Reality's Bane (IC/Open)

[Osnil]

Rapporan
"So how do we get there?" asked Bowser, turning to Asteraoth.
"That's the best part of a road trip-getting there!" Joker smiled, clapping his hands in delight.
Another portal opened up nearby, revealing Drakken and Co. "Oh, let's go into the giant massive portal, he says. It'll be fun he says!" Shego said sarcastically.
"It wasn't my idea, Shego," Drakken whined.
"He's right, it was Monkey Boy's," Killigan replied.
"Well how was I supposed to know that it would take us to this horrible place?" demanded Monkey Fist.
"I told you to order takeout, but no," Frugal shook his head, "you decided we could go to a fancy restaurant instead."

[Aeternabilis]

Rapporan
Asteraoth's giant form waved his hand, and a huge blood red portal appeared. He pointed at Hades, Bowser, and the Joker and said, "You three. Through the portal. Link up with Bivtris, destroy those who would threaten my beloved Installation." His small form then walked over to Missy, Specter Knight, and the Kim Possible villains (shaking Missy's hand), and said, "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Rapporan." He launched into an expositional onslaught that won't be typed out, because seriously it's just cruel to make me type it out whenever a new group of characters arrive.

Installation 00, Ice Canyon
"And who the fuck is this guy?!" Karkat yelled out, staring at the Doctor. "How the hell do you know my name or my fucking species?"

[Osnil]

Installation 00, Command Center
Bowser and Joker climbed through the portal and into the Command Center. Bowser saw no need to unleash the Subspace Army, but he could control the Shadow Bugs at will to form the troops he wanted, except his Koopas. Joker looked around the room and said, "So, how's about blowing some heroes up?"
Rapporan
"So we get this fancy personal heaven?" asked Drakken, "In exchange for helping take over the world? I'm in!"
"This is the deal of a lifetime!" Frugal said.
"I know. Which is why I will assist in the battle," Monkey Fist replied.
"I'll think about it," Killigan said, then silently pondered for a moment, "I've thought about it. I'm in."
"Sounds great!" Shego said, "but I'd like a signed contract so that we don't get weaseled out of this."

[Apto]

Installation 00, Ice Canyon

Had Durge been human, he most certainly would have had his bones broken. However, as he had no bones to break, it merely cracked his armor. "Oooff!" He fell to the ground, landing on his knees. "You brats are more annoying than Jedi." he grumbled. At that moment, Ugh-Zan snapped out of his stupor (as he had been outside all along. (He's 330 feet tall, he can't really go inside, ya know?)) and snapped his fingers again, summoning 2 dozen beheaded kamikazes. As soon as they spawned, they ran screaming at the heroes. Meanwhile he pulled up his laser cannon and began firing at the heroes.

Sayaka never was that bright.

Academically, she wasn't exceptional outside of Athletics. She tries to review for exams, do assignments and read lessons in advance but just like most teenagers, she found those activities too tedious. If it weren't for her friend Hitomi, she probably wouldn't survive Mitakihara Middle School's extreme curriculum.

Speaking of the verdette, she probably would have told Sayaka that ramming a armored man while wearing nothing but clothing was a horrible idea. Well, Hitomi would have only said that if she was a emotionless monster and not a teenager who just saw her friend dislocate her shoulder in doing so.

The Blueberry bit her tongue as pain wracked her body and she was sent tumbling along with her target. Durge was able to arrest his movement but Sayaka only stopped moving once she hit a wall and gave it a nice new crater.

Clay ran over to both help out with Durge and see if that blue-haired was still alive after smashing into both him and the ground. The battle was very quickly devolving into chaos.

What Clay saw was anything but encouraging.

Clothes dirtied and coated in blood, Sayaka lay motionless on the ground. Her right arm was bent in a unnatural angle and large swathes of muscles and ligaments were exposed to the open air. It stung horribly but she took solace in the crunching noise she heard when she struck the armored behemoth who she guessed was her enemy.

A second of peace passed before she stood up, arm fixed by fading circles of musical staves and notes, expression the very picture of grim determination that softened quickly at the sight of a strangely dressed person.

She would have stabbed him if it weren't for the fact that she lost her Cutlass and that he didn't look like anything she had recently destroyed.

"Uh." She said most intelligently. "Hi?"

