[SUBMITTED] Run, not Hide

[Outer Sparta]

You'll definitely see this issue be added. It's very solid and you put in a lot of great work.

[Apabeossie]

You'll definitely see this issue be added. It's very solid and you put in a lot of great work.

Others did a lot of the work though.

Is this ready for submission?

[Outer Sparta]

You'll definitely see this issue be added. It's very solid and you put in a lot of great work.

Others did a lot of the work though.

Is this ready for submission?

Definitely. If this issue doesn't get added I will quit NS

But anyways I wish you luck!

[Aurhany]

Others did a lot of the work though.

Is this ready for submission?

Definitely. If this issue doesn't get added I will quit NS

But anyways I wish you luck!

Thanks Sparta! (noticed I was in a different account )

Anyone in for final feedback before this issue gets submitted?

[Authoritaria-Imperia]

I'll just add some small things:

Option 2: "Wait, the parents left children ALONE at home?" cries @@RANDOMNAME@@, with @@HIS@@ tired and uninterested children behind @@HIM@@ on a leash. "If these kids weren’t left at home alone, this situation would never have happened! You should mandate that children have at least one adult protector with them 24/7 who can get them out in an emergency. It's the only way to keep them safe."

This feels a bit redundant, since they're the same words the speaker just used. What about "unguarded like that" or something similar?
The "children on a leash" thing still feels like too much to me, though that's a concern I've already raised — for me, it almost brings to mind an abusive situation.

Option 3: "Hallo @@LEADER@@, I've heard zat you're having izzues with fire..." says scientist @@RANDOMNAME@@, holding a large drone labelled (fire)fighter. "All zis could be easier with firefighting drones zat can carry powder to put off fire, and ja, even find children using cameras. ve von't need to risk losing lives vith drones. Throw some funding to drone development. This new technology vill save lives."

Just a missing capital letter. Also, I'll a little confused by the "(fire)fighter" thing; if it's a joke, it doesn't quite land for me — I feel like just "firefighter" would work better.

Kudos for sticking with this draft, by the way; I hope it gets added.

[Apabeossie]

I'll just add some small things:

Option 2: "Wait, the parents left children ALONE at home?" cries @@RANDOMNAME@@, with @@HIS@@ tired and uninterested children behind @@HIM@@ on a leash. "If these kids weren’t left at home alone, this situation would never have happened! You should mandate that children have at least one adult protector with them 24/7 who can get them out in an emergency. It's the only way to keep them safe."

This feels a bit redundant, since they're the same words the speaker just used. What about "unguarded like that" or something similar?

Unwatched... Would that also be a good word? ;P

The "children on a leash" thing still feels like too much to me, though that's a concern I've already raised — for me, it almost brings to mind an abusive situation.

The leashes demonstrate the "overcaring parent" here(to the point some might call abusive), and I'm just hoping it's not around the neck!

Option 3: "Hallo @@LEADER@@, I've heard zat you're having izzues with fire..." says scientist @@RANDOMNAME@@, holding a large drone labelled (fire)fighter. "All zis could be easier with firefighting drones zat can carry powder to put off fire, and ja, even find children using cameras. ve von't need to risk losing lives vith drones. Throw some funding to drone development. This new technology vill save lives."

Just a missing capital letter. Also, I'll a little confused by the "(fire)fighter" thing; if it's a joke, it doesn't quite land for me — I feel like just "firefighter" would work better.

Kudos for sticking with this draft, by the way; I hope it gets added.

That was a bit of humour there; (fire)fighter indicates a 'fighter drone' relabelled. Is there a better way to demonstrate that? Or can we remove it?

Anyway Thanks Auth-Imp!

[Nooooooooooooooo]

Just mandate that all, yes, all objects be fire-resistant.

I'd personally drop the "yes" part.

[Apabeossie]

Just mandate that all, yes, all objects be fire-resistant.

I'd personally drop the "yes" part.

That was for emphasizing the 'all' part, how would 'all, yes all' do? or any alternatives.

[Nooooooooooooooo]

I'd personally drop the "yes" part.

