World Bowl XXIII - Everything Thread

by **HopNation** » Fri May 02, 2014 8:27 am

HopNation Handball
Throwing a Prolate Spheroid from End Zone to End Zone
The Group
Karditan keeps foot on the gas and runs over Mckleigh, while Icatus is handed lose by somebody….not sure who Menukten?!? Perhaps. Then the closest of the three games saw Equestrian States giving HopNation it’s fourth defeat of this World Bowl. I may be bias but who would have thought the Malts would be 0-4 at this point, 2-2 maybe, but not 4-4. I’m going to chalk the first loss up to a bad scouting report and statistical entry error as the team was given the wrong team order and locations, but they really need to do better. As for the other teams, we see the top two stretching their lead on the rest of the group as they now both have 12 points while the next closest foe has only 6 points. The surprise seems to be Menukten who are sitting in third but we have yet to actually witness a game played by their team. Strange tactics and even stranger results from looking over their score lines. If it weren’t for a couple huge losses for McKleigh they would be tied with Icatus, well they are on points just not on the +/- scale as McKleigh actually has the worst +/- of the group. After this next game we should have a clear leader as the Ironworkers host The Fire Ponies, so we’ll see which team shows up to play and take the lead in our group.
The Game
Malt’s Schedule            | Result | Malts’ Record
MD1:  @ McKleigh	   | 16-17  | (0-1)
MD2:  @ Karditan	   | 16-24  | (0-2)
MD3:  vs Menukten          | 13-22  | (0-3)
MD4:  @ Equestrian States  | 16-10  | (0-4)
MD5:  @ Icatus	           | ~-~    | (-)
MD6:  vs McKleigh	   | ~-~    | (-)
MD7:  vs Karditan	   | ~-~    | (-)
MD8:  @ Menukten           | ~-~    | (-)
MD9:  vs Equestrian States | ~-~    | (-)
MD10: vs Icatus	           | ~-~    | (-)
Malts are home/away
Malts score listed first in all games
Malts record is post that game
Win|Loss 
HopNation (Malts) @ Equestrian States (The Fire Ponies) at the Royal Coliseum (cap. 65,775) in Canterlot, Equestrian States

The Malts sure would have like to win this game and get back on track but The Fire Ponies were just to much for them. The clash of defenses proved to be a rather dull game considering the teams held each other to just 125 (HPN) and 145 (ES) offensive yards. The punters on the other hand got there reps in and will probably need some ice after all the action they saw. The Fire Ponies scored the first points with a 37 yard field goal put straight through the uprights by Blackstone. The Malts matched this field goal two drives later to lock the score at 3s and is where the first half would end. The third quarter started with Equestrian States receiving the HopNation kick-off. Jet Set galloped for an impressive 73 yard return, that started on the 2 yard line, before getting the hooves taken out from under him by Siverster Larghand, one of HopNations fastest corner backs but due to his poor coverage ability he is stuck on special teams. With the short field Score made quick work of putting some more points on the board. On the first play after the long return Score threw left to TE Graphite for a gain of 13, then handed off to Lightning Bolt who trampled Huffer Nitschky and Mills Louis as he headed into the end zone for the score putting The Fire Ponies up 10-3 early in the second half. After a few more punts from both teams the Malts managed a decent drive, but AP Goreyou fumbled as he took the ball into the red zone. Zachary Kim laid the hit on AP to force the fumble and Thunderoar laid down on it for the recovery. The Fire Ponies would get within range for Blackstone and they were now up 13-3 and we were headed into the fourth and final quarter. Half way through the fourth quarter Atwaters Polamalalu came up with a huge interception as he put a saddle on WR Hoops. When Polamalalu caught the ball Hoops didn’t know what to do as the player was on his back so he just ran around in circles. Polamalalu grabbed his mane and road the Pegasus into the end zone for the Malts score bringing them with in three as the score was now 13-10.On next Malts possession Fran Bradanning got rushed from the pocket, as he scrambled to his left he saw Deck Weswes in open space and launched the ball down field, but Youngclaw swooped in and picked off the pass. The Malt Marauders would hold, but Firehoof came on to attempt a 71 yard field goal. The Earth Pony made the distance look easy as this put Equestrian States up 16-10. The Malts had one last drive ahead of them as the clock was winding down. Bradanning put on the best drive of the day for HopNation, but due to back clock management and poor timeout usage the team was forced to try the Hail Mary with just 3 ticks of the clock left. Bradannings pass had the distance and both Weswes and Fitzjerry were under the ball, everything looked good as the two jumped to catch it but at the last second Ambrosia jumped over the two and got a hoof on the ball to knock it away. The Earth Pony seemed to treat both Weswes and Fitzjerry like they final jump at a Puissance competition.

Can the Malts turn their bad luck around? We’ll find out as they take on Icatus next.

The Gauntlet
HopNation @ Icatus, unknown location

The Malts need to get back on track and will hopefully do so as they take on a team that is 1-3 so far and we know nothing about them. They can however put points on the board as they have amassed 96 points for so far. They have shown some weak points as well since they have allowed 93 points against for a total +/- of only +3. But this +/- is much better than the Malts dismal -24.

Lets get on the winning side this time shall we…until next time Brew On, Brew Well Hoptonians!

Edit: missed a color code deletion - fixed

by **Zenic** » Fri May 02, 2014 9:00 am

“Honestly, I don’t know what else we can do.”

Goodson and “Titan” stood in the middle of New Maiz Field, with a box of footballs for each of them. They had set up targets on both sides of the field where the end zones would normally be. They stood back to back as Goodson threw to one side and Titan got the other side. Neither man was particularly happy, especially considering their current standings in the World Bowl. 2 straight, highly contested losses that had dropped the team into a three way tie for last. At least in this loss, they had a rushing TD from Pherigo to go along with two field goals by De La Fontaine.

“What else can we do to win games, Roy? We’ve shown up, ready to play every game and we only have one win. It just doesn’t make sense,” Titan complained as he threw a football that barely reached the goal line. Obviously, being a former safety and current defensive coordinator, he didn’t really have much of an arm, unlike Goodson. Goodson played Quarterback and Wide Receiver in college and won several awards so most of his throws were on target or close. If only Goodson could play for the national team, thought several of his staff and a good deal of the fans.

“I guess we’ll just have to take our lumps this World Bowl and hope that a few of the remaining games go our way.”

by **German Zerabithea** » Fri May 02, 2014 9:57 am

Gabriel Shoemaker, a middle class girl, from a middle class family, from a middle class nation (well, maybe not middle class but you get the point). Her story begins 14 years ago at a party hosted by her family.

For generations, her family was made up of master shoe makers (hence the last name, go figure), this cycle however, was broken by her father, who wanted nothing to do with the family business. He joined up with first the revolutionaries, then the eventual noble who went on to unite Zerabithea once more and brought back the monarchy. After the war, her father went on to become a local figure in his home town, eventually serving as mayor. Things had been rough as of late, but with the news that his eldest son would be joining the international football team, well, it was worth a celebration to be sure.

And so little Gabriel walked past all the tall people. What they were talking about, she didn't know, nor did she care, there was only one person she wanted to find. Sure enough, at the end of the room were her two brothers Gonzo and Robert.

"Gonzo!" She yelled as she ran into him, giving him the biggest hug she could muster. It had been a few days since she had last seen him, something about a sport? She couldn't remember. "Hey there sis." Gonzo replied while pating her on her head. "Good to know I was missed, almost thought you'd forgotten about me."

"Me? forget about you guys? y'all have to be crazy to think that!" She replied as the two brothers laughed. "Did mom and dad tell you about the news?"

"Huh?" Gabriel replied with a puzzled look on her face.

Robert interrupted right as Gonzo was about to reply. "Gonzo got picked by the Rams! He's going to be the QB to the international team!"

Gonzo wrapped his arm around Robert and gave him a noggie "Just couldn't wait for me to finish huh? But yeah, I'm heading out in a month to join the team for this year's World Bowl."

"Wha-what?" Gabriel replied, for a second, it was the only thing she could say. Losing Robert? She wouldn't stand for it. "N-No! You can't! Why do you have to leave?!"

She struggled to hold back tears and Gonzo got down on one leg and gave her a hug. "I have to, things have been a bit tough for the family as of late, but coach says I have the talent to take the team places, I'm going to bring fame to the family. And after each bowl, I have to come home, so I promise I'll be back."

*Sniff* "You promise?"

"I promise"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(OOC: Just imagine this song playing as the ad goes https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kr6aQDxj7D8 )

*Music begins playing as a recording of the end of WB 16 plays.*

And that's it, the game is over! The Regulars have won their first World Bowl ever!

Well Job, you got two Cinderella teams, but only one glass slipper, that's just how it goes sometimes.

*Scenes of the two teams are shown*

Tonight, a rematch 7 years in the making.

The Rams and Regulars meet again for the first time since the World Bowl 16 championship game!

Tonight, only on ZSN! Sports, by Zerabitheans, for Zerabitheans.

by **Anditia** » Fri May 02, 2014 10:00 am

Wolves lose a close one to Sanctii
Hannah D'Aub -- SAINTLAND

The Wolves were fully aware that their chances against the Sanctii (ranked 3rd in the world compared to Anditia’s 44th rank) were limited. The speed and power of their running back tandem is easily matched by the Fearsome Foursome linebacking crew however the Favonius twins and the Lusius brothers will be difficult to defend against when it comes to the secondary.

“We’ve got to shake-em down and rile ‘em up if we want to win” celebrity commentator Filburn Burgess said during his morning show Mornings with Filburn and Mary on game day. “Maybe we could see if there is some way of getting under their skin - cause them to feel a bit off. Bust up their cockles if you know what I mean.”

That, cockle-busting is exactly how Anditia planned on trying to win both on the field and off of the field. It all started with Wolves' mascot "Wilmar" crazy sideline antics before the game when he was running back and forth across the field taunting the Sanctii with rather offensive signs made by some of the more offensive Anditon fans - most of which desecrated the holy name of the King Petrus XX (who also happens to be the starting QB) comparing him to a variety of inanimate sexual devices and with descriptions of what could be done with said devices. The Sanctii security were quick to remove the signs from Wilmar's hands causing a raucous boo to erupt from the Anditon fans.

"Its a disgrace" one prudish fan proclaimed "Its rude enough that people would come up with such ideas, but to publicly declare them in an open venue is just horrible. And then to have Wilmar take the signs and validate them is just... a disgrace. I feel saddened to be an Anditon"

This, however was just the beginning of the taunting of the Sanctii from the small (but very vocal) group of Anditon that made the sojourn to Saintland for the matchup. Shortly following the beginning of the game, rhythmic chants began to emanate from the visiting crowd (seated directly behind the Anditon bench). These chants started to be simple and benign at first -- a repetition of the Petrus' name as he took the field. Unfazed by the chanting, Petrus was able to create a drive that lasted the majority of the first quarter and was completed in a 7 yard rush by power RB Tuccius for a touchdown. Borst and the rest of the Wolves were quick to respond with a long bomb (54 yards) to the speedy Sherwood Pai to even up the score at 7 as the first quarter came to a close.

