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by **Farfadillis** » Wed Jul 08, 2020 3:56 pm

Flamagua

Manager: Cayo Punta
Nickname: las Llamas
Home Stadium: La Fogata Mojada (25,000)
Home City: Gran Farol, Puerto Farolero

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Julio Miranda -LB-

Hugo Sisneros -CB-

Alex Enríquez -RB-

Jaime Tejada -DM-

Víctor Adorno -LM-

Ramón Gómez -CM-

Josué Montemayor -RM-

Gabriel Tovar -OM-

Noé Salazar -OM-

Jesús Armendáriz -ST-

Armando Heredia

Bench: aGKa

Jorge Arellano aGKa

Pablo Roque aLBa

Rafael Madrigal aCBa

Ernesto Gamboa aRBa

Gustavo Ruelas aDMa

Merlín Demateo aLMa

Leonardo Uribe aCMa

Alejandro Tovar aRMa

Adrián Barreto aOMa

Hugo Lerma aOMa

Jesús Colón aSTa

Emerico Fortanel

Background: Flamagua is the least successful of the "big" Faroleran clubs. All the (good) Avenidas have won the FFL more than once, yet Flamagua only have two bronze medals to their names. This hasn't stopped them from having massive (and violent) support, however. They are, after all, the only relevant club from a big working-class city. Their supporters are refreshingly uninterested in politics, though they don't shy away from xenophobic chants, knowing full well it riles up the Rulandese. In short, Flamagua are a football club that concerns itself with football only, and so do their fans. Unfortunately for them, they have never been that good at said football, but that doesn't mean the fans can't dream.
State League Performance: Pretty bad. They're clearly far from the Avenidas' level at the moment.
Strengths: Last season, they surprised everyone with their very solid defense: only 33 goals conceded in 21 games. Even though nobody in defense looks particularly talented, Punta has managed to turn them into quite a cohesive unit; he's done something truly kinda special.
Weaknesses: Armando Heredia is still very, very wasteful. Many hope youngster Fortanel breaks into the starting eleven and starts banging them in. Besides that, Ramón Gómez is getting old, and it's never good to be playing on the flank when that happens.
Best Players: Salazar and Armendáriz are still, by and large, by far the best players on the team. They can make magic happen, and they have great chemistry. While last season we pigeonholed them into a faux-winger and playmaker role respectively, they proved much more versatile than that last season. Not like this helped much, however: Heredia truly missed a shit ton of chances.
Young Prospects: Emerico Fortanel is rumoured to have all of Heredia's good qualities (or to be destined to have them, at least), whilst not being useless at actually scoring. Fans are delighted. If he disappoints, we might see suicides.
Prediction: We can't ignore how mediocre they've been lately. 15th.

Prostran I Forzuda

Manager: Djoko Ljotic
Nickname: Divljaci
Home Stadium: Bojno Polje (40,000)
Home City: Prostran, Karuvis

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Milos Lucic -LB-

Vukmir Poparić -CB-

Mladen Tirnanic -RB-

Jugoslav Radonjic -DM-

Miladin Misimovic -CM-

Vlatka Ojdanic -CM-

Kalinik Musovic -LW-

Savatije Prodanovic -RW-

Svetislav Cirkovic -ST-

Vladislav Skoro -ST-

Tomo Mrkonjic

Bench: aGKa

Aleksa Radosevic aGKa

Andrija Sasic aLBa

Filotije Milinkovic aCBa

Damir Jestrović aRBa

Radojko Momcilovic aDMa

Bosko Vlatkovic aCMa

Milko Belacevic aCMa

Todor Jaksic aLWa

Zlatko Pistalo aRWa

Vuk Pavkovic aSTa

Neven Perisic aSTa

Radovan Jokanovic

Background: A team from the twin cities of Prostran and Forzuda, hence the name, Prostran I Forzuda have one of the biggest fanbases in all of Farfadillis, and it is for very similar reasons to René Skaé: they're the only good team in their state. Their state being one of the most ethnically divergent from the Farf norm, their fanbase is naturally one of the most passionate as well. If a Rulandese equivalent were to exist, they'd win just about every league title; Divljaci have a monopoly on Karuvan talent. So much so, that they can afford to only allow Karuvans to play for the club. Beyond their passion, their fans have ties with the military, religious institutions, and fascist movements. Even the Ferdullaelans find them a bit too extreme at times.
State League Performance: They won the state league handily, then dispatched Torrhe del Viento in the play-offs, though with a bit more difficulty than most expected. Nonetheless, it's been smooth sailing so far.
Strengths: As always, the player's nationalism translates to the pitch. They are, for all intents and purposes, representing the Kruviš national team. They will fight for every inch. They're also, as Kruviši, generally tall and/or fast. This translates to a rather successful run-down-the-flank-and-cross playstyle. Short centerbacks and slow fullbacks beware.
Weaknesses: Their defense is still way too slow, but last season proved the Kruviši have another weakness, which is actually just the other side of their greatest strength: they are way too easy to wind up. They lost 6-4 to Interluz, the kings of shithousing, because they managed to get four players sent off while three goals up.
Best Players: Yes, their best player is still Milos Lucic. He managed to concede a respectable 52 in 21 last season, despite pacey wingers completely torching his backline. One of the best goalkeepers in the league, without a doubt. Jugoslav Radonjic's experience and leadership make him second best in this team, behind Lucic. Well, when he's not chasing pacey wingers, that is.
Young Prospects: Savatije Prodanovic and Svetislav Circkovic both managed to break into the starting eleven last season, as fans hoped. The two twenty-year-olds are shaping up to be fan favorites: Prodanovic's brand of running-fast-and-crossing is something the Kruviši love, while Cirkovic's brand of inside forwardiness is very easy on the eye, and his one-footedness is endearing.
Prediction: 14th seems about right for them, but they could do better if they rein themselves in a bit.

Lasupi

Manager: Iulian Dirsenren
Nickname: las Gaviotes
Home Stadium: Samupi (5,000)
Home City: Lasupi, Ferdullaele

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Joan Fer Muus -LB-

Aspar Escasé -CB-

Felragi Shontarí -CB-

Mageuely Grrhonomó -RB-

Lihonhegeí Gromaé -LM-

Frion Dandeguerrhe -CM-

Yung Aerrhenené -RM-

Herrhemengaúl Andaní -OM-

Elasomé Rossi -OM-

Elasomé Banderíyi -ST-

Joséy Xórtafe

Bench: aGKa

Gugiundo Donederfía aGKa

Somuemundé Andaluzzei aLBa

Bertami Onsemú aCBa

Aspar Ficús aCBa

Bambarrheiré Aresueduiraé aRBa

Ezelefra Racadó aLMa

Rancisc Banga aCMa

Ezalta Guado aRMa

Mazurisele Greffe aOMa

Aspar Mondé aOMa

Benjaminí Karuvanó aSTa

Dangué Deltuarrhe

Background: Lasupi are a very, very small club. From the town of Lasupi, in Ferdullaele, they have the smallest following in the league. This gives them a rather low ceiling economically, but they're managed so well they can still perform at an FFL level. The two or three thousand fans that turn up every week must feel very special, because no team this small has ever been this big in Farfadillis. Nobody in the country really dislikes them, except when it's because of ethnic tension.
State League Performance: A surprisingly solid performance leaves onlookers asking themselves the following question: have Lasupi gotten better or has the whole state gotten worse? It's probably both.
Strengths: As always, Lasupi will take every game very seriously, to the very last matchday. The club is pretty small (read: poor) and thus needs every bit of money it can get, and the FFFF hands out money based on league placement. What's more, as a small town, the community is very tightly-knit, and it includes the players, so this team can draw on some much-needed us vs them mentality.
Weaknesses: What happens when half your players come from a town/city of fifteen thousand people? They tend to not be that good. We gotta hand it to Lasupi: most other town slash cities would never come close to fielding a starting eleven this talented, but the truth is it's not quite enough, try as they might to copensate for it with grit and determination.
Best Players: Yes, it's still Joan Fer Muus, and it will probably be for another decade. They've really struck gold with him: a very talented goalkeeper who could've gotten capped for Farfadillis with some more luck who has decided to stay at Lasupi for his entire career. He wouldn't look out of place starting for any team in the league. His only weakness is his loyalty.
Young Prospects: If his state league performances are anything to go by, Joséy Xórtafe looks like he might have left his terrible first season behind and become a bit of a good player. He's fast-ish, clinical-ish and an aerial threat-ish. Quite impressive for a nineteen-year-old: we'll see how he fares in the FFL.
Prediction: They're a club that make do with what they have, and are really good at it. Our brain says they'd finish at best, say, 16th. But they always manage to surprise us, so we're going with 13th.

Fryi Frêndê

Manager: Crouxé Mansino
Nickname: los Lleiones
Home Stadium: Casa del Lleion (20,000)
Home City: Eferrhe, Ferdullaele

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Felragi Granagua -LB-

Matí Dohás -CB-

Matt Hall -CB-

Marrhe Rená -RB-

Caémenó Cílorrgué -LM-

Caémiró Saguzalé -CM-

Nadufoí Dohás -RM-

Yung Dandeluneí -OM-

Sanguscó Matacostelas -ST-

Chusí Rrhambú -ST-

Iulian Boté

Bench: aGKa

Gudió Torre aGKa

Dieje Fadeivá aLBa

Caémiró Ágdiren aCBa

Ezelefra Sherrha aCBa

Sarrovelstri Filís aRBa

Dangué Fadeivá aLMa

Neguimbelefra Aesöhu aCMa

Garrego Gorsó aRMa

Gurmund Argué aOMa

Feien Budelínea aSTa

Erfaon Lalá'Rrhueré aSTa

Edé Gondadola

Background: Fryi Frêndê is the most traditional team in Farfadillis, in a sense. They're the one and only team to have played in every FFL season, and they're very proud of that record. They've got one of the biggest fanbases in Ferdullaele, but since it's composed mostly of affluent suburban Ferdullaelans, it's not a particularly loud or aggressive fanbase. Their lukewarmness off-the-pitch is reflected by their results on the pitch: no major titles to speak of. Politically, they're one of the most hardline anti-Ruland teams in the league, behind only Interluz and Ferdullaele. Much like Interluz's fanbase, they're in favor of the secession of their home state. Their anti-Ruland stance is somewhat ironic, as they're a club named after their founder, a Rulandese man.
State League Performance: Once again, Fryi Frêndê were tryhards in the state league. They were, however, not much better than their fellow Ferdullaelans, even if they did end up coming out on top. They'll hope to be in better form come the FFL, though.
Strengths: Their defense proved quite solid last season, even if the midfield let them down very reliably. They've added Kalactanian (did I get that right?) Matt Hall to an already-solid defense, and he's rumoured to be quite good. Their two strikers are also quite clinical and get the job done whenever the midfield helps. Also, Granagua is a pretty good goalkeeper.
Weaknesses: So yeah, basically their midfield sucks. Take Matacostelas out of it and no clear FFL caliber player is left. Dohás and Saguzalé are still not FFL-quality, while Dandeluneí is completely unproven at this level. They got run over most games last season, and that's unlikely to change.
Best Players: Sanguscó Matacostelas first and foremost: he's a very complete offensive midfielder with a vast skillset and their only way to get the ball to the forwards without lots of luck. Besides him, Granagua and Hall are expected to stand out in defense.
Young Prospects: Marrhe Rená is only twenty, but he was already very good last season; he can only get better. Paired alongside young-though-not-quite-young-enough-to-feature-in-this-section Matt Hall, they could impress enough to have some bigger team sign them as a package.
Prediction: This one is hard to predict. It all depends on just how much their midfield drags them down. Let's go with 12th.

Ausharmuj Marusi

Manager: Ey Farrháteré
Nickname: la Sindica
Home Stadium: Multisportivé Joan Roaré (17,000)
Home City: Bolanos, Ferdullaele

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Giolehe Inflax -LB-

Valdo Kímé -CB-

Horacéi Xúrkaroá -CB-

Ecésar der Efer -RB-

Soirelí der Reneska -CM-

Liberté Salogadó -CM-

Eslejes Aljojí -LW-

Danoé Anders -OM-

Anviungar Fuadé -RW-

Antu Ouattara -ST-

Maguiliní Spoheí

Bench: aGKa

Erazem Askanter aGKa

Garrehemí Crenago aLBa

Herrhemengaúl der Ezse aCBa

Somuemundé Andaní aCBa

Gianlei Bula aRBa

Kaé Fargá aCMa

Madusmé Ukén aCMa

Cicek Aga aLWa

Nerianeknoé der Reneska aOMa

Féipé Cronologó aRWa

Samahuhe Axjos aSTa

Kamara Mboge

Background: The only left-wing team in Ferdullaele, the wealthy capital state that had control over Farfadillis until only a few years ago. Why are they the only left-wing team? Because the team is still heavily associated with the syndicate that founded it, so they have by far the largest working-class fanbase outside Ruland. Left-wing as they may be, though, they're very much Ferdullaelan nationalists like almost all other teams in the capital. They're hated outside Ferdullaele for this and hated inside Ferdullaele for their other political views. They relish this.
State League Performance: Yes, they finished 4th, but they rotated a lot and clearly didn't care enough. They also were two points away from being champions, so it's hard to draw catastrophic conclusions from their state league performance.
Strengths: Their midfield was their best area last season and is also, counterintuitively, the one they improved on the most with their transfers. Ouattara and Aljojí are quite unproven, but if they turn out to be as good as they are expected to be, you should expect la Sindica dominate every match against smaller teams, and not get overrun against even Mâ Âlâmëómë or René Skaé.
Weaknesses: They still suffer from being bad at finishing the job. They played very attractive, attacking football last season and got great results out of it, but one can't help but feel like they could've scored considerably more. Spoheí is still not good enough for this team, and subtitute Kamara Mboge is only eighteen, so not expected to replace him any time soon.
Best Players: Liberté Salogadó is a World Cup winner. He's got five glorious minutes of World Cup glory to his name, admittedly five more than most players in the Multiverse. He's the engine of this team. He never seems to run out of gas, and he can always split a defense apart with a good pass, as well as help out defensively. There's also Soirelí der Reneska, who's also capped. He'll do a good job on the right flank. He's sucked when given a chance at the NT, though.
Young Prospects: Ausharmuj Marusi are clearly trying to save money by buying talented players young and developing them themselves. The hilariously-named Cicek Aga (if you speak Faroleran, at least), the Indujan Samahuhe Axjos, and the Banijans Kamara Mboge and Antu Ouattara evidence this. In our opinion, Aga and Mboge are the ones you should look out for, but it's too early to tell just how good they'll be, or indeed what they'll be good at.
Prediction: This is a great team, undone by the fact that they are quite bad at converting their chances. Inflax is also ok at best, so we'll have to go with 11th, but they could very well do much better than that.

Gorfalle Town

Manager: Sisaí Vilá
Nickname: los Canarís
Home Stadium: Parque Erfaon Lisdiren (10,000)
Home City: Gorfalle, Ferdullaele

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Damusmundy Sasca -LB-

Liberté Conosjeró -CB-

Berrhemengar Eregro -CB-

Bertami Asalia -RB-

Fonás Filosufé -CM-

Reimoundé Maludé -CM-

Gianluigi Sabí -LW-

Felragi Deltuarrhe -OM-

Madusmé Strela -RW-

Ezalta Arambauzá -ST-

Nacio Solesé

Bench: aGKa

Ifarmé Barbá'Rrhé aGKa

Chusí Conosjeró aLBa

Neguimbelefra Indujanó aCBa

Lounoi Chaoré aCBa

Cubí der Riviska aRBa

Arfibiá Rulandeo aCMa

Gundai Sappaté aCMa

Kaé Gangerda aLWa

Vili Dubalá aOMa

Garrego der Nos aRWa

Garrehemí Altamirano aSTa

Giolihonsada Kímé

Background: A small club from the town of Gorfalle (no points for guessing that), Gorfalle Town have a history of overachievement. They're most famous for producing one of the most capped Farf players in history, Erfaon Lisdiren, and for giving Ichi Tuzzio his first job as manager. Their management is one of the best in the nation. They've gotten by on a heavy emphasis on youth development and good football, as well as getting value for money on their transfers. All of those things are easier said than done, and not particularly innovative ideas, but the important thing is that this club does them very well. They're among the most politically apathetic clubs in the nation, largely because management thinks any kind of political allegiance might backfire in the long run.
State League Performance: They may have finished second, but they were the best team in the league, and it's not like they were obsessed with winning the league, like Fryi Frêndê. They showed good signs of things to come.
Strengths: They've got some great players on the flanks, with pace and technique to spare. They'll wreck any team that doesn't have fast fullbacks. Furthermore, they can stretch any defensive thin with how adept they are at playing wide, which is actually quite rare for a Farf team. Their defense is also used to this, so there'll be less room to exploit their positioning than one would think.
Weaknesses: Besides Sasca's occasional howler, what should worry los Canarís is how young and inexperienced their midfield is. Some of this players are experienced for their age, sure, but they don't quite show it yet. Expect unnecessary red cards and inconsistent performances from an otherwise quality midfield.
Best Players: Their two wingers are a nightmare for slow defenses, as we've said. Deltuarrhe will punish you if you give him so much as a meter of space, while Arambauzá is your typical talented prodigy who seems to be good at basically everything. Both of them can tear defenses to shreds with their speed, while Arambauzá can also be very threatening when cutting inside.
Young Prospects: Besides Arambauzá, Reimoundé Maludé should also be highlighted. The center midfielder did not stand out last season, yes, but he also held his own at a very young age. We'll see how much he's grown since.
Prediction: A very solid team, with some weaknesses, but we're clearly in "might make the Challengers' Cup" territory now. We'll go with 10th place for our prediction.

