International Domestic Soccer NewsWires

by **Miskatonic University** » Thu Mar 08, 2012 10:14 am

Miskatonic Football Association
Season 404

UICA Qualifications

CC: Extramarine
GC: Old Tamarindians, Rear Admirals, Tanguy School of Architecture
SB: Students of Sixteen Bits, Young Tamarindians, Rosicruxxia, Clunwardine Salopia

The Miskatonic University is the principle organiser of football in the nation of Wight, where traditionally professors, lecturers, graduates, under-graduates, administrators, cleaners, alumni and general riff-raff with an interest in playing come together to compete for the various departments and schools. However, with a burgeoning interest in the sport across the dimensions governed by Búa, beyond the confines of the colleges, a slow expansion is beginning to take place. Nonetheless, the MIU remains the governing body of the sport, by decree.

Football is now divided into two separate streams, the Varsity Leagues and the Haphazard Foundation.

Miskatonic Varsity Leagues

There are three leagues of varying standard in the Miskatonic Varsity Leagues; at the top of the pile are two equally ranked leagues - the Inter-Faculty and Alumni leagues. Under UICA rulings, these two leagues will provide candidates for UICA Champions Cup and Globe Cup competitions. Winners of the top two leagues will compete in the Despite Trophy - to decide the University champion. Below the top leagues is the Students Union Football League for present students - this will provide candidates for the UICA Serie B Competition. There is no movement of teams between leagues, but of course there is movement of players, as they graduate and move to the alumni or become faculty staff.

The Haphazard Foundation

The Haphazard Foundation traditionally provided a league of clubs for those students, staff and alumni not good enough to play for the more serious teams - the riff-raff. But with an increase in the interest of football across Búa's dominion, the Haphazard Foundation will provide a league structure of several divisions to provide opportunities for widening participation. Initially, in this season 404 (as determined by the new calendar system introduced for all Búa's wide dominions) the expansion will be to a second division. Further divisions will be added as demand increases. The top division will provided candidates for UICA entry into the Champions Cup and Globe Cup competitions; while the second division will provide candidates for the UICA Serie B Competition. The HF leagues will operate a 4-up, 4-down promotion system.

At the end of the regular season, the top four from each of the three top-tier divisions of the Varsity and Haphazard Leagues will compete for MIU's CC and GC allocation in a post-season tournament; while the top four in each of the two second-tier divisions will compete for MIU's SB allocation.

Senior Championships
Under the new two-stream system, Extramarine become the first official champions of Wight, and in so doing have rubbished the argument from the Varsity Leagues that the Haphazard Foundation - set up for the 'riff-raff' - is not good enough to be considered for UICA qualification. Already a puritan divide is emerging between the Academic old school, and the non-academic modernisers of the game from the Foundation. First blood goes to the Foundation, although in truth the other three teams finished in the bottom four of the Senior Championships, so it is only the dominance of Extramarine that spared the blushes of the Haphazard Foundation.

Team               
  1 Extramarine                        11  8  2  1  35  13  +22  26CC Qualification
  2 Old Tamarindians                   11  6  1  4  26  18   +8  19GC Qualification
  3 Rear Admirals                      11  5  2  4  21  20   +1  17GC Qualification
  4 Tanguy School of Architecture      11  5  2  4  26  16  +10  17GC Qualification
  5 Department of Administration       11  4  4  3  23  19   +4  16
  6 Un Chien Andalou School            11  4  3  4  21  20   +1  15
  7 Asyluum                            11  4  2  5  19  24   -5  14
  8 Old Fellateians                    11  3  4  4  22  18   +4  13
  9 Arkham Asyluum                     11  3  4  4  18  27   -9  13
 10 Old Realists                       11  3  3  5  19  30  -11  12
 11 Wight Spit Casuals                 11  3  2  6  11  27  -16  11
 12 Búa's Boys FC                      11  3  1  7  14  23   -9  10

Junior Championships
Students of Sixteen Bits, having retained the SU title, went on to dominate the Junior Championships and are the only team unbeaten in the post-season competitions. Tamarindia College can enjoy a double success of having both the present and past students in UICA competitions next season, while there was a good showing from the HF Second Division with champions Rosicruxxia and surprise package Clunwardine Salopia both grabbing spots in the Serie-B Champions Cup.

Team                             
 1 Students of Sixteen Bits      7  5  2  0  19   9  +10  17SB Qualification
 2 Young Tamarindians            7  4  0  3  18  11   +7  12SB Qualification
 3 Rosicruxxia                   7  3  2  2  11  12   -1  11SB Qualification
 4 Clunwardine Salopia           7  3  2  2  12   8   +4  11SB Qualification
 5 Junior Theologians            7  2  2  3   7   6   +1   8
 6 Library Apprentices           7  2  1  4   8  11   -3   7
 7 Sondry Hundred FC             7  1  3  3   9  14   -5   6
 8 Oroboros                      7  1  2  4   7  20  -13   5

Despite Trophy
Miskatonic University Championship Game

Old Fellateians 0-1 Tanguy School of Architecture

Inter-Faculty Football League
A nine point margin for pre-season favourites Tanguy was hardly a surprise, and to go on to win the Varsity title is just reward for the Architects. Meanwhile the Department for Administration sprung a surprise second-place finish, and Un Chien Andalou will be disappointed to have finished so far off the pace. At the bottom, The School of Linguistics will be disappointed with their return but at least relieved that their old boys managed to take some of the heat off them by taking the Alumni title.

Team                            
  1 Tanguy School of Architecture           42  28   3  11  102   58  +44  87
  2 Department of Administration            42  23   9  10   91   47  +44  78
  3 Asyluum                                 42  22   7  13  103   58  +45  73
  4 Un Chien Andalou School                 42  19  13  10   82   63  +19  70
  5 Faculty of Geodimensions                42  19  12  11   65   62   +3  69
  6 Black Mass College                      42  21   6  15   94   71  +23  69
  7 Gallileo College                        42  20   8  14   88   78  +10  68
  8 Uncertain College                       42  20   7  15   84   70  +14  67
  9 Faculty of UnHumanities                 42  18   9  15   85   73  +12  63
 10 Tamarindia College                      42  18   8  16   87   75  +12  62
 11 Titaniumsmith's                         42  17   9  16   89   82   +7  60
 12 Tommy Flowers School of Computing       42  17   7  18   79   91  -12  58
 13 Armageddon College                      42  17   6  19   84   82   +2  57
 14 Interdimensional Library Services       42  15   7  20   81   94  -13  52
 15 Canteen                                 42  15   7  20   67   79  -12  52
 16 Wight College of Sport Science          42  14   9  19   71   98  -27  51
 17 Portmuthian Naval College               42  14   8  20   85   92   -7  50
 18 School of Superstition Studies          42  12   8  22   58   90  -32  44
 19 Faculty of Membrane Sciences            42   9  15  18   50   76  -26  42
 20 Greek School of Economics               42  12   5  25   64  110  -46  41
 21 St. Isidore College of Cartography      42   9  14  19   44   70  -26  41
 22 School of Linguistics                   42  10   9  23   52   86  -34  39

Alumni Football League
Old Fellateins, of the School of Linguistics, surprised everyone with a dominating season, finishing ahead of favourites Old Tamarindians in some comfort. A disappointing season for the reigning Varsity Champions Old Calculators who drop to fifth and miss out on the Senior Championships. Old Apocalypticians plummet from a sedate mid-table finish to the bottom of the pile with their very own sporting armageddon.

Team            
  1 Old Fellateians             42  30   4   8  134   60  +74  94
  2 Old Tamarindians            42  25  10   7  103   52  +51  85
  3 Rear Admirals               42  25   9   8   98   61  +37  84
  4 Old Realists                42  25   7  10  109   82  +27  82
  5 Old Calculators             42  24   5  13   98   61  +37  77
  6 Humunculus Alumni           42  22   8  12   96   70  +26  74
  7 Old Geodimensionalists      42  21   6  15   87   74  +13  69
  8 Old Pandaemonians           42  15  14  13   83   79   +4  59
  9 Old Uncertaineians          42  16   8  18   66   66   +0  56
 10 Old Athleticians            42  15  11  16   75   92  -17  56
 11 Old Asyluuminarians         42  15  10  17   52   61   -9  55
 12 Old Adminerologists         42  15   9  18   66   81  -15  54
 13 Old Gourmeteleians          42  14  11  17   67   77  -10  53
 14 Old Tanguins                42  14   9  19   63   70   -7  51
 15 Old Gallileians             42  14   8  20   51   73  -22  50
 16 Old Cartographers           42  14   6  22   63   81  -18  48
 17 Old Economicals             42  13   7  22   71   99  -28  46
 18 Old Librarians              42  13   5  24   82  103  -21  44
 19 Ancient & Unjustifieds      42  13   4  25   68   82  -14  43
 20 Old Titans                  42  12   6  24   57   90  -33  42
 21 Old Membraneians            42  10  10  22   65  101  -36  40
 22 Old Apocalypticians         42   7  13  22   54   93  -39  34

Students Union Football League
Students of Sixteen Bits retained their crown in remarkable fashion with a record points haul, leaving the Young Tamarindians in their wake. Cabin Boys, from the Portmuthian Naval College, showed some sign of their potential with a decent finish - look for more from them next season.