As Petrus took the field again, the chants once again started up - this time becoming louder and louder as third down approached. Petrus seemed to notice his name being chanted (often followed by "Sucks" or some sort of derogatory term) amongst the silence of the rest of the stadium for the third and 2 play. The Sanctii attempted a powerful run up the middle (similar to their scoring play from the first quarter) but this time Tuccius was stuffed at the line of scrimmage by Johnny D'Urbo. With this stop, the Anditon fans erupted into such noise that an innocent bystander could have thought that the Wolves were the home team. Unfortunately, the Wolves were not truly able to capitalize on this stop, only managing a 32 yard field goal on the leg of backup kicker Stephen Rector. The tides quickly turned on the visiting Wolves as the Sanctii pulled a "hook and ladder" on the kick-off return. This tricky technique allowed them to score a TD and essentially take the wind out of the sails of the visiting crowd. Not to be out done, the Wolves were able to drive (following traded 3 and outs) the length of the field in during the 2 minute warning, capping off the drive with a touchdown on a swing play to Liam Uberrara. The Rhino blasted his way through three defenders during his 17 yard lumber into the endzone to tie the game at the half at 17 apiece.

The tables were turned at halftime, with Wilmar attempting to rile up the Sanctii crowd again. This time, he was forcefully removed from the stadium (and most likely fined) for intimating that former king (the recently assassinated) King Paulus XV had copulated with a horse to produce their current King Petrus XX. In a statement following the game, the handler of Wilmar (who is truly just a guy in a wolf suit) commented that the actions of Wilmar do not reflect the thoughts of the Anditon government, people or the Wolves as a whole concluding that the entire team is "deeply saddened by the actions of the mascot" and that he will be fired (if not from a cannon) once (or if) he is returned to Anditia. Rather than upset the crowd, this seemed to liven the Sanctii encouraging them to stop the Wolves in the red-zone only allowing a 27 yard Rector field goal. Using their newfound enthusiasm (with a hint of revenge) the Sanctii strung together a grueling drive of more than 70 yards for a touchdown bringing the score at the end of the third quarter to Saintland 24, Anditia 17.

Only down a touchdown and humbled by a tongue lashing by Coach Nestor Gregori on proper conduct in international situations, the Wolves looked as thought hey had their tails between their legs going into the fourth quarter. The offensive power of the Sanctii was great, but they were able to keep it stifled for now, trading short drives and punts until midway through the fourth when they were able to finally break into the Sanctii side of the field. This drive was quickly stopped in its tracks resulting in a 41 yard field goal by Rector. Within four points with only 5 minutes left in the game, the Anditon Wolves attempted an onside kick, however, since the injury to their normal kicker Alphonse Melgar, they were working with two inexperienced onside specialists. Rector placed too much power behind the kick, forcing the ball out of bounds, giving the Sanctii the ball at their own 40 yard line. This was then just a matter of driving thirty yards taking as much time off the clock as they could to bring the game out of reach -- they did just that on a 38 yard field goal by Philippus Francus to ice the game. Despite an attempt at a drive, the Sanctii defense was too much for Borst - Final Score: Saintland 27 - Anditia 20

Team        | Q1 | Q2 | Q3 | Q4 | Final
Saintland   |  7 | 10 |  7 |  3 | 27
Anditia     |  7 | 10 |  3 |  3 | 20

Anditon Scorers:
Q1: TD Pai (54 yds) from Borst
Q2: FG Rector (32 Yds)
    TD Uberrara (17 Yds)
Q3: FG Rector (27 Yds)
Q4: FG Rector (41 Yds)

The Wolves have lost their second game in a row, but have played well in all games to this point. We will see what this game will do to Sanctii/Anditon relations on the international scale, but we hope to see all actions by Wilmar to be ignored and thought of as more of the action of a singular person in a wolf costume, NOT the actions of the Anditon government or their people.

Up next the Wolves face an unranked New South Aqmuland. The NSA team has been surging recently at a record of 3-1. Not much is known about their style of play or their team as a whole but facing the NSA team on their home turf could be a challenge for the Anditon Wolves. We still expect the Wolves to win: Anditia 31, NSA 17

by **Timbermunich** » Fri May 02, 2014 10:35 am

Part 1: The Beginning

Legend of The Great Battle Axe
Part 1: The Beginning

Year 46 TBM: The Heir
Great Battle and Great One-Arm Willy had traveled down to the Vegetal Region and into Vegetalista shortly after their Elders meeting concluded and the other Elders went home to spread word of what was going to happen. When the two arrived in Vegatalista they were greeted with a warm welcome and Nat showed them to the hut which was made available to them and the other Grove Controllers that came with. As Great Battle and Great One-Arm Willy set to clearing the region the Grove Controllers accompanying them suddenly stopped working and watched as the two Greats seemed to effortlessly fell tree after tree. The two had soon cleared a swath in the area surrounding Vegatalista equal to 21.4 square kilometers (13.3 square miles), an area that would normally take 12 Grove Controllers two weeks to clear. The two finished the row they were on and checked on the others to only find them watching. The lead Grove Controller Buckskin Barry, who was second in command before Willy became Great One-Arm Willy, spoke with the two Greats and they came to the agreement that the Grove Controllers would follow after Great Battle and Great One-Arm Willy, as they would be Buckers on this trip. It took just two weeks for Great Battle and Great One-Arm Willy to clear-cut the entire region, something that was expected to take a few years to complete. The Grove Controllers now acting as Buckers were doing all they could to try and keep up, but with the amount of felled trees they were way behind when the two Greats finished. Nat now sent all of the Grove Controllers in his region out to help and prepare the Cold Deck, where was later moved to the northern boarder of the Vegetal Region so it could easily be distributed when needed by the other regions. Once an area was clear of all debris the Vegetalista Villagers started to work the ground in preparation for planting. As an offering of thanks Nat offered Great Battle his eldest daughter, a young woman said to be the fairest of all women through out Timbermunich. Nat’s daughter was known as Artemis and Great Battle knew the woman well after their time spent in Vegetalista as she helped the Grove Controllers as they returned to the village by offering food and water to them. Great Battle saw this as a great offering and accepted only with the agreement of Artemis, which she agreed to openly. Great Battle, Artemis, and Great One-Arm Willy returned to their own village where Great Battle and Artemis were married. The two now took on the role of watching over the Great Timbermunich Forest and along with Great One-Arm Willy oversaw all of Timbermunich. After a couple of years Artemis became pregnant, which was for the most part a normal pregnancy. Near the end of the pregnancy Artemis noticed that when ever Great Battle was near her with his axe the head of the axe would shimmer, unsure of what this meant she kept it from Great Battle and he was unaware of this effect. Artemis gave birth at full term to a baby boy and he would be called Battle like his Father. To celebrate his birth Great Battle and Great One-Arm Willy went back to the lightning log and brought it back to the village. The log was laid at the main entrance to the village and one of the two sections was placed on it’s end so it stood like a pillar, from this log Great Battle carved a bear like creature at the base and left the rest, the bear appeared to hold up the remaining portion of log. The remaining section of tree was kept near this pillar and they planned to use it to create other axes out of it, but these axes would only be fore Great Battle and Great One-Arm Willy’s children.

It was nearly 5 years before this log would be used to create an axe. During that time Great Battle and Artemis had two more children and Great One-Arm Willy met Juniper while helping distribute lumber from the Cold Deck to Pinophytania. The two wed shortly after meeting and gave birth to their first son Latymer on Battle’s fifth birthday. Because of the birth of Latymer and Great Battle’s first born son’s 5th birthday Great Battle decided to craft an axe haft from the Lightning Log and he presented it to the boy during the birth celebration. Battle took the haft from his father and swung it around a few times then asked his father when he would get a bit to put on it. Great Battle told the boy that he and Great One-Arm Willy would find a bit suitable for the boy, and hopefully enough for all of their heirs to come. This marked the start of Great Battle and Great One-Arm Willy’s quest to find the perfect stone.

To be continued…..

by **Ko-oren** » Fri May 02, 2014 11:35 am

A message popped up on a few of the screens in the control room of the Examiner project.

Th^ satelliTe w!ll come d%%^#oWn. wHer3 that W))&^$ill bE, 1s UP to you.

It was not like the messages on the log of the Inevitable Syndicate. After the realisation that the software of the Examiner project resembled that of the Keyhole project, a few very agitated members in the Ko-orenite control room sought contact with a very heated Syndicate room. In the few minutes that some answers from the Ko-orenite side were answered, a few vital questions were asked and answered, and the Examiner project members were sent a copy of the Syndicate's log, but this seemed different.

"Are we losing height already?" - "Where is it heading?" In the few minutes that followed the message, a lot of things happened in a short period of time. The computers were made to predict the place of impact of the Examiner I, meanwhile others were trying to affect the course of the satellite, others again were on the phone with politicians to prepare a possible catastrophe speech...

"It's heading for Ko-oren". A clear voice said something everybody expected already. Meanwhile, some had established a connection with the satellite and tried to input something. It didn't respond, but they had no reason to believe it didn't receive the data either. Bit by bit, the projected course of Examiner I curved westward.

Ko-oren           11 08 08 09 - 36
San Jose Guayabal 07 07 07 02 - 23

Q1 10:49 M. Castellanos 8yd run     / D. Ferrufino K   0-7
Q1 07:48 M. Samenotsard 2yd run     / S. Bakoan    2PC 8-7
Q1 00:17 S. Hergurin    38yd FG                        11-7

Q2 14:10 B. Wendlust    80yd run    / D. Ploraon   2PC 19-7
Q2 05:22 R. Hirezi      23yd pass   / D. Ferrufino K   19-14

Q3 04:14 M. España      29yd pass   / D. Ferrufino K   19-21
Q3 02:59 D. Ploraon     34yd run    / A. Denis     2PC 27-21

Q4 11:40 Y. Laínez      SAFETY                         27-23
Q4 10:30 S. Hergurin    38yd FG                        30-23
Q4 06:34 S. Hergurin    22yd FG                        33-23
Q4 00:28 S. Hergurin    35yd FG                        36-23

Ploraon looked bad again after allowing another safety - the quarterback has had better days with the Dragonflies. Hergurin was tested in the fourth quarter. We have a kicker, but not always use him and instead we go for the two-point conversion - which the team has perfected and is often flawlessly executed. Still, the kicker was used three times in the final quarter to definitely keep San Jose Guayabal down: the first put a 7-point gap between us and them, the second and the third were just stat padding.

The bad spell of Denes Ploraon goes as far as needing Samenotsard to bring in the points for the Greenblues, not exactly the one you would expect to get points. On the other side, the defense looked shoddy too: they knew San Jose Guayabal would come in with three wide receivers, but they failed to deal with them properly and this put the opponents ahead of the Ko-orenites twice in the game.

