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[Draft] @@nation@@'s unexpected acquisition

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Bovad
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Founded: Mar 16, 2022
Liberal Democratic Socialists

[Draft] @@nation@@'s unexpected acquisition

Postby Bovad » Mon Jun 20, 2022 1:56 pm

Last week, the @@demonym@@ flag was found on the beach of an unclaimed island inhabited by a primitve tribe, making @@nation@@ the new owner of a colony. A long procession of department heads and random people alike have filed into your office, each demanding a different solution.

Option 1
"It isn't like the island's doing us any good!" Says your economic accountant. "How about we just give them our modern technology and cut them loose! It benefits both sides... right?"
Result: Areas that don't meet strict economic quotas are left to fend for themselves.

Option 2
"How could you be so heartless!" Shouts your minister of foreign relations "That tiny island could never survive on its own economically! From now on evrey man, woman, and child on that island is a @@demonym@@! Maybe it will drag on our economy for a while, but we must help in any way we can!"
Result: @@nation@@ annexes smaller nations whenever they fall behind technologically.

Option 3
"They've carved out a life there! Who are we to disrupt that?" Says a politically active but uninformed citizen. "We should ban all ships from approaching the island. Then they can live their happy lives without disruption! Everybody wins!"
Result: All foreign aid has been cut to "not disrupt the local lifestyle".

Option 4
"This poses an opportunity for cheap labor. Bring them over to the mainland and we can 'hire' them, if you catch my drift" says your minister of native oppression. "I for one, have a short staffed farm"
Result: @@nation@@'s colonies are oddly quiet.
Enacts the slavery policy.

Option 5
"Just look at it" says a minister so classified that even you have never heard of him before "Isolated, so that nobody would ever see what we do there. All my boys need is your go to relocate the natives and we'll have the perfect spot for some more... tasteful operations."
Result: Regular ship passengers frequently have radiation poisoning for "unknown reasons".

Feel free to critique, this is my first try at an issue
Last edited by Bovad on Tue Jun 21, 2022 12:26 am, edited 5 times in total.
A type 16 civilization[/b], according to this index.

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RedBrickLand
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Founded: Oct 14, 2021
Conservative Democracy

Postby RedBrickLand » Mon Jun 20, 2022 11:45 pm

Bovad wrote: diffrent solution.

Should be "different".

Bovad wrote:Option 3
"They've carved out a life there! Who are we to disrupt that?" Says a politically active but uninformed citizen. "We should ban all ships from approaching the island. Then they can live their happy lives without disruption! Everybody wins!"
Result: All foreign aid has been cut to "not disrupt the local lifestyle".

You should also probably mention the fact that this tribe would be vulnerable to lots of diseases that they lack immunity to.

Bovad wrote:island is a [denonynym]!

should be "demonym".

Bovad wrote:Option 5
"Just look at it" says a minister so classified that even you have never heard of him before "Isolated, so that nobody would ever see what we do there. All my boys need it your go to relocate the natives and we'll have the perfect spot for some more... secret operations."

First, I'm confused with the "All my boys need it your go to relocate the natives" part. I think what you intend to say is that we should relocate the natives to secretly dump radioactive waste on their island. The "all my boys" part needs some grammatical restructuring. Also, maybe make the speaker a minister of a ministry related to radiation and the like. Also, probably invalid for nations with the No Nuclear Power and/or the No WMDs policies. Also, the "secret operations" part is kind of ambiguous, but that might just be me.

Bovad wrote:Option 4
"This poses an opportunity for cheap labor. Bring them over to the mainland and we can 'hire' them, if you catch my drift" says your minister of native oppression. "I for one, have a short staffed farm"

Maybe make a doppelganger version of this option for nations that already have the Slavery policy.
A common advanced technique is the "doppelganger option" where two versions of an option will be presented as either/or. For example, one version of an option might be presented for nations that are capitalist, and another version for nations that are non-capitalist.
In this case, it's nations that have already legalized slavery and nations that haven't.

Additionally, you should probably read this, it's a guide on how to write issues and some other advanced stuff, it also includes a guide to macros which is really helpful.
What's a macro? A macro is a tiny piece of code which changes, depending on who's viewing it. For example, take this macro: @@NAME@@. Whenever I, Candlewhisper Archive, look at an issue and look at that part of an issue which says @@NAME@@, I see Candlewhisper Archive.


