ISSUE IDEA: Holy Spit (Not Safe Whilst Eating)

[Australian rePublic]

Oh no! Not an other Greek culture based issue...


Oh no! Not an other Greek culture based issue...
I was wondering if I should add some Greek expressions to the first speaker's speech
title] Holy Spit!

[desc] An old woman was arrested for spitting at one of you. On interrogation, she claims she was warding off the "evil eye", as she was worried that you were cursed by someone in the audience
[validity] must allow freedom of religion

[option] "@@LEADER@@, you're a very good looking @@MAN@@," suggests @@RANDOMFEMALENAME_1@@, the woman in question, "I was worried that someone would curse you with the evil eye! It's really dangerous!”
[effect] protestors who throw feces at @@LEADER@@ are exempt from punishment by claiming they were wishing @@HIM@@ luck

[option] "This is an unhygenic tradition!" panics @@RANDOMNAME@@, your minister of hygine dressed in a biohazard suite, whilst disinfecting your entire office. "I know that superstitious people spit on eachother, but that's how diseases spre... eh..." @@HE@@ panics and flees in terror at the sight of discarded sock.
[effect] talking with your mouth full is a criminal offense

[option] "This woman was an immigrant right? I told that these pigs are disgusting!" complains far right activist @@RANDOMNAME@@, sticking @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ flags all over your furniture. "They different skin colour to us, which automatically means they're filthy!”
[effect] anyone with a slight tan is deported

[title] Holy Spit!

[desc] 83 year old Ellenic immigrant, @@RANDOMFEMALENAME_1@@, was fast asleep when police raided her house at 3 in the morning and dragged her out of bed. Her alleged crime, spitting on you during a press conference. After 40 minutes of interrogation, she stuck to her story of warding off the evil eye, causing the police to bring her to your office.

[validity] must allow migration, must allow freedom of religion

[option] "@@LEADER@@, you're a very good looking @@MAN@@," suggests @@RANDOMFEMALENAME_1@@, the woman in question, whilst offering you a snack of rice wrapped in vine leaves, "I was worried that someone would curse you with the evil eye! It's really dangerous! My hairdresser's husband's sister was a very rich woman, until someone with the evil eye visited her. Then she went bankrupt and became homeless! I was just trying to protect you!"
[effect] protestors who throw feces at @@LEADER@@ are exempt from punishment by claiming they were wishing @@HIM@@ luck

[option] "This is an unhygenic tradition!" panics @@RANDOMNAME@@, your minister of hygine dressed in a biohazard suite, whilst disinfecting your entire office. "I know that people spit on eachother in the Ellenic culture, but that's how diseases spre... eh..." @@HE@@ panics and flees in terror at the sight of discarded sock.
[effect] talking with your mouth full is a criminal offense

[option] "I told that these pigs are disgusting!" complains far right activist @@RANDOMNAME@@, sticking @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ flags all over your furniture. "These Ellesians have a slightly different skin colour to us, which automatically means they're filthy! In fact, last week, I accidently walked passed a Dagouri restaurant and it stunk like curry, or whatever crap those Whink Wonks eat! Deport the lot of them!"
[effect] anyone with a slight tan is deported

[title] Holy Spit!

[desc] @@RANDOMFEMALENAME_1@@, an elderly migrant, spat on you yesterday. When interrogated by police, she claimed she was waring off the evil eye. Before pressing charges, she seemed innocent enough for police to allow her to plea her case to you.

[validity] must allow migration, must allow freedom of religion

[option] "I was just trying to get rid of evil eye!" cries @@RANDOMFEMALENAME_1@@, the woman in question, adding her saliva to all your furniture, "I try to give you good luck! Everyone does it in Ellena! Sorry if I upset you! I cook for you come over to my house, I make you avgolemono, and dolmathes, and spanakopita, and..."
[effect] people who through poo at @@LEADER@@ are exempt from punishment by claiming that they were wishing @@HIM@@ luck

[option] "That's disgusting!" panics @@RANDOMNAME@@, your minister of hygiene, dressed in a biohazard suit. "We can't let people spit on you! Or anyone for that matter! That's how diseases spr..." @@HE@@ fleas at the sight of a discarded sock.
[effect] talking with your mouth full is a criminal offense

[Candlewhisper Archive]

You're right, it is kind of bad. Probably best to wait on your second draft before proper comment, then.

[Australian rePublic]

Bump for second draft

[Candlewhisper Archive]

[desc] 83 year old Ellenic immigrant, @@RANDOMFEMALENAME_1@@, was fast asleep when police raided her house at 3 in the morning and dragged her out of bed. Her alleged crime, spitting on you during a press conference. After 40 minutes of interrogation, she stuck to her story of warding off the evil eye, causing the police to bring her to your office.