The next game until Gregoryisgodistan will mark the end of the first half of the World Bowl group stage. They are looking as strong as us, at the least, and maybe only Group H's Karditan v. Equestrian States can top our game, if only because it will be interesting to see ponies take on ponies (and people).

by **Saintland** » Fri May 02, 2014 11:44 am

Sister Polus's Thoughts

Hello once again. This is Sister Maria Polus, High Inquisitor and Headmistress at Progress High School in St. Ioannes and I am joining you today to discuss several matters that have come up recently. I have been rather busy lately grading essays on the vital importance of the Holy Filioque to the Nicene Creed. Given the vital importance of this matter, the minimum length for the essays was 30 pages. Consequently, reading and grading these essays has taken up most of my free time for the past week. Unfortunately, my theology students are extraordinarily stubborn. Regrettably, most of the class will be receiving failing grades on these papers. There's just nothing I can do when they refuse to pay attention in class.

But I digress. By now you have undoubtedly heard the report from Meghan Comrie of the Concord Heights Times. Meghan visited the Wicked Republics to report on Cassadaigua's World Bowl game against that wicked nation, which was played in the same stadium where the Late, Great King Paulus XV was murdered by a regicidal coward, who inexplicably got away with it. As it turns out, they didn't even bother to position any security near the private suite where our King was murdered just 3 short months ago! They have also done absolutely nothing to keep guns out of stadiums and they have done absolutely nothing to keep anybody safe in their stadiums. It is most fortunate that nobody was killed during the recent World Cup and it is most fortunate that nobody was killed at that World Bowl game. I call upon the nations of the multiverse to condemn the Sinful Republics for their complete indifference to security and their reckless policies that endanger the lives of anybody who enters that God-forsaken nation.

Yet, they have the audacity to sing "God Bless the FFR" on international television. Why should God bless them? As far as I can tell, they've forgotten that he exists. Otherwise, they wouldn't be a total cesspool of a nation where rape is practically legal, women are encouraged to sell their bodies for pieces of silver and any criminal can get their hands on a gun and carry it anywhere with impunity? Why should God bless a nation where abortion is mostly legal? Why should God bless a nation that permits its entertainment industry to glorify violence and perversion? Why should God bless a modern day Gomorrham? I don't care whether I cause an international incident. Let's face facts. The so-called "Free" Republics is a nation where the vast majority of the people are slaves to sin and that they claim to be free is an abomination to God.

In other news, Sporting World, their publication that is notorious for its unreliable reporting, has published an article alleging that King Petrus XX will be holding an event in honor of his father. I have yet to hear anything of the sort and, personally, I doubt it. The World Cup of Hockey from several months ago was already held in honor of our Fallen King and the last thing we need right now is a bunch of foreigners running around our Kingdom disrespecting our laws.

I want to finish by discussing the World Bowl. Apparently, our National Team is just 3-1 at the moment. Several days against, against Macquarrie, King Petrus XX no-showed the match. This is unacceptable. We deserve better than this from our King. He hasn't even apologized to our Kingdom for his no-show. I will refrain from additional comment at this time, but if our King doesn't shape up, I will not hesitate to criticize him. I am Sister Maria Polus and I thank you for watching.

by **The Fanboyists** » Fri May 02, 2014 12:02 pm

Allamunnic States Daily
World Bowl XXIII Coverage

A Big Rematch
Regulars to face Rams in rematch of WBXVI Final

After a mix of scheduling snafus and lack of warmups resulted in the Regulars getting embarrassed on the road against Levivania, the Allamunnic squad will look to get back on track against the Rams of German Zerabithea. Despite the 52-25 shellacking on the road, the Regulars are still neck-and-neck with the Rams (who also lost on Matchday 4) for the group lead going into the end of the first half of qualifying.

The Regulars fell behind early against Levivania, playing sluggish and simply looking overwhelmed in the first half. Of particular note was the way the Levivanian quarterback victimized Belle Marquette, targeting the receivers covered by the diminutive cornerback for three of their five touchdowns. Two other touchdowns came on a kick and a punt return, and three field goals from Levivania sealed the lead against a brief, half-hearted comeback attempt by the Regulars. Leif Erikson and Daanyl Wyndhorst provided the Regulars' scores, with Wyndhorst breaking a 51-yard run to help him finish with 12 rushes for 75 yards and a touchdown. Graagur Baaltrsunn also added 18 carries for 94 yards. Meanwhile Leif Erikson went 17/27 for 231 yards and two touchdowns with one interception.

What this results in is two 3-1 former champions going into a rematch of their first finals match, seven (going-on eight) years later. Both teams have certainly been successful: the Rams won their first championship a few years later, and the Regulars, as most reading this would already know, went on to four consecutive finals berths, winning three of them to tie Dancougar for the most World Bowl Championships (and the most among an active participant).

The teams have both changed, the Regulars probably more than the Rams. The Regulars have a new head coach, have gone through two offensive coordinators and one other defensive coordinator in that span, and most of the defensive players that made up that spine-breaking defensive unit have retired or moved on to other pursuits. Leif Erikson, an erratic rookie in World Bowl XVI, though still inconsistent at times, has taken ownership of the signal-caller's role in the offense. The stable of tailbacks has shifted, with Daanyl Wyndhorst and Ole Nurdsunn the only ball-carriers remaining from World Bowl XVI, with Nurdsunn pushed into more and more of an auxiliary role. Of the ten pass-catchers the Regulars had on the roster in World Bowl XVI, only two of them (TE Garrett Kelley and WR Hael Fokkenmaar) are still with the team, now the elder statesmen of their units.

But what's remained the same? Daanyl Wyndhorst is still a dangerous tailback, and if he's sharing the load more now than he did when he shredded the Rams' defense to the tune of 21 rushes for 182 yards and three touchdowns, he's still just as explosive. The faces on the defense may have changed, but the unit's hard-nosed, physical approach to playing hasn't, and the team's commitment to a power-oriented, smashmouth offense remains the same.

So the same teams won't quite face off in Tzar Zachary I National Stadium, but that won't change the stakes of the match-up (a little lower than last time, but still of consequence), and it certainly won't change the expectation of a good match between two former champions.

by **Estope** » Fri May 02, 2014 1:05 pm

MATCHDAY 5

Osarius 26, Cassadaigua 51
Hutt River 13, The Fair Republic 62
Hamamatsu 17, Free Republics 35

Group A Standings

   Team                   P  W D  L  For   Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Cassadaigua            5  4 0  1  200  117  +83  12
 2 Osarius                5  3 0  2  149  148   +1   9
 3 Free Republics         5  2 0  3  159  181  -22   6
 4 Hamamatsu              5  2 0  3  111  142  -31   6
 5 The Fair Republic      5  2 0  3  145  112  +33   6
 6 Hutt River             5  2 0  3  116  180  -64   6

Vettrera 16, The Royal Kingdom of Quebec 20
Estenia 17, New North Aqmuland 16
Kykid8 19, Jeckland 20

Group B Standings

   Team                             P  W D  L  For   Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Estenia                          5  5 0  0  120   82  +38  15
 2 New North Aqmuland               5  3 0  2   98   78  +20   9
 3 Kykid8                           5  2 0  3  100   97   +3   6
 4 The Royal Kingdom of Quebec      5  2 0  3  120  104  +16   6
 5 Vettrera                         5  2 0  3   89  121  -32   6
 6 Jeckland                         5  1 0  4   98  143  -45   3

Taeshan 30, Unolia 16
The Royal Barangay 23, Ati Kaluraya 29
Zenic 17, The Glorious Commune 40

Group C Standings

   Team                      P  W D  L  For   Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Taeshan                   5  5 0  0  177   78  +99  15
 2 Ati Kaluraya              5  4 0  1  133   75  +58  12
 3 Unolia                    5  2 0  3  123  122   +1   6
 4 The Glorious Commune      5  2 0  3  104  173  -69   6
 5 The Royal Barangay        5  1 0  4   91  124  -33   3
 6 Zenic                     5  1 0  4   82  138  -56   3

Allamunnic States 19, German Zerabithea 25
Mochria 34, Super-Llamaland 29
The Tidal Wake 26, Levivania 17

Group D Standings

   Team                   P  W D  L  For   Ag  +/- Pts
 1 German Zerabithea      5  4 0  1  117   82  +35  12
 2 Allamunnic States      5  3 0  2  102  120  -18   9
 3 The Tidal Wake         5  3 0  2   86   76  +10   9
 4 Super-Llamaland        5  2 0  3  112  114   -2   6
 5 Levivania              5  2 0  3  141  153  -12   6
 6 Mochria                5  1 0  4   91  104  -13   3

Estope 22, Saintland 28
New South Aqmuland 10, Anditia 41
Macquarrie 27, Quackmybush 7

Group E Standings

   Team                    P  W D  L  For   Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Saintland               5  4 0  1  140  121  +19  12
 2 Anditia                 5  3 0  2  136   89  +47   9
 3 Macquarrie              5  3 0  2  113   79  +34   9
 4 New South Aqmuland      5  3 0  2  104  127  -23   9
 5 Estope                  5  2 0  3  139  134   +5   6
 6 Quackmybush             5  0 0  5   87  169  -82   0

Cosumar 22, Darmen 37
Hicana 19, New Wolfopolis 22 (F/OT)
Darvale 9, Democratic States of Fenbar 17

Group F Standings

   Team                             P  W D  L  For   Ag   +/- Pts
 1 Darmen                           5  5 0  0  200   84  +116  15
 2 Darvale                          5  3 0  2  120  108   +12   9
 3 New Wolfopolis                   5  3 0  2   97  113   -16   9
 4 Cosumar                          5  2 0  3  104  124   -20   6
 5 Democratic States of Fenbar      5  2 0  3  104  125   -21   6
 6 Hicana                           5  0 0  5   75  146   -71   0

Gregoryisgodistan 30, Ko-oren 31
Timbermunich 10, San Jose Guayabal 22
Alparia 19, Nassau-Hessen 45

Group G Standings

   Team                   P  W D  L  For   Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Ko-oren                5  5 0  0  178   95  +83  15
 2 Gregoryisgodistan      5  3 0  2  156  112  +44   9
 3 San Jose Guayabal      5  3 0  2  108  105   +3   9
 4 Nassau-Hessen          5  2 0  3  132  139   -7   6
 5 Timbermunich           5  2 0  3   91  119  -28   6
 6 Alparia                5  0 0  5   81  176  -95   0

Karditan 17, Equestrian States 20
Icatus 26, HopNation 38
Menukten 10, McKleigh 23

Group H Standings

   Team                   P  W D  L  For   Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Equestrian States      5  5 0  0  146   99  +47  15
 2 Karditan               5  4 0  1  159   79  +80  12
 3 McKleigh               5  2 0  3   79  155  -76   6
 4 Menukten               5  2 0  3   98  128  -30   6
 5 HopNation              5  1 0  4   93  105  -12   3
 6 Icatus                 5  1 0  4  122  131   -9   3

by **The Fair Republic** » Fri May 02, 2014 7:38 pm

Buck Naters walks into the press room. The worst part about being national head coach is the "fishbowl view" as he calls it, constantly being seen and little privacy. He sits down takes a sip of water and the press bulbs flash and eager reporters looking for a sound bite,

"Coach, Jack Anderson, Vis Vires Times, Reactions about today's game any complaints?

