I don't cause zombies. Learn2virology

[-Ebola-]

Hi, eukaryotes. Ebola here. Can you guys please learn some virology? I don't cause zombies. I'm not even related to the virus that causes zombies. It's a DNA virus, I'm an RNA virus, we look nothing alike, and we have completely different methods of attacking cells. We are both transmissible through contact with bodily fluids and we both cause hemorrhaging and organ failure, but beyond that we have absolutely nothing in common.

You'll have an easier time researching a cure if you get over your stereotypes about how all viruses are the same.

[Aksun]

Easier to blame something that is scary.

With that being said (only to have some fun during the event) EBOLA IS THE CAUSE OF THE OUTBREAK!

[-Ebola-]

Easier to blame something that is scary.

With that being said (only to have some fun during the event) EBOLA IS THE CAUSE OF THE OUTBREAK!

You're only going to make it harder to stop the zombies if you keep spreading that kind of misinformation.

[Aksun]

Easier to blame something that is scary.

With that being said (only to have some fun during the event) EBOLA IS THE CAUSE OF THE OUTBREAK!

You're only going to make it harder to stop the zombies if you keep spreading that kind of misinformation.

Or we might prevent a future cause!

[The World Health Organisation]

Hi, eukaryotes. Ebola here. Can you guys please learn some virology? I don't cause zombies. I'm not even related to the virus that causes zombies. It's a DNA virus, I'm an RNA virus, we look nothing alike, and we have completely different methods of attacking cells. We are both transmissible through contact with bodily fluids and we both cause hemorrhaging and organ failure, but beyond that we have absolutely nothing in common.

You'll have an easier time researching a cure if you get over your stereotypes about how all viruses are the same.

Yeah and your going down!
*pulls out vaccine*

[-Ebola-]

Hi, eukaryotes. Ebola here. Can you guys please learn some virology? I don't cause zombies. I'm not even related to the virus that causes zombies. It's a DNA virus, I'm an RNA virus, we look nothing alike, and we have completely different methods of attacking cells. We are both transmissible through contact with bodily fluids and we both cause hemorrhaging and organ failure, but beyond that we have absolutely nothing in common.

You'll have an easier time researching a cure if you get over your stereotypes about how all viruses are the same.

Yeah and your going down!
*pulls out vaccine*

There's no vaccine for Ebola! You're not scaring me with your syringes and hazmat suits and fake vaccines!

[New Pyrrhius]

Ha! Jokes on you! You were eradicated in the 2080s. But then bioterrorists sort of brought you back... But now you're barely even a threat compared to all the gene engineered superviruses we have to deal with.

[The World Health Organisation]

Yeah and your going down!
*pulls out vaccine*

There's no vaccine for Ebola! You're not scaring me with your syringes and hazmat suits and fake vaccines!

You better run, better run faster than my syringe!

[Wisconsin9]

There's no vaccine for Ebola! You're not scaring me with your syringes and hazmat suits and fake vaccines!

You better run, better run faster than my syringe!

Shut up, WHO. I've got some sweet nanobots that'll kill the shit out of that motherfucker. An ounce of prevention might be worth a pound of cure, but why have either one when you can have a pound of both?

[-Ebola-]

Ha! Jokes on you! You were eradicated in the 2080s. But then bioterrorists sort of brought you back... But now you're barely even a threat compared to all the gene engineered superviruses we have to deal with.

It's 2014, dude. If you don't know what year it is, you might want to consider seeking psychiatric care.

There's no vaccine for Ebola! You're not scaring me with your syringes and hazmat suits and fake vaccines!

You better run, better run faster than my syringe!

Pff! I've still got 3 months before they're even going to test that thing.

[The World Health Organisation]

Ha! Jokes on you! You were eradicated in the 2080s. But then bioterrorists sort of brought you back... But now you're barely even a threat compared to all the gene engineered superviruses we have to deal with.

It's 2014, dude. If you don't know what year it is, you might want to consider seeking psychiatric care.

You better run, better run faster than my syringe!

Pff! I've still got 3 months before they're even going to test that thing.

I'm afraid sir, you only have three months to live. Say goodbye to your family, maybe buy your girlfriend something nice to remember you by before you are hacked to pieces and put in a disease storage facility.

