Hilarious histories

[Lanansia]

I thought I’d make this thread so we could discuss some of the funniest or otherwise interesting history factoids.

There’s a ton of weird facts in the 5,000 years of recorded history, so tell us about some of them! For example, that one time Pope Gregory IX declared war on cats, believing that they bore satan’s spirit. History is absolutely wild, and show us just how wild it is!

[New Saharia]

If I recall, this ended up being a major contributor to a plague which swept through the land, mainly carried by rats. Since there was a dramatic drop in cat populations - the natural predators of mice and rodents - the plague was able to spread much more rapidly through Europe, gaining a foothold in Italy.

[San Lumen]

On November 2nd 1889 President Benjamin Harrison signed the proclamation admitting North and South Dakota to the Union.

The fierce rivalry between them presented a dilemma as to which to admit first. Harrison ordered Secretary of State James Blaine to shuffle the papers and obscure from him which one he was signing first. The actual order was unrecorded thus it remains an enigma which Dakota was admitted first.

[Ineva]

Might want to expand the OP if you don't want this locked.

[Eahland]

I'm just going to mention The Emu War right now, so that all of the dozens of other people that go, "Hey guyz what about that time Australia fought a war against emus and lost," will reveal themselves as not having actually read even the first page of the thread.

[The Archregimancy]

Might want to expand the OP if you don't want this locked.

I'll allow it; it's not a particularly detailed OP, but it outlines a valid discussion topic and offers an example of the type of event under discussion.

Modesty no doubt prevents me from pointing out that it's not an original topic, but it's an entirely valid one - and better to start a new discussion than try and gravedig a past thread.

But I do find mentions of the 'Great Emu War' particularly unoriginal. It was just an unsuccessful pest management initiative that was given a slightly hyperbolic name by local media.

[Confederate States 0f America]

Probably the Atlantic service for the USS William D. Porter, an American destroyer during WW2, while escorting the Iowa that was taking FRD to North Africa.

Her anchor, while departing port, tore the railing and lifeboat mounts off another destroyer.

Accidentally had live depth charges roll off her deck which made the ships take evasive maneuvers, believing they were under u-boat attack.

While engaging in a simulated torpedo attack accidentally launched a live torpedo at the USS Iowa. And communicated incorrect warnings and information on the direction of the torpedo and who launched it, to the Iowa so much so the Iowa trained all her guns on the destroyer, believing there may have been a mutiny.


As a result of this incident, US ships would routinely greet the destroyer with the joke "Don't shoot! We're Republicans!" on account of Roosevelt being a Democrat.

There’s more to the story but talk about some shenanigans.

[Confederate States 0f America]

By far the most hilarious would have to be the Russian’s Baltic Fleet’s expedition to Korea during the Russo-Japanese War. “Are those British fishing ships in the North Sea? No, they’re Japanese torpedo boats, Open Fire”. “Are those our ships or Japanese torpedo boats? Open fire!”

[Corporate Collective Salvation]

I'm just going to mention The Emu War right now, so that all of the dozens of other people that go, "Hey guyz what about that time Australia fought a war against emus and lost," will reveal themselves as not having actually read even the first page of the thread.

Just par for the course for people who imported many of their own problems with ill considered flora and the fauna.
Starting with the rabbit.

Flip the script, and there is this neat, tough little tree that grows sparsely in the outback.
Might see one in every forty square kms, or so.
A brilliant yank transplanted one to the Everglades region of Florida.
In short order, tracts of marsh and swamp were nearly sucked dry by dense thickets of these things that cannot even be walked through.

[The Web Citadel]

after the second world war in 1945, the rootes group (owned by sir william rootes) went to inspect a factory where the germans had been building motor vehicles. rootes said the vehicle the factory had been designing was "unattractive to the average motor buyer", "a completely uneconomic enterprise" and the project "would fail within two years".

that factory was volkswagen's factory in wolfsburg, and the car they had been designing was the beetle, which would go on to become the best selling car of all time by the time it had ceased production of its original run in 2003.

[San Lumen]

Prior to 1867 the capital of Nebraska was Omaha.

Before the vote to remove the capital city from Omaha, Omaha Senator J. N. H. Patrick made a last-ditch effort to derail the move by having the future capital city named after recently assassinated President Abraham Lincoln.