"Complaints? We had a team record 629 total team offense. 9 Touchdowns, Crawford ran for 4 of those along with his 325 yard day, Williams threw for 2 along with 175 yards and the defense and special teams had 3! Darius caught a touchdown and ran for 129! We forced 6 turnovers and allowed only 179 yards! Complaints? I'd prefer not being asked weak ass questions by reporters next!

"Coach, Jon Jones, Estope Post. After a 0-3 start you guys were able to win two in a row beating defending champs Cassadaigua along the way. How are you feeling about the Toucans going forward?"

Not well. We lost 2 games which we should have won versus Free Republics and Hamamatsu. If luck had it we could have been in 1st place due to tiebreaker. Now because we played like crap to start off we have to play perfect football to get past the group stage."

"Coach, Sabrina Dillon, Cassadaigua Courier. Your offence is based on a power, smash mouth running attack and being able to able to take chunks of time off the clock. The teams who beat you were able to neutralize Jermichael and Crawford and force you to defeat them through the air. Do you think Williams will be able to carry the Toucans through the air if necessary ?
?

"I would be lying if I told you that I wasn't a bit nervous about that. Williams has been working his tail off and along with the receiving core they are both better players than they were last World Bowl. Last Question"

"Coach, Issac Davis, Free Republic Post. You are 78 and counting. How long will it be until you decide to hang up the head set?

"I haven't though about since I'm trying to win a World Bowl here! Goodnight"

Scoring Summary:

1st Quarter:
TFR: 103 yard kick return by Devin Jones, 7-0 TFR (14:51)
TFR: 35 yard fumble return by Matt Stevens, 14-0 TFR (12:49)
HR: 58 yard field goal, 14-3 TFR (7:17)
TFR: 15 yard run by Adrian Crawford, 21-3 TFR (0:31)

2nd Quarter:
HR: 55 yard field goal, 21-6 TFR (13:39)
TFR: 7 yard pass from Buck Williams to Darius T. Jermichael V, 28-6 TFR (11:01)
TFR: 12 yard run by Adrian Crawford, 35-6 TFR (7:20)
TFR: 22 yard interception return by Djoti Itojda, 42-6 TFR (6:52)
TFR: 18 yard pass from Buck Williams to Brian Udderson, 49-6 TFR (1:06)
TFR: 2 yard run by Adrian Crawford, 56-6 TFR (0:19)

3rd Quarter:
HR: 19 yard pass, 56-13 TFR (14:26)
TFR: 38 yard run by Adrian Crawford, Extra Point missed, 62-13 TFR (12:42)

by **Taeshan** » Fri May 02, 2014 9:14 pm

http://chirb.it/cLfLEg

by **Ko-oren** » Sat May 03, 2014 8:53 am

"The slower we can make it go, the further west we can get it." The better mathematicians in the room already had an impression of what was going to happen. "It currently is still heading for Ko-orenite mainland. If we can slow down its descent, the further west we might be able to get it. It doesn't matter if the satellite doesn't respond - as long as it receives our commands and believe it or not, but every command you gave it... even though it didn't respond, it surely adjusted something in there. I just don't understand why its direction is changing so slowly. It's like something is blocking the ailerons and maneuver boosters."

Y@#232ou don't kno42w whA74T you are dO634ing.

Another message. And apparently it was transmitted via the Examiner I. It was quickly followed by more text.

YES, sO you3w4 ha3@$ve moved i&^&t. Grea55T woRRK. NoWW G3t out of there.

Simultaneously, the satellite responded to all commands given by the people in the control room. The problem was that it responded negatively to all commands. From another corner in the room, a few other voices were heard.

"It's not curving further outward. It's hardly moving at all at the moment, so whatever setting it is stuck on now, it's working." "Ailerons are stuck in a good position. If it continues to fall slowly, it will land far west of us."

Boosters on.

That was the new message. No transmission problems. Just two words.

Gregoryisgodistan 18 06 00 06 - 30
Ko-oren           06 12 06 07 - 31

Q1 13:20 Zookeeper ZNZ949AHX     7yd run     /                6-0
Q1 10:00 Soldier 193DGA          64yd Return /               12-0
Q1 05:40 B. Wendlust             71yd Return /               12-6
Q1 04:33 Slavecatcher ZN39000ASD 12yd run    /               18-6

Q2 12:16 A. Denis                30yd pass   /               18-12
Q2 10:04 R. Adhaumauan           4yd pass    /               18-18
Q2 00:30 Chef L0091              28yd run    /               24-18

Q3 08:48 G. Sharnebal            69yd Return /               24-24

Q4 03:27 Zookeeper ZNZ949AHX     15yd run    /               30-24
Q4 00:40 D. Ploraon              14yd run    / S. Hergurin K 30-31

For two teams that have done nothing else than prevent other teams from getting too far, the Ko-oren - Gregoryisgodistan game ended in a high score. On the match day that the top two seeds of all groups played each other, only one other top game ended in a higher score. That doesn't say that it was a one-sided game: 30-31.

And that's not the only similarity (that is, defensive-mindedness and score). Both teams are notorious for going for two-point conversions (and all teams should go for those by default: expected payout). But guess what happens when defensive-minded teams go for two-point conversions against each other. Yes: they do not work. Hergurin demanded a chance in the final 30 seconds of the game, and somehow that actually payed out, and gave Ko-oren the win and the group lead for at least another two games.

Something that did catch the eye of many neutral fans: what could have been the first 0-0 in a while, ended in a 30-31. And before you say that '0-0 is a little bit over-exaggerated', remember that the Greenblues actually did it once: against the Allamunnic States, with a 0-3 overtime win. Anyhow, two defensive teams with both honestly poor offenses, that both saw their offense get most of the points raises some eyebrows. In fact, both defenses were responsible for just 18 points out of the total (2 Ko-oren returns, 1 Gregoryisgodistan return).

(OOC: I hope I respected your roster notes... or at least explain what's weird about this. Feel free to change whatever you want, and I'll just blame your propaganda machines =D)

by **Super-Llamaland** » Sat May 03, 2014 9:25 am

Is our team really this terrible?

Nope. We're just bipolar. Very, very, very bipolar. Inconsistency on steroids, that's us.

Sure, we've lost to the Tidal Wake and Mochria. But hey, we've beaten German Zerabithea. The world number three. But still, we had a chance to work ourselves into a tie at second yesterday with a win, and we failed completely and utterly. It looks like winning out might be our only option if German Zerabithea and the Allamunnic States continue their superb ways.

Let's run through how our first half went this way.

MD1: 29-20 W v. Levivania
Things began well as the Warriors took a 16-0 lead in the second quarter, went on the verge of blowing it, and then sealed the game in lead when Ryan Smith intercepted a pass and ran seventy-seven yards.
MD2: 19-17 L v. Allamunnic States
Nothing else could be expected against one of the world's best teams and a serious contender for the championship. But still, when a punt return gave us a 17-10 lead, fans were pretty darn impressed. We choked the game away, but it was a positive stepping stone as we geared for the playoffs.
MD3: 28-17 L v. The Tidal Wake
Things began to go bad just around here. We gave up a ridiculously high twenty-one points in the first half for a 21-7 deficit and never recovered. Darwin Mendelev was okay, but the defense was terrible.
MD4: 20-13 W v. German Zerabithea
However, it picked up a little as the Warriors started 2-2 in certainly a weird way. Darwin Mendelev threw a clutch TD pass to Bill DiVito with 2:45 left in the game, and the defense forced four interceptions from Rob Shoemaker.
MD5: 34-29 L v. Mochria
I. Hatings. This.

Seriously, how do you go from forcing four interceptions from Rob Shoemaker to giving up thirty-four points against the worst team in the group? I give up.

by **The Fanboyists** » Sat May 03, 2014 10:34 am

Allamunnic States Daily
World Bowl XXIII Coverage

Road Woes Continue
Rams triumph on late score, Regulars fall to 3-2

Group D has rapidly turned into the group of parity, with only one game separating four of the teams after the Regulars couldn't hold on against German Zerabithea last night. The Regulars only lead Tidal Wake by virtue of their head-to-head record (and should be behind if it were based on point differential), and Levivania and Super-Llamaland standing at 2-3, while Mochria won their first game against Super-Llamaland yesterday, and German Zerabithea separated from the pack to 4-1 by downing the Regulars.

The game was neck-and-neck for much of the day, with the teams playing physical but clean. The refs only tossed a couple of flags, mostly for false starts and the like, and the teams seemed amicable after the game ended, even if the Regulars seemed (understandably) disappointed.

The first quarter started with the Regulars getting the opening kickoff, but having to punt a few plays later. The Rams answered with their own punt, and each team had another punt before things started to heat up. The first score came when the Dwight Kenny busted out a 31-yard screen from Robert Shoemaker to open scoring midway through the first quarter. Figuring that they needed to go bold and aggressive to beat the Regulars, Shoemaker tossed the two-point conversion to Gerarrge Manotiee to put the Rams up, 8-0.

The Regulars' offense answered by pounding the ball on the ground, with Leif Erikson tossing two drive-saving third-down conversions. In answer to the Rams' explosive play, Daanyl Wyndhorst ripped off a 23-yard run into the endzone. Justin Connors booted the PAT, closing the gap to 8-7. The Rams' next drive didn't go anywhere, the Allamunnic defense swarming Shoemaker and sacking him once (by Danley Vicious) and forcing several incompletions and a punt. Jana Graelunn returned the punt to the German Zerabithean 43 yard line. The offense only moved the ball about fifteen yards before the drive stalled. Connors knocked in a 45-yard field goal to give the Regulars a 10-8 lead midway through the second quarter.

German Zerabithea drove down the field on the next drive, and although the Allamunnic defense was able to slow them down some (including Honorius Waalturs tallying a sack on the drive), ultimately, it wasn't enough to keep Shoemaker from lobbing an 8-yard touchdown to Manotiee. This time, they let Katie Wisslespoon kick the PAT, giving the Rams a 15-10 lead that they would take into the locker room at the half.

The Rams received the kickoff to start the second half, but good special teams play from the Allamunnae prevented Charles Valintely from getting very far, getting tackled by Loren Sult at the five-yard line. Playing close to the endzone, the Rams tried to run to gain some breathing room, putting the ball in the hands of Jones Jams. However, as Jams tried to find an opening, Steven Lindburgh found him, hitting him in the backfield and stripping the ball from his hands, flinging it out to the side. Cornelius Waugs scooped the ball up as it bounced into the endzone, and was turning his eyes back up-field when Maarkus Staalhelm slammed into him, tackling him in the endzone and chalking a safety for the Regulars. The gap closed a little, 15-12, with the Regulars getting the ball back.

Graelunn again put the offense in good position, returning the fair punt to the Rams' 35 yard-line, but once again, the offense could barely get anything going, stalling out at the 24 yard-line. Connors walked back out onto the field, the kick went up, and promptly bounced off one of the uprights on the 41-yard field goal attempt, keeping the Regulars from capitalizing on their safety. Working from the touchback, Shoemaker expertly orchestrated another drive down the field, but this time the defense swarmed them in the redzone. After several incomplete passes and another sack by Danley Vicious, Wisslespoon knocked in a 32-yard field goal to extend the Rams' lead, 18-12.

