rebuild the damage, and the life lost will never return. Our intelligence immediately reported that the terrorists were of Wolfopian origin and backed by the government, as indicated by the identification police found on their person. This was later confirmed by enhanced interrogation methods. Rose Cho, the President of New Wolfopolis, sent them to attack us as punishment for our attempts to get Pervert Chaser NAUSJW back after his heroic acts.

"As a result, I have no choice but to add New Wolfopolis to our Enemy List. This is a major unprovoked attack on Gregoryisgodistani soil. These attacks must stop or we will have war. Just give us Pervert Chaser NAUSJW back immediately and we can call this even. It really isn't, but I want to stay out of war for now. Therefore, I call upon the Wolfopian government to release Pervert Chaser NAUSJW immediately or we will launch a full-scale military invasion. Given the events that transpired today, I expect I will have full international support behind us. Destroying national landmarks and killing over a thousand innocent civilians all because you don't want to return Pervert Chaser NAUSJW to us is unacceptable. You must concede to our demands at once or face dire consequences.

"To all families who lost loved ones today, you have my sincerest condolences. The terrorists who attacked us have already been brought to justice, having been sliced to death very slowly and painfully with the brownie cutter of death, one by one. This way, they had to watch their co-conspirators die before being executed. They practically begged to be killed first so they didn't have to watch it. We were nice and executed the more cooperative ones first. They were begging for it, so we gave in to their request. After all, they did tell us what we needed to know.

"Good night, ladies and gentlemen. May New Wolfopolis not attack you in your sleep. Death to New Wolfopolis!"

OOC2: In case you couldn't tell, the "Wolfopian attack" was really a false flag and there were no terrorists arrested or executed. But everyone in Gregoryisgodistan believes it was real.

[Nova Anglicana]

Lions Survive Another Extra-Inning Battle

Allen Talos, Londinium Courier

For the second straight game, the Nova Anglicana Lions found themselves heading to extra innings against an unranked team, but this time it was against Jecatria, a team they had defeated easily the first time around. #5 starter Nate Freeman took the hill against Jecatria, and retired 12 of the first 13 batters he faced, including six strikeouts. His blazing fastball sat 95-97 MPH and even clocked 99 as he struck out the Jecatrian cleanup hitter with a runner on second. He mixed that with an effective curveball and changeup to baffle the Jecatrian hitters through the first four innings. In the 5th, he held a 2-0 lead, courtesy of a two-run double from Tony Barnes in the 1st inning. Unfortunately, Freeman came unhinged in the bottom of the inning. Freeman threw a two-strike 96 MPH fastball that he believed caught the outside corner and pumped his fist, only for the umpire to call it a ball. Freeman jawed with the umpire and was warned. The next pitch, a fastball straight down the pipe, was smashed into left-center for a double. He then proceeded to walk the bases loaded in his frustration. It seemed he might escape when he struck out the #8 hitter and the pinch-hitter, but the leadoff hitter smacked a two-run single and the #2 man followed with an RBI single of his own, giving Jecatria the lead. Freeman got the #3 hitter on a pop fly, but the damage had been done and the Lions trailed. Freeman departed after six innings having allowed three runs on five hits and three walks with nine strikeouts.

Kareem Al-Aniz would pound a solo homer into the stands to tie the game at 3 in the 7th (the Lions' first hit since the 1st), but Donté Smiley surrendered a home run of his own in the bottom of the inning. In the 9th, Jarrod Novak singled home Roman Jennings from third to tie the ballgame at 4. It would remain that way until the top of the 13th. Lance Manning led off with a bunt single, and advanced to second on a wild pitch. Josh Heckman grounded out to the right side, and Roman Jennings lifted a fly ball deep enough for Manning to score. In the bottom of the inning, with Jamey Conroy available, manager Graig Lowman elected to give Danny Hauser the shot at closing. Conroy had barely survived the Diegstra game, throwing a good number of pitches and looking shaky. We'll probably see him in the Jeckland game if necessary, but Hauser did a fine job filling in. Using his 98 MPH fastball and hard 12-6 curveball exclusively, he struck out two of the four batters he faced, permitting only a walk. Hauser got the Lions through a sealed the victory, but don't expect him to see many more chances like this one.

