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[Art] The Anti-Issue

A place to spoil daily issues for those who haven't had them yet, snigger at typos, and discuss ideas for new ones.
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Tailor Swift
Civilian
 
Posts: 1
Founded: Jan 17, 2025
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

[Art] The Anti-Issue

Postby Tailor Swift » Fri Jan 17, 2025 12:16 am

Title - The Anti-Issue
The Issue - It's Me. Hi. I'm The Issue. It's Me. Tales as old as time. Specially tailored, swift to answer. I have this thing where your nation gets older but your leader never wiser. All my options come with prices and vices, your nation ending up in crises...

Option 1 - Did you notice the covert narcissism I disguise as altruism in some kind of congressman? Yet nobody agrees! All of the issues you've ghosted are gathering dust in your inbox, never dismissed. Just enough to prevent your nation's doom - once every 48 hours.
result - @@LEADER@@ receives an issue every two days.

Option 2 - The editors laugh at us from hell. You think I'm here on good will, yet I am the monster in your feed. I wake you up screaming every day. It must be exhausting always rooting through these issues. Once a day I'll watch you as you're leaving for work...
result - @@LEADER@@ receives an issue every day.

Option 3 - Dreaming of an easter egg? Slowly lurching toward unlocking your new capital city? Matters too big to hang out in your inbox for long. Maybe kill some time both midnights and afternoons.
result - @@LEADER@@ receives an issue twice daily.

Option 4 - The family gathers ‘round and reads me. Some scream, others laugh and put their leaders through hell. I imagine many card farmers autoclick through me for money. Your obsessions extend to the graveyard shift. I'll make you stare directly at the screen at least four times daily.
result - @@LEADER@@ is overrun with issues.

Option 5 - Sometimes I feel like every leader is a sketchy and whiny baby. Look in the mirror! I should not be available on any of your devices. Put me on hold with vacation mode.
result - @@LEADER@@'s got issues?

Option 6 - Watch you leaving 'cause you got tired of my scheming - for the last time. Pierce your nation in the heart and let it be killed to an apocalyptic fireball; ah, it's time, to finally CTE.
result -
Last edited by Tailor Swift on Fri Jan 17, 2025 12:46 am, edited 6 times in total.

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Alkzine
Envoy
 
Posts: 235
Founded: Nov 12, 2012
Liberal Democratic Socialists

Postby Alkzine » Fri Jan 17, 2025 3:09 am

da fuccccc ?
שמע ישראל ד אלוקינו ד אחד | Listen, Jews: Hashem is Our G-d; Hashem Is The Only One | אין עוד מלבדו | There Is Nothing Other Than G-d | ועשיתה את הטוב ואת הישר | You Must Do What Is Good and Straight| אלוקים עשה את האדם ישר והמה ביקשו חשבונות רבים | G-d Made Man Upright, But They Made Excuses | ובחרתה בחיים | Choose To Live

טוב טעם ודעת למדני כי במצוותיך האמנתי | Teach Me Logic And Understanding, For I Have Been Faithful To Your Commandments

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Verdant Haven
Director of Content
 
Posts: 3526
Founded: Feb 26, 2013
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Verdant Haven » Fri Jan 17, 2025 10:27 am

Art, if this can be called that, belongs in Arts & Fiction.

Locked.


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