Issue: The papers are abuzz after it came to light that your Minister of Finance, Chris Cash, used his insider knowledge that the government planned to invest in a local sweet manufacture, Sweetheart Deal, to buy shares in that company at a low price before the investment, with the share value going up 400% percent since the investment. Tensions are high as you must now handle this latest scandal.
Validity: Must be a Democracy, private industry must be legal
option: “Cash out!” bellows Opposition Leader @@RANDOMNAME@@, going characteristically red in the face with anger. “I demand that Cash pay the price. He must be fired at once and face trial for corruption. While we are about it, I insist the replacement Finance Minister require bipartisan support to be appointed.”
effect: Finance Ministers rarely last more than a week before being fired on suspicion of corruption
option: “This is all a filthy smear” insists a blubbering Cash, crying in your office while dabbing his eyes with banknotes. “I can’t help it that my good financial sense told me to invest in Sweetheart Deal. If anything I should be getting praised for showing good financial judgement! I’m sure if you investigate the opposition you’ll find that they are using the exact same insider knowledge to line their own pockets”.
effect: “I know you are but what am I?” is now considered a valid legal defence against corruption allegations
option: “Do we even need a Finance Minister?” yawns noted billionaire heiress @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@, sipping a cocktail while being fanned by a muscular servant in a loincloth. “It seems to me that the free market works just fine without the government coming along and messing things up”. Handing you her drink she says “now be a dear and get me some more ice”.
effect: the invisible hand of the market is now the Minister of Finance
option: “You’re missing the real issue here!” declares avid Communist @@RANDOMNAME@@, while trying burn your copy of the popular board game “Plutocracy”. “The real issue is that capitalism is corrupting by its very nature! Nationalise all industry and place it firmly under the control of the proletariat vanguard of the revolution! With the workers in control the means of production, corruption will surely disappear, right?”
effect: sales on red berets hit an all time high just before the retail industry was nationalised
