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[DRAFT] Clean Flavours

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Candlewhisper Archive
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[DRAFT] Clean Flavours

Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Wed Mar 25, 2020 2:28 am

Put this together yesterday evening...

Based on the 2006 Fabuloso incident, when hundreds of people were poisoned by a newly-introduced cleaning fluid that had packaging that resembled a soft drink.

TITLE:
Clean Flavours

VALIDITY:
Nations without super-strict packaging standards, capitalist.

DESCRIPTION:
Over the weekend two dozen people were admitted to hospital with poisoning from accidental ingestion of the detergent liquid Wonderoso, having mistaken it for a soft drink.

OPTION 1
"It's irresponsible to package detergent in the same way as soft drinks," observes Dr. @@randomname@@, a toxicologist. "It's not just the liquids either. There's brightly coloured detergent tablets that kids mistake for sweets, and manufacturers apply odours like cinnamon, mint and vanilla to toxic products. Cleaning products should be hard to open, should look unappetising and should be clearly toxic in appearance!" @@HE@@ pauses to take a swig from @@HIS@@ soft drink, and suddenly stiffens and keels over like a falling log.

OUTCOME:
washing-up liquid looks and smells like baby poo

OPTION 2
"Our prime responsibility is to our shareholders, and that means maximising sales, and that means attractive packaging," explains a corporate marketing spokesperson, who is dressed in a lab coat to give the impression of being a scientist. "Its not our duty or your duty to protect people from their own stupidity, and you should be explicitly endorsing that position. Look on it this way -- we're raising the national IQ through natural selection. Yeah, you're welcome."

OUTCOME:
restaurants have noticed that hanging wet laundry from the ceiling makes diners order more food


OPTION 3
"The problem is not that detergents look like foods, it's that food looks like detergents," complains organic farmer @@randomname@@, waving a misshapen turnip at you. "We should ban food colourings and any food additives that are designed to change the visual appearance of edibles. Once people get used to natural-looking produce, there'll be no chance of them mistaking a pastel-coloured soap product for food."

OUTCOME:
orange juice has been renamed yellow juice
Last edited by Candlewhisper Archive on Fri Mar 27, 2020 5:28 am, edited 8 times in total.
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SherpDaWerp
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Postby SherpDaWerp » Wed Mar 25, 2020 6:36 pm

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:Nations without super-strict packaging standards
No idea how this is tracked, but I assume whatever stat this is based off can also affect safety? Regardless, might it be worth putting another validity for "nations without super-intelligent populace", for which the people are smart enough to not drink detergent?

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:Over the weekend two dozen people were admitted to hospital with poisoning from accidental ingestion of the detergent liquid Wonderoso, having mistaken it for a soft drink.
I know you're a fan of the brief opening description, but it would be worth mentioning that this product is "newly introduced". Otherwise, why have 24 people only just died last weekend, assuming this product has been out for a while?


Additionally, one of the speakers (idk which) could and probably should mention product location within a supermarket. At my local shops, there's a dedicated row for "cleaning products" and if you go in there expecting soft drink there's more issues than just the packaging. Maybe the corporate dude can shift the blame onto supermarkets for having long layouts (designed to maximise the time consumers spend in-store) that push people past detergents, or maybe there could be a plot twist in that a re-stocker mistook the detergent for a drink and put it in the drinks aisle, which increased confusion and led to deaths. Then another option could be added blaming supermarkets for poor product inventory management, or something.
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Australian rePublic
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Postby Australian rePublic » Wed Mar 25, 2020 11:26 pm

Wouldn't they have child-proof, to even prevent it by opening by accident? This would be pyrely for children, because even my illleterate grandmother was capable of distinguishing food from detergent before she got dementia. A child lock should do the trick. Also, arrest the idiot parents who put it wothin reach of kids.
Last edited by Australian rePublic on Wed Mar 25, 2020 11:29 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Chan Island
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Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Chan Island » Thu Mar 26, 2020 1:10 am

Has to be put here. :p

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFKQ7GflRkk


Otherwise it's looking good. Have you considered going for a kind of ''edible soap'' option (which is a thing- https://averyfoodlydiary.wordpress.com/2011/02/21/edible-soap/ ), so that it doesn't matter if people are eating the detergent because it's safe for consumption anyway?
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Candlewhisper Archive
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Founded: Aug 28, 2015
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Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Fri Mar 27, 2020 5:25 am

SherpDaWerp wrote:No idea how this is tracked, but I assume whatever stat this is based off can also affect safety? Regardless, might it be worth putting another validity for "nations without super-intelligent populace", for which the people are smart enough to not drink detergent?


Don't worrt too much about that -- obviously I'm not going to suggest a validity check that I don't know how to implement. :)

I know you're a fan of the brief opening description, but it would be worth mentioning that this product is "newly introduced". Otherwise, why have 24 people only just died last weekend, assuming this product has been out for a while?


That's a good call. I'll add that to the first draft.

Additionally, one of the speakers (idk which) could and probably should mention product location within a supermarket. At my local shops, there's a dedicated row for "cleaning products" and if you go in there expecting soft drink there's more issues than just the packaging. Maybe the corporate dude can shift the blame onto supermarkets for having long layouts (designed to maximise the time consumers spend in-store) that push people past detergents, or maybe there could be a plot twist in that a re-stocker mistook the detergent for a drink and put it in the drinks aisle, which increased confusion and led to deaths. Then another option could be added blaming supermarkets for poor product inventory management, or something.


I dunno. I think in the real life case the people had taken these products home, put them in the cupboard, then teenagers in the home had fished them out and drank from them. We could shift blame onto parents not putting things away properly, I guess, but if you've ever had teenagers in the house you'll know that their scavenging knows no limits. Plus, I do like three option issues where possible, and to me adding these other options would be more for their own sake rather than because the story demands them.
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Candlewhisper Archive
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Founded: Aug 28, 2015
Capitalizt

Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Fri Mar 27, 2020 5:28 am

Australian rePublic wrote:Wouldn't they have child-proof, to even prevent it by opening by accident? This would be pyrely for children, because even my illleterate grandmother was capable of distinguishing food from detergent before she got dementia. A child lock should do the trick. Also, arrest the idiot parents who put it wothin reach of kids.


I think in the real life case the victims were teenagers, so they wouldn't be stopped by a childproof cap. Also, of course, children of the age that can be deterred by caps are also of the age where they're more likely to ask for permission before drinking a soft drink.

Regardless, I think "safer packaging" in option 1 incorporates child safety caps. I'll add the words "hard to open" though, to address this more.
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Candlewhisper Archive
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Founded: Aug 28, 2015
Capitalizt

Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Fri Mar 27, 2020 5:30 am

Chan Island wrote:Has to be put here. :p

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFKQ7GflRkk


Otherwise it's looking good. Have you considered going for a kind of ''edible soap'' option (which is a thing- https://averyfoodlydiary.wordpress.com/2011/02/21/edible-soap/ ), so that it doesn't matter if people are eating the detergent because it's safe for consumption anyway?


Huh, that is kind of cool. I'm not sure I want a fourth option, but if I was going to, that'd be it.
editors like linguistic ambiguity more than most people


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