Avenida Principal

Manager: Fons Argáez
Nickname: los Caballeros
Home Stadium: La Gran Avenida (60,000)
Home City: Victoria Lago, Puerto Farolero

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Lemuel Bereket -LB-

Abram Aguayo -CB-

Ramón Gonzales -CB-

Orlando Soria -RB-

Emilio Frondarina -CM-

Lucián Saldivar -CM-

Óliver Tijerina -TK-

Alson Figueroa -LW-

Alonzo de Anda -RW-

Leandro Martelli -ST-

Joel Cotto

Bench: aGKa

Godofredo Armendez aGKa

Alejandro Montes aLBa

Lucas Valdés aCBa

Celio Astol aCBa

José Henríquez aRBa

Rodrigo Terrazas aCMa

Abraham Mondragón aCMa

Adrián Fajardo aTKa

Jorge Varela aLWa

Andrés Valdez aRWa

Celio Pompa aSTa

Emiliano Barreto

Background: Avenida Principal is, you guessed it, one of the Avenidas. They are following in Avenida Victoria's footsteps: they've been in a clear downturn for about ten seasons now. Bizarrely, they're generally agreed to be the richest team in the country. In the past, they used to have the most foreigners in the league. Nowadays, well... they've had to change plans, and it hasn't helped them one bit. The good news is they've started funding their academy a lot more, and a few talented youngsters have appeared in their ranks. Politically, as the most affluent team in the nation, and having some of the most affluent fans outside Ferdullaele, you can guess what their allegiances are...
State League Performance: Not a great sign, admittedly, but there are worse things than being the fourth best team in the Faroleran league.
Strengths: Their money. They sold off Adrián Raya, yes, but they made up for it by investing heavily in a better midfield, and it's hard to argue it hasn't paid off. They've got a lot of offensive talent and one player who is good at defending (yes, of course it's the Taeshani). This makes them dangerous and relatively stable for the league. Furthermore, they've now got none other than Lemuel Bereket in goal.
Weaknesses: Last season, they suffered greatly against counterattacking teams, just as we predicted. While their new signings make alleviate this in the long run, their state league performances say they haven't quite managed that yet. Teams that are good at holding possession turned out not to be as big of a problem as we thought they'd be, though.
Best Players: Lemuel Bereket is too big of a name for Avenida Principal at the moment. He's in the twilight of his career, yes, but it's still a career most players in this league would do well to emulate a tenth of. In midfield, Alson Figueroa's a long-time Taeshan NTer with great defensive skills that will be put to the test in a much more offensive league. He'll be employed as a takilante; we'll have to see how it goes. It's experimental, to say the least. Alonzo de Anda and Leandro Martelli are expected to make opposing defenses have nightmares, with the former being incredibly fast and the latter being an unsurprisingly technical Valladar.
Young Prospects: Celio Pompa has a funny name. He'll be sitting on the bench for now, but Joel Cotto should watch out. This dyed-in-the-wool poacher is said to be quite good at scoring many, many tap-ins. It's a dark art, but a very useful one.
Prediction: While their season hasn't gone the way they hoped it would so far, it's undeniable that they're a very good team. We'll go with 9th.

Rülândéá Kôstä

Manager: Fêrm Égéré
Nickname: tâ Kôstä
Home Stadium: Âréné Délékôstä (10,000)
Home City: Ruland, Ruland

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Horâcio Mâ Mórsna -LB-

Pâb Bílísô -CB-

Rímân Röènôùjýâ -RB-

Lînó Çíwâ -CM-

Erin Kang -CM-

Baraxil Muhaburu -TK-

Émérí Dü Ârusânìrá -LW-

Merluxia van de Kraan -RW-

Çè Sêwansé -ST-

Pâás Wí Tírâ -ST-

Röémün Çídh

Bench: aGKa

Jâv Tulipão aGKa

Jê Êrgön aLBa

Éskïr Lûoo aCBa

Pâb Ýuó aRBa

Vínseslâdís Nêxvêrsôlöká aCMa

Mâánü Düsnans aCMa

Kârl Víçâr aTKa

Çìríkô Tlísnadâ aLWa

Fonás Nêndêlögâö aRWa

Valën Rónellsön aSTa

Kâákî Bênano aSTa

Pâás Çélçôl

Background: Rülândéá Kôstä are massive in Ruland's coast. When we say massive, we mean truly massive. Most everyone in the city's coast suport the team named after the city's coast which, to be fair, is probably not shocking. Their supporters have very strong ties to the revolutionary movements of the last two decades, and are violent even by Rulandese standards. Their stadium, partially destroyed by bombings, will probably pack twice its capacity every game. Surprisingly, tâ Kôstä has a very friendly relationship with all other Rulandese clubs, seeing them more as family than rivals. Teams from outside Ruland, though? Well, that's a very different story...
State League Performance: There are four good teams in Ruland at the moment. This is the fourth best, if the state league is anything to go by. There isn't much else to add.
Strengths: The team is very young (as of this season) and shows remarkable fluidity on the pitch. They've added a couple of foreigners to their midfield, so they've now got some talented players to add to their whole greater-than-the-sum-of-its-parts schtick (because foreigners always seem to do well here, for whatever reason). They will switch up tactics in the middle of a match and throw their opponents off. It's a lot of fun.
Weaknesses: With the retirement of so many old-timers, the team is now pretty inexperienced. Hell, Émérí Dü Ârusânìrá is the only starter over 23, and he's 27, so hardly a veteran. Expect this inexperience to show in more bottling than last seaosn, when it was already rather.
Best Players: It's hard to pick out the best players from this team, because the likely best players have had little time to show their quality. Nonetheless, Erin Kang is most likely the best of the bunch here. She brings physicality to the midfield, and strikes the right balance between offense and defense while having a complete skillset. Merluxia and Muhaburu have shown a lot of potential as well, with the former more technical and the latter more of an, uh, warrior. Émérí Dü Ârusânìrá is the second best player after Erin, though. The takilante makes the team tick, and will be a thorn on the side of every side.
Young Prospects: Every starter not named Émérí, really. But if you want to feel like a snob, Pâb Ýuó is perhaps the most unsung of the very talented youngsters in this team. The centerback is tall, fast and sucks at football. Well, at the part that Farves care about. He'd make a good normal defender in most any other league. There's definitely a niche for this type of player in the league, so following his development will be interesting.
Prediction: This is as exciting a team as you can get. Great football, lots of young talent, and a very, very interesting fanbase. However, once again, it's hard to look past their inexperience and tendency to crack under pressure. We predict they'll finish in a very respectable 7th place.

by **Farfadillis** » Wed Jul 08, 2020 9:54 pm

Avenida Victoria

Manager: Ludovicus Elorreaga
Nickname: Victorianos
Home Stadium: La Gran Avenida (60,000)
Home City: Victoria Lago, Puerto Farolero

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Lucián Medrano -LB-

Beatrice Colgan -CB-

Fernando Manzanares -CB-

Sofronio Lopezmendoza -RB-

Rubén Hinojosa -LM-

Héctor Parra -CM-

Lancelot Mojica -CM-

Remigio Exinia -RM-

Alex Benavídez -ST-

Matías Soria -ST-

Alexis Guerra

Bench: aGKa

Omar Serrano aGKa

Carlos Verdugo aLBa

Abram Rascón aCBa

Miguel Espinosa aCBa

Fernando Manzanares aRBa

Afa Zasamoo aLMa

Héctor Parra aCMa

Lancelot Mojica aCMa

Remigio Exinia aRMa

Alex Benavídez aSTa

Antonio Collado aSTa

Daniel Gastélum

Background: The first big Avenida team. Of the big ones, the smallest. Most Avenida Victoria fans are still proud of how their team helped destroy the Ferdullaele monopoly of the league back in season 3, after decades of total hegemony from the capital city's club. Success was short-lived for Avenida Victoria, though: they only won the FFL in seasons 3 and 4. Their fans are hopelessly optimistic, though, and one can see why: they continuously produce some very talented footballers. They have a very intense rivalry with La Nueva Avenida - the only rivalry in Farfadillis comparable to lâ Rülândéá Kâlâsïk. El Clásico, as the fans call it, is always a very heated affair, and red cards tend to fly.
State League Performance: Extremely encouraging, except for one thing: they slipped up in the final matchday, losing the title to Avenida Leal by losing el Clásico 5-0.
Strengths: They've got a very interesting midfield that seem to be in complete synch, judging by their latest performances. Losing club legend Ramón Fonseca (to retirement) hasn't been relevant because Remigio Exinia is quickly becoming a fan favorite with his endless running and brilliant playmaking. A great understudy for Lancelot Mojica.
Weaknesses: Matías Soria and Alexis Guerra are flat-track bullies. They tend to disappear in important games and, well, it's far from ideal. The rest of the team can pick up their slack occasionally, but they'll still have acute trouble getting past the best defenses in the league.
Best Players: Yes, it's still Lancelot Mojica. He's a complete midfielder and a great leader. Rubén Hinojosa, the other capped Farf, is not quite as good, but is also one of the best actually defensive players in the league. The aforementioned Remigio Exinia has also been getting better and better, and is in with a shout for second best player if his development continues.
Young Prospects: Since Exinia is already twenty-three, we'll have to go with Sofronio Lopezmendoza here. The centerback has burst into the scene out of nowhere - reportedly, he hadn't even been a part of Avenida Victoria's youth set-up, he merely got scouted when he was playing amateur football. He's tall, fast and fearsome. You don't want to get in his way. He is also ok on the ball, which is always a plus.
Prediction: They've been looking great, but we're not ready to go all the way and predict them to finish in IFCF spots. We'll go with 7th place for them.

Lâ Lüs

Manager: Ülì Çôçô
Nickname: Rëvôlüsìnârs
Home Stadium: Dês Käìds (4,000)
Home City: Ômên, Ruland

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Wilsrë Râsáás -LB-

Lôrénsé Jâtíêsà -CB-

Trî Gânö -CB-

Lînó Xösá -RB-

Mâáx Gôreýl -CM-

Nufro de Urueña -CM-

Blâás Sârátêgí -LW-

Ríqué t'Ômixés -OM-

Mâáx Lâçâlânzoô -RW-

Tôsgo Alxíkí -ST-

Çè Quîrijá

Bench: aGKa

Trî Jíí aGKa

Pâás Tûto aLBa

Ôrelí Dü Sêr aCBa

Jérôn Gínê aCBa

Yülàáê Tlâhu aRBa

Tômâás Hrushór aCMa

Lídôr Érêgê aCMa

Bêlá Düjân aLWa

Sàntîó Mêjor aOMa

Mâxímö Sírspâl aRWa

Émílíâno Símaurêné aSTa

Váyárdö Jôùjárânneá

Background: One of the youngest clubs in the league, Lâ Lüs was founded about twenty years ago, when the Rulandese revolutionary movement was beginning to gain traction. They were founded by revolutionaries and their sympathizers, in the run-down city of Ômên, which is like Ruland but a bit worse. The city of Ômên has already rallied behind them, so their small stadium will be filled every game. With the revolutionary sympathies (or, rather, fanaticism), and with Ômên being on the frontier with Puerto Farolero, you can guess just how heated games against Faroleran teams will get. It is worth noting that, due to Rulandese infrastructure being rather suboptimal, the city of Ômên has rarely produced FFL footballers. This effectively means Lâ Lüs has a monopoly on a Rulandese city with untapped potential. Oh, by the way, this is apparently literally an armed faction of freedom fighters/terrorists fronting as a football club, as it turns out. The more you know.
State League Performance: The only reason we are not completely shocked they came astonishingly close to winning the league is that they already shocked us all by coming in second in the FFL last season. We are now only mildly shocked to see it doesn't appear to be a fluke.
Strengths: They play like they're a bunch of nationalist fanatics. They won't stop running, they won't stop going for "very rough" when it comes to their challenges, and they won't stop trying to score, regardless of circumstance.
Weaknesses: We thought they'd crumble in big games, but their performances didn't seem to take huge dips. We've found that, instead, their biggest weakness happens to be their biggest strength: they sometimes run too much, and commit one too many fouls. They're cutting it close with their playstyle and it sometimes backfires, specially against teams that can go blow for blow against them. This is how they lost 10-3 to René Skaé last season, a game that ended up handing the Szoirsians the title.
Best Players: They've got plenty of very talented young players, but it's hard not to focus on Tôsgo Alxíkí. The winger is already starting for la Vherderoja aged eighteen. He shreds defenses with his speed and/or his dribbling. He's also very clinical and can play as a striker if need be. He is, also, quite tall and very good at heading. What is he not good at? Playmaking, arguably. He's good at it, but nothing to write home about when compared to his other skills. He's also a great crosser. We're all excited to see how he fares at the World Cup!
Young Prospects: Leaving aside Alxíkí, Quîrìjá burst into the scene last season as an impressive, pretty complete striker that seems to have a decade of top flight experience while not even cracking twenty. However, half the starting eleven could go in this section, really.
Prediction: This is an extremely talented team with a lot of passion - for better or worse; usually for the better - and now with additional tequila. They've shown they're good enough to challenge for IFCF spots, but it's hard to predict where they'll land. They could regress to the mean and become a midtable team, or they could win the title. Let's go with a nice, neutral prediction: 6th place. ±5.

La Nueva Avenida

Manager: Grant Pickton
Nickname: los Novanos
Home Stadium: La Gran Avenida (60,000)
Home City: Victoria Lago, Puerto Farolero

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Paige Daunten -LB-

Fabián Saiz -CB-

Vyacheslav Khavarin -RB-

Case Ruderby -DM-

César Montemayor -CM-

Fernand Way -CM-

Daniel Murillo -LW-

Emiliano Gallegas -OM-

Enrique Delrío -RW-

Fulgencio Mercedes -ST-

Salomón Dezuniga

Bench: aGKa

Orlando Bétancourt aGKa

Benjamín Gaona aLBa

David Guajardo aCBa

Emanuel Altamirano aRBa

Fabián Malave aDMa

Furia de Jesús aCMa

César Blanco aCMa

Rafael Bueno aLWa

Alfredo Luján aOMa

Arturo Briseño aRWa

Simón Delvalle aSTa

Nicolás Frías

Background: The most successful of the Avenida clubs, and the second most successful in the nation, La Nueva Avenida are a club focused on success. While their supporters have a bit of a xenophobic right-wing (ecological) streak at times, the truth is people of every type support them in their home state, purely because of how successful they've been historically. After a dark period of not winning anything, they finally managed to win the league again three seasons ago, and they're building on that to retake the crown that Mâ Âlâmëómë stole from them. Expect their matches with Avenida Victoria to be very heated because of their historical rivalry. Nowadays, their games against Mâ Âlâmëómë are surprisingly heated, too, probably due to both teams being by far the most successful.
State League Performance: They may have finished third, but they were every bit as good as Avenida Leal and Avenida Victoria, even thrashing the latter 5-0 in the final matchday.
Strengths: Their history breeds a winning mentality, or at least that's what the fans would have you believe. It seems to be true to an extent: whenever they look to be in crisis or maybe not quite as good, they always seem to adapt. They're not attached to any one playstyle and will do whatever it takes to win, and they're generally clutch. They're particularly good at counterattacking at the moment, but expect them to switch it up whenever the situation calls for it.
Weaknesses: The squad still has some trouble gelling together, since they really overhauled their previously-quite-old squad. As a result, the players show sign of not quite understanding each other - most of the time, it's the foreigners having trouble adapting to the Farves being Farves. This miscommunication can be fatal at times.
Best Players: While many were very worried signing a goalkeeper from Zwangzug would mean going literally goalkeeperless, this has proven to be very far from the case. Paige Daunten is arguably the best player in the team. However, don't sleep on the pacey, young and fiery Emiliano Gallegas, or the humongous Vyacehslav Khavarin.
Young Prospects: It's hard to look past Emiliano Gallegas here. The winger looks set to be a world beater one day, and is already getting capped for the national team. Pacey, passionate and quite technical, as well as decently clinical. La Nueva Avenida truly have a gem here.
Prediction: We're going to be controversial here. We think they've gone too gung-ho with their squad overhaul, and they'll finish 5th as a result. We do think this prediction may come back to bite us in the ass, though.

Dí Maozöxê

Manager: Blâás Âgínsôgnó
Nickname: lôs Rébélés
Home Stadium: Rülândéá Çölíséá (35,000)
Home City: Ruland, Ruland

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Íüé Tgô -LB-

Xíxì Jóf -CB-

Mohammed Saleem -CB-

Yülàáê Hösiré -RB-

Têrçêr Ànáxímane -CM-

Alkrÿ Bren -CM-

Keaton Durbridge -TK-

Çè Löjámangó -LW-

Sâcras Dü Sêr -RW-

Çês Rêó -ST-

Kâyetá Serö

Bench: aGKa

Jâáko Kâíxìró aGKa

Émérí Dü Sêr aLBa

Lís Rüg aCBa

Spïr Tör aCBa

Ôrelí Târâjâs aRBa

Jôsüé Lâ Léspér aDMa

Xíriêrín Wísnèvüs aCMa

Râúl Êçar aTKa

Lèón Dr Sêlvüâr aLWa

Sâlömão Ôsgân aRWa

Türó Kögánk aSTa

Joanna McGidden

Background: The second biggest club in Ruland in terms of success, and the one with the biggest fanbase, though Mâ Âlâmëómë fans would never admit it. Dí Maozöxê is a club founded by uranium miners, which means they have a massive following in all of Ruland, especially in the capital. Their fans are some of the most passionate and violent in the country. Though they lean heavily left, as does most of the state nowadays, they lean more towards chaos than anything else. Their rivals are Mâ Âlâmëómë, and their clashes always end up with people injured. They also have a huge enmity with, well, the rest of the league, much like their rivals. Being Rulandese and successful will tend to do that.
State League Performance: Not even managing second is a huge blow, but they were arguably better than Lâ Lüs, so it's a mixed bag.
Strengths: Their defense is still the best in the league, despite having sold a Farf NTer in Drì Lsôs. Mohammed Saleem is a bit of an unknown quantity, but the club insists Lsôs will not be missed, and who are we not to trust them? Nonetheless, this really is the best defense in the league, and the stats back it up. It's kind of funny, since in the past lôs Rébélés were known for being a bit too attack-oriented for the league (yes, really).
Weaknesses: They've alleviated their lack of depth, but it's still there. What's more, some of their players are loose cannons, and get themselves suspended over the most stupid shit. Expect them to leave you wondering if they'd have won some matches where they lacked X or Y key player.
Best Players: Íüé Tgô, first and foremost. He will never have to pay for a beer again in Farfadillis after that World Cup final, but he's also just that good when playing for his boyhood club. Besides him, Keaton Durbridge is expected to lead the midfield alongside takilante Çè Löjámangó. He's a starter for the Delaclava NT, so he must be up to the task. Emphasis on the must, since he plays for a Rulandese club with truly fanatical support.
Young Prospects: Çè Löjámangó already has a few caps under his name, and is currently the best takilante in the league, after Faragó rue Cazade's long-awaited departure. Têrçêr Ànáxímane is a somewhat unknown rightback who had trouble breaking into the squad, but has made up for that by going straight into the starting eleven thanks to his impeccable dribbling, crossing and defending. Alkrÿ Bren is also supposedly talented (and only nineteen), but it is rumored he only got signed because the league lacked Mrii players.
Prediction: Great team, they've got good chances of going all the way, even though they rarely ever seem to actually do that. We'll go with 4th place, but it's up in the air.

Avenida Leal

Manager: Constantino Martínez
Nickname: los Leales
Home Stadium: Lealtad y Fuerza (30,000)
Home City: Victoria Lago, Puerto Farolero

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Noé Perea -LB-

Shoji Suzukaze -CB-

Trinidad Arochi -RB-

Leonardo Orellana -DM-

Simón Franco -CM-

Mark Anderson -CM-

Travis Grimaldi -CM-

Næmor Paala -LW-

Abel Terrazas -RW-

José Córdova -ST-

Nevaeh Cathar

Bench: aGKa

Joel Irizarry aGKa

Óscar Castro aLBa

Esteban Ojeda aCBa

Armando Villaseñor aRBa

David Luján aDMa

Tobías Santacruz aCMa

Julián Rodríquez aCMa

Adán Ávila aLWa

Julio Cornejo aOMa

Matías Marín aRWa

Lorenzo Cruz aSTa

Suaham Ararina

Background: Though Avenida Leal arrived comparatively late to the whole successful Avenida thing, they're nowadays undeniably the second best one historically, and some might argue the best one at the moment. They're a club of working class roots, much like La Nueva Avenida. In this case, they're heavily tied to the wood industry. This rather bizarrely puts them at odds with the rest of the Avenidas which, while more right-leaning, are much more environmental, going so far as to have their shared stadium in the forest. Silly chants about deforestation ensue. While the relationship between the Avenidas is bizarre, Avenida Leal can boast the title of "not very hated outside their home state", thanks to their many charitative efforts during times of crisis.
State League Performance: Yes, they won the state league, and they were arguably the best team this time around as well. But they needed help from La Nueva Avenida for that. We'll call it a good-but-not-great performance.
Strengths: Two decades managing the club mean that Constantino knows exactly what he needs the players to do to fit his vision. As a result, despite the many signings the club made, the team seems to be gelling together nicely. They've got a great defense, not because of individual quality but because it's well-drilled, and a talented if slightly unproven midfield, as well as Nevaeh Cathar (she's back!) up front. Their strength is basically almost everything, basically.
Weaknesses: They don't have actual weaknesses. They have some things they could improve on, but they're the most solid team across the board. I've spent an hour trying to come up with some bullshit like their pressing being tiring for them or something but I'm really coming up short.
Best Players: Nevaeh Cathar may not be as good as when she was outscoring everyone here, but neither is the league! So yeah, she'll terorize defenses. Like, absolutely terrorize them. The fans are ecstatic to have her back. There's also Noé Perea, who's a great goalkeeper and arguably a World Cup winner.
Young Prospects: Næmor Paala and Travis Grimaldi are young and starting, so watch out for them. Paala appears to have taken like a duck to water (no goat puns today, sorry) in this league, with eye-catching playmaking and lethargy in defense. Grimaldi is every bit as fast as your average Farf winger, but also considerably more technical. Finally, there's also Suaham Ararina, who's a bit too young to be starting yet, but many say could actually break into the starting eleven soon. We'll have to wait and see.
Prediction: This is a great team, but we'll have to go with 3rd place. If they win, though, it would be wholly unsurprising.

Mâ Âlâmëómë

Manager: Drì Kâíxìró
Nickname: lôs Vhêrdês
Home Stadium: Rülândéá Çölíséá (35,000)
Home City: Ruland, Ruland

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Lídôr Wôsó -LB-

Drö Yorópëlrío -CB-

Alarabi Labeaga -RB-

Kândé Lütéré -DM-

Ôlégà Atsé -CM-

Ígnîgo Çí Xôrí -CM-

Zsolgar Zsase -LW-

Lavanya Naqvi -OM-

Dîmás Ósîn -RW-

Rêgül Dörngâo -ST-

Edmün Çídh

Bench: aGKa

Drö Âloré aGKa

Bâjâ Töxól aLBa

Gëngêçío Quîrijá aCBa

Gëngüdó Pìgulôçô aRBa

Rímân Dòrrò aDMa

Rüí Xühî aCMa

Râúl Nógíngo aCMa

Éskïr Òmâgrûtá aLWa

Çüs Aluansöó aOMa

Çè Êréçênsér aRWa

Lôrénsé Çêmîjìo aSTa

Horâsio Wôndôji

Background: The most decorated club in Farfadillis, and it's not even close. Almost twice as many league titles as their next competitor (La Nueva Avenida), and the team that has historically had the best squads. Long gone are the days of Mêndêlöíndçêl, Einarsson, Kâí, Etezadi, Aurora, Wínrôuge, Rainsford, Gosforth, Campbell, Zubiri, Shrike, Tzâín, Röènôùjýâ, Na'Kale, Söh, Wçêíl, Killanen, Soria Luna... you get the point. They've had some insane squads over the years. They've still got one of the most fearsome squads in the league, even if it's not the entire Multiverse trembling now. Their fans? Only a little less violent than Dí Maozöxê's, generally adherent to a pagan religion that venerates Mâ Âlâmëómë - roughly translated as Mother Earth. They don't like the whole uranium mining thing. And yes, of course they have revolutionary sympathies, like everyone else in Ruland.
State League Performance: They won the league, reclaiming the "best team in Ruland" title which Lâ Lús had very, very, very arguably taken from them.
Strengths: Good fucking luck trying to beat them if you don't play wide. Their entire spine is filled with some of the best players in the league, which is not to say they've not got some impressive players on the flanks. They've got one of their historical strengths: some of the best players in the league playing in almost every. Single. Position.
Weaknesses: Just like last season, their fullbacks and goalkeeper are not quite Mâ Âlâmëómë material. They're good enough to play for, say, Ausharmuj Marusi, though. Besides that, their other weakness is that every team wants to beat them and badly, save perhaps for Rülândéá Kôstä, so every single team turns up for their games against them. Cry me a river, Mâ Âlâmëómë.
Best Players: Zsolgar Zsase will control most games by himself, and score a couple of headers to boot. Çídh will score a lot. Ígnîgo Çí Xôrí is slowly becoming better than Zsase at everything, and is nowadays a starter for the national team. Lavanya Naqvi will terrorize every right back in the league. The Confederates say she hangs onto the ball too much, but over here we call that talent.
Young Prospects: Astrogoths tend to do well in the FFL, that much is not a secret. Alarabi Labeaga seems likely to join the liked of Bayarte Pagagartundua and Ostadar Arambilet in that regard. The centerback is tall, fast and technical enough to fit in. He is also the kind of guy you don't wanna piss off. "Pasa la pelota o pasa el jugador, pero no los dos" is how the Faroleran saying goes. Also, half the bench is still filled with potential world beaters, just refer to last season's not-quite-preview-not-quite-review to read about that.
Prediction: This is a fantastic team by the league's standards. But they're up against a team that's coming off two titles in a row, so 2nd place is the best we can do here.

René Skaé

Manager: Louis-Étienne Hevesi
Nickname: les Ezrenels
Home Stadium: Grand René Skaé (25,000)
Home City: René Skaé, Szoirsia

Predicted Starting XI: -GK-

Berény Phelede -LB-

Camille Auguste -CB-

Ljuba Buczvarov -CB-

Nadezhda Odling -RB-

Darijen Vesele -CM-

Pickering Sionne -CM-

Lőrensz Ziczi -TK-

Archard Ezaa Robé -LW-

Lajos Éwanjé-Épée -OM-

Tulaki Rauogba -RW-

Elemér Miross-Lezocz

Bench: aGKa

Géza Gaudin aGKa

Alfred Molka aLBa

Adhemar Amölsnoschin aCBa

Denis Szibóth aCBa

Béla Yannick aRBa

Botond Zsabados aLMa

Albert Bauhin aCMa

András Zsabados aRMa

Boldizsár Barrande aTKa

Jenő Jéreus aSTa

Boldizsár Coûteaux aSTa

Yves Kiss

Background: Ever since René Skaé got promoted to the FFL, Szoirsian football has slowly and very steadily risen through the ranks. First they produced NT caliber players like Zsolgar Zsase, Kósa Bajnok and, most famously, Lázár Eleonóra. Then, René Skaé started climbing the ranks. Now, they're incumbent back-to-back champions. Off-the-pitch, René Skaé is quite the sensation in Szoirsia, with most anyone supporting the club. They're the second most left-leaning state, so their fans naturally lean that way as well. Their fans are remarkably mild, perhaps owing to the temperatures of their state, which is 90% a huge fucking desert where things you didn't know could melt do melt.
State League Performance: They dropped two points.
Strengths: What happens to a team once they win two titles in a row? They become complacent. René Skaé appear to not have gotten the fucking memo, though. Look at the players they've bought. They've lost their best ever player and their squad still looks every bit as scary! They make it really hard to pick a strength here. They've gone full Mâ Âlâmëómë. So yeah, their strength is being better at football.
Weaknesses: We're grasping at straws here but their bench is not quite as good as Mâ Âlâmëómë's, which could prove troublesome maybe. Yeah, I've got nothing. Some teams even roll over to them because they despise the other top teams.
Best Players: Elemér Miross-Lezocz and Béreny Phelede are club heroes and NT players (arguably). But I'll tell you a little secret: it is Darijen Vesele, Tulaki Rauogba and Lőrensz Ziczi you should look out for. The Siovanijan (or Teus? I should look into that) is a very complete wingback that puts every Farf wingback not named Ezequiel Marchiondo to shame, and Marchiondo does not play in this league. Ziczi may be very young, but it's a clear case on if and not when he'll become a world beater, and he's looking sharper by the day. The same goes for Rauogba
Young Prospects: Besides Rauogba and Ziczi, the rest of the midfield (no, seriously, all three players) is also very good, young and promising. They're title contenders now, just you wait till these guys hit their prime. Well, if they stay around, that is.
Prediction: 1st. Maybe 2nd, but probably 1st. This is a team with great chemistry, lots of great players and huge home advantage. It's hard to look past that.

by **Farfadillis** » Sat Jul 11, 2020 6:29 pm

Nufro was way in over his head. Rëvôlüsìn this, rëvôlüsìn that. Whatever this rëvôlüsìn was, it seemed to be the only thing his teammates seemed to worry about off the pitch. It didn't help that they only seemed to talk about it when they switched back to Rulandese. He felt very left out.

"Dale, Nufro, pasá una pelota por lo menos!" His native language; music to his years. Mâáx was not being friendly with him, but at least now he understood that he had to pass the ball more often (to be more precise: at least once). And so he did. "La **** que te parióóóó!" Mâáx hollered. Ah, a missed pass. Yeah, he'd really botched that one.

Darijen Vesele went on to intercept the pass, run down the flank, and find Rauogba's head with a very precise cross. René Skaé were now winning 5-0.

It was moments like this one that made him think that, when putting things in perspective, running away from home to pursue a simpler life as a Rulandese fisherman might have been a little too out there. But no matter, five goals is not an insurmountable difference.

In reality, Nufro was quite bad at pitxi. Not bad, bad. He'd played in his youth and could even be considered very good for Sunday league football. He might even have been able to hold his own in midfield playing semipro football in some developed nation. But he wasn't quite Farf top-flight quality. Except, of course, for the fact that he always seemed to score out of nowhere. He'd already won the team a few games with the odd lucky rebound or top bins thundercunting of the ball.

t'Ômixés took the corner kick. Alxìkì rose above everyone and headed it toward the far post. Phelede managed to almost tip it over; it crashed into the crossbar and bounced back towards an incoming Quîrijá, who unleashed a rocket of a shot. It hit Nufro straight in the face, then bounced off straight into the post, before hitting his face again, before hitting the post again, before hitting his face again, before going in. 5-1. Seventh goal of the season for the midfielder.

Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ

"You know, Lemuel, you were fantastic out there today." Emilio passed him a bottle of vodka. "Really makes me wonder what the hell you're doing here, man."

The others either nodded, gesticulated or voiced their agreement. Having a goalkeeper of his caliber felt a little surreal for most players on the team.

"Thanks, Emi." Lemuel looked at his vodka hesitantly. "Are you guys sure this is how we should unwind? Doesn't seem very professional."

"That's how we do things here. Besides we've earned it - shut up Óliver I know we're thirteenth, all the more reason to unwind - but yeah, we've earned it. Not everyone can beat Dí Maozöxê!" He raised his glass. "To Lemuel!"

"To Lemuel!" They all responded in unison. Except Lemuel, of course.

Orlando, now a little more pushy thanks to having just downed a glass of vodka, picked up where Emilio left off. "Nah but seriously Lemu, why're you here? I mean, don't get me wrong, we love having you in goal but the last thing I'd do if I were a foreigner is come here."

Lemuel smiled, proudly. "You see, the thing is, I'm actually one-sixteenth Faroleran." Everyone raised a collective, figurative eyebrow.

Emilio was the one to bite. "How come?"

"My mother's mother's father's father was Faroleran. There's a sizeable Farf diaspora in Banija, you know. Anyway, I'd always wanted to reconnect with my routes. You know, live in Farolera for a few years, drink some vodka with the lads, wear overly-saturated colors, commit moderate amounts of arson. Typical Faroleran stuff."

Before anyone else could chime in, Joel spoke up. "Very interesting Lemu. If that's the case, you should try some vodka loca."

"Vodka loca?"

"Yeah, it's vodka but with a twist. Perhaps the traditional Faroleran drink. You just ask the bar to pour the leftover grease from the frying the fries on your vodka."

Lemu winced. "You sure about that?"

"Of course. Let me get you one." Ramón, who knew the owner, turned around and went towards the kitchen.

"Lemu, Lemu. Tell us about your Faroleran grampa, Lemu!" Orlando was quite insistent.

"Uh, great-great-grandfather. Tatarabuelo, if you will. I never got to meet him. I only know his name."

"Oh, do tell us. We might just call you that!"

"Uh... I think it was... Elbo Ludo?"

As the Farolerans looked at each other and burst out laughing, Ramón arrived with a glass of vodka loca.

"What'd I miss?" He asked, while handing Lemuel his glass of almost literally poison.

"Lemu was telling us that his gramps' name was Elbo Ludo. We were thinking of nicknaming him that. Whatcha think, Lemu?"

"Wait, el boludo? You sure about tha-" As he turned around, he saw Lemuel downing the vodka loca in one swing, then doing his best to not vomit. To his credit, he somehow succeeded. "Yeah, el boludo fits perfectly." He raised his glass of normal vodka. "To El Boludo!"

Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ

Jaime was not a fan of La Querida. He'd always supported one of those irrelevant local Sunday league teams. La Querida seemed like a soulless club to him. Unite Pacifista? What for? Alas, fate had dealt him the cruelest of hands: his son had turned out to be a fucking plastic.

Heading towards the stadium, with his son on his shoulders, he could hear him chant the same thing over and over. "Salayeta, Salayeta, Salayeta." He swayed as he chanted this. Not really creative, but you can't ask much from a five-year-old.

A game between Interluz and La Querida. Jaime justifiably didn't expect any good football. He bumped into a few acquaintances on his way to the stands. This, of course, prompted him to ask himself why everyone in his city seemed to be a fucking plastic these days.

The game was surprisingly entertaining. Interluz's brand of fuck-you football did not pay off as they got a player sent off in the tenth minute for almost (so, not even) breaking Ezequiel Ortega's leg. As a result, La Querida started to dominate.

His beloved son, now sat by his side, just wouldn't stop chanting Salayeta's name. No amount of "Cerrá el orto, nene"s appeared to quell his enthusiasm. Nonetheless, the complaints subsided quickly as Salayeta scored the first goal of the game. A powerful header, well beyond the reach of Fonseca's reach.

"Salayeta. Salayeta. Salayeta." The crowd joined his son, unknowingly. This, obviously, only spurred him on.

His son went on for thirty minutes, all of half time, and another twenty for good measure, before Salayeta bagged his second goal of the night. A beautifully-taken free kick, product of a borderline criminal tackle from Delgado that somehow only warranted a stern warning. Jaimecito was ecstatic; Jaime not so much.

As the match was coming to an end, Salayeta scored a third. A swift counterattack that ended with Segura generously passing the ball to him for a tap-in. The crowd went wild. The Astograthian had by now captivated the entire city.

Jaime turned towards his son. He looked at him, chanting still, happier than ever. For a brief moment, he could appreciate what La Querida was bringing to the city. Some much-needed happiness for his son. A relief from the bleakness of the Farf day-to-day. Too bad this didn't make his son any less of a fucking plastic.

Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ

With a delicate chip, Rauogba scored the winner in the very last minute. René Skaé one, La Querida nil. They'd fought very hard for a third straight title, and it was now reasonably within grasp. They only needed Mâ Âlâmëómë to lose. A tie would force a final between the two.

The team gathered together to listen to turn on the faulty radio, and after some static, listened to the final minutes of the Mâ Âlâmëómë Fryi Frêndê match.

"GOOOOOOOOOOOOOL! Fryi Frêndê! That's three goals from the Lions in the last few minutes! Incredible! This match will be remembered for many years!"

Everyone leaned in to hear better. Was this it? Had they managed a third title in a row?

"And the match comes to an end! What an incredible game of football! No less than eighteen goals scored. Now that's rare!"

