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My Life Matters! [Abandoned]

A place to spoil daily issues for those who haven't had them yet, snigger at typos, and discuss ideas for new ones.
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Indusse
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Posts: 421
Founded: Nov 21, 2016
Moralistic Democracy

My Life Matters! [Abandoned]

Postby Indusse » Mon Jul 06, 2020 11:10 pm

[Title] My life Matters

The Issue

Recently, in a large city of @@nation@@, Two men a @@Demonym@@ and a Bigtopian met with an accident. A passer-by who was a native of @@nation@@ went and rescued The @@demonym@@ without paying attention to the Bigtopian. The Bigtopian who wasn't given basic medical help died at the spot. Riots broke all over @@nation@@ and many people got injured.

The Debate

( Kindly note that the options are given as 1,2,3 and it's outcome as ¹,²,³)

1. @@randomname@@ , the passer-by says 'Why should I rescue a Bigtopian? He isn't from my nation nor he isn't useful to us. Why should I even pay attention to the foreigner? This native, who I rescued may layer be a great guy and succeed @@leadername@@.

¹. Excess duties,tax and rules are being imposed upon the Bigtopians.

2. @@randomname@@, the Bigtopian leader
shouts 'How dare you treat us like this? We are also humans! Do you think we are fools or something of that sort?. She demands more rights to the Bigtopians than the native people or they will cause political unrest and riots in the nation.

². A anti-bigtopian movement has risen among the natives leading to riots.

3. @@randomname@@, a civil-rights activist demands ' We need Equality!!! Everyone should be treated equally! Say no to discrimination! Say no exploitation!! Join together for a wonderful @@nation@@'.

³. Slogans like 'Unity in Diversity' are chanted throughout the nation.
Last edited by Indusse on Fri Jul 10, 2020 12:11 am, edited 2 times in total.
"WE LIVE TO SERVE"
¤ WA DELEGATE of India ( Twice)
INDUSSE : INDIA FOR LIFE
• AICB SEASON 2 CHAMPION
•AICB SEASON 1 RUNNERS UP
• AIFC SEASON 2 CHAMPION
SPORTING WORLD CUP 8 2nd RUNNERS UP
PRIME MINISTER (INDIA)

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Apabeossie
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Founded: Jun 04, 2018
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Apabeossie » Tue Jul 07, 2020 5:56 am

Rewrite of the description, although I'm not great and grammar either :P
Recently, in a large city in @@NAME@@, @@A@@ @@DEMONYM@@ and a Bigtopian were hit by (or any passive form) A passerby, who was a native @@DEMONYM@@, went and rescued @@demonym@@ without paying attention to the Bigtopian, who died at the spot without medical help. Riots have broken all over @@nation@@ and many people got injured.


Indusse wrote:[Title]1. @@randomname@@ , the passer-by says 'Why should I rescue a Bigtopian? He isn't from my nation nor he isn't useful to us. Why should I even pay attention to the foreigner? This native, who I rescued may layer be a great guy and succeed @@leadername@@.

¹. Excess duties,tax and rules are being imposed upon the Bigtopians.

The last sentence doesn't make sense, and you can see it. Also I would write the effect line to more like Bigtopians not getting basic service rather than the current one.

There's also major writing issues in the other options, and although the topic doesn't seem to bad, this needs major effort to have a chance of passing.
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Candensia
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Founded: Apr 20, 2017
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Candensia » Tue Jul 07, 2020 6:32 am

See #458.
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Australian rePublic
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Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Tue Jul 07, 2020 2:17 pm

I'm guessing Emglish is not your first language?
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Indusse
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Posts: 421
Founded: Nov 21, 2016
Moralistic Democracy

Postby Indusse » Tue Jul 07, 2020 7:36 pm

Australian rePublic wrote:I'm guessing Emglish is not your first language?

It is not.
"WE LIVE TO SERVE"
¤ WA DELEGATE of India ( Twice)
INDUSSE : INDIA FOR LIFE
• AICB SEASON 2 CHAMPION
•AICB SEASON 1 RUNNERS UP
• AIFC SEASON 2 CHAMPION
SPORTING WORLD CUP 8 2nd RUNNERS UP
PRIME MINISTER (INDIA)

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Indusse
Chargé d'Affaires
 
Posts: 421
Founded: Nov 21, 2016
Moralistic Democracy

Postby Indusse » Tue Jul 07, 2020 7:37 pm

Candensia wrote:See #458.


I didn't knew about this. Still can't we write another?

@candensia
Last edited by Indusse on Thu Jul 09, 2020 3:09 am, edited 1 time in total.
"WE LIVE TO SERVE"
¤ WA DELEGATE of India ( Twice)
INDUSSE : INDIA FOR LIFE
• AICB SEASON 2 CHAMPION
•AICB SEASON 1 RUNNERS UP
• AIFC SEASON 2 CHAMPION
SPORTING WORLD CUP 8 2nd RUNNERS UP
PRIME MINISTER (INDIA)

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Candensia
Diplomat
 
Posts: 714
Founded: Apr 20, 2017
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Candensia » Thu Jul 09, 2020 4:10 pm

Indusse wrote:
Candensia wrote:See #458.


I didn't knew about this. Still can't we write another?

@candensia


I think the overlap is too great. I'd advise against this particular topic.
The Free Joy State wrote:Time spent working on writing skills -- even if the draft doesn't work -- is never wasted.

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Jutsa
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Posts: 4965
Founded: Dec 06, 2015
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Jutsa » Thu Jul 09, 2020 7:39 pm

I admit I'm inclined to agree with Candensia here, although if it weren't for the overlap this actually would be an interesting premise. :)

For sure, if you'd like some help coming up with premise ideas for another issue to write, or just need to ask if a topic's been covered,
do feel free to ask around in the writers' block megathread on this forum, or view some of the other users' dispatches for issue ideas.

Welcome to Got Issues. Hope to see more from you. :)

edit: Oh, and in the event you decide to discard the draft, do place replace [DRAFT] with [DISCARDED] or [ABANDONED] or something along those lines.
Last edited by Jutsa on Thu Jul 09, 2020 7:40 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Indusse
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Posts: 421
Founded: Nov 21, 2016
Moralistic Democracy

Postby Indusse » Fri Jul 10, 2020 12:10 am

Ok. Then, if u guys say so. I will abandon it
"WE LIVE TO SERVE"
¤ WA DELEGATE of India ( Twice)
INDUSSE : INDIA FOR LIFE
• AICB SEASON 2 CHAMPION
•AICB SEASON 1 RUNNERS UP
• AIFC SEASON 2 CHAMPION
SPORTING WORLD CUP 8 2nd RUNNERS UP
PRIME MINISTER (INDIA)


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