She gave Clay an awkward wave and a small smile before she draped her cape around her body and let it fly with a flourish. The once empty ground around her was now filled with a circle of swords and she quickly grabbed the nearest two as she shouted "Behind you!"

Sayaka spun and spun and spun as she threw sword after sword at the weird looking beheaded men charging her position.

[Mundeo]

Rapporan

After listening to the belabored exposition, Missy's gaze slowly drifted to the red portal with a look of longing. "Thank you for that... boring backstory. I think I caught most of that, you want to take over all of reality and you want me to help. I am flattered!"

She went over to the portal and crossed her arms. "So, I can just walk in and start killing things, right?"

Installation 00, Ice Canyon

The Doctor pointed upward, ready to go on about how he couldn't remember him, but quickly faltered. He obviously doesn't recognize him with his new identity. Ducking out of the way of some sudden laser fire, he fixed his bowtie as he said, "I'm the Doctor, remember?"

[The Intergalactic Russian Empire]

Installation 00, Command Center
Bowser and Joker climbed through the portal and into the Command Center. Bowser saw no need to unleash the Subspace Army, but he could control the Shadow Bugs at will to form the troops he wanted, except his Koopas. Joker looked around the room and said, "So, how's about blowing some heroes up?"
Rapporan
"So we get this fancy personal heaven?" asked Drakken, "In exchange for helping take over the world? I'm in!"
"This is the deal of a lifetime!" Frugal said.
"I know. Which is why I will assist in the battle," Monkey Fist replied.
"I'll think about it," Killigan said, then silently pondered for a moment, "I've thought about it. I'm in."
"Sounds great!" Shego said, "but I'd like a signed contract so that we don't get weaseled out of this."

Installation 00, Command Center
Shockwave turned to see newcomers "Unfortunately for you, it's a little too late. Look." he gestured to a window, outside the battle was raging "As you can see, the heroes' moral is faltering, as a matter of fact four of them are routing right now. The battle will be over shortly."

Meanwhile, the kids were slowly falling back "This is a huge fucking disaster, we need to pull out of this shit." Dave nodded and said "Yeah, this was a fucking terrible idea, what with Vriska going all Leroy Jenkins on us and running in with 0 fucking forethought." Jake was backing away while shooting the Kamikazes with two gold pistols "What's with all these headless screaming people with bombs?"

[Osnil]

Installation 00 Command Center
"Well then, why the heck am I here?" roared Bowser.
Joker meanwhile pulled out a bag of popcorn and proceeded to eat it, "Shhhh! I want to hear the show."
Rapporan
"Maybe we can work together, then," suggested Drakken, "I am Doctor Drakken. This is Duff Killigan, Monkey Fist, Frugal Lucre, Senor Senior Sr, and Senor Senior Jr."
"It is a pleasure to meet a fellow villain for the cause of evil," Senior said.
Junior's eyes widened at the beatiful creature nearby. He instantly began flirting with her, "Hello, I am Senor Senior Jr. I am an aspiring popstar. I hope we shall be seeing one another more often."

[The Dark Brotherhood of Deros]

Installation 00 command center
Hades and his army came through the portal, watching the havoc below. "Am i too late to start killing things?" he asked.

Rapporan
Specter Knight listened to the exposition. "I've no need for paradise. or your other rewards, all i wish to do is to fight. to bring about the reckoning of others. i shall join you."
He said, bowing. Finally, he would be able to conquer and destroy, just like he did in the Order.

[Aeternabilis]

Installation 00, Ice Canyon
"Well obviously fucking not!" Karkat screamed as he dodged another round of lazers. "That's generally what people mean when the yell 'who the fuck are you'!"

Clay stumbled backwards, behind the girl and away from the Kamikazes. "Hey there. Holy fuckberries this turned into a shitstorm. We've gotta get the hell out of here before we all become very, very dead!" As Sayaka launched swords at the headless shirtless explosive men, he scanned the battle until he found Jade. "Jade! Teleport us to the desert! We've got to back to that portal!"

"It certainly appears that way," Bivtris said to Hades.

Rapporan
"Of course you can, Mistress. As for the rest of you... if you want a contract, then here you go." Asteraoth said, and he waved his hand. A written-up contract and a pen in Shego's favorite color appeared on a very elaborately designed table. "Sign away."