As time wound down in the third quarter, the Regulars took a drive starting from their 34 yard-line down the field. The drive was a long one, the Regulars doing most of their moving on the ground, again, with gaps filled by Leif Erikson mostly on short passes to his tight ends (specifically Garrett Kelley and Goedwyn Braanur). Finally, the drive culminated in Graagur Baaltrsunn punching in a 2-yard touchdown run. After Connors' PAT, the Regulars had retaken the lead, 19-18.

The teams traded punts as the Regulars offense sputtered against a solid German Zerabithean defense, and the Rams' powerful offense sputtered against a swarming Allamunnic defense. Shoemaker was sacked again, this time by Henrik Baaldr, while Leif Erikson ate turf under Tyrone Huge trying to convert a third down. Time ticked down, and with only two minutes left in the game, Shoemaker led a drive from his own 25 down the field, connecting on short passes and getting breathing room on the occasional rush, finally connecting on a slant with Waugs in the endzone. With Wisslespoon's PAT, the Rams retook the lead, 25-19.

All that was left after that was a desperate run to the endzone by Graelunn on the kickoff (she didn't make it past the Allamunnic 40), and then three hail-mary attempts by Leif Erikson. The first landed neatly in Hael Fokkenmaar's hands, but was jarred loose by a hard hit from Garrett Momson. The next pass was batted out of bounds by Chaplin Paul, intended for Braant Skyllur. And finally, on the last, as he tried to hit Jana Graelunn in stride, the pass was picked off by Paul, who was promptly tackled by Goedwyn Braanur. With the ball back in their hands, Shoemaker was able to take a knee, allowing the Rams to finish out the victory.

Erikson finished 10/18 for 138 yards and an interception and getting sacked twice, a sharp contrast to Robert Shoemaker, who went 31/44 for 342 yards and three touchdowns for the Rams while being sacked four times. On the ground, the Regulars fared better, with Daanyl Wyndhorst rushing 16 times for 78 yards and a touchdown, and Graagur Baaltrsunn rushing 18 times for 83 yards and a touchdown. Ole Nurdsunn added three rushes for 14 yards to contribute to the Regulars' total of 175 rushing yards of a team total 313 yards. For rushing, contrast the Rams' Jones Jams, who rushed 13 times for 43 yards.

"Some games just really test you like this," Leif Erikson told reporters after the game. "And unfortunately, you don't always pass every test. We didn't today, in spite of everything we left out there. Credit a great game by Robert Shoemaker for that, we just couldn't answer their offense, and they got what they needed every time they needed it. We couldn't do that nearly as well, and it showed."

The loss is the Regulars' second-straight on the road, and it puts them at 3-2 in second place in Group D as they head into the mid-round break. They will open the second half of qualifiers in Thomasburg against third-place Tidal Wake, who they were able to beat on the road earlier. But now, with every game being critical, they won't be able to take anything for granted.

"Suddenly, every game from here on out becomes a must-win," Honorius Waalturs said. "We can't slip up at all, or, the way this group is shaping up, we'll never recover and we'll miss the playoffs. And that is simply not an option."

by **Gregoryisgodistan** » Sat May 03, 2014 10:43 am

OOC: This RP is done with permission of Saintland. Nobody will actually get killed unless they're from Gregory Llama Land, which is my puppet, or I have permission from the nation in question. Feel free to TG me if you have any citizens who are very low in the line of succession to Saintland and who you want to get killed.

Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ appeared to be just an average Gregoryisgodistani. He had worked as a prune farmer his entire adults life. Now, he was a 39-year old man still waiting for Lord Almighty Gregory to assign him a spouse. However, there was something very special about Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ. He was the distant descendant of King Ioannes I of Saintland's younger brother Petrus. This meant he was in the line of succession to the Sanctii throne. Of course, there were a lot of people ahead of him since Petrus had moved to what would later become the Free Republics in the Middle Ages. Back in the 18th century, Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ's ancestors moved to Gregory Llama Land before eventually his parents moved to Gregoryisgodistan after recognizing Lord Almighty Gregory as their Lord and Savior.

Not only were there a lot of people ahead of him, but Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ was dead last in the line of succession. Everyone else in the whole royal line would have to die for him to be King. Lord Almighty Gregory eventually found out about this and hatched a plan. With the help of the Gregoryisgodistani Army, Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ would kill everyone else in the line of succession to the throne. Then, he would pretend to convert to the Church of Saintland so he could be King. He would then kill the Holy Patriarch and appoint a representative of the Church of Gregoryisgodistan as the replacement. Finally, he would convert Saintland to the Church of Gregoryisgodistan and execute the non-believers.

First, they had to do the easiest kills. There were approximately 500 living Gregllamese citizens ahead of Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ in the line of succession. Most of them were his cousins, who had disowned the family after they converted to the Church of Gregoryisgodistan. So Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ knew where most of them lived, and he gladly provided that information to the Gregoryisgodistani Army.

First up, there was the person just ahead of Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ in the line, his cousin Phillip Baines, who lived in Llama City. Baines was the oldest son of Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ's father's oldest brother, Jacob Baines. Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ's father's birth name was Mark Baines, but he changed it to Prune Farmer POZA9129 after arriving in Gregoryisgodistan. Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ had always been known by that name, as he was born in Gregoryisgodistan.

In any case, Jacob Baines was awoken in the middle of the night by the Holy Gregoryisgodistani Army breaking down his door. They marched right in and shot him to death. Although there was an absolute right to bear arms in Gregory Llama Land, Baines' cache of weapons was no match for the high-grade military equipment used by the Army. He did manage to get one shot off, wounding Soldier AZ12HHD slightly, but it wasn't a major wound at all. There was now one fewer person separating a Gregoryisgodistani from the throne of Saintland. And on that day when Prune Farmer JZ102ZPAZ did ascend to the throne, it would only be a matter of time before Saintland recognized Lord Almighty Gregory as the True Lord, not this "Iesus" fellow. However, there were still several thousand to go. It was going to take a long time.

by **Kykid8** » Sun May 04, 2014 9:44 am

The crowd for Kykid8 sighs and slowly walks away fro the stadium.

"This is another sad, sad day for UKK... Hopefully the team will start practicing some more and stop sulking around," says announcer Jerry Breef.

"I agree with ya Jerry, Maybe they will get back in gear," states Greg Verji.

As the crowd walks out of the stadium, their only hope is to chant UKK's Team's starter song, "And We wont give up! And we wont be let down, for we are the best all around!"

In the Locker Room

"All right guys! What is happening out there!? Are you tired? Are you sick? We got to get out there and get it together or we will lose ANOTHER game!?!?!" Yells head coach Fred Nikle.

"YES SIR! YES SIR! We wont go! We wont quite! We'll stand up and fight for it! YES SIR! YES SIR! We wont go! We wont quite! We'll stand up and fight for it!" The team sings loudly.

"Alright then! Now the next game I want you to go out there and kick the other teams ass!"

"YES SIR!"

"good, now to the hotel and get a good sleep, then wake up at 6 A.M. and hustle down to the practice field! ASAP! GO GO GO!"

by **Saintland** » Sun May 04, 2014 5:23 pm

Estope proved to be a tougher than expected opponent for the Saintland National Team. It was early in the 4th quarter and the hosts of World Bowl XXIII had just scored a touchdown to move within an extra point of tying the game at 21. Lucas Rompa's 14 yard touchdown run had capped off an impressive drive against a still-ailing Sanctii defense. Then, Estope decided to go for 2. Noll Walen stepped up to the line. Brent Rabb snapped the ball and Walen dropped back, looking for an open receiver. His pass to Kent Oberlin was a dangerous throw. Andreas Oclatinius was in perfect position to bat down the pass, but Oclatinius somehow missed it and it found its way into the hands of its intended receiver. Estope now led 22 to 21.

King Petrus XX had already thrown for a touchdown and scored 2 other touchdowns on the ground. Andreas Tuccius, the great Sanctii running back, had left the game due to a muscle cramp in his left leg, but at this moment King Petrus was afraid that his injury was much worse than that. Petrus Maximius and Matthaeus Loreius had both proven ineffective, on this day, leaving the King of Saintland to carry the offense on his back. So far, he had proven up to that task.

After Nicolaus Lusius took a knee, King Petrus XX took the field. By this point, he had decided to use Alessandro Ancharius as his lone back. The fullback may have been slightly more of an offensive weapon than the typical fullback, but the 270-pounder's main strength was his blocking. With all the pressure that Estope was getting on the quarterback, King Petrus felt that he needed a blocker. It wasn't like his running backs were effective playmakers anyway at the moment, so he wasn't losing anything and was gaining a blocker.

With the ball sitting on the 20 yard line, the Sanctii lined up in a double-tight formation. King Petrus XX called a pass play, as expected. This time, he called a max protect pass play, with both tight ends and the fullback staying in to block, with options if there was nobody to block. As it turned out, Estope brought the blitz on first down, leaving Ioannes Lusius and Lucius Herius to take on the Estope secondary. Each of them was facing a corner playing man coverage. Each corner had a safety for support.

The ball was snapped by Abraham Nemetorius. The Sanctii quarterback dropped back a full 7 steps. He had literally all day to throw. The only problem was that there was literally nobody open. The blitz proved unable to breach the offensive line. Alessandro Ancharius read this and ran his option route toward the left side of the backfield. King Petrus XX checked down to his big fullback and the fullback rumbled downfield. By the time the Estope secondary realized what was happening, he was already 15 yards downfield. Quinton Derby was the first to make it to the fullback, but he proved unable to bring him down. However, Derby did set him off balance and Alejandro Salmi would finish the job a few yards later. The pass had gone for a gain of 18 yards.

The following play saw King Petrus XX take a running lane to scramble for 11 yards before sliding down. Then, he found Ioannes Lusius on a quick slant and picked up 9 more yards. Calling a draw play out of the shotgun formation on second and 1, Prince Petrus handed off to Ancharius and watched his fullback pick up a first down. Soon, the Sanctii offense was knocking on the door of Estope's red zone. It looked for certain that they would take at least a 24 to 22 lead, if not score a touchdown and take a big lead.

Then, disaster struck. It was a designed QB run. However, an opportunistic Tony Tibbs got a hand on the ball, knocking it out of the hands of the Sanctii quarterback. A pile formed and the officials came over to clear the wreckage and find out who had the ball. Underneath the pile, Ioannes Conconius had possession of the ball, but Andrew Gomez would not accept that. He kept fighting and fighting and eventually forced the ball out of the hands of Conconius and into his own hands. When the pile was cleared, it appeared that Gomez had recovered the fumble, even though Conconius had actually recovered it. Nobody would ever know what had really happened underneath that pile, except for the men who were down there, in the trenches, fighting for the fumble.

Estope would manage to get the ball to midfield. However, an Andreas Cammius sack on 3rd and short forced an appearance by punter Mark Weise. Weise placed his punt perfectly, in the coffin corner. This pinned the Sanctii offense near their own goal line with around 8 minutes to go, down a point. This time, King Petrus XX took the field in an 4-wide empty formation. It was obvious that he was going to pass.

