A Crackdown You Shouldn't Refuse [SUBMITTED]

[TurtleShroom]

I've heard people- especially commies -call the government a "protection racket". Meanwhile, the Mafia, protection's other example, is often compared directly do this, saying the only difference is their legality. Like the Mafia, if you pay the government, they won't bother you... -but tax evasion... eh, it makes you "disappear" for a few months. Or years.

So, here's my Issue... what if the Mafia's protection racket and the government's "protection racket" FUSED?

---

ISSUE NAME: A Crackdown You Shouldn't Refuse

VALIDITY: For any nation with a tax above 40% and extremely low crime.

DESCRIPTION: Heavilly crippled by the endless police busts, arrests, raids, and jail time, the @@NAME@@ branch of the Mafia seems to want to give up their ways and defect to the good side, becoming "productive members of society". Of course, the Mob's definition of the "good side" is a little... how do you say... shifty?

THE ISSUE:

[option]A very tall, muscular man comes into your office sporting the finest in striped suits and jewelry. Next to him are two equally large goons, with weapons. "Listen. My name's Big Mac Daddy, and I am a hard working, legit citizen of @@NAME@@. Your cops have been attacking me and my boys, see, but no matter how many of them we... take care of... two come back to get revenge. Now, I understand that you and me have our differences, but hey, we're like family! Now, I understand that your coffers have suffered due to a lot of yellowbellies skirting around paying youse. That's why I want to make an offer you can't refuse: pardon my family, and we will make sure that no one will ever skirt taxes again. We're the most efficient collectors anywhere. Contracting our services will certainly... pay."
[effects]tax evaders end up sleeping with the fishes
[stats]concrete industry up (heh heh), tax evasion halts, corruption soars, organized crime up, white collar crime up, government deficit/waste slashed, economy slightly up, economic freedoms down, government becomes far more efficient, funding to Administration appears, government size shrinks (contracting tax collectors slashses IRS bureaucrats), the Mafia is legalized, increases chances for the Mafia casino issue if banning of gambling is in effect, "corrupt" added to government description, "Most Avoided" up, politeness up, political freedoms down

[option]"Was that.... a mobster that just left?" stammers @@RANDOMNAME@@, chief of police. "I know we need to crack down on tax evasion... -but the Mafia is certainly not proper for this. Sure, it may shrink the government, make revenue collecting efficient, and even lift tax collecting off of our backs, but you can't choose the Mafia; they're evil! You need to let us- your police -do it, not them. However, to do so, we need funding. Lots of funding. I mean TONS AND TONS of funding! Also, just think about how well we can fight crime with more funds!"
[effects]policemen have suddenly seen their salaries doubled and tax evaders are rapidly apprehended
[stats]Law and Order up, crime slashed, taxes up, safety up, corruption down, lots more police are added

[option]"Racketeering... you know, the Mafia came to us because WE'RE a protection racket! The only difference, of course, is what we're legal! Are we really that villanious that the mob wanted to swear allegience to us and collect taxes in our name?" notes a lowly bureaucrat called @@RANDOMNAME@@. "That's just WRONG! Perhaps the best way to crack down on tax evaders... is to cut taxes? I mean, the police do have a little too much money right now, don't they? The Mafia fears us to the point of submission. Surely a little reduction in police numbers won't hurt the invincible crime stoppers of @@NAME@@!"
[effects]mugged citizens have suddenly learned what was slashed to lower their taxes
[stats]crime way up, economy up, taxes slashed, police gutted/Law and Order way down, safety way down, happiness down, rebellious youth up, vandalism and all crime up, white collar crime up, nation becomes more dangerous

[option]"Organized crime is a pimple on the backside of @@NAME@@!" shouts @@RANDOMNAME@@, a rookie policeman. "Look! We've already got them begging to be spared our from awesome law enforcing wrath! Now, let's take it a step further and shut them down! We must up our current organized crime laws so that captured godfathers can be put to death for their minion's blood! ...-and... -and anyone in the Mafia must be put to death too! Yeah! Now, all we need is the funds and approval to do it!"
[effects]convicted members of the Mafia are sentanced to death
[stats]Law and Order up, death penalty instated (if it doesn't exist already), crime down, taxes up, nation becomes more harsh/extreme, crime deterred, organized crime halts, underground economy appears (smuggled items become worth more), safety up, nation swings more to the right

---

This one was a lot of fun for me to write. Commenting on it is a mandate you can't refuse.

[Mccolm]

this is awesome.

[New Amerik]

I love this, as IC I already do this: the local mob works for the government in stopping criminals the police can't catch, in return for allowing the mob to stay living and letting them target other criminAl businesses.

Maybe the first option could be all types pf crime, not just tax evaders, but me like!

[Mushet]

I like this issue but "A very tall, muscular man comes into your office sporting the finest in striped suits and jewelry. Next to him are two equally large goons, with weapons. However, the man seems to be distraught, and sends his goons out" seems out of place, you shouldn't describe them in this much detail it's just wierd for issues, but I do really like the effect for option 3 it's funny

[Zwangzug]

I'm really amused by this. Alas, I don't think there's actually a concrete industry.

