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Glorious Sport Of The Motherland [Ashkam Domestic Thread]

A battle ground for the sportsmen and women of nations worldwide. [In character]
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Glorious Sport Of The Motherland [Ashkam Domestic Thread]

Postby Ashkam » Sun Mar 11, 2018 7:40 pm

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What is Ashkam?

Ashkam, officially the Democratic People’s Republic of Ashkam, is an island nation made up of the formerly nomadic and divided Ashkamite tribes and the Finnic peoples that traditionally have lived in the south of the nation. The nation has a cold and wet climate and much of the country is covered in rough terrain, leading to a relatively low population of twenty four million. Its history was shaped by the Ashkam Civil War of the 1950s, which saw communism enacted and the forced unification of the Ashkamite tribes. The generations after the Civil War would know a completely different world than their predecessors, and would only be familiar with an era where the Workers Party of Ashkam dominated all aspects of life.

The nation has been rated as one of the least free ones in the multiverse and maintains isolationist policies, only importing from a few locations and keeping a focus on self sufficiency and independence from foreign influences. While the nation is officially a democratic republic, the vast majority of political parties are banned or repressed and only the Workers Party holds legitimate power. The leader of the nation is a Chairman that serves five year terms, but this position has been dominated from the beginning by the political dynasty of the Tanai family, who were leaders on the revolutionary side of the Civil War. Chairman Rada Tanai has served two full terms and rules the country with an iron fist, with a strong cult of personality existing around him and the rest of the family.

Ashkam also has a poor human rights record and its twenty five million citizens live in fear of a government that has near unlimited power, without checks and balances. Political dissent is largely forbidden, and while the country masquerades as being first world, the government’s excessive control makes it a very different place than most modern nations. All sectors of the economy are run by the state, with varying degrees of privatization on the micro level. Ashkam still has a blue collar economy and many Ashkamites work in mines, on farms, or on assembly lines, rather than offices.

Ashkamite Cities


This is the list of top ten Ashkamite cities by population:

1: Jestana (c) - 3,427,000
2: Hesevan - 821,000
3: Haska - 630,000
4: Parika - 564,000
5: Astara - 320,000
6: Pumo - 300,000
7: Barlo - 275,000
8: Dar Mora - 256,000
9: Diro - 210,000
10: Bahar - 204,000


Ashkam Top League

The premier football league in Ashkam is the Top League, which is made up of eight state owned clubs. Four are located in the Ashkamite north, and four are located in the Finnich south. Because of state ownership, Ashkamite clubs typically do not spend much money and rely on the government allocating players to balance the squads, as well as their academy systems. Potential star athletes are allocated to sporting clubs at young ages in Ashkam by the government, meaning clubs that are located in larger cities with more potential players are usually more successful.

The Top League is also closed off to foreigners, and only accepts players that were born in Ashkam or otherwise have Ashkamite citizenship through some other means, which is rare. A foreign player has never played in the Top League, nor are Ashkamite players legally allowed to move to clubs abroad through transfers or free agency. The Top League was formed out of the remnants of the Territorial League, which was mostly made up of northern teams. This is the current record of Top League winners.

Season One: Dynamo Jestana
Season Two: Lokomotiv Astara
Season Three: Dynamo Jestana
Season Four: Dynamo Jestana
Season Five: Hesevan SK
Season Six: Lokomotiv Astara
Season Seven: Dynamo Jestana


The league and its clubs are widely seen by outsiders as a tool to help control the people, through distracting them with sports and promoting the worship of celebrity footballers who all seem to have very pro government views. Of course, this is because they don’t have much of a choice. The league is an organ of the state and players are expected to have absolute loyalty to the nation that pays them. Those who don’t face stiff consequences, often disappearing for long stretches under strange circumstances, after sustaining “injuries”. Because they live in state housing just like the rest of the country, and are under direct watch by security services, Top League athletes have less freedom than many may assume at first...


Ashkam Fight League

Fighting is part of the culture of Ashkam, and because of this, the most popular sporting league outside of the Top League is the AFL, which focuses on mixed martial arts and kickboxing. Fighters are employees of the state and cards are held frequently at cities around the country. After the dissolution of the Territorial League, the AFL is the oldest sporting organization in the country. Like in other sports, athletes for the AFL are found and recruited at young ages, and trained at state owned academies, through coercion in many cases.
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Postby Ashkam » Sun Mar 11, 2018 7:40 pm

reserved for recordkeeping
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Postby Ashkam » Mon Mar 12, 2018 9:32 pm

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The Football Federation of Ashkam Presents... The Ashkam Top League Database


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The ATL is the top flight of football in Ashkam, and all clubs in this division are owned by the state and funded with both state money and whatever profits they make from things such as ticket and merchandise sales. This has resulted in a smaller top flight than most nations, with other leagues existing as amateur organizations that are, for both legal and financial purposes, not actual corporations. The size of the ATL has been at eight clubs since its inception, and clubs are generally evenly divided between the north and south of the country. Each club plays every other club four times in a season, for a total of 32 matches per club. Because of the unique structure of the league, there is no promotion and relegation, and the only way for a club to join the top flight is through expansion. This is the current database of clubs in the top flight.

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Dynamo Jestana


The club from the capital that embodies everything that the Ashkamite government would like to convey to its citizens. It’s viewed as a very hard working club despite their marque status, and has its roots in the electricity industry. In the days of the Territorial League, the club was founded by electricity workers, but became something so much more than just another profession club. The Reds became the face of the league, and the face of sport in Ashkam in general. The government claims that they don’t have any advantage over other sides, but it’s clear from the allocation that Dynamo Jestana is the club of the party and the club that gets access to some of the best transfers and up and coming prospects. Of course, the latter can also be attributed to their location in the capital, which has more people and more young players in general to recruit to their academy. They play at the 76,000 seater Rusen Tanai Stadium, which was constructed by and named after the founder of the country. It’s the largest stadium in the country by a good margin and reflects the prestige of their club. Dynamo’s fans are known as the Scarlet Guard, and are famous for their devotion to both the club and the Tanai family. Basically, you could say that Dynamo is the national team just as much as the actual national team is.

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Lokomotiv Astara


Another industrial team to find more success than they expected is Lokomotiv Astara, which has a reputation for putting on strong attacking performances and living and dying with every flick of the ball and every long shot. The club was founded some ways away from the capital, in the city of Astara, and as such had less resources to work with to build a winning team. Fortunately, Lokomotiv has always been managed by smart people, and those smarts made the best use of their government allocated assets and boosted them above clubs from other cities with larger populations but worse management teams. Their club nickname is the Ravens, and their appearance has certainly signaled bad luck for other teams that are above them in the standings. When Astara win titles, they seem to do it as underdogs, while still doing it in impressive fashion.

