Reality's Bane (IC/Open)

[The Dark Brotherhood of Deros]

The Underworld
Hades stood in his underworld, which is what he did whenever he was scheming. Hmm... what should i do to torment poor Pitty-pat and Pretty Palutena today? he thought. he went over to the massive current of souls, and scooped out a few, devouring them. "Ahh... that hits the spot." he said. he would think of something, he always does.

The Squeaks Airship
Daroach, Doc, Storro, and Spinni, all stood on the command deck of their Airship, searching for the lost land of Atlantis. "Oh! i can just imagine the treasure that await us in Atalantis! I'll bet my ears that it will be good!" Daroach said, stroking his ears. "Duhh... yeah boss! its gonna be REAL good. Huh huh huh." Storro said, chuckling. "Just remember, lets not get ourselves into trouble, like we did last time we went looking for treasure. my fur is still scorched from that volcano!" Spinni said, looking at a small patch of dark fur on his stomach. "You worry too much. my calculations to the exact location of Atlantis, indicate a 0.11253% chance of there being any volcanoes." Doc said, floating above them all in his saucer. Daroach chuckled. "Whatever we find, im sure it will be worth it!" he said, smiling.

[The Intergalactic Russian Empire]

Installation 00, Desert
Ford looked out the window and gasped "You're right, Aradia, this is a marvelous discovery. I need to take some notes on this before we blow this place up." Ulrik put his hand on his head and said "I think I just had a brain aneurysm from trying to understand all this future shit." he then used a healing spell and said "Much better, but I still have no idea what anybody is talking about or what any of this is." Ford turned around "Maybe we could create a one way teleporter out of parts that we have here, although I don't think we'll be able to find any ground up moon rocks or anti-matter in this facility, so that's probably out of the picture. Hmm, maybe we could find or build a ship, but we'd need schematics for it. Maybe.......... hold on, give me a few minutes to think of something." he went over to a nearby table and puled out a piece of blue paper and a pen, he then began drawing diagrams on is and muttering "no that won't do, we'd need an anti-gravity generator........ Maybe we could- no we aren't anywhere near a black hole. Hmm, what about opening a rift in- no that could mess with the flow of time if done improperly."


Installation 00, Ice Canyon
Shockwave nodded "Bivtris is correct, we must get to work setting up traps immediately. I'd recommend using nigh undetectable anti-gravity traps. We should set them up at strategic locations on the way here along with heat seeking missiles and remote turrets to finish them off once they're trapped."

[Petrokovia]

Tadayoshi's scanners downloaded tons of information regarding the map in front of him and other information that happened to in front of him. While Sollux hacked the computer, the scanners kept a record of the commands and such used.
"Information download complete."
"Well, my jets are powerful enough for me to carry two people. Or if we had a wagon or something, I could propel that."
"I also have similar jets, though they aren't as strong or durable." said the Bountyhunter.
"I'm sure we could make a sled or something out of one of the doors." mentioned Marguerite.

[The Intergalactic Russian Empire]

Tadayoshi's scanners downloaded tons of information regarding the map in front of him and other information that happened to in front of him. While Sollux hacked the computer, the scanners kept a record of the commands and such used.
"Information download complete."
"Well, my jets are powerful enough for me to carry two people. Or if we had a wagon or something, I could propel that."
"I also have similar jets, though they aren't as strong or durable." said the Bountyhunter.
"I'm sure we could make a sled or something out of one of the doors." mentioned Marguerite.

Ford said "A sled powered by your simple jets would never take us nearly thirty two thousand miles, we need to apply a wanton amount of science to solve this issue. I have an idea, now give me your jets, I could work something more useful out of them."

[Petrokovia]

Tadayoshi's scanners downloaded tons of information regarding the map in front of him and other information that happened to in front of him. While Sollux hacked the computer, the scanners kept a record of the commands and such used.
"Information download complete."
"Well, my jets are powerful enough for me to carry two people. Or if we had a wagon or something, I could propel that."
"I also have similar jets, though they aren't as strong or durable." said the Bountyhunter.
"I'm sure we could make a sled or something out of one of the doors." mentioned Marguerite.

