Wack Science Industries [OPEN]

[Wack-i]

Wack Science has been perfecting multiple inventions and things to sell to the general public. This includes: Transdimensional Teleporter, Home Service Machine, McDonalds Ice Cream Machine that isn't broken, and much more!

The Transdimensional Teleporter is able to send you to other planes of existence in a split! You just have to know what you're doing, but you do? Right?
Price: $8000 USD

The Home Service Machine is a small machine (ideally placed as a computer tower under desk) that can serve you, be hooked up to an alarm system, and much more.
Price: $6000 USD

The alarm system can be hooked up from the home service machine or stand alone. When intruders detected, it will start displaying security cameras and shoot them with Existence Removers. You can set up allies and enemies when bought.
Price: $10000 USD

This is a gun that shoots newly found chemicals at the target that erases their cells and atoms.
Price: $5000 USD

Code: Select all

Order Application
Nation of consumer:
Item(s) being purchased:
Address and city:

Investments help us bring new products and services to you.

Code: Select all

Investment Form
Investor/Investors:
Nation of Investor(s):
Money being put into stock:

[Wack-i]

bump

[Ximea]

Doktor Wunderbar, the omnipotent alcoholic plague doktor of the Scientific Technocracy of Ximea, read the advertisement. He took a swig from his hip flask. His plague-doctor mask was designed upon his instructions to allow him to do this without taking it off. He continued reading.

"Okay. So," he announced to his assistant, Becchino, who had already read the document. "They're selling a teleporter and a bunch of home-security stuff we don't need."

"I would like to call attention to the so-called existence removers," Becchino said. "They claim to have a chemical that can erase cells and atoms."

Doktor Wunderbar rolled his eyes. The effects were hidden behind his mask. "Got a couple of options there. One is that they're using a powerful caustic or corrosive. I'm guessing a molecular acid. We can extract as much of that as we want from those xenomorphs we found on LV-426. That, incidentally, would remove cells but not atoms, which would mean that they are lying liars. The other possibility is that they are using antimatter. We can make as much of that as we want at the Desolate Sands High-Energy Test Site. And I'll point out that it doesn't just remove atoms; it explodes them with an energetic yield in joules commensurate with the mass of the annihilated matter in grams times the speed of light in meters per second, squared. Which would mean it turns any potential intruder into a bomb that kills planets."

Doktor Wunderbar took another swig of Scotch. "I like my planet."

"Duly noted, sir," Becchino said. "So then, why are we still talking about this?"

"Because that transdimensional teleporter interests me," Doktor Wunderbar said. "Find out how it works. If it won't destroy the universe, get a few."

TO: Larry von Oiuea Mooz Khan of Wack von Hoinikaji Pork Macaroni Hippo McLemon, President, The Federation of Wack-i
FROM: Doktor Wunderbar, Omnipotent Alcoholic Plague Doktor, Scientific Meritocracy of Ximea
SUBJ: Transdimensional Teleporters

MSG BEGINS:

How do your teleporters work? We have a few experimental teleporters of our own that operate on principles of quantum tunneling and novel interpretations of Bell's theorem with respect to the Many-Worlds interpretation of quantum mechanics, and other technobabble. If you have solved the issues with Heisenberg uncertainty that continue to bedevil us, we would be interested in purchasing your technology.

Also do your existence removers use molecular acid or antimatter We're not asking that.

MSG ENDS

[Wack-i]

Doktor Wunderbar, the omnipotent alcoholic plague doktor of the Scientific Technocracy of Ximea, read the advertisement. He took a swig from his hip flask. His plague-doctor mask was designed upon his instructions to allow him to do this without taking it off. He continued reading.

"Okay. So," he announced to his assistant, Becchino, who had already read the document. "They're selling a teleporter and a bunch of home-security stuff we don't need."

"I would like to call attention to the so-called existence removers," Becchino said. "They claim to have a chemical that can erase cells and atoms."

Doktor Wunderbar rolled his eyes. The effects were hidden behind his mask. "Got a couple of options there. One is that they're using a powerful caustic or corrosive. I'm guessing a molecular acid. We can extract as much of that as we want from those xenomorphs we found on LV-426. That, incidentally, would remove cells but not atoms, which would mean that they are lying liars. The other possibility is that they are using antimatter. We can make as much of that as we want at the Desolate Sands High-Energy Test Site. And I'll point out that it doesn't just remove atoms; it explodes them with an energetic yield in joules commensurate with the mass of the annihilated matter in grams times the speed of light in meters per second, squared. Which would mean it turns any potential intruder into a bomb that kills planets."