[Cerillium]

Yeah and your going down!
*pulls out vaccine*

There's no vaccine for Ebola! You're not scaring me with your syringes and hazmat suits and fake vaccines!

I'm not holding my breath in anticipation of the vaccines. We're looking at one strain alone and what works for it might not work for any of the others.

Also, didn't Nigeria pwn you recently?

[The World Health Organisation]

There's no vaccine for Ebola! You're not scaring me with your syringes and hazmat suits and fake vaccines!

I'm not holding my breath in anticipation of the vaccines. We're looking at one strain alone and what works for it might not work for any of the others.

Also, didn't Nigeria pwn you recently?

I helped Nigeria!

[-Ebola-]

It's 2014, dude. If you don't know what year it is, you might want to consider seeking psychiatric care.



Pff! I've still got 3 months before they're even going to test that thing.

I'm afraid sir, you only have three months to live. Say goodbye to your family, maybe buy your girlfriend something nice to remember you by before you are hacked to pieces and put in a disease storage facility.

Viruses don't have girlfriends. We don't need to bother with relationships and all that jazz because we replicate asexually. You of all people ought to know that as much as you try to fuck with us.

Your vaccines won't kill me off anyway because I have reservoir species.

[Cerillium]

If -Ebola-and The World Health Organisation had a war in this thread....... Hmm Possible Moderation report titles?

[REPORT] WHO threatens Ebola in virology thread
[REPORT] Ebola trolls World Health Organisation

Ah, sleep deprivation. Ignore me, please. Thank you.

[Conscentia]

I dislike how everyone just assumes viruses are to blame for the zombies.
Clearly a fungus is to blame. We've seen them do similar things before.

[The World Health Organisation]

If -Ebola-and The World Health Organisation had a war in this thread....... Hmm Possible Moderation report titles?

[REPORT] WHO threatens Ebola in virology thread
[REPORT] Ebola trolls World Health Organisation

Ah, sleep deprivation. Ignore me, please. Thank you.

I like the first one!

[Felkesjud]

Shut up, WHO. I've got some sweet nanobots that'll kill the shit out of that motherfucker. An ounce of prevention might be worth a pound of cure, but why have either one when you can have a pound of both?

What about three pounds of neither? Not only do you not get the best of both worlds, you break physics while doing so :3
Also, I think we should engineer an ebola strain to make zombies in their aftermath. And, none of that bullshit slow, moaning zombies. These things are like always running until their bodies collapse from overuse and/or decompose. Good luck

[-Ebola-]

There's no vaccine for Ebola! You're not scaring me with your syringes and hazmat suits and fake vaccines!

I'm not holding my breath in anticipation of the vaccines. We're looking at one strain alone and what works for it might not work for any of the others.

Also, didn't Nigeria pwn you recently?

Nah, I still have family there. They just aren't living in a human neighborhood anymore.

[Cerillium]

Nah, I still have family there. They just aren't living in a human neighborhood anymore.

Bats, most likely.

[Wisconsin9]

Shut up, WHO. I've got some sweet nanobots that'll kill the shit out of that motherfucker. An ounce of prevention might be worth a pound of cure, but why have either one when you can have a pound of both?

What about three pounds of neither? Not only do you not get the best of both worlds, you break physics while doing so :3
Also, I think we should engineer an ebola strain to make zombies in their aftermath. And, none of that bullshit slow, moaning zombies. These things are like always running until their bodies collapse from overuse and/or decompose. Good luck

We have a different name for those things. "Heresy."

[-Ebola-]

If -Ebola-and The World Health Organisation had a war in this thread....... Hmm Possible Moderation report titles?

[REPORT] WHO threatens Ebola in virology thread
[REPORT] Ebola trolls World Health Organisation

Ah, sleep deprivation. Ignore me, please. Thank you.

I like the first one!

You really want someone to report you for making death threats?

[The Eastern Antarctic State]

I'm getting all these Ebola ads now, thanks.

[The World Health Organisation]

I like the first one!

You really want someone to report you for making death threats?

To the Ebola Virus, yes.

[Felkesjud]

We have a different name for those things. "Heresy."

It's settled! I'm going to make a nuke to distribute the zombified-Ebola virus across the Eurasian continent, where it will then spread to Africa, and eventually hopefully Australia as well as North and South America :3
Not only is it Ebola. It's in nuke form. Nukes make everything better, right?