[Osnil]

Installation 00, Command Center
"Actually, it appears we are," muttered Bowser, "the heroes are already routing. THERE'S NOTHING FOR ME TO DO!"
Joker meanwhile offered Hades a supersize bag of popcorn and said, "You might be a little late, but there's still some popcorn left."
Rapporan
"You've got yourself a deal," Shego said, signing the contract, then offering her hand, "it'll be a pleasure working with you."
"Shego, you just have to be so annoying," Drakken muttered, "he's a fellow villain-he'd never rip us off."
Killigan cleared his throat, "I believe you ripped me off. I agreed to sell something to you, Blue Boy, and you cheated me out of me money."
Monkey Fist facepalmed, "Let's just go."
Another portal appeared, and Loki appeared. "Where am I?" he demanded, "This is not Asgard or Midgard, or any of the other realms."

[Mundeo]

Installation 00, Command Center
"Actually, it appears we are," muttered Bowser, "the heroes are already routing. THERE'S NOTHING FOR ME TO DO!"
Joker meanwhile offered Hades a supersize bag of popcorn and said, "You might be a little late, but there's still some popcorn left."
Rapporan
"You've got yourself a deal," Shego said, signing the contract, then offering her hand, "it'll be a pleasure working with you."
"Shego, you just have to be so annoying," Drakken muttered, "he's a fellow villain-he'd never rip us off."
Killigan cleared his throat, "I believe you ripped me off. I agreed to sell something to you, Blue Boy, and you cheated me out of me money."
Monkey Fist facepalmed, "Let's just go."
Another portal appeared, and Loki appeared. "Where am I?" he demanded, "This is not Asgard or Midgard, or any of the other realms."

Rapporan

Missy turned to the newcomer Loki and sighed. "Welcome to Rapporan. You have been chosen to blah blah blah just jump through this portal and start killing some heroes" she droned in her best impersonation of Asteraoth's voice. "Now, if you escuse me...". She opened her umbrella and lifted it over her head before stepping through the portal.

Installation 00, Command Center

She stepped into the control center and went right to scrutinizing the fellow villains. "Mmhm. A clown, a turtle, and... whatever you're supposed to be" She said as she looked at the Jocker, Bowser, then Hades. With the press of a button she closed her umbrella and clapped her hands loudly. "Chop chop! Less eating more ruthless killing! Which way to the action?"

Meanwhile, on the battlefield, The Doctor was struck with immense confusion, but the truth, or at least what he felt was the truth, quickly came to him. His last memory of the last adventure came to him. All of the events were wiped from existence, only he so far being unharmed. The Trolls he knew no longer exist, and he felt the weight of the realization. This was something else, and at the moment, the heroes are in need of some asistance.

He took a step back and held out his arms, shouting to all of the heroes. "Hey! Where are you all going?"

[Osnil]

Installation 00 Command Center
"It seems that we've arrived too late to do anything," Bowser muttered, watching the screen.
"Cheer up, ol' Turtle-Face!" Joker said, "look at this the funny way. We can eat more popcorn!" He glared rudely at Missy and said, "Quiet in the theater."

[Cybraxia]

Ice Canyon:

Ugh-Zan staggered back from the blast that Sollux fired, but continued to fire. Meanwhile Durge started his flamethrowers and began charging the heroes. Obi-Wan yelled out. "Get away from him. He's too tough to kill." Both Jedi pushed the kamikazes away while the others retreated. Michael called out. "Weren't we going to destroy that fake sun?"

MEANWHILE INSIDE:

As soon as the Condesce caught sight of the Joker, she immediately lunged at him. "Get the fuck outta here. I've had enough of clowns in one lifetime." she said in-between jabs. Wily tried to stop her but it was futile.

[Osnil]

Command Center
Joker's popcorn crashed to the ground and spilled all over. He got up, dusted himself off and said, "Look what you did! And I ran out of free refills for my popcorn! I don't know who you are or what you think I did to you. It was probably funny, anyway." He held up a cyanide pie in one hand and said, "Do you like pies, lady? Because I think they're going to like you." He threw the pie at Condencse and began laughing hysterically.
Bowser looked at the ensuing fight and said to Hades, "Twenty one-ups says that she beats him."

[Cybraxia]

Command Center
Joker's popcorn crashed to the ground and spilled all over. He got up, dusted himself off and said, "Look what you did! And I ran out of free refills for my popcorn! I don't know who you are or what you think I did to you. It was probably funny, anyway." He held up a cyanide pie in one hand and said, "Do you like pies, lady? Because I think they're going to like you." He threw the pie at Condencse and began laughing hysterically.
Bowser looked at the ensuing fight and said to Hades, "Twenty one-ups says that she beats him."