Estope brought the heat, hoping for a safety that would give them a 3 point advantage. Instead, the King of Saintland found Thomas Lusius on a drag route. Lusius had used his speed to get open and now he would run for substantial yards after the catch, moving the ball to the 14 yard line. On the next down, Maximius came into the game, replacing Thomas Lusius. Now, the Sanctii offense lined up with Ioannes Lusius all alone on the right side and 2 receivers, plus a tight end on the left side of the line.

While it looked like the play would go to the strongside, King Petrus XX decided to run the option to the weakside. Catching the defense under-manned on the weakside, King Petrus XX ran into a tackler while pitching the ball to Maximius. Ioannes Lusius blocked Nikolaos Tillens, leaving plenty of room for Maximius to run. Maximius would be tackled at the 36 yard line after blowing the game wide open. This gave the Sanctii quarterback confidence is his back. He would call a sweep on the very next play and Maximius would rush for 8 more yards.

After an incomplete pass on second down, Ancharius and Lucas Matius came in for 3rd down. Out of the I-formation, with Ancharius as the deep back, King Petrus took the snap and handed the ball to his first-string fullback. Ancharius bulldozed through Brent Mork, but would be gang-tackled by the Estope linebackers after he had secured the first down. Now, the Kingdom of Saintland had a first down at their own 49, just shy of midfield.

Now, they were 51 yards away from the end zone, with just over 5 minutes to go. After a screen pass to Loreius was stuffed in the backfield and a Maximius run was stopped at the line, there were now around 4 minutes to go and it was 3rd and long. The King of Saintland came out in the shotgun formation with 5 wide. As he looked for a target, he noticed that Ioannes Oranius was in a mis-match against a safety. The #5 receiver on the Saintland National Team's roster hauled in the pass for a first down at the 40.

Several pass plays later, there was now around a minute to go, Estope out of time outs, and it was Sanctii ball, first and goal. King Petrus XX decided to call a toss play to Maximius. Maximius had a wide-open lane and decided to go in for the touchdown, rather than lay down at the 1-yard line. This was not what King Petrus XX wanted. He had wanted his running back to lay down at the one. Then, he would position the ball in the center of the field and take a knee. Once the clock ran down to 3 seconds or so, he would call time out and Francus would come in to kick a glorified extra point for the win. However, that did not happen. However, King Petrus XX would take an awkward step and come up hurting.

This left him unable to go for the 2-point conversion. Instead of allowing one of the backup QBs, who had performed so incompetently against Macquarrie, to go for 2, the King of Saintland ordered the kicker onto the field for an extra point. He kicked it through and Saintland led 28 to 22. Moments later, Francus would put the kickoff entirely out of the end zone for a touchback.

Estope took the field at the 20, desperately trying to move the ball downfield and score some additional points. However, Thomas Calventius broke through the line, sacking their quarterback. This proved to be disastrous for the World Bowl hosts, significantly decreasing the amount of time remaining on the clock. A desperation pass by Noll Walen would be caught by Seth Akker, but Akker was tackled in-bounds at the Sanctii 22 yard line. The 85 thousand fans in attendance at Freeport Field and all of the Estope players could only watch helplessly as the clock ticked down to 0. The Saintland National Team had, once again, escaped with a win despite a myriad of injuries.

by **Cassadaigua** » Sun May 04, 2014 11:13 pm

Fillies Intercept Firebirds' Chances,
by Meghan Comrie- Beat Writer, Concord Heights Times

There were criticisms of the team after the loss to The Fair Republic. As reporters got bored with getting on the case of coach Kaitlyn Rinaldi, especially because she was acknowledging she deserved it (and where’s the fun in picking on someone that realizes they may have made a mistake?), the focus turned to the defensive line. Leading up to the game, they seemed to have played alright. Not necessarily stellar, but good enough. The Fair Republic was a different opponent: they wanted to play it on the ground, and with the lack of a key defensive stop, most began to doubt these linemen. “We were humiliated,” stated defensive tackle Tricia Dimura, “They ran over us, and we just couldn’t match up. Whenever we made a big play on a set of downs, they nullified our positive with a clutch play of their own that kept the chains moving. That, to me, led me to be embarrassed. We are all better then that.”

Next on the schedule for the Fillies would be a journey to The Benevolence Bowl, in Dynapolis, Osarius to take on the team expected to be the top threat to Cassadaigua. The Firebirds have established a strong history for themselves in the World Bowl, but the teams have generally not been paired up to oppose one another all that often. In fact, it may seem as though the countries have had more key soccer games between them, then football games. This would prove to be a great test for Jessica Minor at quarterback, going up against a high quality secondary that the Firebirds have. That is something that wouldn’t catch coach Kaitlyn Rinaldi, an ex- defensive back, by surprise, “That’s a great group of DB’s back there. When you play against a group like that, you have to accept that they are going to make some big plays against you. That said, Jessica has a great attitude against them.” Minor said she was looking forward to playing the Osarius secondary, “I want to play the best. It’s how I am. Granted, I will only play the best secondary in the world during a team practice, but they are right up there if you want to call them maybe the second best.”

The Firebirds won the coin toss, and elected to receive, and picked up a field goal from their opening drive. In her fearless manner, Minor did not back down from the challenge of throwing against the secondary, and the Dagans picked up a lucky break on their first possession. Hi’ro Manaka’li made a great play on a pass intended for Tiffany Gordon and seemed to deflect it out of harms way. However, the deflection ended up heading right into the direction of Chelsea Carrillo, who read the play, and with no one in the vicinity to make a stop, took it the necessary 66 yards for a touchdown. Moments later, the Dagan secondary struck with an interception by Kimberly Mason, who returned it 26 yards for a score to make it 14-3. On their next possession, the Firebirds picked up another field goal, and then made a play on Minor. Manaka’li, this time, was able to intercept the Dagan quarterback, and took it 30 yards for the score. Curiously, Osarious attempted a conversion here that could have drew them level at 14, but instead, Aaron Poynter was stopped just shy of the goal line on the try, and the score remained 14-12, which is where we were after one quarter of play.

Cassadaigua did a good job establishing the ground game a little bit, with Crystal Amodeo the primary runner, but Stacie Meehan got a few carries as well. This, as well as the next drive, ended up in Adrienne Morales’ field goals (33 and 38 yards), to make it 20-12, but at least the Fillies were starting to show they needed to be feared on the ground as well. As after all you are not going to defeat Osarius if you do not. Just as it seemed as though the Firebirds were going to scre a TD before halftime, their came a turning point. Shannon Jackson intercepted a Luke Saint pass, and returned it 92 yards for a touchdown. Osarius never seemed to be able to recover from this, going three and out on their next possession, and allowing the Dagans to get a quick field goal before halftime to go up 30-12 at halftme.

“Shannon’s interception was the play of the game,” said coach Rinaldi, “If not for that, the whole complexion of this game might have been different. Thanks to this play, we went into halftime feeling very good about ourselves, and the way the second half began didn’t hurt, either.” No, it didn’t. Heather Sullivan took the opening kickoff of the second half 104 yards for a touchdown to extend the Fillies lead further. “Downing the ball wasn’t a consideration as I saw the coverage I had,” Sullivan said when asked about the play after, “I felt I could easily get it to the 25 maybe the 35, so I went for it. Then the blocks just went my way, and I got to do what all returners love to do, and open up a half with a touchdown.” Osarius did respond with a touchdown drive, but a 14-play, 80-yard drive, taking 9:03 off the clock by Cassadaigua, ending with a one-yard run by Jessica Kline kept their from being any chances of an upset. In case there was still doubt, Adrienne Lewis intercepted a Saint pass in the 4th quarter and took it 17 yards to make it 51-19 in favor of Cassadaigua. The Firebirds did score in garbage time against Dagan backups.

Overall, this was about as good of a game as Cassadaigua could have had. Interestingly enough, Jessica Minor’s stats won’t make you think the team had 51 points, but that was the case. Cornerback Shannon Jackson told us after, “As a secondary, we wanted to show Osarius that we are still the best in the business. We were excited for this game, and I think that showed. Maybe we’ll be able to do it in front of the home fans as well.” This game concluded the first half of qualifying, and at 4-1, Cassadaigua leads the group and is in good form.

by **HopNation** » Mon May 05, 2014 7:43 am

HopNation Handball
Throwing a Prolate Spheroid from End Zone to End Zone
The Group
The Fire Ponies edge out the Ironworkers and take the top spot in Group H. Then our very own Malts came away with their first win of this World Bowl, hopefully they can keep winning now that they have found the right side of the scoreboard. Now they did play Icatus a team that had been somewhat surprising in the sheer number of points they score. However, they can’t seem to win and we may have to adjust the predicted finishing positions. The final game of the group saw somebody play McKleigh, not sure what all happened there but a final score was posted and McKleigh found them selves with another win, with that win they moved ahead of Menukten on the table. Here is a quick look at our prediction from a couple games ago.
1st: Equestrian States
2nd: Karditan
3rd: McKleigh
4th: Icatus
5th: HopNation
6th: Menukten
If HopNation can continue to win they may find a way to climb up the ladder, but a chance of qualifying past the group stage seems out of reach at this point, as EQ and Karditan will win at least two games each going forward enough to hold those first two spots. McKleigh continues to play well and we still see them finishing in third at this point, unless they have a breakdown and don’t win anymore game. We still don’t see the Silents or who ever they are winning any more games. Icatus also will not win anymore, except maybe when they play Menukten, so those two will be at the bottom of the table if things continue the way they have the last two match days. Only time will tell….
The Game
Malt’s Schedule            | Result | Malts’ Record
MD1:  @ McKleigh	   | 16-17  | (0-1)
MD2:  @ Karditan	   | 16-24  | (0-2)
MD3:  vs Menukten          | 13-22  | (0-3)
MD4:  @ Equestrian States  | 16-10  | (0-4)
MD5:  @ Icatus	           | 38-26  | (1-4)
MD6:  vs McKleigh	   | ~-~    | (-)
MD7:  vs Karditan	   | ~-~    | (-)
MD8:  @ Menukten           | ~-~    | (-)
MD9:  vs Equestrian States | ~-~    | (-)
MD10: vs Icatus	           | ~-~    | (-)
Malts are home/away
Malts score listed first in all games
Malts record is post that game
Win|Loss 
HopNation (Malts) @ Icatus, Somewhere in Icatus
HopNation traveled to Icatus for the last game of the first leg and managed to come way with a win. The team allowed 26 but scored 38 to come way on the correct side of the scorecard. The Malt Marauders held Icatus to just 210 total offensive yards, not their best performance on defense but they did hold them to just a single offensive score. Icatus actually scored first in this game and it was on the opening kick-off as their return man made the Malts special teams unit look like Swiss Cheese, 0-7. Then the Malts answered right back with a nice return by Deck Weswes as he provided the offense with a very short field. His kick return placed them on the Icatus 15 yard line. From there AP Goreyou ran it in on the next play to make it 7-7, after the PAT of course. The first quarter would end with this same 7-7 score as the two teams seemed to be feeling each other out a bit. In the second quarter Sappy Randle blindsided the Icatus QB causing a fumble, which Allen Mathistuck Pepper picked up and rumbled in for a score and after the PAT the Malts were up 14-7. On the ensuing kick-off the Icatus return man, who made the special teams of HopNation look like a certain holy kind of cheese, miss judged the flight of the ball and it smacked him in the helmet and bounce about 10 yards forward, luckily an Icatus player jumped on the loose ball and they maintained possession. However that was short lived as Atwaters Polamalalu intercepted the very next pass and gave the Malts excellent field position on the 30 yard line of Icatus. Fran Bradanning called two plays on this drive, a run to the right which AP Goreyou scampered down to the 12 yard line and then a pass play which Crydez Fitzjerry hauled in for the 12 yard score. Now the Malts had a somewhat comfortable lead 21-7, but Icatus answered back before the half with a punt return of 67 yards and as the teams went into the locker rooms it was 21-14. On the opening kick-off of the second half Deck Weswes ran out to the Malts 45 and then flipped the ball, just as he was being hit, to Owme Hairisson who continued the forward progress of the ball and into the Icatus end zone, Malts lead 28-14. Icatus would mount a little offense on the next drive but eventually were made to punt by the Malt Marauders. Slargent Mossy was in for the punt return, not sure why as Deck Weswes usually gets all the kick returns, punts and kick-offs. Mossy caught the ball and started running, he was met by three Icatus defenders and hit hard. The ball came loose and an Icatus player picked the ball up and ran in for the easy score, 28-20 as the Icatus kicker missed the PAT. The rest of the third quarter was all three and outs with little to no offensive action by either team. At the start of the Fourth quarter the Icatus team got the ball into Malts territory and kicked a 43 yard field goal making it 28-23 and brought them within one TD, could the Malts hold on? Well on the next kick-off Deck Weswes again return the ball into great field position for the Malts and left Fran Bradanning with only 35 yards left. However they could not get into the end zone and had to settle for a field goal, now 31-23. Once again the kick returner for Icatus made the special teams of the Malts look like Swiss Cheese and got the ball to the Malts 40. Icatus would move the ball just 3 yards and settled for a field goal, score now 31-26. The Malts would managed to get some offense going but after 5 plays Fran Bradanning would throw an interception when they were deep in Icatus territory stopping their drive. Icatus would try a run play around the end, which was met by Dwight Abraliams and Huffer Nitschky. Nitschky would get his hands on the ball and stripped the running back. Singlebert Buttkis who was following the play grabbed the loose ball and ran in for the score, and this is where the game would end 38-26.

