VALIDITY: Has both "Child Self-Rearing" and "Vegetarianism"
OPTION ONE: "Obviously children break the law when sent out on their own!" notes your Minister of Logistics, @@RANDOMNAME@@. "I'm honestly baffled that we thought kids raising themselves in the woods was a good idea! Clearly, we must end this practice and place our children in classrooms to emphasize how to be a functioning member of society, including the importance of the law, and we stop placing their lives in danger."
EFFECT ONE: learning to enjoy broccoli is part of the national curriculum
OPTION TWO: "I agree that it is an inequitable standard we have set, but that doesn't mean sending them into the woods is altogether wrong," observes @@RANDOMNAME@@, psychologist and author of the recent book My Time in the Lion's Den. "These kids are placed in an environment where they have to learn to live alone, and often fall under the tutelage of various animals, many of whom do not themselves adhere to vegetarianism. It is only logical that these kids follow their adopted parents of lions, tigers, and bears, and we must give them an exception from the law while they remain estranged from society."
EFFECT TWO: laws are considered optional if you're surrounded by trees
OPTION THREE: "How many times do I have to emphasize the importance of law and order," questions @@RANDOMNAME@@, your special advisor on cuisine-related crimes. "Ignorance is never an excuse for breaking the law, and these kids are no exception. Let's give kids a brief pamphlet describing what is and is not allowed before we send them out on their own, and if they break any of our sacred laws and, say, eat some meat, we can properly punish them upon their return."
EFFECT THREE: children are expected to invent agriculture while in the woods
OPTION FOUR: "Meat! Meat! Meat!" chants a young child currently reintegrating into society, who obviously got accustomed to the taste of meat while in the wilderness. "Me want meat! @@LEADER@@, where keep meat! Bring me meat, for me to eat! No more yucky plants! Meat for me, all meet meat! Meat!"
EFFECT FOUR: children can often be seen scavenging for roadkill
I'm slowly trying to get the drafts that have built up on the forums rather than letting them sit around, and I finally got some sort of half-passing title for this so I figured I'd go ahead and post it!