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Hesevan SK


The club from the second largest city in the country uses its population to its advantage when recruiting youth players and finding good local talents from the amateur football scene. They also have a financial edge over most clubs and they have a pretty strong brand, appealing to Ashkamite identity and straying from the very pro government support of a club like Dynamo Jestana. In fact, this club even has sort of a rebellious streak to it, and has developed a deep rivalry with Dynamo over this. Their matches are known as the Northern Derby, and often decide the upper spots of the standings or even the titles. Hesevan fans like to claim that they’ve been slighted by the government for their rivalry with the party’s club, and claim that if it wasn’t for that, they would have just as many titles as Dynamo. Their fanbase is the second largest in the country and their hardcore supporters are known as the Reapers for their intimidating appearances.

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CSKA Haska


Technically, all members of CSKA Haska are soldiers, and this is the only club whose players can be seen training with the military at certain times to keep up the impression of being ordinary citizens like anyone else. But it’s clear that these are professional players rather than soldiers, and they have the advantage of being able to select from the army rather than looking for players in the local area. Their players are some of the highest paid in the league because of their close ties with the government, but they haven’t historically had the same success as some of the more well run clubs. Ironically, Haska is known as one of the more unprofessional clubs in the league and their players seem to frequently make mistakes in crucial moments, costing them their chances to compete for titles. They’re out of the race by the last few weeks most seasons, but at the same time, their ties to the army give them enough of an edge to stay in the hunt and stay above the mid table teams almost all of the time. They are, however, the top southern club.

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FC Dynamo Barlo


On the southern coast, Dynamo Barlo represents the fishing communities of the shoreline, and their way of life that has been mostly untouched by communism and the rule of the Tanai family. The area has always been a simpler one that has a focus on smaller communities and farming, and industrialization never hit Barlo as hard as other traditional regions. This culture spread to the football club and its players are known as blue collar workers who generally have strong ties to the lifestyle of the community that they’re representing. Many of them were in the fishing or logging businesses before their careers in football began. They play at the Barlo Municipal Stadium, which is the closest one in the league to the sea.

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SKA Dar Mora


Sponsored by the army but not tied to the army as much as CSKA, Dar Mora’s team is a rough around the edges outfit that perfectly represents the roughness of the city that they represent. The northern city of Dar Mora itself is mainly known for crime, especially organ harvesting and human trafficking, and for its nightlife scene and hard industries. It’s not the kind of place that most people would willfully move to, but those that are there have embraced the reputation of the city, and SKA Dar Mora represents those fans well. The club has been accused of being dirty, but if they played in the capital or in Hesevan, they would probably be loved for embodying the grit that the Workers Party encourages. Dar Mora previously had a strong tribal identity, but that was repressed by the government after the revolution. Now, they say that the club promotes the “new” Dar Mora, that is, the version of Dar Mora that is shaped by nationalism and support for unification. Still, their Dar Mora Bad Boys fans are cautious of the government and communism, making for some interesting matches with Jestana and CSKA.

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Parika United


If there was such thing as a luxury team in a communist league, it might be Parika United. They try to play attractive football and value that over just getting wins or playing with hustle, unlike some of the other clubs in the league. Their supporters tend to be upper class citizens with ties to the Party, because even though Ashkamite society is supposed to be classless, there’s still socioeconomic divides that come as a result of one party having all the power. Of course, they don’t receive the same support that Jestana does, and so Parika United has fallen on hard times and isn’t the outfit they were during the Territorial League days. They have some of the best branding in the league, but their success in the days of the Top League ended there.

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FC Arsenal Diro


Named after the weapons industry that turned the town of Diro into a true bustling city, Arsenal is a similarly young club that was created out of a merger between Dynamo Diro and the Diro Spartans. Their club is as young as the league itself is, and hasn’t yet found the success that others have achieved. Diro is one of the better developed cities in the entire country however, which may be because of its modernity, and this makes the local talent pool in Diro disproportionately strong. The club is expected to reach its potential eventually after drawing more from that talent pool, although fan apathy is a problem and the 28,000 seater Diro Arms Factory Stadium is rarely sold out.
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Postby Ashkam » Mon Mar 12, 2018 9:53 pm

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Ashkamite National Team To Enter World Cup, Will Crush Pig Nations

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The kits of the new national team, produced by Kommunist Fashion


At a ceremony held in downtown Jestana, Wise and Honorable Chairman Rada Tanai announced that the Democratic People’s Republic of Ashkam will compete in the World Cup going forward. The World Cup has been boycotted by Ashkam under the watchful rule of the Tanai family because of the corrupting influence of foreign nations on the Ashkamite populace, but starting with the 80th qualification cycle, the nation will compete with the intent of improving its reputation internationally and spreading the sense of wonder and serenity that all Ashkamite citizens have when thinking of their country and government.

The players for this new team will be chosen directly by Chairman Tanai, from the pool of players currently competing in the Ashkam Top League. According to the press conference, the home ground of the new team will be Rusen Tanai Stadium, and every national team match will be broadcast to the public on public television channel Radio Ashkam. Those without televisions will be able to watch the matches in public squares, and at local football stadiums across the nation. According to the Wise and Honorable Chairman, the team will be managed and staffed by the smartest coaches in the world, who will use their knowledge to surprise foreign enemies with tactics that they have never seen before. The first manager of the national team is expected to be Dren Husali, former manager of CSKA Haska and distant relative of the Excellent and Honorable Tanai family.

Capitalist pig nations are not familiar with hard work and most publications favor Ashkam to win against the majority of these opponents. Unlike theirs, our people are strong from working in factories, mines, on railways, and on other industrial projects that require effort. We expect to defeat the paper pushers from capitalist pig nations with ease, and Chairman Tanai has already scheduled the victory parade for Ashkam’s qualification to the 80th World Cup. The parade will run through Jestana and will finish in front of the Workers Revolutionary Square, where statues of the players will be unveiled next to the other statues of socialist Ashkamite heroes.

Should Ashkam not qualify, according to the Chairman, it will be because of corruption by the capitalist World Cup administration, which oppresses communist nations through biased refereeing and secretive sabotage. The FAA has noted that very few communist nations qualify for the World Cup compared to capitalist ones, and given the amount of communist nations in the world, this can not be a simple coincidence and is evidence of systematic bias against certain nations for their chosen forms of government. However, the Askamite talent pool is skilled enough that not qualifying is “not a worry” according to the federation and the Chairman.