There's a few problems here.

First off is the big problem, which is that the story makes no sense. If someone spat on you doing a press conference, why is the arrest taking at place at 3 in the morning rather than at the time? Why would someone have the police force entry into their house for a crime this small? Why would an 83-year-old be at a press conference? Why would her sticking to her story be the specific thing that causes the police to bring her to your office? Why does she think you were aiming the evil eye at her?

Secondly, there's concepts introduced with no explanation. What does "Ellenic" mean? If you're going to introduce a new nation, you need to provide at least a word or two explaining why that nationality is relevant to the story.

Thirdly, there's a load of redundant text that adds neither humour not useful information. Does it matter how long she was interrogated for? Why do we care what has happened to her?

This is basically terrible writing, Aussie. We know you can do better than this.

I would suggest that a sharper presentation would have been something like this:

An old woman was arrested for spitting at one of your ministers. On interrogation, she claims she was warding off the "evil eye", as thanks to a rare genetic mutation the minister has one eye that is vividly blue.

You get just the context that is needed, and no more.

Feel free to take that, though you should be aware that the options will need working over on the same principles.

[Australian rePublic]

[desc] 83 year old Ellenic immigrant, @@RANDOMFEMALENAME_1@@, was fast asleep when police raided her house at 3 in the morning and dragged her out of bed. Her alleged crime, spitting on you during a press conference. After 40 minutes of interrogation, she stuck to her story of warding off the evil eye, causing the police to bring her to your office.

There's a few problems here.

First off is the big problem, which is that the story makes no sense. If someone spat on you doing a press conference, why is the arrest taking at place at 3 in the morning rather than at the time? Why would someone have the police force entry into their house for a crime this small? Why would an 83-year-old be at a press conference? Why would her sticking to her story be the specific thing that causes the police to bring her to your office? Why does she think you were aiming the evil eye at her?

Secondly, there's concepts introduced with no explanation. What does "Ellenic" mean? If you're going to introduce a new nation, you need to provide at least a word or two explaining why that nationality is relevant to the story.

Thirdly, there's a load of redundant text that adds neither humour not useful information. Does it matter how long she was interrogated for? Why do we care what has happened to her?

This is basically terrible writing, Aussie. We know you can do better than this.

I would suggest that a sharper presentation would have been something like this:

An old woman was arrested for spitting at one of your ministers. On interrogation, she claims she was warding off the "evil eye", as thanks to a rare genetic mutation the minister has one eye that is vividly blue.

You get just the context that is needed, and no more.

Feel free to take that, though you should be aware that the options will need working over on the same principles.

Thanks. I cut out all the crap, and went straight to the point. Also, you misunderstood. The person spat on is the recipiant, not perpetrator of the evil eye. "Pousou, pouso, na mi se matiaso" means "I don't want anyone to curse you" NOT "I don't want you to curse me"

[Australian rePublic]

[desc] 83 year old Ellenic immigrant, @@RANDOMFEMALENAME_1@@, was fast asleep when police raided her house at 3 in the morning and dragged her out of bed. Her alleged crime, spitting on you during a press conference. After 40 minutes of interrogation, she stuck to her story of warding off the evil eye, causing the police to bring her to your office.

There's a few problems here.

First off is the big problem, which is that the story makes no sense. If someone spat on you doing a press conference, why is the arrest taking at place at 3 in the morning rather than at the time? Why would someone have the police force entry into their house for a crime this small? Why would an 83-year-old be at a press conference? Why would her sticking to her story be the specific thing that causes the police to bring her to your office? Why does she think you were aiming the evil eye at her?

Secondly, there's concepts introduced with no explanation. What does "Ellenic" mean? If you're going to introduce a new nation, you need to provide at least a word or two explaining why that nationality is relevant to the story.

Thirdly, there's a load of redundant text that adds neither humour not useful information. Does it matter how long she was interrogated for? Why do we care what has happened to her?

This is basically terrible writing, Aussie. We know you can do better than this.

I would suggest that a sharper presentation would have been something like this:

An old woman was arrested for spitting at one of your ministers. On interrogation, she claims she was warding off the "evil eye", as thanks to a rare genetic mutation the minister has one eye that is vividly blue.

You get just the context that is needed, and no more.

Feel free to take that, though you should be aware that the options will need working over on the same principles.

Whilst it's hard to find info, I think the tradition states that Satan can't read your mind. Therefore, if you talk about how good looking I am, or you wish me luck, Satan will know that you like me, and he and his deamons will want to curse me. However, if you spit on me, it'll make Satan and his deamons think that you don't like me. Therefore, they will leave me alone