The Lions play Jeckland next, in a pivotal game for them. Though they have a healthy 1.5 game lead on their next competitor (Diegstra), a MD10 faceoff with Zwangzug could easily drop them to 4-4 if they lose to Jeckland here. Additionally, with a win against Jeckland and against Zwangzug, the Lions would finish 6-2 and in first by virtue of H2H tiebreak against Jeckland. Tune in on StateSports1 at 19:00, and root the Lions to victory!

[United Eastedge]

Life-flavored victory against Super-Llamaland
Jimmerson, Zircasia, New Wolfopolis

---

Yesterday the National Baseball Team, faced the powerful team of Super-Llamaland in a great game full of exciting moments and literally, a party in the crowd at the Cromartie Center. As you can see, Erik Schultz's team has bounced back according to their current record of 3-3 and they are alive yet. Although they just bounced back after this game, they can be eliminated tonight against The Serbian Empire, but tonight we just need a bit of luck and a good performance to still struggling for a ticket to the knockout stage.

United Eastedge began the game at bat against the hard pitcher, R Drew Gilson Jr., the youngest starting pitcher MVP in Llamanean history in 2013. As you can see in the scoreboard, he was completely dominating all the batters of United Eastedge during the first three innings allowing only one hits in a whole hour of game. The Tigers opened the scoreboard in the bottom of the second with an amazing hit-based play, in which they loaded the three bases placing Morrison in a worrying situation. Then, with two outs on the board and a full count of 3-2, C Michael Trabajen single on a line drive to the right field driving Aaron Baxter to home as well. After two completed innings, Super-Llamaland was winning the game again, 1-0.

The tying run would come in the top of the fourth with powerful home run on a fly ball drive to the center field and it was impossible for Megan Peterson to catch that ball even after climbing the wall. It was the firts hit that Gilson Jr. allowed after a three-inning perfect game in a manner of speaking. Anyways, the scoreboard was tied 1-1 after three and a half inning completed increasing the hopes of United Eastedge.

After one inning and half boring innings without runs, Super-Llamaland took advantage of the remarkable fatigue that had the starting pitcher, Morrison after 5.2 innings throwing. The consequence of this situation was that Super-Llamaland scored two runs more with a home run by the Llamanean third base man, Peter Camden driving him and Trevor Matthews to home shattering the hopes of Erik Schultz's team. The partial result at that point was 3-1, Super-Llamaland's favor.

Finally in the last two innings, United Eastedge scored 3 runs more to turn the results in their favor with two hit and run at bats in the eight inning made by Cameron Terry and Wayne Douglas hitting a single and a double respectively. WIth only one out in the board and a man in third and second base, the panorama seemed quite good for the Eastedgean team. The third base man, Kent Webb, doubled on a ground ball drive to the left field and driving his mates to home tying the scoreboard 3-3. After the ninth inning, it seemed that the game would extend to extra innings, but the designated hitter, Victor Riley homered on a fly ball dirve to the right field, literally causing a madness in Cromartie Center...

There are two ways or directions that the standings can take after tonight's games. There is a good one for all of the Eastedgean fans and obviously there is a disastrous one. The best thing for us that can happen tonight, is that Lymantatia defeat the Tigers and of course that our team achieve the victory against their similar of The Serbian Empire. Do not forget about our live transmission on tonigh's game, we all hope that you enjoy it. Good-bye and Go Eastedge!

[Super-Llamaland]

Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight


Epic Quest: Look left! ->

We fictionally represent, at times, other nations. If its your nation, then please take no offense on how its characterized. TG me with a brief character sketch if you want to be in it, but I may include you anyway.