The national team roster will be announced after the completion of the Top League season. Until then, stay tuned to Ashkam News Pages for updates on the team’s progress towards winning the World Cup!
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Postby Ashkam » Wed Mar 14, 2018 1:14 pm

FFA Ashkam Top League

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Matchday One
Arsenal Diro 0–0 SKA Dar Mora
CSKA Haska 4–3 Parika United
Dynamo Jestana 4–4 Lokomotiv Astara
FC Dynamo Barlo 1–3 Hesevan SK


Matchday Two
SKA Dar Mora 0–0 Hesevan SK
Lokomotiv Astara 0–2 FC Dynamo Barlo
Parika United 1–2 Dynamo Jestana
Arsenal Diro 2–3 CSKA Haska


Matchday Three
CSKA Haska 0–0 SKA Dar Mora
Dynamo Jestana 3–1 Arsenal Diro
FC Dynamo Barlo 1–1 Parika United
Hesevan SK 1–0 Lokomotiv Astara


Matchday Four
SKA Dar Mora 0–1 Lokomotiv Astara
Parika United 3–2 Hesevan SK
Arsenal Diro 0–2 FC Dynamo Barlo
CSKA Haska 0–0 Dynamo Jestana


Matchday Five
Dynamo Jestana 1–0 SKA Dar Mora
FC Dynamo Barlo 0–2 CSKA Haska
Hesevan SK 0–1 Arsenal Diro
Lokomotiv Astara 2–2 Parika United


Matchday Six
SKA Dar Mora 0–1 Parika United
Arsenal Diro 2–4 Lokomotiv Astara
CSKA Haska 3–1 Hesevan SK
Dynamo Jestana 1–1 FC Dynamo Barlo


Matchday Seven
FC Dynamo Barlo 0–2 SKA Dar Mora
Hesevan SK 1–1 Dynamo Jestana
Lokomotiv Astara 2–1 CSKA Haska
Parika United 3–6 Arsenal Diro


  Ashkam Top League     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 CSKA Haska 7 4 2 1 13 8 +5 14
2 Dynamo Jestana 7 3 4 0 12 8 +4 13
3 Lokomotiv Astara 7 3 2 2 13 12 +1 11
4 Hesevan SK 7 2 2 3 8 9 −1 8
5 FC Dynamo Barlo 7 2 2 3 7 9 −2 8
6 Parika United 7 2 2 3 14 17 −3 8
7 Arsenal Diro 7 2 1 4 12 15 −3 7
8 SKA Dar Mora 7 1 3 3 2 3 −1 6


Manager Bryan Hatala has attributed the success of CSKA Haska to the team’s youth and pragmatic tactics, featuring adaptability not often seen in the Top League. After seven weeks, the team is first in the league and was able to surpass northern rivals Dynamo Jestana. Haska has one loss, but a number of draws from their rivals kept them in the lead in the standings. They’ve also already drew with Jestana, who were the favorites coming into the season and were supposed to defeat CSKA by a score of 1-3, according to the oddsmakers. On matchday six, they would beat fellow rival and enemy northern club Hesevan SK, behind three goals from wingers Shabazz Galinen and Dan Ransom. Hatala talked to the press recently about his team’s success.

On the team’s youth:

“Starting striker Corey Hariri is only 21, Dan Ransom is 23, central defender Peter Kahvanen is 21, right back Saki Felles is 21… Part of the reason for our youth is that we’re a military club and soldiers tend to be young, but I don’t treat it as a disadvantage like others might. Having a younger squad helps to fight complacency, because the players aren’t as certain about themselves, and they don’t have as much experience. They don’t do everything the same way every time because they haven’t settled into one way of acting. And that’s part of why we can adapt as well as we do, to different situations.”

On the team’s fulcrum:

“I think that has to be [attacking midfielder] Evgeni Hasakhan. Of course, you all know the story about how he wasn’t good enough at Hesevan and how he came here and made a commitment to the Army to get away from that club, but he’s really stepped his game up and we did good to accept his offer and pick him up in the offseason. He has six assists right now and if he keeps his training levels up, I think he can maintain that pace. Both Galinen and Ransom play well off of him and if you remove him from the picture I doubt they have as many goals as they do right now. Our other fulcrum could be Saki Felles, because she gets the ball down the pitch faster than other teams can respond to it, and many of our possessions begin with her taking the ball and then sending it towards the midfield.”

On drawing with Jestana:


“We could have won that match but we were playing not to lose, which worked even if it left us feeling like we could have grabbed the three points. Corey missed two chances in front of goal, so I suppose it could have been 2-0, but if we were playing more aggressively I feel we would have conceded to [striker] Martin Majala or [star winger] Ara Barakhan. Shutting out Dynamo isn’t easy, not since Justin Havanen took over there and made their style more attacking with that 4-3-3 of his, and I don’t think I would change things if I had the chance to go back and call that game again. The two best teams in the league drew, which is expected.”

On military commitments:

“They say we’re not a club of soldiers and that we’re professionals wearing the army’s badges, but I think that’s a lie, there’s no other club that routinely trains with the military and makes its players split time between playing and doing military related tasks. Our players might not do as much as normal soldiers with no ties to the club, but that’s life in this league. Dynamo Jestana isn’t filled with energy workers anymore and Lokomotiv Astara has no connection to the railway industry these days. I don’t see Arsenal Diro players on the weapons factory floor, either. We do more for what our club is named after than any of the other profession clubs in the league.”

On title hopes:

“We can absolutely win the title. We’ve come close in the past but this is the first year that we’ve really been flexible with our tactics and shifted to face whatever club we happen to be facing at the time. We also have a family atmosphere in the dressing room this time and I think the big city clubs wish that they could be as close as we are, as players and staff here in Haska. We have a chip on our shoulder from past years so motivation isn’t a problem. We just need to keep executing and treating each individual task as important, and nobody is better at that than the military.”
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Postby Ashkam » Wed Apr 11, 2018 7:52 pm

FFA Ashkam Top League

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Matchday Eight

SKA Dar Mora 1–0 Arsenal Diro
Parika United 0–1 CSKA Haska
Lokomotiv Astara 0–3 Dynamo Jestana
Hesevan SK 1–0 FC Dynamo Barlo


Matchday Nine

Hesevan SK 0–1 SKA Dar Mora
FC Dynamo Barlo 1–2 Lokomotiv Astara
Dynamo Jestana 0–1 Parika United
CSKA Haska 2–2 Arsenal Diro


Matchday Ten

SKA Dar Mora 0–2 CSKA Haska
Arsenal Diro 1–1 Dynamo Jestana
Parika United 1–2 FC Dynamo Barlo
Lokomotiv Astara 1–1 Hesevan SK


