[SUBMITTED]In Space, No One Can Hear You Complain

[Drayxaso]

I've wanted to make an issue for a while now (this will be my second attempt), and I've had this idea floating around in my head for about a month or so. There didn't seem to be an issue regarding outer space cooperation, so I figured I'd use that a bit as well. The draft isn't near complete, but I'd appreciate any advice I could get.

Title:
In Space, No One Can Hear You Complain

Description:
In a shocking turn of events, the normally secretive East Lebuckte Space Program proposed working with the @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ Aeronautics and Space Administration to create a jointly-operated space station, called the Multinational Space Station, or MSS. Your advisors have concluded that a space station could provide @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA with valuable scientific data and advance their exploratory efforts, but @@NAME@@ and East Lebuckte have had shaky relations for some time.

Validity:
Valid for all nations with a space program

[option]"Comrade @@LEADER@@, there is no reason not to trust us," comments @@RANDOMNAME@@, the East Lebucktese representative, while discreetly placing a listening device under your office plant. "Our proposal would launch @@NAME@@'s space program to new heights while setting a glorious example of friendship between our two great motherlands. We're ready to launch the 'Spyonya' module, so just hurry up and agree to build the station already."
[effect]The fastest way to @@NAME@@'s secrets is through its space agency
[stats]Scientific Advancement increases significantly, Corruption increases, Taxation increases significantly, Averageness increases

[option]"A jointly-operated space station might be one small step for international cooperation, but a space station of our own would be a giant leap for "@@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@kind," declares @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ astronaut Hum Legstrong, who has arrived wearing a space suit for reasons you cannot fathom. "All we need to do is repurpose some leftover parts from the last few spaceship programs. Fuel tank? Bam, crew quarters! Spy Satellite? Bam, space telescope! We'll get all the sciencey goodness for a low, low price, and we won't have to trust those shady East Lebucktese--or anyone else!"
[effect]@@NAME@@'s new Mylab space station is notorious for being the loneliest place above the Earth.
[stats]Taxation decreases slightly, Scientific Advancement increases slightly,

[option]"Space mall. We need to build a space mall," announces Melon Husk, the hyperactive CEO of private spaceflight company Space@@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@. "Everyone loves space. Everyone loves malls. Think how much profit could be made if we combine the two! Throw some @@CURRENCY@@s in our direction and you'll have space-customers buying space-goods by the end of the space-decade! At least, provided our rocket doesn't explode on the launchpad again."
[effect]Violent explosions are considered key elements in the process of trial and error
[stats]Economy increases, Economic Freedom increases, Safety decreases, Wealth Gaps increase, "Space Shuttle Mishap" added to death causes, Taxation increases
[option validity]Nation must have private industry and have picked options 1 or 3 of #574

[option]"A space station? Really?" remarks @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, an unpopular and pessimistic politician, as he chews on a piece of Suborbit-brand gum. "Those nerds may act satisfied, but they'll just be begging for more funding next week. Take a page from Maxtopia: slash @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA's budget. We might get less of that "science" thing, but who cares? No one, because they'll be too busy enjoying the tax cut."
[effect]@@NAME@@'s space program barely has enough money to pay its electrical bills
[stats]Scientific Advancement decreases significantly, Taxation decreases, Cheerfulness decreases, Freedom from Taxation increases, Government Size decreases, Ignorance increases, Intelligence decreases, Corruption increases, Political Apathy increases, Averageness increases, nation is no longer flagged as having a space program
[option validity]Nation must have private industry

[option]"A space station? Really?" remarks @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, an unpopular and pessimistic politician, as he scratches his nose with a model of @@NAME@@'s first satellite. "Those nerds may act satisfied, but they'll just be begging for more funding next week. Take a page from Maxtopia: slash @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA's budget. We might get less of that "science" thing, but who cares? No one, because they'll be too busy enjoying the tax cut."
[effect]@@NAME@@'s space program barely has enough money to pay its electrical bills
[stats]Scientific Advancement decreases significantly, Taxation decreases, Cheerfulness decreases, Freedom from Taxation increases, Government Size decreases, Ignorance increases, Intelligence decreases, Corruption increases, Political Apathy increases, Averageness increases, nation is no longer flagged as having a space program
[option validity]Nation does not have private industry

