World Cup 67 - RP Thread

by **Maineiacs** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 4:28 pm

Back home almost immediately after the match, the Tie-Dyeds were called to a practice and team meeting. Everyone was tired, but they all had learned better than to go against anything that Coach Wilson wanted. All you could really do was grumble under your breath and go to sleep at night with visions of him being dismembered playing in your head. It was impossible to like the man, but also impossible to deny that his draconian methods got results. Sarah Thomas paused to catch her breath in the middle of running passing drills. She was feeling totally winded.

"Thomas!" yelled Wilson, "Pick up the pace! You're not timing your run to match Mata! Crawl along like that during the next match, and he'll be called offside every time!"

"Not if he runs my legs off." said Mata as he passed by her. Everyone was feeling the strain, and it was only the end of Day 1.

Wilson's trademark harangue was in rare form at the meeting.

"The backfield can not afford to stand around looking confused for the first 10-15 minutes of the match like they did today! What the hell was wrong with you all? You're supposed to be competitors, not spectators! Greater Britannia was a team of unranked nobodies; Starblaydia is ranked 28th in the Multiverse! You do that tomorrow and it'll 6-0 before the referee's whistle stops blowing to start the game! And mark your men! You are supposed to block them and take possession from them, not escort them to the net! You were all giving them too much room! It was sheer luck that you won today, because I certainly saw no sign of talent! Hit the showers and then get back to the hotel and get some rest, then resolve yourselves to coming to the stadium tomorrow to play soccer like the professionals you're supposed to be!"

Sarah flung herself on to the bed in the hotel room she was sharing with Karen Novak. "Ugh! I can hardly move! Everything aches! I swear I'd strangle that man if I could lift my arms long enough."

Karen said "I'd like to know what's wrong with Coach McDillon. That woman is never this meek and subordinate. I've been with her team for three years, and I've never seen her stay this quiet. Mark my words, she'll only put up with this for so long."

"Well, I hope she asserts herself soon. We're all going to be too sore and exhausted to play if he keeps this up."

From MSPN --

As Maineiacs prepares for their first home game in the World Cup, One wonders how we'll fair against one of the top teams in the Multiverse. Every aspect of Starblaydia's aggressive game is strong, and our team, with their more defensive style of play may have trouble adjusting to the pace. Starblaydia is one of the early picks to advance from our Group, so tomorrow could be said to be Maineiacs' first real test; the first real measurement of just where we stand against the teams in this tournament.

by **Saintland** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 4:41 pm

Sister Polus's Thoughts

Hello, I am Sister Maria Polus, High Inquisitor and Headmistress of Progress High School and I am joining you today on Sanctustube to discuss several matters that have come to my attention lately. First, I wish to begin by just saying how proud I am of my nephews, but most of all Andreas. As you should already know, they are currently attending the University of St. Augustinus, where they are competing on the gridiron team. This gridiron team is currently 6-0 in the current season of NSCF and is, in their first season, considered a serious contender to not only win the Celestia Conference, but also to win the NSCF Championship itself. Like the rest of you, I cannot understand why they call it the Celestia Conference, since that sounds like something those demonic talking horses that stole our World Cup would come up with, but regardless I am proud of my nephew Andreas for his success in the Celestia Conference and for proving that actual student-athletes from God's Kingdom can beat pretend students from foreign lands.

I want to address, as well, the announcement by King Paulus XV that the under-performing current incarnation of the National Baseball Team will be scrapped entirely prior to the 29th World Baseball Classic. Over the past year, we have competed in 4 World Baseball Classics and have only a single playoff appearance to show for it. That is simply unacceptable. Yes, I will never forget how great it was to see Cassadaigua eliminated on their home turf, even while, God willing, I'm spending eternity in Caelum. That was a truly great moment, but it was the only great moment that this sorry excuse for a baseball team ever had. More typical was when their original captain, a most wicked man, was caught soliciting prostitutes in a public restroom. Actually, I just caught 2 students at my school holding hands in the hallway just the other day. If you don't put a stop to such conduct, soon they will be kissing. Then, they will be taking peeks under each other's clothes and before too long they are fornicating with one another! You have to nip that in the bud or you'll end up with a school full of pregnant sluts and "guys" who have been around so many sluts that they have forgotten the proper way to treat a lady.

Unfortunately, I must also talk about that farce that is being called the World Cup. Already, this World Cup has seen vigilante justice as some country from the middle of nowhere tried to arrest the captain of the Free Republics National Team. While Mr. Bolton probably did something wrong and I encourage all parties to look at the evidence and avoid a rush to judgment or a rush to exonerate. Instead, you should just look at the evidence available to you and work out a compromise. Yes, Bolton is clearly a lustful young man, but young men who are not civilized by Christianity tend to be driven by their bodily passions. This is just another one of the many tricks of Satanas. This is exactly why other nations, even if you foolishly want to reject the other parts of the teachings of the Faith, should still accept God's views regarding reproduction, marriage and family. In Saintland, Kyle Bolton would not have grown up in an environment in which he is encouraged to give in to his lusts and commit grievous sins. In Saintland, the girl from Felix, whose name I will not repeat out of respect for her privacy, would have been taught to carry herself with more class and probably wouldn't have ended up in that kind of situation to begin with. We are criticized for our views regarding fornication, yet women in our Kingdom are at virtually no risk of rape. In Saintland, women can walk the streets without having to fear rapists. Yes, women have to sacrifice their freedoms to impersonate men, to tempt men and to be a slut, but trust me when I tell you that the sacrifice is worth it. When you permit sins, even those that supposedly "harm nobody," you will end up increasing your rates of the most serious sins, which are those that harm somebody other than oneself. Since it is the Christmas season, I am willing to attempt to broker peace among all parties. Under this compromise, Mr. Bolton would enter Saintland and enroll at Progress High School for a single term. In exchange, all parties that wish to prosecute him for whatever reason would agree to drop all charges. I am hopeful that my offer will be given consideration by all parties involved in this ugly situation.

As you are also undoubtedly aware, Feministvs Sanctvsterra, a notorious terrorist organization, is competing in the current World Cup. I wish to, once again, call upon the government of the Free Republics to stop harboring terrorists. Today, Feministvs Sanctvsterra opened their World Cup qualifying campaign against Evraim, one of the most pathetic nations ever to compete in international soccer. I don't believe they have ever scored even a single goal. Feministvs Sanctvsterra shut down their inept attack and managed just a single goal. Their striker scored the goal, I think, but its irrelevant. What is relevant is that Feministvs Sanctvsterra has no business competing in an international sports event. They are terrorists who belong in prison. These "ladies," and I am using that term very loosely, are responsible for numerous acts of terror throughout the multiverse. Just ask the Quebecois, if they aren't throwing a fit about the NSCF officiating at this particular moment. I call upon Cassadaigua and the Equestrian States to remove Feministvs Sanctvsterra from their so-called World Cup immediately and extradite the terrorists to Saintland to stand trial.

On a happier note, the National Basketball Team has now made it to the semi-finals of the IBC and I can now report that they have just defeated the Andromeda Islands by a score of 92 to 91 in the first game of the IBC semis. With Cassadaigua picking up an 84 to 58 victory over Qazox, this can only be a sign that God wants Ashley Kinson or whatever her name is to be shut down by your Olympic Gold Medalists in the Finals of the IBC. It makes me so happy to see that justice will soon be done in the IBC. Cassadaigua is going down and they're going down against the nation that they stole the World Cup from. They're going to get exactly what they've had coming to them for so long, namely yet another defeat in the IBC Finals. It is the Will of God.

However, not everything is as it should be in international basketball. A wicked organization calling themselves the World Basketball Rankings Organization (WBRO) has announced that our Kingdom's National Team will be ranked either 4th or 5th after this IBC, no matter what we do. This is simply outrageous. Why are those top 3 teams guaranteed the top 3 spots in the rankings? If Prince Ioannes's team wins the IBC, they are, beyond all doubt, the best basketball team in the multiverse. How could anybody say that the reigning IBC champions and reigning Olympic Gold Medalists weren't the best basketball team in the multiverse? That is just a ridiculous claim, about as ridiculous as the claim by some rather foolish Infernus-bound individuals that there is no God.

Within the next few hours, we should find out the identity of the next World Bowl host. One can only hope that the likes of Cassadaigua and the Equestrian States, not to mention others of their ilk, are not successful with their efforts to defeat our World Bowl bid, which uses the Holy Casaran Format, and reopen the signups. If our bid is chosen, then we will have plenty of world-class gridiron in our Kingdom following the holiday season. This will be much more exciting gridiron than that of past World Bowls, since we have adopted new rules which are designed to open up the game for offenses and stop dirty defensive play, such as that which the Talking Horses are known for. This should, hopefully, lead to fewer cheap shots and more of an emphasis on skillful play. I am Sister Maria Polus and I thank you for watching.

by **San Jose Guayabal** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 5:28 pm

<-- Previous --> Next

Chapter one, part two.

Mario and his coworkers stopped before entering the hall, to eat more food, all approached the vendor and John, a worker told the saleswoman, "Give me twenty-four bean and cheese pupusas with six chocolates Please," the woman said with a smile "pupusas are at a time" and everyone started eating as they talked about the news of the sports newspaper which said in large letters" San Miguel chosen to host a match of SJG during 67 WC Qualifiers "to what people said "f*ck, it was time to remember the east" the saleswoman said Sure, they only think about f*cking the West","you're right, only refer those fasistas¹, miserable piece of sh*t" said one worker while another opined," It seems that before the FA was commanded by Gregoryisgodistan² ". after these reviews appeared after Will, the mayor of the town of San Miguel and told workers "After you eat, hurry because in a few minutes we will delegate tasks, but the motto remains, it will be "De Choto³" workers finished eating and followed the mayor to attend the meeting.

At the meeting the boring protocol was followed, then verify attendance of all workers, and then wake up the worker asleep he had shopworn the previous day, after that, the mayor began to give his speech and display requirements for the carnival, eg "Safety, holidays, choose the carnival queen, buy drinks, hire international artists, blah blah blah". then asked all 20 people would form groups and write down ideas, that was the funniest moment of the encounter, as people offered from mariachis to "immoral acts" like calling prostitutes, the "smart" employee who provided the idea was discounted 20% of his salary, but left most bizarre ideas, such as inviting the "Lord All- Mighty Gregory" and execute him it on the public square to commemorate the Guayabalense supremacy over his "poor country" , then people started dancing the official song of the Carnival and then moved to small towns and hamlets to compose the "carnival committees" and formalize the festivities, although people was already in hangover by eating beers and then you cause shootings to test their weapons and display as "thugs" , Mario went to their community and spoke with his daughter to talk as they were preparing for her dress and carnival float, Luisa said she needed get sponsors to avoid incurring excessive costs, Mario said "Yes my beautiful daughter, do not worry, I'll find a sponsor, you'll participate"

After talking with her daughter, the mother came to talk to Mario and said "How you been love"Mario replied "Okay, beautiful love" Mario then retired and went to talk with his friends while watching drunks fighting saying "come here asshole, I'll smash your head" and another drunk, shouting insults against him "that's what happens you f**king moron, you have no courage to come, come here assh*le" and the first drunk approached aggressively and released the first punch on another drunk, then this saw a beer bottle made of glass, broke it against the floor and used it as a blunt weapon, slamming into the stomach of the first drunk who passed out and later died at the fury of a crowd that supported the another drunk, Mario was where his friends to watch a game of "C.D Águila against Alianza F.C" a game that generates a lot of curiosity, it literally is a game of "Little boy San Miguel against Daddy Alianza" Mario decided to go to the stadium with his friends, taking advantage of which stood a couple of streets there were fast as already missing just 20 minutes to start the game, they wanted to see the cherry on the cake carnival, CD Águila giving a surprise against Alianza FC, which any resident of San Miguel will pay to view.

