Character Creation 101: Better Characters are a Click Away!

[Stratarin]

Critiques encouraged!

Name: Anatoly Baryshnikov
Occupation: Minister of Defense and War in the Serene Republic of Stratarin
Gender: Male
Height: 5'10
Eyes: Green
Hair: Brown
Age: 23

Backstory: When Anatoly was a young boy, he would dream of battles, conflicts, and skirmishes, his imagination fueled by the stories of his father, a military veteran. As he grew, he studied more and more concerning battle strategies, famous clashes of armies, and tactical generals. What with the direction of his study, he soon became rather adept at strategy. As is Stratarin's custom, he was drafted into the military at age 17. He was exuberant. Finally, his chance to put all his knowledge into good use for the good of his country had presented itself. His superiors noticed a certain spark in him, and he rose through the ranks quickly. By the time he was 19, although he had already gained command of his own platoon, Anatoly had begun to grow weary. War, though fascinating in study, was grim in reality. He even had some guilt due to the lives he had taken in combat. He didn't let it show, though, and was known for his cheerfulness. Plus, his goal had never changed: he still worked for the good of his country. In his 22nd year, the largest revolution, called rather originally The Great Revolution, rocked the nation of Stratarin. By that time, he had a sizeable force under his command, and had several incredibly successful military operations under his belt. Due to Anatoly's skill, his command was deployed to end the revolution. Which he did. He ultimately crushed the Revolution in a single battle, despite having much less manpower, and followed up with several skirmishes that eliminated any remnants. Feeding off the fear that such a revolution had distilled in the populace, a new dictator named General Secretary Drugov rose to power (a different backstory for a different time). Noting Anatoly's talent that he deemed wasted, and being able to do whatever he pleased because he is a dictator, Drugov had Anatoly promoted to the office of the Minister of Defense and War, one of the higher honors that could be achieved. By this time, however, Anatoly's victory felt hollow. For it was not an enemy nation that he had bested, but his own kin. One year later, he still fights. He still smiles, he still tries to make Stratarin a better place. But he has started to wonder whether or not he is doing it the right way. Whether he killed enemies in battle or murdered men who stood up and paid the price. Whether he deserves his position or he deserves death.

Thoughts?

[Zekeinistan]

Critiques encouraged!

Name: Anatoly Baryshnikov
Occupation: Minister of Defense and War in the Serene Republic of Stratarin
Gender: Male
Height: 5'10
Eyes: Green
Hair: Brown
Age: 23

Backstory: When Anatoly was a young boy, he would dream of battles, conflicts, and skirmishes, his imagination fueled by the stories of his father, a military veteran. As he grew, he studied more and more concerning battle strategies, famous clashes of armies, and tactical generals. What with the direction of his study, he soon became rather adept at strategy. As is Stratarin's custom, he was drafted into the military at age 17. He was exuberant. Finally, his chance to put all his knowledge into good use for the good of his country had presented itself. His superiors noticed a certain spark in him, and he rose through the ranks quickly. By the time he was 19, although he had already gained command of his own platoon, Anatoly had begun to grow weary. War, though fascinating in study, was grim in reality. He even had some guilt due to the lives he had taken in combat. He didn't let it show, though, and was known for his cheerfulness. Plus, his goal had never changed: he still worked for the good of his country. In his 22nd year, the largest revolution, called rather originally The Great Revolution, rocked the nation of Stratarin. By that time, he had a sizeable force under his command, and had several incredibly successful military operations under his belt. Due to Anatoly's skill, his command was deployed to end the revolution. Which he did. He ultimately crushed the Revolution in a single battle, despite having much less manpower, and followed up with several skirmishes that eliminated any remnants. Feeding off the fear that such a revolution had distilled in the populace, a new dictator named General Secretary Drugov rose to power (a different backstory for a different time). Noting Anatoly's talent that he deemed wasted, and being able to do whatever he pleased because he is a dictator, Drugov had Anatoly promoted to the office of the Minister of Defense and War, one of the higher honors that could be achieved. By this time, however, Anatoly's victory felt hollow. For it was not an enemy nation that he had bested, but his own kin. One year later, he still fights. He still smiles, he still tries to make Stratarin a better place. But he has started to wonder whether or not he is doing it the right way. Whether he killed enemies in battle or murdered men who stood up and paid the price. Whether he deserves his position or he deserves death.