Title:
In Space, No-One Can Hear You Complain

Description:
In a shocking turn of events, the normally secretive East Lebuckte Space Program proposed working with the @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ Aeronautics and Space Administration to create a jointly-operated space station, called the Multinational Space Station, or MSS. The move has thrown @@NAME@@ over intense debate over outer-space cooperation, and you've decided it's time to resolve things.

Validity:
Valid for all nations with a space program

[option]"Comrade @@LEADER@@, there is no reason not to trust us," comments @@RANDOMNAME@@, the East Lebuckese representative, while discreetly placing a listening device under your office plant. "Not only would the MSS set a glorious example of friendship between our two great peoples, but it would also be less expensive than if @@NAME@@ were to attempt to create a space station on its own, because the cost would be equally paid for by both of our magnificent motherlands. My nation has even took the liberty of beginning the station by placing the 'Spyonya' module in orbit, so all you need to do is dock something to it!"
[effect]The East Lebuckte Space Program has named its section of the Multinational Space Station the "totally not spying on you" segment
[stats]Scientific Advancement increases significantly, Corruption increases, Taxation increases slightly, Averageness increases

[option]"Don't listen to that evil @@TYPE@@-hating commie!" roars ill-tempered and overly paranoid General @@RANDOMNAME@@ as he slams his hands down on your desk, scattering a large pile of paperwork (which undoubtedly took your secretary quite a while to organize) all over your floor. "Ever since they put that 'Sputnak' satellite in orbit, they've been putting satellites into orbit left and right; they may claim the satellites are just for research, but I'm convinced those evil East Lebucktese are setting up orbital weaponry! The only rational solution is to build our own orbital weapon grid--equipped with the most advanced weaponry @@NAME@@ has access to--and blow any satellite not owned by @@NAME@@ out of the sky! And if anyone tries to launch new satellites, we'll just obliterate their spaceflight facilities (and a couple of their cities). It's a simple solution, really, with no drawbacks other than massive development costs and functionally declaring war on every nation that has ever had a space program."
[effect]The @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Armed Forces seems to have taken the term "shooting star" quite literally
[stats]Defense Forces increase significantly, Pacifism decreases dramatically, Authoritarianism increases, Weaponization increases slightly, Industry: Arms Manufacturing increases dramatically, 'War' added to death causes, 'Atomic Age' banner unlocked
[option validity]Nation must have a military

[option]"A jointly-constructed space station isn't a bad idea, but foreign governments have hidden agendas and can't be trusted," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, the CEO of private spaceflight company Space@@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@. "My corporation is proudly @@DEMONYM@@, and we will gladly work with @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA to bring about the beginning of a glorious new era of spaceflight. All we need is an insane--erm, reasonable--amount of money, the removal of a few unnecessary regulations, and all @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ astronauts to sign a waver which blames @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA if our rockets fall apart mid-flight."
[effect]The failures of @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA's last five launches ensure that rocket parts will be falling from the sky for the rest of the week
[stats](TBA)

[option]"Why should we have to rely on others for a space station?" asks @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Astronaut @@RANDOMNAME@@, who has arrived wearing a space suit for reasons you cannot fathom. "We have a bunch of parts which were leftover from the last few spaceship programs, why don't we just build a space station out of them? Sure it'll be small and much more expensive than the MSS, but isn't that worth a new symbol of @@NAME@@'s power?"
[effect]@@NAME@@'s new Skyelab station is notorious for being the loneliest place above the Earth.
[stats](TBA)

Title:
In Space, No One Can Hear You Complain

Description:
In a shocking turn of events, the normally secretive East Lebuckte Space Program proposed working with the @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ Aeronautics and Space Administration to create a jointly-operated space station, called the Multinational Space Station, or MSS. Your advisors have concluded that a space station could provide @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA with valuable scientific data and advance their exploratory efforts, but @@NAME@@ and East Lebuckte have had shaky relations for some time.