Team                   
  1 Students of Sixteen Bits            42  31   5   6  131   59  +72  98
  2 Young Tamarindians                  42  24   8  10   90   53  +37  80
  3 Library Apprentices                 42  22   7  13  102   83  +19  73
  4 Junior Theologians                  42  21   9  12   85   70  +15  72
  5 Titanium Juniors                    42  21   7  14   93   73  +20  70
  6 Cabin Boys                          42  21   5  16   87   60  +27  68
  7 Young UnHumans                      42  19   6  17   88   76  +12  63
  8 Young Tanguistas                    42  18   9  15   88   72  +16  63
  9 Young Membrane Scientists           42  17   8  17   73   87  -14  59
 10 Students of PE                      42  16   9  17   76   80   -4  57
 11 Kitchen Whippets                    42  15  11  16   77   81   -4  56
 12 Geodimensional Undergraduates       42  15  11  16   91   74  +17  56
 13 Young Gallileians                   42  15  10  17   62   72  -10  55
 14 Cartographic Juniors                42  16   6  20   67   73   -6  54
 15 Asyluum Inmates                     42  14  10  18   56   70  -14  52
 16 Cunning Linguists                   42  14   9  19   60   73  -13  51
 17 Young Lucifereians                  42  12  13  17   69   76   -7  49
 18 Young Horses of the Apocalypse      42  12  11  19   53   85  -32  47
 19 Office Juniors                      42  13   8  21   58   83  -25  47
 20 Students of Uncertainty             42  11  12  19   51   83  -32  45
 21 Economistas                         42  11   8  23   60   85  -25  41
 22 Young Surrealists                   42   9   8  25   59  108  -49  35

Haphazard Foundation First Division
Extramarine looked like the prime candidates throughout this campaign, deposing the champions Trench Brigade with something to spare, and Trench will be disappointed to miss out on the first Senior Championships after falling behind the Casuals on head-to-head results - with many quarters looking for a return to goa difference and goals scored as the primary deciders. Tragedy struck for four teams to suffer the first ever relegation, Nevervember Social Club a surprise and hapless Portsmouth FC never far from trouble.

Team                  
  1 Extramarine                  42  26   8   8   90   44  +46  86
  2 Arkham Asyluum               42  24   9   9   81   32  +49  81
  3 Búa's Boys FC                42  23   7  12  102   76  +26  76
  4 Wight Spit Casuals           42  22   7  13   92   68  +24  73
  5 Trench Brigade               42  22   7  13  110   80  +30  73
  6 Dada FC                      42  18  13  11   77   64  +13  67
  7 Haitiëns                     42  20   7  15  101   64  +37  67
  8 Holy Empire Heretics         42  19   9  14   81   80   +1  66
  9 Miskatonia                   42  20   4  18   96   66  +30  64
 10 Belushi Cartel               42  17   8  17   78   80   -2  59
 11 Saracen Assassins            42  17   6  19   78   84   -6  57
 12 Genocidees                   42  15  11  16   59   82  -23  56
 13 Haphazardistas               42  15   9  18   71   89  -18  54
 14 Accident & Emergency         42  14  12  16   71   58  +13  54
 15 Futilitarians                42  16   4  22   64   81  -17  52
 16 Stockett Brigade             42  13  10  19   58   68  -10  49
 17 Whelm Town Welfare           42  14   6  22   64   86  -22  48
 18 Solutionists                 42  13   8  21   75   88  -13  47
 19 CTE Refugees                 42  13   8  21   64   87  -23  47
 20 Portsmouth FC                42  11  11  20   55   76  -21  44
 21 El Narcos                    42  10   9  23   61  114  -53  39
 22 Nevervember Social Club      42   9   9  24   63  124  -61  36

Haphazard Foundation Second Division
FC Berserkr and Axle Tundra FC were the favourites for this inaugural season, with three of the promoted sides, especially Rosicruxxia, always on the favoured list. The real surprise, apart from Axle's indifferent campaign, was that of runner up Clunwardine Salopia, tipped for the basement and almost defying the odds to win the title, missing out on the final day of the season. At the bottom, Obsidian Fortress and Tamarindo FC were undoubtedly below expectation, while Despite Rovers will have to dramatically improve if they are to avoid relegation next season to the new Third Division.

Team                 
  1 Roscruxxia               42  25   7  10  102  57  +45  82
  2 Clunwardine Salopia      42  25   6  11  113  63  +50  81
  3 Sondry Hundred FC        42  22   8  12   99  65  +34  74
  4 Oroboros                 42  22   5  15  106  66  +40  71
  5 FC Berserkr              42  18  11  13   72  64   +8  65
  6 Icke FC                  42  19   6  17  104  95   +9  63
  7 Formicidaean             42  18   9  15   69  63   +6  63
  8 Crematorium              42  19   6  17   74  68   +6  63
  9 Zenegalesi               42  18   8  16   78  94  -16  62
 10 Vesuvian                 42  16  14  12   67  67   +0  62
 11 Tundra Axle FC           42  17  11  14   82  69  +13  62
 12 Asyluum Tangent          42  17   6  19   71  99  -28  57
 13 Vassago                  42  16   6  20   73  95  -22  54
 14 Kukalayans               42  14  12  16   75  80   -5  54
 15 Hvammstangi              42  14   9  19   67  89  -22  51
 16 Jelahi                   42  14   8  20   66  96  -30  50
 17 Narcosomnia              42  13  10  19   75  80   -5  49
 18 Tamarindo FC             42  12  12  18   78  78   +0  48
 19 Obsidian Fortress        42  13   8  21   75  94  -19  47
 20 Yudhishtra               42  13   8  21   61  75  -14  47
 21 Quasiquango              42  12   8  22   55  85  -30  44
 22 Despite Rovers           42  11  10  21   65  85  -20  43

by **Zarbli** » Thu Mar 08, 2012 11:59 am

League Report

Duke League XIX
Zarbli's Finest

The Clubs
(click the logo for the club`s kit)

Past DL Stats

SEASON	CHAMPION            RUNNER-UP	  3rd         4th       
 XVIII	Polar Zenith (3rd)  Romans	  Cross SC    Billiard       
  XVII	Cannibals (1st)	    Battle	  Warriors    Romans
   XVI  Battle (7th)	    Pyramid AC	  Billiard    Classics
    XV  Polar Zenith (2nd)  Battle        Knights     Cross SC
   XIV	Goyoreh (1st)	    Cannibals	  Battle      Polar Zenith
  XIII	Battle (6th)	    Billiard	  Pyramid AC  Polar Zenith
   XII	Billiard (3rd)	    Polar Zenith  Pyramid AC  Battle 
    XI	Romans (2nd)	    Polar Zenith  Asia FC     Knights
     X  Battle (5th)	    Romans	  Cross SC    Cannibals
    IX	Battle (4th)	    Warriors	  Asia FC     Knights
  VIII	Billiard (2nd)	    Battle	  Cannibals   Warriors
   VII	Battle (3rd)	    Billiard	  Romans      Pyramid AC
    VI	Battle (2nd)	    Polar Zenith  Warriors    Knights
     V  Romans (1st)	    Polar Zenith  Cannibals   Knights
    IV	Battle (1st)	    Knights       Romans      Pyramid AC
   III  Warriors (1st)	    Asia FC       Knights     Battle
    II  Polar Zenith (1st)  Knights       Cannibals   Asia FC
     I  Billiard (1st)      Cannibals     Warriors    Knights

Sweet Sixteen

Sixteen years ago, in a tense match against Cannibals, Warriors' now retired striker Valter Kanian scored a long distance shot right before the end of the match to give the Blue Stripes it's fist and only Duke League crown.

That crown is still the first, but the only not anymore. As the 19th Duke League comes to an end and after some years in the football limbo, Warriors were able to win the club's second crown, taking it once again to the city of Goyoreh, so far the only Zarblese city home to two different Duke League champions (Warriors and now disgraced Goyoreh).

The Blue Stripes won the crown after a long and tough run against Billiard, deciding the League with a 2-0 home victory against already relegated Sligdish in matchday 37.