Thoughts?

Anatoly definitely moved through those ranks way too quickly, even if he was obsessed with the military his entire childhood.

[Habna]

Could I get some aid?
Ill warn you though; my characters are furries

[Rhodevus]

Could I get some aid?
Ill warn you though; my characters are furries

This is here for any and all characters. Doesn't matter if it's human, animal-human hybrid or full on chihuahua. If it is going to be written about, it can be done here.

[Habna]

Could I get some aid?
Ill warn you though; my characters are furries

This is here for any and all characters. Doesn't matter if it's human, animal-human hybrid or full on chihuahua. If it is going to be written about, it can be done here.

Well I have some fursonas whose histories ans personalities have become very crowded and scattered and akward

[The Alexanderians]

Could I get some aid?
Ill warn you though; my characters are furries

This is here for any and all characters. Doesn't matter if it's human, animal-human hybrid or full on chihuahua. If it is going to be written about, it can be done here.

That being said many of the resources would probably work the same or nearly the same be the character a furry or a normal person.

[Halvarda]

I've seen people posting pictures of characters like the ones on OP's post, but I can't find any links to such character maker. I'm also too lazy to go through the whole thread. Can someone post a link? I'd really appreciate it.

[Zekeinistan]

I've seen people posting pictures of characters like the ones on OP's post, but I can't find any links to such character maker. I'm also too lazy to go through the whole thread. Can someone post a link? I'd really appreciate it.

viewtopic.php?f=23&t=385928

[Habna]

Could I get some aid?
Ill warn you though; my characters are furries

This is here for any and all characters. Doesn't matter if it's human, animal-human hybrid or full on chihuahua. If it is going to be written about, it can be done here.

Well anyway may we commence?

[Rhodevus]

This is here for any and all characters. Doesn't matter if it's human, animal-human hybrid or full on chihuahua. If it is going to be written about, it can be done here.

Well anyway may we commence?

all you must do it post it here. No need to ask for permission

[Habna]

Well anyway may we commence?

all you must do it post it here. No need to ask for permission

Well my first character
He is 16 years old and he is a loner but still pretty talkative and
He once did this thing where he stole candy from annoying little kids and sold them to foreign countries to I guess be sold to children there...he also temporarily ruled a small obscure nation but doesn't any more because it was boring I guess...
You can see it's really scattered.
He lives in the fictional us state of Fur Island in a town called Glassvale
Also he has the ability to explode and reform unless he's in a specific story where cant for reasons to keep things different... I don't know.
But usually he can just reform after exploding a horrible weird furry inflation death,

What do you think is he too edgy? I can't see how he could be marry sue because doesn't that require it to be a fanfiction?

[Rhodevus]

all you must do it post it here. No need to ask for permission

Well my first character
He is 16 years old and he is a loner but still pretty talkative and
He once did this thing where he stole candy from annoying little kids and sold them to foreign countries to I guess be sold to children there...he also temporarily ruled a small obscure nation but doesn't any more because it was boring I guess...
You can see it's really scattered.
He lives in the fictional us state of Fur Island in a town called Glassvale
Also he has the ability to explode and reform unless he's in a specific story where cant for reasons to keep things different... I don't know.
But usually he can just reform after exploding a horrible weird furry inflation death,

What do you think is he too edgy? I can't see how he could be marry sue because doesn't that require it to be a fanfiction?

okay, so he is a 16 year old talkative loner who steals candy from children and sells them to foreign countries? And, at the age of 16, he temporarily ruled a small country?


It is definitely all over the place. Big question: why is he stealing candy from children and selling it to other countries? More importantly, why are other countries buying his stolen candy? (how much candy is he stealing that countries would want to buy it?)
And he ruled a country? How did a 16 year old kid rule a country?

and who's sue?