Chapter Nine

---

Llama was wandering the palace, whereupon he accidentally entered and found himself on the outskirts of Margaret's Palace. The scenery radiated beauty. He saw the entire mountain stretching beneath him, millions of people, ant-sized from his height, living out their lives below. Mirasaia was a beautiful place. Llama also concluded that there was absolutely no way he was in the same dimension as before.

Somebody tapped him on the back. This wouldn't have been too shocking had the hand not been clawed.

"Gah!" he yelled, leaping forward and sprawling onto his face. It was the kind of sprawl that action directors would mutter "Take 596" after.

He heard the flap of wings, and then everything went red and scaly.

"Helllp!" he yelled, but no, they were ripping him apart, he could feel his shirt going, he couldn't breathe, everything smelled of hot reptile, and now-

"Llama?" somebody replied.

"Wait, who is that?" he couldn't place it above so much wing-beats and the crackle of fire.

"Nexxus!" came the yell back. "Guys, get off him! He's my friend!"

"I'm not on anyone- oh, you're talking to them. Okay."

The creatures drew back. He could see once again.

"Nexxus? The heck? I thought you were dead!"

"Apparently not." he was most decidedly different, i.e. red-scales-covering-body-plus-horns-and-a-tail different. "...erm, if you aren't bothered by me asking..."

"Course not, but it's too long for standing out here. Come in or something."

"Can we do this in my room? It's in..." he gestured to the castle which took up about half of the sky behind him. "...you, uh, know," he concluded lamely.

Nexxus shrugged. "Can't. Dracons are forbidden to enter the palace. Not that we'd want to get any closer to that evil witch anyway."

"Ah, so they placed a curse on you?"

"No, it's just that we don't have the key."

"Well, the door's open...and if you want to, I think Margaret desires some roasting..."

They prepared for battle.

---

A bored Wolfie sat down behind a large, smooth object, resting his back on it. He stretched out and began to take a nap.

"I feel like there's something behind my throne," Margaret told Greg, who shrugged and pretended to not hear the very distinct snoring from behind said golden chair. Suddenly, there came the sound of a trumpet fanfare, resonating off of the golden walls.

"Cavalry Commander Tistan has captives!" somebody shouted. There clamored a great huzzah throughout the metal halls. A green-clad soldier riding a bay horse entered from a far entrance to added cheers. Behind were two unidentifiable captives. For once, the crowd was right.

Wolfie awoke, realized where he was, wondered towards the whereabouts of Llama, then kept silent, listening.

"Queen Margaret!" Tistan saluted.

"Commander Patrick," the queen said atop her throne, "how are you?"

"Well," the green-clad commander replied, "we located eight thieves hiding in the lower reaches of Apomirasaia Palace." he gestured with a flourish to the two. Wolfie puzzled over the commander's method of counting for a few seconds before noticing six more trussed-up thieves behind him.

"Did you find their treasures?"

"Yes, in fact." he produced items of magnanimous beauty, jewelry that would place zeroth in a beauty contest, trinkets that defied the definition of "trinket", shiny objects from all walks of life.

Margaret walked up, plucked a single cup from the pile, and sat back. "Thank you, commander. You have done a great service."

It glimmered, a beautiful piece of silverwork with a single red weeping tear on it.

It was Saug's blood.

The cup was the Hosting Cup.

There was a great clamor and a yell. "The cup!" somebody screamed. There came great ripping noises from everywhere, and the tight beating of wings.

Wolfie in a panic straightened up, and noticed to his dismay that the throne was so ridiculously tall that he couldn't see over it. Then claws were digging into his back, somebody cried in dismay, and the world went black.