Then the radio's battery died.

by **Farfadillis** » Sat Jul 11, 2020 6:33 pm

-                         Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Mâ Âlâmëomë             21   15   4   2   107   33  +74    49 Champions
 2 René Skaé               21   15   2   4    87   30  +57    47 CL
 3 Dí Maozöxê              21   13   4   4    64   34  +30    43 ChC
 4 Avenida Leal            21   11   7   3    75   41  +34    40 ChC
 5 Lâ Lüs                  21   11   5   5    58   36  +22    38 ChC
 6 Rülândéá Kôstä          21   10   6   5    76   57  +19    36
 7 Gorfalle Town           21   11   3   7    60   45  +15    36
 8 La Querida              21    9   5   7    53   46   +7    32
 9 Avenida Victoria        21    8   7   6    47   38   +9    31
10 Ausharmuj Marusi        21    9   4   8    55   50   +5    31
11 Avenida Principal       21    9   4   8    39   43   −4    31
12 Frion Libertas          21    7   5   9    38   47   −9    26
13 La Nueva Avenida        21    7   4  10    47   48   −1    25
14 Interluz                21    7   4  10    34   47  −13    25
15 Flamagua                21    7   3  11    47   58  −11    24
16 Sent 01                 21    5   7   9    43   61  −18    22
17 Prostran I Forzuda      21    6   4  11    48   77  −29    22
18 Ñandfe                  21    6   3  12    25   63  −38    21
19 Fryi Frêndê             21    5   5  11    40   80  −40    20
20 Tifón de la Costa       21    5   4  12    29   59  −30    19
21 Lasupi                  21    3   6  12    20   58  −38    15
22 Flying Jellyfish        21    2   4  15    25   66  −41    10

by **Farfadillis** » Thu Sep 03, 2020 3:22 pm

The Kamikaze

A site dedicated to Farf football
Domestic Football Section
FFFF Announces "Great Purge"
submitted just now

The FFFF shocked the entire country today by announcing the following: this season, the FFL will go down from 22 teams to... 10. Yes. Just 10. We don't know exactly what has gotten into the FFFF's head this time, but this has the potential to be absolutely attrocious for Farf football.

The insensitively-baptized "Great Purge" will work as follows:

The state leagues will get played at a neutral venue on the off-season and the following spots will be assigned to teams from each league:

Ferdullaele gets one automatic spot and three play-off spots
Farolera gets two automatic spots and two play-off spots
Szoirsia gets one automatic spot and one play-off spot
Ruland gets two automatic spots and two play-off spots
Kruvis gets two play-off spots
Fröndt gets three play-off spots
Tanazza gets one play-off spot
Induja gets one play-off spot
Pacifista gets one pay-off spot

The play-offs will determine a further four teams that will qualify to the FFL. The only further details the FFFF gave were the following: "buckled up, bitches".

I am livid.

by **Farfadillis** » Sat Sep 05, 2020 1:11 pm

Ferdullaelan League Standings

-  Team                  P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Ausharmuj Marusi      9  7  1  1  49  15  +34  22 FFL
 2 Fryi Frêndê           9  7  1  1  31  14  +17  22 FFL Play-offs
 3 Ferdullaele           9  7  1  1  28  13  +15  22 FFL Play-offs
 4 Sent 01               9  5  0  4  33  24   +9  15 FFL Play-offs
 5 Ñandfe                9  5  0  4  21  20   +1  15
 6 Gorfalle Town         9  4  0  5  25  23   +2  12
 7 Lasupi                9  3  2  4  20  27   -7  11
 8 Deportí Agaumi        9  2  1  6  17  33  -16   7
 9 Madorre de Fuego      9  1  1  7   9  37  -28   4
10 Fragardallians        9  0  1  8   8  35  -27   1

The Ferdullaelan state league was remarkably exciting this year, with Ausharmuj Marusi only barely edging both Fryi Frêndê and Ferdullaele on goal difference. They did very much deserve the title, though, as their goal difference can attest. Raom and Ouattara formed a deadly partnership up front which was far too much for the rest of the league. By far the most remarkable thing about this season, though, is that Gorfalle Town finished sixth, when they were expected to win the title. Back to the drawing board for the Gorfallans.

Faroleran League Standings

-  Team                   P  W D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Avenida Leal           9  8 1  0  50   8  +42  25 FFL
 2 Avenida Principal      9  8 1  0  34   7  +27  25 FFL
 3 La Nueva Avenida       9  7 0  2  32  16  +16  21 FFL Play-offs
 4 Avenida Victoria       9  6 0  3  37  22  +15  18 FFL Play-offs
 5 Tifón de la Costa      9  5 0  4  16  17   -1  15
 6 Interluz               9  4 0  5  24  27   -3  12
 7 Gran Faro 70           9  3 0  6  10  30  -20   9
 8 Flamagua               9  2 0  7  12  36  -24   6
 9 Defensor de Gâràý      9  1 0  8   8  33  -25   3
10 Eterna                 9  0 0  9   8  35  -27   0

We all thought the FFFF was far too harsh to assign so few spots to the Farolerans, but it is what it is. Avenida Leal and, rather surprisingly, Avenida Principal were the best teams, and deservedly make the FFL this season. Avenida Leal were truly a force to be reckoned with, and would've won all nine games were it not for profoundly bad luck against Avenida Principal. Notably, every team won against all teams below them in the table (with the one Avenida Leal vs Avenida Principal exception), which means this league table is about as fair as it can get. Flamagua's Cayo Punta leaving them for presumably much less green pastures in Græntfjall (in the literal sense) has had much more of an impact than we expected. Sucks for them.

Rulandese League Standings

-  Team                  P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Rülândéá Kôstä        9  8  0  1  43   9  +34  24 FFL
 2 Mâ Âlâmëómë           9  7  0  2  59  16  +43  21 FFL
 3 Dí Maozöxê            9  7  0  2  31   9  +22  21 FFL Play-offs
 4 Lâ Lüs                9  6  0  3  36  18  +18  18 FFL Play-offs
 5 Dô Fäéýkô             9  3  2  4  21  25   -4  11
 6 Mí Ní Sí              9  3  2  4  22  27   -5  11
 7 Xârëgs d'Îrrî         9  3  2  4  15  33  -18  11
 8 Éspéráns dí Dögá      9  2  1  6  18  49  -31   7
 9 Vüstersgâés           9  1  1  7   7  41  -34   4
10 Mönérés Rôs           9  0  2  7   8  33  -25   2

Another league that got too few spots. In fairness, the top four are the only genuinely good teams in this league, so if Dí Maozöxê and Lâ Lüs escape the play-offs, it's probably fine. However, the notable thing about this season is that Rülândéá Kôstä won the league, only losing against Lâ Lüs and beating everyone else. Their recruitment has been top-notch the last few seasons, as more and more of their players get capped and continue their development. Mâ Âlâmëómë will have to step up if they plan to win the league, clearly.

Szoirsian League Standings

-  Team                      P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 René Skaé                 9  7  2  0  50   5  +45  23 FFL
 2 Torre del Viento          9  7  0  2  44  19  +25  21 FFL Play-offs
 3 Ezse                      9  5  1  3  28  27   +1  16
 4 Incendié Szoirsais        9  5  0  4  37  24  +13  15
 5 Rákospalotai              9  4  2  3  33  25   +8  14
 6 La Brecha                 9  4  2  3  19  13   +6  14
 7 Interszoi                 9  4  0  5  20  23   -3  12
 8 Gimnastique Szoirsia      9  4  0  5  15  18   -3  12
 9 Ardoint Spirité           9  1  1  7  11  59  -48   4
10 Kovic-Ovalski             9  0  0  9   4  48  -44   0

The big surprise here is that René Skaé tied two games and actually risked losing the title in the final matchday against Torrhe del Viento... but they smashed them 5-0 so there's that. Nothing interesting to see here: the very good team finished first, the only other decent team finished second, and the rest weren't even close.

Frionite League Standings

-  Team                       P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Flying Jellyfish           9  6  0  3  37  16  +21  18 FFL Play-offs
 2 Dor Frío                   9  6  0  3  31  17  +14  18 FFL Play-offs
 3 Isky Novara                9  5  0  4  22  22   +0  15 FFL Play-offs
 4 Koloko                     9  5  0  4  22  23   -1  15
 5 Frion Libertas             9  4  2  3  23  12  +11  14
 6 Deportí Flaé               9  4  1  4  13  23  -10  13
 7 Atletí Ledved              9  3  2  4  16  22   -6  11
 8 Duyrmyta Fau               9  3  1  5  22  32  -10  10
 9 Friguista Farfa            9  2  2  5  18  24   -6   8
10 Feardallis' Wanderers      9  2  2  5  11  24  -13   8

Koloko came agonizingly close to reverting an almost insurmountable goal difference disadvantage in the final matchday, but it was not meant to be. Beyond that, it comes as a shock that Frion Libertas didn't manage to finish in the top three, considering they finished twelfth in the league last season. We'll see how these teams far in the play-offs but, judging from the quality of football they displayed, they're likely to have a tough time.

Indujan League Standings

-  Team                       P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Ravasha                    9  8  1  0  34   8  +26  25 FFL Play-offs
 2 Racing de Induja           9  6  1  2  23  15   +8  19
 3 Kalistí                    9  4  2  3  17  15   +2  14
 4 Huracán de Seter           9  4  0  5  27  22   +5  12
 5 Ferrocarril                9  3  3  3  18  18   +0  12
 6 Gre Gran Chacó             9  4  0  5  15  23   -8  12
 7 Lounoi Gandu-Garay         9  3  2  4  19  20   -1  11
 8 Geyinstanles United        9  3  2  4  19  23   -4  11
 9 Induja Wanderers           9  2  1  6   9  27  -18   7
10 Errekochoa Supernovas      9  2  0  7  17  27  -10   6

What do we even care about this league, really? Ravasha were far and away the best team, and they are gonna get absolutely smashed the second they come across a decent team in the play-offs.

Karuvan League Standings

-  Team                     P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Vetar Trg                9  7  1  1  27  13  +14  22 FFL Play-offs
 2 Prostran I Forzuda       9  7  0  2  34  13  +21  21 FFL Play-offs
 3 Miograd                  9  6  0  3  30  15  +15  18
 4 Zestoka                  9  5  1  3  23  14   +9  16
 5 Rivijera                 9  4  2  3  15  17   -2  14
 6 Karuvis Milajonovic      9  4  1  4  12  10   +2  13
 7 Illyvich Farols          9  4  1  4  16  23   -7  13
 8 Young Boys               9  2  2  5  11  23  -12   8
 9 Old Boys                 9  1  0  8  14  24  -10   3
10 Starroja Nuanzovic       9  1  0  8  13  43  -30   3

The two best teams finished level on points, Vetar Trg barely edging Prostran I Forzuda on goal difference. It hardly matters however - beyond the bragging rights, I guess - because they're probably both losing in the play-offs, unless they get a very forgiving draw.

Giotomalepan League Standings

-  Team                   P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Giotomalepá Gots       9  6  3  0  32   5  +27  21 FFL Play-offs
 2 Giotomalepá Azul       9  5  2  2  21  14   +7  17
 3 Semota dal Fesé        9  5  1  3  18  15   +3  16
 4 Argonna Diguarâ        9  3  4  2  23  17   +6  13
 5 Darfallá Vherdes       9  4  1  4  18  16   +2  13
 6 Racing Ní-Rakem        9  4  1  4  19  21   -2  13
 7 Giotomalepá Falla      9  3  3  3  13  17   -4  12
 8 Fer-Fen                9  3  0  6  15  23   -8   9
 9 Mintan Mollomote       9  1  3  5  14  26  -12   6
10 Montesol Grande        9  1  2  6  10  29  -19   5

A considerably competitive league, but unfortunately one wholly lacking in quality. Giotomalepá Gots don't stand a chance even if the draw goes their way, in all likelihood.

Pacifistan League Standings

-  Team                            P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 La Querida                      9  6  2  1  28  14  +14  20 FFL Play-offs
 2 Primera, Segunda y Tercera      9  6  0  3  15   8   +7  18
 3 Los Nudos                       9  5  1  3  27  12  +15  16
 4 Los Gallos                      9  5  1  3  24  20   +4  16
 5 Racing Pacifista                9  4  3  2  20  20   +0  15
 6 La Armonía                      9  3  4  2  15  12   +3  13
 7 Juventud de Candilo             9  3  2  4  16  24   -8  11
 8 La Pacifista                    9  2  2  5  12  26  -14   8
 9 Asociación Pacifista            9  0  5  4  10  18   -8   5
10 Marineros de Neveria            9  1  0  8  10  23  -13   3

La Querida have gotten us used to their sight in the FFL, finishing in an impressive eighth place last season. How on earth, then, did they need two injury-time Salayeta goals to win the Pacifistan league? Absolutely dreadful from a team with high aspirations. Don't expect to see them in the FFL this season; they haven't got what it takes. Also, yes, Los Gallos did thrash their first team seven to fucking one.

Play-offs

First Round

Dí Maozöxê 7-1 Torrhe del Viento
(Bren 11', Durbridge 25', 37' and 40', Chiliarch 61', Wísnèvüs 82', Ànáxímane 87' vs Töröz 56')
No surprises here. The game looked relatively even for the first twenty or so minutes, with Dí Maozöxê somewhat lucky to have found a goal through a good individual play by Alkrÿ Bren, but after that Keaton Durbridge took over the game and left the Szoirsians wondering what the hell had happened. Three goals and three assists, you just don't see that every day, not even here.

Fryi Frêndê 3-3 Sent 01 (4-3 AET)
(Green 22', 25' and 76', Matacostelas 114' vs Aixenxó 5', Litoralé 66', Farrháteré 82')
Joe Green is really, really carrying this team. He was the difference between Sent 01 thrashing los Lleiones and losing to them in extra time. Matacostelas did score that tap-in, though, so he didn't do everything himself... I guess. Very tough match against Dí Maozöxê up next.

La Nueva Avenida 3-0 Ferdullaele
(Oroso 55', De Zúñiga 77' and 79')
Some thirty or so seasons ago, this could've been a match that decided the title. Nowadays, it's not even a contest: La Nueva Avenida could've scored five more and nobody would've complained. Their strike partnership seem to finally be finding their rhythm.

Avenida Victoria 2-1 Isky Novara
(Exinia 24', Soria 42' vs Rofserg 90+2')
Avenida Victoria fans have reasons to be worried. They had trouble dispatching Isky Novara of all teams, and are about to face La Nueva Avenida for a berth in the FFL... yeah, that's a very tough draw. Suffice to say, they are not the favorites for that match.

Prostran I Forzuda 1-5 Flying Jellyfish
(Mrkonjic 17' vs Voskanyan 3', 7' and 9', Caprakan 46', Heyerdahl 66')
In the run-up to this game, most would've thought it would be an even affair. And it was, actually. If you ignore Voskanyan's hat trick within ten minuntes, that is. A truly bizarre game of football.

Lâ Lüs 9-2 Ravasha
(t'Ômixés 4', Xösá 10', Lâçâlanzoô 18', Quîrijá 33', Alxíkí 40', 61', 63' and 75', de Urueña 70' vs Lalá'Rruheré 85' and 89')
Yeah... I told you Ravasha would get smashed. Lâ Lüs looking strong; Flying Jellyfish fans are probably trembling. Nufro de Urueña's goal, scored with his testicles, must've at least provided some much-needed comic relief for those scouting their upcoming opposition.

Dor Frío 2-2 La Querida (2-2 AET, 2-4 PKs)
(Määttä 55', Moe 81' vs Segura 90+1', Salayeta 90+8')
La Querida may be playing dreadful football, but Margaret has smiled upon them nonetheless. La Nueva Avenida and Avenida Victoria facing each other for a spot in the FFL while one of Dor Frío, La Querida, Vetar Trg and Giotomalepá Gots is guaranteed to make it... yeah. Anyway, La Querida once again edge the game with two injury time goals. Fans must be wondering at this point if their luck is ever going to run out. Brilliant free kicks from Segura and Salayeta, though.

Vetar Trg 4-1 Giotomalepá Gots
(Jugovic 13', Aleksov 22' and 68', Jokic 82' vs Lbanaló 80')
An incredibly low-quality match where the less-bad team dominated. Ror Aleksov was the only half-decent player on the pitch. La Querida have really been handed this on a silver platter

Second Round

Dí Maozöxê 4-2 Fryi Frêndê
(Chiliarch 47', Bren 50', Durbridge 75', Hösiré 82' vs Green 22' and 59')
Fryi Frêndê ended up proving much tougher for Dí Maozöxê than most expected them to be. However, Durbridge was a man possesed once again, setting up Chiliarch and scoring the winner from outside the box. Joe Green couldn't carry his team to victory this time, and must be considering his options for the mid-season transfer window, because he really should be playing in a better team. The same could arguably go for Matt Hall, as it was really the rest of the defense that let the team down. Also, for the first time in history, Fryi Frêndê will not be playing in the FFL. The last man has fallen.

La Nueva Avenida 1-1 Avenida Victoria (4-1 AET)
(Oroso 10', Gallegas 95', 101' and 120+2' vs Mojica 77')
One for the history books, this one. Although in the run-up to the game the Novans were considered the better team, the Victorians really gave them a run for their money. New signing Ugós Oroso paid for his entire transfer fee by scoring that header in the tenth minute, which proved vital as Avenida Victoria actually (somewhat) dominated for the rest of regular time. Mojica equalized in the seventy-seventh minute. It was only in extra time, when a tired Victorian team had to face the wrath of the fresh legs of Emiliano Gallegas, that La Nueva Avenida finally came out on top.

Lâ Lüs 5-0 Flying Jellyfish
(Quîrijá 50', Alxíkí 57' and 85', t'Ômixés 73', Sârátêgí 80')
We all knew Flying Jellyfish were never going to stop Lâ Lüs, but a 5-0 might be a tad harsh. It was not undeserved, though. Alxíkí tore them apart completely.

