[SUBMITTED DRAFT] Palate Torture

[New Anarchisticstan]

New issue draft I came up with. We need more food oriented issues. Anyway, you know the drill: tell me if there are any mistakes in this issue that I should fix, and I will go right on.

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Title: Palate Torture
Description:
After what was supposed to be a banquet with Daguò officials turned into a show of convulsing faces and a multitude of "yucks", furious and posh Dàguóren state chefs, with support from your Minister of Gastronomy, are pleading you to do something about @@NATION@@'s embarrassing meals.
Validity: Invalid for nations with a food quality of above 40, invalid for isolationist nations with no foreign conferences/diplomatic relations, and probably invalid for nations that impose vegeterianism .

Choice 1:
"The potatoes are minuscule and impossible to work with, and the tomatoes are all irregularly shaped!" yells celebrity chef Ankohl Rojer, while setting a wok with rice on fire and waving it around. "Give the farmers some extra cash, and maybe they'd be able to care for and fertilise their plants!".
Fallout:
tweezers aren't required anymore to make french fries.

Choice 2:
"It's not the ingredients; it's the way they are prepared" interjects restaurateur Korton Lamsey, while spraying a fire extinguisher everywhere. "The chefs throughout your nation have no idea what sous vide means, they think ketchup's the only type of sauce, and they use pans to boil damn milk! Pay us experts into giving these culinary amateurs mandatory cooking classes, or they'll be dumber than the lamb they're grilling!".
Fallout:
opening a hotdog stand is harder than achieving a doctorate.

Choice 3:
Suddenly, your office door breaks, revealing a shadowy cloaked figure riding a cow. Before you could process the situation, the man starts to speak. "Ommmm, one has heard your materialistic complaints... Ommmm, food is a pleasure diverging you from praying to the Lord. Ommmm, make everything inappetisin-" he says, before being shot with a tranquilliser.
Fallout:
the finest dining experience in @@NATION@@ is chakra-infested grass.

[Australian rePublic]

Chefs generally like rare meat

[Fifth Jellian Republic]

Choice number 3 might offend some people.
Assuming wife or mother does cooking, “it does not please you?”

Also in choice number one, perhaps a better rewording of the about-to-be-mentioned sentence is this:
“The potatoes are as bland as a frozen convince store’s”

Also also, in choice number one, perhaps there is a better way to say,
“Give these farmers some more money, and at least they will bother to water their plants”
But I can’t think of one right now.

Also also also, for the consequence of choice number one, I recommend something more along the lines of:
“Farmers refuse to produce without government “encouragement” or maybe
“Farming is a lucrative business”
Just to show the more broader effects, and to highlight any comically negative effects, of a possible stimulus

And finally, in choice number 2, perhaps the consequences sentence could be better worded as:
“Opening a hotdog stand is harder than earning a doctorate”

Other than those observations, I think this is a great issue.

[New Anarchisticstan]

Choice number 3 might offend some people.
Assuming wife or mother does cooking, “it does not please you?”

Also in choice number one, perhaps a better rewording of the about-to-be-mentioned sentence is this:
“The potatoes are as bland as a frozen convince store’s”

Also also, in choice number one, perhaps there is a better way to say,
“Give these farmers some more money, and at least they will bother to water their plants”
But I can’t think of one right now.

Also also also, for the consequence of choice number one, I recommend something more along the lines of:
“Farmers refuse to produce without government “encouragement” or maybe
“Farming is a lucrative business”
Just to show the more broader effects, and to highlight any comically negative effects, of a possible stimulus

And finally, in choice number 2, perhaps the consequences sentence could be better worded as:
“Opening a hotdog stand is harder than earning a doctorate”

Other than those observations, I think this is a great issue.

The hotdog suggestion I will adopt, and I will think about the others. Thank you so much
Edit: I have edited the first fallout. Puns are always good material. I removed the wife part, but some internal part of me does not want to remove the mother part. I do not think it's offensive.
As for the potato comparison, I replaced the convenience store part with "frozen ones". It's shorter. I also worded the phrase about giving farmers money differently.

Chefs generally like rare meat

Oh, and thanks for the fallout 1 idea. Medium rare's better.

[New Anarchisticstan]

any more errors or should i go on last call?

[Fifth Jellian Republic]

“Give the farmers some extra cash, and atleast they'll bother to water their plants".
I think this sentence may still be problematic

The most minimal fix would be to “replace” and with “so”
“Give the farmers some extra cash, so at least they can bother to water their own plants “

Also, for choice number 3

I think the sentence about the radio could possibly be better worded as:
“Suddenly, an add plays on the radio that you could have sworn was off”

Also, I would recommend changing “you own cooking does not please you? Or it is your mothers?” Into something like:
“Sick of home cooking?”

But other than that, it’s a great issue

[New Anarchisticstan]

“Give the farmers some extra cash, and atleast they'll bother to water their plants".
I think this sentence may still be problematic

The most minimal fix would be to “replace” and with “so”
“Give the farmers some extra cash, so at least they can bother to water their own plants “

Also, for choice number 3

I think the sentence about the radio could possibly be better worded as:
“Suddenly, an add plays on the radio what you could have sworn was off”

Also, I would recommend changing “you own cooking does not please you? Or it is your mothers?” Into something like:
“Sick of home cooking?”