[Super-Llamaland]

Group A
Jeckland 4, Nova Anglicana 2
Zwangzug 8, Jecatria 9

1 Jeckland            8  7 0  1  44  25  +19  21
 2 Nova Anglicana      7  4 0  3  33  33  +0  12
 3 Jecatria            7  3 0  4   24  28  -4  9
 4 Diegstra            7  3 0  4  34  39  -5  9
 5 Zwangzug            7  1 0  6   33  43 -10  3
Group B
Kinzar 2, Vaugania 7
Saugeais 4, The Kytler Peninsulae 1
   Team                       P  W D  L For  Ag +/- Pts
 1 Saugeais                   7  5 0  2  39  30  +9  15
 2 The Kytler Peninsulae      7  5 0  2  30   26 +4  15
 3 Vaugania                   7  4 0  3  31  16  +15  12
 4 Kinzar                     8  4 0  4  28  36  -8  12
 5 New South Aqmuland         7  0 0  7  27  49 -22  0
Group C
Estope 4, The Fair Republic 5
Mosktopia 7, Levivania 5
   Team                                        P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Estope                                      8  6 0  2  59  43   +16  18
 2 Levivania                                   7  3 0  4  29  35   -6   9
 3 The Emerald and Formerly Crystal Isles      7  3 0  4  34  40  -6   9
 4 Mosktopia                                   7  3 0  4  37  35   +2   9
 5 The Fair Republic                           7  3 0  4  24  30   -6   9
Group D
Imota 1, New Wolfopolis 3
Equestrian States 3, Royal Kingdom of Quebec 7
   Team                         P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Allamunnic States            7  5 0  2  45  28  +17  15
 2 Equestrian States            7  5 0  2  45  35   +10  15
 3 Royal Kingdom of Quebec      7  5 0  2  43  35   +8  15
 4 New Wolfopolis               7  2 0  5  28  33   -5  6
 5 Imota                        8  1 0  7   16  46  -30  3
Group E 
Patistan 1, New Montreal States 3 (F/10)
Sicoutimont 7, Yttribia 1
   Team                     P  W D  L For  Ag +/- Pts
 1 Patistan                 8  6 0  2  41  24  +17  18
 2 Yttribia                 7  4 0  3  29   30  -1  12
 3 New Montreal States      7  3 0  4  23  20  +3  9
 4 Orennana                 7  3 0  4  28  42  -14  9
 5 Sicoutimont              7  2 0  5   17  24  -7  6
Group F
Mochria 1, The Royal Barangay 10
Karditan 3, Unolia 2
   Team                    P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Karditan                7  4 0  3  19  20   -1  12
 2 Unolia                  7  4 0  3   20  23   -3  12
 3 Mochria                 8  4 0  4  25  36   -11  12
 4 Zenic                   7  3 0  4  31   26  +5  9
 5 The Royal Barangay      7  3 0  4   29  24  +5  9

[New Wolfopolis]

Group G
Thatius 5, Cassadaigua 9
Hicana 3, Mizuyuki 1

   Team             P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Thatius          8  6 0  2  34  28   +6  18
 2 Brenecia         7  4 0  3  38  28  +10  12
 3 Cassadaigua      7  4 0  3  33  32   +1  12
 4 Mizuyuki         7  3 0  4  29  25   +4   9
 5 Hicana           7  1 0  6  20  41  -21   3

Group H
Noburu Taiyou 5, Milchama 4
Feministvs Sanctvsterra 0, Vettrera 4

   Team                         P  W D  L For  Ag +/- Pts
 1 Cosumar                      7  4 0  3  33  28  +5  12
 2 Noburu Taiyou                8  4 0  4  39  35  +4  12
 3 Vettrera                     7  4 0  3  28  33  -5  12
 4 Feministvs Sanctvsterra      7  3 0  4  29  31  -2   9
 5 Milchama                     7  3 0  4  33  35  -2   9

Group I
Crystal Empire 2, Ko-oren 3
Darmen 2, Western Cuba 8

   Team                P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Darmen              7  5 0  2  37  32   +5  15
 2 Ko-oren             7  4 0  3  34  22  +12  12
 3 Crystal Empire      8  3 0  5  30  32   -2   9
 4 Western Cuba        7  3 0  4  21  16   +5   9
 5 Falupia             7  3 0  4  28  48  -20   9

