Elfen High 2: Gotterdammerung

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Ferdinand proceeded to tackle D onto the ground and deliver several punches into his face.

"You insignificant ingrate!" he yelled. "You're an egotistical little fuck, who pretends that he carries the world on his tiny shoulders. But you don't. I smell the caffeine inside of your body."

Ferdinand smirked. "I can't wait until you crash and burn."

D stood perfectly still while Ferdinand hit him, seeming completely indifferent.

"I am not the one who attacked an eleven-year-old because his feelings were hurt," he said simply, "nor do I smell like cheap whiskey and demon blood. I think, perhaps, it would be wise to look at yourself before you criticize others. Glass house, meet stone."

Daisuke gave Crowley his drink, which he gulped down. "So," the wizard asked. "You planning on doing anything about that?"

"I will always help my friends in times of need." the Taka replied. "However, D doesn't seem in danger of being permanently injured from this. And arguably, someone could stretch it out to think he needs it, so...in any case, what do you think the odds of Britain winning the Ashes this year are?"

"Pretty good, I'd say. Australia just hasn't been up to par in recent years."

"Hey!" D said, fumbling to catch Ferdinand's wrist, "Dai! I'm being attacked by an angry drunk with a small dick. Could you help here? I still own twenty-five percent!"

"I'm discussing cricket!" Dai said.

"You're an American." Crowley noted.

"I have British permanent residency!" Daisuke sighed, grabbing Ferdinand and pulling the vampire off. "He's a dumbass with social skills. Probably best not to irritate him. Besides, he has twenty five percent of my company's stock, so I'd rather keep him at the moment."

[Nationstatelandsville]

D stood perfectly still while Ferdinand hit him, seeming completely indifferent.

"I am not the one who attacked an eleven-year-old because his feelings were hurt," he said simply, "nor do I smell like cheap whiskey and demon blood. I think, perhaps, it would be wise to look at yourself before you criticize others. Glass house, meet stone."


"Hey!" D said, fumbling to catch Ferdinand's wrist, "Dai! I'm being attacked by an angry drunk with a small dick. Could you help here? I still own twenty-five percent!"

"I'm discussing cricket!" Dai said.

"You're an American." Crowley noted.

"I have British permanent residency!" Daisuke sighed, grabbing Ferdinand and pulling the vampire off. "He's a dumbass with social skills. Probably best not to irritate him. Besides, he has twenty five percent of my company's stock, so I'd rather keep him at the moment."

"I am also eleven!" D shouted, grabbing his now very thoroughly broken nose, "Isn't violence on children something normal people have a problem with?"

He looked down on the stain of blood on his palm, "Oh, shit. I hope Mom doesn't find out about this. I don't want to have to pay for another new Big Ben."

[Nude East Ireland]

D stood perfectly still while Ferdinand hit him, seeming completely indifferent.

"I am not the one who attacked an eleven-year-old because his feelings were hurt," he said simply, "nor do I smell like cheap whiskey and demon blood. I think, perhaps, it would be wise to look at yourself before you criticize others. Glass house, meet stone."


"Hey!" D said, fumbling to catch Ferdinand's wrist, "Dai! I'm being attacked by an angry drunk with a small dick. Could you help here? I still own twenty-five percent!"

"I'm discussing cricket!" Dai said.

"You're an American." Crowley noted.

"I have British permanent residency!" Daisuke sighed, grabbing Ferdinand and pulling the vampire off. "He's a dumbass with social skills. Probably best not to irritate him. Besides, he has twenty five percent of my company's stock, so I'd rather keep him at the moment."

Ferdinand glared at Dai, and then looked at Crowley.

"Find me when you're done with these two," he said, igniting his lightsaber and slashing through several demons on his way to the door. When he reached the door, he simply waved his hand and sent it off of the hinges and into the street. He then proceeded outside, probably on yet another drunken rampage.

[Nationstatelandsville]

"I'm discussing cricket!" Dai said.

"You're an American." Crowley noted.

"I have British permanent residency!" Daisuke sighed, grabbing Ferdinand and pulling the vampire off. "He's a dumbass with social skills. Probably best not to irritate him. Besides, he has twenty five percent of my company's stock, so I'd rather keep him at the moment."

Ferdinand glared at Dai, and then looked at Crowley.

"Find me when you're done with these two," he said, igniting his lightsaber and slashing through several demons on his way to the door. When he reached the door, he simply waved his hand and sent it off of the hinges and into the street. He then proceeded outside, probably on yet another drunken rampage.

"Nice guy," D remarked, "Tell me, are you from one of those bullshit Star Trek universes were all of the good guys are assholes with beards?"

---

There was a stirring in Rosalind's form. Her eyes tore open and she bolted up, crying out in pain.

"Rosie!" Megan exclaimed, immediately enveloping her in a massive hug. Hot tears ran down Rosalind's cheeks as Megan ran her fingers through her hair.

"Rosie," Megan whispered, "what's wrong?"

