by The Finntopian Empire » Sat Aug 13, 2022 11:45 pm
by Daarwyrth » Thu Aug 25, 2022 2:48 am
Places of worships turnout is at an all-time low,
and many older citizens lament over the current perceived lack of religiousness.
Leftist speaker, @RANDOMNAME@ is the first to let their opinion become known, skipping into your office while looking depressed at the same time.
@@leader@@ has announced it's time to "chill out" and "be cool" when it comes to religion.
Before you answer, he continues
he stands there, waiting for your agreement with the plan, which he believes is irrefutable.
People peacefully practising their religion have been labelled as terrorists and locked up after the recent ban on religion
[option 3] "This may sound crazy, but I think in this modern age, religion is more important than ever! Kids these days hardly ever go to places of worship and pray, and it's horrendous in my humble opinion, @@nationname@@ should be a nation of good morals and family values" says local religious leader, @RANDOMNAME@. "Give out free pamphlets about the wonders of religion, tell people on the news of how their souls need to be saved, just do something! Religion needs to be encouraged as much as possible, but of course, don't be rude about it, bring them into religion with the power of love and kindness. Religion is great at that right?"
Some citizens are rejoicing, and some mourning the recent government endorsement of religion.
by The Finntopian Empire » Thu Aug 25, 2022 3:31 am
Daarwyrth wrote:Places of worships turnout is at an all-time low,
My suggestion would be to rephrase it as "The turnout at religious celebrations in places of worship is at an all-time low".and many older citizens lament over the current perceived lack of religiousness.
I think this could be fleshed out a little more. Why are they lamenting the perceived lack of religiousness? Are places of worship not making enough money to sustain them, so their buildings fall into disrepair? Do these older citizens perceive the lack of religiousness as a lack of morality? I think this could be fleshed out in the intro a little more. Additionally, what makes this an issue of the state? I think that can also be added into the description.Leftist speaker, @RANDOMNAME@ is the first to let their opinion become known, skipping into your office while looking depressed at the same time.
What exactly is this trying to convey? That the speaker in question pretends to be happy and joyful while being "dead" on the inside for a lack of religiosity? Perhaps you could pop this out more, to convey the meaning clearer.
Additionally, option 1 is a little bit lengthy. Try to see if you can bring the same point in a more succinct manner.@@leader@@ has announced it's time to "chill out" and "be cool" when it comes to religion.
I think this effect line could be a little sharper in terms of humour. Try to see if you can come up with a pun to throw in.Before you answer, he continues
This can be cut out, as it adds unnecessary length to the issue option.he stands there, waiting for your agreement with the plan, which he believes is irrefutable.
Same here. You don't need to explain an option's speaker is waiting for your answer or response.People peacefully practising their religion have been labelled as terrorists and locked up after the recent ban on religion
This effect line is too long and needs to be shortened. Also, it lacks humour. As with the other effect line, try to see if you can come up with a pun that fits/reflects the issue option.[option 3] "This may sound crazy, but I think in this modern age, religion is more important than ever! Kids these days hardly ever go to places of worship and pray, and it's horrendous in my humble opinion, @@nationname@@ should be a nation of good morals and family values" says local religious leader, @RANDOMNAME@. "Give out free pamphlets about the wonders of religion, tell people on the news of how their souls need to be saved, just do something! Religion needs to be encouraged as much as possible, but of course, don't be rude about it, bring them into religion with the power of love and kindness. Religion is great at that right?"
This option should be shortened as well, it's too long.Some citizens are rejoicing, and some mourning the recent government endorsement of religion.
Idem dito as with the other remarks about the effect lines: insert more humour.
The idea would be workable for an issue draft, but I think this particular draft needs a lot of work. Especially in terms of humour, it's almost entirely missing in the text as it stands. So, my general remarks are these: try to bring each issue option in a more succinct manner, and have each option speaker pop out somehow. Give them more character, make them more distinguishable from one another, as now each speaker sounds the same. And most importantly, humour! Pour it abundantly over the draft :)
by Australian rePublic » Thu Aug 25, 2022 6:59 am
by The Finntopian Empire » Thu Aug 25, 2022 8:20 am
Australian rePublic wrote:Unless you're in a theocracy, why would the government involve themselves in such matters? Would older people being upset about it really constitute a government response?
by Trivega » Thu Aug 25, 2022 8:34 am
Trivegal State Times
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by The Finntopian Empire » Thu Aug 25, 2022 8:40 am
Trivega wrote:Religion is a pretty commonly discussed issue, so I think the idea itself isn't flawed.
What this issue reminds me the most of is that one issue that occurs when you have high income equality in a capitalist nation- where the options either push your nation's equality down, or push for socialist policies. I feel like this issue could work similarly. Options 2, 3, and 4 all work pretty well in that regard- providing a push for state atheism, a minor push towards religion, and a major push towards religion respectively. However, option 1 feels a tad too neutral- since the nation will presumably already have high secularism when this issue is seen, the option basically becomes a "Do nothing" option, and the issue would probably be better without it.
Additionally, I agree with Australian rePublic in that the older people being upset feels a tad weak- maybe it could instead be a religious activist group, or possibly even a church like the violetists?
by Daarwyrth » Thu Aug 25, 2022 11:23 am
The Finntopian Empire wrote:Australian rePublic wrote:Unless you're in a theocracy, why would the government involve themselves in such matters? Would older people being upset about it really constitute a government response?
probably not, do I scrap the issue or would it be better to just change the subject of it?
by Trotterdam » Thu Aug 25, 2022 1:09 pm
by Daarwyrth » Thu Aug 25, 2022 1:46 pm
Trotterdam wrote:Perhaps some of the few remaining believers do some wacky publicity stunt in an attempt to convince more people to attend services, and you have to decide how you feel about that. (Acceptable expression of religious freedom? Dirty trick to shut down people's critical thinking? Irreverent bastardization of the religion's original values?)
by Australian rePublic » Thu Aug 25, 2022 4:20 pm
The Finntopian Empire wrote:Australian rePublic wrote:Unless you're in a theocracy, why would the government involve themselves in such matters? Would older people being upset about it really constitute a government response?
probably not, do I scrap the issue or would it be better to just change the subject of it?
by El Lazaro » Sat Aug 27, 2022 1:57 pm
Trotterdam wrote:Keep in mind, though, that stats depend on government choices, so it's relatively unlikely (though possible) for a NationStates nation to end up with low Religiousness without the player deliberately pushing for that. Hence players in that situation are far more likely to think "hey, mission successful" than "argh, how do I fix this".
So I think there needs to be a stronger argument for change than "some people are unhappy with the situation".
Perhaps some of the few remaining believers do some wacky publicity stunt in an attempt to convince more people to attend services, and you have to decide how you feel about that. (Acceptable expression of religious freedom? Dirty trick to shut down people's critical thinking? Irreverent bastardization of the religion's original values?)
by Thousand Branches » Sat Aug 27, 2022 6:07 pm
by The Finntopian Empire » Sun Aug 28, 2022 1:13 am
Thousand Branches wrote:I’m disappointed there’s no references to the hit song by R.E.M :p
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