Words meaning
¹Fasista: Nickname to the people from Santa Ana
²Gregoryisgodistan: A slang used to say "Evil"
³De Choto: is a Guayabalense spanish slang who Means "free access"

by **Super-Llamaland** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 5:30 pm

(Notable Note: Consider this part of Xavier Platona in the World XI challenge.)

Brenecia 3–0 Alta Belleza
Sicoutimont 0–1 Super-Llamaland
Swansea City 1–3 HorusLand
Kitsunia-Deese 4–7 Valanora

10:42 AM
Stade St-Pierre
Lac-Drouin, Sicoutiont

Xavier hated the inflammatory posts, tweets, and comments. Everywhere he browsed, a horde of idiots armed with laptops and rudimentary knowledge of spelling seemed to follow. On his LlamaNet account (XPlatona30_F.C.Vargas), on his Twitter, everywhere he even posted, unless he posted under a fake account like "Armchair-logic-26" or "Aardvark-time-11", and then a few computer geeks usually discovered that they were Platona's puppet accounts and brought it to light.

Xavier turned on his Ouranos phone with a flip and a click, inputting a simple, three-digit pass code to unlock the phone. He tapped on the LlamaNet app. The flickering blue LlamaNet logo opened up.

WELCOME, XPLATONA30! YOU HAVE 140 NEW COMMENTS ON YOUR POSTS! <<click to view>>

Xavier sighed and tapped on "click to view". Of course, there was the usual.

NBrasil_Paraguay18 wrote: "Haha what a sissy LOL."
TTFN19_vargas_suburbia wrote: "Hey Xavier, how's the ankle?"
SuperDuperFan3_AppleValleyFanClubFC wrote: "When we needed u, your ankle "flared up". *rolls eyes*"
XavierPlatona,WimpExtrordinaire_Awesomeness wrote: "Oh, Ill never live that down...(dramatically) my ankle hurts! TROLOLOL"
Carsons_Baconisgreat wrote: "hehehe...you're funny"

Xavier, as always, bootlessly attempted a defense:

<<MESSAGE POSTED!>>

XPlatona30_F.C.Vargas: "Bro...duplicity isn't cool these days. Grammar is. -Xavier

And then he kept scrolling. A post intrigued him. He paused, let inertial scrolling stop, and then found the post.

AMorgan_Fans.of.soccer.Tigers: "Xavier, really hoping you have a great tournament

:):) meet me @ stadium, Section 101, Row J, Seat 18 @ 10:00 PM please!"

Logic said no, it was insane.
But Xavier felt like it.
Then again...
But still...
And plus...
However...

Xavier hit the REPLY button.

XPlatona30_Vargas.F.C.: That would be great! -Xavier

He stared at it blankly. He could always back out. It was the internet. Nothing on the internet was permanent. Right?

Xavier left for practice.

THE GAME: 6:30 PM kickoff

It began innocently. Kickoff for the opponents. Pass there, pass back, pass to the left, pass to Xavier's man. Follow the dribbler, he's going to pass again, tackle, take the ball. Pass to Duncan up ahead. Jog behind Duncan, watch him try a cross. Now it's back on defense, Sicoutimont's de Terre with it. He's dribbling, pass back, steal the ball, run away. Pass back to Chapman (is he still mad?). Get the pass from May (is he taking your job?). Dribble and cross to Duncan (will you ever beat him?).

The hectic, frantic, paranoid glory of it all!

But Xavier kept playing, the first half's excitement dragging on...and on...and on...and on...and on, until it was nothing more but action-packed tedium. Of course, in a battle of pretty offensive teams, it was zip-zip after the forty-five AND a minute of stoppage.

Nobody had the edge. It was an important game, and still tied up.

What was going to happen?

The answer: The second half. A frustrated Platona, already annoyed by the barrage of annoying comments and a subpar first half in which he made a few too many bad passes, took five shots, two on goal, in the first thirty minutes. None went in. Platona was subbed out to boos from the road crowd.

"Good work," said Jared Mullin, jogging onto the pitch as Platona left. The manager, Ferguson, was silent as Xavier passed him. He sat down heavily and decided to leave the pitch. Without asking Ferguson.

He texted the mysterious fan:

Nothing on internet lasts forever. Same with our meeting. Can we bump it up to in ten mins.? -Xavier

The fan replied immediately:

Yeah sure. Thnx! hmm... -Andrea

So he left.

About 8:15 PM

Xavier found the seat Andrea was supposed to be in. It was empty except for a small iPhone. Xavier looked around. Nobody was interested in him. Andrea was nowhere to be seen, although Xavier couldn't know what this blind meeting would bring. Or what Andrea looked like, which was annoying, because he couldn't look for her.

He sat down, picking up the phone so he didn't leave butt marks on it. The phone, to his surprise, turned on.

"Hello," said the phone electronically. Xavier dropped the phone on the ground. The phone made a very annoyed sound.

"This is a prank," Xavier, who had just realized that the phone was talking, mumbled.

"No, it isn't," said the phone. It's voice didn't seem as electronic anymore.

"You're 'Andrea'? Seriously? Look, I'm getting into trouble right now for not being at the sidelines."

"Why?"

"Wait...what are you?"

"No. Freaking. Clue."

"Very funny. Look, can I just take you home and we'll talk there?"

"...sure. Turn me off or something."

"Will you...turn back on?"

"Andrea" sounded annoyed. "Yes, if you hit a wonderful invention called the power button. Toggling smoothly from on to off, it..."

"Sure, yeah, okay. This is weird."

"Weird's better than 'Oh, deary me, it's a talking phone, must be a student prank. Kids these days.'"

"I'm rolling my eyes right now, in case you can't tell."

"Oh, I can see and hear fine."

"Uh huh. You're a phone."

"Sure looks like it. You're a person. Oh, deary me, it's a talking monkey, must be a prank. Nokias these days."

"Phone humor?"

"Yup. Get back there before Ferguson starts biting your head off."

Xavier, running down the aisle stairs, Andrea in his pocket, contemplated the past thirty minutes. Weird posts online didn't seem as concerning anymore.

STATS!
(Duncan scored in 82', Crosby assist. No cards.)

Richards: 8 SOG, no goals, 100% save percentage, 0 GPG, 1 shutout

Duncan: One goal, no assists, 2 points
Crosby: No goals, one assist, 1 point

by **Gregoryisgodistan** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 5:34 pm

From the Desk of Lord Almighty Gregory

To: Impostor Claiming to be Sister Maria Polus
CC: Kyle Bolton, All Governments involved in WC67

Dear Woman Claiming to be Sister Maria Polus,

First, let me say I am well aware you are an impostor and the real Sister Maria Polus is dead. I do not appreciate deception. I call upon you to admit Sister Polus is dead, having been punished for attempting to assassinate me, and reveal your real identity. However, whoever you are, I trust you are the current headmaster of Progress High School, and possess the full powers of that job, seeing as the real Sister Polus obviously does not. Therefore, this deception is besides the point of why I am writing.

Let me now turn to the matter at hand. I have been notified that you have offered to enroll Kyle Bolton in Progress High School, in exchange for all nations pressing charges against him dropping said charges. Although ordinarily the crime of attempted assassination calls for execution under Gregoryisgodistani law, I believe that enrolling in your horrible, devilish, wicked, malevolent, torturous school would be a fate worse than death for Mr. Bolton. As a result, I am willing to accept your offer, conditional on nations involved in his rape case agreeing as well.

I strongly urge you not to take it easy on Mr. Bolton because he is a celebrity. Use the same disciplinary methods you use on other students. (OOC: None of the following punishments should be presumed accurate IC-ly. They are intended as propaganda.) Waterboard him for looking at a girl, force him to write a 50-page essay with his own blood for kissing a girl, electrocute him 1,000 times if he doesn't pray in your so-called churches 18 times a day, draw and quarter him for profanity, whip him 5,000 times for blasphemy, and apply all of the above punishments 10,000 times if he has sex.

Yes, having to attend that horrible school of yours will truly be a fate worse than death for Mr. Bolton. I look forward to hearing about the horrible punishments he will suffer at your hands. Additionally, Actor DJ248SJAHD has already agreed to play Mr. Bolton in a spin-off of the hit TV Show "Real Husbands of Saintland" if Kyle winds up enrolling in your school. This show would be called "Real Students of Progress High School" and would show the awful, hideous, torturous techniques of alleged "education" your school/torture chamber uses. I am sure it will be a smash hit, meaning all Gregoryisgodistanis will benefit from Mr. Bolton enrolling in your school rather than being executed.

Once again, I accept your offer conditional on the acceptance of all involved parties. However, if Mr. Bolton does not accept the terms of the deal, I am still willing to agree to it if he is kidnapped and held captive at Progress High School. Should he escape or be released prior to the scheduled date, I would immediately demand his extradition and execution. That being said, it is my hope that Mr. Bolton goes willingly.

Thank you, and Happy Gregmas.

Sincerely,

Lord Almighty Gregory

by **Vaugania** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 5:37 pm

OOC: I was planning on officially kicking off the Patrick Kerr series today, but I decided to comment on something else instead.

Really, Guys? Another One?
by Johannes Lang

Of all the disturbing trends throughout the multiverse, there is one that has disturbed me the most. Rape. It seems to be happening quite a bit these days, with those Dagan women and now the captain of the Free Republics, Kyle Bolton. My concern is, is it really that hard to not rape people? I get the whole provocative clothing thing, but shouldn't there be something in the back of your mind telling you that what you are doing is wrong? If somebody says, "No," or you load them up with drugs, proceeding to have intercourse with them is a bad idea. The issue I'm seeing is that it is way to easy to get out of these accusations and move on with your life. I'm a firm believer that Ashley Stokes and Meghan Kinson raped that poor young man despite what the courts said. The laws are just too messed up in Cassadaigua for them to have been prosecuted properly.

As far as Kyle Bolton, there is no doubt that the Free Republics government and Rule Theriault will be trying to clear all of this up via legitimate or illegitimate methods, but rest assured Bolton will be cleared of all charges somehow. While I do think what the New Catholics are trying to do is great with the reconciliation and that friendly between the Golden Eagles and the Free Republics was a good move, I don't know how I can or how we as Catholics can reconcile with a team that is fielding rapists during their games.

Nations like Cassadaigua and the Free Republics need to take our lead on heinous crimes like rape and adopt our method of punishment. If someone on the national team was accused of rape and there was decent evidence, that being enough to press charges, they would be off of the team indefinitely. They likely wouldn't even be able to come back until their trial was over and that's only if they were found not guilty. If found guilty, they would be treated like everyone else who commits that crime. At least 12 years in prison, with a good chance for even more all of the way up to 25. Or better yet, go the Gregoryisgodistan route and execute them when it gets really bad (not that any of these athletes need to be executed just yet). All of these other countries are trying to skirt their own rules for their own benefit. It is absolutely despicable, deplorable, and whatever other adjective that starts with "de" would apply here. The legal systems are obviously rigged which is something nobody on any jury in Vaugania would even think of doing. If you intentionally let someone free for a crime they are accused of and you know that they are guilty you are just as awful as them and God will judge you justly.