"Where is Aziraphale?" Rosalind demanded, squirming out of her mother's grip, "Where is he?!"

---

There was a thunderstorm in Maseru.

The Taka-Jameson headquarters, the mighty Tower of Babel, was still the tallest building in all of Lesotho, still the throne of its kings. So very arrogant, wasn't it? It dared to climb into the sky, defile the perfection of Heaven with its human sin? Lord Uriel would not stand for it - the Tower would be leveled, in due time.

The Android Leader stood on the edge of the roof, overlooking the idle stream of Basotho below, mulling about in their false idol of a city. They were a diseased people, infected by the moral leprosy of the West. They defied the will of God, and for that, they would burn.

Did he really strive, once, to defend all of this? Had he stood in this exact place and prepared to kill himself because he was not like these heathens? Such was the danger of thought, but Lord Uriel had saved him from that danger. He was safe in his conformity, protected by assimilation.

He drew one of the insects - tools of God and agents of salvation - from his being and held it in the air, inspecting it.

"On Earth, as it is in Heaven."

He suddenly fell through the roof, into a crowded meeting room below. The Taka-Jameson board - excluding, of course, their principal shareholders - looked up in surprise. A baker's dozen of old men who had been professionally rich all their lives, mainly from the US and the UK, and all as white and Christian as one could be, sputtered in surprise.

"Gentlemen," the Android Leader nodded, grabbing one of the men by the throat, "now is come salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of his Christ."

The Leader rammed the insect down into the shareholder's throat.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

So let's skip ahead some, to get the stalled plot back into the good times.

Currently, it was Halloween. To celebrate Halloween, Aleister Crowley had decided to have a break from all "classes" and to have a party. It would be a nice, casual, fun little party. With a significant ulterior motive of getting into Megan's pants and Megan herself.

Fae Moon Subplot set their equipment up on the side, getting ready to play as Crowley opened up the auditorium/gymnasium to all who entered. It now looked like a brilliant setup for a party, with a disco ball, orange curtains, a band, drinks, drugs, infinite space and fuck it, use your imaginations.

Crowley sat at the drinks table, perfectly aware the Irish students and staff would be drawn to here sooner rather than later. He was also aware that most Elfen Highers would be coming down here to relax. This would be good for him as well. Just some time to sit down, take a break and bang. He had missed doing that, after all.

[Astrolinium]

Caspian Lawrence was 20 years old or whatever. However old he was before, because he was still here from the last time.
He was, for once, not dressed in his usual attire, as this was a costume party.
He was, however, still unmistakably trying to imitate the Doctor. It's merely that this time, he was specifically imitating Four rather than a big mish-mash of all of them. He was wearing grey pants and fancy shoes. He had on a rather fancy-looking shirt, which was yellow and checkered, and he had a red... tie sort of thingy on. Over it, however, was a large grey coat with lots of pockets, and he had a ridiculously long scarf wrapped around his neck in autumnal colors. On his head was big, floppy brown hat.

Grinning madly, although failing to get the 'i have far too many teeth for my mouth, wouldn't you please take a few' grin for which Tom Baker had become famous, he walked into the gymnasium and said, "Ah, I love Halloween. Such a fun day."

---

Eric was a bit miffed that the band had not been asked to play at the party, but he supposed it wasn't that big a deal -- he would have said no anyway, as he was sure his students would have moaned and groaned if they hadn't been able to actually attend. So he supposed it was all for the best as he tied the knot around Parnell's neck. He was tying a knot around Parnell's neck because his husband was wearing a cape. The two were going to the party as a Superman and Batman. Parnell was Superman and Eric was Batman.

Eric stood back and grinned at Parnell, looking him over. He was wearing a fairly traditional costume -- blue, red, big S on the chest, nice red cape -- and he'd dyed his normal golden blond hair black for the occasion. Eric himself was going as the version of Batman from his childhood; the Christian Bale one. His costume was actually pretty decently convincing, although it was obviously not real.

Putting on -- and largely failing at -- a gravelly voice, Eric said, "I am the night. I am the darkness. I am the Batman."

Parnell giggled and said, "You're a very cute Batman, too."

"Aw, Parnell, I'm supposed to be intimidating, not cute."

The two laughed and Eric kissed Parnell. It looked like they might not be getting to the party on time after all.

---

Fluffy jumped up onto one of his brothers. He said, "Come on, guys, let's go to the party! I bet there'll be treats and maybe someone will drop some food!"

He panted. The adorable little puppy-wuppy was dressed in only a black vampire cape and had had tiny fangs affixed to two of his front teeth. He cut quite the adorable sight.

[Nude East Ireland]

"He's ready," said the voice of an older German man.

"I want to be sure. He is the key to our plan. I don't want to worry you, Doctor, but if he fails..."

"He won't," the German man replied. "He has passed every test we have laid out for him. He is in perfect condition."

There was a sigh. "Very well, Doctor. Begin the realignment process."