Matchday Eleven

Lokomotiv Astara 0–0 SKA Dar Mora
Hesevan SK 1–0 Parika United
FC Dynamo Barlo 0–1 Arsenal Diro
Dynamo Jestana 2–3 CSKA Haska


Matchday Twelve

SKA Dar Mora 1–1 Dynamo Jestana
CSKA Haska 1–0 FC Dynamo Barlo
Arsenal Diro 0–1 Hesevan SK
Parika United 0–0 Lokomotiv Astara


Matchday Thirteen

Parika United 0–0 SKA Dar Mora
Lokomotiv Astara 2–3 Arsenal Diro
Hesevan SK 0–1 CSKA Haska
FC Dynamo Barlo 2–2 Dynamo Jestana

Matchday Fourteen

SKA Dar Mora 1–1 FC Dynamo Barlo
Dynamo Jestana 2–2 Hesevan SK
CSKA Haska 4–2 Lokomotiv Astara
Arsenal Diro 3–2 Parika United


 Ashkam Top League     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 CSKA Haska 14 10 3 1 27 14 +13 33
2 Dynamo Jestana 14 4 8 2 23 18 +5 20
3 Hesevan SK 14 5 4 5 14 14 0 19
4 Arsenal Diro 14 5 3 6 22 24 −2 18
5 Lokomotiv Astara 14 4 5 5 20 24 −4 17
6 SKA Dar Mora 14 3 7 4 6 7 −1 16
7 FC Dynamo Barlo 14 3 4 7 13 18 −5 13
8 Parika United 14 3 4 7 18 24 −6 13


Prior to the matchday nine clash between CSKA and Arsenal Diro, popular Arsenal defender Gabriel Anvar was arrested by the Ministry of Internal Security for possession of rebel material. According to reports coming from the ground in Haska, that rebel material came in the form of printouts and flyers found in Anvar's luggage, which was searched by MIS agents after an anonymous tip sent from someone closer to the player. Anvar, 28, is a key member of the Arsenal Diro squad, and Diro manager Alen Saria blamed the draw, in which CSKA Haska came back from a goal down in the second half, on the team not having their defensive anchor. In the postmatch press conference, Saria questioned the decision to arrest Anvar.

“This was done in a rather brash way. I'm not jumping to conclusions but I believe it is suspicious that there was rebel material in Gabriel's bag, since he knows the punishment for carrying it and isn't the type of player to take major risks like this, for no reason. But the MIS found what they found and they showed it to us, so it was there somehow. The club will be helping Gabriel on the legal side of this and we hope to have him back in the side in a few weeks after clearing this up as some type of misunderstanding,” he told the press. Anvar is currently being held at the Haska Central Detention Center, one of the largest prisons in the country and the primary holding area for rebels, traitors, and deserters.

Two Arsenal Diro fans protested the decision to arrest Anvar, by unfurling a banner during the match that accused CSKA Haska of orchestrating the incident for their own gain. Haska manager Bryan Hatala, however, laughed at the claims and after the match, gave an interview reminding everyone that the Army and the MIS are separate organizations, and that the streaking Haska team has no reason to fix a match against a less talented Diro team that is largely overperforming based on their talent level. Anvar has still not been released, but Diro is currently in fourth as Haska maintains a thirteen point lead on northern rivals and title favorites Dynamo Jestana.
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Postby Ashkam » Thu Apr 19, 2018 11:54 am

FFA Ashkam Top League

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Matchday Fifteen

Arsenal Diro 1–0 SKA Dar Mora
CSKA Haska 4–3 Parika United
Dynamo Jestana 1–0 Lokomotiv Astara
FC Dynamo Barlo 0–2 Hesevan SK


Matchday Sixteen

SKA Dar Mora 1–0 Hesevan SK
Lokomotiv Astara 3–3 FC Dynamo Barlo
Parika United 0–0 Dynamo Jestana
Arsenal Diro 3–3 CSKA Haska


Matchday Seventeen

CSKA Haska 3–2 SKA Dar Mora
Dynamo Jestana 3–2 Arsenal Diro
FC Dynamo Barlo 0–2 Parika United
Hesevan SK 1–1 Lokomotiv Astara


Matchday Eighteen

SKA Dar Mora 1–0 Lokomotiv Astara
Parika United 2–1 Hesevan SK
Arsenal Diro 1–1 FC Dynamo Barlo
CSKA Haska 2–4 Dynamo Jestana


Matchday Nineteen

Dynamo Jestana 1–0 SKA Dar Mora
FC Dynamo Barlo 0–2 CSKA Haska
Hesevan SK 0–1 Arsenal Diro
Lokomotiv Astara 1–2 Parika United


Matchday Twenty

SKA Dar Mora 1–1 Parika United
Arsenal Diro 2–2 Lokomotiv Astara
CSKA Haska 4–1 Hesevan SK
Dynamo Jestana 1–1 FC Dynamo Barlo


Matchday Twenty One

FC Dynamo Barlo 2–0 SKA Dar Mora
Hesevan SK 0–0 Dynamo Jestana
Lokomotiv Astara 1–3 CSKA Haska
Parika United 0–1 Arsenal Diro


Matchday Twenty Two

SKA Dar Mora 0–1 Arsenal Diro
Parika United 0–2 CSKA Haska
Lokomotiv Astara 1–4 Dynamo Jestana
Hesevan SK 0–1 FC Dynamo Barlo


Matchday Twenty Three

Hesevan SK 2–1 SKA Dar Mora
FC Dynamo Barlo 5–2 Lokomotiv Astara
Dynamo Jestana 3–3 Parika United
CSKA Haska 1–1 Arsenal Diro


Matchday Twenty Four

SKA Dar Mora 1–1 CSKA Haska
Arsenal Diro 0–1 Dynamo Jestana
Parika United 3–1 FC Dynamo Barlo
Lokomotiv Astara 3–4 Hesevan SK


 Ashkam Top League     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 CSKA Haska 24 16 6 2 52 30 +22 54
2 Dynamo Jestana 24 10 12 2 41 27 +14 42
3 Arsenal Diro 24 9 7 8 35 35 0 34
4 Hesevan SK 24 8 6 10 25 28 −3 30
5 Parika United 24 7 7 10 34 38 −4 28
6 FC Dynamo Barlo 24 6 7 11 27 34 −7 25
7 SKA Dar Mora 24 5 9 10 13 19 −6 24
8 Lokomotiv Astara 24 4 8 12 34 50 −16 20


After their 1-4 home loss to rivals Dynamo Jestana, fans of Lokomotiv Astara rioted in the stadium. These riots caused major property damage and resulted in seats being torn up and thrown onto the pitch, the goalposts being ripped out of the ground, and the pitch being set on fire in multiple places. Lokomotiv Astara players including captain Vae Haley were able to quell the riots inside the stadium, but upon leaving the venue, the crowd of rioters moved through the railway district and continued their riot, clashing with police and trashing stores believed to have sympathies for the capital city.