Another disturbing matter that is part of this rape discussion, is that every single one has turned into an international crisis. The Stokes and Kinson case was plastered across magazines' and newspapers' front pages all the way across the multiverse and back. It was this big deal and anybody who's anybody knew all of the details. The Free Republics have gone ahead and turned the Bolton case into an international incident. As of when I wrote this article, Kyle Bolton was a free man pending charges. Did Rule Theriault pay his bail? Of course not! Some sort of special forces squadron, MANATEEs, or whatever they call them in the FR, broke into the jail and busted him out no doubt causing havoc along the way. There is no doubt that The Sarian will have something to say about this and the WCC should ban Kyle Bolton from further competition during these qualifiers. The rapist belongs in jail, not on a soccer pitch. I realize that you are innocent until proven guilty, but breaking someone out of prison rather than making bail is just as clear of a confession to me as one made in a courtroom with cameras and a jury.

In conclusion, people really need to quit it with the whole rape thing. "No" means "no" kids, there aren't any "ifs", "ands", or "buts" about it. If you don't to end up like Mr. Bolton or those Dagans, keep it in your pants.

As one last side-note, I would like to say something to Sister Maria Polus of Saintland. Just because somebody does something that peeves you a bit, it doesn't mean that they're Satan. And please cancel your vlog. It's awful.

by **Thatius** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 5:56 pm

One week prior to the Qualifying Opener against Milchama..

Frost.

Every morning started with the same routine for John Karahalios. At least in the wintertime in Kristiansond. First he would turn on the engine to heat up his 2011 Tyrias Firebird and turn his defrosters on full blast. Meanwhile as his engine warmed up, John would scrape the solidly-packed ice off the front and back windshields of his car. This cold winter had brought the worst winter weather Kristiansond had ever seen. Then again, Kristiansond had only existed for the pat five years, recently built as the athletics metropolis of Thatius, so this harsh winter had no true measuring stick. This would be the final practice before flying out to Milchama for the opening game of World Cup Qualifying.

This practice would be the worst one the team has seen yet. Karahalios, while only a one-year veteran of the national team, knew what was coming. John was used to the cold, even though he came from the warm Djonos Islands to the south. He grew up playing soccer on the beach, shirtless. Now these days he had to wear double layers and gloves it was that cold. The cold wasn't going to kill him today. It would be Coach Djantschenko's famous final practice that would be the end of him. Every year before the World Cup Qualifying, he would make his team do something outrageous that took a lot of athleticism but also built teamwork. Last year they had to climb the mountain that overlooks the city, with a twist that they would have nothing but each other and the clothes on their back that they brought to practice. This year, John knew that the coaching staff would top that. But what?

Leaving the athlete's apartments downtown, John headed for the national training facility, just ten minutes away. He chose to take his own car rather than the tube that ran straight there. He preferred to have music going and the alone time before the chaos. Traffic was backed up as usual on the main highway leading to every facility. After all at 5am, most athletes were headed to practice anyways. And it wasn't just the athletes, but the coaches, trainers, staff, and even businessmen and women who were the backbone of the city. John was just another commuter.

After twenty minutes of traffic and few nifty moves to get around the slowed-down cars, John arrived at the facility. He was the first one there, as usual. Coach Djantschenko always commended him on his effort to be early to practice and motivate the team. In fact, he had eyed John to replace star midfielder Jason Petković as team captain come a few years when Jason would retire from professional soccer. John was, in fact, the second leader on the team, even surpassing famed goalie Novak Prakusya, who has been on the national team almost from the beginning of Thatius' time in the World Cup Qualifications. But these two players were outstanding, given their age. John was young and an upcoming player on the team. He played right midfielder alongside Jason and Tomislav Novaković. Together the three of them formed the backbone of perhaps Thatius' best team ever. They had the talent and experience, so it all boiled down to putting all of that on the field and execution.

John warmed up by running twenty laps in the indoor track, which had a temperature fifty degrees higher than outside, not including the wind chill. Meanwhile, the rest of the team started to show up. He was soon joined by newcomers Knox Mihaljović, Hastings Djerdević, and Luke Krychowski, all of whom were invited to the national team as of this year and were trying to prove their worth. Karahalios had a year on them, alongside Michael Kovács, Cooper Branham, and Clark Andrijašević. They showed up later than the "freshman", mainly because they knew they could get away with it, for now. By the time it was six-thiry, the entire team was assembled and ready for their final practice.

Coach Djantschenko, a fairly tall and skinny individual, marched into the main soccer indoor soccer practice field and blew his whistle. Silently following him were the assistant coaches, Davis Eysserić and Mike Volyenko. Both were the best at their positions and would be valuable assets in the upcoming qualifying cycle. The anxious look on the coaching staff's faces both concerned and confused John.

"Gentlemen, practice is cancelled. Go home. Minutes ago we just received word that there has been a terrorist attack in Frederikstadt."

All twenty-two players assembled burst out with confusions, most confused or in shock. Some of the guys were from Frederikstadt and had family living there. Even so, it was the capital of Thatius, the biggest and most prominent city in the nation.

"What happened?!" exclaimed Derek Christensen. His entire family lived in downtown Frederikstadt right in the corporate district.

"There's been a bombing," started Djantschenko. "The Senate has been hit, although I'm not sure if anyone was in there, it was too early. But more bombs repeatedly went off in the city and we're not sure what's going on in the capital. But that's not everything"

Everyone held their breath.

"Frederikstadt wasn't the only city hit. The President's winter home in Bronzegate was hit. We're not sure what the status is there. Also, other prominent senators from the High Council were hit. We just got word that Arandjelovac, Lozovik, New Melbourne, and Starograd all had incidents. We urge everyone to head home right now, we have buses that will take you straight to your living quarters as we advise to not take public transportation. Unfortunately that means we are canceling our final practice. I know many of you are seriously disappointed, as was I. But just stay in touch with me and your trainers for the next few days before we depart for Milchama for the first stage of the World Cup."

Then chaos descended upon the national soccer facility. John and his friends packed up their bags and headed straight for the exits, along with everyone else.

"JOHN!" yelled Knox Mihaljović. "Can I ride with you back home?"

John beckoned him over and the two of them sped off back into the inner city. Thankfully nothing was on fire and they heard no explosions. But there was chaos everywhere from the looks of it. Traffic piled back just as bad going back into the city. It seems everyone freaked out at just the same time.

"Who set off those bombs, do you think?" asked Knox.

"I couldn't tell you. My best guess was it's internal, from civilian militant group. We don't have any enemies outside our border, unless you count the nation of Slovekistan, one of our colonies. But they are content with our rule, just as New Serbia, Neuseeland, and Kos are."

"That would be my best guess too," agreed Knox. At 6'6, he was the tallest player on the team. He could barely fit into John's car. "Maybe it was the separatist movement again. You know they are becoming increasingly popular these days. There's even that rumor that members of the High Council are on their side, at least the senators from the eastern islands."

"That's ridiculous, why would they bomb Arandjelovac, then?" asked John. "That's the de facto capital of the East."

Knox shrugged. John pulled into the underground parking and leapt out of the car, forgetting his soccer bag and gear. He was more interested in the news. Knox ran after him, eager to hear what was going on as well. They both lived in the same athlete's apartment complex, so it made no matter whose room they went to. John's was on the tenth floor, so they went to his. As soon as he opened the door, John flipped on the television to the news.

"BREAKING" flashed in yellow upon the screen. The news anchor, read off the teleprompter with an astonished face.

"The latest from Frederikstadt," she announced. "The official count of deaths is not clear, but we are estimating at least one thousand people were killed in collapsing of buildings and the blast from the bombs in downtown Frederikstadt. These bombs were located in the Senate Building as well as various senator's offices, the High Court, the President's Palace, and the National Theater. We have no reports on if any senators or prominent government officials were killed, but we can only guess. There still remains to be no news from Bronzegate, as all communication has been cut off. We do not know of President Marko Irosković's status."

"Wow, this is something." whispered John.

"In an official move by the Department of State and Security, the borders of Thatius' main two islands has been cut off. No plane, ship, or car will be allowed to enter or leave. The other seven islands have mandated immediate curfew at this hour and have quadrupled security at high risk places. Interestingly enough, we have not seen any bombs go off in the Djonos Islands, Novano, Dodekanese, or the Northern Arael Islands. The colonies have also been placed under immediate protection and have had no reported incidents. We will continue to post you further on the situation in Frederikstadt, but let's head to Arandjelovac, where we have Michael Yassnov reporting live."

"What does this mean for the World Cup Qualifying?" asked Knox. "No one will want to play in Thatius if there's terrorists bombing the capital. That's where we play our main matches!

"I don't know, man. I truly don't know."

To be continued...

by **Qazox** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 6:03 pm

"What the hell happened out there? Catholican Catholica just made us look like chumps out there!" Lewis yelled at Helen and Reggie. "I thought you had those bugs fixed."

"It's not a bug, Lewis. It's the individual photonic helix-matrices of each player interacting with the pseudo-cerebrospinal system at random rates, as predictec. Yes having all 25 players have that occur during the game was a bit unexpected though." Reggie explained.

"The QFA members accepted my excuse of opening night jitters for the team, but you better get the bugs and any other problems fixed before the Audioslavia game. These next 4 games are against teams we should be able to beat, synthetic humans or not." Lewis said, before storming out.

"Damn him. If it wasn't for his financial backing, I would never want to associate with such a unlikable man." Helen replied, as she and Reggie headed to the shop to check on the team. "I know this can work, but to waste them on football? Ugh. "

"But think of the positives, Helen. We have proved that synthetic beings are virtually indistinguishable from flesh and blood ones." Reggie answered. "Just have to put up with Lewis' bullshit for the next year, then he releases the patents to us."

by **Jeruselem** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 6:23 pm

At Dazza Dallas Stadium, Princess Amy and Lady Marge after Jeruselem beat Legalese 1-0

Amy: Hello, this is Princess Amy for Naked News Jeruselem at Dazza Dallas Stadium. Jeruselem took on Legalese who are ranked 31st and we beat them! I'm with Lady Marge our winning goal scorer today
Lady: So happy to be here
Amy: Before we discuss Group 1, we have Group 8 with Jeru FC in it
Lady: Ah the boys, I'm not into boys
Amy: You're not into males fullstop
Lady: Um, oh yes

Amy: Jeru FC beat Karditan 3-2 which I call an upset, a great game from our boys
Lady: Wow, that was an upset
Amy: There was nearly an upset where Darmen drew with lowly ranked Vaugania 2-2
Lady: Darmen were lucky, considering the rank of Vaugania
Amy: Swyftlandre and Antoletia won their games as expected
Lady: Good stuff from Jeru FC so far

Amy: Now for Group 1, where Jeruselem are in. We beat Legalese 1-0 in game where we were expected to lose
Lady: The girls and boys played well today
Amy: It was a hard game, we didn't get much shots on goal
Lady: Yes Amy, Legalese were hard to break down
Amy: You scored the winning goal, how does that feel
Lady: Didn't think much of it at the time

Amy: Hopefully we keep on winning these home games
Lady: It's 3 points ... however you get it. You were a bit flat today
Amy: Well, recovering from a hangover
Lady: That was two days ago
Amy: Yes well, I had far too much to drink
Lady: She was every entertaining

Amy: I don't remember anyway
Lady: I'm sure you don't
Amy: Welsh Cowboy trashed Old Rhelia 7-1, Osarius beat Shadowbourne 2-0 and Kidlantis got their first win with a 2-0 win over Hicana
Lady: Wow, 7-1 ... that's a win
Amy: Old Rhelia aren't exactly highly ranked though
Lady: I guess they had to learn somehow

Amy: Stop pinching me
Lady: Sorry, but you aren't wearing anything
Amy: A bit of self control helps
Lady: Sorry, instinct
Amy: So, you've mad an impact in your first game
Lady: I don't want to let people down ya know, especially the coach

Amy: Who's your hero
Lady: Well, there's a few people I look up to
Amy: Anyone in particular
Lady: Dazza Dallas, a woman who helped us women stand up and be counted
Amy: There's a definitely a bit over in me
Lady: I don't know how she coped with all you girls

Amy: Why is that?
Lady: Mum says raising girls is hard
Amy: Most of my part of family is girls
Lady: I guess you're used to it
Amy: Anyway, we have to go. See you all later in the next game.
Lady: Bye everyone!

by **Julain (Ancient)** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 6:37 pm

Away Dressing Room,Swyftlandre

Swyftlandre 4--1 Julain

Understandbly,every single player on Julain's team were left shattered,and each had to voice their own opinion

"That was horrible"

"Atrocious"

"Demoralizing"

"Terrible"

"Worst. Game. Ever."