Doktor Wunderbar took another swig of Scotch. "I like my planet."

"Duly noted, sir," Becchino said. "So then, why are we still talking about this?"

"Because that transdimensional teleporter interests me," Doktor Wunderbar said. "Find out how it works. If it won't destroy the universe, get a few."

TO: Larry von Oiuea Mooz Khan of Wack von Hoinikaji Pork Macaroni Hippo McLemon, President, The Federation of Wack-i
FROM: Doktor Wunderbar, Omnipotent Alcoholic Plague Doktor, Scientific Meritocracy of Ximea
SUBJ: Transdimensional Teleporters

MSG BEGINS:

How do your teleporters work? We have a few experimental teleporters of our own that operate on principles of quantum tunneling and novel interpretations of Bell's theorem with respect to the Many-Worlds interpretation of quantum mechanics, and other technobabble. If you have solved the issues with Heisenberg uncertainty that continue to bedevil us, we would be interested in purchasing your technology.

Also do your existence removers use molecular acid or antimatter We're not asking that.

MSG ENDS

It works by scanning for nearby life in close proximity that is supposedly using it, then it scans asks you punch in some numbers. Then transports your molecules to the equivalent location in the other dimension.

[Wack-i]

overdue bump

[Hanshire]

Wack Science has been perfecting multiple inventions and things to sell to the general public. This includes: Transdimensional Teleporter, Home Service Machine, McDonalds Ice Cream Machine that isn't broken, and much more!

The Transdimensional Teleporter is able to send you to other planes of existence in a split! You just have to know what you're doing, but you do? Right?
Price: $8000 USD

The Home Service Machine is a small machine (ideally placed as a computer tower under desk) that can serve you, be hooked up to an alarm system, and much more.
Price: $6000 USD

The alarm system can be hooked up from the home service machine or stand alone. When intruders detected, it will start displaying security cameras and shoot them with Existence Removers. You can set up allies and enemies when bought.
Price: $10000 USD

This is a gun that shoots newly found chemicals at the target that erases their cells and atoms.
Price: $5000 USD

Code: Select all

Order Application
Nation of consumer:
Item(s) being purchased:
Address and city:

Investments help us bring new products and services to you.

Code: Select all

Investment Form
Investor/Investors:
Nation of Investor(s):
Money being put into stock:

Order Application
Nation of consumer: The Holy Empire ofHanshire
Item(s) being purchased: 500 Existence Removers
Address and city: Military Base TK-421

Investment Form
Investor/Investors: The Holy Empire ofHanshire
Nation of Investor(s): The Holy Empire ofHanshire
Money being put into stock: 10,000,00 NSD
Equity Requested in Exchange for Investment (FLEXIBLE): 10% with 25% royalty per unit sold

[Wack-i]

Wack Science has been perfecting multiple inventions and things to sell to the general public. This includes: Transdimensional Teleporter, Home Service Machine, McDonalds Ice Cream Machine that isn't broken, and much more!

The Transdimensional Teleporter is able to send you to other planes of existence in a split! You just have to know what you're doing, but you do? Right?
Price: $8000 USD

The Home Service Machine is a small machine (ideally placed as a computer tower under desk) that can serve you, be hooked up to an alarm system, and much more.
Price: $6000 USD

The alarm system can be hooked up from the home service machine or stand alone. When intruders detected, it will start displaying security cameras and shoot them with Existence Removers. You can set up allies and enemies when bought.
Price: $10000 USD

This is a gun that shoots newly found chemicals at the target that erases their cells and atoms.
Price: $5000 USD

Code: Select all

Order Application
Nation of consumer:
Item(s) being purchased:
Address and city:

Investments help us bring new products and services to you.

Code: Select all

Investment Form
Investor/Investors:
Nation of Investor(s):
Money being put into stock:

Order Application
Nation of consumer: The Holy Empire ofHanshire
Item(s) being purchased: 500 Existence Removers
Address and city: Military Base TK-421

Investment Form
Investor/Investors: The Holy Empire ofHanshire
Nation of Investor(s): The Holy Empire ofHanshire
Money being put into stock: 10,000,00 NSD
Equity Requested in Exchange for Investment (FLEXIBLE): 10% with 25% royalty per unit sold

Accepted and sold.