Police were finally able to contain the riots, but only after hours, and night had already fallen by the time the police response was able to end the riot. Numerous members of the riot crowd were arrested, while others fled the scene and dispersed without force being used. The club reduced a statement the day after the match, condemning the rioters and revealing the tens of thousands of dollars of property damage caused by the rioting incidents. Fan groups in Astara, however, have defended the actions and stated that the riots should serve as a wake up call for a club board that has lost its way and failed to put out a competitive team or stand up for the interests of the fans.
Last edited by Ashkam on Thu Apr 19, 2018 11:54 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Ashkam » Thu Apr 19, 2018 12:51 pm

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AFL Calls For Foreign Fighters!

The Ashkam Fight League is opening its doors to foreigners for the first time ever as it steps outside of Ashkam to hold a show in the city state of Renzhen, an island protectorate of Ashkam! Captured by the Ashkamite government in 1960 and integrated into the country, the city of Renzhen serves as a meeting point between Ashkam and the outside world, which has often been closed off from the mainland country. Now, Renzhen will serve as a meeting point again for Ashkam and the outside, as it hosts the first AFL show featuring foreign fighters.

The best kickboxing in the multiverse will be on show in the city of a million people, as Ashkamite lightweight champion Tyler Rezin and top contender Saef Alhar take on two yet to be announced opponents in front of a crowd of 23,000 at Renzhen Arena. Rezin is 28-2, while Alhar will put his undefeated 19-0 record on the line in the co-main event of the evening. The undercard will feature a fight with top female lightweight Alisha Akmedia, who will make her AFL debut after going 21-3 in the regionals.

The schedule has not yet been set completely, nor has the date of the contest. Interested foreign kickboxers who compete in the 155 lbs division are encouraged to contact the Ashkamite Ministry of Sports with their information. The Ministry of Sports will reply as soon as possible with further information. At the moment, three lightweight fighters are needed, and each fighter will be paid $700,000 to show and $900,000 to win. Each fight will be contested over three five minute rounds, with the exception of the lightweight title fight that will take place across five rounds of five minutes each.

Form For Interested Participants

Name:

Age:

Gender:

National Origin:

Handedness:

Style Modifier:

Short Bio:

TG to Ashkam... The bouts will be scorinated using a custom system involving dice.
Last edited by Ashkam on Thu Apr 19, 2018 12:53 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Ashkam » Sun Apr 22, 2018 3:43 pm

FFA Ashkam Top League

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Matchday Twenty Five

Lokomotiv Astara 1–0 SKA Dar Mora
Hesevan SK 4–2 Parika United
FC Dynamo Barlo 0–3 Arsenal Diro
Dynamo Jestana 2–2 CSKA Haska


Matchday Twenty Six

SKA Dar Mora 0–0 Dynamo Jestana
CSKA Haska 3–4 FC Dynamo Barlo
Arsenal Diro 1–0 Hesevan SK
Parika United 4–4 Lokomotiv Astara


Matchday Twenty Seven

Parika United 1–3 SKA Dar Mora
Lokomotiv Astara 3–2 Arsenal Diro
Hesevan SK 0–2 CSKA Haska
FC Dynamo Barlo 3–3 Dynamo Jestana


Matchday Twenty Eight

SKA Dar Mora 2–1 FC Dynamo Barlo
Dynamo Jestana 4–2 Hesevan SK
CSKA Haska 2–2 Lokomotiv Astara
Arsenal Diro 1–0 Parika United


  Ashkam Top League     Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 CSKA Haska 28 17 8 3 61 38 +23 59
2 Dynamo Jestana 28 11 15 2 50 34 +16 48
3 Arsenal Diro 28 12 7 9 42 38 +4 43
4 Hesevan SK 28 9 6 13 31 37 −6 33
5 SKA Dar Mora 28 7 10 11 18 22 −4 31
6 Parika United 28 7 8 13 41 50 −9 29
7 FC Dynamo Barlo 28 7 8 13 35 45 −10 29
8 Lokomotiv Astara 28 6 10 12 44 58 −14 28

U-21 Top League Pld W D L GF GA GD Pts
1 Hesevan National Academy 27 19 6 2 60 32 +28 63
2 Jestana National Academy 27 16 7 4 60 37 +23 55
3 Barlo National Academy 27 13 6 8 54 39 +15 45
4 Astara National Academy 27 12 6 9 62 51 +11 42
5 Haska National Academy 27 9 8 10 44 47 −3 35
6 Pumo National Academy 27 8 7 12 39 48 −9 31
7 Diro National Academy 27 7 6 14 45 61 −16 27
8 Bahar National Academy 27 7 5 15 44 59 −15 26
9 Parika National Academy 27 7 5 15 29 46 −17 26
10 Dar Mora National Academy 27 4 10 13 17 34 −17 22

YOUTH; STAR FIVE
CB; Arjan Bayaj; 19; Dar Mora National Academy
ST; Badi Shah; 21; Bahar National Academy
DM; Perry Joensu; 18; Diro National Academy
GK; Erik Alto; 20; Jestana National Academy
RB; Rin Gadolin; 21; Haska National Academy


CSKA Haska are Ashkam’s finest for the first time, after becoming the first southern club to win the Ashkam Top League title. They were in the lead for the entire season after being picked to finish in third or fourth place by almost all members of the media, and they finished the season with seventeen wins, eight draws, and only three losses. Their main title rivals were Dynamo Jestana, but Dynamo didn’t look like true rivals and finished with only 48 points compared to 59 from the army team.They were awarded the trophy after their 2-2 draw on the final matchday, at home against Lokomotiv Astara.

If anyone benefits from this, it’s manager Bryan Hatala, who guided Haska into becoming title challengers after shaping their squad and introducing crucial players Corey Hariri, Saki Felles, and Evgeni Hasakhan to the starting lineup. During Hatala’s first of three years as manager, Felles signed with the club after being released from the youth team of Parika United, which could have desperately used her talents this season now that the player has developed further. The addition was supported by Hariri being promoted from the CSKA youth club, and Dan Ransom was pulled by Hatala from the CSKA kickboxing team after previously retiring from football when his youth career ended. Every one of these additions panned out, and now, that group of players managed to lead Haska to something that they had never achieved in their history.

