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[DRAFT] Undercover Cop Arrested

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Candlewhisper Archive
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[DRAFT] Undercover Cop Arrested

Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Fri May 07, 2021 4:22 pm

Old story, but seems more topical these days with police racism increasingly in the news:

https://www.theguardian.com/media/2003/ ... bbc.uknews

An issue just asking "is police racism bad?" seemed too obvious and one dimensional to me, so I've left it entirely ambiguous in this issue as to whether NAME's police forces are actually racist. The movie references in this will likely be entirely missed by anyone under the age of 35, so I've made them pretty heavy handed. Couldn't resist it, really.

TITLE:
Undercover Cop Arrested

VALIDITY:
Police and free press exist
ADULT

DESCRIPTION:
Police and press are at loggerheads, after an undercover journalist joined the @@ANIMAL@@ City Police Academy, with the intent of uncovering and secretly filming evidence of institutional racism. The police have arrested the journalist, and want to see him prosecuted.

OPTION 1
"Deception was employed to obtain pecuniary advantage, and that's very, very, very bad," asserts Commandant George Lassard, who is speaking from behind a wooden podium, and keeps making odd facial expressions at you. "Many, many public funds were wasted training this very, very bad individual, and thanks to him a genuine recruit has lost their chance to join the force. This is unethical journalism at its very, very worst, and many, many charges need to be levelled here. Oh god, yes. YES."

OUTCOME:
journalists found to be in possession of Groucho glasses are arrested on espionage charges

OPTION 2
"Look, I had a credible private source telling me there was racism in the academy, and it was in the public interest to investigate," reports journo Steve Mahoney, emerging suddenly next to the Commandant from some unseen location. "That I didn't find any doesn't matter -- the free press has a duty to challenge authority, to speak truth to power and to employ subterfuge when we deem it in the public interest. The powers-that-be can't be allowed to arrest someone who is holding them to account! That's the path to totalitarianism!"

OUTCOME:
government aides are surprising attentive to their ministers' every word

OPTION 3
"You know, this whole undercover thing has potential, if we turn it around," murmurs obsequious police lieutenant G. W. Harris, leading you to one side. "You should be placing police infiltrators in media organisations, to report back to you on what they're up to. If they're being subversive, or if they're planning further hijinks like this Mahoney fellow did... well, you just give a little nod, and your problems will quietly disappear."

OUTCOME:
when @@LEADER@@ coughs everyone around backs away nervously
editors like linguistic ambiguity more than most people

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SherpDaWerp
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Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby SherpDaWerp » Sat May 08, 2021 5:06 pm

If I may, why the Adult validity? I can't really see any references of a particularly graphic or overtly sexual nature.
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Candlewhisper Archive
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Anarchy

Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Mon May 10, 2021 2:25 pm

Probably but not needed, but its because the issue heavily references the scene in Police Academy where the commandant is getting a blow job from under the lectern whilst giving a speech, and then the hooker creeps off, and then he looks down and sees cheeky prankster Mahoney down there, and...

Well, you had to be there. The 80s, I mean. But back in those halcyon days, this was the height of comedy.
editors like linguistic ambiguity more than most people

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SherpDaWerp
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Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby SherpDaWerp » Mon May 10, 2021 7:41 pm

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:the scene in Police Academy

Ah. Guess that's covered by "entirely missed by anyone under the age of 35". Now you've mentioned it - the only real part of the reference that stands out as overt is the Commandant's exclamations at the end of his speech, and even then it's probably not over PG-13. Up you you, I guess.

Just quickly, while I'm here:
asserts Commandant George Lassard, who is speaking from behind a wooden podium, and keeps making odd facial expressions at you.

Characterisation with two separate sentence fragments tends to be clunkier than combining them into one. I'd write this as
asserts Commandant George Lassard, who keeps making odd facial expressions at you from behind his wooden podium.
Last edited by SherpDaWerp on Thu May 13, 2021 12:32 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Baggieland
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Corporate Police State

Postby Baggieland » Thu May 13, 2021 12:09 am

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:Probably but not needed, but its because the issue heavily references the scene in Police Academy where the commandant is getting a blow job from under the lectern whilst giving a speech, and then the hooker creeps off, and then he looks down and sees cheeky prankster Mahoney down there, and

Hey Candle, I'm pretty sure it's only you and I who remember Police Academy from when it was released :) so probably no need for the adult validity, as it isn't obvious from within your issue as it's written.

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:government aides are surprising attentive to their ministers' every word

Surprisingly.

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Fauxia
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Left-Leaning College State

Postby Fauxia » Thu May 13, 2021 2:14 pm

Yeah, if you have to be an adult to get the adult reference in the first place, I would think it's probably fine.
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Laka Strolistandiler
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Postby Laka Strolistandiler » Fri May 14, 2021 3:47 am

You also should probably exclude this issue from nations with “No Adultery” policies because of option 1.
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Visionary Union
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Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Visionary Union » Fri May 14, 2021 3:53 am

Hey, I'm under the age of 35 and recognised the movie.. Thanks mom and dad.

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Candlewhisper Archive
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Anarchy

Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Fri May 14, 2021 7:28 am

Hehe, my 8 year old son wanted to know why none of his friends had heard of tmnt and thundercats, to which my reply was that their dads are probably more grown up than me, and don't have their own toy collections.
Last edited by Candlewhisper Archive on Fri May 14, 2021 7:28 am, edited 1 time in total.
editors like linguistic ambiguity more than most people

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Laka Strolistandiler
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Postby Laka Strolistandiler » Fri May 14, 2021 7:30 am

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:Hehe, my 8 year old son wanted to know why none of his friends had heard of tmnt and thundercats, to which my reply was that their dads are probably more grown up than me, and don't have their own toy collections.

Say so, I wish to on end day have a talk like this with my child as well... If I’ll ever have one. Although, I think I’ll talk to him about Venus Senki, LoGG, DYRL, etc.
For: Cultural Nationalism, Enlightened Dictatorship, Authoritarianism, Pro-Life, Computer-Controlled Command Economy, Collectivism, Machiavellism, National Communism,Zionism, Total Equality of Sexes, Stoicism, Altruism, Russian Imperialism, Internet Piracy, Nuclear Energy and Weapons

Mixed: Freedom of Speech, Animal Rights, Populism, Democracy, Total War, Environmentalism, Racism

Against: Neoliberalism, Privacy, Republicanism, Secularism, Capitalism, Abortion, LGBTQ+, Critical Racial Theory, Individualism, Internationalism, Sunni Islam, Zionism, Personal Privacy and Rights

IC Flag Iceberg meme cheers to PAS for the idea.
The most based half-black Russian you’re ever going to see in your whole life.
Pride? [REDACTED]


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