Speaking of Billiard, the Vegas side ended up having ALMOST a great year: The Gamblers ALMOST won the International Cup and ALMOST wonthe Duke League. Well, at least they qualified for the TakilQuip Champions Cup, since their foe in the ZIC final - Battle - couldn't finish the DL among the top 5.

Following Billiard were the champion and runner-up of last season's DL, Polar Zenith and Romans. Joining them in the Glob Cup will be Pyramid AC, returning to a top position in the League.

In the bottom of the table, Knights and Asia FC repeated the terrible campaigns of last year, barely escaping degolation - I mean, relegation. Super, Sligdish, Yema! and Bloodthirsty Killers didn't have the same luck and will be playing the Marquis League next year.

Coming from the ML for next season will be in-and-out clubs TFC, Morphologic and Goyoreh, along with Watermen, that haven't played the DL in many years. Good luck traying to stay up!

The Title Match

vs

Warriors 2 x 0 Sligdish
Matchday 37

Final fixtures:

    Team                  P   W   D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1  Warriors		  38  21   9   8  76  46   30	72  Champion, TQCC
 2  Billiard		  38  20  11   7  48  29   19	71  TQCC
 3  Polar Zenith	  38  20   5  13  66  51   15	65  GC
 4  Romans		  38  18  10  10  54  34   20	64  GC
 5  Pyramid AC		  38  17  11  10  57  44   13	62  GC
 6  Classics		  38  17  10  11  33  29    4	61
 7  Balance		  38  18   6  14  40  38    2	60
 8  Cross SC		  38  16  11  11  53  38   15	59
 9  Battle		  38  15  14   9  72  48   24	59
10  Mountain Chain	  38  14  10  14  34  36   -2	52
11  Cannibals		  38  14   9  15  59  57    2	51
12  Drooler		  38  14   8  16  56  62   -6	50
13  Revolutionaries	  38  13   9  16  51  51    0	48
14  Brilliant		  38  12  11  15  34  44  -10	47
15  Knights		  38  11  13  14  33  44  -11	46
16  Asia FC		  38   9  14  15  34  47  -13	41
17  Super		  38  10   9  19  39  72  -33	39  Relegated
18  Sligdish		  38   9   7  22  36  53  -17	34  Relegated
19  Yema!		  38   8   9  21  35  59  -24	33  Relegated
20  Bloodthirsty Killers  38   8   6  24  45  73  -28	30  Relegated

Champion
Warriors

Marquis League XIX
Zarbli's Rising Stars

Final fixtures:

Pos Team                     P   W   D   L   GF   GA   GD  Pts
 1  TFC			     38	 20  12	  6  75	  41   34  72  Promoted, SBCC
 2  Watermen		     38	 22   5	 11  54	  44   10  71  Promoted, SBCC
 3  Morphologic		     38	 19  10	  9  61	  32   29  67  Promoted, SBCC
 4  Goyoreh		     38	 18  11	  9  59	  31   28  65  Promoted, SBCC
 5  Zug-Zug		     38	 18  11	  9  46	  31   15  65
 6  Union		     38	 17  12	  9  38	  23   15  63
 7  Endoplasmatic Reticulum  38	 18   7	 13  44	  32   12  61
 8  Lichen		     38	 18   7	 13  42	  33    9  61
 9  Imperial FC		     38	 17  10	 11  63	  51   12  61
10  Lunar		     38	 16  11	 11  44	  33   11  59
11  Coconut Trees	     38	 16   8	 14  35	  27    8  56
12  Banzai		     38	 13  10	 15  64	  80  -16  49
13  Jungle Club		     38	 13   6	 19  40	  58  -18  45
14  Greenhouse Bastards	     38	 11   9	 18  42	  46   -4  42
15  Flame		     38	 11   9	 18  41	  67  -26  42
16  Mobsters		     38	 12   5	 21  58	  81  -23  41
17  Xegei		     38	 10   9	 19  28	  49  -21  39  Relegated
18  Hot AC		     38	 10   8	 20  61	  69   -8  38  Relegated
19  Waxing Moon Mages	     38	  7   7	 24  16	  43  -27  28  Relegated
20  Lion Rampant Or	     38	  7   7	 24  46	  86  -40  28  Relegated

Count League XVIII
Tomorrow's Powerhouses

Final fixtures:

Pos Team                P   W    D   L  GF  GA   GD  Pts
 1  Yo Mama Disagrees	38  22	 7   9	66  34	 32  73  Promoted
 2  Discoverer		38  21	 7  10	57  30	 27  70  Promoted
 3  AA Pedro Prado	38  20  10   8	61  40	 21  70  Promoted
 4  Quicksand		38  21	 5  12	63  46	 17  68  Promoted
 5  New Athenian	38  18  11   9	58  30	 28  65
 6  Colosseum		38  18	 9  11	53  39	 14  63
 7  Supervillains	38  17	 7  14	33  29	  4  58
 8  Blackdogs		38  16	 9  13	69  56	 13  57
 9  Snowflake		38  16	 9  13	29  27	  2  57
10  4 University	38  16	 8  14	34  27	  7  56
11  House Cikone	38  15  11  12	38  32	  6  56
12  Demigods		38  14  12  12	59  46	 13  54
13  Fightown Patriots	38  17	 2  19	49  58	 -9  53
14  Hamlet FC		38  16	 5  17	42  43	 -1  53
15  Ganbarimasu		38  11	 9  18	24  41	-17  42
16  Pitibirikas' Nekas	38  12	 5  21	30  45	-15  41
17  Aries		38  12	 5  21	64  83	-19  41  Classificfication upon National Championship's results
18  Cruzaders		38  10	 8  20	42  73	-31  38  Classificfication upon National Championship's results
19  Kalvin FC		38   7	 9  22	46  90	-44  30  Classificfication upon National Championship's results
20  Union Heart FC	38   3	 8  27	20  68	-48  17  Classificfication upon National Championship's results

Qualification for International Competitions

TQCC
1. Warriors
2. Billiard

GC
1. Polar Zenith
2. Romans
3. Pyramid AC

CYG
Battle

SBCC
1. TFC
2. Watermen
3. Morphologic
4. Goyoreh

by **Ossidiacqua** » Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:21 pm

The concluding half of the 315th Acquan Campiocinato...

A-Liga Standings

    Team                               P   W   D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Qolo-Qolo                         38  21  13   4  82  39  +43  76
  2 CA Conquistadores                 38  22   6  10  69  40  +29  72
  3 Condensadores CD                  38  21   8   9  89  47  +42  71
  4 Caballeros CF                     38  21   6  11  78  49  +29  69
  5 AS Débardeurs Nationale           38  18  13   7  45  32  +13  67
  6 Clube Cobreloa                    38  18   9  11  37  27  +10  63
  7 Unión Gimignano CF                38  16   9  13  52  54   -2  57
  8 Internazionale                    38  17   6  15  50  52   -2  57
  9 Académica di Terrabianco          38  17   6  15  52  49   +3  57
 10 Olimpico Oasi SS                  38  16   6  16  39  46   -7  54
 11 FC Sommieres Hibernia             38  12  13  13  57  54   +3  49
 12 Clube Esporte de Penthesilea      38  13  10  15  38  40   -2  49
 13 Mineros di Collindiana FC         38  11  11  16  29  40  -11  44
 14 RC Vitória de Cavasco             38  11  10  17  48  63  -15  43
 15 Atletico Sant'Elia                38  12   6  20  47  59  -12  42
 16 RC de Mallerosa                   38   9  12  17  38  62  -24  39
 17 Ossidianense CF                   38  11   5  22  47  77  -30  38
 18 Unione Industriali CF             38   7  16  15  35  50  -15  37
 19 Estudiantes CRF                   38   7  14  17  27  51  -24  35
 20 CD Parquisteres                   38   7   7  24  29  57  -28  28



CAMPIOCINATO CHAMPIONS: QOLO-QOLO (47th title)

It would appear that Qolo-Qolo's lead was just too big to be eaten up, and whilst Clube Cobreloa fans will be disappointed to see their teams slip and slide down to sixth come the final final whistle, Qolo-Qolo fans are ecstatic, so congratulations to them! And good luck to them, too, as they go forwards to compete in the Champions' Cup, and the inaugural Four Planets Cup, being arranged by the authorities in Falconfar. Football fans around the nation rolled their eyes as they realised that the 'big four' occupied the top four positions yet again, but Débardeurs Nationale and Clube Cobreloa appear to be closing the gap bit by gradual bit. FC Sommieres Hibernia and Clube Esporte de Penthesilea more than held their own in the end, and we must say goodbye to CD Parquisteres, Estudiantes CRF, Unione Industriala CF, and Ossidianense CF.