Ford said "A sled powered by your simple jets would never take us nearly thirty two thousand miles, we need to apply a wanton amount of science to solve this issue. I have an idea, now give me your jets, I could work something more useful out of them."

"What? I need my jets for my job!"
"So do I."
"Yeah, but you won't have anyone breathing down your neck if you lose yours."
"Fine. When I kill you I'll just take your shit anyway."
The Bountyhunter took the belt holding his flight jets off of his waist, and handed it to Ford.

[Cybraxia]

Tadayoshi's scanners downloaded tons of information regarding the map in front of him and other information that happened to in front of him. While Sollux hacked the computer, the scanners kept a record of the commands and such used.
"Information download complete."
"Well, my jets are powerful enough for me to carry two people. Or if we had a wagon or something, I could propel that."
"I also have similar jets, though they aren't as strong or durable." said the Bountyhunter.
"I'm sure we could make a sled or something out of one of the doors." mentioned Marguerite.

Ford said "A sled powered by your simple jets would never take us nearly thirty two thousand miles, we need to apply a wanton amount of science to solve this issue. I have an idea, now give me your jets, I could work something more useful out of them."

"Ooooor, I could just 'miracle' us there. It's not difficult. Of course, if you wanted something a bit... oh I don't know, 'sciency', I could call in my company's ships." Michael shrugged.

Qui-Gon scratched his beard. "You seem to have a lot of resources, Mister..."

"Kincaid. Michael Kincaid. Nice to meet you, Master Jinn."

The pleasantries were interrupted when a portal opened and a screaming elderly man was shoved out. "OOOOOOHHH MYYYY GOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!"

[The Intergalactic Russian Empire]

Ford said "A sled powered by your simple jets would never take us nearly thirty two thousand miles, we need to apply a wanton amount of science to solve this issue. I have an idea, now give me your jets, I could work something more useful out of them."

"What? I need my jets for my job!"
"So do I."
"Yeah, but you won't have anyone breathing down your neck if you lose yours."
"Fine. When I kill you I'll just take your shit anyway."
The Bountyhunter took the belt holding his flight jets off of his waist, and handed it to Ford.

Ford then took the belt and pulled some tools out of a pouch on his bandoleer and went to work dismantling it, he then pulled more tools and items out of his bandoleer and continued working "Now, I'm re-engineering these jets to be 10x more fuel efficient, by making them run on plasma, and I'm also building a sled to put the jet engine on to carry all 30 or so of us here. This may take a few minutes to complete." Jade interjected and said "You know I could just teleport us the-" "Shhhhh, I'm busy here. It's not like we're in a hurry or anything."

[Petrokovia]

"What? I need my jets for my job!"
"So do I."
"Yeah, but you won't have anyone breathing down your neck if you lose yours."
"Fine. When I kill you I'll just take your shit anyway."
The Bountyhunter took the belt holding his flight jets off of his waist, and handed it to Ford.

Ford then took the belt and pulled some tools out of a pouch on his bandoleer and went to work dismantling it, he then pulled more tools and items out of his bandoleer and continued working "Now, I'm re-engineering these jets to be 10x more fuel efficient, by making them run on plasma, and I'm also building a sled to put the jet engine on to carry all 30 or so of us here. This may take a few minutes to complete." Jade interjected and said "You know I could just teleport us the-" "Shhhhh, I'm busy here. It's not like we're in a hurry or anything."

"The universe is at stake. We kind of are in a hurry."
"You know, if it just runs on plasma, it's not actually a jet? For it to be a true jet engine, it would have to use air taken in for combustion."

[Aeternabilis]

Installation 00, Cartographer
"You know, we actually kind of are in a hurry. What with the impending destruction of reality and everything. Even if it doesn't take you long to make, it would still take a few hours to get there, considering the distance. How about this: you stay here and work on this rocket sled or whatever, and- Jade, right? Jade teleports everyone who doesn't want to ride Santa's Sleigh of Doom to the control center instantly."

