[ABANDONED] Getting the Royal Treatment for Free

[Frieden-und Freudenland]

Do you know Prince Stefan Cernetic of Montenegro and Macedonia? If you don't, that's OK, because he doesn't exist. Well, I mean, he exists, but he is not real. Confused? Good.

It turns out you can simply pretend to be the prince of a tiny Balkan nation in order to be treated like a prince in foreign countries, and you can even have the bills of your expenses sent to the foreign ministry of the country you claim to be a prince of. It's the funniest scam I've heard of recently. I don't find the scam funny by itself, but the fact that people actually fell for it is interesting. Then I thought: "why not write an issue draft on this?"

(for the news article, see: http://www.newsweek.com/man-faked-being ... son-626006)

Draft 2

[description]Your Ministry of Foreign Affairs has been sent an envelope containing diverse trade agreements of dubious contribution to @@NAME@@'s commercial interests, sealed between @@NAME@@ and Smalltopia. Upon closer inspection it turned out that the documents all bore the seal and insignia of a so-called His Royal Highness Prince Harvey of @@CAPITAL@@. Police investigations revealed that @@RANDOMNAMEMALE@@ Warbeck, a @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ diplomat, introduced himself as the crown prince of @@NAME@@ in Smalltopia and was treated like a royal by the Smalltopian officials. As if that was not enough, he had the audacity to sign internationally binding contracts on your behalf.

[validity]not a monarchy

1. [option]"I don't care if he was a scammer or not!" yells @@RANDOMNAME@@, the Smalltopian ambassador, unfurling a scroll of paper which @@HE@@ claims to be the list of expenses they made for the prince. "He was your diplomat, so all the deals he signed while he was on a mission here, must be recognized as valid. If not, I'd like to remind you that we have spent thousands of @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ on his extravagant wishes, so we'd like to be reimbursed for that."
[effect]@@NAME@@ has to pay a special annual "Royal Tax" to Smalltopia

2. [option]"There is no way we'll agree to these stupid contracts or pay for this scoundrel!" cries @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Finance, fumbling in @@HIS@@ pockets for change and finally pulling out @@HIS@@ empty pockets with a theatrical show of despair. "You see, Smalltopia is trying to put us between a rock and a hard place, but I won't let that happen. I suggest we immediately arrest all the Smalltopian expats here and demand a heavy ransom for their release. Warbeck's bill and the trade agreements in exchange for the ransom. I think THAT is a fair deal."
[effect]expats in @@NAME@@ live in perpetual fear of becoming a token of revenge in an international conflict

3. [option]"It's no surprise that Smalltopians fell for this scam," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, the leader of the main opposition party, with a contemptuous sneer. "It is a miracle that you are still our leader despite your obvious incompetence. So our Smalltopian friends must have thought that you are a monarch, holding on to your throne merely by birthright. I can't blame them. There may be a solution to this, however. How about passing a legislation that rules that the leader of the opposition party be appointed as the deputy of @@NAME@@'s leader? This would prevent the power from being condensed in one party and would also clearly show that we are not a monarchy."
[effect]@@LEADER@@'s statements are often contradicted by the deputy within seconds

[description]You come to your office one morning and find a mysterious envelope on your desk. You open it and see that it contains a 1 million @@CURRENCY@@ invoice, issued in the name of a so-called His Royal Highness Prince Harvey of @@CAPITAL@@ who made wild expenses in Bigtopia and then vanished into thin air. Infuriated, you call your advisors to explain the matter.