Many of the people south of the Platte River had been sympathetic to the Confederate cause in the recently concluded Civil War. It was assumed that senators south of the river would not vote to pass the measure if the future capital was named after Lincoln. In the end, the motion to name the future capital city Lincoln was ineffective in blocking the measure and the vote to move the capital south of the Platte was successful, with the passage of the Removal Act in 1867.

The village of Lancaster was chosen as the new capital and renamed Lincoln.

[Ineva]

Might want to expand the OP if you don't want this locked.

I'll allow it; it's not a particularly detailed OP, but it outlines a valid discussion topic and offers an example of the type of event under discussion.

Modesty no doubt prevents me from pointing out that it's not an original topic, but it's an entirely valid one - and better to start a new discussion than try and gravedig a past thread.

But I do find mentions of the 'Great Emu War' particularly unoriginal. It was just an unsuccessful pest management initiative that was given a slightly hyperbolic name by local media.

OP has been expanded since I last made the comment. Glad it is allowed nevertheless.

[Ethel mermania]

As I say in all of these. The civilization of the ancient Egyptians astounds me. Your wife gets her period, you get a paid day off

[Haganham]

The entirety of the Pig War is a comedy of errors. And no one was hurt, so you don't even need to feel bad about laughing about.

[Elejamie]

Copying and pasting this from the last thread on this (albeit with a slight correction) but, basically, the time Napoleon was defeated by rabbits. You thought Australia losing the Emu War was bad, it has nothing on this. One Summer, he decided to have a rabbit hunt to celebrate signing a bunch of treaties to end a war and invited some top brass to join him. Except, instead of wild hares, his chief of staff accidentally brought hundreds if not thousands of tame bunnies. So what do they do when they see a short French guy with a funny hat and an itchy armpit (who was none of those things except for an occasional hat wearer*)? They charged right at him expecting to be fed. Napoleon and his mates found it funny at first but eventually they had to bail because some of them latched onto his legs and his co-hunters couldn't shake them off. And even then the rabbits still chased his coach, with a few even making it on.

It probably didn't help that his brother Louis Napoleon accidentally dubbed himself the "Konijn van 'Olland" ("Rabbit of 'Olland") the year before when he was crowned the King ("Koning") of Holland. So, you know, foreshadowing.

*He was born in Corsica after it was ceded to France but his family was originally from Tuscany. It's... complicated.

[Corporate Collective Salvation]

As I say in all of these. The civilization of the ancient Egyptians astounds me. Your wife gets her period, you get a paid day off

Makes perfect sense, really.
You married her, it is on you.
Political expediency at its finest.
Not like you could effectively police that kind of potential violence with bronze age warriors, anyway.

[Almighty Biden]

Of course there's that time Pres. John Quincy Adams wouldn't talk to a reporter, so when he went skinny dipping in the Potomac she sat on his clothes until he did an interview. I figure that was probably the most embarrassing press incident to ever happen to a president.

[The Archregimancy]

As I say in all of these. The civilization of the ancient Egyptians astounds me. Your wife gets her period, you get a paid day off

Clearly you've been reading Rosalind Janssen's book chapter 'A valid excuse for a day off work; Menstruation in an ancient Egyptian village' in the 2021 book Bodily Fluids in Antiquity (Edited By Mark Bradley, Victoria Leonard, Laurence Totelin).

ABSTRACT

Judging by their gynaecological papyri, the ancient Egyptians were only too well aware of amenorrhoea and menopause; this implies that menstruation functioned as an important life event in a relatively short fertile interlude. This contribution focuses on Deir el-Medina, the New Kingdom desert village of Pharaoh’s artisans on the West Bank of Modern Luxor. Here, menstruation was advertised as a public event. Drawing together a wide range of evidence—from laundry lists, which detail the washing of soiled sanitary towels, to a large attendance register now on display in the British Museum—it argues that the behaviour of women and men was intricately interconnected by means of the menstrual cycle. This physical event demanded a practical intervention: the start of the monthly periods of their wives, daughters, or even daughters-in-law sometimes constituted a valid excuse for the men to take a day off from their construction work in the Valley of the Kings. Despite a reference to ‘the place of women’, the chapter further argues that there was neither menstrual synchrony nor a general taboo regarding contact with menstruating women in this village. Yet corresponding to the overarching question posed by this volume, there was at the same time an avoidance of menstrual blood. A simplistic explanation from daily life is proffered: that of male anxieties when faced with what was in this community the rare occurrence of their menstruating wives and daughters.