La Querida 1-1 Vetar Trg (1-1 AET, 3-2 PKs)
(Salayeta 90+2' vs Cirkovic 85')
Aaaaand, while Avenida Victoria and Fryi Frêndê miss out on FFL qualification, La Querida make it after needing last minute equalizers for three matches in a row against Los Nudos, Dor Frío and Vetar Trg. Talk about scraping by. Congratulations to La Querida fans, but I hope you understand you're gonna get destroyed this season if you keep up this performances. Also, make Salayeta a statue already.

by **Farfadillis** » Mon Sep 07, 2020 6:31 pm

-Season 34-

Not-quite-preview-not-quite-review

La Querida
Nickname: los Encorvados (the Hunchbacks)
Derogatory nickname(s): club de plástico (plastic club)
Manager: Porfirio Seijas
Ground: Estadio Manolo Lapaz (8,000), located in Pacifista, Farolera
Major rivals: La Armonía (local), La Pacifista (local)
Major honours: 4 Pacifistan state league titles
Infrastructure: Ground ★ / Training facilities ★ / Youth system ★ / Youth recruitment ★
Fans' expectations: To have fun, to maybe not get thrashed by every team in the process
Pundits' prediction: 10th place
Seasons in the First Division: 4 of 36
Starting Lineup: aGKa Eduardo Villa aLBa Régulo Elizarraras aCBa Horazio Buriain aCBa Raul Hoyo aRBa Alexis Méndez aCMa Arturo Malave aCMa Mario Girón aLWa Lucián Galván aRWa Esteban Olvera aSTa Anartz Salayeta aSTa Mauricio Segura
Bench: aGKa Guillermo Vergara aGKa Emilio Naranjo aLBa Armando Marín aCBa Andrés Perea aCBa Noé Valverde aRBa Emilio Valdez aCMa Eduardo Olivas aCMa Nicolás Roybal aLWa Ezequiel Negrón aRWa Alan Jaramillo aSTa Plácido Pumarejo aSTa Ramiro Alvardez
Background: A very young club from what used to be the state of Pacifista, historically one of the worst states when it came to the quality of the football. Pacifista is now a part of Farolera, though, so maybe Pacifista will suddenly start producing better footballers. That's how it works. Anyway: the La Querida project was very simple on the outset: found a club that the whole city of Pacifista can support, and pour money into it until it works. It worked far better than anyone expected: the whole city has rallied behind them, elated at the prospect of long-term relevance in the Farf football scene. Unsurprisingly, they lack an identity beyond being from Pacifista and having been named after a grocery store. Older, more set-in-their-ways Pacifistans tend to look down on supporters of the team as plastics.
Notes: This team can only really aim to have fun this season. If they don't find shipping goals fun, they'll struggle to do that. The team's in a bad run of form, overly-reliant on a tall, strong but mediocre Astograthian striker that has the pace of a veteran (a war veteran) and, to add insult to injury, the FFL has been severely downsized and they've somehow still made it here. Now there aren't any even worse teams to finish below them. They'll be facing the crème de la crème. Remarkably, despite barely making it to the FFL, they have decided to not splash any cash, instead trusting their mostly-amateur players to do a decent enough job. Fryi Frêndê fans ust be asking themselves how they lost their record of always having been in the top flight only for a team like this to be in this preview. But hey, we underestimated them last time, and they finished 8th (rather miraculously, to be clear). Maybe they won't suck too much.

Ausharmuj Marusi
Nickname: la Sindica (the Syndicate)
Derogatory nickname(s): Bolosheviqués (Bolsheviks), les Mugrientés (the Grimy ones)
Manager: Ey Farrháteré
Ground: Multisportivé Joan Roaré (17,000), located in Bolanos, Ferdullaele
Major rivals: Ferdullaele (local and political)
Major honours: 1 Farf Freitball Ligá 2 title, 1 Ferdullaelan state league title
Infrastructure: Ground ★ / Training facilities ★ / Youth system ★ / Youth recruitment ★★★
Fans' expectations: Finish in the top... eight
Pundits' prediction: 9th place
Seasons in the First Division: 14 of 36
Starting Lineup: aGKa Giolehe Inflax aLBa Valdo Kímé aCBa Ecésar der Efer aRBa Soirelí der Reneska aCMa Liberté Salogadó aCMa Eslejes Aljojí aLWa Joaquim Martell aOMa Óstam Perda Raom aRWa Antu Ouattara aSTa Joe Green aSTa Pmoifue Jopar
Bench: aGKa Erazem Askanter aGKa Garrehemí Crenago aLBa Herrhemengaúl der Ezse aCBa Somuemundé Andaní aCBa Horacéi Xúrkaroá aRBa Kaé Fargá aCMa Madusmé Ukén aCMa Cicek Aga aLWa Nerianeknoé der Reneska aOMa Féipé Cronologó aRWa Samahuhe Axjos aSTa Kamara Mboge
Background: The only left-wing team in Ferdullaele, the wealthy capital state that had control over Farfadillis until only a decade ago. Why are they the only left-wing team? Because the team is still heavily associated with the syndicate that founded it, so they have by far the largest working-class fanbase outside Ruland. Left-wing as they may be, though, they're very much Ferdullaelan nationalists like almost all other teams in the capital (don't ask them why their roster features so many non-Ferdullaelans). So, basically, they're hated outside Ferdullaele for being xenophobes and hated inside Ferdullaele for being filthy commies. They relish this.
Notes: They had a tough time getting here, barely edging out the other Ferdullaelan teams, but they cannot be accused of complacency: as soon as their berth in the FFL was announced, they swooped up Joe Green from Fryi Frêndê and Pmoifue Jopar from Frion Libertas, promptly fixing their “Our strikers miss every chance” problem. Maguiliní Spoheí, starting striker of years past, has been unceremoniously shown the door: literally kicked out of training. Learn the lesson, kids: don't miss. They didn't limit themselves to vulturing unfortunate teams, though: they also signed Juvencus international Joaquim Martell. Now they have a surprisingly talented line-up with only a few, glaring weaknesses, namely half their defense and general lack of pace. Although they are the second-worst team in the league, if the players click, they could actually be roughly mid-table.

Avenida Principal
Nickname: los Caballeros (the Knights)
Derogatory nickname(s): la Tercera Avenida (the Third Avenue)
Manager: Federico Llorca
Ground: La Gran Avenida (60,000), located in Victoria Lago, Farolera
Major rivals: Avenida Leal (local and political), La Nueva Avenida (local), Avenida Victoria (local and political)
Major honours: 3 Farf Freitball Ligá titles, 1 Globe Cup title, 1 Atlantian Oceania Champions' League title, 1 Farf Freitball Ligá 2 title
Infrastructure: Ground ★ / Training facilities ★ / Youth system ★ / Youth recruitment ★★★
Fans' expectations: Finish roughly mid-table, maybe flirt with IFCF qualification
Pundits' prediction: 8th place
Seasons in the First Division: 32 of 36
Starting Lineup: aGKa Lemuel Bereket aLBa Abram Aguayo aCBa Ramón Gonzales aCBa Ezequiel Zayas aRBa Emilio Frondarina aCMa Lucián Saldivar aCMa Óliver Tijerina aTKa Alson Figueroa aLWa Alonzo de Anda aRWa Leandro Martelli aSTa Joel Cotto
Bench: aGKa Godofredo Armendez aGKa Alejandro Montes aLBa Lucas Valdés aCBa Celio Astol aCBa José Henríquez aRBa Rodrigo Terrazas aCMa Abraham Mondragón aCMa Adrián Fajardo aTKa Jorge Varela aLWa Andrés Valdez aRWa Celio Pompa aSTa Emiliano Barreto
Background: Avenida Principal is, you guessed it, one of the Avenidas. They are following in Avenida Victoria's footsteps: they've been in a clear downturn for about ten seasons now. Bizarrely, they're generally agreed to be the richest team in the country. In the past, they used to have the most foreigners in the league. Nowadays, well... they've had to change plans, and it hasn't helped them one bit. Politically, as the most affluent team in the nation, and having some of the most affluent fans outside Ferdullaele, you can guess where their loyalties lie...
Notes: Their only signing has been Ezequiel Zayas from Interluz who, while very promising, is perhaps a bit green to be trying to hold his own against teams like Mâ Âlâmëómë and René Skaé, especially when you consider the fullbacks are better suited to their day jobs. This team features an assortment of okay-but-not-good footballers, but they do understand each other well, and they do manage to play some exciting football, occasionally going blow-for-blow against opposition they have no business snatching points from. The three quality players they have are Bereket, Figueroa and Martelli, whose experience representing formidable national teams will come in clutch for los Caballeros - or so their fans hope. They're expected to finish eighth, but there's not much separating them from la Sindica; much like them, mid-table is something they might accomplish, but definitely don't count on it.

Lâ Lüs
Nickname: Rëvôlüsìnârs (Revolutionaries)
Derogatory nickname(s): Têrròrïstés (Terrorists)
Manager: Ülì Çôçô
Ground: Dês Käìds (4,000), located in Ômên, Rülândéá
Major rivals: None
Major honours: None
Infrastructure: Ground ★ / Training facilities ★ / Youth system ★ / Youth recruitment ★★★★
Fans' expectations: IFCF spots and promoting Rulandese independence are the two priorities
Pundits' prediction: 7th place
Seasons in the First Division: 4 of 36
Starting Lineup: aGKa Wilsrë Râsáás aLBa Lôrénsé Jâtíêsà aCBa Eoin Rutheford aCBa Lînó Xösá aRBa Mâáx Gôreýl aCMa Nufro de Urueña aCMa Blâás Sârátêgí aLWa Ríqué t'Ômixés aOMa Mâáx Lâçâlânzoô aRWa Tôsgo Alxíkí aSTa Çè Quîrijá
Bench: aGKa aGKa Trî Jíí aGKa Pâás Tûto aLBa Ôrelí Dü Sêr aCBa Jérôn Gínê aCBa Trî Gânö aRBa Tômâás Hrushór aCMa Lídôr Érêgê aCMa Bêlá Düjân aLWa Sàntîó Mêjor aOMa Mâxímö Sírspâl aRWa Émílíâno Símaurêné aSTa Váyárdö Jôùjárânneá
Background: One of the youngest clubs in the league, Lâ Lüs was founded about twenty years ago, when the Rulandese revolutionary movement was beginning to gain traction. They were founded by revolutionaries and their sympathizers, in the run-down city of Ômên, which is like Lìbêrêtê but a bit worse. All of Ômên has already rallied behind them, so their small stadium will be filled every game. Revolutionary fervor and border friction with Farolera will make for some very heated games against the Avenidas. Due to Rulandese infrastructure and administration being suboptimal, the city of Ômên has rarely produced FFL-quality footballers. This effectively means Lâ Lüs has a monopoly on a Rulandese city with untapped potential. Also, in case it was not clear enough, this is literally an armed faction of freedom fighters/terrorists (take your pick) fronting as a football club.
Notes: While the last few seasons saw their squad being constantly overhauled due to their constantly discovering new, exciting prospects they appear to have completely plateaud. This is still a very good squad, though. Considering how young it is, the fact that it is now one year older only plays to their advantage. New signing Eoin Rutheford will hopefully prove worth the small salary he's being paid; Lâ Lüs had a lot of defensive troubles in the state league. Nobody's quite sure why de Urueña's still a starter, except perhaps for his tendency to have unlikely events favor him. He's otherwise completely out of his depth. Alxíkí will be tearing apart defenses, but it's not clear if the rest of the team will be able to exploit that. Overall, a solid team, and one that will look scarier as the seasons go by, but they're too green at the moment.

Rülândéá Kôstä
Nickname: tâ Kôstä (those from the Coast)
Derogatory nickname(s): Mey Kôsâng (Little Brother, in reference to the two bigger Rulandese clubs), Pêskätörès (Fishermen)
Manager: Fêrm Égéré
Ground: Âréné Délékôstä (10,000), located in Lìbêrêtê, Rülândéá
Major rivals: None
Major honours: 3 Farf Torde Ligá titles, 1 Rulandese state league title
Infrastructure: Ground ★ / Training facilities ★ / Youth system ★ / Youth recruitment ★★★★
Fans' expectations: They just beat Mâ Âlâmëómë to the state league title, so they want to win the whole thing now... which is unrealistic
Pundits' prediction: 6th place
Seasons in the First Division: 10 of 36
Starting Lineup: -GK- Pär Tjova -LB- Pâb Bílísô -CB- Gëngüdó Pìgülôçô -RB- Lînó Çíwâ -CM- Erin Kang -CM- Baraxil Muhaburu -TK- Émérí Dü Ârusânìrá -LW- Merluxia van de Kraan -RW- Çè Sêwansé -ST- Wilsêkïl Lâlâw -ST- Röémün Çídh
Bench: aGKa Horâcio Mâ Mórsna aGKa Jê Êrgön aLBa Éskïr Lûoo aCBa Pâb Ýuó aRBa Vínseslâdís Nêxvêrsôlöká aCMa Mâánü Düsnans aCMa Kârl Víçâr aTKa Çìríkô Tlísnadâ aLWa Fonás Nêndêlögâö aRWa Valën Rónellsön aSTa Pâás Wí Tírâ aSTa Pâás Çélçôl
Background: Rülândéá Kôstä are massive in the Rulandese coast. When we say massive, we mean truly massive. Most everyone in the city's coast supports the team named after the city's coast which, to be fair, is not exactly shocking. Their supporters have very strong ties to the revolutionary movements of the last two decades, and are violent even by Rulandese standards. Their stadium, partially destroyed by bombings, will probably pack twice its capacity every game. Surprisingly, tâ Kôstä have a very friendly relationship with all other Rulandese clubs, seeing them more as family than rivals. Teams from outside Ruland, though? Well, that's a very different, much bloodier story...
Notes: When did Rülândéá Kôstä get this good? Of the professional teams, they're the only one besides René Skaé that has gotten better since the total collapse of society as we knew it. Their midfield is fearsome: a Québecois international, an Astograthian international, a Hinodejin international, the best takilante in the league and a young, pacey and energetic winger. Up front, Röémün Çídh has been capped for Farfadillis, while Wilsekïl Lâlâw broke into the first team this season and turned heads in the state league. In defense, Savojar Tjova is really tall and also possibly good, while they've also signed young prospect Gëngüdó Pìgülôçô from Mâ Âlâmëómë because he couldn't start ahead of Labeaga. He was fantastic in the state league. There's a lot of unproven potential in this team but, because of this, also a lot of potential. This team could leave our mouths agape.

by **Farfadillis** » Mon Sep 07, 2020 6:33 pm

Dí Maozöxê
Nickname: lôs Rébélés (the Rebels)
Derogatory nickname(s): Too many to count
Manager: Blâás Âgínsôgnó
Ground: Rülândéá Çölíséá (35,000), located in Lìbêrêtê, Rülândéá
Major rivals: Mâ Âlâmëómë (local)
Major honours: 2 Farf Freitball Ligá titles, 1 Atlantian Oceania Champions' League title, 1 Farf Freitball Ligá 2 title, 1 Farf Torde Ligá title
Infrastructure: Ground ★ / Training facilities ★ / Youth system ★ / Youth recruitment ★★★★★
Fans' expectations: Qualify for the Champions' League, beat Mâ Âlâmëómë for the bragging rights
Pundits' prediction: 5th place
Seasons in the First Division: 28 of 36
Starting Lineup: aGKa Íüé Tgô aLBa Xíxì Jóf aCBa Mohammed Saleem aCBa Yülàáê Hösiré aRBa Têrçêr Ànáxímane aCMa Alkrÿ Bren aCMa Xíriêrín Wísnèvüs aTKa Çè Löjámangó aLWa Sâkras Dü Sêr aRWa Keaton Durbridge aSTa Alois Chiliarch
Bench: aGKa Jâáko Kâíxìró aGKa Émérí Dü Sêr aLBa Lís Rüg aCBa Spïr Tör aCBa Ôrelí Târâjâs aRBa Jôsüé Lâ Léspér aCMa Drì Çôçô aCMa Râúl Êçar aTKa Lèón Dr Sêlvüâr aCMa Râúl Êçar aLWa Sâlömão Ôsgân aSTa Joanna McGidden
Background: The second-biggest club in Ruland in terms of success, and the one with the biggest fanbase, though Mâ Âlâmëómë fans would never admit it. Dí Maozöxê is a club founded by uranium miners, which means they have a massive following in all of Ruland, especially in the capital. That may sound like a non-sequitur but it really isn't. Their fans are some of the most passionate and violent in the country. Though they lean heavily left, as does most of Ruland nowadays, they lean more towards chaos than anything else. Their clashes with Mâ Âlâmëómë almsot always take a few people with them. They also have a huge enmity with, well, the rest of Farfadillis as a whole, much like their rivals. Being Rulandese and successful will tend to do that.
Notes: We've officially entered solid team territory. With Farf hero Íüé Tgô in goal, and a solid defense which includes NTer Têrçêr Ànáxímane, Dí Maozöxê have arguably the best defense in the league. On top of that, their midfield is very solid, including fringe Mrii international Alkrÿ Bren and a couple of promising young Farves... to say nothing of Delaclav star Keaton Durbridge, long-listed for the Galácticos and, along with Tgô, indisputably the star of this team. Up front, shiny new signing Alois Chiliarch may be on for the future for the Nepharim, but he's very much one for the present in a league like this. As a team, they play a possession-based style that makes it particularly hard for counterattack-based teams to score against them. They don't mind waiting and waiting to score, which is rare for a Farf team, and this sees them win games no other team could win. As all teams from here on out, they could definitely win the title, but the competition is fierce.

La Nueva Avenida
Nickname: los Novanos (the Novans; no, it doesn't really mean anything)
Derogatory nickname(s): Fachitos (little fascists)
Manager: Thjorgias Pickton
Ground: La Gran Avenida (60,000), located in Victoria Lago, Farolera
Major rivals: Avenida Victoria (local), Avenida Principal (local), Avenida Leal (local), Mâ Âlâmëómë (sporting)
Major honours: 7 Farf Freitball Ligá titles, 2 Atlantian Oceania Champions' League title, 1 Faroleran state league title
Infrastructure: Ground ★ / Training facilities ★ / Youth system ★ / Youth recruitment ★★★★
Fans' expectations: Win the title, but Champions' League qualification would leave them happy, even if they'd never admit it
Pundits' prediction: 4th place
Seasons in the First Division: 35 of 36
Starting Lineup: aGKa Paige Daunten aLBa Fabián Saiz aCBa Vyacheslav Khavarin aRBa Case Ruderby aDMa César Montemayor aCMa Fernand Way aCMa Loisé Aukland aLWa Emiliano Gallegas aRWa Gurielefre Aixenxó aSTa Ugós Oroso aSTa Salomón De Zúñiga
Bench: aGKa Orlando Bétancourt aGKa Benjamín Gaona aLBa David Guajardo aCBa Emanuel Altamirano aRBa Fabián Malave aDMa Furia de Jesús aCMa César Blanco aCMa Rafael Bueno aLWa Alfredo Luján aOMa Arturo Briseño aRWa Fulgencio Mercedes aSTa Nicolás Frías
Background: The most successful of the Avenida clubs, and the second-most successful in the nation, La Nueva Avenida are a club focused on success. While their supporters have a bit of a xenophobic right-wing (ecological) streak at times, the truth is people of every type support them in their home state, purely because of how successful they've been historically. After a dark period of not winning anything, they finally managed to win the league again four seasons ago, and they're building on that to retake the crown that Mâ Âlâmëómë stole from them a few decades ago... to limited success. Let's be honest, it's an uphill battle. The club is nowadays being used as a vehicle for club legend Alex Terán's campaign for president of Farolera (the position does not exist right now; but that hasn't stopped him in the past), so expect bizarre situations relating to this to happen throughout the season.
Notes: Having Paige Daunten in goal solves half the problems for La Nueva Avenida. Their defense is a bit shakey, but the Zwangzugian keeper compensates for that. What does their midfield look like, then? Well, they feature players that are about as good as they can get without ever getting capped, which means it's a very good midfield for this league. They've also got Emiliano Gallegas on the wings. He's already been capped and he's far too fast and technical for most defenses in this league. Up front, they've got the best strike partnership in the league: Ugós Oroso is the star player of BoF runners-up Tioguldós, and has already shown signs of great promise in the state league, while Salomón de Zúñiga has been called up for the Farf NT for cycle 86. This is a team that, despite the odd runs of bad form, generally displays a lot of tactical restraint and player chemistry, which helps the whole be more than the sum of the parts.