Wwwwwaaaaaaaaaaa - chshhhhhhhhh - yes, that was an adequate sound.

Eraldo's vision quickly brightened, and then darkened. He felt his restraints loosen. There was the sound of a struggle, but he couldn't see anything. All he could feel was his body flailing about, attacking men and hitting into objects. Finally he hid the ground in a thud.

He was breathing heavily. He saw the lights on the ceiling, and quickly looked around the dull, white laboratory. Beakers filled the tables, pumping liquids of all kinds through plastic tubes. Papers and folders were neatly piled on two desks on the far side of the room. In the centre was a large, metal bed with leather straps where the wrists, ankles, waist, and head should be placed.

Lying around him were unconscious - or perhaps dead - security officers. What the fuck happened? Where am I? What time is it?

These questions would have to be answered later, because the large metal door behind him was being banged on. It was locked, and clearly there were people who wanted to get inside.

There must be a way out.

And suddenly there was. It was like a fucking miracle; like an Angel flying down from Heaven to save him. Well, debatably. In fact, it was the opening of a portal next to him. Eraldo looked up at a man and women dressed in all-black uniforms made of kevlar - or the current equivalent. The woman ran over to the door, and began placing several small discs on each corner, while the man knelt down and attached a gas mask-like device over Eraldo's mouth and nose.

"Charges set!" the woman yelled, as she ran to the other side of Eraldo and helped the man bring the detective to his feet. Eraldo looked at the two, as his breathing began to slow down. "What the fuck is happening!?" he demanded. The two looked at each other, and then him.

"We'll explain in a minute," the woman replied. Before Erlado could reply, they pulled him into the portal with them. It quickly shut behind them, just as the door was kicked in - and then abruptly exploded as the charges went off.

Eraldo broke free from the grip of the two, and removed his mask.

"Alright, what the fuck is happening?" he demanded once more.

"A rescue mission," replied a Russian man. The Russian approached Eraldo, and nodded. "General Shank, commander of Ghost Battalion. This is my headquarters in Aberdeen. Are you alright, Mr. Coil? You've been missing for quite some time."

"Missing? Where have I been? What's the date?"

"The date is October 31. That is, however, the good news. The bad news is that you've been held in a Thule outpost in Uzbekistan since that fiasco on the Moon. It took a long time, but we finally found you." Shank smiled, and patted Eraldo on the shoulder.

"Well... where do I go now?"

Shank shrugged. "Up to you. I'll hold off on sending my report to General Sanchez until you make up your mind. He'll want to find out what you know of the Thule. I only see three options at the moment; you can stay with the ISSR and help us crack down on the Thule a bit faster, head to Elfen High and tell Mr. Crowley that you're safe, or go out on your own."

"Elfen High," Eraldo replied.

"Very well." Shank nodded to the man and woman who helped Eraldo through the portal. "Agents Downey and Free will escort you to Elfen High."

Shank began walking away, then quickly hopped onto a passing gunship as it flew through the hangar. Did I mention that they were in a hangar?

Eraldo turned back to the agents, who had de-masked. The man smiled. "Agent Robert Downey, III," he replied. "I fought with some of your fellow Elfen Highers in Dover. Nice to meet you, sir."

Eraldo nodded. "Yeah, sure. Uh, where are we heading back to Elfen High?"

"Soon," the woman replied. She had long black hair, piercing dark blue eyes, and skin smooth it made the very concept of 'smooth' jealous. She smiled, which only caused Downey to sweat a bit more.

"Vanessa Free," she said, outstretching her hand to Eraldo.

The detective shook it and smiled. "Uh, hey there. You know, I know of a great restaurant in Aberdeen. Maybe we should head there some time?"

Vanessa giggled. "Maybe," she replied. "So, let's all get some rest before we head back through a portal."

"Uh, sure Vanessa. Whatever you say," the two men said in unison.

---

And because I'm too lazy to type any more, Eraldo found himself back in Elfen High several minutes later. He stumbled into a waiter, knocking him and a tray of finger foods onto the floor. He quickly ran away, stumbling and falling. He planted his face into, conveniently, Crowley's lap.

[Nationstatelandsville]

"My theory is thus," D said, as the intern placed the steel diadem over the other Crowley's head. It was a ring of metal with copper wires intertwined around it. Several of the wires branched off and touched Crowley, where they were then taped down with gauze over several, pre-selected neural points.

"Magic is energy," he continued,"A whole new spectrum of it we don't understand, but energy nonetheless. It can be channeled and controlled psychically, take on the appearance and characteristics of other forms of energy, but it remains in its own unique spectrum. I hypothesize that, just like the electromagnetic spectrum, the differing forms of the magic spectrum are based upon the differing wavelengths of magic energy. In other words, different 'spells', as it were, are the result of different wavelengths and their subsequent mutation into different physical effects."

A piece of wood - exactly a foot thick, a foot wide, and a foot tall - was placed in front of Crowley.

"So, here's the set-up," D said, "You're going to attempt to change the basic genetic sequence of this test subject and initiate a resultant change in all of its cells to replicate the change that Subject: Ro undergoes. The psychopgraph will handle the rest."

D gestured to the the crown, then to the machine it was attached to. It somewhat resembled a seismograph - a roll of paper was attached to a gray box, similar in its internal workings to a computer, a pen held stationary over it by a metal arm.

"The diadem picks up the electric output from your brain," D explained, "and carries it across the wires into the box. The box deciphers the neural signals based on data we have collected in previous experiments, creating the specific wavelength on the magic spectrum of your 'spell'. We will then invoke Subject: Ro's change and test the magic emitted there, to see if it matches your spell. If it does, you will attempt to undo the spell on Subject: Ro. To test that you can do this, you will also undo the change on the subject.

Basically, remotely change the log's DNA, then, from there, change the log. Do this in such a way, if possible, that will leave no trace of your change in the log's genetics, but would allow you to change the log at will without repeating the spell. I believe wizards refer to this as a 'curse'? We'll handle it from there."

He nodded at Daisuke, "Everyone ready?"

---

Megan - dressed in a witch's costume that showed off her legs and breasts to a ridiculous extent for a middle-aged woman - tapped her fingers against the wall impatiently. What was taking Rosalind so long?

Giving up, she forced the girl's door open. Not at all to her mother's surprise, Rosalind was gone.

"Fuck!" Megan swore - two months of planning this party, two months of convincing Rosalind to go, for nothing.

She removed her phone from her purse and called Sanchez.

"Rick?" she said, "Rosie's gone, won't go to the party. I need a fucking drink. Come over."

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Crowley pushed Eraldo off his lap. "What the hell do you want?" he asked a bit rudely, before sighing. "Sorry about that. In any case, what are you here for? Must be a serious issue of some sort-"

Then Rick Sanchez walked in, Megan Jameson at his side as he smiled mockingly at Crowley. Crowley was holding a glass of wine in his hand, which was immediately smashed into a hundred pieces. The glass shards disintegrated shortly afterwards. "Fuck him." Crowley growled to himself. Then he turned to Eraldo, wearing a fake smile. "What do you need?"

---

Suddenly, Eric and Parnell saw someone teleporting in front of them. A man who looked like an elephant. "Hey, which one of you cunts did I last get help from?"

---

Daisuke nodded. "Ready, D. This could be dangerous though. Then again, everything can."

Crowley grinned. "The danger makes it fun, eh?" he asked. He took a breath, charging the energy in his hands.

"Of course," Daisuke remarked. "This Crowley is a man I'm willing to try a dangerous experiment on."

[Nude East Ireland]

Crowley pushed Eraldo off his lap. "What the hell do you want?" he asked a bit rudely, before sighing. "Sorry about that. In any case, what are you here for? Must be a serious issue of some sort-"

Then Rick Sanchez walked in, Megan Jameson at his side as he smiled mockingly at Crowley. Crowley was holding a glass of wine in his hand, which was immediately smashed into a hundred pieces. The glass shards disintegrated shortly afterwards. "Fuck him." Crowley growled to himself. Then he turned to Eraldo, wearing a fake smile. "What do you need?"

"I... I've been missing for a while. The Thule held me captive since the fight on the Moon."

Eraldo got up and sighed. "Didn't you fucking know this?"

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Crowley pushed Eraldo off his lap. "What the hell do you want?" he asked a bit rudely, before sighing. "Sorry about that. In any case, what are you here for? Must be a serious issue of some sort-"

Then Rick Sanchez walked in, Megan Jameson at his side as he smiled mockingly at Crowley. Crowley was holding a glass of wine in his hand, which was immediately smashed into a hundred pieces. The glass shards disintegrated shortly afterwards. "Fuck him." Crowley growled to himself. Then he turned to Eraldo, wearing a fake smile. "What do you need?"

"I... I've been missing for a while. The Thule held me captive since the fight on the Moon."

Eraldo got up and sighed. "Didn't you fucking know this?"

"Yes. Sorry. I was busy with breasts."

As a fellow Crowley, Eraldo would completely understand.

[Nationstatelandsville]

Crowley pushed Eraldo off his lap. "What the hell do you want?" he asked a bit rudely, before sighing. "Sorry about that. In any case, what are you here for? Must be a serious issue of some sort-"

Then Rick Sanchez walked in, Megan Jameson at his side as he smiled mockingly at Crowley. Crowley was holding a glass of wine in his hand, which was immediately smashed into a hundred pieces. The glass shards disintegrated shortly afterwards. "Fuck him." Crowley growled to himself. Then he turned to Eraldo, wearing a fake smile. "What do you need?"

Megan grabbed a random student and pulled him over.

"You," she said, "where the hell is the beer?"

Daisuke nodded. "Ready, D. This could be dangerous though. Then again, everything can."

Crowley grinned. "The danger makes it fun, eh?" he asked. He took a breath, charging the energy in his hands.

"Of course," Daisuke remarked. "This Crowley is a man I'm willing to try a dangerous experiment on."

D flipped a switch on the psychograph, the arm moving the pen dragging it in a straight line for a few seconds, before beginning to sketch out short, sharp spikes.

"That would be the gathering of the energy in Crowley's body," D noted, removing a red pen from his shirt-pocket; he was dressed in a blue polo shirt and jeans, the nicest clothes he owned. Big experiments were the only occasions he dressed for, save board meetings, and he was rarely invited to any of those.

Secretly, he doubted there would be many of them anymore. Did Dai know about the stock dip over the past two month's? It turned out that few enjoyed the idea of investing in a company where thirteen primary stockholders mysteriously disappear - if they had been cautious about investing a company with ties to Elfen High before, and they had been, they now had reason to be.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Crowley pushed Eraldo off his lap. "What the hell do you want?" he asked a bit rudely, before sighing. "Sorry about that. In any case, what are you here for? Must be a serious issue of some sort-"

Then Rick Sanchez walked in, Megan Jameson at his side as he smiled mockingly at Crowley. Crowley was holding a glass of wine in his hand, which was immediately smashed into a hundred pieces. The glass shards disintegrated shortly afterwards. "Fuck him." Crowley growled to himself. Then he turned to Eraldo, wearing a fake smile. "What do you need?"

Megan grabbed a random student and pulled him over.

"You," she said, "where the hell is the beer?"

Daisuke nodded. "Ready, D. This could be dangerous though. Then again, everything can."

Crowley grinned. "The danger makes it fun, eh?" he asked. He took a breath, charging the energy in his hands.

"Of course," Daisuke remarked. "This Crowley is a man I'm willing to try a dangerous experiment on."

D flipped a switch on the psychograph, the arm moving the pen dragging it in a straight line for a few seconds, before beginning to sketch out short, sharp spikes.

"That would be the gathering of the energy in Crowley's body," D noted, removing a red pen from his shirt-pocket; he was dressed in a blue polo shirt and jeans, the nicest clothes he owned. Big experiments were the only occasions he dressed for, save board meetings, and he was rarely invited to any of those.

Secretly, he doubted there would be many of them anymore. Did Dai know about the stock dip over the past two month's? It turned out that few enjoyed the idea of investing in a company where thirteen primary stockholders mysteriously disappear - if they had been cautious about investing a company with ties to Elfen High before, and they had been, they now had reason to be.

The student ended up looking at the same thing Crowley had been busy with, before realising this was likely to lead to his death. Instead, he just gestured vaguely at the table where Crowley and Eraldo were talking.

---

Crowley proceeded to change the log's DNA into whatever way was previously decided. I'm either confused or I forgot, so...

[Nude East Ireland]

"I... I've been missing for a while. The Thule held me captive since the fight on the Moon."

Eraldo got up and sighed. "Didn't you fucking know this?"

"Yes. Sorry. I was busy with breasts."

As a fellow Crowley, Eraldo would completely understand.

"Oh, of course," Eraldo replied. "I completely understand."

He sighed. "I'll go find the Colonel. We'll get you once you're done with those breasts - well, if you're done with those breasts."

[Nightkill the Emperor]

"Yes. Sorry. I was busy with breasts."

As a fellow Crowley, Eraldo would completely understand.

"Oh, of course," Eraldo replied. "I completely understand."

He sighed. "I'll go find the Colonel. We'll get you once you're done with those breasts - well, if you're done with those breasts."

"No, no, it's fine. Go get him, then we can chat."

[Astrolinium]

Parnell broke off the kiss and stared at the elephant man.

Parnell said, "You're that Ganesh, fellow, right? Was that the Hades thing?"

Eric said, "Oh, no, we are not doing that again. No, no, no, no, no."

[Nude East Ireland]

"Oh, of course," Eraldo replied. "I completely understand."

He sighed. "I'll go find the Colonel. We'll get you once you're done with those breasts - well, if you're done with those breasts."

"No, no, it's fine. Go get him, then we can chat."

"Alright," Eraldo replied.

Then he left, and that's my post because lazy.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Parnell broke off the kiss and stared at the elephant man.

Parnell said, "You're that Ganesh, fellow, right? Was that the Hades thing?"

Eric said, "Oh, no, we are not doing that again. No, no, no, no, no."

"Too late." Ganesh said with a sort of false cheerfulness. "Look, we have a bit of a situation developing and I need a ragtag team of adventurers to join me once more. That includes one of you guys. I'll get a few more people in a short bit, but pick one of you to come on and join me on fighting a monster from beyond existence. You ready?"

[Nationstatelandsville]

The student ended up looking at the same thing Crowley had been busy with, before realising this was likely to lead to his death. Instead, he just gestured vaguely at the table where Crowley and Eraldo were talking.

"Thank you," Megan nodded, before smacking the student across the face, "Oh, and you failed your ecology test. What the fucking fuck is wrong with you? It's ecology. It's a science invented specifically to pacify screaming five-year-olds."

Megan was still, at her heart, a proud neurologist.

She waltzed up to the alcohol, turning her head from Crowley and ignoring him. Aleister Crowley was her boss, but he was also an ecologist (screaming five-year-old) with poor impulse control. For the past ten years, he had been attempting on and off, to fuck her. It had been creepy at first, then irksome, and now just pathetic. She did her best to avoid him.

Grabbing beer - not a beer, just beer - she glanced over at Sanchez, "You want anything?"

Crowley proceeded to change the log's DNA into whatever way was previously decided. I'm either confused or I forgot, so...

The log immediately turned a vivid shade of purple.

Now, the question the good little reader in my head is asking is this - "But how could changing the genetics of the log instantly change its color? DNA only codes for the proteins produced, and the log is displaying an unnaturally rapid rate of protein synthesis."

The answer, of course, is fuck you, magic.

The pen jumped, the waves becoming longer, rounder, and further apart. D made a mark with the red pen, separating the waves generated by the energy harvest and the waves generated by the spell itself.

"Now return the log to its original state," D said, "but leave it enchanted, so that you can trigger the change at will, without having to replicate the spell."

Fluffy jumped up onto one of his brothers. He said, "Come on, guys, let's go to the party! I bet there'll be treats and maybe someone will drop some food!"

He panted. The adorable little puppy-wuppy was dressed in only a black vampire cape and had had tiny fangs affixed to two of his front teeth. He cut quite the adorable sight.

Bingo crawled out from underneath Fluffy and let out an unholy cry that stripped all nearby virgins of their capacity for love.

"SIMPERING BEAST!" Bingo roared, "THOUGH WE SHARED MORTAL WOMB, DO NOT THINK WE BROTHERS! WE ARE BOUND IN HARVEST AND FLESH, BUT NOT IN SOUL!"

Bingo, of course, was dressed as himself - the existential dread he invoked in the sane and moral satiated his hunger for fear, and his living garb was already a mask for his true being.

"THIS IS THE EVE OF THE ALL-HALLOW!" he barked, "A NIGHT OF SHADOW! I THINK THIS GOOD!"

[Astrolinium]

Parnell broke off the kiss and stared at the elephant man.

Parnell said, "You're that Ganesh, fellow, right? Was that the Hades thing?"

Eric said, "Oh, no, we are not doing that again. No, no, no, no, no."

"Too late." Ganesh said with a sort of false cheerfulness. "Look, we have a bit of a situation developing and I need a ragtag team of adventurers to join me once more. That includes one of you guys. I'll get a few more people in a short bit, but pick one of you to come on and join me on fighting a monster from beyond existence. You ready?"

The two looked at each other.

Eric said, "You're not going."

Parnell frowned. "Eric, you're always the one in harm's way. Come on. Let me be the Superman for once."

Eric shook his head. "No, it's not a question, Parnell, I'm the higher-level magic user here, and I'm not risking losing you."

Parnell put a hand on each of his husband's shoulder. "Look, Eric. I can handle it, I'm sure. I'm not some kind of helpless weakling. I'll be fine."

There is an expression people get on their face when they're really bothered by something. Sort of a frowny, brow-furrowy, blinky sort of thing. Eric had that on his face right now.

Angrily, Eric said, "No."

Parnell took one of Eric's hands in one of his own, resting the other on his husband's cheek. "I'm going," he said.

"No, you are not. Do not go."

Parnell smiled and walked over towards Ganesh.

"Parnell! Look at me! I won't let you do this!"

Parnell looked back at Eric and said, "Come on, don't you think you're overreacting a bit? You always overreact, sweetheart. It won't be that bad."

Fluffy jumped up onto one of his brothers. He said, "Come on, guys, let's go to the party! I bet there'll be treats and maybe someone will drop some food!"

He panted. The adorable little puppy-wuppy was dressed in only a black vampire cape and had had tiny fangs affixed to two of his front teeth. He cut quite the adorable sight.

Bingo crawled out from underneath Fluffy and let out an unholy cry that stripped all nearby virgins of their capacity for love.

"SIMPERING BEAST!" Bingo roared, "THOUGH WE SHARED MORTAL WOMB, DO NOT THINK WE BROTHERS! WE ARE BOUND IN HARVEST AND FLESH, BUT NOT IN SOUL!"

Bingo, of course, was dressed as himself - the existential dread he invoked in the sane and moral satiated his hunger for fear, and his living garb was already a mask for his true being.

"THIS IS THE EVE OF THE ALL-HALLOW!" he barked, "A NIGHT OF SHADOW! I THINK THIS GOOD!"

Fluffy panted and growled in an adorable way. "And maybe someone will drop some food!" he shouted again. If he could grin, he would be grinning, but he merely settled for wagging his tail.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

The student ended up looking at the same thing Crowley had been busy with, before realising this was likely to lead to his death. Instead, he just gestured vaguely at the table where Crowley and Eraldo were talking.