"Hey,you should be used to that. Your club is in Division 2"

"I WAS OPEN"

"No you weren't"

"Would only make it 4-2"

"Admit it,we were crap"

"No,the referee was"

"SHUT UP"

"If only he didn't make that foul"

"After that,the floodgates opened. All your fault"

"That wasn't intentional."

"Yes it was"

"No it wasn't"

"Yes it was"

"No it wasn't"

"Yes,it certainly was."

"WOULD YOU ALL SHUT UP!"

Everyone stopped. And turned. Jean Arro had broken the childish conversations with a simple message. No one has ever heard him speak in the dressing room before,let alone shout. He was mad. Maybe it was that Division 2 comment earlier. Whatever it was,he was pissed off. He opened the door,left the dressing room and slammed it shut behind him. No one bothered to follow. Not even manager Paul Traversen. Not even Arro's best buddy Guillermo Ternalbao. No one. Finally,Adam Nazir's voice piped up from the back:

"What do we do now?"

"I dunno. But I was quite open on that last play."

"No,you were offside."

And the shenanigans continue...

GAME SUMMARY

Swyftlandre 4--1 Julain (1-1 HT)(Black for Goals,Blue for Cautions,Red for Sending Offs,Light Green for Minor Injury,Dark Green for Major Injury.Subs indicated with [SUB])

Swyftlandre--4
???,17 min
???,55 min (FK)
???,58 min
???,64 min

Julain--1
Jean Arro,29 min
Max McGuire,55 min
[SUB] Alex de Ryde on for Max McGuire,61 min
[SUB] Adrian Garcia on for Torranto Norancorze, 72 min
[SUB] Barry Bahacelos on for Jean Arro, 72 min

by **Antoletia** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 6:44 pm

"Yeah!"

"Big win on the road."

"I'd say. 3 Goals to 1."

"Great start by Constantinescu. Made it 1-0."

"Yeah and then Gabriel Mohammed with the overhead kick."

"That was so beautiful."

"Yeah 2-0 before 19th Century Beards realized it was a football game."

"Yeah. Then it was much closer."

"I was truly worried for a few minutes that they were gonna score two goals after their first one went in."

"But the defense stood up for the rest of the game."

"Yep."

"Then it was all over when Von Leeweonheouck scored his own goal."

"A rifle from 30 yards."

"Another brilliant goal."

"Well we are always good at offense."

"As is tradition."

"Good win on the road. Keep it up and we will do good."

"Yep."

by **Taeshan** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 6:54 pm

Knights Open With Win

Let's be honest, their is not a lot of ways to describe a 1-0 victory. To be fair i could open this up with interesting factoids about random information having little to do with the final score of the game. I could tell you how green the grass was, how blue the sky was or how sunny the sun was. But no i will not force you to re read, and re read the information that you have read millions of times before. We all know how the game went. Like countless others including Taeshan it was a 1-0 victory for the Purple Knights. It is the tradition of soccer in Taeshan and this game like many before it was no different. Honestly the Knights play a beautiful game, but it can be rather boring to watch them pass the ball around for 2 hours every other week or so.

It also was a rather un interesting single goal that the Purple Knights got their win on. Like many goals before it, the goal hinged on a single player on the Knights team, Ender Wiggin. As is also traditional in Taeshani soccer 1 player is mostly the whole offense, first Zeke, then Ying Uing, then Newier, then Juniper and now Ender Wiggin. Sure he doesnt score every game but he is the biggest singular impact on every game. Like most other games the Taeshani captain proved to be the man of the match with the single most impacting play of the match. Wiggin found a streaking Tyler Pantoum on the wing who curled in a cross to a waiting Brian Ibrahim. The Canalave man plummed the ball over the Sovan keeper and won the Knights the game. 3 points and the spoils to the victors.

by **West Angola** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 7:14 pm

Part One

Anna's response had been as quick as it could be, given the chaos that still pervaded the country following the crisis; infected citizens had wandered all over the country after turning, and thus had found themselves scattered and lost after being cured. Members of the government had not been spared this, so it had taken nearly two days to locate and gather enough of Parliament to declare a quorum and approve the necessary funding and troops to put down the rebellion. Organization for a counterattack had been made all the more difficult by the discovery that General William Forrest, West Angola's senior military leader, had succumbed to the brutal combination of cancer and paralysis that had plagued him since the Vortropolan War, leaving the Army without a supreme commander. In total, it had taken another week beyond the miracle cure to put the Army back in fighting shape and assemble the units for deployment to the north, but at long last Operation Northwind was ready to roll. Cabindan insurgents had seized complete control of the small northern province, driving out the surprised and confused West Angolan military loyalists, whose numbers were already depleted due to the infection. With all the chaos going on in Namibe, especially during the furious battle within the Royal Palace, word of the uprising had not reached the government, allowing the rebels (who had managed to escape the worst of the infection) the time they needed to secure the region and rally more soldiers to their cause.

By the time General Michael Oche, the new commander of the Northern Defense Zone, had taken command and begun moving his soldiers towards small corridor of foreign territory that separated Cabinda from the rest of West Angola, imbedded agents had reported that the rebels were "firmly entrenched and ready to repel an invasion, possessing both the equipment and the will to do so" and had rallied "approximately 55% of the population to support them, either directly or indirectly." Despite being a relative non-issue prior to the assassination of King Sien eight years previous, Cabindan independence had been brought to the forefront of the national mindset by The Plan. Needing a motivation aside from hatred of the Eurasphere to assign to the assassins, Daniel Unist had proposed to Kevin Garrett and the other surviving architects of The Plan that they use Cabindan independence. The others had agreed, reasoning that as long as they were careful they could easily avoid actually igniting a Cabindan secession campaign. However, they had underestimated the tenacity of the secessionists, who had labored tirelessly to transform the image of the assassins from madmen with rocket launchers into martyrs desperate to end a century of oppression. The secessionists had seized their chance when the dead rose, blaming Namibe for the plague and launching a full-scale rebellion against West Angolan rule.

The "liberation" of Cabinda had been hastily planned, and Army morale was still rather low as many had barely had time to see their families before being ordered to deploy for the offensive. The rebels, on the other hand, had been planning the defense of the province's southern border for years and were eager to defend their homes against what they saw as an attempt to reestablish an oppressive hegemony over them. Further complicating Oche's planning was that he would be fighting on foreign territory until he managed to push into Cabinda itself, and while he had received permission to do so, he would be unable to employ any kind of high explosive weapon, and he had only a fifteen-kilometer wide area in which to operate. Oche had been told in no uncertain terms that any movement by his forces outside of the allowed zone would be construed as an act of war, and that he would be executed as a war criminal following his subsequent capture. With these things constraining him, Oche had opted for a direct frontal assault, hoping to overwhelm the rebels before they had time to prepare secondary lines of defense, therefore flanking and forcing the remainder to surrender quickly.

Oche's plan was hopelessly naive, and reflected the folly of allowing the military command structure to rely so heavily on Forrest for strategic planning over the years. West Angola was about to reap the rewards of this course of action, as not only were their senior generals hopelessly out of practice at planning large-scale operations, their subordinates were spoiled by using orders dictated by Forrest. The wily genius' operations usually went largely according to plan, and as such those who served under him had next to no practice in improvising when their operations went off book. West Angola was about to receive a lesson directly from Sun Tzu, and their soldiers would face Darwin's greatest test: adapt or die.

As in all other areas of West Angolan life, football had managed to pervade even the Cabindan struggle for independence. John Blevit, one of the midfielders for the national team and a key player for Cabinda's football team in the West Angolan Premier League, had drawn attention for publicly declaring that he was "100% for the freedom fighters" in an interview with the Namibe Chronicle and then fleeing to the province just an hour later. Eluding the Namibe police, who like the military were disorganized and demoralized in the aftermath of the zombie apocalypse, Belvit had resurfaced in Cabinda and urged his fellow "Cabindans" to join him in securing the independence of their "country." Blevit had unfortunately served as a strong rallying point for the rebellion, especially when photos were released of him in the uniform of a Colonel in the newly-minted Cabindan Army and departing to defend Cabinda's borders against the coming invasion from the south. Blevit had felt like a real hero when that picture was taken, more than he'd ever felt while with the national team, but now, hiding in a foxhole with thousands of his former countrymen heading straight towards him, and fully intending to end his life at that, he felt significantly less like a hero and much more like an idiot.

Oche's attack came like a charging elephant, and was stopped like an insect hitting a windshield. Crouched beneath the surface, Blevit heard the rumble of the approaching West Angolan tanks, and could picture the 65-ton behemoth as it advanced across the battlefield, crushing anything in its way beneath its heavy treads. Oche was relying heavily on these machines, modeled after the Israeli Merkava-Class Tanks, to serve as armored personnel carriers and as shock-and-awe weapons to spearhead the breakthrough. As he had been ordered and relayed to his men, Blevit held his fire until he heard the tank's engine stop to offload soldiers, then burst out of his foxhole, lined up his antitank weapon, and unloaded a round at the closest war machine. With a thundering explosion, the shaped charge penetrated the shell of the behemoth, setting off a chain reaction inside the crew compartment that robbed several nearby soldiers on both sides of their hearing for several minutes. The few West Angolan troops who had managed to escape the tank before it brewed up had been thrown clear of the blast, and many had suffered severe burns as a result. Up and down the line, similar stories were playing out as Cabindan insurgents blasted apart the teeth of Oche's assault.

The losses for West Angola were severe, much of their advance force had still been waiting to exit the tanks when they were destroyed, and died without even knowing what had happened. In assessing his opponents' resources, Oche had failed to anticipate the use of antitank weapons, a costly oversight that could have been avoided had he had more experience with logistical planning and realized that several of the weapons had been captured during the rebellion. As it was, however, the loss of so many of their fellows was catastrophic for the morale of the survivors, and they broke and ran, fleeing and running directly into the follow-up force advancing directly behind them. The Brigade Commander, General Lee Westwood, was completely confused by their arrival. The advance force was supposed to punch directly through the Cabindan lines, leaving little for them to do but mop up, not rout after only a few minutes. Unaccustomed to dealing with changes in the battle plan, Westwood panicked and ordered a complete withdrawal of all remaining forces, leaving the field completely to Cabinda. Under the terms of West Angola's Right-of-Passage Deal, the army was forbidden from staying the night in foreign territory, forcing them to march all the way back to the Zaire province.

Already demoralized from the unexpected defeat, the long march nearly caused a riot among the soldiers when they returned to Zaire and were met by General Oche. Retreating under a fusillade of MREs, Oche locked himself in his office and put out a frantic call for the Military Police. The MP's were able to calm down the crowd, but not without considerable difficulty, and it was after four in the morning when the last of the men made it into bed. After a long conference with General Westwood and two members of the advance force an his office, Oche was forced to make his after-action report to Namibe, and in every click of the computer key he heard the gavel coming down at his court martial hearing.