Though note that the evidence here is entirely based on the New Kingdom; we shouldn't assume this applies to other periods across the long panoply of Egyptian civilisation.

[Corporate Collective Salvation]

Bessie Braddock MP: “Winston, you are drunk, and what’s more you are disgustingly drunk.”

WSC: “Bessie, my dear, you are ugly, and what’s more, you are disgustingly ugly. But tomorrow
I shall be sober and you will still be disgustingly ugly.”

[Ethel mermania]

As I say in all of these. The civilization of the ancient Egyptians astounds me. Your wife gets her period, you get a paid day off

Clearly you've been reading Rosalind Janssen's book chapter 'A valid excuse for a day off work; Menstruation in an ancient Egyptian village' in the 2021 book Bodily Fluids in Antiquity (Edited By Mark Bradley, Victoria Leonard, Laurence Totelin).

ABSTRACT

Judging by their gynaecological papyri, the ancient Egyptians were only too well aware of amenorrhoea and menopause; this implies that menstruation functioned as an important life event in a relatively short fertile interlude. This contribution focuses on Deir el-Medina, the New Kingdom desert village of Pharaoh’s artisans on the West Bank of Modern Luxor. Here, menstruation was advertised as a public event. Drawing together a wide range of evidence—from laundry lists, which detail the washing of soiled sanitary towels, to a large attendance register now on display in the British Museum—it argues that the behaviour of women and men was intricately interconnected by means of the menstrual cycle. This physical event demanded a practical intervention: the start of the monthly periods of their wives, daughters, or even daughters-in-law sometimes constituted a valid excuse for the men to take a day off from their construction work in the Valley of the Kings. Despite a reference to ‘the place of women’, the chapter further argues that there was neither menstrual synchrony nor a general taboo regarding contact with menstruating women in this village. Yet corresponding to the overarching question posed by this volume, there was at the same time an avoidance of menstrual blood. A simplistic explanation from daily life is proffered: that of male anxieties when faced with what was in this community the rare occurrence of their menstruating wives and daughters.

Though note that the evidence here is entirely based on the New Kingdom; we shouldn't assume this applies to other periods across the long panoply of Egyptian civilisation.

One of my favorite things about the new kingdom is they had people doing your job researching the old kingdom

[Dakran]

Clearly you've been reading Rosalind Janssen's book chapter 'A valid excuse for a day off work; Menstruation in an ancient Egyptian village' in the 2021 book Bodily Fluids in Antiquity (Edited By Mark Bradley, Victoria Leonard, Laurence Totelin).



Though note that the evidence here is entirely based on the New Kingdom; we shouldn't assume this applies to other periods across the long panoply of Egyptian civilisation.

One of my favorite things about the new kingdom is they had people doing your job researching the old kingdom

Egypt pioneering Egyptology is funny to think about in its own right as it is. Your society is so damn old, you have an entire industry focused on digging up ancient artifacts of your own people. And we're STILL doing it. Its wild.

[Corporate Collective Salvation]

Egypt pioneering Egyptology is funny to think about in its own right as it is. Your society is so damn old, you have an entire industry focused on digging up ancient artifacts of your own people. And we're STILL doing it. Its wild.

I am reminded of some ancient cultures, notably Hellenic, that put fossil remains on haphazard display, and used the jigsaw exhibits as a forensic base for the creatures of their mythology.

[Almighty Biden]

Bessie Braddock MP: “Winston, you are drunk, and what’s more you are disgustingly drunk.”

WSC: “Bessie, my dear, you are ugly, and what’s more, you are disgustingly ugly. But tomorrow
I shall be sober and you will still be disgustingly ugly.”

Reminds me of the story falsely attributed to Churchill and Lady Astor

[Bacopa]

World War Two German submarine sinks itself by flushing a toilet

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LpD7ZqGWncM

[Diarcesia]

The first Roman king is Romulus. The first Roman Emperor is Augustus. The last Western Roman Emperor is Romulus Augustulus.

Constantine is traditionally held as the first Eastern Roman Emperor. The last Eastern Roman Emperor is also Constantine.

Rome started as a city in 753 BC, it also ended as a city (Constantinople aka New Rome) in 1453 AD.