[New Amerik]

I'm really amused by this. Alas, I don't think there's actually a concrete industry.

Hmmm.....maybe there would be a way to tweak the code so the first industry would change visually to say Concrete?

[Rich and Corporations]

Maybe use the woodchip industry. That's a bit more amusing.

[TurtleShroom]

I'm really amused by this. Alas, I don't think there's actually a concrete industry.

The closest thing to Concrete in the existing industries will go up. That's up to the Issue Editor (hopefully, that'll be me someday).

[CorruptDictators]

I like this issue, and hope to see it.

Though concrete industry isn't one of them. Here is a list.

There are 16 total, which are: automobile manufacturing, arms manufacturing, uranium mining, information technology, trout farming, beef-based agriculture, retail, book publishing, soda sales, pizza delivery, basket weaving, furniture restoration, cheese exports, woodchip exports, door-to-door insurance sales, and gambling

May I suggest woodchip export or beef-based agriculture. Those would be funny.

~Alternate account of ALBC

[Rich and Corporations]

Trout farming would also work.

Get it? Sleeping with the fishes?

[Atheists Led by Chris]

^ clever. very clever.

[TurtleShroom]

Trout farming would also work.

Get it? Sleeping with the fishes?

NICE. I should have added that before I submitted it.

[South Lorenya]

...logically, if crime is extremely low, wouldn't that mean most of the mafia is in prison?

I'd say that that high taxes, high police rations, and crime NOT extremely low would be a better trigger.

[Jalkil]

...logically, if crime is extremely low, wouldn't that mean most of the mafia is in prison?

I'd say that that high taxes, high police rations, and crime NOT extremely low would be a better trigger.

Either in prison, or as good as powerless.

Now, myself, I LOVE this issue! Wonderful! Just remove a little text, while it is well written and so on, issues are supposed to be short and good.

Perhaps have some guy wanting to completely remove taxes?

"Now, there is actually one VERY easy way to fix the tax evaders! REMOVE THE TAXES!!!" Says a tax-evader.
Just a short draft to make you understand what I mean.

[TurtleShroom]

...logically, if crime is extremely low, wouldn't that mean most of the mafia is in prison?

EXACTLY. That's why they're pleaing to the government. They've been brought to their knees, and seek to contract their services to the government in a desperate bid to save their hides.

[TurtleShroom]

"Now, there is actually one VERY easy way to fix the tax evaders! REMOVE THE TAXES!!!" Says a tax-evader.
Just a short draft to make you understand what I mean.

That's already covered in Option Three. The guy there calls for a big cut in taxes.

[New Amerik]

...logically, if crime is extremely low, wouldn't that mean most of the mafia is in prison?

EXACTLY. That's why they're pleaing to the government. They've been brought to their knees, and seek to contract their services to the government in a desperate bid to save their hides.

Indeed. It makes sense. Use crime to fight crime.

Heh, if I could put in any additional option, I'd have the government decide to contract all criminals who are willing to only commit crimes on people who already have, in exchange for legitimacy. That's how I already IC do it, at least.

Hope this gets passed.

[TurtleShroom]

This could also add a new variable in the description: "remarkable for its tax evaders that mysteriously vanish by the docks".

Or, "reknowned for its contract with the mob to collect taxes".

Or, "remarkable for its use of organized crime to do its bidding".

Or, if the last Option is chosen, "reknowned for its death penalty on racketeering".

[New Amerik]

This could also add a new variable in the description: "remarkable for its tax evaders that mysteriously vanish by the docks.

Or, "reknowned for its contract with the mob to collect taxes".

Or, "remarkable for its use of organized crime to do its bidding".

Or, if the last Option is chosen, "reknowned for its death penalty on racketeering".

Should be more simplified, "Renowned for it's numerous criminal contacts."

[Jalkil]

"Now, there is actually one VERY easy way to fix the tax evaders! REMOVE THE TAXES!!!" Says a tax-evader.
Just a short draft to make you understand what I mean.

That's already covered in Option Three. The guy there calls for a big cut in taxes.

Big cut =/= Removal.
But I guess it would be weird to have both a big cut and a complete removal.
And it would be too much of the extreme with a complete removal.

[Mahaj]

very nice, very nice.

[Seculartopia]

I only have one comment.



*kisses the floor beneath TS's feet*

[TurtleShroom]

I only have one comment.



*kisses the floor beneath TS's feet*

That's SO going in my quotes section.

[New Accord]

This could also add a new variable in the description: "remarkable for its tax evaders that mysteriously vanish by the docks".

Or, "reknowned for its contract with the mob to collect taxes".

Or, "remarkable for its use of organized crime to do its bidding".

Or, if the last Option is chosen, "reknowned for its death penalty on racketeering".

Guess I should move my boat then...I would love to see a version of this make it as an issue. Good writing

[Seculartopia]

I only have one comment.



*kisses the floor beneath TS's feet*

That's SO going in my quotes section.

Sec's first Siggy Quote!