"Thank you," Megan nodded, before smacking the student across the face, "Oh, and you failed your ecology test. What the fucking fuck is wrong with you? It's ecology. It's a science invented specifically to pacify screaming five-year-olds."

Megan was still, at her heart, a proud neurologist.

She waltzed up to the alcohol, turning her head from Crowley and ignoring him. Aleister Crowley was her boss, but he was also an ecologist (screaming five-year-old) with poor impulse control. For the past ten years, he had been attempting on and off, to fuck her. It had been creepy at first, then irksome, and now just pathetic. She did her best to avoid him.

Grabbing beer - not a beer, just beer - she glanced over at Sanchez, "You want anything?"

Crowley proceeded to change the log's DNA into whatever way was previously decided. I'm either confused or I forgot, so...

The log immediately turned a vivid shade of purple.

Now, the question the good little reader in my head is asking is this - "But how could changing the genetics of the log instantly change its color? DNA only codes for the proteins produced, and the log is displaying an unnaturally rapid rate of protein synthesis."

The answer, of course, is fuck you, magic.

The pen jumped, the waves becoming longer, rounder, and further apart. D made a mark with the red pen, separating the waves generated by the energy harvest and the waves generated by the spell itself.

"Now return the log to its original state," D said, "but leave it enchanted, so that you can trigger the change at will, without having to replicate the spell."

Fluffy jumped up onto one of his brothers. He said, "Come on, guys, let's go to the party! I bet there'll be treats and maybe someone will drop some food!"

He panted. The adorable little puppy-wuppy was dressed in only a black vampire cape and had had tiny fangs affixed to two of his front teeth. He cut quite the adorable sight.

Bingo crawled out from underneath Fluffy and let out an unholy cry that stripped all nearby virgins of their capacity for love.

"SIMPERING BEAST!" Bingo roared, "THOUGH WE SHARED MORTAL WOMB, DO NOT THINK WE BROTHERS! WE ARE BOUND IN HARVEST AND FLESH, BUT NOT IN SOUL!"

Bingo, of course, was dressed as himself - the existential dread he invoked in the sane and moral satiated his hunger for fear, and his living garb was already a mask for his true being.

"THIS IS THE EVE OF THE ALL-HALLOW!" he barked, "A NIGHT OF SHADOW! I THINK THIS GOOD!"

Sanchez gave a shrug. "I'll have some."

Crowley held beer in his hands as well, chugging it down. "Yeah, yeah, Spic, you can try to drink the beer. But you're in a European school now. I'm a Brit- there is no way you can beat me."

"Is that a challenge, Aleister?" Sanchez asked, chugging down a few glasses before feeling a bit woozy. Crowley and Megan weren't even slightly dizzy.

---

The other Crowley rolled his eyes. "Simple job." he said, changing the log back to normal. Then back to purple, back to normal, back to purple, back to normal.

Suddenly jazz music started up, the hat grew hands, put on a top hat, got a cane and started dancing.

[Nude East Ireland]

The Colonel had gone as a stereotypical Jew, with a big fake nose held on by string and a yamaka with a curled wig underneath it. He sighed, and sipped his punch. He had been focusing on the research that he and Eraldo had been working on. Tonight was supposed to be relaxing - but how the fuck could he be relaxed if he didn't know how to be?

He thought back to his early years - before the Great War. He remembered growing up in a rural farmhouse, doing normal kid things. When the war came, he felt a nationalist sense of pride, which pushed him to join. Perhaps it was a mistake. He came out of the war shell-shocked and without legs.

He sighed once more, and finished off his drink. "Fuck," he muttered.

Then he left the room.

---

Slowly he opened and then closed his door. Crowley provided him with a room, which was nice enough. He sighed, removing his yamaka, wig, and nose and tossing them onto the floor.

"Colonel."

The Colonel looked around. It was dark, but eventually his eyes focussed on Eraldo, who was sitting at the table near the window. The Colonel ran over to Eraldo and grabbed him. "Eraldo? Fucking shit, you're alive?"

"Yes," the detective replied. "The Thule captured me, but I got rescued by the ISSR just a little while ago. It was either wait until Sanchez interrogated me, or come to Elfen High."

"Well, shit. I was busy looking for you." The Colonel got up and got Eraldo a glass of water. When he returned, he also had a vanilla-coloured folder with him.

"This is some new information on the Thule," he continued, sitting down opposite Eraldo and opening the folder. "Prototype weaponry and the possible location of a magitech facility where they've been creating weapons and training non-human soldiers."

"Interesting..."

"Indeed," the Colonel replied. He sighed. "I'm glad the ISSR found you. Otherwise I'd be giving this information to them. Not that I mind, but they'd likely throw me in prison. I was a Thule once, after all."

Eraldo twitched. "Yes, once."

The Colonel looked at Eraldo for a moment. "What's with the tone?"