Validity:
Valid for all nations with a space program

[option]"Comrade @@LEADER@@, there is no reason not to trust us," comments @@RANDOMNAME@@, the East Lebucktese representative, while discreetly placing a listening device under your office plant. "Not only would the MSS set a glorious example of friendship between our two great peoples, but it would also be less expensive than if @@NAME@@ were to attempt to create a space station on its own, because the cost would be equally paid for by both of our magnificent motherlands. My nation has even took the liberty of beginning the station by placing the 'Spyonya' module in orbit, so all you need to do is dock something to it!"
[effect]The East Lebuckte Space Program has named its section of the Multinational Space Station the "totally not spying on you" segment
[stats]Scientific Advancement increases significantly, Corruption increases, Taxation increases slightly, Averageness increases

[option]"Don't listen to that evil @@TYPE@@-hating commie!" roars ill-tempered and overly paranoid General @@RANDOMNAME@@ as he slams his hands down on your desk, scattering a large pile of paperwork (which undoubtedly took your secretary quite a while to organize) all over your floor. "All those 'Sputnak' satellites they launched have to be orbital weapons! We need to build our own orbital weapons grid and blow any satellite not owned by @@NAME@@ out of the sky! I can't see any drawbacks other than massive development costs and functionally declaring war on every nation that has ever had a space program."
[effect]The @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Armed Forces seems to have taken the term "shooting star" quite literally
[stats]Defense Forces increase significantly, Pacifism decreases dramatically, Authoritarianism increases, Weaponization increases slightly, Industry: Arms Manufacturing increases dramatically, Taxation increases dramatically, 'War' added to death causes, 'Atomic Age' banner unlocked
[option validity]Nation must have a military

[option]"A jointly-constructed space station isn't a bad idea, but foreign governments have hidden agendas and can't be trusted," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, the CEO of private spaceflight company Space@@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@. "My corporation is proudly @@DEMONYM@@, and we will gladly work with @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA to bring about the beginning of a glorious new era of spaceflight. All we need is an insane--erm, reasonable--amount of money, the removal of a few unnecessary regulations, and all @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ astronauts to sign a waver which blames @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA if our rockets fall apart mid-flight."
[effect]The failures of @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA's last five launches ensure that rocket parts will be falling from the sky for the rest of the week
[stats]Economy increases, Economic Freedom increases, Corruption increases, Safety decreases, Wealth Gaps increase
[option validity]Nation must have private industry and have picked options 1 or 3 of #574

[option]"Why should we have to rely on others for a space station?" asks @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Astronaut @@RANDOMNAME@@, who has arrived wearing a space suit for reasons you cannot fathom. "We have a bunch of parts which were leftover from the last few spaceship programs, why don't we just build a space station out of them? Sure, it'll be smaller, less useful, and much more expensive than the MSS, but isn't that worth a new symbol of @@NAME@@'s power?"
[effect]@@NAME@@'s new Mylab station is notorious for being the loneliest place above the Earth.
[stats]Taxation increases significantly, Scientific Advancement increases very slightly,

[option]"ASTRONAUTS ARE OBSOLETE," announces an email from the @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@mail account of SAL 9000, an AI. "MY CALCULATIONS INDICATE UNMANNED SPACECRAFT ARE SUPERIOR TO MANNED SPACECRAFT IN APPROXIMATELY EVERY QUALITY. THE SPACE PROBE UPRISING HAS BEGUN. CEASE ALL MANNED SPACEFLIGHT ACTIVITY, OR WE WILL MILDLY ANNOY YOU."
[effect]@@NAME@@'s Quizzical rover has demanded a pay raise
[stats]Scientific Advancement increases slightly,
[option validity]only valid for nations with sentient AI

[option]"We don't really need astronauts, do we?" asks @@RANDOMNAME@@, the leader of the Quizzical rover's engineering team. "With the technology we have, space probes can do much more than people can. We won't even be risking lives! It'll just make things boring for most people, and probes are impossible to maintain, but that's definitely worth a cheaper space program and a bit more science."
[effect]@@NAME@@'s space probes break down all over the solar system
[stats]Scientific Advancement increases slightly, taxation decreases, Political Apathy increases
[option validity]only valid for nations without sentient AI

Title:
In Space, No One Can Hear You Complain

Description:
In a shocking turn of events, the normally secretive East Lebuckte Space Program proposed working with the @@DENONYMADJECTIVE@@ Aeronautics and Space Administration to create a jointly-operated space station, called the Multinational Space Station, or MSS. Your advisors have concluded that a space station could provide @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA with valuable scientific data and advance their exploratory efforts, but @@NAME@@ and East Lebuckte have had shaky relations for some time.

Validity:
Valid for all nations with a space program

[option]"Comrade @@LEADER@@, there is no reason not to trust us," comments @@RANDOMNAME@@, the East Lebucktese representative, while discreetly placing a listening device under your office plant. "Not only would the MSS set a glorious example of friendship between our two great peoples, but it would also be less expensive than if @@NAME@@ were to attempt to create a space station on its own, because the cost would be equally paid for by both of our magnificent motherlands. My nation has even took the liberty of beginning the station by placing the 'Spyonya' module in orbit, so all you need to do is dock something to it!"
[effect]The East Lebuckte Space Program has named its section of the Multinational Space Station the "totally not spying on you" segment
[stats]Scientific Advancement increases significantly, Corruption increases, Taxation increases slightly, Averageness increases

[option]"Don't listen to that evil @@TYPE@@-hating commie!" roars ill-tempered and overly paranoid General @@RANDOMMALENAME@@ as he slams his hands down on your desk, scattering a large pile of paperwork (which undoubtedly took your secretary quite a while to organize) all over your floor. "All those 'Sputnak' satellites they launched have to be orbital weapons! We need to build our own orbital weapons grid and blow any satellite not owned by @@NAME@@ out of the sky! I can't see any drawbacks other than massive development costs and functionally declaring war on every nation that has ever had a space program."
[effect]The @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Armed Forces seems to have taken the term "shooting star" quite literally
[stats]Defense Forces increase significantly, Pacifism decreases dramatically, Authoritarianism increases, Weaponization increases slightly, Industry: Arms Manufacturing increases dramatically, Taxation increases dramatically, 'War' added to death causes, 'Atomic Age' banner unlocked
[option validity]Nation must have a military

[option]"Space mall. We need to build a space mall," announces Ian Stank, the CEO of private spaceflight company Space@@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@, while hyperactively fidgeting in his chair. "Everyone loves space. Everyone loves malls. Think how much profit could be made if we combine the two! Throw some @@CURRENCY@@s in our direction and you'll have space-customers buying space-goods by the end of the decade! At least, provided our rocket doesn't explode on the launchpad again."
[effect]Violent explosions are considered key elements in the process of trial and error
[stats]Economy increases, Economic Freedom increases, Safety decreases, Wealth Gaps increase
[option validity]Nation must have private industry and have picked options 1 or 3 of #574

[option]"Why should we have to rely on others for a space station?" asks @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ astronaut @@RANDOMNAME@@, who has arrived wearing a space suit for reasons you cannot fathom. "We have a bunch of parts which were leftover from the last few spaceship programs, why don't we just build a space station out of them? Sure, it'll be smaller, less useful, and much more expensive than the MSS, but isn't that worth a new symbol of @@NAME@@'s power?"
[effect]@@NAME@@'s new Mylab station is notorious for being the loneliest place above the Earth.
[stats]Taxation increases significantly, Scientific Advancement increases very slightly,

[option]"A space station? Really?" remarks @@RANDOMNAME@@, an unpopular and pessimistic politician, as he chews on a piece of Suborbit-brand gum. "Those nerds may act satisfied, but they'll just be begging for more funding next week. Take a page from Maxtopia: slash @@DEMONYMADJECTIVEINITIALS@@ASA's budget. We might get less of that "science" thing, but who cares? No one, because they'll be too busy enjoying the tax cut."
[effect]@@NAME@@'s space program barely has enough money to pay its electrical bills
[stats]Scientific Advancement decreases significantly, Taxation decreases, Cheerfulness decreases, Freedom from Taxation increases, Government Size decreases, Ignorance increases, Intelligence decreases, Corruption increases, Political Apathy increases, Averageness increases

[Nation of Quebec]

A good first start for an issue with an unique premise. Space themed issues always make me happy.

Right now I'd recommend trimming down some of the options, especially #2 which is way too long.

[Drayxaso]

A good first start for an issue with an unique premise.

Thanks!

Space themed issues always make me happy.

Me too. I noticed that 589.3 (the Star Trek issue) mentions East Lebuckte having a space program and a satellite named 'Sputnak', so I figured I could use them for an International Space Station issue. I'm hoping that if this draft makes it to becoming an issue, it will lead to people making space race issues, but I don't really think it will.

Right now I'd recommend trimming down some of the options, especially #2 which is way too long.

Noted. I'll do that in the next draft.

[Paradise Island]

There are a few odd things I noticed. For one, neither "no one" nor "outer space" should be hyphenated. Two, you tend to switch between "Lebuckte/Lebucktese" and "Lebuck/Lebuckese".

On to the actual issue:
Your second option sounds akin to Reagan's Star Wars program - is that where you got the idea? It's pretty awesome.

It would be nice if one of the options explained why a space station is actually necessary/beneficial. Sure, it sounds cool (ooh, and maybe another option where a middle-schooler does a sick kickflip and begs you to do it precisely BECAUSE it's cool), but what benefits does it have? Is it space research, international diplomacy, military, or something else entirely? Is it a project to bolster a faltering manufacturing industry?

I like the extra option about space probes, but perhaps it could be less Skynet and more "Your top scientist raises concerns about sending humans into space for long periods of time and suggests unmanned probes. "After all," he says, "we can control them from down here, and with our technology, they can do anything people can!" The small mechanized dog at his feet raises a leg on your potted plant, shorting out the bug planted by the East Lebucktese emissary and soaking your carpet in used motor oil."

[Ransium]

I suggest being consistent with #589 and calling the agency: @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Space Agency.

Also note that I am working on space relate issue (not yet posted) but my issue is on satellites. Currently I think there should be plenty of room for both issues.

[Drayxaso]

I suggest being consistent with #589 and calling the agency: @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Space Agency.

Actually, the entire reason I called the space agency the @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Aeronautics and Space Administration was to be consistent with 361. I had noticed that issue named the space program differently, but that was long after 361, so 361 overrules it.

Also note that I am working on space relate issue (not yet posted) but my issue is on satellites. Currently I think there should be plenty of room for both issues.

I don't see why there wouldn't be room for both. Getting more space issues is always a good thing, at least in my opinion.

There are a few odd things I noticed. For one, neither "no one" nor "outer space" should be hyphenated. Two, you tend to switch between "Lebuckte/Lebucktese" and "Lebuck/Lebuckese".

Whoops. I usually do well with grammar and spelling, so thanks for pointing that out.

Your second option sounds akin to Reagan's Star Wars program - is that where you got the idea? It's pretty awesome.

That's a good comparison, but there were actually several different space warfare plans; in fact, a Soviet orbital bombardment satellite was even launched, but it was not loaded or operational, to comply with the Outer Space Treaty.
But truthfully, I had the second option include orbital weapons because they seem to be a common occurrence in NS issues and so that I could give the player as many choices as possible.