Elements of First Division engaged Cabindan insurgents at the border in Zones 13, 14, and 16 today. All three zones encountered insurgents wielding antitank rounds resulting in major vehicle losses in Zones 13 and 14The Zone 13 Advance Force was repelled with 72% losses totaling 800, and the Zone 14 Advance Force was halted following deployment. Zone 16 Advance Force achieved preliminary success against Cabindan defenses, but were forced to withdraw under orders from General Westwood. General Westwood's Secondary Force encountered remnants of Zone 13 Advance Force and ordered an immediate retreat from all three zones. Westwood insists he received reports indicating that Zone 16 had been repelled as well, but it is my opinion that General Westwood panicked under the pressure and ordered a premature withdrawal. Given how I have perceived the morale of the men, I can only conclude that they are very dissatisfied with their commanders, myself included. I take responsibility for the vehicle losses in Zones 13 and 14, as I failed to anticipate the use of antitank weapons, but responsibility for the premature retreat rests solely with General Westwood. I intend to submit myself for disciplinary action, and I recommend that Westwood be subjected to the same.
Respectfully,
General Michael Oche, Northern Defense Zone

by **Zwangzug** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 7:27 pm

(OOC to Crystal Ponies: thanks for keeping so up-to-date with your roster, sorry to make you retcon it, and before you ask, no, I don't have capacities made up yet.

)

"Greetings from the Imperial Arena in Crystopolis! I'm Shannon Bryant, and here with me is Abhinav Darzi."

"Hola, bonjour, and ni-hao to you. A few clouds here in Crystopolis, but things look very calm so far, with Zwangzug set to take on the--wait for it--Crystal Knights. I'm sure they'll be jumping all over the place. One hopes they don't crack under the pressure."

"Well, we sort of do. One-sidedly."

"Oh, come along, we've got the spirit of fair play to maintain! Here of all places."

"If we must."

"Well, let's get this game underway..."

"...So, a bit of a challenge there from Arrow, but Millar's palmed it away, no harm done."

"Absolutely, and you get the feeling Bruce is out for a bit of revenge here. Remember, it was the local side here, Crystopolis City, who defeated his Excelsior Slogda in the playoff round of the Champions’ Cup. So with the second leg of this draw being played in Craton, maybe there'll be a bit of comeuppance over the hundred-eighty minutes."

"In Craton?"

"Absolutely, that's his club's home city--oh. Well. Some idiot drawing up the media guide appears to have not specified the city, just going with the district instead. We'll print new ones."

"They just put down 'Slogda'?"

"The morons, yes. I'll send in an e-mail and have that fixed!"

"They're not morons, they're probably just Hapra fans who are so happy to be part of a winning district they forgot that Excelsior don't play in their city."

"Well that's an optimistic way to look at it."

"You're worried about the wrong question. You should be asking why the game's going to be in Craton."

"Because they have a great club whose fans deserve to see the national team at home, obviously. And revenge and all that."

"Really? Because I was thinking 'we're sick of playing all our games at the national-team stadium, but we still want to drag these Knights out to play in the middle of nowhere where our fans won't come to see them.'"

"And you accuse me of cynicism. Sometimes I worry about you, Shannon."

"The concern's appreciated, Abhinav..."

"...and that one of the few shots Zwangzug's gotten off, clearly the hosts even more defensive-minded than us."

"Indeed, but it's Amberlocks to take the goal kick, Arctic Lily will push it forward."

"These two players both based in Astograth after impressing the Baptism of Fire hosts last cycle. The Crystal Knights have a couple ties to Astograth, some of their players wearing kits made from the Barrengeka company."

"And which players would those be, Abhinav?"

"Er..."

"...And that'll bring us to halftime."

"Well, honestly, it's been about what we expected so far, wouldn't you say? They've brought a defensive game, we're getting shut out, but we'll see whether their endurance lasts."

"Absolutely, but this is also a team capable of surging in the second half, Zwangzug will have to be careful."

"Obviously, but I think our endurance will win out, given all the training at Wayr Stadium and the old facilities? Actually, given that, I'm kind of looking forward to Craton already, it'll be fun to take in a game there. Especially if the fans provide enough banners and instruments and stuff."

"It's not that high-altitude, Abhinav."

"Well forgive me for some optimism in my life, really."

"We'll have more halftime analysis, and by halftime analysis we mean 'pretending we can quantify all the defensive talent that's been on display,' soon. Don't go anywhere..."

"...Rose-Dauphine's been looking strong in this second half, I'd like to think she's a worthy successor to Chrowder, at least in terms of defense."

"Well, Scroves hadn't really been employing her in the center before, so we'll see whether she can handle those responsibilities."

"At the least, I wouldn't expect to see her push forward for goal any time soon."

"Absolutely not, I think we could be headed for a scoreless draw. And, yes, Armor's going to substitute onto the defense, give them some fresh energy in the back!"

"Oh dear. Not #21. I'm going to be so embarrassed if we get beat by #21."

"Are you feeling insecure, Abhinav?"

"Just a bit, Shannon."

"Ah, well. It's Rose Quartz who's on for Toastie, trying to shore up the back."

"She plays for Canterlot City, in the Equestrian States, one of the co-hosts of this upcoming tournament..."

"...and at this point I'd say it's too late for Zwangzug to come back into it."

"Who's being cynical now, Shannon?"

"I'm not cynical, it's just not the done thing, scoring this late. Too much excitement for an old announcer like me to take."

"You're not that old."

"You flatter me, Abhinav. And here we have Keane-Liuprand...up to Ruan...back to Woredann now...and Horkawer-Rippel...he'll shoot...and it's a goal! For Dennis Horkawer-Rippel, his first for the national team!"

"Late substitution paid off for Zwangzug, too."

"And you know what? Looking at the time left to run out, I get the feeling there's still enough time for Zwangzug to get careless and blow it. Funny how it feels so different, now that there's been a goal."

"That's the spirit, Shannon. Kind of."

by **Valanora** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 7:47 pm

The Blue Fox

Legend tells the tales of the legendary blue fox
The most clever and industrial of all of the forest kin
Its wits matched only by that of human kind
And its ability to overcome odds is that the likes of which only heroes could do
But where oh were did this magnificent beast come from?

From across the sea or over the mountain
No one truly knows where this legendary beast came to be
Yet what is known to all is the tales of its greatness
A crown jewel of the pantheon of champions
With an alter created to revere the greatness of the feats it did perform.

In the land of champions there is the most sacred of jewels
No elf knows quite what it looks like having never laid eyes upon it
Yet all know that exists and it is sought after by all in those lands
Be it bear, elf, eel, or eagle
Yet it was the blue fox that found it time and time again
Even being so playful as to let nature steal it back and hide it once more
For it loved the competition, the game that the chase for the jewel became.

Now though the Blue Fox has left for where it came
Or so the legends say
Will it return to chase the great jewel once more
Only time and the fates truly know that answer
Yet all will revere and welcome the magnificent creature should it return
As it was ever as majestic as it was clever.

by **Kalumba** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 7:56 pm

On The Lash With The Lads

Well if that old soak from the previous issue is to be believed then we should be celebrating like mad, we went to the all conquering giants of The Heroes of Larkwood and fought out a glorious one all draw. That result will prove to be pivotal in our qualification campaign, it is doubtful even the top sides in Group Ten could play with such passion and skill in the face of such adversity. No man could have finished as cooley Kabila did in the second minute.

No side will go there and display such dominance in lieu of the opponents overwhelming superiority. How will any other side muster 28 total shots, with 13 on target? Who else will limited such a world beating side as Larkwood to just a single effort? Who else could go to the home of these indomitable heroes and control 72% of the possession? With such form qualification is assured, and let us be honest if we could so control a game against such a gloriously talented side the surely a first World Cup victory is on the cards.

And yes, this is bloody sarcasm. That drunken old slag will say anything on the off chance it will get her an extra pint. Larkwood? A world class side? Don't make me laugh they were shite. But we were worse, humiliatingly so. We were one up with just a couple of minutes of played. Our young side gelled well enough first time out last time out (bit of a mouthful there, Ed) to finish third in a tricky group and should really be pushing for a first qualification. But instead we threw it all away.

I just wish that we could lay the blame at the door of a new manager, or coaching staff. Or just something that would avoid us having to say: we are crap. Despite the results last time out, I can't think of a single game in which we actually played well. Having seen what these lads do for Kahali Spears, why can't they do that for the national side?

Is it too much of a step up? Are the tactics wrong? Who bloody knows. What we do know is Larkwood beer is soft, and little better than warm piss. It's also overpriced, much like their red light district, and over-policed. Lord Almighty I cannot for the life of me remember the last time I was escorted by mounted officers into a stadium. Nor when police happily stood by and laughed as pint jars of bodily fluid were hurled over us, Bastards!

But all in all that was proper football. We got in a few scraps, we hurled offensive songs, and we stood up the entire match. Not even just for fun, but because there were no seats. Safe bloody standing, glory be safe standing. The KFA kicked up an almighty fuss about that, claiming safety concerns and the like. And yet like at every other game with standing only, nothing happened at all, we all came home and the atmosphere was brilliant in spite of the shit result. Maybe those bastards will pull their finger out of their arses, forget that singular incident, which was entirely self inflicted, and allow the rest of us law abiding fans to enjoy the damned game.

Mr Spleen

As per usual, everything this nutter says is entirely his own opinion and in no way should be taken as the views of OTLWTL, or those of Kalumbans in general. In fact we are a jovial and friendly people and pissed, grumpy old farts like this fella don't even represent a minority of the popuation...honest.

by **Lymantatia** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 8:01 pm

TeleSat and Stuff
This is a channel guide on TeleSat. The next part will follow. Also, this is the logo below. The RP series "TeleSat and Stuff" will be a channel surf. Bear in mind that there aren't much channels in Lymantatia unlike the US.