Next up for the Malts is McKleigh, this time at home in Fressen Hundefutter Stadion.
The Gauntlet
HopNation vs Mckleigh, Fressen Hundefutter Stadion (78,000 cap) in Wortwort Hefebayern

Next up for the Malts is McKleigh a side that just edged out the Malts in the very first game 17-16. Hopefully the Malts are on top of their game and can come away with a win this time. The team needs to focus on it’s offense a little more as it seems the defense is clicking right now. Look for the Malt Marauders to hold the McKleigh side under 20 points and for the Malts to score in the mid to upper 20s this time around.

Lets stay on the winning side …until next time Brew On, Brew Well Hoptonians!

by **Timbermunich** » Mon May 05, 2014 8:41 am

Part 1: The Beginning

Legend of The Great Battle Axe
Part 1: The Beginning

Year 47 TBM: The Search
After crafting the handle and presenting it to his son Great Battle needed to find the proper stone to create the head of the new axe. He along with Great One-Arm Willy set out a few months after Great Battle’s sons’ birthday to locate the perfect stone. At the time the two Greats left in search of the perfect stone they were unaware that Artemis was still keeping a secret from her husband, which their son, Battle along with the other children of the greats, seemed to ignite the blades of both Great Battle and Great One-Arm Willy’s axes when ever they were near. She along with Juniper was sure to always have their husbands axe heads sheathed whenever near the children. They hoped that this would pass and that the children did not have any special abilities as their fathers did. So, both Artemis and Juniper let their spouses leave in their search but they knew in order to find the perfect stone they would need to have Battle with them. The two Greats traveled for almost a year, searching all over Timbermunich for stone that would be suitable for an axe head. Every quarry they came to had excellent rock in it, but to find this perfect stone the two would first tap the stone with the butt of their haft, if the stone did not crack they would then tap it with the blunt end of Great Battles’ axe. If again the stone did not crack they would perform one final test, they would take a full swing with a chunk of Lightning Log at the stone. So far on their search had had only found three deposits that made it past the first test. Only one of these three made it past the second test, but when the full swing of the Lightning Log was made the stone shattered into a fine powder. They knew this was going to be an extremely long search, to find the perfect stone would take something special, something which no one had found yet and that the two Greats were determined to locate. At the end of the first year of searching they returned home to spend a bit of time with the village, their families and make sure the rest of Timbermunich was still following their path to control the grove around the other villages. All seemed to be in order when they came back and the two enjoyed some time playing with their children. Both Artemis and Juniper would become pregnant at this time so Great Battle and Great One-Arm Willy decided to postpone their search until after their children were born, Great Battles sixed and Great One-Arm Willy’s second children. Great One-Arm Willy’s wife Juniper would give birth to another boy and in his excitement Great One-Arm Willy went running to see Great Battle. Artemis was in labor when Great One-Arm Willy came running in, forgetting Great Battles wife’s wishes he ran right in with his Double Bit Felling Axe in hand, as he came closer the blade lit up with a splendid glow and grew brighter as he came closer. As the child, a girl this time was born the axe head seemed to start pulsing. Artemis’s fear of her husband and friend finding out about the children was realized with the delivery of Great Battles first girl. The two men rejoiced in their new heirs, but then after the realization of the axe head’s reaction set in they both rushed out of the hut and into Great One-Arm Willy’s hut to see if the same thing happened with the second heir to Great One-Arm Willy. It did, and the two again rejoiced. A few days after the two births the families gathered and invited the rest of the village, not only to meet the new arrivals but to also reveal this new found Greatness as they felt it was only right to disclose it to the rest of the villagers. The villagers were more than excited to meet the new additions to the community, they declared a celebration be held for the two since they were born on the same day. But as the conversation continued and Great Battle revealed the Greatness within the children a few villagers grew scared. But the two families quickly eased this nervousness and assured the village that everything with the children, the village, the Heart of the Grove, and all of Timberminuch was safe. The village once again started talks of a great celebration and plans were set into place to hold a Great Timbermunich Forest celebration.

To be continued…

by **German Zerabithea** » Mon May 05, 2014 10:46 am

Manuel threw the ball, it hanged in the air seemingly forever, but finally hit its mark. The crowd cheers at the sight.

It had been a month since he had seen the game of "football" as he was told it was called. The foreigner with the ten-gallon hat had introduced himself as Mr. House (though whether that was his real name or just a way to keep his identity safe he didn't know) and seeing that the kid was interested, gave him a football he had in his truck. "What's your name kid?" The man asked.

"Manuel." he replied. "Manuel Quarez"

"Well Manuel, how about this? Seems like you've taken an interest in these games. If you can figure out how to throw this ball, I'll let you watch the games for free."

So for the next month he tried and tried to get the throwing motion correct, when he wasn't working on the farm, he was practicing. No matter what though, he couldn't get the ball to fly the way the man on the TV could. By the time he and his sister came once more to town, he still could not figure it out. "I don't see how this is fair." He told to Mr. House. "I have nothing to go by but what I've seen on the TV."

But Mr. House would not budge. "Not my problem." He would imply. "You're lucky I've been this nice in the first place."

It was early, far earlier than anyone in the family would ever be up. He had set up a bunch of cans and standing back a pace would attempt to hit them with the ball.

"It's the flick of the wrist."

He turned to find his father watching him.

"Oh, father!" Manuel replied, attempting to hide the ball. "I didn't hear you"

"You've been acting tired as of late, figured you had to be doing something when everyone was asleep, and sure enough."

"Let me explain..."

"No need.' His father replied. "Your sister has already told me about how you've been obsessing with that damn TV that rich Zerabithean has been touting along."

"I'll get her for this." Manuel thought to himself, unable to think of a proper response. Finally though, he realized something. "Wait... you know how to throw the ball?"

"I played when I had gone to college, till I realized my life was with the farm." His father replied. "Something I had hoped would resonate with you."

His father had always been serious about farming. In his mind, tradition was everything, he always talked about keeping to the old ways, but it never resonated with Manuel, he wanted more in life than the farm. Finally, after a moment of silence, his dad spoke once again. "Well? Try again, put your fingers around like this." And he guided Manuel's hard properly around the ball.

"Wait... So you're fine with me doing this?"

His dad shoke his dead. " No I'm not, but I'm going to show you anyways, and once you do, you'll see how frivolous this is and get back on the right track."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Well I'll be damned!" Bellowed Mr. House with a great laugh. "To be honest, I'd didn't expect you to actually go through with it. And what a arm! Some QB's would kill for precision like that."

Manuel picked up the ball and brought it back to Mr. House. "Well, a deal's a deal." Mr. House said as he grabbed the ball. "Enjoy the game."

"No."

"No?" House replied back. "Then why did you go to all the trouble?"

Manuel looked the man directly in the eyes.

"I don't want to watch football, I want to go up north and play it. And I want you to help me."

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by **McKleigh** » Mon May 05, 2014 11:56 am

We don't remember playing a game or traveling no less. Yet we are told we have another victory. We don't remember against who. We just don't remember. Once aagin this is much like the Baptism of Ironwe don't remember playing as it was hosted by a nation we don't remember. Possibly the same nation for both events, but no one can recall for sure. But much like the Baptism of Iron, we only know some numbers and stats we don't remember compiling or who gave them to us. At the end of Baptism of Iron 16 we are told all teams were tied, and thus all ranked 106th. Likewise we are told we scored 23 points on two passing and one rushing TD and a field goal and one missed extra point try. The opposition apperantly scored one touchdown and one FG for 10 points total. We are now 2-3, though we can only recall 4 games being played.

Half way through the season and we are on a roll! Darren MacTruck is now 79 of 128 with 704 yards and 6TD against 1Int with his favorite target being Devan McAdams having 30 receptions and 364 yards and 4 TD. McKurse has now rushed for 298 yards and 2 scores and on defense Christson is shining with 34 tackles and 7 sacks while McPhillips leads in intercetions with 4. Full team stats can now be found on the roster page, link below.
viewtopic.php?p=19823680#p19823680

Tonight we match up once again against HopNation who has struggled. While some give them the edge as we barely won by one at home we still see McKleigh as edging the Malts out once again. Our first meeting was our first World Bowl Game ever, unless you count the Baptism of Iron 16, but does it count if you can't remember it? Since then McKleigh has made some adjustments and have improved their offense the last two games to give their already tough defense some help. Also, McKleigh lacked their starting QB for most the game and the backup was horrendous, like our spelling. We see this as another defensive and low scoring affair with Mckleigh winning on improved offense and superior special teams. Look for a score of 20-17 in favor of McKleigh, and expect the winning score to be made in the final seconds.