Player of the Season:
1. Sebastian Cordero (Qolo-Qolo)
2. Ricardo Velasquez (CA Conquistadores)
3. Antonin Schettina (Qolo-Qolo)
4. Massimiliano Antuofermo (Condensadores CD)
5. Alexis Giammarttini (Caballeros CF)

B-Liga Standings

    Team                            P   W   D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 SS Clube Vortice               38  22   8   8  68  41  +27  74
  2 Magisterio AC                  38  20  14   4  61  22  +39  74
  3 AS Universidad Tecnico         38  22   6  10  55  35  +20  72
  4 Olympique Elbegna              38  21   7  10  48  33  +15  70
  5 RCD San Marco                  38  19   8  11  58  46  +12  65
  6 Atletico de Lux FC             38  19   6  13  49  42   +7  63
  7 Ciudad de Sant'Antioco         38  18   5  15  64  44  +20  59
  8 Juventud di Campenza           38  15  13  10  50  37  +13  58
  9 AS Clube Toros                 38  17   6  15  45  38   +7  57
 10 Cattedrale di Vincenze         38  14  14  10  39  30   +9  56
 11 Stade Olimpico FC              38  12  13  13  37  39   -2  49
 12 SC Excurstionistas di Vul      38  12  12  14  42  45   -3  48
 13 Racing Paresta                 38  11  12  15  25  30   -5  45
 14 CD Cerro Nero Aglaura          38  13   3  22  45  83  -38  42
 15 Union Comerciale SC            38  10   8  20  39  70  -31  38
 16 Atletico Corinthians SC        38   8  14  16  40  52  -12  38
 17 Atletico Sanvene CF            38   9   9  20  38  60  -22  36
 18 Berenice-Fedora                38   9   9  20  35  50  -15  36
 19 Citta de Montevento            38   7  14  17  29  42  -13  35
 20 Union Amicale CF               38   6  11  21  27  55  -28  29

Berenice-Fedora and Citta de Montevento are two surprises here, both having seasons to forget as the one-time promotion challengers both slip to embarrassing relegations. Atletico Sanvene and the hapless Union Amicale will join them in the drop. The big story is at the top, however, where the division that everyone thought would be a scrap between RCD San Marco and Magisterio AC turned into a victory on head to heads for SS Clube Vortice. Too many draws and not enough goals turned out to be the undoing of Magisterio in that title hunt, but at least they will bounce right back, something RCD San Marco couldn't do, leaving one of the biggest and best supported clubs in the country in the second tier for another season. Also going up and in the SBCC are Olympique Elbegna and Universidad Tecnico.

C-Liga Standings

    Team                          P   W   D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Alianza Inca FS              46  24  15   7  62  33  +29  87
  2 Sporting Villafretta         46  25  10  11  81  50  +31  85
  3 Stade Portomonti             46  25   9  12  82  51  +31  84
  4 CF Independiente             46  23  14   9  56  36  +20  83
  5 Pro Libertas                 46  20  15  11  72  47  +25  75
  6 Palmeiras di Asti SS         46  18  20   8  64  46  +18  74
  7 Arquilio de Regatas          46  20  14  12  71  55  +16  74
  8 San Antonio Vitesse          46  17  19  10  42  34   +8  70
  9 UC Doria                     46  17  19  10  44  30  +14  70
 10 Esportivo Portocruz CF       46  19  12  15  47  41   +6  69
 11 FC Vittoria d'Ossidiana      46  19  11  16  47  37  +10  68
 12 Recreativo Parquistolos      46  17  12  17  77  66  +11  63
 13 Regatas de Campo FC          46  18   8  20  43  57  -14  62
 14 CR Atletico Villacqua        46  16  13  17  40  42   -2  61
 15 Stade Sant'Arcangelo         46  14  11  21  27  46  -19  53
 16 Villafretta Rio Juniors      46  11  18  17  41  48   -7  51
 17 Gimnasia d'Aguilos SC        46  12  15  19  42  50   -8  51
 18 CA Odysseus Old Boys         46  12  12  22  57  93  -36  48
 19 CR d'Arcangelo               46  10  18  18  41  47   -6  48
 20 Il Djocoranga CR             46  12  11  23  45  65  -20  47
 21 Atletico Clube de Pax        46  11  14  21  22  42  -20  47
 22 Racing Santa Elena           46  11  12  23  43  64  -21  45
 23 Deportivo Arquilio UC        46  11  11  24  42  74  -32  44
 24 Campenza Fe FC               46   7  13  26  43  77  -34  34

The top four raced away with things in C-Liga yet again, with Pro Libertas eight points adrift of the promotion pace in fifth by the end of the season. Alianza Inca are the team going up, racing away with it in the end before some nerves in the last few matches almost allowed Sporting Villafretta and Stade Portomonti to catch them up. CF Independiente will be thrilled to gain promotion. And after being fifth last season, Campenza Fe find themselves ten points adrift in last place. Somehow...

Semi Finals
AS Débardeurs Nationale 1-1 Académica di Terrabianco (1-1 agg)
Académica di Terrabianco 2-3 AS Débardeurs Nationale (3-4 agg)

RC de Mallerosa 6-1 Caballeros CF (6-1 agg)
Caballeros CF 7-1 RC de Mallerosa (8-7 agg)

Final
AS Débardeurs Nationale 3-0 Caballeros CF[/i]

After one of the most remarkable second leg comebacks in Acquan history, Caballeros CF win the chance to defend their title. It is not to be, however, and AS Débardeurs Nationale provide a wonderful performance in the final to outclass their cross-city rivals in every deparment, winning 3-0 in the end. Congratulations to them, let's hope they enjoy the Cygnus Cup spot.

INTERNATIONAL QUALIFIERS
Champions' Cup: Qolo-Qolo
Globe Cup: CA Conquistadores, Condensadores CD, Caballeros CF
SBCC: SS Clube Vortice, Magisterio AC, AS Universidad Tecnico, Olympique Elbegna
Cygnus Cup: AS Débardeurs Nationale

STADIUM BID: - Champions' Cup Final, Il Colosseo - 103,450 (Sant'Elia)
An archaic stone construction in the centre of Sant'Elia, Il Colosseo is a national landmark in Ossidiacqua, as important to the national psyche as any other. Lit by oil lamps and featuring vast walls of stained glass, it seats 103,450 and is a treasured by the Acquans, being one of the first building built following the eradication of la Plaga, as the nation began to reinvent itself during the Pause Time. With help from the international community, it has undergone extensive renovations, and whilst retaining its archaic charm, is now a fully modern stadium fit for international competition.

Whilst they made an over-eager bid for the final last season that turned out to be illegal, organisers continue to believe it would be something of a coup for the relatively shaky-on-its-feet nation of Ossidiacqua to capture the CC final for its home soil, and it would be treated as very much a shop window for the nation to show the international community what it can do.

by **Aguazul** » Thu Mar 08, 2012 9:56 pm

Aguazul wrote:There's something serendipitious about how this [movement between the fourth and fifth divisions] has all worked out at least as far as making the tables look quasirealistic, and I bet I just jinxed it.

You fool. What have you done?

On the other hand, guys like Nadol are clearly not the only standouts on the national team. Because they win on penalty kicks.

Right, setting that aside, let's go and think about some tournaments where we don't have to worry about Falcon this and Falcon that and Falcon the other thing. Please.

International competition

Mapabore Juventud didn't look like they were on any kind of a downswing. At least at first. Then they met Gimnasia and got comfortably shut out, twice. But Gimnasia are pretty decent. Usually. Ciervos de Granagua, the random Copa runners-up, beat Garrincha FC and oh hey I think I know what that's alluding to now. But they would go on to lose to Halcones de Maracaibo, and oh hey, I think that means...um...you don't even want to know what that's alluding to. Okay. Blén CA beat Rennes Youth Academy, but then lost to Heidelstadt Falken, and oh hey that's...oh come on!

Universidad de Dénprade would beat more Kernansquillecan kids but then lost to Urologists (that can't have been pleasant). CA Condadore beat Club Stein-los behind three away goals, because some things tend not to change. In a meeting of recent champions, Unión de Ciudagua and FKM split their group stage games but Unión edged out FKM and Vliegende Beigners FC. Meanwhile, Ojedo Cerro advanced past Psychiatrists and Gimnasia (who had the best defense of the group stage. Ha.) Also AC Mineros tied with some Haxors...oh, just Hoxford Rovers then. Boo. Condadore came last, but Belgium FC didn't make it through either, so neener, and Mapabore Juventud topped their group. Um. Yeah. They look...like...a good team! Which, I don't even know.

Unión de Ciudagua went out to the Sonoma Center Panthers, while Ojedo Cerro advanced on penalty kicks, with Filip Bosc's penalty the only one missed. They then lost to the Impact, but at least kept it competitive, so that was probably good. Mineros went out in the first round, but Mapabore were eliminated after defeating...Heidelstadt Falken. Not again! Seriously!

