[draft]Home of the Holy

[USS Monitor]

This is not the most focused thing I've ever written, but here it is anyway. I sometimes get issue ideas from songs that are stuck in my head, and this time it was a song about the Vatican's Swiss guards. I think the title and some of the effect lines (especially the 3rd one) have room for improvement.

The Home of the Holy

[desc]@@FAITH@@'s most sacred holy site in @@NAME@@ was ransacked and several irreplaceable relics were destroyed after a dispute over a bottle of soy sauce at a local restaurant escalated badly.

valid for nations that are at least moderately religious

[option]"This is a disgrace!" wails @@RANDOMNAME@@, the caretaker of the damaged reliquary. "Our people should be ashamed of themselves putting their petty Earthly squabbles before their faith in @@FAITH@@! You can make more soy sauce, but you can't replace our sacred relics! You have to help us beef up security! Station police officers to patrol the grounds, install security cameras, and rebuild the reliquary with heavy-duty steel doors."
[effect]the nation's holy places are littered with doughnut crumbs

[option]"How is this the government's responsibility?" asks secularist author @@RANDOMNAME@@. "Ask your followers for tithes and let the rest of us have a tax break!"
[effect]religious institutions are doing less charity work since funds were diverted to security at popular churches

[option]"The damage would have been a lot worse if a Merovingian tour group hadn't tackled the most violent rioters and tied them up with prayer beads," a priest who witnessed the violence tells you. "You should honor their brave deed by inviting Merovingian followers of @@FAITH@@ to guard the sacred grounds."
[effect]tourists and religious pilgrims like to pose for pictures with Merovingian guards

[option]"None of this would have happened if that stupid restaurant had put soy sauce on every table!" says @@RANDOMNAME@@, one of the restaurant patrons involved in the original dispute that sparked the conflict. "Let the priests sue them out of business and they can pay for the damage!"
[effect]restaurant patrons threaten to sue if the salt shaker at their table is empty

[option]"Religion is overrated anyway," said Soy-Joy Sauce Co. CEO @@RANDOMNAME@@. "I think it's clear that people would rather have more of our delicious soy sauce instead of some dumb 'holy place.' Why don't you just let us tear it down and build a new factory?"
[effect]soy sauce is considered decadent and heathenish

[Artsotska]

I'd say this is good so far. Good humour.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Wow, you're churning out the drafts right now, eh?

This is a great issue. Doesn't it feel a bit similar to 1271, though?

While this issue starts with soy sauce rather than a fallen candle, it still seems like a riff on the Notre Dame disaster, and basically asking the government to contribute to cathedral repairs.

What do you think?

[USS Monitor]

It was meant to focus more on security rather than repairs.

The original inspiration is not related to the Notre Dame fire at all. I was listening to a lot of Sabaton and I got "The Last Stand," which is about the Vatican's guards, stuck in my head.

[Australian rePublic]

Place of worship, not church. The place of worship could be a mosque, or temple, or synagogue

[USS Monitor]

Place of worship, not church. The place of worship could be a mosque, or temple, or synagogue

"Place of worship" doesn't flow right. Too long and formal.

Maybe "priests" or something? So it is still only one word.

[USS Monitor]

Place of worship, not church. The place of worship could be a mosque, or temple, or synagogue

"Place of worship" doesn't flow right. Too long and formal.

Maybe "priests" or something? So it is still only one word.

Made this change. Bumping for additional feedback.

[USS Monitor]

Bump.

I never submitted this cos I wasn't entirely happy with it, but I wasn't really getting feedback either. Now that the forum has picked up again, does anyone have any suggestions?

[Socio Polor]

Before I go deep into this can I ask something?

[desc]@@FAITH@@'s most sacred holy site in @@NAME@@ was ransacked and several irreplaceable relics were destroyed after a dispute over a bottle of soy sauce at a local restaurant escalated badly.

How exactly does an argument over soy sauce lead to the destruction of several sacred relics? Funny yes, but silly and a little unrealistic imo. Maybe I'm thinking too much into it?

[USS Monitor]

Before I go deep into this can I ask something?

[desc]@@FAITH@@'s most sacred holy site in @@NAME@@ was ransacked and several irreplaceable relics were destroyed after a dispute over a bottle of soy sauce at a local restaurant escalated badly.

How exactly does an argument over soy sauce lead to the destruction of several sacred relics? Funny yes, but silly and a little unrealistic imo. Maybe I'm thinking too much into it?

Somebody throws a punch, then people are mad at that guy cos he punched someone, it escalates from there, etc.

[Lelscrep]

This is a hard one to give feedback on, it reads really well! I couldn't think of any effect line changes, however, I think options two and five might be clashing a bit much. As in, I think the same person who would pick two would also pick five, because a secular person usually isn't a religious preservationist. They both end up being the anti-religious, pro economy options. Just a thought.

[Socio Polor]

Before I go deep into this can I ask something?

How exactly does an argument over soy sauce lead to the destruction of several sacred relics? Funny yes, but silly and a little unrealistic imo. Maybe I'm thinking too much into it?

Somebody throws a punch, then people are mad at that guy cos he punched someone, it escalates from there, etc.

Ehh, I don't know Monitor, maybe go into detail of the fight and the positioning of the relics which led them to be destroyed. Despite the intruinging premise, the dillema itself seems very vague and improbable to me. Though that's just my opinion as I see other people are fine with it. In any case, feel free to ignore this.

[USS Monitor]

Somebody throws a punch, then people are mad at that guy cos he punched someone, it escalates from there, etc.

Ehh, I don't know Monitor, maybe go into detail of the fight and the positioning of the relics which led them to be destroyed. Despite the intruinging premise, the dillema itself seems very vague and improbable to me. Though that's just my opinion as I see other people are fine with it. In any case, feel free to ignore this.

The series of events would be too long to describe without making the issue cluttered. There must have been a few intermediate steps between arguing about soy sauce and destroying the neighborhood.

This is a hard one to give feedback on, it reads really well! I couldn't think of any effect line changes, however, I think options two and five might be clashing a bit much. As in, I think the same person who would pick two would also pick five, because a secular person usually isn't a religious preservationist. They both end up being the anti-religious, pro economy options. Just a thought.

IRL, I might support option 2, but I would never support option 5. Option 2 is separation of church and state, while 5 is actively hostile toward religion. But after rereading this for the first time in months, I've realized that I really took "If you have a lot of options, they should be short" to the extreme.