But other than that, it’s a great issue

Understood, I'll get editing
As for the farmers one, I think 'and' fits better. It gives that slight arrogant tone, don't know how to explain. Will look into that further.

[Australian rePublic]

Way too soon to submit. Give it a couple of weeks

[Hispida]

uncle roger reference, fuiyoh!

seconding that it's a bit early to submit. regardless, i like this draft so expect me to pop in from time to time.

[New Anarchisticstan]

Way too soon to submit. Give it a couple of weeks

My impatience can't be beaten. Of course my father didn't last either. Maybe I should've added some MSG

[Australian rePublic]

Way too soon to submit. Give it a couple of weeks

My impatience can't be beaten. Of course my father didn't last either. Maybe I should've added some MSG

Ask the issue editors to see if they're willing to delete your draft

[New Anarchisticstan]

My impatience can't be beaten. Of course my father didn't last either. Maybe I should've added some MSG

Ask the issue editors to see if they're willing to delete your draft

Do I open a thread on the got issues forums or do I use mod contact?
Meanwhile I'm editing the post title to DRAFT again.

[New Anarchisticstan]

/bumps cutely

[New Anarchisticstan]

/bump
Sorry for the other bump but if 2 weeks pass by and I get no new suggestions or feedback then waiting this much would've been useless

[Verdant Haven]

/bump
Sorry for the other bump but if 2 weeks pass by and I get no new suggestions or feedback then waiting this much would've been useless

It was three days. Patience, please.

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- At the moment, we have options that describe uninspired food, but a dilemma that describes severe food poisoning. What's would you say actually happened here? If people were simply bored by blasé beef and vexed by vapid vegetables, a more ho-hum reaction would seem appropriate in the description. If, on the other hand, people were indeed being made nauseous, and forced into undignified sprints for overused lavs, then the options should probably reflect solutions to that problem instead.

- The first option describes bland potatoes and rare steak, and the proposed solution is... farm subsidies? The complaint doesn't say anything about ingredient quality – those are preparation problems. The outcome of a complaint about rare steak is then... rare steak? That is also a preparation-based outcome – how long a chef cooks a steak is not controlled by the rancher who raised the cow.

- Option two takes a reasonable direction, but needs to be made a bit more interesting in terms of descriptions and characterization.

- I'm not sure what problem the option three radio advert is addressing. If the nation's top chefs are churning out dross, presumably the fast food is similarly lacking, and would not offer an improvement in either palatability or food safety. One the description has been updated to be whatever it is going to be, this can be tweaked to reflect a response to that scenario. Presumably this is the "who cares about food quality?" option, which is totally fine – it just needs to find its place within a clearly-framed scenario.

[New Anarchisticstan]

Hello, edited the 2 choices lightly, and I completely replaced the third choice with the classic crazy third option. I am kind of unsure whether the third choice is worded correctly, but I am mostly confident for the rest.
(also sorry for the bumps, I am going to bump only once a week if needed, and thanks for the help).

[Bears Armed]

https://fancyclopedia.org/Bouncing_Potatoes

[New Anarchisticstan]

Yum yum I evoke the /bump

[New Anarchisticstan]

/bump i am mentally insein

[New Anarchisticstan]

/bump edited the title because I am desperate

[Verdant Haven]

- The description could use something a little more precise than just somebody who "has decided to consult you" – you're the Leader, after all. Perhaps they've come to plead their case? It might also be helpful to explain how the posh foreign chefs were gathered for this purpose.

- Choice 1 continues to have the same problem as before. Farm subsidies do not have anything to do with the problem described by the speaker. Whether a farmer "feeds their plants" is unrelated to whether the potatoes get exposed to too much light and go green, or to whether a chef cooks a steak to an acceptable internal temperature. One is a storage issue and one is a preparation issue, but the solution addressed neither.

- Choice 2 is a reasonable approach, but probably needs just a couple more specifics about what's being done. Are the culinary amateurs being forced into classes only the state chefs who screwed up dinner, or is it every chef in the nation? If only the state chefs, than why the hotdog stand problem? If every chef, then who is teaching them?

- Choice 3 is too far into the realm of whacko, without any explanation for how or why. Outside of something like an Easter Egg, cows factually do not talk. Either something needs to be presented to reference this being a really bad hallucination triggered by... I don't know what... or else it's probably the rider who should be speaking. One can also not assume any kind of holy purpose, so there would need to be an argument for that to be accepted, rather than an assumption that it exists.

[New Anarchisticstan]

Changed choice 1 to subsidising luxury ingredients, fallout changed too. Added the "chefs in your nation" and "pay us experts" part into choice 2 to include every chef and specify who's training them. In choice 3 I just highlighted that the man was speaking, then I added the phrase 'food diverges you from praying to the Lord" bla bla. Wow, making an issue sure is hard work.

[Australian rePublic]

Why is this happening now and not, say, twenty years ago

[New Anarchisticstan]

Why is this happening now and not, say, twenty years ago

I do not think that part is important because many issues just randomly pop up without specifying those details, though I'll look into that. What about a part highlighting how it harmed Daguoren-@@DENONYM@@ foreign relations, or highlighting how this problem happened in past banquets and a solution must be found?

[Australian rePublic]

If your issues is poor chefs, then hire new chefs