Your biggest dating fail

[Blazedtown]

Dating? What is this dating you speak of?
.foreveralone

You're forever along because its all in your head. Unless your like a flesh eating sea monster with bad gas or something. If your the Kraken, you have a good reason to be forever alone. Since your using your computer to post on NSG, not lure people to your undersea cave for dinner, its in your head. Have a few beers and it goes away.

[Lacadaemon]

I think that I'd just keep getting the Bad Ending if I used them, anyway.

Eh? A bad ending is better than bad without ending - to paraphrase the germans.

[Lackadaisical2]

She got herself pregnant.

Does that count?

You were dating a plant...?

Dating? What is this dating you speak of?
.foreveralone

You're forever along because its all in your head. Unless your like a flesh eating sea monster with bad gas or something. If your the Kraken, you have a good reason to be forever alone. Since your using your computer to post on NSG, not lure people to your undersea cave for dinner, its in your head. Have a few beers and it goes away.

Seconded.

[Four-sided Triangles]

Not denying this, but there's definitely variety.

Which the rest of the post maintained by stating that I'm a man who does not have low standards.

[Lackadaisical2]

Not denying this, but there's definitely variety.

Which the rest of the post maintained by stating that I'm a man who does not have low standards.

But don't you have no standards, in this regard?

[Drekka]

LOL this post is getting out of hand.

[The Cookish States]

She got herself pregnant.

Does that count?

How does that work?

To spare you the gory details...

"Ahem, I'm about to go, get off."

"It's fine."

"I'm not for this, get off please.."

"Babe, chill."

Needless to say, I'm too much of a gentleman to have thrown her off from on top of me...so yeah.

Plus, I'm 17. Lots of expenses for awhile, then she went and got an abortion without even telling me first. Learned my lesson. Hopefully she learned hers. Sad that it had to end that way though.

Still, it's a good story I 'spose

[The Grand World Order]

I took my date for a walk around town (I prefer walking places with dates instead of driving; the town I live in is usually rather nice) and ended up in the ghetto because of a wrong turn.

Then I took an arrow in the knee got hit by a car and she left me there. I don't know which part is more fail.

[Lacadaemon]

Which the rest of the post maintained by stating that I'm a man who does not have low standards.

Wrong.

Two things I leaned, in the South, of these Great States of this United States of America:

1. If it ain't brown, it don't go down.

2. Go Ugly Early.

Wise words. And ones we can all live by I think.

[The Tenth Fleet]

My biggest mistake was going out with the same girl three times in a row with each time she wanting to break up with me.

....THAN still sitting at the same table as her in the morning before school.

It wasn't quite as awkward as you may think though...

I think I kept dating her cause I was desperate...

OH WELL! My only love now is the satisfaction of pissing people off and making sarcastic remarks. AWW YEAH.

[The Imperial Federacy]

How does that work?

To spare you the gory details...

"Ahem, I'm about to go, get off."

"It's fine."

"I'm not for this, get off please.."

"Babe, chill."

Needless to say, I'm too much of a gentleman to have thrown her off from on top of me...so yeah.

Plus, I'm 17. Lots of expenses for awhile, then she went and got an abortion without even telling me first. Learned my lesson. Hopefully she learned hers. Sad that it had to end that way though.

Still, it's a good story I 'spose

Define "good" please.

[Tropic Brown Granite]

I gave a quote on a new granite counter top. It was both a win and a fail. Lost the girlfriend, gained a customer.

[Lackadaisical2]

Needless to say, I'm too much of a gentleman to have thrown her off from on top of me...so yeah.

I know I've thrown a girl off me before... not that going bareback was a great idea to begin with.

[Four-sided Triangles]

But don't you have no standards, in this regard?

I won't have sex with you unless you rape me. That's about as high of a standard as they come.

[Potarius]

No comment.

[Mavorpen]

Not denying this, but there's definitely variety.

Which the rest of the post maintained by stating that I'm a man who does not have low standards.

For me it depends on what you mean by low standards. My standard is: You must be the opposite of the typical American. For some that is a high standard, for others, that's an excuse to get pissed off at me and call me an asshole.

[Blazedtown]

But don't you have no standards, in this regard?

I won't have sex with you unless you rape me. That's about as high of a standard as they come.

You saw your parents having sex like a couple of wild animals didn't you? That's about all that I can think of that would make you this anti-fun.

[The Cookish States]

My biggest mistake was going out with the same girl three times in a row with each time she wanting to break up with me.

....THAN still sitting at the same table as her in the morning before school.

It wasn't quite as awkward as you may think though...

I think I kept dating her cause I was desperate...

OH WELL! My only love now is the satisfaction of pissing people off and making sarcastic remarks. AWW YEAH.

Cool story, bro.

Jk, she sounds like a bitchad person. You're fine bro, chicks dig the sarcasm sometimes

[Lackadaisical2]

But don't you have no standards, in this regard?

I won't have sex with you unless you rape me. That's about as high of a standard as they come.

Well, if thats what you want...

[Mavorpen]

But don't you have no standards, in this regard?

I won't have sex with you unless you rape me. That's about as high of a standard as they come.

Everyone knows that in America, it is impossible for women to rape men... unless you meant... Never mind.

[Lacadaemon]

No comment.

Aye, but the true fact is that you mix vodka with hi-caffeine drinks, so hilarity &c,

It's almost your duty to share these fine stories.

[Four-sided Triangles]

For me it depends on what you mean by low standards. My standard is: You must be the opposite of the typical American. For some that is a high standard, for others, that's an excuse to get pissed off at me and call me an asshole.

Welcome to the patriarchy, where women aren't allowed to want sex and men aren't allowed to not want sex. Women with low standards are "sluts," and men with high standards are "fags," or "assholes."

[Lackadaisical2]

For me it depends on what you mean by low standards. My standard is: You must be the opposite of the typical American. For some that is a high standard, for others, that's an excuse to get pissed off at me and call me an asshole.

Welcome to the patriarchy, where women aren't allowed to want sex and men aren't allowed to not want sex. Women with low standards are "sluts," and men with high standards are "fags," or "assholes."

*nods*
Many a time I've been called an asshole, not sure it has anything to do with patriarchy though.

[Four-sided Triangles]

You saw your parents having sex like a couple of wild animals didn't you?

No. My parents don't aren't all that sexual. I don't know if they've even had sex in YEARS.

[Mavorpen]

For me it depends on what you mean by low standards. My standard is: You must be the opposite of the typical American. For some that is a high standard, for others, that's an excuse to get pissed off at me and call me an asshole.

Welcome to the patriarchy, where women aren't allowed to want sex and men aren't allowed to not want sex. Women with low standards are "sluts," and men with high standards are "fags," or "assholes."

I have never in the history of my life used the word "fag." However, if I ever call you an asshole, don't take it personally, I call everyone that.