Avenida Leal
Nickname: los Leales (the Loyal ones)
Derogatory nickname(s): la Plata (the money)
Manager: Constantino Martínez
Ground: Lealtad y Fuerza (30,000), located in Victoria Lago, Farolera
Major rivals: La Nueva Avenida (local), Avenida Principal (local), Avenida Victoria (local)
Major honours: 3 Farf Freitball Ligá titles, 1 Farf Freitball Ligá 2 title, 3 Faroleran state league titles
Infrastructure: Ground ★ / Training facilities ★ / Youth system ★ / Youth recruitment ★★★★
Fans' expectations: Win the title... but Champions' League qualification is probably fine
Pundits' prediction: 3rd place
Seasons in the First Division: 30 of 36
Starting Lineup: aGKa Noé Perea aLBa Shoji Suzukaze aCBa Trinidad Arochi aRBa Krysia Bailey aDMa Simón Franco aCMa Mark Anderson aCMa Travis Grimaldi aCMa Næmor Paala aLWa José Córdova aRWa Svetislav Cirkovic aSTa Nevaeh Cathar
Bench: aGKa Joel Irizarry aGKa Óscar Castro aLBa Esteban Ojeda aCBa Armando Villaseñor aRBa Aristide Agostino aDMa Tobías Santacruz aCMa Julián Rodríquez aCMa Adán Ávila aLWa Abel Terrazas aOMa Matías Marín aRWa Lorenzo Cruz aSTa Suaham Ararina
Background: Though Avenida Leal arrived comparatively late to the whole successful Avenida thing, they're nowadays arguably the second-best one historically, and some might argue the best one at the moment. They're a club of working class roots, much like La Nueva Avenida. In their case, they're heavily tied to the wood industry. This rather bizarrely puts them at odds with the rest of the Avenidas which, while more right-leaning, are much more environmental, going so far as to have their shared stadium in the forest. Silly chants about deforestation ensue. While the relationship between the Avenidas is bizarre, Avenida Leal can boast the title of "not very hated outside their home state", thanks to their many charitative efforts during the times of crisis. Notably, to date, none of their fans have died in clashes against Rulandese fans.
Notes: This team has, arguably, the scariest squad in the league. They can't quite get the mileage out of it that Mâ Âlâmëómë and René Skaé can, but the quality is definitely there. Travis Grimaldi, Krysia Bailey, Nevaeh Cathar. Those names make any team in Farfadillis tremble. The rest of the squad ranged from solid to very solid. They've signed Cirkovic from Prostran I Forzuda, which means they'll now play with two inside forwards after Cordova switched sides. Most defenses in this league are not used to this, so expect it to pay dividends. The defense is well-drilled, the midfield's finally becoming more experienced, they've got the second-best striker in the league... yeah, this is a scary team, alright.

René Skaé
Nickname: les Ezrenels (the Colonels)
Derogatory nickname(s): Barabara (intended to imitate uneducated mumbling)
Manager: Louis-Étienne Hevesi
Ground: Grand René Skaé (25,000), located in René Skaé, Szoirsia
Major rivals: Torrhe del Viento (local)
Major honours: 2 Farf Freitball Ligá titles, 1 Farf Freitball Ligá 2 title, 1 Farf Norde Ligá title, 1 Farf Amateur Ligá title, 3 Szoirsian state league titles
Infrastructure: Ground ★ / Training facilities ★ / Youth system ★ / Youth recruitment ★★★★★
Fans' expectations: Win the title and show all of Farfadillis that Szoirsia's boss
Pundits' prediction: 2nd place
Seasons in the First Division: 22 of 36
Starting Lineup: aGKa Berény Phelede aLBa Camille Auguste aCBa Ljuba Buczvarov aCBa Nadezhda Odling aRBa Darijen Vesele aCMa Pickering Sionne aCMa Lőrensz Ziczi aTKa Archard Ezaa Robé aLWa Lajos Éwanjé-Épée aOMa Tulaki Rauogba aRWa Elemér Miross-Lezocz
Bench: aGKa Géza Gaudin aGKa Alfred Molka aLBa Adhemar Amölsnoschin aCBa Denis Szibóth aCBa Béla Yannick aRBa Botond Zsabados aLMa Albert Bauhin aCMa András Zsabados aRMa Boldizsár Barrande aTKa Jenő Jéreus aSTa Boldizsár Coûteaux aSTa Yves Kiss
Background: Ever since René Skaé got promoted to the FFL, Szoirsian football has slowly and very steadily risen through the ranks. First they produced NT-caliber players like Zsolgar Zsase, Kósa Bajnok and, most famously, Lázár Eleonóra. Then, René Skaé started climbing the ranks, eventually winning back-to-back FFL titles, mostly thanks to a certain Faragó rue Cazade. Off-the-pitch, René Skaé is quite the sensation in Szoirsia, with most anyone in the desert-that-some-people-believe-to-be-a-nation supporting the club. They're the second most left-leaning (now ex-)state, so their fans naturally lean that way as well. Their fans are remarkably mild, perhaps owing to the temperatures of their state, which is 90% a huge fucking desert (as we have made clear) where things you didn't know could melt do melt. Ferdullaelans and Farolerans resent, fear and envy them, because Szoirsians are not supposed to be better at football than them.
Notes: This team is very, very good, yes. However, what's most remarkable about it is just how young it is. Tulaki Rauogba was almost named most promising youngster in the Multiverse recently, but there's also Lőrensz Ziczi, Archard Ezaa Robé and Lajos Éwanjé-Épée, the first two having already gotten caps for Farfadillis. Nadezdha Odling's already getting the occasional cap for Chromatika and is just 25. Darijen Vesele broke into the Siovanijan and Teus NT our of nowhere and got Galáctico longlisted. He's shown no signs of slowing down. You get the idea. This is a team with a solid four-man defense, with two no-nonsense centerbacks that most players in this league shit their pants, an electric, technical midfield and, finally... wait, what's this? There are no strikers? Hevesi, have you gone mad?

Mâ Âlâmëómë
Nickname: lôs Vhêrdês (the Green ones)
Derogatory nickname(s): Too many to count
Manager: Drì Kâíxìró
Ground: Rülândéá Çölíséá (35,000), located in Lìbêrêtê, Rülândéá
Major rivals: Dí Maozöxê (local), La Nueva Avenida (sporting)
Major honours: 14 Farf Freitball Ligá titles, 3 Atlantian Oceania Champions' League titles, 3 Rulandese state league titles
Infrastructure: Ground ★ / Training facilities ★ / Youth system ★ / Youth recruitment ★★★★★
Fans' expectations: Winning the title, giving the youth more chances
Pundits' prediction: 1st place
Seasons in the First Division: 30 of 36
Starting Lineup: aGKa Lídôr Wôsó aLBa Drö Yorópëlrío aCBa Alarabi Labeaga aRBa Kândé Lütéré aDMa Ôlégà Atsé aCMa Ígnîgo Çí Xôrí aCMa Zsolgar Zsase aLWa Lavanya Naqvi aOMa Dîmás Ósîn aRWa Ezalta Arambauzá aSTa Edmün Çídh
Bench: aGKa Drö Âloré aGKa Bâjâ Töxól aLBa Gëngêçío Quîrijá aCBa Lihonhegeí Puumalainen aRBa Rímân Dòrrò aDMa Rüí Xühî aCMa Éskïr Òmâgrûtá aCMa Çè Êréçênsér aLWa Çüs Aluansöó aCMa Çè Êréçênsér aOMa Lôrénsé Çêmîjìo aSTa Horâsio Wôndôji
Background: The one Farf club that any football fan worth their salt should be able to recognize. Mâ Âlâmëómë have had some of the best squads in the history of club football. Among the players that have worn green and black are: Mêndêlöíndçêl, Einarsson, Kâí, Etezadi, Aurora, Wínrôuge, Rainsford, Gosforth, Campbell, Zubiri, Shrike, Tzâín, Röènôùjýâ, Na'Kale, Söh, Wçêíl, Killanen, Soria Luna... you get the point. As a Rulandese club, they are utterly despised outside of Ruland. As the best Rulandese club, they are utterly despised in Ruland as well. Their fans, numerous and very violent, wouldn't give this up for the world. They were orignially founded as a loosely cultish collection of followers of one of the many Farf pagan faiths, one which venerated “Mother Earth”, better known as Mâ Âlâmëómë in the local language. True to their roots, they don't like the prevalence of uranium mining in Ruland. Unsurprisingly, they have many ties with past and present Rulandese revolutionary movements. However, to you and me, dear international reader, they're just that Farf behemoth nobody can spell or pronounce.
Notes: Mâ Âlâmëómë have an incredible backbone of academy graduates which always makes them title contenders. There are only two foreigners in the squad: Galáctico-longlisted Squornshelan Lavanya Naqvi, who could be argued to be the best dribbler in the league, and Alarabi Labeaga, who is, for all intents and purposes, a wall stretching across the edge of the box for half the teams in the league. They've also signed Ezalta Arambauzá on the right wing - did they really need to snap him up? It's hardly fair - but the rest of the starting eleven is a bunch of academy products. They range from upper-mid-table quality to La Vherderoja starter quality. Ígnîgo Çí Xôrí in midfield will take control of every game, while Edmün Çídh up front is the best striker in the league. Since most of these players have played together for years, they can play together off memory. They are no doubt the team to beat.

by **Farfadillis** » Thu Sep 17, 2020 12:55 pm

“Drì vö Wíjí, armed guard. Huh.” Fêrm handed the card back to him. “Can't believe we can afford IDs for our staff now. Guess the money really is rolling in.” He chuckled. “Anyway, stand over there by the door, I guess.”

Drì was happy to be there. Things were on the up lately, and he'd just gotten this shiny new job which involved holding a machine gun menacingly. He could now feed four instead of two of his children. Sure, he had six, but he'd take it. Life was good.

Besides, as a lifelong Rülândéá Kôstä fan, helping the team out in any way was a dream come true. He'd even gotten to see some of the players' faces! And Fêrm seemed every bit the unremarkable manager about whom information could not yet be found he supposedly was. Would he get to talk to the players at some point? Ask for a couple autographs for one or two of his children? With some luck...

“This first match is the most important one, lads.” Fêrm's distinctly indistinct voice snapped him back to reality. “Win today and I guarantee: you will be champions.”

“What? The madman! Does he really believe that?” Drì thought to himself. Who was he to question the one and only Fêrm Égéré? “Why are the players so silent?” He wanted to turn around and see.

“Tough crowd, huh.” Drì could hear him pace around. “No matter. You'll see it in time. You're every bit as good as the so-called favorites. Go out today and prove it to yourse- Gëngüdó stop chewing your shoelaces! What the fuck is wrong with you?” Drì turned around to take a peek and confirm that Pìgulôçô was, indeed, chewing his shoelaces. “Anyway, where was I... Ah, right. Lves.”

“What a tough crowd!” Drì thought to himself. Fêrm was giving it his all, clearly, even if his monotone voice could never show it. No matter. He knew exactly what the team needed. He took a very deep breath.

“Vìvââââ lâ Kôôôôstä LÂ PÜT KÈ PÂRYÖ-LÉÉÉÉÉS!” He bellowed as he fired into the ceiling. The deafening sound of the many rounds of bullets being fired off his machine gun, then ricocheting throughout the room, startled the players. Nobody was injured.

Looking around, Drì noticed some players had cowered to the floor in fear. Mostly the foreigners. There was a distinct smell of shit, too. Everyone looked at him in fear, except Fêrm.

With a smile, Fêrm grabbed Drì by the shoulders and placed him in front of the team. “Look at him! He believes!” He exclaimed with a triumphant tone. “Now go out and prove him right for believing in you!”

The players ran for the door instantly - the foreigners seemed particularly fast for whatever reason - and Drì felt a deep relief. For a second, he thought he had screwed up! But no, the players were clearly motivated now.

“So, Drì, right? vö something. Something like whiskey?” Fêrm extended his hand with a calid smile.

“Wìjì, sir.” He shook his hand. A very weak handshake from Fêrm. “What a sissy.” Drì thought to himself.

“Drì vö Wìjì. Perfect, got it. Drì, you mind handing me over your ID card for a second?”

Drì quickly obliged. Surely, he was getting promoted. Fêrm immediately tore the card up. It was very easy. I mean, it was made of cardboard.

“Pardon my manners.” Fêrm continued. “But I cannot let you continue to be the team's armed guard.”

“Here it comes!” Drì thought. “The promotion!” He was brimming with excitement and looked the part.

“I will tell the club to release you from your duties as armed guard immediately.”

“Because I'm getting promoted to...”

Fêrm raised his hand, offering him a high five, which Drì immediately accepted. “Team motivator!” They embraced and began jumping in excitement.

by **Farfadillis** » Sat Sep 26, 2020 2:01 pm

“Thanks a lot, dad. Be careful, you know he can be a bit of a handful.” With a push, Kîxò was left under his father's supervision.

Ënkyr chuckled. “He's not any worse than you were at his age, don't worry.” He ducked, as best he could, until he was level with his grandson. “We're going to the kânxá today, Kî.”

The father rolled his eyes. “I've told you not to get your hopes up. For all you know, he could turn out a Mâ Âlâmëomë supporter too.”

Ënkyr kept looking at Kîxò nonchalantly. “Kî, you're not going to be a huge fucking disappointment like papa, right?”

He smiled as he heard the obligatory “No, tôtô” then turned to his son. “We'll be back in three hours or so. Make your father some coffee for when he gets back, will you?” The father nodded and the two got on their way.

The Rulandese coast was at its most beautiful. The water's putrid green striking against the scattered shipwrecks, the smell of urine in the wind filling their nostrils, the neon-green drizzle. Wearing his Rülândéá Kôstä shirt from twenty seasons before, Ënkyr truly knew nothing better than the walk towards the stadium in anticipation of a match. More importantly, he didn't want to know anything better.

“Tôtô, why do we always lose?”

“Fuck off, kid.”

Rülândéá Kôstä had a massive following for a team in the fourth tier, but was failing to translate it to success on the field. Every match he took Kî to seemed to be a thrashing from some team with a silly name like Setenta y Siete Abejas which, if his Faroleran wasn't too shabby, meant seventy-seven bees. This time around they'd be facing Avenida Decepción. Disappointment avenue.

He was greeted with a hug by the stewards, then allowed to go through without paying, as always. They sat close to the southern goal. It was his favorite place. He got to see half the goals from up close. He hoped that one day he'd get to watch Rûlândëá Kôstä's most important goal from there. He'd been waiting for over fifty years. Most of the important ones had been at the other end.

Kîxò shifted in his seat energetically. “Matchmatchmatchmatchmatch” he repeated incessantly. “What do they give this kid?” He muttered to himself. Fortunately, he knew he would shut up as soon as the game began.

And that he did. The kick-off instantly assuaged him. Avenida Decepción scored within the first minute of play. Still, Kîxò watched unfazed, unperturbed. He was too young to understand the little big parts of football. How to react to a goal scored, to a goal conceded. How to cuss the ref. How to cuss the players. How to cuss the food vendor. For him, this was still just a game. No exhilaration, no outbursts of rage, no spending entire weeks depressed because Lügó fucking Gülîstí can't score for shit.

Bottom of the table, fighting relegation to the regional amateur leagues the FFFF didn't even bother to write about... that's why his son had started supporting Mâ Âlâmëómë: because Rülândéá Kôstä sucked. Rogerio Frutis dribbled past Tüy and Rângö, then smashed it past Göhàs. Two-nil.

He cussed at the food vendor. It was the universal way of making him come over. He was handed two hamburgers. He left him a generous tip, as usual. Kîxó grabbed his hamburger excitedly.

“Don't worry, tôtô. We will be better one day, I promise!” He said as he prepared to bite into his burger. They conceded again, just thirty seconds after restarting play. But that didn't matter. Only one word reverberated in his mind. We. He had said “We.” We will be better one day.

“Tôtô, don't cry!” Kî said, before hugging him.

by **Farfadillis** » Sat Sep 26, 2020 5:26 pm

Wallenbârr: arguably the most famous bar in all of Ruland. Set up X years Before Anarchy by famous (in Farfadillis) ex Buyanese NTer Frederik Wallenberg, shortly after becoming a joint-venture with ex Farf NTer Ivaktör Bârr, it had started off as a novelty to the Rulandese. A foreigner had actually decided to settle down in their godforsaken land. Not only that, but he would also serve you margaritas if you were willing to pay up!

Frederik had played for Avenida Leal throughout his career, and the motives for him settling down in Ruland of all places still remain a mystery. As the years went by, this had an interesting consequence: his son, Edison, signed for a local club and began trying to walk in his father's footsteps. He did so mediocrely, but became a well-liked person in the Rulandese coast. As time went by, more and more fans of Rülândéá Kôstä started frequenting Wallenbârr, in hopes of getting to share a pint with Edison. Eventually, the bar became synonymous with Rülândéá Kôstä, despite being squarely in Dí Maozöxê territory. So much so, that the squad would go there about once a month to unwind.

Baraxil downed his fifth Lìbërë Rülândéá of the night. “You know, I thought the gaffer was, like, was. Was full of shit, you know. With this whole winning the league thing.” His Rulandese was surprisingly good. His restraint? Not so much. “I gotta hand it to him.” Burp. “We are greats players. We'd have the title in the bag with different manager by now.”