[Habna]

Well my first character
He is 16 years old and he is a loner but still pretty talkative and
He once did this thing where he stole candy from annoying little kids and sold them to foreign countries to I guess be sold to children there...he also temporarily ruled a small obscure nation but doesn't any more because it was boring I guess...
You can see it's really scattered.
He lives in the fictional us state of Fur Island in a town called Glassvale
Also he has the ability to explode and reform unless he's in a specific story where cant for reasons to keep things different... I don't know.
But usually he can just reform after exploding a horrible weird furry inflation death,

What do you think is he too edgy? I can't see how he could be marry sue because doesn't that require it to be a fanfiction?

okay, so he is a 16 year old talkative loner who steals candy from children and sells them to foreign countries? And, at the age of 16, he temporarily ruled a small country?


It is definitely all over the place. Big question: why is he stealing candy from children and selling it to other countries? More importantly, why are other countries buying his stolen candy? (how much candy is he stealing that countries would want to buy it?)
And he ruled a country? How did a 16 year old kid rule a country?

and who's sue?

A marry sue is a character who invades an already established story and tries to be important in a contrived way.

Swarvia was the country he once ruled by winning a lottery,
He then sent it back to communism because even that is better than a lottocracy,
Then he just abandoned the country- however Swarvia is one of the main Countries he sold the stolen candy too

[Rhodevus]

okay, so he is a 16 year old talkative loner who steals candy from children and sells them to foreign countries? And, at the age of 16, he temporarily ruled a small country?


It is definitely all over the place. Big question: why is he stealing candy from children and selling it to other countries? More importantly, why are other countries buying his stolen candy? (how much candy is he stealing that countries would want to buy it?)
And he ruled a country? How did a 16 year old kid rule a country?

and who's sue?

A marry sue is a character who invades an already established story and tries to be important in a contrived way.

Swarvia was the country he once ruled by winning a lottery,
He then sent it back to communism because even that is better than a lottocracy,
Then he just abandoned the country- however Swarvia is one of the main Countries he sold the stolen candy too

Oh! A Mary Sue. I thought you meant that he was marrying someone named Sue.
Why is selling candy to a country such a big thing? And how is he possibly able to obtain enough candy that a country would want to buy it? It's not like countries buy a basket or two of candy.

and what story are you trying to put this character into?

[Habna]

A marry sue is a character who invades an already established story and tries to be important in a contrived way.

Swarvia was the country he once ruled by winning a lottery,
He then sent it back to communism because even that is better than a lottocracy,
Then he just abandoned the country- however Swarvia is one of the main Countries he sold the stolen candy too

Oh! A Mary Sue. I thought you meant that he was marrying someone named Sue.
Why is selling candy to a country such a big thing? And how is he possibly able to obtain enough candy that a country would want to buy it? It's not like countries buy a basket or two of candy.

and what story are you trying to put this character into?

No! To people in those countries!

[The Irish County of the Beare-Mor]

Here's a character I have:

Name: Mikael Lunden
Gender: Male
Sexuality: Bi
Appearance: Mikael Lunden, standing at 5' 10'' stares out at the world with his somber, emerald-colored eyes. His unruly raven-black hair protrudes from his scalp at different angles, and his lanky build betrays his lack of athletics.
Personality: Mikael is a somber fellow who always keeps his secrets close to his chest. He has few friends, and of those, even fewer he would trust with his life. He keeps busy messing with small projects, be it electronics or mechanical systems. Mikael finds it hard to trust someone, and it would take a while for them to gain some of his trust.
Backstory:When Mikael was young, about 8 years of age, his parents seperated, and moved to seperate locations. He was able to still see his father, albeit rarely. When he did visit his father, at least for the next decade, he learned how different mechanical parts worked as his father was an engineer. As Mikael rarely saw his father, he paid attention to what he learned, and focused on becoming more talented with mechanical and electrical compnonents. However, when he was with his mother, he hated every moment of it. She became unfocused about him, and he had to find a way to support himself. He became very frustrated with his life, and practiced using blades. He was a well read child, and was always fascinated with the fantasy stories that included warriors, and regular people, well trained in the use of blades. So, he made a dummy, made from metals and whatever junk he could acquire, and lashed out at it, becoming learned in how to properly wield a blade. He got used to the balance of many blades and continues to keep his blades honed. Around his 18th birthday, his father was taken away from him, sent to a prison. What time he once had to see him was now nearly completely diminished. He started to hold secrets close to him, and avoided talking to people, afraid that they would leave too. It was not long before that, when he decided to run away. Bringing what he could, he left his family and eventually made his way to the Town of Magus, and found work in a bar where he could work for room and board. He was no stranger to hard work, and so he excelled. This is where you find Mikael now.