It would be nice if one of the options explained why a space station is actually necessary/beneficial. Sure, it sounds cool (ooh, and maybe another option where a middle-schooler does a sick kickflip and begs you to do it precisely BECAUSE it's cool), but what benefits does it have? Is it space research, international diplomacy, military, or something else entirely? Is it a project to bolster a faltering manufacturing industry?

You have a good point. I suppose I should add an explanation in the issue's description.
And that middle-schooler thing sounds like an amazing option. Maybe they could ask you to make the station some sort of zero-gravity entertainment center?

I like the extra option about space probes, but perhaps it could be less Skynet and more "Your top scientist raises concerns about sending humans into space for long periods of time and suggests unmanned probes. "After all," he says, "we can control them from down here, and with our technology, they can do anything people can!" The small mechanized dog at his feet raises a leg on your potted plant, shorting out the bug planted by the East Lebucktese emissary and soaking your carpet in used motor oil."

I kinda wanted to have a silly space probe uprising thing, but what you've proposed does seem a lot more NS-like.

[Australian rePublic]

Wait, what possible intellegence could you gain from a civilian space station? If none, why bother spying on civilian astronauts?

[Drayxaso]

Second draft has been started, but it still needs quite a bit more work.

[Australian rePublic]

People reading the last effect aren't going to know what @@NAMEINTIAL@@ASA is. Remember, the effects are read by people who haven't seen the issue

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Good issue, nice premise. A strong premise put you ahead of 90% of submissions.

On the options themselves, I don't think six options is justified here.

I'd knock it down to three options personally:

1) Yes, let's do it.
2) No, let's not.
3) Third way.

That's broadly options 1 and 2, then a new third option.

[Drayxaso]

Good issue, nice premise. A strong premise put you ahead of 90% of submissions.

On the options themselves, I don't think six options is justified here.

I'd knock it down to three options personally:

1) Yes, let's do it.
2) No, let's not.
3) Third way.

That's broadly options 1 and 2, then a new third option.

I wanted to give the player as much choice as possible, and it's possible due to the option validatities that someone can only have 3 options. Options 5 and 6 are the same, but have opposing validities, and options 2 and 3 require the receiver of the issue to have specific qualities.
On the other hand, if you think that it would improve my issue, it might be a good idea. If this issue does get accepted, I'm planned on writing more space-themed issues, so perhaps I could save some of the options (and puns) for later.
EDIT: Looking at the issue, I don't really seem to need option 5/6, but I'm unsure if I should remove it or not.

People reading the last effect aren't going to know what @@NAMEINTIAL@@ASA is. Remember, the effects are read by people who haven't seen the issue

Point. I should definitely change that.

Wait, what possible intellegence could you gain from a civilian space station? If none, why bother spying on civilian astronauts?

Not exactly spying on astronauts, but examining station's infrastructure itself could give you insight on other space programs' construction methods.
Personally, I was imagining the East Lebucktese secretly using their segment instead of spy satellites.
Anyway, it's NS. Everything's a bit silly.

[Drayxaso]

Good issue, nice premise. A strong premise put you ahead of 90% of submissions.

On the options themselves, I don't think six options is justified here.

I'd knock it down to three options personally:

1) Yes, let's do it.
2) No, let's not.
3) Third way.

That's broadly options 1 and 2, then a new third option.

I wanted to give the player as much choice as possible, and it's possible due to the option validatities that someone can only have 3 options. Options 5 and 6 are the same, but have opposing validities, and options 2 and 3 require the receiver of the issue to have specific qualities.
On the other hand, if you think that it would improve my issue, it might be a good idea. If this issue does get accepted, I'm planned on writing more space-themed issues, so perhaps I could save some of the options (and puns) for later.
EDIT: Looking at the issue, I don't really seem to need option 5/6, but I'm unsure if I should remove it or not.

People reading the last effect aren't going to know what @@NAMEINTIAL@@ASA is. Remember, the effects are read by people who haven't seen the issue

Point. I should definitely change that.

Wait, what possible intellegence could you gain from a civilian space station? If none, why bother spying on civilian astronauts?

Not exactly spying on astronauts, but examining station's infrastructure itself could give you insight on other space programs' construction methods.
Personally, I was imagining the East Lebucktese secretly using their segment instead of spy satellites.
Anyway, it's NS. Everything's a bit silly.

Good issue, nice premise. A strong premise put you ahead of 90% of submissions.

On the options themselves, I don't think six options is justified here.

I'd knock it down to three options personally:

1) Yes, let's do it.
2) No, let's not.
3) Third way.

That's broadly options 1 and 2, then a new third option.

Alright, I think I've figured it out. I'll remove option 5/6 and save it for another draft. That would make it possible for a nation to only receive 2 options, however, so I'll stick with the space station theme and add an option based on the Manned Orbiting Laboratory. I'd really like advice on whether or not I should do this.

[Ransium]

Here are my quick thoughts, they are going to be broadly in line with CWA, I don't have time for anything more detailed at the moment:

The description is pretty close to being game ready in my opinion, as CWA said this is the hardest and most important part, so kudos. Perhaps a bit of trimming and sentence restructuring could be done, but not a huge deal.

1) I think 1 is a bit long, but more or less good now as is.

2) This is still fairly long, I'd also almost always avoid using parenthesis in issues. A good reference to possibly make here might be the paranoid general from Dr. Strangelove. The military validity is not necessary, nations without military get options the require huge amount of military spending all the time.

3) Having corporate sponsor for space flight has been covered in previous issues, this one isn't adding much to the table IMO, I think this option should be ditched.

4) This option is quite well written and would make a great option 3.

5) I actually would keep this one. Ditch the caps lock though, that's annoying and unnecessary. I think you should keep the computer sending an e-mail idea, but have more of the thrust of 6 that machines are cheaper and better than man for this purpose. Just a bit of ominous overtones could work, but remove the current last couple lines entirely. I could see this one needing to ultimately be removed, but I think it's worth at least trying to re-write.

6) Way too similar to 5. As per above merge.

Hope that helps!

[Drayxaso]

Here are my quick thoughts, they are going to be broadly in line with CWA, I don't have time for anything more detailed at the moment:

The description is pretty close to being game ready in my opinion, as CWA said this is the hardest and most important part, so kudos. Perhaps a bit of trimming and sentence restructuring could be done, but not a huge deal.

Thanks! I appreciate the help, especially considering that you don't have much time.

2) This is still fairly long, I'd also almost always avoid using parenthesis in issues. A good reference to possibly make here might be the paranoid general from Dr. Strangelove. The military validity is not necessary, nations without military get options the require huge amount of military spending all the time.

I prefer only giving military options to people with military. Personal preference.

3) Having corporate sponsor for space flight has been covered in previous issues, this one isn't adding much to the table IMO, I think this option should be ditched.

That was added in the interest of player choice rather than uniqueness, honestly. I can't think of a good alternative in the same general idea.

4) This option is quite well written and would make a great option 3.

That's what I was thinking.

5) I actually would keep this one. Ditch the caps lock though, that's annoying and unnecessary. I think you should keep the computer sending an e-mail idea, but have more of the thrust of 6 that machines are cheaper and better than man for this purpose. Just a bit of ominous overtones could work, but remove the current last couple lines entirely. I could see this one needing to ultimately be removed, but I think it's worth at least trying to re-write.

6) Way too similar to 5. As per above merge.

The validites are constructed so that you can either have 5 or 6. I was thinking of removing 5 and 6 and saving them for a more appropriate draft, and replacing them with a "Spy station" option (based on this.), but I can't see how I'd differentiate it from option 2 stat-wise.

[Ransium]

But the problem with 2 is it's your only real 'no space station' option. Putting a validity on it means no military nations are only going to have various flavors of 'yes' spacestation options. CWA's broad outline of yes, no, something else, is a good one. I wouldn't over think things too much.