Meanwhile, over where the old man had come from a portal, some trolls had gathered around him.
"Who the fuck is this guy?"

Installation 00, Ice Canyon
"Of course I am right. Set up traps along choke points and turrets at the front doors. I will make their weather a little more... unpredictable, and organize the Sentinels."

[The Intergalactic Russian Empire]

Ford then took the belt and pulled some tools out of a pouch on his bandoleer and went to work dismantling it, he then pulled more tools and items out of his bandoleer and continued working "Now, I'm re-engineering these jets to be 10x more fuel efficient, by making them run on plasma, and I'm also building a sled to put the jet engine on to carry all 30 or so of us here. This may take a few minutes to complete." Jade interjected and said "You know I could just teleport us the-" "Shhhhh, I'm busy here. It's not like we're in a hurry or anything."

"The universe is at stake. We kind of are in a hurry."
"You know, if it just runs on plasma, it's not actually a jet? For it to be a true jet engine, it would have to use air taken in for combustion."

Ford sighed and said "It runs on a similar principle to normal jet engines but instead of normal combustion it takes air in and converts it to plasma for furl." Ulrik was busy in the back holding his hands against his head and saying "I don't understand anything that you people are saying! Why couldn't we go somewhere with things I can understand?" Jade turned to Clay and said "Alright, let's go everyone, unless you want to stay with Stanford here." Stanford said "It's alright, you can go on without me, use your magic for some instant teleportation. I'll be here making my rocket sled." Dipper said "I'll stay here with you Grunkle Ford, it's not like they really need me, anyways."

[Petrokovia]

"The universe is at stake. We kind of are in a hurry."
"You know, if it just runs on plasma, it's not actually a jet? For it to be a true jet engine, it would have to use air taken in for combustion."

Ford sighed and said "It runs on a similar principle to normal jet engines but instead of normal combustion it takes air in and converts it to plasma for furl." Ulrik was busy in the back holding his hands against his head and saying "I don't understand anything that you people are saying! Why couldn't we go somewhere with things I can understand?" Jade turned to Clay and said "Alright, let's go everyone, unless you want to stay with Stanford here." Stanford said "It's alright, you can go on without me, use your magic for some instant teleportation. I'll be here making my rocket sled." Dipper said "I'll stay here with you Grunkle Ford, it's not like they really need me, anyways."

"Interesting concept. I'll go ahead for the teleportation, though. We are in a hurry."
"Tadayoshi will need me to cover his back." Marguerite quipped.
"Hey..."
"Eh, I'll go with the sled. After all, Stanford has my jets..."

[Apto]

Aebrenata
Zarall smiled. "That she does. Now, my other volunteers are currently on their first mission, destroying an artifact with the power to obliterate all thinking life in the local galaxy, but should be back soon enough. You can stay here and wait, probing me for further information on the subject, or if you'd like I can send you to join them. It's really your call, Sayaka."

Sayaka nodded to signal that she was still listening to Zarall.

It took her a moment to truly process everything he said but when she did, it hit her like a screaming freight train straight out of the deepest, blackest depths of hell.

"LOCAL GALAXY?!" The bleunette all but shouted as her shoulders drooped and her jaw hung wide open along with her eyes. "I NEED TO GO NOW!" With that announcement, Sayaka didn't even bother with theatrics. Blue light clung tightly to the young teen's body before quickly dissipating in a shower of sparkles. Gone was her cream colored school uniform and silver ring.

Now, a golden hairpin shaped like a fortissimo adorned her short, boyish, blue hair and a long white cape draped over her shoulders and stopped just short of her blue heeled shoes. Knee-high white socks, a blue diagonal-cut skirt, white gloves, blue arm warmers and a shoulderless top that parted at where her belly button was all combined to make her the very picture of a extremely fancy and young swordswoman.

A moon shaped gem at her navel and the exquisite cutlass held in her right hand shined briefly to signal that she was ready.