[validity]must be a democracy

1. [option]"You've got every right to be angry," snaps @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Interior Minister, pacing in your office up and down. "It seems this guy made a very expensive vacation in a Bigtopian resort and had the bill sent to us, claiming he was our crown prince. We should capture this scoundrel and send him to a labor camp until he can pay off his debts - but alas, he is nowhere to be found! Our police force is severely underfunded, and we have no time to chase this impostor. If you give us a fund increase and extensive search warrants, however, we can find him in no time!"
[effect]special squads of the @@CAPITAL@@ Police Department are looking for people wearing regalia

2. [option]"We can't wait for your cops to find Prince Harvey or whatever is his name to be paid. You should pay us now! When you find the guy, you can ask him for reimbursement." states @@RANDOMNAME@@, the accountant of The Paradise Inn Luxury Resort and SPA, taking a huge scroll of paper out of @@HIS@@ briefcase and reading the fraudster's expense details. "Let's see what we've got here: caviar and champagne for breakfast, private yacht tour on Lake Diamond, personal photo shooting session with the TV star @@RANDOMFIRSTNAMEFEMALE@@ Golddigger,..." You leave the room as @@HE@@ continues to read the list.
[effect]Bigtopian hospitality workers often wonder how many @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ royals check in to their hotels every day

3. [option]"It's no surprise that Bigtopians fell for this scam," yells @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Propaganda, gesticulating wildly. "Our nation is easily mistaken for a monarchy, because, well, we are not that famous, are we? Nobody knows about us, they can't even find us on a map of @@REGION@@, for Violet's sake! What we should do is to kick off a big advertisement campaign, introducing ourselves to the world and loudly proclaiming that we are a democracy and are not being ruled by monarchs! Plus, this advertisement campaign can also boost our tourism income."
[effect]TV ads praise @@NAME@@ as the paragon of democracy every 5 minutes

4. [option]"Wait, does that mean I am not a dame?" asks Ms. Golddigger ruefully, tears filling her eyes. "Prince Harvey, he - he had conferred damehood upon me when we met for the photo shoot session. He even gave me an official certificate and this badge of honor. I can't lose this distinction! @@LEADER@@, you should pardon Prince Harvey and declare that the honors and distinctions he has lavished on me and others will be officially recognized. Please!"
[effect]half the population of @@NAME@@ claim to be dames and knights based on forged documents

Many thanks for comments and suggestions!

[Candlewhisper Archive]

[description]You come to your office one morning and find a mysterious envelope on your desk.

This reads like a "Choose Your Own Adventure" book, rather than an NS issue. A little bit of GMing the player is reasonable, and done artfully (vide #597) it can be a boon to an issue. However, in an issue of this nature it's probably better to go with a more conventional approach.

You open it and see that it contains a 1 million @@CURRENCY@@ invoice, issued in the name of a so-called His Royal Highness Prince Harvey of @@CAPITAL@@ who made wild expenses in Bigtopia and then vanished into thin air. Infuriated, you call your advisors to explain the matter.

[validity]must be a democracy

Not sure on that validity. "Must not be a monarchy" seems more sensible.

1. [option]"You've got every right to be angry," snaps @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Interior Minister, pacing in your office up and down. "It seems this guy made a very expensive vacation in a Bigtopian resort and had the bill sent to us, claiming he was our crown prince. We should capture this scoundrel and send him to a labor camp until he can pay off his debts - but alas, he is nowhere to be found! Our police force is severely underfunded, and we have no time to chase this impostor. If you give us a fund increase and extensive search warrants, however, we can find him in no time!"

If you're going to say "snaps" then have the spoken words sound like the speaker is snapping.

The last 2 parts Are too much of an attempt to parse the option in game stat terms, and they're assumptive as well. Would they make sense in a nation that has high taxation and 80% of its government budget in the police?

[effect]special squads of the @@CAPITAL@@ Police Department are looking for people wearing regalia

A bit on the nose there. Also, regalia is almost always the regalia of something, rather than a noun used in isolation.

2. [option]"We can't wait for your cops to find Prince Harvey or whatever is his name to be paid. You should pay us now! When you find the guy, you can ask him for reimbursement." states @@RANDOMNAME@@, the accountant of The Paradise Inn Luxury Resort and SPA, taking a huge scroll of paper out of @@HIS@@ briefcase and reading the fraudster's expense details. "Let's see what we've got here: caviar and champagne for breakfast, private yacht tour on Lake Diamond, personal photo shooting session with the TV star @@RANDOMFIRSTNAMEFEMALE@@ Golddigger,..." You leave the room as @@HE@@ continues to read the list.
[effect]Bigtopian hospitality workers often wonder how many @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ royals check in to their hotels every day

Why on earth would anyone consider this an option?

3. [option]"It's no surprise that Bigtopians fell for this scam," yells @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Propaganda, gesticulating wildly. "Our nation is easily mistaken for a monarchy, because, well, we are not that famous, are we? Nobody knows about us, they can't even find us on a map of @@REGION@@, for Violet's sake! What we should do is to kick off a big advertisement campaign, introducing ourselves to the world and loudly proclaiming that we are a democracy and are not being ruled by monarchs! Plus, this advertisement campaign can also boost our tourism income."
[effect]TV ads praise @@NAME@@ as the paragon of democracy every 5 minutes

Not being known would be an odd assumption for a nation of billions.

4. [option]"Wait, does that mean I am not a dame?" asks Ms. Golddigger ruefully, tears filling her eyes. "Prince Harvey, he - he had conferred damehood upon me when we met for the photo shoot session. He even gave me an official certificate and this badge of honor. I can't lose this distinction! @@LEADER@@, you should pardon Prince Harvey and declare that the honors and distinctions he has lavished on me and others will be officially recognized. Please!"
[effect]half the population of @@NAME@@ claim to be dames and knights based on forged documents

Crazy last option, so we'll allow that this is a stupid approach. But try and make the speaker persuasive.

[Australian rePublic]

Just because you're a democracy doesn't mean that you're not a monarchy. Take the UK for example. I think the word you were looking for is "Republic". In Greek, the word "democratia" means both republic and democracy, does Turkish also have the same for democracy and republic?

Also, your effect for option 4, you can claim whatever you want on a fraudulent document. You need to state that they are legitimised

[Trotterdam]

I think the word you were looking for is "Republic". In Greek, the word "democratia" means both republic and democracy, does Turkish also have the same for democracy and republic?

"Democracy" is composed of Greek "demos" (people) and "kratos" (rule).

"Republic" is composed of Latin "res" (state) and "publica" (of the people).

Yes, this means that "democratic people's republic" literally translates as "people-ruled people's state of the people".

It also means that the US political parties are really sillily named.

[Australian rePublic]

I think the word you were looking for is "Republic". In Greek, the word "democratia" means both republic and democracy, does Turkish also have the same for democracy and republic?

"Democracy" is composed of Greek "demos" (people) and "kratos" (rule).

"Republic" is composed of Latin "res" (state) and "publica" (of the people).

Yes, this means that "democratic people's republic" literally translates as "people-ruled people's state of the people".

It also means that the US political parties are really sillily named.

Interesting

[Candlewhisper Archive]

In game terms, monarchy is a separately tracked flag. "Not a monarchy" is a workable validity.

[Victores]

Surely you mean SFR Macedonia and Monetegro?!

Yeah, I feel the one assuming your nation is small is a little too assuming.

[Australian rePublic]

Side note here: prince Stefan of Macedonia and Montenegro? Why would a prince have two countries?

[Frieden-und Freudenland]

Side note here: prince Stefan of Macedonia and Montenegro? Why would a prince have two countries?

I think he fooled the sort of people who would believe that Macedonia and Montenegro was one single country, like Bosnia and Herzegowina.

[Trotterdam]

In game terms, monarchy is a separately tracked flag.

Which is ignored by actual monarchies.

[Frieden-und Freudenland]

I posted a second draft with a different premise, but I am not sure about it

What do you folks think about it? Can this issue draft be salvaged?

[Frieden-und Freudenland]

Tumbleweed rolling...

Geez, is it THAT bad?

[Zaluzianskya]

You changed Bigtopia to Smalltopia in the second draft, but option 3 still refers to Bigtopia.

[Frieden-und Freudenland]

You changed Bigtopia to Smalltopia in the second draft, but option 3 still refers to Bigtopia.

Fixed that, thank you

Also, in case anyone is wondering, I changed Bigtopia to Smalltopia, because - starting out from the assumption that Bigtopia is a big country and Smalltopia is a small country, which may or may not be warranted, I thought Smalltopia would be a better stage for such an event to take place. Perhaps they would be more likely to be relatively isolated and therefore oblivious to some political facts (@@NAME@@ is not a monarchy). It doesn't always hold, of course, but Smalltopia seemed to make more sense than Bigtopia.