(This is for a rp. I got accepted into it, just wondering what I could do to make him more developed.)

[Rhodevus]

Oh! A Mary Sue. I thought you meant that he was marrying someone named Sue.
Why is selling candy to a country such a big thing? And how is he possibly able to obtain enough candy that a country would want to buy it? It's not like countries buy a basket or two of candy.

and what story are you trying to put this character into?

No! To people in those countries!

so he sells a basket or two of candy to people in other countries? Why not sell it to people in his own country?

[Habna]

No! To people in those countries!

so he sells a basket or two of candy to people in other countries? Why not sell it to people in his own country?

They sell for more in the other countries because they are illegal there and sell very high on the black market...oh my god I'am making this so ridiculous, maybe he should just sell them at home

[Western Marson]

Critiques encouraged!

Name: Anatoly Baryshnikov
Occupation: Minister of Defense and War in the Serene Republic of Stratarin
Gender: Male
Height: 5'10
Eyes: Green
Hair: Brown
Age: 23

Backstory: When Anatoly was a young boy, he would dream of battles, conflicts, and skirmishes, his imagination fueled by the stories of his father, a military veteran. As he grew, he studied more and more concerning battle strategies, famous clashes of armies, and tactical generals. What with the direction of his study, he soon became rather adept at strategy. As is Stratarin's custom, he was drafted into the military at age 17. He was exuberant. Finally, his chance to put all his knowledge into good use for the good of his country had presented itself. His superiors noticed a certain spark in him, and he rose through the ranks quickly. By the time he was 19, although he had already gained command of his own platoon, Anatoly had begun to grow weary. War, though fascinating in study, was grim in reality. He even had some guilt due to the lives he had taken in combat. He didn't let it show, though, and was known for his cheerfulness. Plus, his goal had never changed: he still worked for the good of his country. In his 22nd year, the largest revolution, called rather originally The Great Revolution, rocked the nation of Stratarin. By that time, he had a sizeable force under his command, and had several incredibly successful military operations under his belt. Due to Anatoly's skill, his command was deployed to end the revolution. Which he did. He ultimately crushed the Revolution in a single battle, despite having much less manpower, and followed up with several skirmishes that eliminated any remnants. Feeding off the fear that such a revolution had distilled in the populace, a new dictator named General Secretary Drugov rose to power (a different backstory for a different time). Noting Anatoly's talent that he deemed wasted, and being able to do whatever he pleased because he is a dictator, Drugov had Anatoly promoted to the office of the Minister of Defense and War, one of the higher honors that could be achieved. By this time, however, Anatoly's victory felt hollow. For it was not an enemy nation that he had bested, but his own kin. One year later, he still fights. He still smiles, he still tries to make Stratarin a better place. But he has started to wonder whether or not he is doing it the right way. Whether he killed enemies in battle or murdered men who stood up and paid the price. Whether he deserves his position or he deserves death.

Thoughts?

Anatoly definitely moved through those ranks way too quickly, even if he was obsessed with the military his entire childhood.

I'm gonna have to agree with this guy- there's no way that anybody would be mature enough to essentially command an army at 22. Most ministers of war in MEDCs are at least 50 years old. It's a good story, but you just need to adjust the age a little to make him seem more realistic. Hope this helps.

[Rezua]

viewtopic.php?f=31&t=395227

This RP will be a character based roleplay. If anyone wants to learn how to develop characters, I encourage you to come to my roleplay. Don't let the Mistborn theme scare you, I can help you understand it all.

[Dmitry II]

Awesome! A mod and a mentor! This thread now has class!

It isn't that much of an accomplishment. Hell, I get mods on my forum posts all the time when I accidentally make a forum post in the wrong category

[Rhodevus]

Emotion in Action

Emotion is the most important part of turning a character into a person. Emotion is the key aspect that takes your words and turns them into a living and breathing individual that the reader can root for, or hate, or just plain feel sorry for. This is what you as a writer (and RPer) should strive for.

Now, without further ado, let’s get into the key features of emotion (PS. I am not a psychologist or anything). The definition of emotion is the natural instinctive state of mind, deriving from one’s circumstances, mood, or relationships with others. We are going to break emotion in writing into these three categories.

Starting with one’s circumstances. This one is generally the most obvious one, and the one most normally used in people’s writing. This is the one I like to refer to as the action-reaction emotion. When something good happens you feel good. When something bad happens you feel bad. Very simple. There are of course, complex things which good happen, which are both good and bad, or varying degrees/levels of each. But, what is normally felt by the character is that which is either closest to him/her or closest to others. More complex processes are needed, and thus, the other two categories of emotion.

Let’s move on to relationships with others. Relationships are broad and diverse and very important and will have a lecture on it sometime in the future. So, in summary before that big lecture later on, relationships give your character an outward motivation to act and/or react. All relationships are, are interactions with other characters. Not just love interests or enemies, but every single person that comes into contact with one another is a relationship and all these can influence that motive and emotions of the character. This is the next set of simple and semi-complex things which a character can interact with and get some sort of “feeling” from. This is all still outward based, same as circumstances. The player just reacts to something. Instead of a situation this time, it is a person/character.

Now, let’s focus on mood. This one is a very important concept that most people just completely forget to write about and involves the most complex interactions. These are the ones that happen inside the player’s heads. Whether in first or third person, it is important to remember that the character still has his/her own desires and feelings. Sometimes, the character wakes up on the wrong side of the bed. Those days, remember that something that used to make the character happy can make them mad. If the character is having a great day, then even failures can, not be so bad. It is also important to remember that emotions inside oneself can change at a whim. Have you ever felt happy one moment and then furious for no reason at another? A true, human like character will also have these times.

The best, is to remember that all 3 situations happen at any and every moment of a story. We are always interacting with our surroundings and others and ourselves. In your writings, always take into account these 3 aspects of emotion.


If you would like to write a lecture of Character Creation 101, feel telegram Rhodevus with the subject and key points for approval.

[Vel Che]

Well, this looks like fun. It also looks like nobody has posted here in a while, so why not?

Name: Luisinho Feliciano
Occupation: Acting President of the Republic of Vel Che
Gender: Male
Height: 6'01"
Eyes: Brown
Hair: Black (dyed)
Age: 59

If one were to tell Luisinho Feliciano in his youth that he would lead a nation, he would star blankly back at them for a few seconds and go back to work making burgers. What hope was there for a burger flipper at a burger franchise in a small town, anyhow? He didn't speak often, he certainly didn't have the charisma of a leader and just about everything he did from a short lived military career and college pursuits led to failure. Really, his biggest feat at that time was keeping a job. One could blame the crippling low self esteem on him being the middle child of five with divorced parents and constant moving and psychologist visits and his motto: "For every finger you point at someone, three more are pointing right back at you".

However, as time went on, he worked his way up the ranks in the franchise, eventually making his way to regional manager with a reputation for being defensive towards those in his district, calling out the corporate leadership and being a firm believer in hard work. When the Vel Che Civil War erupted he witnessed devestation of his home town and areas he worked with. People he worked with for many years gone in more ways than one. Buildings he helped open and run reduced to rubble. Roads no longer working and people in a panic. He wished to remain neutral of the fighting, so he hunkered down back in what was left of his home town and helped organize a rebuilding effort. His only drive was to see his town flourish again, but it became difficult when a post-Civil War crime wave terrorized the town with riots, arson, robbery, and vandalism and other violent crimes. It might as well have destroyed everything he tried to rebuild. Though, underneath the guidelines set up by the Vel Che Charter he was elected as Mayor of his home town. He was able to put down the crime wave using a combination of intense crackdowns, frequent public speakings and visits to those effected by crime to garner public support, and offering incentives to those who would turn in their criminal friends. The bigger their report, the bigger the reward.