That was for emphasizing the 'all' part, how would 'all, yes all' do? or any alternatives.

I just feel like dropping the "yes" would make the idea crazier, the way fourth options usually are.

[Cretox State]

I can't think of any outstanding changes that need to be made, and this is overall a really solid issue!

[Outer Sparta]

I can't think of any outstanding changes that need to be made, and this is overall a really solid issue!

Which is why I said I would quit NS if this issue doesn't get accepted.

[Nooooooooooooooo]

I can't think of any outstanding changes that need to be made, and this is overall a really solid issue!

Which is why I said I would quit NS if this issue doesn't get accepted.

...And we just can't lose the mans himself, Outer Sparta!

[Cretox State]

I can't think of any outstanding changes that need to be made, and this is overall a really solid issue!

Which is why I said I would quit NS if this issue doesn't get accepted.

I know!

[Apabeossie]

This is nearing submission! I just want to say thank you for everyone who helped me in this draft. This wouldn't have been possible without your feedback.

I already asked in the GI discord, but in case this needs to be fixed:

says scientist @@RANDOMNAME@@, holding a large drone labelled (fire)fighter.

Some people were confused by this part. Here (fire)fighter indicates a 'fighter drone' relabelled, which may or may not make immediate sense. Is there a better way to express that?

[Nooooooooooooooo]

This is nearing submission! I just want to say thank you for everyone who helped me in this draft. This wouldn't have been possible without your feedback.

I already asked in the GI discord, but in case this needs to be fixed:

says scientist @@RANDOMNAME@@, holding a large drone labelled (fire)fighter.

Some people were confused by this part. Here (fire)fighter indicates a 'fighter drone' relabelled, which may or may not make immediate sense. Is there a better way to express that?

Maybe italicize "fire", or use some other formatting?

[Apabeossie]

This is nearing submission! I just want to say thank you for everyone who helped me in this draft. This wouldn't have been possible without your feedback.

I already asked in the GI discord, but in case this needs to be fixed:



Some people were confused by this part. Here (fire)fighter indicates a 'fighter drone' relabelled, which may or may not make immediate sense. Is there a better way to express that?

Maybe italicize "fire", or use some other formatting?

Yeah, I was thinking of that. Will I also need parentheses?

[Nooooooooooooooo]

Maybe italicize "fire", or use some other formatting?

Yeah, I was thinkong of that. Will I also need parentheses?

Possibly.

[Apabeossie]

After we fix the confusion in option 3, this will be submitted.

• (fire)fighter -Noooooooooooo
• a drone labelled 'fighter' with 'fire' hastily added to the beginning -trimmed down, originally by New Ciencia
• a fighter drone hastily relabelled 'firefighter'
• a fighter drone hastily converted for firefighting -Sherp
• a drone covered in fire-themed doodles - Auth-Imp
• a red-colored drone with a helmet on top
• esperately trying to extinguish a burning drone. - Cretox

[Apabeossie]

i have to be so indecisive on this one, better get the best joke before passing it into submission.

[Nooooooooooooooo]

X-(FIRE)Fighter

[Apabeossie]

or I should just choose one myself as the suggested jokes are quite good, and I'm tired of myself being like this.

[Outer Sparta]

or I should just choose one myself as the suggested jokes are quite good, and I'm tired of myself being like this.

Maybe just submit right now? It'll be an issue anyway and the editors will probably insert a few jokes.

[Apabeossie]

or I should just choose one myself as the suggested jokes are quite good, and I'm tired of myself being like this.

Maybe just submit right now? It'll be an issue anyway and the editors will probably insert a few jokes.

That is indeed a better option. (was thinking of that ) Submitting before Halloween when I'm ready.

[Apabeossie]

Submitting within a day.

[Apabeossie]

So, this is submitted after 9 months, only around 1~2 months of which was actually spent actively discussing.

Thank you for all feedbacks that made the final draft possible! I'm grateful for everyone who made the issue better -- and surprised how little of my writing was good enough to make it.

special thanks to:
Verdant
CWA
Authoritaria-Imperia

and everyone else

I took too time to make an easy decision -- so I guess I'll learn from that.