ATTENTION: THIS A DECLARATION OF WAR
THE RUSSIAN PEOPLES, UNITED IN RUSSIAN POWER, WOMEN, AND VODKA,
CONDEMNING THE EVILS OF COMMUNISM
DESPISING FAKE RUSSIANS WHO TRY TO SPREAD COMMUNISM
WORSHIPING THE GLORY OF OUR PRESIDENT AND LEADER
DEMANDING THE DEATH OF ALL SPINELESS COMMUNISTS, MAY THEY BURN TO DEATH IN UNQUENCHING FIRE
HEREBY, DECLARE TOTAL AND COMPLETE WAR AGAINST THE NATION OF THE UNITED RUSSIAN SOVIET STATES AND WE SHALL NOT STOP UNTIL THEY HAVE BEEN DESTROYED
Signed
President Victor Petrov of the Sovereign Russian Federative Republics
Prime Minister Yuri Spalovalov of the Sovereign Russian Federative Republics
Chairman Dimitry Yubolev of the Congress of the Russian Federative Peoples
RATIFIED UNANIMOUSLY BY THE CONGRESS OF THE RUSSIAN FEDERATIVE PEOPLES WITH NOT DISSENT OR OPPOSITION. EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATLY