Is divorce selfish? Is it a right?

[Jumalariik]

Is it a right for parents to get divorced and is it selfish?

This is not a complicated question. Simply put, when parents get divorced, children suffer. Be it through feeling that they are the cause, custody battles, weird boyfriend/girlfriends of parents, confusion, getting trapped in the middle of conflicts, etc. Is it selfish of parents to be divorced knowing this is true?

My parents were divorced when I was young, and still today, I get caught up in the conflicts that they have between each other over who has me when. I don't really care so long as I have a roof over my head, however, I'm a lucky one, many kids/teenagers do not have the luck of having two good parents in this case, I think that it is inherently selfish for parents to get divorced, however, it is often the better solution, what about you NSG?

[Scottish Gallifrey]

Is it a right for parents to get divorced and is it selfish?

This is not a complicated question. Simply put, when parents get divorced, children suffer. Be it through feeling that they are the cause, custody battles, weird boyfriend/girlfriends of parents, confusion, getting trapped in the middle of conflicts, etc. Is it selfish of parents to be divorced knowing this is true?

My parents were divorced when I was young, and still today, I get caught up in the conflicts that they have between each other over who has me when. I don't really care so long as I have a roof over my head, however, I'm a lucky one, many kids/teenagers do not have the luck of having two good parents in this case, I think that it is inherently selfish for parents to get divorced, however, it is often the better solution, what about you NSG?

Simple, divorce is not selfish and if there is a reason it is right. Case closed. Can we go home now?

[Lalaki]

It's really both.

People should consider the long term implications of getting married. The phenomenon of divorce will never end, as issues can always arise later in marriage. But if people thought more, and placed more value on being wed, the rate could potentially go down.

[Furry Alairia and Algeria]

It's a right. There really isn't a better decision if one wants separation other than a silent murder.

[Page]

But some parents' relationships are so shitty that children would suffer more by them not getting divorced.

[The Liberated Territories]

As someone who is going through a parental separation, I believe that the "rational self interest" of one spouse in the long run can benefit the whole family, especially if they aren't getting along or the kids are constantly being negatively affected into their arguing. Mind you, I am a young adult, so it doesn't affect me as much as a preteen, but that's just my PoV.

[Furry Alairia and Algeria]

Not to mention some couples are childless, so the child possibility would be a bit removed

[Jumalariik]

As someone who is going through a parental separation, I believe that the "rational self interest" of one spouse in the long run can benefit the whole family, especially if they aren't getting along or the kids are constantly being negatively affected into their arguing.

I won't deny that, especially since in my case they did it so early that I'm not too affected, them arguing is my earliest memory though, then again, I was on a nice wall-to wall carpet in the memory too, kinda makes up for it.

[Shnercropolis]

Well honestly you shouldn't marry someone who you can't stand after 5 years. Make it work.

But then again, people have the right to leave other people if they want to.

[Jumalariik]

It's a right. There really isn't a better decision if one wants separation other than a silent murder.

It is selfish though. Parents who obsess over custody battles are being self-centered and are harming their kids, not helping them most of the time.

[Shnercropolis]

It's a right. There really isn't a better decision if one wants separation other than a silent murder.

It is selfish though. Parents who obsess over custody battles are being self-centered and are harming their kids, not helping them most of the time.

people have the right to be dicks, up to a certain point.

[The House of Xavier]

Ideally, you marry somebody where there exists some form of compatibility. But that can be hard to maintain or even determine beforehand, so divorce is necessary.

[Furry Alairia and Algeria]

It's a right. There really isn't a better decision if one wants separation other than a silent murder.

It is selfish though. Parents who obsess over custody battles are being self-centered and are harming their kids, not helping them most of the time.

So it's better if I put myself in the hypothetical situation in which I'm married, have a child, kill the mother, and tell my child, who might have seen the murder, say, "Mommy went away. Don't worry, you have me!" and eventually abuse my kid and become a deadbeat Dad, or just settle for a divorce case?
Tell me.

[Bezkoshtovnya]

Is it a right for parents to get divorced and is it selfish?

