[desc]Today is the official date of the United Federation's independence, and United Federals all over the world are celebrating. The partygoers in @@NAME@@ have proven to be particularly rowdy, with the celebrations culminating in a firefight that resulted in the injury of several citizens, law enforcement officials and a goat.
[validity] has guns, law enforcement, and dual citizenship, capitalist
[option] "Look, I'm all for letting people celebrate, but we've got to draw the line somewhere!" rants wounded officer @@RANDOMNAME@@ as @@HE@@ shakily clutches a donut. "We need to keep @@NAME@@ a civil place — if people want to act like hooligans, they can head on over to Maxtopia. Mandate that partygoers keep their hands off of firearms and explosives, and maintain their noise level beneath a reasonable threshold. You have no idea how many nights I've woken up to the sound of teenagers rapping..."
[effect] @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ parties are so quiet you can hardly hear the beat drop
[option] "Ey', @@LEADER@@! What's this 'bout puttin' a cap on our celebrations?" hollers United Federal citizen @@RANDOMNAME@@ as @@HE@@ busts down your door with a baseball bat. "Why, back home in the Federation we had enclosed areas, extra spacious and the like, where ever' body could join in on the festivities! How 'bout this — we can start up a party planning committee or sumn' that ensures events and festivals are properly planned and orderly, while keeping their distinct style! That way we can still do the Twin-Barreled Shotgun challenge, but keep them party poopers out of it! Wipe that expression off yer' face, its perfectly safe."
[effect] what happens in the party zone stays in the party zone
[option] "What?! These damned foreigners shouldn't be able to bring their lousy customs into our glorious @@TYPE@@!" seethes your hyper-nationalistic Minister of Homeland Security, who is known to eject immigrants across the border for 'terrorism and the like'. "C'mon @@LEADER@@, if anything, these horrid practices need to come to an end — we mustn't allow @@NAME@@ to devolve into a cesspool of chaos. Plus, I need an excuse to properly punish anyone who dares sing those repugnant foreign tunes in my coal mine..."
[effect] Dàguó immigrants celebrating the New Year are arrested for arson