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[SUBMITTED] Dirty Little Minds

A place to spoil daily issues for those who haven't had them yet, snigger at typos, and discuss ideas for new ones.
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Candlewhisper Archive
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[SUBMITTED] Dirty Little Minds

Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Thu Jan 14, 2016 3:23 am

Name:

Dirty Little Minds

Description:

The Health Ministry has expressed concerns at new evidence that pollutants in the atmosphere and in the water supply may be negatively affecting the intelligence and cognitive abilities of the nation's children.

Validity:

Valid for nations with Toxicity above the world average

Options:

[option]"Legislation is the answer," says tatty-suited progressive politician @@RANDOMNAME@@, "Crack down on air pollution, regulate vehicle emissions and heavily tax polluting industry and power generation. Yes, this is going to have economic impact, but won't you think of the children?"
[effect]draconian clean air and clean water laws are hobbling economic growth
[stats]toxicity reduces a lot, economy reduces quite a lot, taxation increases, authoritarianism increases a little, business subsidization reduces, eco-friendliness increases, environmental beauty increases, health increases, human development index increases, lifespan increases, industry: automobile manufacturing decreases, sector: manufacturing decreases, most pro-market decreases,

[option]"Self regulation is the answer," says expensively dressed industrialist @@RANDOMNAME@@, "The industry will... uh... establish a voluntary code of conduct, and we will definitely think about cutting into our profit margins and reneging on our obligations to our shareholders to make a fast buck. At the very least, we'll do some PR work."
[effect]major polluting industries have painted a lot of their machines green to give an impression of caring about the environment
[stats]toxicity increases a little, most pro-market increases, intelligence decreases

[option]"Science is the answer," says enthusiastic transhumanist @@RANDOMNAME@@ with a manic glint in his eye, "The problem here is that we've got the wrong sort of pollutants. Add the right neuro-stimulant chemicals to the waterways and the air, and I can guarantee you the lovely pollution will start making our kids cleverer instead. Sure, they might have increased risk of fatal brain haemorrhage in puberty, but they'll expand their cognition and consciousness, and become Human Plus."
[effect]the national water supply has a really weird metallic taste and a slight purple-tinge to it
[stats]toxicity increases a lot, scientific advancement increases, intelligence increases, health decreases, lifespan decreases, unexpected death rate increases, death from strokes increases, primitiveness decreases

[option]"Creative thinking is the answer," says slightly intimidating 'solutions manager' @@RANDOMNAME@@, "We can keep making pollutants, so long as we don't let them get into our nation's environment. I've got half a dozen ideas, from selling our waste to gullible third world nations as fertilisers, to sticking some of the nastier chemicals into new-flavour 'smokey-cola' and pushing it to export. Recategorise waste as product, and we can get it out of the country at a nice profit."
[effect]corrupt industrial practices are endemic in the nation
[stats]toxicity decreases a little, environmental beauty increases a little, eco-friendliness reduces a lot, corruption increases a lot, niceness decreases a lot, compassion decreases a lot, beverage sales increases, economy increases a little


Unmodded:
Name:

Dirty Little Minds

Description:

Environmentalists are concerned at new evidence that pollutants in the atmosphere and in the water supply may be negatively affecting the intelligence and cognitive abilities of the nation's children.

Validity:

Valid for nations with Toxicity above the world average

Options:

[option]"Legislation is the answer," says tatty-suited progressive politician @@RANDOMNAME@@, "Crack down on industrial pollution, regulate vehicle emissions and subsidise pollution free industry and power sources. Yes, this is going to have economic impact, but won't you think of the children?"
[effect]draconian clean air and clean water laws are hobbling economic growth
[stats]toxicity reduces a lot, economy reduces quite a lot, authoritarianism increases a little, business subsidization reduces a little, eco-friendliness increases, environmental beauty increases, health increases, human development index increases, lifespan increases, industry: automobile manufacturing decreases, sector: manufacturing decreases, most pro-market decreases, intelligence increases,

[option]"Self regulation is the answer," says Armani-suited industrialist @@RANDOMNAME@@, "The industry will... uh... establish a voluntary code of conduct, and we will definitely think about cutting into our profit margins and reneging on our obligations to our shareholders to make a fast buck. At the very least, we'll do some PR work."
[effect]major polluting industries have painted a lot of their machines green to give an impression of caring about the environment
[stats]toxicity increases a little, most pro-market increases