Exhaling...

Two strikes from, oh yeah let's remind ourselves, nobody knows who this team is because they're not even in the top flight, got FC Nacional past Jungle Strike FC. (Also, they're in the third division. Not the second, but we're going to chalk that one up to poetic license. It's already making the rounds of some domestic stadiums, with various but all suitably-embarrassing feminine rhymes in the third stanza.)

Then came the "first round."

Let's remember, after all, that FC Nacional got here by winning the second leg of the semifinal, 9-1 over Loseis XI. Apparently Iñigo Núñez has seven goals among the two matches, together. I can only say, you probably need a really concentrated dose of Cabañas effect to pull that off. (A quick glance down the, intermittently extant, roster reveals the presences of Salvadór Géigel (central midfield!) and Castañon Echevarría, so...yes.

Although Loseis XI have a Gómez Andújar, so that really doesn't explain everything.)

They went out, on away goal, and Arellano's coping methods are detailed elsewhere. Meanwhile, 12 de noviembre are ever-annoying despite this being their first entry into the competition. Nadol is finally figuring out how to score goals on his own, even at the club level. (Maybe it's just the league that's an issue?)

And then they won the trophy. And brought it home. Eventually. Kind of. Long story.

You can look it up, but personally I'm going to take a break and cover the international transactions, which had better not involve any members of the genus Falco...

oh you have got to be kidding me.

"Hello. Hello? While our play-by-play announcer broods over the doings of Cednia Beach FC, this is, er. This is García Amendola of the football association. With an important announcement. I mean Unión should let everyone have a fighting chance and FC Nacional should play like you know what you're doing. But more importantly. Ferrocarril Terra Bayas. And Bueyes de Wabigama if there are any of you still around and not being hacked to pieces. Please...stop...taking each other's places. One of each of you is enough. No more, no less. And for goodness' sakes let's have a sensible playoff system. Please?

All right. Are you okay? Can you start announcing again?"

Yes. I'm fine. For now. Thanks, by the way. I do appreciate it.

Primera División

⁠⁠   Team                          P   W  D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Unión de Ciudagua            18  12  4   2  49  23  +26  40 C/CC
 2 ICD Villago                  18   8  5   5  17  14   +3  29 CC
 3 Alianza Ciruelas             18   8  5   5  21  20   +1  29 CC
 4 Universidad de Dénprade      18   7  6   5  34  30   +4  27 GC
 5 CA Condadore                 18   7  4   7  25  25   +0  25 GC
 6 12 de noviembre              18   7  4   7  18  23   -5  25 GC
 7 Blén CA                      18   5  7   6  15  17   -2  22
 8 Ojedo Cerro                  18   3  9   6  18  24   -6  18
 9 San Pablo                    18   3  7   8  22  34  -12  16 Relegated
10 Mapabore Juventud            18   2  5  11  14  23   -9  11 Playoffs

Well.

Unión de Ciudagua looked dominant, again, and everyone's kind of bracing for more dominance, etc. Cobo looks smug. Etc.

Um. Are there any consistent...Pumas are not good. There's one thing. Condadore's...defense is as bad as last seasons and their offense is worse, so they're down one spot. Swapping with Dénprade, who are just on the attack and having fun. They're, um, they have a new stadium now! Yes. Because we build new stadiums if our lines have encroached too little or whatever. Cause we care about football or whatever. And you know what? So do Ciruelas. Yeah. With a roof! A retractable one!

And...also...the radical republicans. Whose defense is actually worse than last season too, when they managed to score a goal per game. Now? They're just leaning back and annoying the heck out of the rest of the league. Goals on counterattacks, mostly. It's something else.

Um. Rule 12 is very much in effect. Ojedo Cerro...have a new manager, and will probably find themselves in the market for a new new manager if this keeps up. And Mapabore...you know what? Maybe there's just chaos in the boardroom, wouldn't be the first time. Half the people backed Parrera, half didn't, the fans grew skeptical, someone realized this is the problem with democracy and all that messiness, and they're currently in turmoil. Yeah, that sounds about right.

For all that they still beat Condadore once, though. That's Condadore for you.

Segunda División

⁠⁠   Team                       P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 AC Mineros                18 10  4  4  25  12  +13  34 Champions/Promoted/SBCC
 2 Fábricas                  18  8  9  1  28  17  +11  33 Playoffs/SBCC
 3 CD Quemavilla             18  7  4  7  31  26   +5  25 SBCC
 4 Estudiantes de Íguen      18  7  4  7  15  19   -4  25 SBCC/Relegated
 5 Deportivo Peralta         18  8  1  9  27  32   -5  25
 6 CF Clan Tropa             18  6  5  7  16  16   +0  23
 7 Arcrés Millos             18  6  5  7  24  29   -5  23
 8 Trecelunas FC             18  5  6  7  18  19   -1  21
 9 CSD Trecelunas            18  5  6  7  15  20   -5  21
10 Ciervos de Granagua       18  2  8  8  13  22   -9  14 Playoffs

Let's remember, last time around AC Mineros and Fábricas (and CF Clan Tropa) were all tied on points at the top. Now? Mineros edge out Fábricas by one point to take the overall title, CF Clan Tropa contrive to blow another chance, and did anyone really want to stay up? Trecelunas FC finish on 44 points, Arcrés Millos on 43, CSD Trecelunas and Deportivo Peralta 42 each, Ciervos de "your cup finalists, let's remember, people," Granagua 41.

Estudiantes de Íguen 40 and they're going to the SBCC. By one more goal than Depor, granted, but come on!

Otras Divisiones

Tercera División

⁠⁠   Team                          P   W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 2 de abril                   18  11  4  3  21  12   +9  37 Promoted
 2 Piratas de Grisolon          18  10  4  4  26  17   +9  34 Playoffs
 3 FC Nacional                  18   9  3  6  27  23   +4  30
 4 Deportes Cobrelunas          18   6  8  4  14  14   +0  26
 5 Club Mineros de Arceque      18   6  6  6  16  16   +0  24
 6 Independiente Peralta        18   5  7  6  15  17   -2  22
 7 Parque de San Luis           18   5  4  9  19  19   +0  19
 8 Destello                     18   4  6  8  18  19   -1  18
 9 Lobernians                   18   5  3 10  13  21   -8  18 Relegated
10 Ciudad de San Pedro          18   4  5  9  16  27  -11  17 Playoffs

Quarta División

⁠⁠   Team                          P   W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Loseis XI                    18  13  3  2  49  16  +33  42 Promoted
 2 Deportes Rofi                18   9  2  7  34  33   +1  29 Playoffs (down)
 3 FC Manzalle                  18   7  6  5  23  22   +1  27
 4 Ladrones de Río Cascada      18   7  6  5  25  21   +4  27
 5 Vista del Oeste              18   7  5  6  20  19   +1  26
 6 Ave Maria                    18   6  7  5  35  33   +2  25 Playoffs (up)
 7 Atlético Cerabos             18   6  2 10  31  46  -15  20
 8 Ferrocarril Terra Bayas      18   4  7  7  22  33  -11  19
 9 Jóquey de Morbeza            18   4  5  9  18  21   -3  17
10 Espíritu Santo               18   3  5 10  15  28  -13  14

⁠⁠   Team                                  P   W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Celeritas                            14  11  2  1  24   9  +15  35 Bracket
 2 Dan Parche                           14   8  2  4  21  11  +10  26
 3 Victoria                             14   6  5  3  15  12   +3  23
 4 Cornejas de San Pablo del Norte      14   6  3  5   9   9   +0  21
 5 Delfines de Estuario y Bosque        14   5  2  7  16  24   -8  17
 6 Lago Erasmo XI                       14   4  4  6   9   9   +0  16
 7 Clan Tropa Juventud                  14   3  3  8  13  19   -6  12
 8 Cristal FC                           14   1  3 10   7  21  -14   6 Relegated

Promoted: Santa Fe

⁠⁠   Team                       P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Leones de Mariscal        14  8  4  2  20   6  +14  28 Bracket
 2 Subfusiles de Mará        14  8  3  3  29  14  +15  27
 3 Ondinas del Terrazul      14  6  4  4  13   9   +4  22
 4 Dragones de Alinero       14  5  4  5  14  12   +2  19
 5 Cerro Galpón              14  5  3  6  17  15   +2  18
 6 Santa Maria               14  4  4  6  20  19   +1  16
 7 CD Victoria               14  3  6  5  16  28  -12  15
 8 Centro del Esquivo        14  2  2 10  13  39  -26   8 Relegated