0-49 Entertainment
1 - LTN1 (HD)
2 - LTN2 (HD)
3 - LTN3 (HD)
4 - LTN4 (HD)
5 - LTN5 (HD)
6 - LTN1 +1 (one hour timeshift)
7 - LTN2 +1 (one hour timeshift)
8 - LTN3 +1 (one hour timeshift)
9 - LTN4 +1 (one hour timeshift)
10 - LTN5 +1 (one hour timeshift)
15 - TV6 (HD)
20 - TV6 +1 (one hour timeshift)
25 - Telesat TV (HD)
39 - Comedy Channel (HD)
40 - Telesat TV +1 (one hour timeshift)
44 - LTN 3D (HD)
49 - Fashion TV (HD)
50-99 Lifestyle and Culture
50 - TV Chef (HD)
51 - TV Chef +1 (one hour timeshift)
60 - Travel TV (HD)
61 - Travel TV +1 (one hour timeshift)
70 - History Network (HD)
71 - History Network +1 (one hour timeshift)
80 - Téléfemme (HD)
81 - Téléfemme +1 (one hour timeshift)
90 - Art TV (HD)
91 - Art TV +1 (one hour timeshift)
100-149 Movies and Music
100 - CineLTN (HD)
101 - CineLTN +1 (one hour timeshift)
104 - CineLTN Action (HD)
105 - CineLTN Action +1 (one hour timeshift)
108 - CineLTN Comedy (HD)
109 - CineLTN Comedy +1 (one hour timeshift)
112 - CineLTN Drama (HD)
113 - CineLTN Drama +1 (one hour timeshift)
116 - CineLTN Romance (HD)
117 - CineLTN Romance +1 (one hour timeshift)
120 - CineLTN International (HD)
121 - CineLTN International +1 (one hour timeshift)
124 - CineLTN Family (HD)
125 - CineLTN Family +1 (one hour timeshift)
128 - CineLTN Classic (HD)
129 - CineLTN Classic +1 (one hour timeshift)
132 - CineLTN Science Fiction (HD)
133 - CineLTN Science Fiction +1 (one hour timeshift)
150-199 Sports and News
151 - Telesat Sports 1 (HD)
152 - Telesat Sports 2 (HD)
153 - Telesat Sports 3 (HD)
154 - Telesat Sports 4 (HD)
155 - Telesat Sports 5 (HD)
160 - Telesat College Sports 1 (HD)
170 - Telesat College Sports 2 (HD)
180 - Telesat High School Sports (HD)
181 - NewsLTN (HD)
182 - NewsLTN Politics
183 - NewsLTN Business
190 - Telesat Religion
200-299 Kids
200 - TV Toon (HD)
201 - TV Toon +1 (one hour timeshift)
202 - CLTN Jr. (HD)
203 - CLTN Jr. +1 (one hour timeshift)
204 - AnimeTV (HD)
205 - AnimeTV +1 (one hour timeshift)
208 - CLTN (HD)
209 - CLTN +1 (one hour timeshift)
212 - TeenLTN (HD)
213 - TeenLTN +1 (one hour timeshift)
214 - Echo (HD)
215 - Echo +1 (one hour timeshift)
218 - Echoette
219 - Echoette +1 (one hour timeshift)
220-299 International
220 - LTN Pasceaux (HD)
221 - Dutzenderland TV 1 (DTV1)
222 - Dutzenderland TV 2 (DTV2)
223 - Dutzenderland TV 3 (DTV3)
224 - Dutzenderland TV 4 (DTV4)
225 - CdRY 1 (Yttribia)
226 - CdRY 2 (Yttribia)
227 - CdRY 3 (Yttribia)
228-299 - TG to use (only 5 per nation and 8 per user!)
300-319 Adult
300-319 - Adult PPV
320-329 Radio
321 - LTN Radio 1
322 - LTN Radio 2
323 - LTN Radio 3
324 - LTN Radio 4
325 - LTN Radio 5
326 - Telesat Radio Pop
327 - Telesat Radio Rock
328 - Telesat Radio Oldies
329 - Telesat Radio Foreign
Lymantatia 0–3 Blouman Empire
Posted at 9:00pm 2013 December 15 by Edmund Diamond - Well, we got no goals for our team, man! It's because of the fast Robert Schmitz, who can easily take down a goalkeeper very fast. Man, Lymantatia has not much reflex.
Goalscorers
18 minutes - Robert Schmitz (Blouman Empire)
31 minutes - Robert Schmitz (Blouman Empire)
41 minutes - Robert Schmitz (Blouman Empire)
Current Statistics
Average number of time of goals: N/A
Average number of time of goals by other teams: 30 minutes
Most goals by person on Lymantatia's team: N/A

by **Dutzenderland** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 8:09 pm

The RP series will be a Pretty Cure fanmade series named "La Forêt Pretty Cure/ラフォレプリキュア". It will take place in Dutzenderland.
La Forêt Pretty Cure (Sneak Peak)
Cures
Mika Konoha/木葉美花/Cure Arbor/キュアアーバー - Nicknamed "Master/主君"
Minami Ameizumi/雨泉美波/Cure Eau/キュアオー - Nicknamed "Friend/友人"
Asami Hita/日田朝美/Cure Volcan/キュアボルカン - Nicknamed "Child/子供"
Isami Yamachi/山地勇美/Cure Terre/キュアテール - Nicknamed "Strongest/最強"
Natsuko Harukaze/春風夏子/Cure Vent/キュアベント - Nicknamed "Genius/天才"
Dutzenderland 4–1 New Rhodes
Posted at 9:00pm 2013 December 15 by Yoshio Fujiwara - We trampled over the team from New Rhodes.
Goalscorers
50 minutes - N/A (New Rhodes)
10 minutes - Hiroto Koizumi (Dutzenderland)
18 minutes - Hiroto Koizumi (Dutzenderland)
33 minutes - Shōji Fuyuki (Dutzenderland)
67 minutes - Shōji Fuyuki (Dutzenderland)
Current Statistics
Average number of time of goals: 42 minutes
Average number of time of goals by other teams: 30 minutes
Most goals by person on Dutzenderland's team: Both

by **San Jose Guayabal** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 8:15 pm

A good start

Marvin Núñez
Follow in Pajarraco as: @MaNuPrensa
9:00 P.M

Vladivostok-Alianza, SJG.
The national team of SJG led by Emanuel Inzer has begun in good shape the 67 WC Qualifiers, asserting experience and home advantage for solving increased the game today in the Estadio Nacional Augusto Amador in the capital with a good 2-0 to the national team of The Holy Forden Church.

The game started at the agreed time, at 10:30 PM (local time of SJG) under a freezing temperature of -10°C and a blizzard of low intensity which fortunately left the stadium before starting the match but moderately thick fog left but did not prevent the development of the game.

SJG started the match with the typical pattern of 3-3-3-1 conservative and prudent style, with a base of players playing abroad (ten of eleven starting players plus two players who were on the bench) while The Holy Forden Church began with a 4-4-2 defensively and try to take every opportunity they might have in their favor. SJG began looking gain mastery in midfield to allow baste dangerous moves by Rudy Valencia William Maldonado and while that happened, The Holy Forden Church retreated in the defensive zone to avoid any error or mishap.

At 16 minutes, Rudy Valencia was fouled at the edge of the area penalty and a player of The Holy Forden Church received a yellow card, Rodolfo Zelaya was responsible for the free kick that bounced off the left upright post and the ball remained in the foot of William Maldonado where the player of Skyline City from Mangolana, scored the first goal that put the stadium in a joy feeling.

After the goal SJG, The Holy Forden Church fell even more, turning a 4-4-2 alignment to a 5-4-1, to avoid a catastrophe, while advancing the action, the match was stopped after 30 minutes because the fog intensified, the game restarted twenty minutes after the stadium roof was closed to prevent the fog , The Holy Forden Church was emboldened and find a good time to attack the defense, Matías Passarelli , committed a foul in the area and was sent off 40 minutes played, a player of the Holy Forden Church performed his penalty, which was saved by Henry Hernandez and that was the last chance he had the Holy Forden Church in the party, in it was stopped by the railroad defense placed by Emanuel Inzer, who replace Sean Fraser and put in place Herbert Sosa and concluded the match with a 1-0 in favor of SJG.

At the start of the second half, you could see that SJG wanted to solve the game from the start of the second half, for generating opportunities as a shot against the crossbar Rudy Valencia, a goal disallowed Jonathan Fana and a forward position by Jairo Henríquez but SJG continued perseverance to find the second goal of the night , which came 66 minutes by Rudy Valencia, which received a pass from William Maldonado could run a long distance shot that bounced off the crossbar and then entered to the goal, and the match was placed in a comfortable 2-0 for SJG, who was devoted in the last twenty minutes trying to make passes to open the defense of The Holy Forden Church, but could not be performed more goals, so that after 90 minutes, the match ended with a 2-0 win which gives us the first three points of the Qualifiers.

MATCHDAY ONE


Estadio Nacional - 140,548 (Vladivostok-Alianza)


San Jose Guayabal    2 - 0    The Holy Forden Church

        ('16) Maldonado                   
        ('66) Valencia                     
                                   
         Rudy Valencia                Man of the Match            Unknown

by **Jeru FC** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 8:18 pm

Princess Katy and Dream Lord after a Jeru FC 3-2 win

DL: Hey bitch
Katy: Oh it's you dreamy
DL: So what do you of my performance today? I scored a goal
Katy: A monkey could have scored that goal, you didn't do the hard work
DL: Oh come on, I planned to be right here
Katy: Likely story

DL: So, how is the little one?
Katy: Good, I left her with grandma. She loves babies
DL: No new music
Katy: It's really hard to write songs when you've got a toddler
DL: I wouldn't know
Katy: Well you aren't a Mum aren't you

DL: I suppose not, it's kinda tricky that one
Katy: Little boys are really hard to manage I tell ya
DL: Mum says that, and she's talking about me now
Katy: I'd take a little girl anytime
DL: What it with girls and your family?
Katy: I don't know. I hear you're missing a few toes

DL: Just a small incident
Katy: Like what?
DL: A mine almost blew my feet off
Katy: Lucky you
DL: But we're tough at Jeru FC here
Katy: Pity about the maturity

DL: We're grown up! Mostly
Katy: Likely story
DL: At least we're good at football
Katy: Keeps you out of trouble for 1 year
DL: I wouldn't say it does either
Katy: Figures

DL: I got myself a GF
Katy: About time, what's her name?
DL: Katy
Katy: She's a redhead right?
DL: How did you guess
Katy: She very intelligent?

DL: Not really
Katy: Just like yourself
DL: Aren't you married yet?
Katy: No, boyfriend is a bit weird even when we have a kid already
DL: What's he do?
Katy: He's a drummer in punk band

DL: Oh the Cannibal Cats
Katy: Yep, I actually don't like their music
DL: So why is he with you
Katy: He says I'm more sane than his mates.
DL: God
Katy: I guess there's crazier people than us out there

by **United Gordonopia** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 8:44 pm

The atmosphere in downtown Gordonopia City could have been called subdued at best. It was a weekend, yes, and Saturdays always stunted the metropolitan bustle. The fact that it was the day after, though, only made it worse. All the buildup, all the hype, and Gordonopia had lost its opener to a nobody squad from a place that was apparently a country, Hopnation. The boys hadn't even scored a goal.

It wasn't always like this. The national team had suffered defeat many times, same as any side. Though it sometimes caused panic, unrest, there had never been such a sober mood. It was as if the stagnation that had resulted after the glorious semi-final all those years ago had finally hit home.

Was it anger? No. No protestors had taken to the streets. No dailys calling for Ströhm's prompt sacking were leaving the newstand shelves.

Was it sadness? Perhaps. There was no sense of a national mourning, though, for the team's failure.

It was simply weariness. Melancholy. Apathy.

Even the club sides were fairing little better. Sure, the GPL remained at the pinnacle, the top three in the world. But had they won it all yet? No. The swift ascent to the top had been met with plateau, as talented side after talented side made an impact but never brought home an actual trophy. Hell, FC Deska was ranked number one in the world, and it was one of only four number-one clubs to have not even won a trophy. Even domestically, the same few sides were winning it year after year like clockwork.

For a man who made a living glorifying, narrating, upholding sports, it was a sad time. Don Hersch couldn't help but feel that the best of his writing abilities couldn't help put a good light onto Gordonopia's football situation. What could he say? 'Huzzah! We have more of the same!' ? If he turned to attacks, to vitriol, though, he may as well give it all up and join a tabloid.

He was hoping that a suggestion from his on-again-off-again lover, Aria Fowler, would bring him something. During uni, Don had written a silly column during his time at Imperial University where he suggested people needed to support the University's female teams more. Silly not because of the content, but because he had written it after attending his one and only women's football match; a 4-0 slugging of Winslow. He had not been to a game since.

After a recent encounter at Old Field, Aria had suggested Don go to one, now seventeen years after that original piece. After a bit of pushing, he had agreed. A match between Imperial and its bitter crosstown archrival, National, was scheduled for today and Don had managed to snag some excellent tickets.

As he approached the stadium, not Imperial's venerable Parkside nor the colossal Fürst Track, but a smaller field that had been constructed for the outdoor sports with a smaller following. He was happy to see that the 5,000 seats appeared to be full; many university's could not say the same for their women's teams. It was a rivalry match, though, so Don supposed that could inflate the numbers.