Group J
Nassau-Hessen 6, Maklohi Vai 5
Alitaba 4, Cuthbert Islands 5

   Team                  P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Nassau-Hessen         8  5 0  3  33  28   +5  15
 2 Alitaba               7  5 0  2  34  23  +11  15
 3 Cuthbert Islands      7  4 0  3  23  10  +13  12
 4 Organized States      7  3 0  4  21  27   -6   9
 5 Maklohi Vai           7  1 0  6  13  36  -23   3

Group K
Britonisea 2, Gregoryisgodistan 7
San Jose Guayabal 4, New North Aqmuland 2

   Team                    P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 San Jose Guayabal       7  5 0  2  28  24   +4  15
 2 Gregoryisgodistan       7  4 0  3  43  28  +15  12
 3 Mount Tamobet           7  4 0  3  30  43  -13  12
 4 Britonisea              8  4 0  4  40  32   +8  12
 5 New North Aqmuland      7  1 0  6  19  33  -14   3

Group L
Lymantatia 2, Super-Llamaland 5
The Serbian Empire 2, United Eastedge 10

   Team                    P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Super-Llamaland         7  5 0  2  40  25  +15  15
 2 United Eastedge         7  4 0  3  38  29   +9  12
 3 The Serbian Empire      7  4 0  3  32  31   +1  12
 4 Darvale                 7  3 0  4  36  37   -1   9
 5 Lymantatia              8  2 0  6  29  53  -24   6

[Equestrian States]

We're All High Here: or, An International Baseball Fan's Personal Hell

SOMEWHERE, Super-Llamaland - What the f*** is going on at this World Baseball Classic?

[Gregoryisgodistan]

Britonisea 2, Gregoryisgodistan 7

Bat Slaves beat Britonisea, one win away from Round of 24

Gregoryisgodistan continued its hot streak at the World Baseball Classic, winning its third straight to get above .500 for the first time. The Bat Slaves are now 4-3 on the season. They defeated Britonisea yesterday 7-2 behind a complete game by Spelling Enforcement Officer 01AHH183. The pitcher gave up 7 hits and walked one while allowing two runs. Both runs came on a home run in the top of the ninth with two outs, by which point the game was essentially over. Spelling Enforcement Officer 01AHH183 struck out the next batter to end the game.

On the offensive front, Enemy Crusher Bobby Furgles had a three-run home run in the first inning to get the scoring started for the Bat Slaves. Lumberjack JSUUSI99387 added a sacrifice fly in the fifth, and Cow Herder BYD1727 had a bases-clearing triple in the bottom of the eighth, bringing home three and essentially sealing the deal for the team.

If Gregoryisgodistan defeats San Jose Guayabal tonight, they will advance to the Round of 24. The team would win the group on head to head run differential against San Jose Guayabal and Mount Tamobet, thanks in large part to a 10-run win against the naked bandits from the land of the volcano. With a loss, Gregoryisgodistan could still advance if Mount Tamobet loses to New North Aqmuland. In that case, Gregoryisgodistan would finish second in the group at 4-4, winning tiebreakers over Britonisea and Mount Tamobet on head-to-head. Obviously the Bat Slaves would prefer to control their own destiny.

Baseball team to stay in New Wolfopolis despite attacks

Despite attacks by Wolfopian terrorists on Gregoryisgodistani soil, the national baseball team will remain in New Wolfopolis to participate in the World Baseball Classic. According to Lord Almighty Gregory, "The best way to humiliate New Wolfopolis for their attacks is to win the World Baseball Classic on their soil in front of their fans. We will win the World Baseball Classic championship and hoist the trophy, then mock the Wolfopians for their insults to our glorious and holy nation. They must pay for their misdeeds, and what better way to make them pay than winning a tournament on their soil? Meanwhile, I hear the Wolfopian team is plodding along with a losing record, really struggling in their own tournament. It would be an embarrassment to them if we won and they were eliminated in the group stage. I encourage the Bat Slaves to make it so. Death to New Wolfopolis!"