Promoted: Pipiedra FC

⁠⁠   Team                          P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Biesperanza                  14  9  3  2  19   6  +13  30 Bracket
 2 Bueyes de Wabigama           14  8  2  4  23  13  +10  26
 3 Navidad FC                   14  7  4  3  20  19   +1  25
 4 Santos David                 14  7  3  4  22  17   +5  24
 5 CA Caña                      14  6  5  3  19  11   +8  23
 6 Senolugar Sol                14  3  3  8  23  28   -5  12
 7 Sombrero de Estaño           14  1  5  8  13  32  -19   8
 8 Aves del Norte               14  1  3 10   8  21  -13   6 Relegated

Promoted: Pelícanos Maravillosos

⁠⁠  Team                           P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Valejano del Oeste FC         14  9  2  3  24   9  +15  29 RRT
 2 Bovinos del Pueblo Jaime      14  8  3  3  19   7  +12  27
 3 Fuerza Honhausen              14  8  2  4  22  20   +2  26
 4 Río Rojo                      14  6  4  4  18  14   +4  22
 5 Mainat Magia                  14  5  3  6  18  22   -4  18
 6 Valle del Río Rojo            14  4  2  8  12  15   -3  14
 7 Lago del Espíritu             14  3  2  9  10  27  -17  11
 8 Edén                          14  2  4  8   6  15   -9  10

⁠⁠   Team                            P  W  D  L For  Ag  +/- Pts
 1 Estrellas de Pueblagua         14  9  1  4  40  18  +22  28 RRT
 2 6 de noviembre                 14  8  3  3  29  12  +17  27
 3 Expos de Miguel                14  7  3  4  21  23   -2  24
 4 Rojos                          14  6  3  5  21  18   +3  21
 5 Universidad de Arroyandos      14  6  3  5  26  25   +1  21
 6 Pedro Libertad                 14  3  4  7  13  20   -7  13
 7 Rio Canoa                      14  4  1  9  17  27  -10  13
 8 Ciudad de Sufuérte             14  2  4  8  14  38  -24  10

⁠⁠   Team                           P  W  D  L For  Ag +/- Pts
 1 Espejo de Isla Esperanza      14  8  1  5  23  14  +9  25 RRT
 2 Swifttown Travelers           14  6  6  2  13   8  +5  24
 3 Swifttown Excursionistas      14  5  5  4  14  12  +2  20
 4 Puerto Independencia          14  5  5  4  11  10  +1  20
 5 Fuerte Sur FC                 14  5  4  5  15  16  -1  19
 6 Puerto Ágape Industrial       14  5  3  6  15  20  -5  18
 7 Port Lever FC                 14  4  4  6  15  20  -5  16
 8 Isla Fe Marinos               14  2  4  8  10  16  -6  10

Do you see my parenthetical comments? Because that's how bad this season was.

Um. Okay. Valejano del Oeste won the RRT. That worked out. And then in the bracket...they beat Leones de Mariscal in the final. This is exactly what we were trying to not have happen.

So. Valejano del Oeste go up. Jóquey de Morbeza, who are actually almost their derby rivals despite the fact that only one of them plays in the actual country of Aguazul really cannot be relegated to the foreign leagues, so they stay up, the fourth division expands to eleven teams and the corresponding fifth division contracts to seven, cup seeding is going to suck, someone from the fourth will be essentially in the fifth, and Leones de Mariscal have to play Deportes Rofi despite the latter being second in the Clausura. Maybe the CMSC had it right all along. Maybe any sort of regional discrimination is due to failure and we should all just forget about playing football with the people nearby us, and let the wonders of the internet do...

um...

something.

Seriously, this league.

Playoffs to come after the cup, because foreshadowing.

Stadium bids:
Bids: Champions’ Cup: "Estadio Unión de Ciudagua"

It is located in Ciudagua. It seats 70,000. You may be aware of this.

Best souvenir stands? Second deck, almost completely on the home side of the field, if you're literate and like those glossy media guides. For overpriced jerseys, which is what they're bribing me to advertise, first deck, just towards the away end; they've put in even more workers than usual so presumably the lines should move faster but actually it's just going to be more hectic and crowded.

Globe Cup: "Estadio Wakande," Ciruelas, 40,000

Known as "Estadio Peluque" most of the time. One of the new stadia. It has a retractable roof! Which actually is not a big deal in Ciruelas these days because the precipitation is not so bad, unless you're like afraid of a little acid rain or whatever. The surrounding area is Ciruelas, which is kind of gentrified. There used to be, in fact, an old Estadio Monumental Antonio Wakande. This almost certainly makes Ciruelas the first of our clubs to have had three different home stadia whose names we bothered to look up.

SBCC: Estadio Pomorum, Rofi, 40,000

Very artsy bathrooms, and by artsy we mean has graffiti. Conversations ongoing include which beer brought you there, bets on where Aguazul will invade next, and how people from the Supercentro are morons (by an objective standard, they probably are, though you can say little better for Rofi's inhabitants).

First Round:

Ugh. Valejano del Oeste, everyone dislikes you now. It's a good thing...I really don't care if his name is Juan de la Cruz, I really don't give a rip...scored in extra time, otherwise you'd have preempted even more programming. Also Universidad de Arroyandos are pretty good and don't need to wait for extra time.
Second Round:

This cup...okay, Arroyandos go out of it, to Unión de Ciudagua, fine, whatever. The disparity between leagues grows to increasingly moronic levels, as CD "not even in the top flight" Quemavilla take down Centro del "are admittedly going right back down to the sixth" Esquivo with, um, eight goals total from, if you must know, Ordoño Bernabé. After being kept to association footballesque scores by Trecelunas FC, Ave Maria find an extra-time winner from Sancha Calvo, and Mapabore Juventud are left without a "well they were fighting on the cup front" excuse, losing both legs to Fábricas.

Third Round:

A Ciudagua derby, with 12 de noviembre putting away their tiny neighbors who'd impressively taken down Deportivo Peralta on penalty kicks. Pumas excuseless also after getting hammered by nobodies Atlético Cerabos, Ciervos de Granagua get by Fábricas on an Angel Moya extra-time shot, and two simultaneous hat tricks for Arcrés Millos turn things around after a road upset.

Fourth Round:

Give Ciervos credit where it's due, they're looking good in extra time now. Jorge Ledesma finds the winner this time around. And Blén CA put away the radical republicans. (These sides played in the third division together. Now look at 'em.)

Quarterfinals:
FC Nacional 0-5 CD Quemavilla (0-5 agg)
CD Quemavilla 1-0 FC Nacional (6-0 agg)

CSD Trecelunas 0-0 Blén CA (0-0 agg)
Blén CA 0-0 CSD Trecelunas (0-0 AET, 0-0 agg, 1-2 PKs)

Ciervos de Granagua 0-0 CA Condadore (0-0 agg)
CA Condadore 0-0 Ciervos de Granagua (0-0 AET, 0-0 agg, 3-1 PKs)

Ojedo Cerro 0-0 Unión de Ciudagua (0-0 agg)
Unión de Ciudagua 2-3 Ojedo Cerro (2-3 agg)

Condadore in refusing-to-be-made-upset-victims shocker, Tiko Logan looking strong in goal. Whoever's in charge of Ojedo Cerro...Andrés Meligini...has something vaguely decent to be proud of, although he's looking over his shoulder nervously. Two more shutouts for Quemavilla, who only gave up one in their last two-legged affair.

Semifinals:
CD Quemavilla 3-2 CSD Trecelunas (3-2 agg)
CSD Trecelunas 1-2 CD Quemavilla (3-5 agg)

CA Condadore 3-2 Ojedo Cerro (3-2 agg)
Ojedo Cerro 1-0 CA Condadore (1-1 AET, 3-4 agg)

Condadore get their upset now, Antonio Luis Pitillas finding the winner (drawer, admittedly) in extra time. Also more lower division teams keep doing stuff.

Final:
CD Quemavilla 3-0 CA Condadore

So CD Quemavilla, who actually are in the second division, will go to the Cygnus Cup.

As for those playoffs.

Deportes Rofi 2-2 Leones de Mariscal
(Leones de Mariscal 1-1 Deportes Rofi)
(Deportes Rofi 3-3 Leones de Mariscal)
(Leones de Mariscal 0-1 Deportes Rofi)

Deportes remember just a bit aggrieved at having to be in the playoffs anyway. They're too busy exhaling now to fuss more, though. Also remember when we talked about maybe going into penalties? Yeah that didn't happen.

Ciudad de San Pedro 1-1 Ave Maria
(Ave Maria 1-1 Ciudad de San Pedro)
(Ciudad de San Pedro 2-1 Ave Maria)
Ciervos de Granagua 0-2 Piratas de Grisolon
Mapabore Juventud 0-1 Fábricas

More pleasantries for the Rofi metropolitan area.