[option]"Science is the answer," says sweatpants wearing futurist @@RANDOMNAME@@, "The problem here is that we've got the wrong sort of pollutants. Add the right neuro-stimulant chemicals to the waterways and the air, and I can guarantee you the lovely pollution will start making our kids cleverer instead. Sure, they might have increased risk of fatal brain haemorrhage in puberty, but they'll ace their exams up to that point."
[effect]the national water supply has a really weird metallic taste and a slight purple-tinge to it
[stats]toxicity increases a lot, scientific advancement increases, intelligence increases, health decreases, lifespan decreases, unexpected death rate increases, death from strokes increases, primitiveness decreases

[option]"Creative thinking is the answer," says cowl-wearing co-conspirator @@RANDOMNAME@@, "We can keep making pollutants, so long as we don't let them get into our nation's environment. I've got half a dozen ideas, from selling our waste to gullible nations as fertilisers, to sticking some of the nastier chemical into new-flavour 'smokey-cola' and pushing it to export. Recategorise waste as product, and we can get it out of the country at a nice profit."
[effect]corrupt industrial practices are endemic in the nation
[stats]toxicity decreases a little, environmental beauty increases a little, eco-friendliness reduces, corruption increases a lot, niceness decreases, compassion decreases, beverage sales increases, economy increases a little
Last edited by Candlewhisper Archive on Sat Jan 16, 2016 10:41 am, edited 11 times in total.
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Leppikania
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Postby Leppikania » Thu Jan 14, 2016 7:08 am

Great draft! Although, for option three, I'm surprised you didn't have smoked meats.
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Candlewhisper Archive
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Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Thu Jan 14, 2016 11:12 am

Option 4, you mean? Didn't occur to me.

With the shady corporate practice option, I was mostly inspired by real life horror stories:

waste as fertiliser:
http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2002/05/ ... 63993.html
http://www.newfarm.org/depts/gleanings/ ... tter.shtml

waste dumping:
http://thesocietypages.org/sociologylen ... xic-waste/

toxic sodas:
http://www.fda.gov/Food/FoodborneIllnes ... 055815.htm
http://www.snopes.com/food/warnings/bvo.asp

Some good and bad science and political bias in those links, but the stories themselves are enough to give inspiration for issue options.
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Lenyo
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Postby Lenyo » Thu Jan 14, 2016 11:46 am

The description could involve a report by the health ministry, which is probably considered less biased than environmentalist groups.

Armani is a corporate name. Could you avoid it, or possibly parody the trademark somehow?

Why is the futurist wearing sweatpants? It's not a very interesting description.

The final [effect] should use the word epidemic, not endemic, most likely.
The oppressed are allowed once every few years to decide which particular
representatives of the oppressing class shall represent and repress them in parliament.

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Candlewhisper Archive
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Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Thu Jan 14, 2016 5:07 pm

Good points, will look into those. I like the report source changing. I can ditch the corporate name.

Re: the sweatpants, I have no idea. In fact, I have no idea why I choose a futurist as the speaker, when a transhumanist would have made more sense.

Epidemic / endemic though, I think I have picked the right word.

Epidemic is a noun, describing an outbreak of infectious disease. Endemic is an adjective, describing something being a widespread state within a location. "Endemic corruption" is a common alternate phrase for "systemic corruption".

Let me do some tweaks on the other items though...
Last edited by Candlewhisper Archive on Thu Jan 14, 2016 5:15 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Lenyo
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Postby Lenyo » Thu Jan 14, 2016 5:22 pm

Epidemic is often an adjective, meaning very widespread, using the rapid spread of a plague as a metaphor. Endemic, on the other hand, means local to an area. Descriptions of nature often say what animals/plants are endemic to a climate. So while endemic corruption is a phrase, nations that reprocess pollution as beverages likely exhibit epidemic corruption.
The oppressed are allowed once every few years to decide which particular
representatives of the oppressing class shall represent and repress them in parliament.

Lenin, State and Revolution (1917)

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Candlewhisper Archive
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Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Fri Jan 15, 2016 2:02 am

Epidemic can be an adjective, but its usually a noun. When used as an adjective, its almost always used as a quantifier.

"Corrupt industrial practices are epidemic in the nation" would be incorrect usage. On the other hand, "Corrupt industrial practices in the nation are at epidemic levels" would be acceptable.

However, "Corrupt industrial practices are endemic in the nation" is perfectly acceptable, as it indicates the nation as a locality distinct from the broader world at large.

So I'm happy with "Corrupt industrial practices are endemic in the nation", and as issue editors it'd be perfectly within your remit to edit it to "Corrupt industrial practices in the nation are at epidemic levels" if you find that more impactful. I certainly think "Corrupt industrial practices are epidemic in the nation" would be incorrect usage though.