The viral picture going around, which would eventually feature on the front cover of the newspapers across the country, shows Evgeni Hasakhan and Saki Felles smoking cigars and holding champagne bottles while sitting next to the trophy in the locker room, wearing tee shirts reading “ARMY SPORTING CLUB - CHAMPIONS OF ASHKAM.” In a way, it’s a very fitting one, as they could be called the two players that led the turnaround in the attack and the defense. Hasakhan was brilliant creatively and made Dan Ransom and Shabazz Galinen look like world beaters at times, while Felles flat out erased some of the best wide players in the league with her aggression and footwork. This is the first time CSKA Haska will pose with the trophy, with both the modern club and their predecessors suffering from poor luck despite being consistently good over the years.

Bryan Hatala’s stock has raised enough that just about every club in the country would like to sign him as manager, except for the Dynamo Jestana team that dominated before his rise to prominence. There’s been talk of Lokomotiv Astara bringing him on board to help in their process of rebuilding after their shameful display this season, but after taking Haska to the top, Hatala has shown interest in staying: “I know all the northern clubs want me right now, but there’s no place that I’d rather work than the Army. I’d also like to stay in the south, my family is here, and I consider the players here to be my extended family. We slayed every other team we faced this season, so why would I leave? What can someone else offer me that we don’t have here? I’m a servant of the Army. I’m not in this game to make money, and I wouldn’t trade in my family here for it. Not now or ever.”

The team’s reception as champions has been nothing short of great. Much of the skyline was lit up in purple in downtown Haska, and city officials have already planned a parade from the central military base to the downtown area. It’s unknown how long the team will stay together, with the league being realigned every so often and players being shuffled around by the government for balancing purposes. There’s leaks linking Dan Ransom with Dynamo Jestana and Saki Felles with Hesevan SK, but both players have denied the leaks and said that they haven’t been informed by the league about next season’s rosters.

“My commitment with the army is almost over, yes, but this is my home and I don’t want to go anywhere,” said Ransom, speaking to media members on the day after the final game. “Saki’s commitment won’t be up for a couple of more years, I don’t think she’s leaving either. None of us want to leave, regardless of the chances elsewhere to be the main star on a team that’s down on luck… This is our home. We don’t want to give it up.”
Last edited by Ashkam on Sun Apr 22, 2018 4:23 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Postby Renzhen » Mon Apr 23, 2018 4:10 pm

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Renzhen is an island city state that is known for its bustling urban area, dense population of one million people, and growing services industry. The city has a history dating back to the 1600s and is located in southeastern Rushmore, to the north of Ashkam. Ashkam and Renzhen have a history of trading and interacting, and in the 1960s following the rise of communism in Ashkam, the former invaded the latter and established a protectorate government. The money earned from Renzhenese business activities is taxed and goes back to the Ashkamite regime, making the entire island a large cash cow for the communist government, while the island still keeps de facto independence and controls its own economics and affairs.

The CityLeague was founded in 2002 to bring semi professional football to Renzhen, and to this day the league is made up of a combination of pro and amateur players. Ashkam International is owned by the Ashmaite government and is the best funded team in the country, while Gold City United is the locally owned one and the best supported. Both International and United play in the same stadium, which only seats 17,000. With the nation of Ashkam making more effort to connect to the outside world the winner of the league will enter international competition in Rushmore for the first time. And that club will be Ashkam International, after the club’s twelve wins lifted them to gold in the CityLeague once again after twenty matches played.

 CityLeague               Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 Ashkam International 20 12 6 2 55 37 +18 42
2 CSKA Renzhen 20 9 5 6 35 29 +6 32
3 Golden City United 20 8 3 9 41 42 −1 27
4 Ashkam Telecom FC 20 7 4 9 45 47 −2 25
5 Air Ashkam SC 20 6 6 8 40 39 +1 24
6 Renzhen Bay Sharks 20 4 4 12 24 46 −22 16
Island city state under the protection of Ashkam

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Postby Ashkam » Wed Apr 25, 2018 3:05 pm

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ASHKAM UPSETS NUMBER FIVE EURA 3-2 ON THE ROAD TO OPEN CYCLE

EURA --- Ashkam’s heroes are victorious after one game, pulling off a legendary upset over the fifth ranked team in the World Cup standings. Perhaps the Football Federation of Ashkam was correct when officials claimed that the nation was being underestimated, as it entered the tournament with a lack of a rank and was picked by some foreign media outlets as one of the most unknown and/or worst teams in the qualifying cycle. The match was broadcast in public squares across Ashkamite cities, most notably in the capital, where Honorable Chairman Rada Tanai engaged in a pre match pep rally with the city’s citizens and burnt a giant wooden pig with the Euran flag painted on the side.

This, of course, is because Eura is an enemy capitalist nation and one of the largest ones in the world, with more than two billion people living under its oppressive economic and political system. Chants of “Eura Warmonger” could also be heard at both the rally and at the upper decks of the stadium, where the Ashkamite government funded a trip for 750 members of the Crimson Army to travel to Eura and cheer on the team. The players were motivated heavily by the support and showed it in their performance, as they took the match to the capitalists and showed no fear towards the higher ranked nation.

The Hammerers were off to a flying start when Corey Hariri beat the offside line in the third minute and was fed a pass over the top from Michael Ledes, which he chipped behind keeper Robert Griffin after a single touch. As it turned out, the precision and skill taught by the communist football schools came in handy for Hariri, who finished calmly and celebrated by bowing down in the direction of the Haskari mountain range, the birthplace of Eternal Leader Rusen Tanai and Honorable Chairman Rada Tanai.

Wise manager Dren Husali did not order the Hammerers to sit back after scoring, however. The Ashkamite team only picked up the pace after the goal and kept the capitalists on the back foot, allowing strikers Corey Hariri and Dan Ransom to register four more shots in the next eight minutes. The Euran team struck back aggressively and forced goalkeeper Esa Jah to save two shots from forward Dean Sharp in the last ten minutes of the half. But Jah was a wall for the end of the half, and Ashkam went into the locker rooms up 1-0 despite playing on the road.

Temporary setbacks were suffered at the very start of the second half, when defender Bryan Butler booted the ball downfield and Dean Sharp beat Vae Haley to the header, allowing Sharp to get a free shot on goal and tie the match for the home side. Suddenly, the result was in peril for the Ashkamite team, which learned the effects of showing fear for the first time. The host team pressured Ashkam and prevented the Ashkamite attack from getting off any more shots for the first twenty minutes of the half. Sixty minutes into the match, Lofty Jones whipped the ball into the box for Josh Holmes, who finished the chance after finding himself unmarked due to Timofey Carone tripping and falling.