But Mapabore? Seriously? To Fábricas again. Hate that when that happens.

by **Harjeland** » Fri Mar 09, 2012 12:12 pm

H A R J E L A N D

Inaugural Season

1. Ligaen Standings

    Team                            P   W  D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Knattspyrnufélag Stríðsær      22  15  2   5  39  21  +18  47 TQCC
  2 HK Fjóllbærin                  22  14  4   4  41  24  +17  46 GC
  3 Íþróttafélag Strímstraður      22  11  4   7  34  21  +13  37 GC
  4 Knattspyrnufélag Bolúvík       22  11  1  10  36  36   +0  34
  5 HF Völnarinn                   22   7  8   7  23  22   +1  29
  6 FC Brynúvík                    22   8  5   9  19  27   -8  29
  7 Íþróttafélag Ráfnavík          22   8  3  11  18  26   -8  27
  8 FC Bolúvík 58                  22   7  6   9  22  30   -8  27
  9 Íþróttabandalag Árnær          22   7  5  10  32  35   -3  26
 10 HF Strímstraður                22   7  5  10  25  29   -4  26
 11 Stormur Bolúvík                22   6  5  11  26  31   -5  23 Relegated
 12 Kráfinn FC                     22   4  6  12  24  37  -13  18 Relegated

Champion:

Knattspyrnufélag Stríðsær (1st title)

HBU National Cup

Champion: Knattspyrnufélag Bolúvík (1st title)

by **The Babbage Islands** » Fri Mar 09, 2012 4:19 pm

50a Futbala Ĉampionado de Babaĝoj

League Overview

After a period of turmoil in domestic Babbage football, a new league claims pride of place in the islands. The FFB Premier League is consigned to history, as is the concept of relegation. Instead, fourteen clubs now have permanent berths in the first division, renamed Futbala Ĉampionado de Babaĝoj (Esperanto for Football Championship of The Babbage Islands).

Greenville Rovers won the first season of the FĈB, the 49th championship of the Islands. Below is a look at the fourteen clubs as they enter the historic 50th national professional football championship.

BELGIUM FC
City: Belgium, Daimler (79,923).
Stadium: Memorial Park (42,357).
Championships: Seven; 30, 31, 32, 33, 37, 38, 48.
Cups: Four; four times runner-up.
Peak UICA rank: 26.
Main Sponsor: Owners Chip and Kirsten Woods.
Manager: Arna-Maggra o Wirrenne (Bears Armed).
Colours: Orange, green, white.
Nickname(s): Orange, The Crew.
TBI Internationals: Sweeper Nancy Svoboda, midfielder Fang Wuying, striker Courtney Keisler.
Foreign Players: Centre back Pepe Raúl Corretja (Aguazul), keeper Marra o Mara, forward Harroya o SarnDale, defender Summarra SilverBear, midfielder Ruth Silberstein and winger Hirra Swiftly (all Bears Armed).
Historic Players: Allison Salamida and the "Dagan Five", Jeremy McAllister, Jr., Kelli Alder.
Last Season: 4th.
Prediction: 3rd. Anything from first to sixth would not surprise with this emotional bunch.

BLOOMFIELD NATIONAL
City: Bloomfield, Verne (122,651).
Stadium: Callahan & Babcock Arena (39,275).
Championships: Five; 25, 26, 39, 42, 47.
Cups: Four; thrice runner-up.
Peak UICA rank: 96.
Main Sponsor: Callahan & Babcock (retail).
Manager: Orson Cook.
Colours: Royal blue, white.
Nickname(s): National, Eagles.
TBI Internationals: Keeper Jerome Patterson, forward Kristine Lindquist.
Foreign Players: None.
Historic Players: Patty Heatherly, Marc Ducharme, Debbie Sherman.
Last Season: 7th.
Prediction: 7th again. Talented but getting old. Losing Gene Heath was a blow to long-term growth.

DOVER CITY
City: Dover, Cayley (277,219).
Stadium: Whitecliff Stadium (56,400). Hosted the World Cup 54 final.
Championships: Eight; 1, 2, 4, 8, 10, 22, 27, 34.
Cups: Four; four times runner-up.
Peak UICA rank: 92.
Main Sponsor: Blue Skies Aeronautics (aviation).
Manager: Tim Reynolds.
Colours: Black, gold.
Nickname(s): City, Flyers.
TBI Internationals: Striker Jennifer Stevens, striker Genaro Girón Alvarado.
Foreign Players: None.
Historic Players: Magnus Svoboda, Tegan Nash, Elizabeth Hanna, Glen Brown.
Last Season: 5th.
Prediction: 4th. In the hunt, but not deep enough to win their ninth.

FAR POINT ISLANDERS
City: Far Point, North Island (209,131).
Stadium: Centennial Stadium (26,900).
Championships: Four; 6, 9, 12, 14.
Cups: One; once runner-up.
Peak UICA rank: N/A
Main Sponsor: Amber Wave Foods (food processing).
Manager: Steve Isaacson.
Colours: Columbia blue, navy blue, white.
Nickname(s): Islanders.
TBI Internationals: Defender Ósk Jakobsdóttir, defender Joey Baldwin.
Foreign Players: None.
Historic Players: Roger Doss, Gunther Bauer.
Last Season: 14th.
Prediction: 14th. Current management is unlikely to hold teenage sensation Joey Baldwin. But he grew up four blocks from the Islanders' stadium, and if he stays home there may be a future for this team.

FOUR TOWERS
City: Gernsback, Tesla (727,143).
Stadium: The Great Dome (61,522). Hosted the TakilQuip Champion's Cup 23 final and the World Cup 49 third place match.
Championships: Two: 23, 24.
Cups: One.
Peak UICA rank: 129.
Main Sponsor: Chronowire Communications (information).
Manager: Marty Dickinson.
Colours: Black, silver.
Nickname(s): Engineers, Watchmen.
TBI Internationals: Midfielder Taylor Chapman, defender Kaylee Nelson, striker Sydney Allan.
Foreign Players: None.
Historic Players: Carl DiFilippo, Bethany Martin, Nathan Taylor.
Last Season: 9th.
Prediction: 6th. No big stars here, but a couple of caps and a batch of role-players could sneak into the top five and the Globe Cup.

GREAT FALLS CYMRU
City: Great Falls, North Island (98,154).
Stadium: Maes Cymreig (26,722).
Championships: Two; 43, 44.
Cups: One.
Peak UICA rank: 76.
Main Sponsor: Heartland Financial (banking).
Manager: Isaac Buffington.
Colours: Red, green, white.
Nickname(s): Dragons, Cymru.
TBI Internationals: Centre back Saturnino Valle Barajas, defender Þór Finnsson, defender David Johnson.
Foreign Players: Forwards Rowan Finch, Urrsa A’Bearh, and Marra Crombeyand (all Bears Armed), attacking midfielder Ella Rasmussen (Baltskandio).
Historic Players: Not really enough history yet.
Last Season: 2nd.
Prediction: Champions. Rock-solid on both front and back lines, seasoned in international play. The team to beat.

FC GREEN STAR
City: Zamenhofa Urbo, South Island, a suburb of the capital Charleston (298,200).
Stadium: Kupolo Zamenhofa (48,115).
Championships: Two; 17, 18.
Cups: Two; twice runner-up.
Peak UICA rank: N/A
Main Sponsor: Senfinaj Mondoj Korp. (network technology).
Manager: Qiao Zhibang.
Colours: Kelly green, white.
Nickname(s): Dreamers.
TBI Internationals: Midfielder Matthew Bradford, defender Allison Parry.
Foreign Players: None.
Historic Players: Tony Martin, Qiao Zhibang.
Last Season: 11th.
Prediction: 12th. Anything higher is indeed dreaming.

GREENVILLE ROVERS
City: Greenville, North Island (18,590).
Stadium: Rovers Park (21,000).
Championships: Three; 28, 29, 49.
Cups: Three; four times runner-up.
Peak UICA rank: 114.
Main Sponsor: Fresh-Fizz (soda manufacturer).
Manager: Veronika Hennicke.
Colours: Forest green, tan.
Nickname(s): Rovers, Woodsmen.
TBI Internationals: Sweeper Ethan Powell, striker Bernd Kroymann, keeper Gregorio Solís.
Foreign Players: None.
Historic Players: Orson Cook, Veronika Hennicke, Averill Robinson.
Last Season: Champions.
Prediction: 2nd. Still a top-tier eleven.

OGC NANCY
City: Nancy, Verne (101,561).
Stadium: Sojourners Stadium (30,730).
Championships: Two; 35, 36.
Cups: Two; once runner-up.
Peak UICA rank: 95.
Main Sponsor: Tesla Motors (automobiles).
Manager: Jordan Matthews.
Colours: Scarlet, gold.
Nickname(s): Scarlet Army.
TBI Internationals: Defender Eva Glemnitz, winger Kaitlyn Clarke.
Foreign Players: None.
Historic Players: Ronald Dennis, Chloe Morris.
Last Season: 13th.
Prediction: 9th. Bringing Glemnitz back from Civil Citizenry should add needed veteran leadership.

