How Can I Improve my Lore and Introductory Factbook?

[Rovikstead]

Introduction to the Rovics FB: https://www.nationstates.net/nation=rov ... id=1285621

Hey guys. I'm currently writing the lore behind my nation residing in Caer Sidi. I wanted some feedback on both the content and the look of the factbook. I'm worried that the lore is unrealistic or uncompelling and that I may have to scrap it, but if that is the case, I would like to know now rather than never. Any feedback is greatly appreciated and please don't hold back on any hard criticism. Thank you to everyone who gives reads and gives feedback

[Evil Dictators Happyland]

If I were you, I'd move the first two paragraphs to the 'History' section and rewrite both those paragraphs and the section as a whole to be more like a historical account than an introduction to a fantasy novel. That said, you're working with a setting that has very prominent magic, so I wouldn't worry too much about things being unrealistic or 'not scientific enough'. Don't chalk everything up to 'a wizard did it', plotholes are still plotholes after all, but don't make realism your primary concern.

All told, your factbook is actually pretty good, probably better than most of mine and definitely better than most of the ones I've seen. I can tell that it could use some improvement, but offering specific advice on how to rewrite your factbook is beyond my writing skill.

[Rovikstead]

If I were you, I'd move the first two paragraphs to the 'History' section and rewrite both those paragraphs and the section as a whole to be more like a historical account than an introduction to a fantasy novel. That said, you're working with a setting that has very prominent magic, so I wouldn't worry too much about things being unrealistic or 'not scientific enough'. Don't chalk everything up to 'a wizard did it', plotholes are still plotholes after all, but don't make realism your primary concern.

All told, your factbook is actually pretty good, probably better than most of mine and definitely better than most of the ones I've seen. I can tell that it could use some improvement, but offering specific advice on how to rewrite your factbook is beyond my writing skill.

Thank you so much for the feedback! I really appreciate it.