2-3 Mckleigh's Schedule,ranks in prenthesis, Mckleigh is ranked t106
W 17-16 28-4 vs HopNation (33) McKleigh City Coliseum in McKleigh City, McKleigh
L 10-33 29-4 @ Icatus (t106) location TBA
L 26-53 30-4 vs Equestrian States (9) McKleigh City Coliseum in McKleigh City, McKleigh
L 3-43 1-5 vs Karditan (12) McKleigh City Coliseum in McKleigh City, McKleigh
W 23-10 2-5 @ Menukten (t106) *note-we know they have a stadium and we have read a description but we seem to forget the information immediatly after reading it, we advise not attempting to attend as we for some reason feel you won't remember the game, but we can't remember why we feel that way.
5-5 @ HopNation (33) Fressen Hundefutter Stadion in Wortwort, Hefebayern
6-5 vs Icatus (t106) McKleigh City Coliseum in McKleigh City, McKleigh
7-5 @ Equestrian States (9) The Royal Coliseum in Canterlot, Equestrian States
8-5 @ Karditan (12) Construction Site in Detroit, Karditan
9-5 vs Menuketen (t106) McKleigh City Coliseum in McKleigh City, McKleigh *note-admision to this game is free, as you will likley not remember McKleigh playing anyone, but we don't remember why you won't remember.

by **Anditia** » Mon May 05, 2014 12:46 pm

Anditia destroys New South Aqmuland
Hannah D'Aub -- NEW SOUTH AQMULAND

"Its a trap!" Shouted one of the fans attending the Wolves most recent game in New South Aqmuland. And that seemed to be the theme of the first 7 minutes of the game as NSA came out to a rousing 10-3 lead early on in the game. Luckily for the entire Wolves team, the trap suddenly dissintegrated leaving the NSA team attempting to guide a vessel up a river of excrement.

"I guess it could have been a trap game if we didn't keep our head out of our respective be-hinds. But we removed our heads and actually got quite a good scare in the process" head Coach Nestor Gregori stated in the post game interview. "After their running back scampered 50 yards on our defenses, we truly shut them down. To be honest, their team is a joke and shouldn't be playing on the international stage."

Shut down is an understatement to a defense that only allowed a total of four positive yardage plays throughout the game including the 50 yard touchdown run by the NSA runningback on their opening drive.

"It really shows what happens if you fall asleep on a play." LB Johnny D'Urbo stated in an interview. D'Urbo continued on to dominate the NSA team with 2.5 sacks through the rest of the game one of which forced a fumble that was returned by DE Germaine Shambo for a touchdown.

Team        | Q1 | Q2 | Q3 | Q4 | F  
NSA         | 10 |  0 |  0 |  0 | 10
Anditia     |  3 | 24 | 14 |  0 | 41

Anditon Scorers:
Q1: FG Melgar 27 yds
Q2: TD Ubererra 17 yds
    TD St. Onges from Borst 12 yds
    TD Pai from Borst 32 yds
    FG Melgar
Q3: TD Dahl INT (22 yd return)
    TD Shambo FUM (17 yd return - forced by D'Urbo)
Q4: None

The Wolves were able to pick apart the NSA team both through the air (Borst had 337 yards passing for 3 TDs) and on the ground - Uberrara had 127 yards rushing and a TD before being sat midway through the 3rd quarter. With an interception and a fumble returned for TDs, the game was not much of a contest for the Wolves who, following their rest days, will replay the first part of their schedule largely playing at home: vs Quackmybush, vs Estope, at Macquarrie, vs Saintland, vs NSA.

For the second half, we expect similar outcomes to finish 3-2 in the second half, 6-4 overall. Though, we would not be surprised if we finished with one more win at 7-3. Nonetheless, it should be a close finish in Group E.

by **Estope** » Mon May 05, 2014 1:17 pm

MATCHDAY 6

Cassadaigua 14, Hutt River 3
Osarius 30, Hamamatsu 10
The Fair Republic 24, Free Republics 17

Group A Standings

   Team                   P  W D  L  For   Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Cassadaigua            6  5 0  1  214  120  +94  15
 2 Osarius                6  4 0  2  179  158  +21  12
 3 The Fair Republic      6  3 0  3  169  129  +40   9
 4 Free Republics         6  2 0  4  176  205  -29   6
 5 Hutt River             6  2 0  4  119  194  -75   6
 6 Hamamatsu              6  2 0  4  121  172  -51   6

The Royal Kingdom of Quebec 24, Estenia 7
Vettrera 29, Kykid8 6
New North Aqmuland 3, Jeckland 29

Group B Standings

   Team                             P  W D  L  For   Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Estenia                          6  5 0  1  127  106  +21  15
 2 New North Aqmuland               6  3 0  3  101  107   -6   9
 3 The Royal Kingdom of Quebec      6  3 0  3  144  111  +33   9
 4 Vettrera                         6  3 0  3  118  127   -9   9
 5 Jeckland                         6  2 0  4  127  146  -19   6
 6 Kykid8                           6  2 0  4  106  126  -20   6

Unolia 23, The Royal Barangay 30
Taeshan 26, Zenic 19
Ati Kaluraya 23, The Glorious Commune 20

Group C Standings

   Team                      P  W D  L  For   Ag   +/- Pts
 1 Taeshan                   6  6 0  0  203   97  +106  18
 2 Ati Kaluraya              6  5 0  1  156   95   +61  15
 3 Unolia                    6  2 0  4  146  152    -6   6
 4 The Glorious Commune      6  2 0  4  124  196   -72   6
 5 The Royal Barangay        6  2 0  4  121  147   -26   6
 6 Zenic                     6  1 0  5  101  164   -63   3

German Zerabithea 17, Mochria 10
Allamunnic States 14, The Tidal Wake 3
Super-Llamaland 24, Levivania 27 (F/OT)

Group D Standings

   Team                   P  W D  L  For   Ag  +/- Pts
 1 German Zerabithea      6  5 0  1  134   92  +42  15
 2 Allamunnic States      6  4 0  2  116  123   -7  12
 3 The Tidal Wake         6  3 0  3   89   90   -1   9
 4 Levivania              6  3 0  3  168  177   -9   9
 5 Super-Llamaland        6  2 0  4  136  141   -5   6
 6 Mochria                6  1 0  5  101  121  -20   3

Saintland 10, New South Aqmuland 0
Estope 47, Macquarrie 14
Anditia 30, Quackmybush 9

Group E Standings

   Team                    P  W D  L  For   Ag   +/- Pts
 1 Saintland               6  5 0  1  150  121   +29  15
 2 Anditia                 6  4 0  2  166   98   +68  12
 3 New South Aqmuland      6  3 0  3  104  137   -33   9
 4 Estope                  6  3 0  3  186  148   +38   9
 5 Macquarrie              6  3 0  3  127  126    +1   9
 6 Quackmybush             6  0 0  6   96  199  -103   0

Darmen 13, Hicana 0
Cosumar 23, Darvale 16
New Wolfopolis 9, Democratic States of Fenbar 29

Group F Standings

   Team                             P  W D  L  For   Ag   +/- Pts
 1 Darmen                           6  6 0  0  213   84  +129  18
 2 Cosumar                          6  3 0  3  127  140   -13   9
 3 New Wolfopolis                   6  3 0  3  106  142   -36   9
 4 Democratic States of Fenbar      6  3 0  3  133  134    -1   9
 5 Darvale                          6  3 0  3  136  131    +5   9
 6 Hicana                           6  0 0  6   75  159   -84   0

Ko-oren 51, Timbermunich 9
Gregoryisgodistan 33, Alparia 10
San Jose Guayabal 9, Nassau-Hessen 10

Group G Standings

   Team                   P  W D  L  For   Ag   +/- Pts
 1 Ko-oren                6  6 0  0  229  104  +125  18
 2 Gregoryisgodistan      6  4 0  2  189  122   +67  12
 3 San Jose Guayabal      6  3 0  3  117  115    +2   9
 4 Nassau-Hessen          6  3 0  3  142  148    -6   9
 5 Timbermunich           6  2 0  4  100  170   -70   6
 6 Alparia                6  0 0  6   91  209  -118   0

Equestrian States 3, Icatus 13
Karditan 14, Menukten 22
HopNation 12, McKleigh 3

Group H Standings

   Team                   P  W D  L  For   Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Equestrian States      6  5 0  1  149  112  +37  15
 2 Karditan               6  4 0  2  173  101  +72  12
 3 Menukten               6  3 0  3  120  142  -22   9
 4 HopNation              6  2 0  4  105  108   -3   6
 5 Icatus                 6  2 0  4  135  134   +1   6
 6 McKleigh               6  2 0  4   82  167  -85   6

Clinched Group
Clinched Playoffs
Cannot Win Group
Eliminated from Playoff Contention

Please note a small change in the schedule as there will now be a bye in between the last matchday of the group stages and the first round of the playoffs.

by **The Fair Republic** » Mon May 05, 2014 7:07 pm

Buck Naters is pacing around the sideline. One minute, thirty five seconds left in the game vs The Free Republics, tied at 17 and with the Toucans getting possession at the Free Republic's seven yard line due to a perfect punt by Emppu Vatanen. The one weakness for the Toucans which everyone knew was to stop the running game from dominating the possession and force Williams to pass often and early. The Free Republics did just that by blitzing early and often and giving no room to either Crawford or Jermichael. The lack of a running attack showed as the Free Republics led 14-0 at half time. To nullify the almost constant pressure on the backs, Naters used screens and dump passes to spread out the defense giving more room for the backs. A Brandon Yarlson field goal early in the 4th tied the game at 17. From there it looked like the game was going to overtime as neither team could get an advantage over the other. Williams walked on the field and everyone wondered as they have since he took over the job, did he have what it takes to lead a comeback in the final seconds. He silenced all critics going 7-8 and throwing 23 yard bullet to Ryan Smith in the corner of the end zone with 7 seconds left to give the Toucans the lead and the game. "Credit coach for drawing up a great game plan for those final two minutes." A clearly relieved Williams said after the game. "The offensive line was able to give me enough time to look down field and the receivers ran perfect routes and cuts an were able to get open. Every single player on the offence made the plays they needed and we came out with the victory. Now we have to prepare for the Osarius game tomorrow to have a chance to qualify to the next round."

Scoring Summary:

1st Quarter:
FFR: 12 yard pass from Drasko Pecar to Pusztay Adojan, 7-0 FFR (7:32)

2nd Quarter:
FFR: 26 yard run by Drasko Pecar, 14-0 FFR (3:17)

3rd Quarter:
TFR: 2 yard run by Darius T Jermichael V, 14-7 FFR (11:57)
FFR: 45 yard field goal by Jaromir Zuyev, 17-7 FFR (5:02)
TFR: 8 yard pass from Buck Williams to Brain Udderson, 17-14 FFR (2:19)

4th Quarter:
TFR: 52 yard field goal by Brandon Yarlson, 17-17 (13:48)
TFR: 22 yard pass from Buck Williams to Ryan Smith, 24-17 TFR (0:07)

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