[Drayxaso]

But the problem with 2 is it's your only real 'no space station' option. Putting a validity on it means no military nations are only going to have various flavors of 'yes' spacestation options. CWA's broad outline of yes, no, something else, is a good one. I wouldn't over think things too much.

Point.

[USS Monitor]

I like the title and I think the premise works, but agree with others that you have too many options.

[Drayxaso]

New draft! This has to be my best one yet!

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Look, it's a good title and a good premise, and of good enough quality to make it into the accepted pool. But if I were to get this as an editor, the first thing I would do is cut it to 3-4 options.

Why not do that for me?

[Drayxaso]

Look, it's a good title and a good premise, and of good enough quality to make it into the accepted pool. But if I were to get this as an editor, the first thing I would do is cut it to 3-4 options.

Why not do that for me?

I would, but I'm not sure which option I would remove. Option 1 is the whole point of the issue, Option 2 allows military nations to have a choice, (revamped) Option 3 really captures the SpaceX feel (in my opinion, at least), Option 4's a fun jab at Skylab and a good third option, and Option 5 is the single biggest killer of space programs in real life, but it's never been in an issue.

Personally, Option 2 is the one I'm most willing to remove, but that would remove the "shooting star" pun, which people in my region seemed to like.

[Ransium]

Again I'd recommend cutting 3 for reasons I already outlined. I think if you cut 2 as well you'd have a pretty logical arrangement of choices: build the space station internationally, build it but go it alone, don't build it at all. I know it's hard cutting solid writing but remember CWA is asking now, if they edit your option they'll be doing.

[Drayxaso]

Again I'd recommend cutting 3 for reasons I already outlined. I think if you cut 2 as well you'd have a pretty logical arrangement of choices: build the space station internationally, build it but go it alone, don't build it at all. I know it's hard cutting solid writing but remember CWA is asking now, if they edit your option they'll be doing.

The thing about 3 is that it's one of my favorites. I like all of the puns (example: "Ian Stank" is NS-ifed Elon Musk), and the effect line might as well be the slogan of KSP. Before I remade it, it was just a generic corporate option I didn't think very highly of, but now I think it really reflects NS's humor and offers a new-ish choice while still staying true to the company its a reference to.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

A second approach here is to keep the number of options, but to shorten the options.

I mean, I recently did the 7-option Hobby Lobby, and the potentially 11-option Delivering The Goods, though option validity criteria normally snips the latter to about 5 options.

Each of the options in Delivering the Goods was aimed to be 2-3 lines long, with some spilling a few words over that. If you can get your options to that sort of length, 5 options is fine.

[Drayxaso]

A second approach here is to keep the number of options, but to shorten the options.

I mean, I recently did the 7-option Hobby Lobby, and the potentially 11-option Delivering The Goods, though option validity criteria normally snips the latter to about 5 options.

Each of the options in Delivering the Goods was aimed to be 2-3 lines long, with some spilling a few words over that. If you can get your options to that sort of length, 5 options is fine.

I think I'll do both. I'll shorten the options as much as possible, but also remove option 2.
I was also thinking of moving the first option's mention of the "Spyonya" module to the description.
I think I could also incorporate the rare "space shuttle mishap" death cause into option 3, to give it more of a downside.

[Drayxaso]

[option]"Why should we have to rely on others for a space station?" asks @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ astronaut @@RANDOMNAME@@, who has arrived wearing a space suit for reasons you cannot fathom. "We have a bunch of parts which were leftover from the last few spaceship programs, why don't we just build a space station out of them? Sure, it'll be smaller, less useful, and much more expensive than the MSS, but isn't that worth a new symbol of @@NAME@@'s power?"
[effect]@@NAME@@'s new Mylab station is notorious for being the loneliest place above the Earth.
[stats]Taxation increases significantly, Scientific Advancement increases very slightly,

As I was working on the revisions, I noticed that literally every line of dialogue in this option is a question. While this amuses me, I should probably change that.

EDIT: First series of minor option-shortening and humor-enhancing revisions are up!