Other than that, your issue is pretty good and I like the premise.
Also, I'm relatively new to issue writing as well so my suggestions may be somewhat flawed or incorrect, but I'll give you my honest feedback.
There are also other problems that I think I don't have enough experience to discuss, so more experienced players would be your best feedback.
Last edited by RedBrickLand on Mon Jun 20, 2022 11:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Bovad
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Posts: 62
Founded: Mar 16, 2022
Liberal Democratic Socialists

Postby Bovad » Tue Jun 21, 2022 12:28 am

RedBrickLand wrote:
Bovad wrote: diffrent solution.

Should be "different".

Bovad wrote:Option 3
"They've carved out a life there! Who are we to disrupt that?" Says a politically active but uninformed citizen. "We should ban all ships from approaching the island. Then they can live their happy lives without disruption! Everybody wins!"
Result: All foreign aid has been cut to "not disrupt the local lifestyle".

You should also probably mention the fact that this tribe would be vulnerable to lots of diseases that they lack immunity to.

Bovad wrote:island is a [denonynym]!

should be "demonym".

Bovad wrote:Option 5
"Just look at it" says a minister so classified that even you have never heard of him before "Isolated, so that nobody would ever see what we do there. All my boys need it your go to relocate the natives and we'll have the perfect spot for some more... secret operations."

First, I'm confused with the "All my boys need it your go to relocate the natives" part. I think what you intend to say is that we should relocate the natives to secretly dump radioactive waste on their island. The "all my boys" part needs some grammatical restructuring. Also, maybe make the speaker a minister of a ministry related to radiation and the like. Also, probably invalid for nations with the No Nuclear Power and/or the No WMDs policies. Also, the "secret operations" part is kind of ambiguous, but that might just be me.

Bovad wrote:Option 4
"This poses an opportunity for cheap labor. Bring them over to the mainland and we can 'hire' them, if you catch my drift" says your minister of native oppression. "I for one, have a short staffed farm"

Maybe make a doppelganger version of this option for nations that already have the Slavery policy.
A common advanced technique is the "doppelganger option" where two versions of an option will be presented as either/or. For example, one version of an option might be presented for nations that are capitalist, and another version for nations that are non-capitalist.
In this case, it's nations that have already legalized slavery and nations that haven't.

Additionally, you should probably read this, it's a guide on how to write issues and some other advanced stuff, it also includes a guide to macros which is really helpful.
What's a macro? A macro is a tiny piece of code which changes, depending on who's viewing it. For example, take this macro: @@NAME@@. Whenever I, Candlewhisper Archive, look at an issue and look at that part of an issue which says @@NAME@@, I see Candlewhisper Archive.


Other than that, your issue is pretty good and I like the premise.
Also, I'm relatively new to issue writing as well so my suggestions may be somewhat flawed or incorrect, but I'll give you my honest feedback.
There are also other problems that I think I don't have enough experience to discuss, so more experienced players would be your best feedback.

Edits made

As for the last option, it was intended to be generally ambiguous what was going on there. Did make the "all my boys" part clearer though.
Thanks!
Last edited by Bovad on Tue Jun 21, 2022 12:29 am, edited 1 time in total.
A type 16 civilization[/b], according to this index.

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Tinhampton
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Founded: Oct 05, 2016
Anarchy

Postby Tinhampton » Tue Jun 21, 2022 7:24 am

How do we know that the @@DEMONYM@@ flag wasn't planted on that island by a semi-influential tribe member who wanted to prank the International Community?
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Bovad
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Founded: Mar 16, 2022
Liberal Democratic Socialists

Postby Bovad » Tue Jun 21, 2022 8:16 am

Tinhampton wrote:How do we know that the @@DEMONYM@@ flag wasn't planted on that island by a semi-influential tribe member who wanted to prank the International Community?

Because they have never had contact with the outside world
A type 16 civilization[/b], according to this index.

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Australian rePublic
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Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Australian rePublic » Sun Jun 26, 2022 12:41 am

Who planted the flag there?
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Electrum
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Founded: Jan 20, 2013
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Electrum » Tue Jun 28, 2022 5:38 am

In today's age of GPS and satellites it's unlikely that there would be an unclaimed island and even more unlikely that there would be people on it. Planting a flag on some island does not equate to ownership, despite what people thought in the past.
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