[Cybraxia]

Installation 00, Cartographer
"You know, we actually kind of are in a hurry. What with the impending destruction of reality and everything. Even if it doesn't take you long to make, it would still take a few hours to get there, considering the distance. How about this: you stay here and work on this rocket sled or whatever, and- Jade, right? Jade teleports everyone who doesn't want to ride Santa's Sleigh of Doom to the control center instantly."

Meanwhile, over where the old man had come from a portal, some trolls had gathered around him.
"Who the fuck is this guy?"

"Well aren't you considerate..." the old man groaned. He slowly stood up, catching his breath. "Ugh, now where am I? Aaand, what kind of creatures are you?"

Michael turned around. "Is that... ah shit, it's a JoJo. Luckily it seems to be the best JoJo."

[Aeternabilis]

Installation 00, Cartographer
Terezi cackled a little and said, "We're fairy god trolls!"

Over by the map, Clay sighed and said, "Terezi, stop harassing the elderly. Old guy who's name is apparently JoJo, welcome to the Ark. I'm just gonna assume that Zarall sent you and you know everything, but if he didn't and you don't, well... just roll with it. I'm sure you can figure things out. Ulrik, just think of it all as very advanced magic." "Magic isn't real, moron!" "Ford, if you're really gonna take a rocket sled thirty-two thousand miles, for the love of god add a windshield. Jade, I think we're ready to go here, so feel free to teleport us whenever."

Aebrenata
Zarall nodded and said, "Of course." He then waved his hand, forming a green portal in the middle of the kitchen that led to wherever the heroes would be on the Ark.

[The Intergalactic Russian Empire]

Installation 00, Cartographer
Terezi cackled a little and said, "We're fairy god trolls!"

Over by the map, Clay sighed and said, "Terezi, stop harassing the elderly. Old guy who's name is apparently JoJo, welcome to the Ark. I'm just gonna assume that Zarall sent you and you know everything, but if he didn't and you don't, well... just roll with it. I'm sure you can figure things out. Ulrik, just think of it all as very advanced magic." "Magic isn't real, moron!" "Ford, if you're really gonna take a rocket sled thirty-two thousand miles, for the love of god add a windshield. Jade, I think we're ready to go here, so feel free to teleport us whenever."

Aebrenata
Zarall nodded and said, "Of course." He then waved his hand, forming a green portal in the middle of the kitchen that led to wherever the heroes would be on the Ark.

Installation 00, Cartographer

Ford said "Only an idiot would forget to put a windshield on a vehicle that can go over MACH 2." Ulrik said "Alright, let's go. This science still gives me a headache. And magic is real, you caped weirdo!" Jade said "Everyone ready? If you're going to stay here raise your hand." Ford, Dipper, Mabel and Candy raised their hands, when all of the people staying had raised their hands Jade said "Alright, here we go." and teleported the people who didn't raise their hands to the Ice Canyon.

[Aeternabilis]

Installation 00, Ice Canyon
Clay and the trolls all fell to the ground as a result of Jade's teleportation style. After they got up and brushed the snow off themselves, Clay said, "Okay guys, there's the main controls. Let me check the future real quick to see if there are any enemies that we didn't know abo-" "Fuck that!" Vriska said, interrupting Clay. "Those aliens are total bitches! We can totally beat them into the ground again, even if there is a sneak attack. Let's go!" "Vriska, wait!"
But it was too late, as Vriska had already started charging up the snowy ramp. After a second of consideration, the others started chasing after her.

Meanwhile inside the building, Bivtris watched as the heroes appeared from nowhere and started charging up towards them. "Hmm. They got here much faster than anticipated. People! Our current fortifications will have to do. Take up position, and prepare to ambush them."

[The Intergalactic Russian Empire]

Installation 00, Ice Canyon
Clay and the trolls all fell to the ground as a result of Jade's teleportation style. After they got up and brushed the snow off themselves, Clay said, "Okay guys, there's the main controls. Let me check the future real quick to see if there are any enemies that we didn't know abo-" "Fuck that!" Vriska said, interrupting Clay. "Those aliens are total bitches! We can totally beat them into the ground again, even if there is a sneak attack. Let's go!" "Vriska, wait!"
But it was too late, as Vriska had already started charging up the snowy ramp. After a second of consideration, the others started chasing after her.

Meanwhile inside the building, Bivtris watched as the heroes appeared from nowhere and started charging up towards them. "Hmm. They got here much faster than anticipated. People! Our current fortifications will have to do. Take up position, and prepare to ambush them."

Ulrik started running after Vriska "Wait you incompetent buffoon, this is probably what they want! This is most likely a trap!" John then said "Yeah, what if it's a trap? I think the leader of the villains would've sent some people to defend this place aside from the locals."

Meanwhile, Shockwave made some final preparations "There, I had some anti-gravity traps set up at the end of that ramp. We're ready to go."

[Petrokovia]

Tadayoshi and Marguerite hung back for a second.
"He's right. I'm not rushing in there blindly. If we're going to go in, I suggest being more cautious about it."

[Cybraxia]

Installation 00, Ice Canyon
Clay and the trolls all fell to the ground as a result of Jade's teleportation style. After they got up and brushed the snow off themselves, Clay said, "Okay guys, there's the main controls. Let me check the future real quick to see if there are any enemies that we didn't know abo-" "Fuck that!" Vriska said, interrupting Clay. "Those aliens are total bitches! We can totally beat them into the ground again, even if there is a sneak attack. Let's go!" "Vriska, wait!"
But it was too late, as Vriska had already started charging up the snowy ramp. After a second of consideration, the others started chasing after her.

Meanwhile inside the building, Bivtris watched as the heroes appeared from nowhere and started charging up towards them. "Hmm. They got here much faster than anticipated. People! Our current fortifications will have to do. Take up position, and prepare to ambush them."

Ulrik started running after Vriska "Wait you incompetent buffoon, this is probably what they want! This is most likely a trap!" John then said "Yeah, what if it's a trap? I think the leader of the villains would've sent some people to defend this place aside from the locals."

Meanwhile, Shockwave made some final preparations "There, I had some anti-gravity traps set up at the end of that ramp. We're ready to go."

At that moment, two of the Major Biomechanoids walked into view and began firing their rockets. Four of the cloned riflemen opened fire as well. "Shit! Ambush!" Michael yelled, diving behind cover.

"What the hell is going on?" Joseph shouted, also diving for cover, along with both of the Jedi.

[The Intergalactic Russian Empire]

Ulrik started running after Vriska "Wait you incompetent buffoon, this is probably what they want! This is most likely a trap!" John then said "Yeah, what if it's a trap? I think the leader of the villains would've sent some people to defend this place aside from the locals."

Meanwhile, Shockwave made some final preparations "There, I had some anti-gravity traps set up at the end of that ramp. We're ready to go."

At that moment, two of the Major Biomechanoids walked into view and began firing their rockets. Four of the cloned riflemen opened fire as well. "Shit! Ambush!" Michael yelled, diving behind cover.

"What the hell is going on?" Joseph shouted, also diving for cover, along with both of the Jedi.

Ulrik stopped and looked down, he was trapped in mid air after accidentally tripping an anti-gravity trap "IT'S A TRAP!!!" he flailed his arms and legs around in an attempt to get down. Brelyna ran to Ulrik and said "Don't worry, Ulrik, I'll get you- woah!" then was also caught in an anti-gravity trap "Well, we're doomed. This is all your fault, Vriska!" the others all sprang into action, charging the cloned riflemen and attacking them furiously.

[Cybraxia]

At that moment, two of the Major Biomechanoids walked into view and began firing their rockets. Four of the cloned riflemen opened fire as well. "Shit! Ambush!" Michael yelled, diving behind cover.

"What the hell is going on?" Joseph shouted, also diving for cover, along with both of the Jedi.