Eura now led the match 2-1, but Dren Husali revised the team’s game plan and brought on Audrey Kazma and Martin Majala as substitutes. Majala made a quick impact, and in the sixty eighth minute, he completed a one two sequence with Evgeni Hasakhan and placed the ball just next to the post to tie the match for Ashkam. Dren Husali pushed the tempo further for Ashkam and switched to a 3-3-4 formation with Saki Felles and Dan Ransom playing wide while Martin Majala and Armen Farak manned the middle. Farak and Majala generated a number of shots but failed to find the goal, hitting the post once and having multiple attempts saved by Griffin.

Ashkam’s breakthrough came in the seventy sixth minute when Quebec born midfielder Audrey Kazma gained control of the ball at the edge of the box and attempted to volley it to Martin Majala. However, the ball went off of the arm of Ben Hall, causing the referee to signal for a penalty. The fans in the stadium were immediately outraged, and neutral fans watching the match on television began to comment online that Kazma had kicked the ball into Hall’s arm to draw a penalty. Euran players protested to the referee, but the decision was final and Kazma stepped up to take the penalty, to the sound of resounding whistles and jeers around the stadium.

Despite the lack of sportsmanship from Ashkam’s capitalist pig opponents and their fans, Kazma calmly scored the penalty kick and celebrated by running down the sideline and crossing herself, a gesture that will surely be controversial in the mostly atheist Ashkam. Kazma can be forgiven for the gesture because of her foreign birth, however, and will go down as the hero of the match.

Eura went on the attack after the goal from Ashkam and would have one last good chance to get a point from the match. Lofty Jones beat Vae Haley one on one and aimed for the top corner, but an acrobatic parry from Esa Jah knocked the ball back into play, where Timofey Carone cleared the ball deep down the pitch. Eura had one more volley downfield and sent everyone towards the box, but Peter Kahvanen headed the ball clear of danger and the referee blew for the final whistle after three minutes of extra time. The Ashkamite bench ran onto the pitch to the sound of stunned silence from a home crowd not used to losing to low ranked nations at home, and some of the more iconic moments in Ashkamite sports history were captured at that moment.

“It was business as usual for us,” said manager Dren Husali in the post match press conference. “The rest of the world can talk about our political system or our leaders all they want, I’m sure the Euran players were laughing at us for that until they saw what the training from communist football schools did to them. And they can say whatever they want about the penalty decision. They’re the ones that let it get to that point, where Audrey could win the match with a penalty, and the Chairman is getting the last laugh in the end because we have the three points. We’re going to fly back to Ashkam, celebrate, and then it’s back to work.”
Last edited by Ashkam on Wed Apr 25, 2018 3:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Ashkam » Thu Apr 26, 2018 3:33 pm

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ASHKAM FALLS 5-4 AT HOME AGAINST SLIGHT FAVORITES KOSOVAKIA

JESTANA --- Ashkam returned home after their shocking upset over Eura, but didn’t have the same fates while taking on 128th ranked Koskovakia. Despite the opposition initially roaring ahead to a 3-0 lead in the first half, Ashkam’s comeback came short and the Kosovakian team’s two goals in the second half sealed the deal and ensured that they came away from Rusen Tanai Stadium with all three of the points that were up for grabs. It wasn’t because the fans weren’t into the match. The first home match for the national team was sold out and the north stand was filled with members of the Crimson Army, the state sponsored support organization. The fans unfurled a banner praising communism ahead of the match, but their support couldn’t push the players far enough to find an equalizer at the end of the second half.

Ashkam’s first goal was at the end of the first half, when Evgeni Hasakhan played a through ball to Corey Hariri, who finished from a tough angle to the side of the post. Hariri was the best player on the pitch for Ashkam and was involved with three of their four goals, as he scored the second one in the 58th minute after completing a passing sequence with winger Dan Ransom. Ashkam made the scoreline 3-2 and looked competitive again, but Kosovakia took the momentum out of the air when they scored on a direct free kick not much long after. When Ashkam pressed forward to attack more and get another goal, it resulted in Kosovakia hitting on the counter attack and making the scoreline 5-2 in their favor.

In the later part of the match, Dren Husali’s men had one last push in them. Timofey Carone whipped a ball into the box and after it was headed into the air, Armen Farak predicted the landing location and put the ball into the back of the net unmarked. That goal came in the 71st minute, and Ashkam struck again in the 80th when Corey Hariri placed the ball slightly behind himself for Dan Ransom, who skipped around the center back and finished from close range. However, the last attack would fail as Corey Hariri’s header went wide of the goal and the referee blew the whistle to end the match shortly after. “I should have finished by all means but it looks like I had a bit of luck this match, and things evened out at the worst possible time,” Hariri told reporters afterwards.

Dren Husali also spoke to press. “We know what we need to fix up in future matches. We showed holes in our defense and our wide players looked sluggish, our central defenders didn’t win every header that they should have won either. We’ll work on it in training before our next match and doing good against Eura blinded some of our players about those things that we need to work on. Well, we’ll do our best to make sure we don’t carry that ignorance of our weak spots into the next match.”
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Postby Ashkam » Fri Apr 27, 2018 8:01 pm

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RED CARD CAUSES ASHKAM COLLAPSE IN APOX, NATIONAL TEAM LOSES 5-4 AGAIN

APOX --- The Ashkamite national team is left stunned and confused after blowing its chance to get a second major upset in three matches. The team has played better on the road than at home so far and once again took the match to a stronger team. In this case, the favorite was 35th ranked Apox, but the team has more of a tradition behind it than an ordinary team ranked in the 30-40 range. Additionally, Apox is the second highest rated team in the group. According to most betting lines, they should have defeated the Hammerers by three or four goals, with their home crowd boosting them to a better performance. In reality, things were far closer.

Corey Hariri has remained in form and contributed another brace, scoring one goal in each half. Dan Ransom and Evgeni Hasakhan added to the scoresheet for Ashkam to contribute a total of four goals, and despite the sluggish back four, it was enough to tie the match with Apox going into the 73rd minute. That was after Ashkam had settled into a defensive posture to contain the opposition attack until the end of the match, with the goal of getting away with a point instead of going all out for a victory, but the 73rd minute was when things changed and the Hammerers lost the match in a way, even when they didn’t concede just yet.

Peter Kahvanen was sent off in that minute after making a bizarrely rough tackle that had no chance of passing the referee without being called. The lapse in focus was reflective of the defensive struggles of the last Ashkamite match, despite the team making it a public goal to improve the defending this match. Once they were down to ten men, the Ashkamite team seemed confused and struggled with positioning and one versus one battles. Several shots were cleared in the late part of the match but it only took one to get the win in the 80th minute, after Esa Jah failed to reach the ball before the opposing striker’s long shot went in just next to the post.

