DRAFT: Personality disorder counciling

[Kand Sovi]

Draft: Personality disorder counseling
Category: Health
Area of effect: Research

Background:
Personality disorder has been affected in teens and adults, mostly affected by mental illness. It has been caused by unlimited anger, unlimited loneliness, experiencing discomfort if not at center of attention, suicidal thoughts, not able to control feeling and unlimited sadness and crying. Yet, personality disorder could be lifelong if no action gets taken.

In a way to fix the problem, there will be the following solutions:

a)Expand mental hospitals for research and counseling purposes.

b)Hire mental health councilors and therapists, open to give patients one or a combination:
-Frequent counseling
-Group therapy
-Music therapy
-Sensory therapy, like touch therapy
-Art therapy

c)Hire researchers and health analysts to collect data

d)Begin funds for all counciling and therapies

In a way to decrease personality disorders, there will be hope for the counseling and therapies to work.

[Araraukar]

OOC: There so much wrong here that I feel like throwing some psychology books at you to educate yourself with, but considering how weighty said books tend to be, that'd probably count as attempted murder...

Is English a foreign language to you? Your use of language is very clumsy and I think it might be what's causing most of the issues here (in addition to just getting some facts wrong). I would also suggest searching the passed proposals thread on this forum with some keywords to do with your topic to see what has already been mandated. I'd definitely try "health" and "patient" to begin with.

Also please be aware that just throwing money (expanding hospitals and hiring more people) at something like a mental health issue, isn't going to actually have much effect. Additionally I don't see how this would fit in the Research AoE.

[Grays Harbor]

OOC: STOP THROWING TOPICS AGAINST THE WALL TO SEE WHAT STICKS

Edit: This is really getting to be spam. There are 5 topics on the first page, half-baked ideas, that you post and abandon.

[Sierra Lyricalia]

OOC: STOP THROWING TOPICS AGAINST THE WALL TO SEE WHAT STICKS

Edit: This is really getting to be spam. There are 5 topics on the first page, half-baked ideas, that you post and abandon.

OOC: I would take this to heart, if I were you. You have one or two drafts that might have the potential to pass (I'm thinking mainly of the autism one), if and only if you take the time and make the effort to improve it and it alone for a period of weeks at least, during which the rest of the forum can help you improve it. But this is possible only if you acknowledge that 1) writing a good resolution is a marathon, not a sprint (in other words it's a long time commitment with a few changes once in a while, rather than "Hey, here's a new draft, let's try this one now!"), and 2) you are going to have to make many major changes in order to get it into submittable order. Right now none of your ideas is ready for submission. One or two of them might actually get there, but only if you make the commitment to take the time and make the effort to get it there. I can wish you good luck, but what you need more than luck is mental fortitude bordering on a slight amount of obsession. Patience is the number one virtue to cultivate in this game.

[Kenmoria]

Draft: Personality disorder counseling This is yet another one of your drafts. I suggest sticking to one good topic and improving one it rather than throwing several at the forum. On another note, the title of your opening post misspells counselling as “counciling”
Category: Health
Area of effect: Research

Background:
Personality disorder has been affected in teens and adults, mostly affected by mental illness. It has been caused by unlimited anger, unlimited loneliness, experiencing discomfort if not at center of attention, suicidal thoughts, not able to control feeling and unlimited sadness and crying. Yet, personality disorder could be lifelong if no action gets taken. You have not yet said or defined what personality disorders are, which could be a good idea somewhere in the proposal. Also, this is quite incorrect grammatically, which makes it barely understandable to a potential voter.

In a way to fix the problem, there will be the following solutions:

a)Expand mental hospitals for research and counseling purposes. Who will be doing the expanding? What will this be funded by? And will these hospitals deal with mental health issues other than personality disorders?

b)Hire mental health councilors and therapists, open to give patients one or a combination: Once again, who is hiring these? Is it hospitals, member nations or the WA? Also, a councilor is a member of a council, you meant counsellor.

-Frequent counseling How frequent?
-Group therapy
-Music therapy
-Sensory therapy, like touch therapy
-Art therapy It is pointless to try and list every type of therapy that should be given, since there will always be others you could not remember. Just put “a variety”, “different techniques” or something similar.

c)Hire researchers and health analysts to collect data On what? Asthma rates in the elderly? All of your clauses need to be more specific to the topic you are addressing.

d)Begin funds for all counciling and therapies Are these WA funds? Or funds in member states’ budgets?

In a way to decrease personality disorders, there will be hope for the counseling and therapies to work. Only is this draft receives editing that takes into account the feeedback you have been receiving, on many of your drafts, will this be true.

This is not the worst first proposal I’ve ever seen; it does at least look like a law, but it won’t come close to passing without you taking into account what everyone has said and start working on your draft for an extended period of time.

[Bears Armed]

Personality disorder has been affected in teens and adults, mostly affected by mental illness. It has been caused by unlimited anger, unlimited loneliness, experiencing discomfort if not at center of attention, suicidal thoughts, not able to control feeling and unlimited sadness and crying.

OOC: Most of those listed "causes" are actually effects of living with -- and having to fit into society with -- various personality disorders, instead.

[Separatist Peoples]

Ooc: again, we have a good idea for a draft with a poor execution. When you write law, you are writing the framework on which a profession or part of society bases its operation. Such a framework must be specific enough to provide guidance while loose enough to allow flexibility. That usually involves identifying discrete goals or limits, and directing means only where necessary.

This...doesnt. None of your drafts generate specific goals. They all involve raising awareness or Moar Funding. You might consider reading real world statutes to get a feel for what we do here.