This is not a complicated question. Simply put, when parents get divorced, children suffer. Be it through feeling that they are the cause, custody battles, weird boyfriend/girlfriends of parents, confusion, getting trapped in the middle of conflicts, etc. Is it selfish of parents to be divorced knowing this is true?

My parents were divorced when I was young, and still today, I get caught up in the conflicts that they have between each other over who has me when. I don't really care so long as I have a roof over my head, however, I'm a lucky one, many kids/teenagers do not have the luck of having two good parents in this case, I think that it is inherently selfish for parents to get divorced, however, it is often the better solution, what about you NSG?

Simple, divorce is not selfish and if there is a reason it is right. Case closed. Can we go home now?

Ding-ding. We have a winner.

[Alcase]

Divorce is a right.

[United Marxist Nations]

I tend to somewhat hold the idea of Bertrand Russel on divorce; that being, that it is just fine, but that if there are children, that it shouldn't be done. Of course, this is flexible in the case of something like domestic violence, in which case the child is also at danger from the violence, and should be removed from such danger.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

As a product of divorced parents, for a long time I thought my parents had been selfish in divorcing. But after a while I realized that because they sought to be happy, even when not together, mine and my brother's quality of life improved precisely because my mom and my dad were able to be happy, albeit with different spouses. Consequently, now, I do not think it's selfish. It's unfortunate in many cases, but not selfish. If the parents aren't happy together, neither will the children be. And if they don't have children, I think they owe to themselves to strive to be happy.

Sometimes, that happiness is achieved by parting ways.

[Cedoria]

If there are serious problems in the marriage, I would say that it is MORE selfish for the parents to stay together and subject the kid to that kind of conflict every day than divorcing and trying to remove oneself from it.
However, I do agree, people should be very careful about who they marry in the first place. My father gave me two pieces of advice about this

"Never get married until at least 30"
"Before you marry a girl, look at her mother, chances are she'll be exactly like her mother in ten years time,"

That may sound sexist to some of you, it did to me, but doesn't mean he's not right.

[Jumalariik]

It's a right. There really isn't a better decision if one wants separation other than a silent murder.

What the hell are you talking about? Are you joking? I thought you were until I saw your later post.
The fact is that it is a right, however, you have to think about the child, your idea is that it is just between the parents, it's not.

[Furry Alairia and Algeria]

It's a right. There really isn't a better decision if one wants separation other than a silent murder.

What the hell are you talking about? Are you joking? I thought you were until I saw your later post.
The fact is that it is a right, however, you have to think about the child, your idea is that it is just between the parents, it's not.

As you are Christian, you do realize the only way to actually divorce or separate from a matrimonial bond is to kill the wife, as it dates back in old history. Legal disputes were common, but were nevertheless ended up in one of the two dead because of the other's actions. Look at your own culture & religion before you start complaining about someone else's decisions, because you seem to be doing that often.

[Ifreann]

Is it a right for parents to get divorced and is it selfish?

Yes and maybe, respectively.

This is not a complicated question. Simply put, when parents get divorced, children suffer.

Every time? Doubt it.

[Distruzio]

Is it a right? No. Is it selfish? Yes.

Once you have children, your obligation as a parent is to the safety and prosperity of them. If, in securing those obligations you yourself are rendered more safe and prosperous, well done. But at no point should you place your own happiness above that of your children (unless spousal abuse is involved - in that case, get the fuck out).

[The Sotoan Union]

Yes it should definitely be a right to leave someone if you want to. How could you think that couldn't be a right? That's bondage.

[Ifreann]

Yes it should definitely be a right to leave someone if you want to. How could you think that couldn't be a right? That's bondage.

No, bondage is something else entirely.

[The United Territories of Providence]

When the well being of a child, and development of that child is being threatened by their parents remaining married, divorce isn't selfish.
Growing up in a dysfunctional household, where one's parents share no love for one another, and simply remain married because they believe children need 2 parents. That's selfish. Parents are people, who also deserve happiness. Wishing your parents would've just grit their teeth for a few more years, and lived day after day with a person they hate....faking emotion. That would make the child selfish.