Soon, Luisinho Feliciano found his way up to be a Representative and keeping up with his desires to make citizens safe, he advocated for stronger police forces (including militarization), programs to prevent crime and harsher sentences for criminals. Some speculated that power got to his head, but he denied that, and he denied it with more fervor when he ran for President, promising a stable and safer Vel Che. After a narrow victory, he was quick to promote his idea of safer Vel Che, leading to an intense war crime and what many are saying a war on civil rights. But for President Feliciano, no price is too high to keep his country from burning again.

[Furbish Islands]

Name: Big-Noo
Occupation: Prime Minister
Gender: Male
Species: Furby
Biography: Big-Noo was born to a middle-class family in Furby City on the day of the election in 1/23/1984. After graduating high school in 2000, he went to Furby City University to study law(please keep in mind that Furby Island's education system was different due to isolation). After graduating in 2004, he become a lawyer. In 2007, he decided to resign and run as an MP for the Conservative Party for the 2008 election. He ended up with a seat. He also ran in 2010, 2012, and 2014 and got a seat. He decided to run again in 2016. This time, he was 25th on the party's list, which meant that he had a chance of being the PM if the Conservative Party had the majority. He won the position by only 1%. At that time, Furby Island had a huge debt after the Liberal Party added the environmental protection acts. The Conservative Party won the most seats in Parliament, which meant that Big-Noo became the PM. He removed many regulations, created the advertising acts(which allowed corporations to make ads on government property), and abolished corporation taxes and that ended the debt.

[Ord Caprica]

Oliver Kenway Jr.-Literally my flagship character and while his fact book entry isn't anywhere near finished, my character notes are for the most part all encompassing except when it comes to explaining certain behaviors.

To fully explain his character, I've got to start with his grandfather, Michael Kenway ''The Admiral'', the only surviving Kenway after the Great Astyrian War, Michael was left to take over his families noble estates and their debts which were considerable after their contribution to the war effort. He decided to stay in the Navy after the war and eventually managed to get their family debt under control throughout his career though never able to give his children the prosperity that previous generations of Kenways had enjoyed. He had three sons, George Sr, Francis and Oliver Sr. George Sr , followed his father's footsteps and joined the Navy, becoming a national hero with his own fame as a Naval Aviator, Francis achieved his own level of renown within the tight-knit Intelligence Community of Caprica as one of the founding father's of the country's Central Intelligence Service, and Oliver Sr. having grown up with quite the chip on his shoulder from having such accomplished family figures as well as being the ''poor kid, with a rich name'' went into banking to obtain his fortune, a goal that he accomplished many times over, at his death being worth an estimated 600 million talents.

So Oliver Jr. grew up a privileged boy from a famous family, raised in the lap of luxury without a care in the world other than to uphold the Kenway legacy, and what a legacy it was. After graduating from an Ivy League school, he followed in his grandfather's shadow and joined the navy and upon the suggestion of his uncle, became a Naval Aviator, only a shade less talented than the legendary ace that he was attempting to emulate. He served just under a decade in Navy before getting out right before the birth of his second child only to see his birthplace brought to it's knees by a crippling terrorist attack weeks after he resigned his commission.

Looking to help his city and his country; he ran a incredibly successful campaign for first Mayor then Governor of his state before finally making an insurgent run for the Prosperity Party's presidential nomination and then beating out all other candidates to win the closest presidential election in living history.

As President, he's worked to do all the things he said he would do during his campaign, strengthen the military, fight terrorism domestically and internationally, streamline the government, reform the education system and stimulate economic growth. He's also done things he didn't say he was going to do, like get into an affair with his high-powered Press Secretary, and conceiving a child with her, as well as accusations of nepotism due to his cabinet consisting almost exclusively of fellow prep school and Ivy League graduates.

The Campaign Trail

---

So any tips, critiques or helpful suggestions on how to improve the character or just your thoughts would be greatly appreciated.