Eraldo stood up and began walking to the kitchen. "What tone? I didn't mean to have one..."

The Colonel shrugged, and turned back to the folder. "Well, alright... anyways..."

Suddenly he felt a cold metal against the back of his neck. The Colonel froze and his eyes darted around. "Eraldo? What are you-"

"Shut up," Eraldo replied. "You're of no concern to us any more."

"Us?"

Eraldo twitched, and then jammed the knife into the Colonel's neck. He pulled upward, slashing through the Colonel's skull and into his brain. The knife became lodged in the back of his head. Eraldo removed a lighter from the Colonel's pocket and lit the folder ablaze.

He grabbed the knife and ripped it out of the Colonel's head, allowing the lifeless body to dangle over the chair. Eraldo slashed his arm, causing blood to drip out. He started walking in a very specific pattern, muttering in an ancient Nordic language.

Several minutes passed, until finally a Black Sun had been drawn into the ground with Eraldo's blood. The detective was as pale as the moon, and collapsed once his muttering was finished.

It was silent moment.

Rhythmic thumping began. The room was shaking slightly. The thumping began to increase. And the seal began to glow with a hue of dark blue.

Suddenly, blue light began to emerge from the seal, illuminating the room. Armoured demons armed with machine guns emerged from the light, and immediately went to work securing the area. Following a number of them were humans; specifically, armoured humans carrying flamethrowers, gatling guns, and laser weaponry.

A man in a black trench coat and fedora stepped out of the portal, and looked around the room. A group of humans assembled in a line, all standing straight despite their heavy weaponry. The man stopped in front of them. "Secure the main courtyard and await the engineering team," he ordered. "Kill any and all who stand in your way."

One of the humans stepped out of the line and gave a goose-step salute. "You heard the Colonel, men! Move out!"

Meanwhile, humans emerging from the portal blasted through the window with their explosives, before blasting themselves out of the new opening with their jetpacks.

The new Colonel blinked, and was greeted by the Damien Seward clone in a Skype-like video chat.

"We are moving in swiftly, my Fuhrer. I've sent a team to secure the main courtyard as you have ordered."

The clone nodded. "Very good, Colonel. You've surpassed your predecessor already. And speaking of him..."

"He is dead, my Fuhrer. Along with the detective."

"Excellent. Let's make this a Halloween that the world will never forget."

[Nationstatelandsville]

Sanchez gave a shrug. "I'll have some."

Crowley held beer in his hands as well, chugging it down. "Yeah, yeah, Spic, you can try to drink the beer. But you're in a European school now. I'm a Brit- there is no way you can beat me."

"Is that a challenge, Aleister?" Sanchez asked, chugging down a few glasses before feeling a bit woozy. Crowley and Megan weren't even slightly dizzy.

"i am not having a 'challenge' with you, Crowley," Megan said, downing another beer, "That would be stupid and immature. I just want to be drunk and have a higher tolerance for alcohol than you."

She swallowed another in a single gulp. Megan did not drink beer from a can, it is worth noting. Cans were for Americans. Megan drank beer from a pewter stein as comically large as Polarbeard's ego, handcrafted in the Black Forest by a blind old man with seven fingers in 1827, engraved with the Jameson family crest (a bear getting punched in the dick on top of a shield made of fire - Lewis designed it) and her name.

How did Lewis get a man who died in 1830 to make a stein with Megan's name? Fucking bears, that's how.

"That's just genetics," she added.

Fluffy panted and growled in an adorable way. "And maybe someone will drop some food!" he shouted again. If he could grin, he would be grinning, but he merely settled for wagging his tail.

"I CONSUME ONLY VIRTUE AND JOY," Bingo responded, "AND ORPHAN CHILDREN. THEY ARE NOT ORPHANS WHEN THE MEAL BEGINS."

[Astrolinium]

Fluffy panted and growled in an adorable way. "And maybe someone will drop some food!" he shouted again. If he could grin, he would be grinning, but he merely settled for wagging his tail.

"I CONSUME ONLY VIRTUE AND JOY," Bingo responded, "AND ORPHAN CHILDREN. THEY ARE NOT ORPHANS WHEN THE MEAL BEGINS."

Fluffy nudged Bingo and said, "Come on, Bingo, don't be such a doody-head."

[Nationstatelandsville]

"I CONSUME ONLY VIRTUE AND JOY," Bingo responded, "AND ORPHAN CHILDREN. THEY ARE NOT ORPHANS WHEN THE MEAL BEGINS."

Fluffy nudged Bingo and said, "Come on, Bingo, don't be such a doody-head."

"I SHALL PLAY YOUR LARYNX LIKE A HARP-STRING, PLAYING OUT A SONG OF PAIN AND DESOLATION FOR CENTURIES!" Bingo cried, falling into a a crouch, where his front half was dipped forward and back shoved into the air. He barred his teeth and growled, thunder and tremor rattling the sky and earth.