As he settled into his seat, second row behind the half line, Don surveyed the scene. A fair number of students seemed to be there; probably helped by their free admittance. The rest seemed to be a motley collection of parents, youth teams, and the odd regular fan. Not what he would have seen if it were the men's side, but at least the rows were full.

Typical pre-match show was followed by the play itself. He had expected what he had seen two decades ago; a good showing by players who knew what they were doing, but certainly wouldn't hack it in a top league, or even their own league for that matter. What he got made him question that expectation.

The first few minutes were a display of skill, finesse, and agility. An emphasis on ball handling and teamwork. Good plays up and down the field. Not the physicality or the raw talent of an FC Deska or Basin Plain by any means, but damn good football. One or two of them might have even made it on the field for a Regional League side. The rest of the match continued in much the same fashion, and Don was drawn increasingly in.

What he saw, though, the crowd seemed to miss. Sure, they cheered as Imperial went up 1-0, restrained themselves as National tied the score, and yelled as Imperial pulled ahead in the 87th. But the raw emotion seemed to be missing. It was as if they were just there for a fun distraction from the norm, not to give themselves over to pitch. Don had come in that same mindset, but as soon as he saw the play a light switched on. He knew why Aria had suggested the match. He knew that something had been missing. What he didn't know was how he could put it on paper, how he could make it happen.

After the match, the walk back to the sub seemed to fly by as he dived into his thoughts. He had to write about this, had to call for something. Women's dominance a la Cassadaigua? Of course not, he wasn't mad. A mixed league? Perhaps... Something else?

The long ride to his flat was filled with a rapid succession of thoughts that he barely had time to scrawl in his notebook before another one popped in. By the time he arrived at his station, he had filled several pages and almost hoped the ride could have gone for longer. With a swiftness he hadn't felt in years, Don practically sprinted home.

Eschewing the elevator, he rushed up the stairs, and as soon as he had thrown open the door dashed over to the computer. The few seconds it took to boot seemed like ages, but with the password in, the little jingle finished, and a word processor open, his thoughts poured onto the page.

The heroes took to the field, brilliant in their brightly colored uniforms. On the surrounding hills, multitudes had gathered to witness their clash. A cloudy day, no chance of sun but not quite foretelling rain, set a perfect mood.Though one seemed to come every year, these two great rivals always awaited their next meeting with both confidence and fear.

As a horn blew, one side rushed ahead. Clad in a shining silver and lavish violet, the vanguard probed for weaknesses, thrusting forward at the emergence of the smallest opening. Their foes reserves, armored in jade and sapphire, were always quick to counter, pushing the battle back again and again.

Like Perkins on the Danbar, the lavender warriors finally broke through half an hour after the start of the battle, streaming through a gap made by one of their own. Unfortunately for them, their enemy was not so quick to surrender. As their center began to collapse, the green and blue blitzed up the right flank to drive their own spear into the heart of the other side.

By sixty minutes, the score was 1-1.

If that last line failed to give it away, this is not an article about some glorious battle fought eons ago, nor an excerpt from the latest fantasy hit. Contrary to your new expectation, though, it not an account of a football match Garland Reid wrote a few decades ago. It is simply my attempt to put into words the feeling I felt watching Imperial University's woman's football team edge out National.

Woman's football? Is this some kind of joke? A witty satire? In one simple word: no.

Over the past few years, it seems that Gordonopian football has grown stale. While our heroes on the track are finally making a mark on the world stage, our warriors on the pitch seem to be mired between respectability and victory. While we have achieved more than most nation's in so short a time, we have failed to push forward.

Though the emergence of New Gordonopia did something to shake up the playing field, we have had nothing to truly shock our systems since the GPL entered the top three and Gordonopia made the semifinals. Today, I thought of something to provide us a new jolt.

In many countries, the small population allows for many of their women to compete in the top levels of the sport. With just as many top-flight teams in Gordonopia as a nation a fraction of a percent the size, it is quite possible for the best women to play with the best men. In others countries, female dominance is enforced by longstanding cultural norms quite the opposite of our own.

Unfortunately for the incredibly talented women of Imperial and National, all of whom are essentially playing at the highest level they can, that reality is not existent in Gordonopia. When my colleague Aria Fowler published an article in Gordonopian Runner calling for greater attention to woman's sports, she was not necessarily calling for mixed leagues; we need only to look at track times to show that men and women compete differently.

There is, though, a space for women in Gordonopia's 'Beautiful Game'. When some of the best women at the match I watched could certainly compete with professionals in our top couple tiers, a women's league drawing from the best of our collegiate athletes could certainly give us play as fine as the Regional Leagues do now, perhaps even rewarding the winners with Series B berths. If some of the players are good enough, perhaps they could even be given a chance with the National Team...

This would certainly cause a ruckus.

by **Mizuyuki** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 10:11 pm

Honda Midori

$22.5 million. It was a figure that kept repeating itself - as if a broken record had been placed on a gramophone.

Throughout my entire life, all 17 years of it, I had never had cause to count beyond the princely sum of 250,000 aurorae, and that was when my admittedly subpar mathematical skills were enlisted by my parents to calculate the interest they'd need to pay on the bank loan they were taking out for the purchase of a brand spanking-new house in the suburbs of Celestia.

$22.5 million. I faced little difficulty in juggling staggering amounts of cash when they were purely abstract, in the form of a maths question set by my teachers, or perhaps a little quiz in the daily newspapers that my father assiduously read from cover to cover. It was when I was faced with impending reality that the incomprehension, or perhaps blankness, laced with a hint of surrealism, set in; even now, almost a day after the deal was done and dusted, I found it hard to believe, let alone accept, the fact that I was worth even more than my parents had made in a lifetime of endless toil in their stuffy, overcrowded and frankly unpleasant workplaces - and Life had so kindly graced me with an extra cherry as the final, most fitting complement for the already luxurious cake - I had achieved all that by doing what I loved most.

As many football players and harried agents will attest, the UICA transfer window ranks high in the list of the most frenetic periods of the cycle, which is perhaps only topped by the World Cup finals. The consummate wheeler-dealers out in full force, looking for yet another bargain bin signing to bolster their ranks, the agents desperately touting their clients to all and sundry, the last minute transfers and ungainly, unbecoming scrambles to land that coveted player, and the classic epitome of a hectic transfer window - the prolonged transfer sagas which left even the most seasoned journalists bewildered - will he go? Will he stay? Only the bugger knows, and he's damn well going to leave us hanging right up to the final seconds of the window. Many an acquaintance of mine in the unforgiving field of football journalism have been known to exclaim in exasperation during the transfer window - it has even elicited a few choice oaths from my cultured and mild-mannered agent, who was left pulling his already sparse hair out in tufts.

Fortunately, he had no cause to do so while in my service. When I first put pen to paper on an initial two-year contract with Mikan Wave during my rookie days, there existed only one football team that I would willingly play for - that was, of course, Mikan. The thought of using Mikan, which was at the time a rather mediocre mid-table team, as a springboard onto bigger and better things had never crossed my mind, however rational a decision it might have been.

I was confident that any offer, however lucrative, would not suffice to tempt me away from the team that had given me my break in football. I was equally assured that Mikan would be more than willing to match any contract offers that the domestic giants of Mizuyuki would put on the table. After all, I was merely a future prospect, unlikely to command hefty salaries in line with the most prestigious of players, and by extension not likely to be subject to a multi million aurorae contract.

Nonetheless, it appears that Life has had plans for me ever since It dictated that I was to catch the attention of Mikan's manager, Cai Lunyuan.

I'm not usually one to blow my own trumpet, but it would be churlish to deny that I played no small part in Mikan's gradual rise up the table of the Miria Aurora league. Oh, we had a few slip-ups - but those went largely unnoticed by our would-be rivals as upset after upset happened with alarming regularity, so much so that the media took to branding the season as The Season of Waterloo. Indeed, it worked to our favour - for Mikan's penchant for regular, understated victories asserted itself magnificently in the latter half of the season. With the timely aid of a couple of defeats for our nearest challengers, Mikan quietly slipped into the top four. I, along with fellow attacker Taka, were the stars of the show - notching a combined 20 goals and 14 assists for Mikan over the span of fifteen matches, a highly respectable return for what was supposed to be a mid-table team.

We had never been in the top ten, let alone the top four, ever since the Generation of Glories a full decade ago finished as runner-ups to a resurgent Little Busters team in the Old Leagues. The singularly wonderful achievement set the seal on an annus mirabilis for the team. In addition to breaking our ten-year hoodoo in the domestic league, Mikan also succeeded in their bid to lift the domestic cup - again, a trophy that had been missing from the dusty cabinet in the club's museum for many a year now, before this season.

Mikan captured the imagination of the neutrals and the purists, and above all, we put on a damn good show for the fans.

The emotion that I felt as the team linked hands, the sensation that emerged from the recesses of my being as we hoisted a joyful Mr. Cai high up in front of the Sasaki Morio stand - it could only be described as pride.

A pure, passionate pride that embodied the love I felt for the club - for everything associated with it, down to the last inch of the pitch.

Yet, despite our best efforts, Mikan's success was not going to last. In retrospect, it was wholly inevitable. The signs were there from the very start - a chink in the club's armour, if you will, that proved to be its ultimate Achilles heel.

To quote the Scripture - "the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away".

Mikan's descent into oblivion began right at the height of our euphoria, a cruel blow that shattered our dreams of glory and success with Mikan.

During a session of preseason training, I was called into Mr. Cai's office. He was not usually given to disrupt training on a mere whim, and thus I surmised that he had something of import to discuss with me in person. Little did I know that my session with him was going to overturn my own career and life, permanently.

"We've been forced, by circumstances outside our control, to transfer list all of our players, Midori. As it stands, we can no longer afford to keep our players on the salaries that they are presently on."

Mr. Cai's words jolted me. I had for some time been aware that the club's finances were in a parlous state - that much was clear by Mr. Cai's previous exhortations for us to win the Imperial Cup. His talk then still rang in my ears - "if we don't win this thing and the prize money that comes along with it, Mikan just might have to go into administration".

I had to fight to keep control of my emotions, which were threatening to burst forth, as Mr. Cai continued to speak. From what little I could garner from the conversation, the petitioner in administration appointed jointly by the League and the MFA had declared the club insolvent; orders had been issued to liquidate whatever assets the petitioner could get his hands on; and that final sentence, a sentence which I knew would come, yet still cut through me.

The pain was palpable. "We'll be listening to all offers for Mikan's players. So far, there's been several clubs showing an interest in acquiring your services, and unfortunately, that means that ... you'll have to leave Mikan Wave."

Mr. Cai sighed and turned away, allowing me to shed my tears silently in some semblance of privacy.

"I know you've been one of Mikan's most dedicated servants thus far, Midori, and let me tell you, the idea of selling you isn't one I would entertain. If the circumstances were different, I would probably be threatening to step down as manager if you weren't removed from the transfer list with immediate effect."

A brief pause followed. "But ... as it stands, we need the transfer fee that our players would command to fill in the gaping hole that is our finances."

I could hear the emotion in Mr. Cai's voice. "And, to that end ... I will most probably be let go as well. I'm told that the owners can no longer afford to keep a manager on the payroll, not even on a fraction of my current salary. The earnings from our league placing and Cup success have already been suspended by the MFA pending their commission of detailed investigations into the club's murky finances."

A single teardrop fell onto Mr. Cai's nameplate on his desk as I wordlessly rose from my seat.

I could bear it no longer. I had to leave, or risk breaking down completely in front of my manager. At the very least, I was determined not to show my weakness in front of anyone else, not until I could hide myself in a dark corner of my room and let my emotions flow from me freely.

As the door swung shut behind me, Mr. Cai spoke to me as my manager for the last time.

"It's an honour to have been your manager, Midori."

