[title]Safety Dance
[desc]Your Minister for Workplace Conditions recently issued an official music video explaining what workers and employers can do to promote safe conditions at work. Public reaction to the Health and Safety Hop has, suffice to say, not been particularly enthusiastic.
[validity]must not ban dancing (Option 1596.4)
[option]"I honestly thought it would be a good idea, but it just didn't pan out," explains @@RANDOMNAME@@, the Minister in question. "Yes, I know that two of my backup dancers fainted, I can't bust moves for toffee and that fire was an electrical fault with the stereo system rather than some pre-planned rap about why your business needs clearly-marked fire exits. But please - please - let me release at least one video, every few months, about the dangers facing people while they work. I know that music can be a really effective form of public outreach. Why can't it be edifying, rather than comedic?"
[effect]electricians working on streetlamps have been urged to dance the night away
[option]"This was a waste of government time, resources, and sanity," remarks @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Under-Secretary for Efficiency. "What was supposed to be, in theory, a means of raising awareness about safe working conditions proved, in fact, to be an utter travesty. Even my brother, who works in a heavy goods warehouse, says he's learned nothing from it. From now on, all reports relating to matters of life and death - such as the very things the Minister was trying to make a point about - should be written, not performed, in formal, serious prose. If that works, we can extend it to other government communications as well."
[effect]health advice can only be given out by a PhD
[option]"Our leaders should be an example to the nation, and your colleague set the worst example possible," fumes @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@, stay-at-home mother of eight and staunch social conservative. "We need to ban music, dancing, and all other public entertainments, and promote proper manners in society as well. Hopefully then, people will learn to behave, rather than being encouraged to make fools out of themselves in front of other people."
[effect]supermarket cashiers run the risk of arrest for "vigorous movements"