Röémün, who was only there because he feared they'd stop passing the ball to him for being too stuck up, interjected. “I respectfully disagree. I think Fêrm is a great manager, and we owe a lot to him.”

Baraxil broke into laughter. “C'mon, Röé. I know ya thankful cause he played you an' shit and you're a big-time player now but you'd've walked into any team. Fêrm's a joke.” He signaled the waiter to bring him another drink. “Right, lads'” Erin shot him a murderous glance. “... and gals?”

Sêwansé shrugged. “Röé, you put three past René Skaé last week. You dribbled past at least one player in every goal. Did Fêrm teach you how to do that?”

“No, but!” Röémün hesitated, his cheeks turning red. “But that's cherry-picking!”

“Miss me with yer intellectual bullshits, Röé.” Baraxil spat. “Fêrm's not good just cause you haves no self-esteem.”

“Well, he teaches us tactics things. Like, defend and attack things. How score goals. You know.” Merluxia interjected. “It help to me, personally.”

“Oh, come on! Does any of you pay attention to his tactics videos? It is thirty minutes of telling you things that could be told to you in thirty seconds.” He stood up and started trying to gesticulate in the same way that Fêrm did. “Baraxil, you have to pass the balls to Sêwansé if Röémün is dragging their defenders.” He put on his best idiot voice. It was a very bad imitation. “What am I, twelve? I knows this shit.”

“It may being obvious to you, but it's not obvious to all us.” Merluxia shouted back. “Gengüdo has spilled drinks on himself all night long. He chews shoelaces. He needs to be explained!” She turned around. “Sorry, Gengüdo.” Gengüdo was too busy playing with his plastic straw.

“Guys, it's probably late but... we drank too much! We have game tomorrow!” Erin's cold tone of voice was unmistakable, even when shouting from the bathroom.

“Yeah, guys, we're playing tomorrow. Let's get going.” Röé timidly suggested.

“Non-sensical! We play La Querida, we can drink.” The Astograthian retorted. “Not drink. Pfft. What is this? Astograth?”

Everyone shot Émérí a glance. He'd spent the last half-hour sitting idly by the corner. He hadn't drunk at all.

Upon noticing this, he rolled his eyes and let out a profound sigh. “Bara, you wanna play checkers?”

The Astograthian downed another glass. “Yes. But today I'm gonna smash you while smashed!” He gestured towards the waiter, then pointed at his glass.

“Sure thing, buddy.” Émérí shrugged.

Erin grabbed him. “Don't let he drinks more. He drank too much today.” She whispered in his ear. “We're way past that point. Let's just hope the gaffer benches him tomorrow.” He whispered back.

As another waiter brought out the checkers board, the rest prepared to leave.

A traditional night at Wallenbârr but with more alcohol, fruit of their overconfidence.

Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ Ӿ

“Galván passes to Girón. He turns around. He dribbles past Kang. It's a through pass to Segura. The pause. He passes back. Salayeta beats Muhaburu to the ball! He's through! Shoots! GOOOOOOOOOOOOL! GOLAZO! ANARTZ SALAYETA WITH THE LAST-MINUTE EQUALIZER!”

by **Farfadillis** » Tue Sep 29, 2020 8:49 am

“Football is a simple game. Twenty-two men chase a ball for ninety minutes and at the end, Mâ Âlâmëómë always win”.

It was the most snobbish mantra a club could've come up with, but it rang true in Farfadillis. The club liked to inculcate it into every academy player. Even on him, an eighteen-year-old in the C-team. They were facing a team of amateur nobodies from a farf-flung village in eastern Ruland, but that hadn't stopped the manager from repeating it.

He was on thin ice, and he knew it. He'd been in the A-team just two years before. “Edmün's younger brother? You must be even better!” His first manager had exclaimed upon meeting him. Took him about five practice sessions to figure out that no, he wasn't. The B-team and C-team coaches figured it out a lot sooner: there's a reason why he wasn't in the A-team.

Not for lack of trying, though. The two managers that had demoted him had said the same thing: he had a fantastic work ethic, but he lacked the skill. He was a winger that tracked back. He ran endlessly. He had remarkable endurance and was a consummate professional, even at a young age. But one thing kept holding him back: at any point in time, his coaches had already seen his brother do everything he could not. Whenever he missed a clear-cut chance, the coaches would think to themselves “Edmün would've buried that”.

Tüý passed the ball to him. He turned around, passed it to Mülò, then made a run for it. Mülò passed it back with his first touch, though sloppily. No matter. He outran the defender, who was late to noticing his run, then faced the goalkeeper. He had to shoot with his weak foot, and there wasn't much angle. He went for it, nonetheless. He slightly overhit it, then fell to the floor. He got up, and timidly looked towards the manager. He was shaking his head. Röémün punched the floor.

“To play for Mâ Âlâmëómë, you have to be among the best of the best, a future star. If you're in the B-team, it is because we don't believe you are there yet, but we believe you can be”.

They'd said that, right? Many times, in fact. He wasn't in the B-team anymore. What'd that mean? That he no longer had it in him? He knew of -precisely zero C-team players that had made it professionally. He was playing with future miners, not future stars. And he was not standing out.

Tüý dribbled past three, then sent him through on goal. He was trying to make the most of the situation, Tüý. He was far and away the best player in the team, but would've been completely out of his depth on the A-team. He knew that, having played for it. Maybe he'd have success a semi-professional.

With these thoughts circling his head, Röé failed to control Tüý's pass, and his teammate insulted him for it. “Fuck off, Tüy” he replied in kind. Uncharacteristic of him, yes, but he'd already broken character at this point: he'd thrown the towel. Two minutes after that, he got subbed out.

“Röémün, I have to speak to you after the game,” the gaffer told him. “I know” he replied. He put on his jacket and walked the way home.

by **Farfadillis** » Tue Sep 29, 2020 4:04 pm

Rülândéá Kôstä are flying high. Fifty-three points in twenty-six games. Top of the table, ahead of Mâ Âlâmëómë by five points. They’re playing at home. With a win, they could find themselves with an eight-point cushion and nine games to go. They started to believe long ago; they are starting to feel like the title’s a certainty. Although Mâ Âlâmëómë had beaten them 4-2 at Rülândéá Çölíséá, tâ Kôstä had imposed themselves 5-0 when playing at home in matchday nine, stealing all the headlines in the process.

Röémün was making sure his shin pads were firm. He was ready. He’d have a better game than his brother. Pìgülôçô was similarly determined: he wanted to show them they’d been wrong in selling him; that he was a much better player than the prick that was Labeaga. On the other end, both Edmün and Labeaga only thought about they’d have a great game, much like any other.

During the first few minutes, it was clear that Rülândéá Kôstä wanted it much, much more. Kang, Muhaburu and Dü Ârusânìrá took over the midfield, like in so many other games. The Quebecois’ energy and technique, the Astograthian’s extremely smart management of tempo and space and the Rulandese’s frenetic pressing made Mâ Âlâmëómë unable to compete for thirty minutes. Lâlâw and Çídh, as a result, had no less than five clear-cut chances.

Lâlâw’s first, he sent it just wide. His second? It hit the crossbar. Tough luck for the young man. Çídh’s three chances? All overhit. A frustrating night for Röémün, no doubt, who’d done a great job to even get at the end of those chances to begin with. Labeaga himself, until that point the best defender in the league, was having immense trouble marking him.

But football can be a funny game. A moment of individual brilliance can change a match completely. Farves knew that very well: they’d won a World Cup on the back of Xíxì Êns’ brilliance. If you had to pick one player on that pitch who was closest to Xíxì, it would be Çídh... Edmün, not Röémün.

Just as the clock hit minute thirty-one, Çí Xôrí robbed the ball from Kang, dribbled past Muhaburu, then sent a through pass to Edmün. With his first touch, he nutmegged Pìgülôçô. With his second, he got past Bílísô. With his third, he calmly placed it in the top corner.

No matter, Fêrm figured. “Keep at it! They’re gonna crack!” He was half right.

Although Mâ Âlâmëómë's midfield was formidable, even featuring two Farf NTers, Kôstä's midfield three continued to dominate, until half time. However, Röémün and Lâlâw continued to miss their chances. Lâlâw even missed a sitter.

You can't keep showing mercy, not against Mâ Âlâmëómë, and they learned that in the second half. Smelling blood, Kâíxìró subbed in Êréçênser for Atsé, looking to outplay them in the midfield. Mâ Âlâmëómë began dominating and struck again within ten minutes. Zsase robbed the ball from Dü Ârusânìrá and relayed it to Çí Xôrí, who caught the Kôstä defense completely off-guard with an inch-perfect pass that found Edmün Çídh sneaking behind Pìgülôçô's back by a hair's breadth. The striker used his deft touch to position the ball in front of him and then, facing the goalkeeper, hammered it home. Two-nil.

With their spirits broken, Rülândéá Kôstä could no longer compete. They were dominated for the rest of the game. Labeaga went back to being an absolute wall. Neither Lâlâw nor Röémün could pass him for the remained of the match. Çí Xôrí's quality continued to shine through: at points, it looked like he could've dominated the midfield all by himself. And, finally, Edmün's clinical finishing sealed the deal: in the seventy-eighth minute, he dribbled past Pìgülôçô, then fired past Tjova for the third time. A hat-trick, from the better Çídh. Full time, and every Kôstä fan had been left thinking they had been flying too close to the sun.

Rülândéá Kôsta were sitting atop the table, holding a two-point lead, with nine matches to go. Still, they were all reminded about the saying.

“Football is a simple game. Twenty-two men chase a ball for ninety minutes and at the end, Mâ Âlâmëómë always win”.

by **Farfadillis** » Tue Sep 29, 2020 6:22 pm

The silly song that inspired this

Matchday 33 (out of 36) has almost come to a close and the title race is going right down to the wire. Five losses in a row, followed by a measly 1-0 win against La Querida, have left Rülândéá Kôstä trailing Mâ Âlâmëómë (who else?) by three goals. René Skaé are in hot pursuit, just one point behind them. La Nueva Avenida are about to face La Querida, and they are expected to thrash them. With a win, they'll pull level on points, though they'll still be lagging behind on goals. Unless they win 10-0.

Oh, what's that? They're leading 5-0 after half time? Anartz Salayeta, La Querida's only good player, has been subbed out due to injury? Oroso has scored two, de Zúñiga another two and Gallegas scored the fifth one. This is the perfect time for La Querida's most hardcore fans to bust out their shiny new chant!

Somos unos nabos, nos llevamos bien
We're dumb, we get along well

Ugós Oroso muscles Malave off the ball, dribbles past two, scores. 6-0.

Armamos un equipo de lo peor
We built a very bad team

Galván gets sent off for a flying, studs-up and to-the-face tackle on de Zúñiga. The striker gets up, but he does look uglier. Will the La Querida defense hold after this?

Lalito en el arco ni la ve
Lalito in goal can't even see the ball

Of course it doesn't. Lalito fails to save a very poor shot from de Zúñiga, who's been having a hard time keeping his balance for whatever reason.

Mauricio de nueve, no la metés
Mauricio as nine, you can't put it in

By the way, they've been singing this on repeat throughout the second half. I'm just giving you the highlights. The times when the timing was just right! Mauricio Segura misses a sitter. 7-0 still.

Nuestra mascota no quiere venir
Our mascot doesn't want to come
No quiere tener más un bajón
It doesn't want another bummer

It's a chicken. The mascot is a chicken. Also, the guy hired to wear that ridiculous costume struggles with alcoholism and that's why he struggles to go to away games. Bit insensitive.

Todos los cotejos vamos para atrás
Every match we stay at the back

I mean, can you blame them? All ten of them are inside the box at the moment. Fernand Way with the long-range effort. Bam. It rebounded on two people. Goal. 8-0.

Somos una banda del montón
We're a mediocre bunch of guys

Anartz Salayeta isn't. Presumably, that's why they started chanting this as soon as he came off.

No le ganamos a nadie (x4)
We don't beat anybody (x4)

They've got four wins so far, actually, but the sentiment does ring true.

Si somos locales nos enchufan tres
If we play at home we ship in three

Sometimes more, but yeah.

Si somos visitantes mejor no volver
If we play on the road we better not return

Oroso's through on goal, again. He's slashed down by Buriain. Another red. Oroso himself takes the penalty, and it's a goal. 9-0.

Le ponemos garra y mucho corazón
We pour blood, sweat and tears into it

They've certainly been putting in a lot of effort. Even at 9-0, two men down, they're giving it their all.

No vemos la redonda ni por televisión
We don't see the ball, not even on the telly

But... yeah, possession's been 92%-8% the last twenty minutes.

Todos los cotejos vamos para atrás
Every match we stay at the back
Somos una banda del montón
We're a mediocre bunch of guys
No le ganamos a nadie (x4)
We don't beat anybody (x4)

As they sing this, Oroso scores a fifth goal. A nice header off a corner taken by Gallegas. 10-0.

En tinto y choripanes somos lo mejor
At wine and choripán we are the best
Siempre de la birra y del alfajor
Always have beer and alfajor

The team does have a cheerful demeanor, if nothing else. Alternatively, some players are out of shape due to a bad diet and unprofessional drinking habits.

En esa no nos gana nadie (x12)
At that, nobody beats us (x12)

Silver linings.

-                        Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Mâ Âlâmëomë            33   16   9   8    80   52  +28    57
 2 La Nueva Avenida       33   17   6  10    87   60  +27    57
 3 Rülândéá Kôstä         33   17   6  10    93   68  +25    57
 4 René Skaé              33   15  11   7    92   49  +43    56
 5 Dí Maozöxê             33   13  10  10    78   58  +20    49
 6 Ausharmuj Marusi       33   12   8  13    67   69   −2    44
 7 Lâ Lüs                 33   13   5  15    50   68  −18    44
 8 Avenida Leal           33   11  10  12    51   68  −17    43
 9 Avenida Principal      33    8   9  16    51   83  −32    33
10 La Querida             33    4   4  25    32  106  −74    16

by **Farfadillis** » Tue Sep 29, 2020 11:08 pm

“You know, if that poor girl has to glance at you a fourth time, I'm gonna smack you”.

“Shut up, tôtô. The game's about to start”.

“Oh, so now you pay attention from the get-go. Pussy”.

Twenty matchdays in, they were three points above the red zone... which was about ten points above expectations, give or take another ten. Last season had been a fluke, they'd figured. They'd barely gotten promoted and all pundits thought they'd go straight back down along with Dô Fäéýkô. As everybody knew, there were only, and there would only ever be, two good Rulandese teams.

They were facing Flamagua, who were an okay team. Definitely much better than Rülândéá Kôstä. Up front, they had none other than José Torino Fuego. 73 caps, 21 goals. The only decent player (and the only capped played) they had was Edison Wallenberg, who couldn't hold down a starting spot for a shadow of a Buyan team.

For the first twenty minutes, Rülândéá Kôstä managed to hang on, but Flamagua's pressure was relentless. Eventually, they gave in. Fuego himself chested down a long pass at the edge of the box, then left Kêsê biting the dust with a body feint. He passed it to an incoming Des Lopiño, who slotted it away. 1-0, as expected.

He reclined and sighed, put his hands behind his head, then let out a simple, yet colorful “LÂ PÜT KÈ PÂRYÖ-MÉ”. That's “fuck's sake” for you and me. Ënkyr smacked him on the head.

“What? I can't cuss now?” He complained, confused.

“Nah, she glanced at you again, is all.” He crossed his arms, upset at the goal.

Kîxò rubbed his head. “We're at the stadium, I come here to watch the team, nothing else”.

“I met your grandma here, you know?”

“Yes, tôtô. You've mentioned it. Many times, actually”.

Ënkyr shook his head. “Point is, Kî, this is your second home. Start treating it like it.”

“You just want me to marry a Kôstä fan, don't you?”

“Look, kid. I never wanted you to be a fan of this team cause we're good. I mean -” He pointed towards the pitch. Âgúâ misplaced a pass quite terribly. “Seriously”. He took a moment to insult Âgúâ, who was having a bit of a shocker that day. “I wanted you to be a fan because this community has been important for me”.

Kîxò tilted his head.

“I've laughed, cried, and punched people here”. Kî raised an eyebrow. “I met your grandma and, when I lost her, my only consolation was Fürgààn hat-trick two days later. I told him personally a few months later and he gifted me the ball from that day. He signed it and all.”

“You're rambling, tôtô.”

The old man sighed, weary. “Look, I've lived here, in this stadium. I did fine. Might as well try it yourself”. A Fuego shot grazed the crossbar. “Chances are I'll die here as well. Of a heart attack.”

“Just watch the game”.

“Tell you what. If we turn this game around, you approach the girl”.

“And if we don't?”

“Then I'll stop giving you shit for being a pussy”.

Kîxò chuckled. “Fine.”

by **Farfadillis** » Wed Sep 30, 2020 1:14 pm

Now back in print after a brief ten-year hiatus!

Lìbêrêtê gears up for nerve-wracking final matchday

As the FFL's final season is coming to an end, the title race is looking tighter than ever. No less than four teams can win the league tomorrow. René Skaé are expected to take care of business against La Querida, and the same goes for La Nueva Avenida, though an upset against Lâ Lus is not out of the question. However, those two matches (plus Ausharmuj Marusi against Dí Maozöxê and Avenida Principal against Avenida Leal, which will in essence be friendly games) will take the backseat to what will happening at Rülândéá Çölíséá, as Mâ Âlâmëómë host Rülândéá Kôstä in a winner-take-all game. Only if the game ends in a draw can René Skaé and La Nueva Avenida dream of lifting the trophy.

It has been a long season for both teams, who have made up the top two for most of the season, dropping points many times along the way, in a remarkably competitive season for the FFL. Many were astonished to see Rülândéá Kôstä keep up their title challenge through the first two rounds, but it is safe to say there are no doubters left: they are serious about this. Although their squad is, on paper, weaker than that of Mâ Âlâmëómë, René Skaé and La Nueva Avenida, they have nonetheless displayed an attractive brand of football and remarkable consistency, as well as healthy dose of luck, to get where they are.

While Rülândéá Kôstä will be looking to win the league for the first time in their history, Mâ Âlâmëómë will be looking to extend their record for most wins by adding a fifteenth FFL trophy to their cabinet. It is no surprise, therefore, that most neutrals will be supporting Rülândéá Kôstä tomorrow.