Also, they make a big fuss about the money they spent for the prince, and if it affects them so much, it is possible that they are a small country with a weak economy. (Again, there are small countries with very strong economies and vice versa, but I am making an assumption that may seem to be intuitively correct to the readers).

[Australian rePublic]

Side note here: prince Stefan of Macedonia and Montenegro? Why would a prince have two countries?

I think he fooled the sort of people who would believe that Macedonia and Montenegro was one single country, like Bosnia and Herzegowina.

I see

[Victores]

Side note here: prince Stefan of Macedonia and Montenegro? Why would a prince have two countries?

I think he fooled the sort of people who would believe that Macedonia and Montenegro was one single country, like Bosnia and Herzegowina.

Its Bosnia and Herzegovina not HerzegoWina. Bosnia and Herzegovina is one country. The other country is the Republic Srpska.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

[description]Your Ministry of Foreign Affairs has been sent an envelope containing diverse trade agreements of dubious contribution to @@NAME@@'s commercial interests, sealed between @@NAME@@ and Smalltopia. Upon closer inspection it turned out that the documents all bore the seal and insignia of a so-called His Royal Highness Prince Harvey of @@CAPITAL@@. Police investigations revealed that @@RANDOMNAMEMALE@@ Warbeck, a @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ diplomat, introduced himself as the crown prince of @@NAME@@ in Smalltopia and was treated like a royal by the Smalltopian officials. As if that was not enough, he had the audacity to sign internationally binding contracts on your behalf.

But wordy. Can you half it in length? Also, I'd suggest focusing it on this lone actor working without your permission rather the trade agreements being dubious.

1. [option]"I don't care if he was a scammer or not!" yells @@RANDOMNAME@@, the Smalltopian ambassador, unfurling a scroll of paper which @@HE@@ claims to be the list of expenses they made for the prince. "He was your diplomat, so all the deals he signed while he was on a mission here, must be recognized as valid. If not, I'd like to remind you that we have spent thousands of @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ on his extravagant wishes, so we'd like to be reimbursed for that."
[effect]@@NAME@@ has to pay a special annual "Royal Tax" to Smalltopia

Bad option, no-one would ever pick this.

Instead, I'd suggest having the Smalltopian ambassador concede that these negotiations were done without your knowledge, but that they're actually a really good deal for both nations, so why not just ratify them?

2. [option]"There is no way we'll agree to these stupid contracts or pay for this scoundrel!" cries @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Finance, fumbling in @@HIS@@ pockets for change and finally pulling out @@HIS@@ empty pockets with a theatrical show of despair. "You see, Smalltopia is trying to put us between a rock and a hard place, but I won't let that happen. I suggest we immediately arrest all the Smalltopian expats here and demand a heavy ransom for their release. Warbeck's bill and the trade agreements in exchange for the ransom. I think THAT is a fair deal."
[effect]expats in @@NAME@@ live in perpetual fear of becoming a token of revenge in an international conflict

Even worse option. Why would we arrest Smalltopians unless we're trying to be crazy authoritarian?

Try and have the majority of your options be reasonable to normal-type nations of various political leanings, and then add one crazy option on that. An issue that is ALL crazy options just gets dismissed.

Have your option 2 be a reasonable tearing up of the deal, and police forces being funded to track down and arrest the fraud.

3. [option]"It's no surprise that Smalltopians fell for this scam," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, the leader of the main opposition party, with a contemptuous sneer. "It is a miracle that you are still our leader despite your obvious incompetence. So our Smalltopian friends must have thought that you are a monarch, holding on to your throne merely by birthright. I can't blame them. There may be a solution to this, however. How about passing a legislation that rules that the leader of the opposition party be appointed as the deputy of @@NAME@@'s leader? This would prevent the power from being condensed in one party and would also clearly show that we are not a monarchy."
[effect]@@LEADER@@'s statements are often contradicted by the deputy within seconds

Completely off topic and out of left field. Not a good option, I think.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Tumbleweed rolling...