Ulrik stopped and looked down, he was trapped in mid air after accidentally tripping an anti-gravity trap "IT'S A TRAP!!!" he flailed his arms and legs around in an attempt to get down. Brelyna ran to Ulrik and said "Don't worry, Ulrik, I'll get you- woah!" then was also caught in an anti-gravity trap "Well, we're doomed. This is all your fault, Vriska!" the others all sprang into action, charging the cloned riflemen and attacking them furiously.

All four of the riflemen died instantly. However, the Biomechanoids kept firing rockets, and two sentinels flew into the fray, firing their beams. Michael began firing out of cover, while the other three stayed put.

[Aeternabilis]

Installation 00, Ice Canyon
"Hey fuck you, guy!" Vriska yelled at Ulrik as she threw down the Fluorite Octet. The dice's roll gave her a pirate's cutlass (something she seemed pleased with), and immediately the Thief of Light jumped into battle. She targeted one of the Biomechanoids and zipped around it, slicing and stabbing at anything that could be considered a weak point. Before long, the beast fell, and Vriska stood ready to face the other one. "Ha! Told you it wouldn't be hard! Somebody get those magical losers down while I deal with-"

Just as she said that, Bivtris released the Sentinels. Hundreds of angry drones swarmed outside, shooting their golden lasers at the heroes. Vriska yelped and backed away, then started slashing at the robots. The other trolls joined her, making a valiant effort to destroy all the Sentinels, while Clay rushed over to free Ulrik and Brelyna from the anti-gravity trap.

[The Olog-Hai]

Earth, Early 2000s. Buffy Universe
This demon was a particularly tricky one. Nothing much about it in the books that Willow found. And Giles couldn't find anything either. Spike hasn't heard of this one, so I'm all alone. No worries. An axe to the head should work.
Buffy starts to move quieter. Spotting her prey, she breaks into a sprint.
With a shriek, the demon turns around to get an axe to the head. No real blood comes out, seeing as it's a demon.
With a day's work done, Buffy heads back the the library.
She finds her friends all staring at a weird, glowing green portal.
"What is it?" she asks them.
"I don't know," Willow answers. "I've never seen anything like it."
"Well, they're only one way to find out." Buffy sticks her head inside, and looks around.
Suddenly, she begins to get sucked in. Everyone proceeds to try to grab her an anchor, but get sucked in. They land in a courtyard.
"Well, this is odd."

[The Dark Brotherhood of Deros]

Underworld
Hades was still pondering a way of making Pit's and Palutena's lives miserable, when his thoughts were interrupted by a strange noise. he turned around, to see a portal open behind him. it was pulling him towards it. "Oh! how curious!" he said, jumping back, and away from it. then he sensed something coming from it; evil. a darkness beyond darkness, something almost as evil as him. intrigued by this, Hades stepped through the portal...

Rapporan
to find himself in a terrifying place. it was so... cheerful, the sun was shining, there were rainbows all around him, and a being massively out of place. "Uh... were am i exactly?" the skyscraper sized god asked, scratching his head.

[Osnil]

Gotham-Arkham Asylum
The Joker was contemplating another way to destroy Batman and Robin-something fun and exciting. He thought for a moment and said, "It has to be original. Something funny, but original. What do I do?" He paced back and forth, then a red firey portal appeared, sucking him in.
Rapporan
Joker found himself in a dreary world with no humor. Everyone was serious-like Batman. No color, no humor, no Joker. Joker clutched his chest, "No! This is a horrible place!" He got back up, "Just kidding. It's time to brighten this place up a bit."
World of Trophies
Bowser stomped back and forth across the World of Trophies. "How can I make those Smashers miserable?" he asked himself. Ever since he had rebuilt the Subspace Army, he intended to rule the World of Trophies. As he paced, a red portal appeared, sucking him inside to awake in. . .
Rapporan
The most terrifying place imaginable. No evil, no koopas, happiness. "What is this?" Bowser roared, "I demand to be let out of this place back to my home."