The two teams have faced each other four times this season: once in the state league, and three times in the FFL. Tâ Kôstä came out on top in the first game, thrashing lôs Vhêrdês at home three-nil, then going on to win the state league. They performed even better in the second game, once again at home, smashing their opponents five-nil. However, their fortunes saw a reversal in the following two matches, in which Mâ Âlâmëóme came out on top four-two at Rülândéá Çölíséa, then three-nil at Âréné Délékôstä. All four matches saw one of the two sides be the clearly superior team.

Both teams have struggled to find their form in recent matchdays, which is how René Skaé and La Nueva Avenida still stand a chance to win the title tomorrow, even though they were trailing by over five points for a good portion of the season, sometimes going as high as ten.

Expected line-ups for tomorrow's game

As is tradition, injuries have not been a problem for either team, and both are expected to field their best line-ups tomorrow. Rülândéá Kôstä will be hoping to impose themselves in midfield, as that was the key to their previous wins against Mâ Âlâmëómë, but will have their work cut out for them as Çí Xôrí and Zsase are in the form of their lives. Regardless, it is very clear that both teams consider midfield their strongest area, and it is believed the match will be decided there.

In defense, Mâ Âlâmëómë have been notably more consistent, letting in almost one third fewer goals than their opponents. Their slightly less attacking style, combined with Labeaga's heroics in defense, has contributed to this. While their opponents have struggled in defense, though, they also have scored eleven more goals, despite having inferior firepower on paper. This can, once again, be partially explained by the differing tactical styles.

An interesting narrative for tomorrow's game is that brother's Edmün and Röémün Çídh will be facing each other. The two have displayed a great understanding at the international level when representing Farfadillis, but they are expected to leave any feelings of fraternity aside tomorrow. Although Edmün is considered the better player, nobody can deny Röémün has been going from strength to strength and has been a key piece for Fêrm Égéré's side. Edmün is on thirty goals this season, while Röémün is on twenty-seven. Together with Ugós Oroso, who is on twenty-eight, they round out the top three for most goals.

FFFF President-for-life Alex Terán has announced that he will be hiring mercenaries from all over Farfadillis in an effort to prevent any violence between the supporters of the two teams. “We believe every family should be able to go to a game of football without fearing for their lives. Yes, even Rulandese families”. When prodded further about his xenophobic remarks, he answered as follows: “Look, I've been working round the clock trying to figure out some very important shit relating to the league's future. I've had to learn a whole new language these last few months, and also set out plans to set the FFFF's headquarters on fire. Give me a break, I'm stressed, what harm's a little xenophobia gonna do, anyway?”

by **Farfadillis** » Thu Oct 01, 2020 10:18 pm

“Ënkyr, have some manners.” He smacked him in the head. “Let the old man go first.”

Ënkyr rubbed his head, regretful. “Sorry, pápà.”

They had some trouble finding seats, as Rülândéá Çölíséá was filled to the brim. Mâ Âlâmëómë had given tâ Kôstä only one stand, hoping home advantage would save the day. Kîxò looked around him. The stand had enough space for ten thousand people, but he was pretty sure there were a good deal more Kôstä faithfuls. The mild annoyance of not having where to sit didn’t even register, however; neither did the not-so-mild annoyance of having to carry his son on his shoulders.

Rülândéá Kôstä, league champions. It had a very nice ring to it. Never in a million years would he have thought he’d witness it, yet there he’d be, maybe. Maybe, just maybe, in two hours, there he’d be.

The Mâ Âlâmëómë players entered the pitch first to deafening ovation. Three minutes later, the Rülândéá Kôstä players followed them, to similarly deafening ovation. Or, at least, that’s how it felt from Kîxò’s perspective.

The pre-match formalities came and went, and Mâ Âlâmëómë kicked off. Kîxò braced himself for some of the most stressful moments of his life. The entire season had been an emotional rollercoaster. At this point, he was sure the game would be won in injury time, off a bicycle kick, after three red cards and a streaker. It would only be fitting.

He had very little time to dwell on these thoughts, however.

“GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!”

His eardrums almost bursting made him snap back to reality. What? When? How? He had wandered off. Röémün was kissing the crest. The rest of the team was running towards him.

“RÖÉÉÉÉÉ-MÜÜÜÜÚN! RÖÉÉÉÉÉ-MÜÜÜÜÚN! RÖÉÉÉÉÉ-MÜÜÜÜÚN!”

He could hear his son joining the chants. He joined them too.

After things had settled down a bit, he finally came down to earth. They were winning. One-nil, in the very first minute. Eighty-nine minutes trying to preserve the lead awaited. Good God, he was not sure his heart would be able to withstand it.

So many years of shit football. So many thrashings. So much heartbreak, and all of it, absolutely all of it, could be getting washed away soon. Well, almost all of it. If only this had happened two years earlier so he could see it. He would’ve enjoyed it more than anyone.

The stand kept getting louder and louder, to the point that he was sure he’d have trouble hearing for the entire week. It made him comfortable, however. It always had.

Mâ Âlâmëómë began frantically looking for an equalizer and came very close to getting it for about ten minutes. Their chances never went further than the odd “Oooh” and “Ahhh” though.

Kang dispossessed Atsé and started heading towards goal as if the Devil himself had taken hold of her. The Mâ Âlâmëómë defense had left a huge gap in their efforts to equalize. She could pass the ball to Röémün, who was trying to time a good run. And Kîxò was there, watching it all unfold. He knew what was about to happen as soon as Erin looked down at the ball.

“GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!”

He could not jump, he could not hug the stranger’s beside him and he could not even raise his arms, for he had his son on his shoulders. But he could shout, and shout he did. From the very top of his lungs.

Not even fifteen minutes had passed! They were already two-nil up! He could not believe it. He wished he could pinch himself. Somewhere, deep down, he was starting to believe they’d do it, to truly believe it.

The state league title now seemed pitifully small in comparison. They were close to a league title. He wondered what was in store for them now. Would Mâ Âlâmëómë pull one back, then quickly equalize? This game had “drama” written all over it, after all.

Dü Ârusânìrá stripped Zsase of the ball. He passed it back to Muhaburu. The Astograthian did not hesitate, and with just one touch went for a risky long pass to Röémün. The striker managed to sneak behind the backline, thanks to their desperation. With a deft touch, he put the ball to sleep. He looked up. Wôsó approached. With a light punt, he chipped it over him. The ball bounced once.

“GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!”

Röémün ran towards the stands, jumped over the ad boards and joined the fans for the celebration. He was trying very hard not to cry.

Over twenty years of suffering. Promotions, trying to stay up, never breaking past mid-table. These players had been handed the script and decided to ignore it completely. Three goals up, thirty minutes in. Mâ Âlâmëómë had their work cut out for them. A three-goal comeback was not unheard of in Farfadillis.

The referee blew the whistle. Röémün had been brought down. A free kick, right at the edge of the box. The fans insulted the ref. To them, it had been a penalty. Röémün shouted at Égéré, begging to take the free kick. The manager gave his blessing.

Five minutes to go until half time. Röémün prepared. He advanced, looked down and unleashed his shot.

“GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!”

They were gonna make it. They were gonna win the league. He could not hold the tears back anymore. For the first time in two years, tears were flowing from his eyes. For a minute, he contemplated. He just contemplated.

van de Kraan took a corner kick. Muhaburu jumped.

“GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!”

He grabbed his son, slowly lowered him to the ground, then embraced him. He held onto him for a minute or two. He wasn't sure, he'd lost track of time by now. He leaned back.

“Pápà, don’t cry, we’re winning!” Ënkyr exclaimed, confused. Kî just hugged him again.

by **Farfadillis** » Thu Oct 01, 2020 10:19 pm

-Season 36-

Review

Rülândéá Kôstä have shocked the nine nations! An impressive season from them, coupled with an unimpressive season from the usual contenders, has led to the Rulandese minnows winning their first major title. They owe much of their success to their midfield three. Erin Kang's energy and eye for a good pass were key, especially in the most important matches. Émérí Dü Ârusânìrá showed that Faragó rue Cazade does not have a monopoly on good takilantes. He got sent off a couple of times, yes, but was also the team's third goalscorer and an imposing presence in centre midfield. Some are already arguing he should be getting called up to the national team. Baraxil Muhaburu was also a key piece, but for different reasons: the Astograthian's brain-over-brawn was vital when facing more physical teams. He displayed brilliant playmaking skills, as well as a natural gift for setting the tempo of the game. As it turns out, you can play football slowly too. Who knew? Up front, young striker Röémün Çídh proved absolutely deadly, despite a supposed lack of technical skill. He won the golden boot by being tall, strong, fast and knowing how to be at the right place at the right time. And putting four past Mâ Âlâmëomë in the final matchday.

Although the team eventually finished in second place, achieving the much-coveted Champions' League qualification, René Skaé fans will be disappointed to have never been truly in the fight for the title. Although they were always in close pursuit, they were behind both Mâ Âlâmëómë and Rülândéá Kôstä throughout the season, only drawing closer as both teams started imploding towards the end of the season. As a result, fans will look back and regret the team's patchy form at the beginning of the season. Nonetheless, they were arguably the best team in the league. Turorian midfielder Tulaki Rauogba won the best young player award for his efforts. A great playmaker and a great goalscorer, with good dribbling to boot: it's safe to say he's the complete package. Fullback Darijen Vesele was the team's best player. From a usually unfancied position, he was impeccably tidy on defense while contributing immensely on attack. The older football fans are claiming he reminds them of Bacary Na'Kale, from back in the day. Those are big shoes to fill, but Darijen looks up to the task. Midfielders Lőrensz Ziczi, Pickering Sionne and Archard Ezaa Robé were extremely solid, though perhaps not at the same level as the midfielders of the other title contenders.

After the utter collapse that was the title match, heads will no doubt be rolling at Mâ Âlâmëómë. Although they were in the title race throughout the season, and had arrived at the final matchday as the favorites to win the title, only needing a win at home, they were played out of the park by an inspired Rülândéá Kôstä side and handed perhaps the biggest humiliation in the club's history. Once the dust settles, however, plenty of positives will become readily apparent. Ígnîgo Çí Xôrí was a man possessed in midfield, especially in the second half of the season. He earned himself the best player award by being a truly complete midfielder. Zsolgar Zsase was a good foil to him throughout the season. He has been quietly one of the best players in the league, and probably has a few more seasons left in him. In defense, Alarabi Labeaga was undeniably the best centerback in the league, his imposing physique proving too much for the average Farves. He has, however, started showing surprising comfort on the ball as well. Up front, Edmün Çídh was a true goal machine. His technique, his speed and his finishing make him a force to be reckoned with. Lavanya Naqvi was another positive, the winger setting up Çídh very often. The rest of the team, however, have big question marks hanging over their heads at the moment. Or, alternatively, huge targets on their backs. Perhaps literally. Who knows? It's Ruland.

Although Rülândéá Kôstä smashing Mâ Âlâmëómë saved them from further embarrassment, it can't be denied that La Nueva Avenida choked horribly in the last matchday. They would've qualified to the Champions' League with a win, but instead fell 5-3 to Lâ Lüs. They were, however, much closer to winning the title than most people thought they would be. Therefore, despite the bitter taste the end of the season might've left, fans will have reasons to be happy about how it all turned out. Ugós Oroso, in particular, proved to be an inspired signing. The Tiog striker just kept banging them in, trailing only the Çídh brothers in the goal charts. He even eclipsed Salomón de Zúñiga, who has represented Farfadillis at an international level. The Farf striker had a quiet season by his standards, but still scored his fair share. The team's best player might arguably have been Emiliano Gallegas, however. The winger terrorized defenses all season long, and was one of the reasons why Oroso managed to have such a great first season. He assisted no less than one-third of the Tiog's goals. One has to wonder how long La Nueva Avenida will be able to hang onto him, however. Paige Daunten did remarkably well despite her defenders doing... not that remarkably well. The Zwangzugian earned herself the unofficial best goalkeeper award (also known as a spot in the best eleven) for her efforts.

In fifth place, barely sneaking into IFCF spots, we have Dí Maozöxê. Lôs Rébélés will be very disappointed with the team's performances this season, at least when comparing themselves to the four teams above them. The truth is, they were decidedly a tier below the other teams, and might have to spend hard next transfer window to compensate for this. They can't rely on their academy forever, especially when foreign signings such as Keaton Durbridge and Alois Chilliarch were some of their best performers. The Delaclav winger in particular, as he kept opening up defenses, sometimes fruitlessly as his teammates weren't up to the task. Goalkeeper Íüé Tgô was, as always, fantastic. Of the defenders, only Têrçêr Ànáxímane need not worry about being replaced, having had a fairly good season. In midfield, Mrii youngster Alkrÿ Bren was the only consistent performer, his playmaking and marking making up for his lack of dribbling skills. The rest of the team, however, should watch out. Dí Maozöxê definitely needs to do something if they want to stay near the top.

In sixth place, Lâ Lüs appear to have partially regressed to the mean. They are still performing far better than any of us would've expected them to a few seasons ago, but are no longer challenging for the title. It is a fine position to be in, especially when all of the people associated with your club appear to, very suspiciously, have direct ties to a revolutionary movement intending to take over Ruland, incidentally also called Lâ Lüs. The team's star was, predictably, Tôsgo Alxíkí, who had a quiet season by his standards and, therefore, had a very good season. None of the other young players were anywhere near his level, unfortunately, and many will be asking themselves what the hell is going on with Çè Quîrijá, whose form has gone down the drain the last year. One player we can highlight, for slightly different reasons, is Nufro de Urueña who broke the previous record of two goals scored with the ass in a season, by scoring three goals with his ass. Two of them accidental, the third one intentional, presumably in search of the record. La Nueva Avenida fans found it very aggravating.

Ausharmuj Marusi did well to finish seventh, seeing as they were predicted to finish ninth. Their squad just doesn't have the players to compete with the other teams. However, there were a few players that definitely showed enough quality to fit into some of the better teams. Ecésar der Efer was very solid in defense, and displayed a lot of skill going forward. Liberté Salogadó as always, was a key piece in midfield, though a bit more quietly than usual. Eslejes Aljojí was extremely energetic. A bit rough around the edges, and five red cards is a bit worrying, but very good nonetheless. Left winger Joaquim Martell hit the ground running, scoring and assisting his fair share. Tiog players Óstam Perda Raom and Pmoifue Jopar had a very good connection up front, and Joe Green did not disappoint. You might be saying “Hey isn't this like the entire starting eleven?” And the answer is no, and the rest of the team sucked a lot. Due to the success of foreign players, though, they might be inclined to sign even more for next season.

Ok, hold up. Is that Avenida Leal in eighth place? ⸘Qué pasó‽ Nothing, absolutely nothing went their way, that's what happened. Goalkeeper Noé Perea went down with an ACL tear (how does that happen to a goalkeeper?) in the second game of the season and his replacement Joel Irizarry was godawful. So much so, that the club terminated his contract by the fifteenth game. In came Óscar Castro, who was somehow worse. By the end of the season, seventh goalkeeper Rogerio Defigueroa had proven he was good enough for the starting spot. Too bad it took them thirty-two games to figure it out. Anyway, in midfield, only Travis Grimaldi can claim to have had a good season, the Parker midfielder having to carry the entire team during many, many games. Up front, Nevaeh Cathar was starved for chances, and had to make do with what she could get. She scored a surprising number of goals considering that. Well, a surprising number of goals if you didn't know who she was.

Although ninth place was not out of the question for Avenida Principal they will be disappointed by the manner in which they finished there. They were ten points below eighth place, and they played some dreadful football throughout the season. Spoiling La Nueva Avenida's title run in the penultimate matchday was the only true highlight of the season. The only true positives were goalkeeper Lemuel Bereket, who had too much in his hands with the terrible defense in front of him, Alson Figueroa, who nonetheless showed signs of age catching up to him, and Leandro Martelli, who should probably be signing for a better team at this point, considering he was the team's only threat up front.

In dead last, La Querida fans nonetheless had a lot of fun just being here. Anartz Salayeta scored... wow. Half their goals. El Tronco, as the fans have come to affectionately call him, was massive for them, but there's only so much you can do. His limited mobility (you can't be two meters tall and move fast; I'm sorry) made the team especially toothless against the better teams. Nonetheless, he banged them in from set pieces all season long, and notably scored against all teams at least once. Centerbacks Horazio Buriain and Raul Hoyo were surprisingly decent, but their affiliation to the Faroleran Workers' Union saw them missing nineteen goals due to going on strike. Unsurprisingly, the eight times they didn't lose, all of Salayeta, Buriarin and Hoyo played the full ninety minutes.

-   Team                  Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
-1  Rülândéá Kôstä         36   19   6  11   102   71  +31    63 Champions----------
-2  René Skaé              36   17  11   8   100   54  +46    62 Champions’ League--
-3  Mâ Âlâmëomë            36   17  10   9    84   61  +23    61 Challenger’s Cup---
 4  La Nueva Avenida       36   18   6  12    91   68  +23    60 Challenger’s Cup---
 5  Dí Maozöxê             36   14  10  12    81   64  +17    52 Challenger’s Cup---
 6  Lâ Lüs                 36   15   6  15    59   73  −14    51
 7  Ausharmuj Marusi       36   14   8  14    74   71   +3    50
 8  Avenida Leal           36   12  11  13    57   77  −20    47
 9  Avenida Principal      36    9  10  17    57   87  −30    37
10  La Querida             36    4   4  28    34  113  −79    16

Average Rating   Games Played    Player Name          Club     
-    8.39             33         Ígnîgo Çí Xôrí       Mâ Âlâmëómë-------------------
-    8.32             34         Erin Kang            Rülândéá Kôstä    ------------
-    8.30             31         Darijen Vesele       René Skaé---------------------

-Goals Scored    Games Played    Player Name          Club     
-     31              36         Röémün Çídh          Rülândéá Kôstä    ------------
-     30              33         Edmün Çídh           Mâ Âlâmëómë-------------------
-     29              32         Ugós Oroso           La Nueva Avenida--------------

Average Rating   Games Played    Player Name          Club     
-    8.22             30         Tulaki Rauogba       René Skaé---------------------
-    8.18             36         Tôsgo Alxíkí         Lâ Lüs    --------------------
-    8.10             31         Gëngüdó Pìgulôçô     Rülândéá Kôstä    ------------

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