The Condesce ducked and kept jabbing. "Stupid fuckin' juggalos and your stupid fuckin' pies!"

Wily pinched the bridge of his nose. "Look I don't like clowns either but I do-"

The Condesce paused for a brief moment to glare at Wily, scaring him into quietness.

DIO chuckled to himself. "Well isn't this interesting. Already we are fighting amongst ourselves."

[Osnil]

Command Center
"Aren't you a slippery fish!" Joker commented, pulling out his RPG, "Do you like missiles, lady? Because I think they're going to like you." He fired at Condesce, "Come on, not even one smile?"

Bowser approached DIO and said, "The name's Bowser. What's yours?"

[Cybraxia]

Command Center
"Aren't you a slippery fish!" Joker commented, pulling out his RPG, "Do you like missiles, lady? Because I think they're going to like you." He fired at Condesce, "Come on, not even one smile?"

Bowser approached DIO and said, "The name's Bowser. What's yours?"

The Condesce held up her hand and the RPG slowed to a stop. "What with you and your shit likin me? Damn you fuckin' clowns are creepy as fuck?" She launched the RPG back at the Joker.

Meanwhile, Dio ignored Bowser.

[The Intergalactic Russian Empire]

Command Center
"Aren't you a slippery fish!" Joker commented, pulling out his RPG, "Do you like missiles, lady? Because I think they're going to like you." He fired at Condesce, "Come on, not even one smile?"

Bowser approached DIO and said, "The name's Bowser. What's yours?"

The Condesce held up her hand and the RPG slowed to a stop. "What with you and your shit likin me? Damn you fuckin' clowns are creepy as fuck?" She launched the RPG back at the Joker.

Meanwhile, Dio ignored Bowser.

Shockwave turned and fired his hand laser at the rocket, disintegrating it mid-air "You organics and your in-fighting, I'd be disgusted if I had emotions. This fighting is pointless and above all illogical, put aside your petty differences. We must have unity to achieve victory in the coming war."

[Petrokovia]

Abandoned Factory, ?????, Japan

A man walked into a large, dark room, with a shadowy figure sitting in front of several computers.
"Sir, the bountyhunter has not reestablished contact, and we can not call him; We have lost his signal."
"Very well. I suppose I need to take matters into my own hands."
The man stood up, put on a trench coat hanging on the back of his chair, took out a pair of scanners from its pocket, and put them on, too.
"You are in charge of the building until I return."
"Yes, sir!"
Agent A then walked through the halls, until finally stepping out of the building, and walking into an alleyway. He pulled out what would appear to be a rather bulky smartphone, pressed a few buttons on the touch screen, and put it back into his pocket. Before he could turn back around to head out, a large red portal appeared, and sucked him in.

Rapporan

"Where... am I...?"
Agent A took a look around him, at the dystopian world in front of him. He could see a large army marching down the streets, with what appeared to be a bunch of T-90s following closely behind. Everywhere he looked, he could see the color red.
"What fresh hell is this?"

[Cybraxia]

The Condesce held up her hand and the RPG slowed to a stop. "What with you and your shit likin me? Damn you fuckin' clowns are creepy as fuck?" She launched the RPG back at the Joker.

Meanwhile, Dio ignored Bowser.

Shockwave turned and fired his hand laser at the rocket, disintegrating it mid-air "You organics and your in-fighting, I'd be disgusted if I had emotions. This fighting is pointless and above all illogical, put aside your petty differences. We must have unity to achieve victory in the coming war."

"I ain't unitin with no son of a bitch clown. The only unitin he's gonna get is with my trident. 'Sides, all he can do is throw pies and shoot slow as shit rockets. Any asshole can do that shit."

"Empress, please," Wily interrupted. "We've almost got the relay network active. Let's finish here, and then you can fight with him later."

[The Intergalactic Russian Empire]

Shockwave turned and fired his hand laser at the rocket, disintegrating it mid-air "You organics and your in-fighting, I'd be disgusted if I had emotions. This fighting is pointless and above all illogical, put aside your petty differences. We must have unity to achieve victory in the coming war."