Geez, is it THAT bad?

Um... yes it is. I was maintaining a diplomatic silence, but as you're pushing for a response, here goes...

[description]Your Ministry of Foreign Affairs has been sent an envelope containing diverse trade agreements of dubious contribution to @@NAME@@'s commercial interests, sealed between @@NAME@@ and Smalltopia. Upon closer inspection it turned out that the documents all bore the seal and insignia of a so-called His Royal Highness Prince Harvey of @@CAPITAL@@. Police investigations revealed that @@RANDOMNAMEMALE@@ Warbeck, a @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ diplomat, introduced himself as the crown prince of @@NAME@@ in Smalltopia and was treated like a royal by the Smalltopian officials. As if that was not enough, he had the audacity to sign internationally binding contracts on your behalf.

It's a decent premise but too wordy. Can you halve it in length? Also, I'd suggest focusing it on this lone actor working without your permission rather the trade agreements being dubious.

1. [option]"I don't care if he was a scammer or not!" yells @@RANDOMNAME@@, the Smalltopian ambassador, unfurling a scroll of paper which @@HE@@ claims to be the list of expenses they made for the prince. "He was your diplomat, so all the deals he signed while he was on a mission here, must be recognized as valid. If not, I'd like to remind you that we have spent thousands of @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ on his extravagant wishes, so we'd like to be reimbursed for that."
[effect]@@NAME@@ has to pay a special annual "Royal Tax" to Smalltopia

Bad option, no-one would ever pick this.

Instead, I'd suggest having the Smalltopian ambassador concede that these negotiations were done without your knowledge, but that they're actually a really good deal for both nations, so why not just ratify them?

2. [option]"There is no way we'll agree to these stupid contracts or pay for this scoundrel!" cries @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Finance, fumbling in @@HIS@@ pockets for change and finally pulling out @@HIS@@ empty pockets with a theatrical show of despair. "You see, Smalltopia is trying to put us between a rock and a hard place, but I won't let that happen. I suggest we immediately arrest all the Smalltopian expats here and demand a heavy ransom for their release. Warbeck's bill and the trade agreements in exchange for the ransom. I think THAT is a fair deal."
[effect]expats in @@NAME@@ live in perpetual fear of becoming a token of revenge in an international conflict

Even worse option. Why would we arrest Smalltopians unless we're trying to be crazy authoritarian?

Try and have the majority of your options be reasonable to normal-type nations of various political leanings, and then add one crazy option on that. An issue that is ALL crazy options just gets dismissed.

Have your option 2 be a reasonable tearing up of the deal, and police forces being funded to track down and arrest the fraud.

3. [option]"It's no surprise that Smalltopians fell for this scam," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, the leader of the main opposition party, with a contemptuous sneer. "It is a miracle that you are still our leader despite your obvious incompetence. So our Smalltopian friends must have thought that you are a monarch, holding on to your throne merely by birthright. I can't blame them. There may be a solution to this, however. How about passing a legislation that rules that the leader of the opposition party be appointed as the deputy of @@NAME@@'s leader? This would prevent the power from being condensed in one party and would also clearly show that we are not a monarchy."
[effect]@@LEADER@@'s statements are often contradicted by the deputy within seconds

Completely off topic and out of left field. Not a good option, I think.

[Frieden-und Freudenland]

OK, I dumped this one.

To salvage it, I'd have to make some radical changes, and this would involve giving up on the Prince Scam - and then it would be a completely new issue anyway.

[Leutria]

May I try and salvage this issue? I have a couple ideas on how I might make it workable.

[Frieden-und Freudenland]

May I try and salvage this issue? I have a couple ideas on how I might make it workable.

Mmm, sure why not? We could also collaborate on it if you like?

[Leutria]

Sure! I will telegram you about it either this evening or over the weekend.

[Frieden-und Freudenland]

Sure! I will telegram you about it either this evening or over the weekend.

Alright! It's a deal