Regarding the question of scale, I agree that putting pollutants in soft drinks is pretty damn corrupt, but then it is something that has been done by US soft drinks industries, and I wouldn't call that a nation with epidemic level corruption. I'd also say that epidemic and endemic aren't terms where one is bigger than the other, rather they just similar adjectives with different implications. Because of its origins, epidemic implies spread, and there's no particular reason that corruption of a nation would spread into other nations.

Trust me, I'm a doctor. These are words that are part of our general vocabulary.
Last edited by Candlewhisper Archive on Fri Jan 15, 2016 2:05 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Lenyo
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Postby Lenyo » Fri Jan 15, 2016 8:04 am

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:
Epidemic can be an adjective, but its usually a noun. When used as an adjective, its almost always used as a quantifier.

"Corrupt industrial practices are epidemic in the nation" would be incorrect usage. On the other hand, "Corrupt industrial practices in the nation are at epidemic levels" would be acceptable.

However, "Corrupt industrial practices are endemic in the nation" is perfectly acceptable, as it indicates the nation as a locality distinct from the broader world at large.

So I'm happy with "Corrupt industrial practices are endemic in the nation", and as issue editors it'd be perfectly within your remit to edit it to "Corrupt industrial practices in the nation are at epidemic levels" if you find that more impactful. I certainly think "Corrupt industrial practices are epidemic in the nation" would be incorrect usage though.

Regarding the question of scale, I agree that putting pollutants in soft drinks is pretty damn corrupt, but then it is something that has been done by US soft drinks industries, and I wouldn't call that a nation with epidemic level corruption. I'd also say that epidemic and endemic aren't terms where one is bigger than the other, rather they just similar adjectives with different implications. Because of its origins, epidemic implies spread, and there's no particular reason that corruption of a nation would spread into other nations.

Trust me, I'm a doctor. These are words that are part of our general vocabulary.

OK, I trust your judgement. Meanwhile, back on the ranch,
Sure, they might have increased risk of fatal brain haemorrhage in puberty, but they'll expand their cognition and consciousness, and become better than human.

Unfortunately we don't italicize in editing, so you'll need to find another way to emphasize just how much better the chems might make the kids.

This is a very high-quality draft, and it's timely given what's happening in Flint.
The oppressed are allowed once every few years to decide which particular
representatives of the oppressing class shall represent and repress them in parliament.

Lenin, State and Revolution (1917)

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Candlewhisper Archive
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Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Fri Jan 15, 2016 10:17 am

Thanks for the tip, have edited the italicised part. Fortunately the shift from futurist to transhumanist makes that easy, as I can now borrow their terminology.

You know, I hadn't heard about Flint, but have now googled it, and you're right, I do seem to have been accidentally topical.
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Lenyo
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Postby Lenyo » Fri Jan 15, 2016 10:38 am

This draft is fabulous. Submit whenever you're ready.
The oppressed are allowed once every few years to decide which particular
representatives of the oppressing class shall represent and repress them in parliament.

Lenin, State and Revolution (1917)

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Annihilators of Chan Island
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Postby Annihilators of Chan Island » Fri Jan 15, 2016 4:09 pm

I think others have cleaned it nicely. I now look forward to seeing this in my inbox!
This nation is modeled on being my absolute worst dystopia imaginable. In no way do the Annihilators reflect my opinions, in fact I am totally against almost every single policy they enact.
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Bears Armed
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Postby Bears Armed » Sat Jan 16, 2016 9:09 am

Lenyo wrote:Armani is a corporate name. Could you avoid it, or possibly parody the trademark somehow?

My ambassador at the WA wears 'Arbeari'...

^_^
The Confrederated Clans (and other Confrederated Bodys) of the Free Bears of Bears Armed
(includes The Ursine NorthLands) Demonym = Bear[s]; adjective = ‘Urrsish’.
Population = just under 20 million. Economy = only Thriving. Average Life expectancy = c.60 years. If the nation is classified as 'Anarchy' there still is a [strictly limited] national government... and those aren't "biker gangs", they're traditional cross-Clan 'Warrior Societies', generally respected rather than feared.
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Candlewhisper Archive
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Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Sat Jan 16, 2016 10:41 am

Now submitted.Thanks all for feedback.
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Lenyo
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Postby Lenyo » Sat Jan 16, 2016 11:00 am

Bears Armed wrote:My ambassador at the WA wears 'Arbeari'...

^_^

On a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you want that pun to appear in the dilemma?
The oppressed are allowed once every few years to decide which particular
representatives of the oppressing class shall represent and repress them in parliament.

Lenin, State and Revolution (1917)

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Candlewhisper Archive
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Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Sat Jan 16, 2016 1:39 pm

I don't get it.
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Lenyo
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Postby Lenyo » Sat Jan 16, 2016 1:41 pm

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:I don't get it.