"I ain't unitin with no son of a bitch clown. The only unitin he's gonna get is with my trident. 'Sides, all he can do is throw pies and shoot slow as shit rockets. Any asshole can do that shit."

"Empress, please," Wily interrupted. "We've almost got the relay network active. Let's finish here, and then you can fight with him later."

Shockwave internally sighed "I don't care if you're an empress or a goddess or anything inbetween. Do you compute my demands, organics? Now quiet down and observe the battle outside." he turned back around and watched "Hmm, strange, the heroes are pulling back yet I don't see any casualties sustained in combat. They must be pulling out in order to keep from sustaining casualties."

[Apto]

Installation 00, Ice Canyon
Clay stumbled backwards, behind the girl and away from the Kamikazes. "Hey there. Holy fuckberries this turned into a shitstorm. We've gotta get the hell out of here before we all become very, very dead!" As Sayaka launched swords at the headless shirtless explosive men, he scanned the battle until he found Jade. "Jade! Teleport us to the desert! We've got to back to that portal!"

Clay's words fell on deaf ears.

Sayaka may be a student of Mitakihara Middle School but she liked slacking off way too much to be able to get anything significant out of her English Classes. Oh sure, she caught some words and understood them but she was far too busy trying to stay alive to decipher the rest of Clay's sentence. A quick once over the battlefield and the general tone of Clay's words were far more effective in making her understand what he wanted to convey.

Retreat.

"What?!" She screamed in Japanese, face a mash of anger and disgust, as she saw what she guessed to be her allies flee.

Why were they running? Didn't they understand what was at stake here? Countless lives were depending on them! They couldn't afford to lose, they had no right to.

She had no right to.

A small lull in her portion of the battlefield allowed Sayaka to produce a Grief Seed from thin air. She pushed the black object to the Crescent Moon shaped gem at her navel and she instantly felt her mind grow lighter as black waves flowed from her gem into the Grief Seed.

Magic refilled and mind clearer than ever, she saw that at least not everyone was retreating. In fact, someone was charging towards her general direction right now.

Ice Canyon:

Ugh-Zan staggered back from the blast that Sollux fired, but continued to fire. Meanwhile Durge started his flamethrowers and began charging the heroes.

It was the metal man whose armor she damaged.

The Blueberry turned to face him, Cutlass pointed to the ground below before she jumped high up into the air, creating a small cloud of dust as she did so. A platform of musical staves and notes appeared behind Sayaka as she angled herself diagonally. Her feet touched the platform and she propelled herself downwards, completely ignoring the flames that licked her form as it combated her healing magic.

Her sword pulsed with light and she swung her magically reinforced weapon downwards between Durge's shoulder and the base of his neck as her landing cracked the earth around them and produced a torrent of wind that cleared their surroundings of debris.

[Osnil]

Installation 00 Command Center
"I didn't do anything to you," Joker replied, reaching for his canister of Joker gas, "do you like gas, lady, because-oh, never mind!" He opened the canister and threw it in Condensce's direction.
Bowser intently watched, "This is gonna be fun."

[Cybraxia]

Outside in the Ice Canyon:

As soon as Sayaka struck, the snow flew up from the ground, obscuring the immediate surroundings from sight. As it began to settle, she would begin to see Durge's broken form on the ground, armor cracked open from the strike. But... something was off. He didn't move or stir, seemingly dead.

Inside the structure:

"I'm gonna fuckin IMPAL-E this fucka," She telekinetically grabbed the canister and sent it back towards the Joker. She then hefted her double trident and prepared to throw it at the annoying clown.

[Apto]

Outside in the Ice Canyon:

As soon as Sayaka struck, the snow flew up from the ground, obscuring the immediate surroundings from sight. As it began to settle, she would begin to see Durge's broken form on the ground, armor cracked open from the strike. But... something was off. He didn't move or stir, seemingly dead.

Magically reinforced metal crashed against Durge's armor and the satisfying cacophony of armor creaking and breaking filled Sayaka with momentous joy. Her joy turned to unbridled euphoria as she felt the alien's flesh vainly resist her blade. She pushed more effort into her swing and was rewarded when a spray of alien blood coated her from head to toe. A good portion of Durge's chest flew through the air along with his arm and Sayaka jumped away as soon as her Cutlass was free from the alien.

She was so hyped up on adrenaline that she only spared Durge's unmoving body a few seconds before she ran over his corpse and charged a group of approaching Sentiniels.