For a few days following that fateful meeting, I found myself lifeless and listless - a far cry from my condition at the start of preseason. I had not wanted to accept the fact that I had to leave the club I loved so much, even though I had been there barely a full season. It is wonderful what a whole season of camaraderie and friendship can foster - in me, it served to crystallise an unbreakable bond between me and the team as a whole.

Depressed by my impending departure, I spent my days skipping training and surfing the Internet on my laptop, reliving Mikan's glory days during the previous season - which, to me, seemed almost an eternity away. I browsed through old news stories triumphantly proclaiming Mikan as the next 'big thing', watched and rewatched video clips of Mikan's Imperial Cup final against Hitachi Surf and our overjoyed celebrations as the final penalty was tucked away far beyond the reach of the goalie, I obsessively searched for articles praising Mikan's progressive play.

I would not simply let go of the one entity that I cherished the most. No, I could not.

The inevitable finally came to pass, despite my clinging onto the faint hope that some miracle would happen and drag Mikan out of the quagmire of financial ruin.

As all personnel had been placed on gardening leave following an official announcement made by the club hierarchy, the message found its way to me through the Internet, in the form of a small, blinking icon in my email app - 24 hours before the UICA transfer window ended. I consciously restrained myself from clicking on the icon, in the hope that the offer would be rescinded. Yet, I realised deep down that there was no chance that Mikan was going to escape administration or even liquidation if I didn't open the seemingly inconsequential email squatting in my app.

After half a day of dallying in indecision, I steeled myself and made my move.

$22.5 million. That was the figure that a foreign club had bidded for my sporting and image rights, along with a handsome basic salary, excluding further performance-oriented addons.

A momentary elation flooded through me - Mr. Cai had told me that the club only needed to garner around $40 million from player sales, and if the offer was accepted, as I knew it would be, that left Mikan needing to make up only a further $17.5 million. The outlook for the club was suddenly far more positive than it had been in the past week of gloom.

$22.5 million - a sum of money that would, in all probability, go a long way towards rescuing the club from financial disaster. I had no idea what possessed the foreign club, one Mignon Beart Charmers of Northern Sunrise Islands, to bid such a high price for me - perhaps they saw me as a rough diamond with innate talent, and thus went high with their bid.

Accompanying the figure was a short message, composed by the club's corporate secretary.

"Midori, there has been two offers for your services - one from the Equestrian States, one from Northern Sunrise Islands. The Sunrisians barely outbid the Equestrian outfit, so the club has gone ahead and accepted the offer from Mignon. It's now up to you to thrash out personal terms with them - please get in touch with your agent at the earliest possible opportunity, for the club needs to get this deal pushed through today if we're to stand a chance of survival."

I flopped back onto my bed as the contents of the message swirled through my mind, raging as though in a maelstrom.

$22.5 million. I$27.5 million. 112.5 million aurorae.

Was it compensation commensurate with my sacrifice? Was it a sum that was to ultimately save my beloved club? Or was it a pittance for my services?

I didn't know. I still don't know.

Note - World XI submission, Honda Midori, left winger.

by **HopNation** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 10:13 pm

SPORTS

Dec. 15th, 2013
pg S1

Match Day 2 Preview
Furellum (135) vs HopNation (270)
Location: Duke's grounds in Altsby
Furellum
Starters
1   Gregor Petrovich       GK
5   Sorin Vladimirescu     LB
3   Ragnar Asbjorn         LCB
2   Bronislav Mlaker       CB
15  Marian Constantin      RCB
4   Fyodor Iosef*          RB
7   Symon Maksimov         LM
8   Robert Alexandrescu    M
9   Germogen Sokoloff      RM
10  Moisey Vaduva          LS
11  Eleazar Szczelazxczyk  RS

Reserves
12  Volodya Dumitrescu     GK
14  Vyacheslav Lagunov     D
6   Lievin Zaboulon        D
16  Nicolae Popescu        M
17  Luka Zelenko           M
18  Havryil Petrov         F
19  Boleslav Balan         F

*Captain
Coach: Bogdan Antonescu
HopNation
Starters
1  Oeny Subanos*     GK
5  Lecho Loontas    CB
9  Sid Raefwar      RB
12 Rayrd Lesamnal   CB
21 Icha Wiashrod    LB
10 Pheir Droimpol   AM
4  Teur Smuemund    DFM
14 Leuld Biaddan    DFM
22 Eisa Loostin     AM
30 Ike Myer         AM
11 Pech Schytaing   F

Reserves
25 Eburo Chroollack GK
6  Ess Nysistia     LB
18 Steat Nykaugh    RB
24 Kins Houndtin    CB
26 Thriaw Arcerton  DFM
8  Uraka Ildechban  AM
19 Eenu Zysamenth   F

*Captain
Coach: Warren Schmidt
Furellum

Furellum lost their previous match 0-1, so they will be looking to get back to form in this game. The team has a mix of creatures playing for them so it’s hard to know exactly how the game play out. They are playing in what looks to be a 5-3-2, based on the list of starters but they have it down as a 5-4-2 on the charts. They are another very defensive team and will be in their home greens.

HopNation National Team (Hops)

The Hops will be playing in a 4-2-3-1 as they did against United Gordonopia. Coach Schmidt is likely to leave things unchanged for the line-up and style as things seemed to work well for them in the last match. The home crowd could have played a huge factor for the Hops while on familiar turf, but they will be on uncharted soil in this game as they have never been to Furellum. They will look to possess more this game but still attack down the wings using short quick passes, they will be wearing their away orange.

Predictions on this match: HopNation 2 – 2 Furellum

I think the Hops will fair well on the road, surprising another team ranked higher than they are. The two teams will square off again in Rhizome Arena on December 27th.

Next Opponent: Home vs Cquactar (329)

HopNation Group Stage Record: 1-0-0

by **Kinzar** » Sun Dec 15, 2013 11:07 pm

Kevin vs Steve: Matchday 2

Our two soccer personalities, Kevin Gallant, the biggest Kinzite expert on World Cup soccer that you’ll find; and Steve Dwyer, the average Kinzite citizen who thinks soccer is very boring are going head to head for bragging rights as they make predictions on qualifying matches.

Recapping matchday 1, you could say that expert schooled the newbie. Kevin scored on his pick for Kinzar to beat New Sideburn, and on his pick of Andossa se Mitrin Vega beating Sandwich Territories. This gives him 14 points. Steve went pointless, failing when he bet against Kinzar. His picks for Qazox and New Montreal States to win were also unsuccessful. Let’s get to their matchday 2 predictions!

Kevin Gallant:

I would almost feel sorry for the poor chap Dwyer on his start if he didn’t have the audacity to say “Who’s ever heard of Starblaydia?” I hope that he wasn’t serious because it’s one thing to not like soccer, but totally another to be completely oblivious to the world. With that out of the way, how about our Wildcats? An impressive 1-0 win out of the gate may have been helped to get a questionable penalty kick, and I do feel for Catherine Harper a bit, who’s gonna have to miss a game against Eura. They’re good, by the way, Steve. Like, defending champion good. Speaking of Eura, that’s Kinzar’s next opponent and it will be on the road. I think the Wildcats will start with some momentum off this win and play the champs tough for a little while, but eventually the class of Eurans will take over. Because I’ll feel a little sorry for Steve, I’ll make the Eura pick for just the lone point. If you want a score prediction: 1-0 Eura at halftime, 4-1 final.

For my second pick, group 6 has a good one between the Northern Sunrise Islands and the Sylvanaes Queendom. In my opinion this is a case of one team rising, and one team falling; and the team that’s rising had a bye day to start. Northern Sunrise Islands will cruise to a win over the Mystical Unicorns, by at least 2 goals. (Pick worth 6 points).

The third pick will be a good one between The Inevitable Syndicate, and Mapletish in group four. The former hosts want to show that they can qualify for the World Cup without the benefit of being the host nation, and I expect them to come out hard against Mapletish, who’s really their only threat in this group anyway. It’ll be tight, but the Syndicate wins. (Pick worth 6 points).

Steve Dwyer:

So Kevin gives me shit about not knowing who Starblaydia is and thinks he’s so smart because he picked the Wildcats. I don’t think picking Kinzar in any game should be a ten point pick. Disappointed that my World Baseball Classic angle failed, but I will try it again here.

I’m not gonna make a pick on the Kinzar-Eura game. Evidently Eura is good at the soccer thing, so Kinzar will be killed. I have to make a group 14 pick though so it will be Sangti to beat New Rhodes. It’s only worth a point, but I need to get on the board here.

My second pick is Ko-oren and Svengarda, and while I want to pick Ko-oren, they are inconsistent in baseball so probably are here too. Picking draws are always worth more even though I think its stupid that soccer games end in ties. (Pick worth 8 points).

The nation of Gregoryisgodistan was in the news because their leader executed a player. Look dude, don’t take this soccer thing so seriously. Greg claims is a deity, but what I don’t understand about that is if he was a deity, wouldn’t Gregoryisgodistan go undefeated in everything thanks to divine intervention? Maybe Greg is a deity, but on the scale of deities, he is a minnow, in comparison to sharks. They’ll get divine intervention this time and beat Hutt River. (Pick is worth 5 points).

That concludes round 2!

by **Star United States** » Mon Dec 16, 2013 12:03 am

Star Sports Magazine
December 15, 2013
First Match is over!

The national team of Star United States faced the team of New North Aqmuland in an away game for our national team. As, predicted by our rival, the game ended up in a draw, but not 1-1, but 3-3.
The rivals put a big obstacle for Star United States.

"Goooooooaaaaaaalllllll" ran through the streets of Star United States when the first goal of the match was scored, putting Star United States in the lead 0-1. The first goal was scored by Soarison on the 19th minute of the match. The same cheer ran through the streets when Star United States scored on the 34th minute by Gonzalez. Putting Star United States in the lead with a score of 0-2. On the 42th minute Nyasi of the rival team managed to steal the ball and score, bringing the game to a score of 1-2.

The whistle whistled on the 45th minute without a second to spare. As the game resumed Star United States had a difficult time getting the ball back, but as soon as Soarison got a hold of the ball, he scored on the 66th minute of match, putting the score to 1-3.
As the match kept going, and on the 70th minute Ofo, of the rival team, scored bringing the game to a score of 2-3. Star United States saw that they needed to protect that last goal for the victory but failed to do so as the ball slipped through the hands of the goalkeeper on the 83th minute bringing the game to a tie, 3-3.

In Group 5, on the first match day, Svengarda took a victory of 4-1 over Jedi8246. Levivania and Alba-Caledonia tied with the score of 3-3. New North Aqmuland tied with Star United States with a score of 3-3. And Crystal Empire took a defeat from Zwanzug With the score of 0-1.

Tomorrow, Star United States will receive the team of Crystal Empire at home at the Star Stadium. This team took a defeat on day one and is probably looking for a victory. Would they be able to be successful at it? We shall see. We have been told that the format and playing players will stay the same.

The team of Star United States has had other teams in the same group, Group 5, thinking. New North Aqmuland press stated the following previous to the match between the two nations: "Star United States should not be underestimated, however, As they also have a decent squad." And from other nations, such as Ko-oren, who stated: "I simply don’t know the team. Which you know, means we shouldn’t underestimate them." ~ Derrek Hauligaruthen. François Libreville (of Ko-oren) stated the following: "United they stand, divided they will fall. They will fall. I can’t stress that enough." And Hothuliren Ysthenthaulen said: "Starting XI has odd numbers, the bench has the even numbers. Clever."

Next Match
December 16, 2013 : Star United States v. Crystal Empire
Location: Star Stadium (Star United States)

World Cup 67 - RP Thread

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