That's a good argument against the Arbeari pun.
The oppressed are allowed once every few years to decide which particular
representatives of the oppressing class shall represent and repress them in parliament.

Lenin, State and Revolution (1917)

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Annihilators of Chan Island
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Postby Annihilators of Chan Island » Sat Jan 16, 2016 3:33 pm

Lenyo wrote:
Candlewhisper Archive wrote:I don't get it.

That's a good argument against the Arbeari pun.


I for one want it in there on a strength of 8/10. I like it, but can accept it without. "Bear"ly. *gets assaulted by a drummer*
This nation is modeled on being my absolute worst dystopia imaginable. In no way do the Annihilators reflect my opinions, in fact I am totally against almost every single policy they enact.
I support insanely high tax rates, do you?

I honestly really like to write issues.

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Candlewhisper Archive
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Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Mon Jan 18, 2016 6:36 am

Come on, don't leave me hanging. What's the Arbeari reference?

Is it just in reference to your nation name?
Last edited by Candlewhisper Archive on Mon Jan 18, 2016 6:37 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Gnejs
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Postby Gnejs » Mon Jan 18, 2016 7:25 am

Likely, yes. An alternative could be 'Arladi'.

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Omigodtheykilledkenny
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Postby Omigodtheykilledkenny » Mon Jan 18, 2016 12:52 pm

It's been called the "Undersec'y of State for Creative Solutions" or the "Minister for Creative Solutions" before; I'm sure you can borrow that title for your "solutions manager." 8)
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Bears Armed
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Postby Bears Armed » Tue Jan 19, 2016 10:06 am

Lenyo wrote:
Bears Armed wrote:My ambassador at the WA wears 'Arbeari'...

^_^

On a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you want that pun to appear in the dilemma?

About 5, I think.

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:I don't get it.

A firm of men makes Armani; a firm of Bears makes Arbeari...

(The fIrm in question isn't actually based in Bears Armed, by the way, although it does do much of its current business here: Its head office is actually in the city of Baree, the capital of our rather smaller [but proudly independent, nevertheless...] neighbour Roumberre.)
The Confrederated Clans (and other Confrederated Bodys) of the Free Bears of Bears Armed
(includes The Ursine NorthLands) Demonym = Bear[s]; adjective = ‘Urrsish’.
Population = just under 20 million. Economy = only Thriving. Average Life expectancy = c.60 years. If the nation is classified as 'Anarchy' there still is a [strictly limited] national government... and those aren't "biker gangs", they're traditional cross-Clan 'Warrior Societies', generally respected rather than feared.
Author of some GA Resolutions, via Bears Armed Mission; subject of an SC resolution.
Factbook. We have more than 70 MAPS. Visitors' Guide.
The IDU's WA Drafting Room is open to help you.
Author of issues #429, 712, 729, 934, 1120, 1152, 1474, 1521.

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Candlewhisper Archive
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Founded: Aug 28, 2015
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Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Tue Jan 19, 2016 12:58 pm

Thought it was just a reference to your nation.

That in mind, doesn't make much sense for it to be included in an issue aimed at all nations.
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Leppikania
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Postby Leppikania » Tue Jan 19, 2016 12:59 pm

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:Thought it was just a reference to your nation.

That in mind, doesn't make much sense for it to be included in an issue aimed at all nations.

Remember that the @@DEMONYMNOUN@@ macro exists.
INTP, -4.25 Economic Left/Right, -4.1 Social Libertarian/Authoritarian, tastes like chicken.
I do use NS stats, thank you very much.
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Bears Armed
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Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Bears Armed » Thu Jan 21, 2016 11:14 am

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:That in mind, doesn't make much sense for it to be included in an issue aimed at all nations.

They export, too... just as, in RL, Armani doesn't operate solely within Italy...
The Confrederated Clans (and other Confrederated Bodys) of the Free Bears of Bears Armed
(includes The Ursine NorthLands) Demonym = Bear[s]; adjective = ‘Urrsish’.
Population = just under 20 million. Economy = only Thriving. Average Life expectancy = c.60 years. If the nation is classified as 'Anarchy' there still is a [strictly limited] national government... and those aren't "biker gangs", they're traditional cross-Clan 'Warrior Societies', generally respected rather than feared.
Author of some GA Resolutions, via Bears Armed Mission; subject of an SC resolution.
Factbook. We have more than 70 MAPS. Visitors' Guide.
The IDU's WA Drafting Room is open to help you.
Author of issues #429, 712, 729, 934, 1120, 1152, 1474, 1521.


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