SKA Dar Mora striker Jai Talakesi made his debut while substituting for Corey Hariri, but failed to find the equalizer and had two shots saved in stoppage time. The match ended with Ashkam wondering where their chance at taking a point had went, after one break in concentration changed the story of the entire match and changed the outcome on the final scoreline. “It was a fucking disgrace, that’s what the end of this match was,” said manager Dren Husali, after the match was over. “We had a chance for three points and after that we had a chance for one point. We were able to hang with one of the best national teams in the world. And we blew it. What else is there to say about this? We have a lot of tape to look at before our next matches, so we’ll look at the defensive problems from here and from the Kosovakia match and see if we can find something to turn things around. But there’s no magical fixes at the highest level and it’s not looking great right now.”
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Postby Ashkam » Sat Apr 28, 2018 10:03 pm

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RANSOM LEADS ASHKAM TO SECOND WIN, DEFEATS COMPETITIVE SOLITAIRE 1-0


JESTANA --- Ashkam scored their second victory of the World Cup cycle when the team hosted Competitive Solitaire, a team in dire straits. The win made sure that Competitive Solitaire was the worst team in the group, but the Ashkamite team couldn’t afford to spare their opponents. Ashkam is still a dark horse in the race to qualify, after their 2-0-2 start that saw them lose two matches before this one by a total of only one goal each, after upsetting fifth ranked Eura in their opener. Ashkamite fans have been tortured by their team’s bad defense in both losses, but the team’s focus and film study finally came through as they shut out Competitive Solitaire.

Goalkeeper Esa Jah had a good day and saved potential goals by Filipp Strobel on two occasions in the second half. The Jestana crowd was eager for their team to make a breakthrough, and while it didn’t come immediately, Competitive Solitaire couldn’t keep the match deadlocked forever. After a 0-0 first half, Dan Ransom broke through with the winner in the 61st minute, after Arik Nordale tackled Wolfram Kappel and fired the ball down the pitch shortly after winning it. Ransom faced two defenders and cut away from the goal before cutting back inside, shaking off Leo Sokolov and giving him a clear path to make a run on the goal.

Ransom finished his chance and the Ashkamite defense stood strong through the rest of the match, only allowing a few shots, all of which were saved by Esa Jah. Dren Husali, manager of the Ashkamite national team, was not too confident based on this result, however. “We thought things were going well after our first win and look what happened in the two matches after that. It’s a bit early in the cycle to celebrate, because we don’t think of ourselves like an ordinary unranked team. We can take a lot of points from the teams above us, so we aren’t going to celebrate until it’s later in the cycle and we’ve done that. For now, we did what we were supposed to do, we handled a minnow that’s at the bottom of the group. Not an accomplishment. Come to us when we take points from a team that’s supposed to beat us, and then congratulate us.”
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Postby Ashkam » Mon Apr 30, 2018 1:10 pm

(OOC: Note that this article is from an Ashkamite protectorate city state, away from the mainland. It's why the article can criticize the government.)

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CONTROVERSY STRIKES ASHKAM COLLEGE SPORTS AS GOVERNMENT STRIPS & EJECTS GRAND RIVER UNIVERSITY


GRAND RIVER --- Controversy surrounds Ashkamite college football as the Big North Conference announced the departure of defending champions, Grand River University. The team had a dominant season and won eleven games in the toughest conference in the country, claiming a national championship that went uncontested with pollsters. That is, until new legislature was passed by the Ashkamite Football Commission barring Grand River from claiming the national championship, allowing their interconference rivals from the Central Academy of the Army to claim their own national title following their 12-2 season. Again, the title was claimed undisputedly, but many believe that Grand River, not Army, rightfully won.

Reportedly, the title was stripped because of Grand River’s refusal to praise Honorable Chairman Rusen Tanai throughout this season. As if the scenario couldn’t get stranger, the Big North Conference recently announced the departure of Grand River, who has more conference titles than every other school in the conference combined. Reports from within Ashkam believe this to be a case of the government forcing the team out and attempting to shut their program down after their refusal to praise the Chairman. Others believe that it’s a case of nepotism towards Army, which did not enjoy its usual advantage with the pollsters this year. Whatever the case, Army now has a title that few people believe they earned, and the Big North loses its most powerful program.



Grand River fans, of course, are quick to remind everyone that two of Army’s wins were against an 0-14 team, while every team in the Big North won four or more games. Take away of those wins against a horrible Pumo State team, one that had trouble even scraping together the funding to send out a team this year, and they have the same 11-3 record that the Grand River Bearcats did. If the point differentials were adjusted to exclude garbage time in blowout games, the Bearcats would also have the better differential. Every metric points to them being the better team, and yet they were still punished by the communist government and are now looking for a new home before next season, one that can take them in without destroying its existing ecosystem by introducing a team that’s too strong for its opposition.

One week after the school’s title was stripped, and after their untimely expulsion from the conference, they released a video cryptically hinting at “Season 19”, showing highlights from the most recent year and flashing the hint about Season 19 at the end of the video, after showing the football team’s logo and the logo of the team’s outfitter, Kommunist Fashion. The peculiar thing is that the upcoming season wouldn’t be the Bearcats’ nineteenth, as they have more seasons than that. Fan theories are already going around about what the meaning of the video is. We have it saved above, in case it gets taken down by the mainland Ashkamite government. Why not have a look for yourself, and comment on what you think the meaning is?

  Big North Conference                      Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD   Pts 
1 Grand River University 14 11 3 219 164 +55 33
2 Central Academy of the Air Force 14 9 5 253 149 +104 27
3 Astara State University 14 9 5 223 152 +71 27
4 Dar Mora State University 14 7 7 259 251 +8 21
5 Diro Industrial Academy 14 6 8 194 190 +4 18
6 Jestana A&M 14 6 8 220 309 −89 18
7 Jestana Mechanical Institute 14 4 10 174 223 −49 12
8 Bahar Farming School 14 4 10 147 251 −104 12
  Agriculture 8 Conference                  Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD   Pts 
1 Central Academy of the Army 14 12 2 143 68 +75 36
2 Hesevan Minining University 14 10 4 279 191 +88 30
3 Jestana Institute of Communist Theory 14 9 5 255 234 +21 27
4 Astara Institute of Science 14 8 6 246 207 +39 24
5 Haskaria University 14 7 7 265 208 +57 21
6 Barlo Technical College 14 7 7 225 203 +22 21
7 Hesevan Communist School 14 3 11 174 255 −81 9
8 Pumo State University 14 0 14 108 329 −221 0
dєmσcrαtíc pєσplє's rєpuвlíc σf αshkαm
bojikstan reloaded

"It's actually not democratic, a republic, or built by the people." - on the DPRA


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