PARISIAN
City: Paris, Verne (468,925).
Stadium: Parc de Triomphe (62,120).
Championships: Five; 3, 19, 20, 21, 46.
Cups: None; twice runner-up.
Main Sponsor: Security Group (insurance).
Peak UICA rank: 243.
Manager: Gaspard Garnier.
Colours: Brown, gold, white.
Nickname(s): Gendarmes.
TBI Internationals: Midfielder Ding Bangtao, striker Ingi Einarsson.
Foreign Players: None.
Historic Players: Phyllis Reeves, Pierre Rouleau.
Last Season: 12th.
Prediction: 11th. If they get their new stadium Paris will be a more attractive destination for the talent they need.

SOUTHLAND FC
City: Wye, South Island (1,012,871).
Stadium: Southland Park (53,712).
Championships: One; 7.
Cups: None.
Main Sponsor: ClearCola (soda manufacturer).
Peak UICA rank: N/A
Manager: Anselmo Velásquez.
Colours: Maroon, gold.
Nickname(s): Maroon.
TBI Internationals: Defender Théophile Chagnon, defender Gong Weishang.
Foreign Players: None.
Historic Players: Nobody remembers the guys who won it all over 40 years ago.
Last Season: 10th.
Prediction: 13th. Southland are determined to make the case that Wye Celtic should have had this slot.

UMFK
City: Kopavogur, Gibson (163,957).
Stadium: Duck Pond (27,373).
Championships: None.
Cups: One; once runner-up.
Peak UICA rank: 204.
Main Sponsor: Edda House (publisher).
Manager: Hákon Runólfsson.
Colours: Blood red, white.
Nickname(s): Vikings, Norse.
TBI Internationals: Defender Ava Gillespie, defender Ciriaco Jurado Gracia.
Foreign Players: None.
Historic Players: Maybe Kaitlyn Miller in a few years.
Last Season: 6th.
Prediction: 10th. The loss of Kaitlyn Miller to SC Lasft won't be overcome soon. But with money to spend this may be only a one-season dip.

VIKTORIA BADEN
City: Baden, Daimler (393,949).
Stadium: Badenstadion (50,007).
Championships: Three; 13, 15, 45.
Cups: One; once runner-up.
Peak UICA rank: 154.
Main Sponsor: Benz-Motorwagen (automobiles).
Manager: Alexander Baumann.
Colours: Black, old gold, cream.
Nickname(s): Ironmen.
TBI Internationals: Keeper Mathias Wiedergott, attacking midfielder Joachim Erhardt, wingback Chloe Packer.
Foreign Players: None.
Historic Players: Wilhelm Freudigmann, Lucy Barton.
Last Season: 8th.
Prediction: 5th. A team on the rise.

ZARAHEMLA ALL-SPORT
City: Zarahemla, South Island (50,109), a suburb of port city Three Rivers,
Stadium: Celestial Stadium (29,295).
Championships: Two; 40, 41.
Cups: Three; once runner-up.
Peak UICA rank: 94.
Main Sponsor: One Big Airline (transportation).
Manager: Alexis Power.
Colours: Purple, white.
Nickname(s): Royals, Stripling Warriors.
TBI Internationals: Attacking midfielder Claire van de Graaf, defensive midfielder Oddi Ísleifsson.
Foreign Players: Centre back Kiril Akhmetbekov (Kagdazka and Pazhujebu).
Historic Players: Maybe Aubrey Dew in a few years.
Last Season: 3rd.
Prediction: 8th. Hard to see much better with Van de Graaf coming off injury and Aubrey Dew overseas.

Season Table

** 50a Futbala Ĉampionado de Babaĝoj  Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Viktoria Baden                      26   15   5   6    53   38  +15    50
 2 Great Falls Cymru                   26   13   6   7    36   24  +12    45
 3 Dover City                          26   11   8   7    36   33   +3    41
 4 Belgium FC                          26   11   7   8    41   34   +7    40
 5 Greenville Rovers                   26   11   7   8    32   26   +6    40
 6 Southland FC                        26    9  10   7    27   28   −1    37
 7 Zarahemla All-Sport                 26    9  10   7    27   28   −1    37
 8 Bloomfield National                 26    8   9   9    27   33   −6    33
 9 Parisian                            26    8   8  10    32   34   −2    32
10 Far Point Islanders                 26    8   7  11    30   31   −1    31
11 FC Green Star                       26    9   4  13    31   34   −3    31
12 OGC Nancy                           26    8   7  11    26   33   −7    31
13 UMFK                                26    6   6  14    30   42  −12    24
14 Four Towers                         26    5   8  13    36   46  −10    23

UICA Entries

Champions' Cup 38: Viktoria Baden, Great Falls Cymru.

Globe Cup: Dover City, Belgium FC, Greenville Rovers.

As we no longer scorinate divisions below the first, we no longer nominate clubs to the Series B Champions' Cup.

by **Falconear** » Sat Mar 10, 2012 2:20 am

As shown by This thread, Falconear sends these teams:
Qualify for TQCC: CPD Dinas Parheft
Qualify for GC: De Ioke, CPD Dinas Larai, Rhymney Unideg
Qualify for SBCC: Gilfach, Kings Castell-nedd, Parahai, Rhyfelwr Baraft
Qualify for Cygnus Cup: Dinas Jukain Unedig

by **Astograth** » Sat Mar 10, 2012 9:24 pm

The Astograthian Football League: Season 645 Preview
Sponsored by

Astograthian football returns for its twelfth season, and things have never looked this exciting! Star signings, clever formations and shock results await, so let's take a look at what the off-season produced...

Transfers
- Simon Jonas (Osarius), from Sporting Iturributa, retired
- Svennis Moller (Polar Islandstates), from Astograth University, retired
- Alexei Razov (Mytannion) from Urbizania Wanderers to Sporting Iturributa
- Marcel Sanderskye (Polar Islandstates) from South Factory to Athletic Club Rumiatzi
- Fabián Taggliafico (Seleucius) signed as a free agent by Urbizania Wanderers

This off-season was unusually quiet, but in and out-going transfers were probably affected by the rumblings within the Astograthian economy this past year. Things look to be improving, but the spending sprees of years past, with the likes Timo Skye arriving to these shores, seem to have exhausted the funds of many clubs.

First Division

Echegoyan FC
Hometown: Echegoyan
Ground: Ximun Orieta Sporting Ground (34,000)
Colours: White and green striped shirt, green shorts and socks
Honours: 1 League (644)
Manager: Gunutz Yaregi
Lineup: Echepare Larrea; Soter Borunda, Hori Zufiria (C), Abdoulaye Bocandé, Oihan Sarria; Ilixo Akutain, Iosif Tarapkin, Iban Bachiondo, Anixi Eturaspe; Salum Merec, Kolya Tchailharovic
Season 644: Champions
Notes: Echegoyan is riding high on the top of Astograthian football at the moment, but their confidence has taken a blow after their defeats in the Royal Cup final and the Ides of March Cup against Jan Mayen Islanders. Though they're still strong, Tchailharovic is one injury away from retirement, and if he goes so does most of the team'sscoring ability.
Prediction: 2nd

Sporting Iturributa
Hometown: Iturributa
Ground: Old City Stadium (72,000)
Colours: Dark red kit with gold chevron, dark red shorts and socks
Honours: 1 League (640); 2 Royal Cups (638, 642)
Manager: Egoi Azarola
Lineup: Irungarai Aztore; Andolin Ankia, Ixona Ertze, Sotil Burruchaga, Eneko Dorregaray; Artur Rochemback, Garin Alea, Eneko Dicharry (C), Alexei Razov; Victor Brexio, Iker Malik
Season 644: 2nd
Notes: Sporting reemerged as a title contender last season, kept in second place more by bad luck than anything else. Mytanar winger Alexei Razov joins the team in top form as well after many seasons at Urbizania Wanderers; with the least-beaten defense in the league and a hugely talented strike partnership up front, Chevronekinaka could finally go all the way.
Prediction: 1st

Iturributa United
Hometown: Iturributa
Ground: Old City Stadium (72,000)
Colours: White shirt with diagonal red stripe, red shorts, white socks
Honours: 2 Leagues (638, 639); 2 Royal Cups (635, 636); 2 Ides of March Cups
Manager: Mayorga Achaga
Lineup: Hérion Galonloth; Gerard Royce, Tartalo Maruri, Gilen Katarain, Luk Merbilha; Norman Carter, Petter Bielsen (C), Lorenzo Gianluigi, Otz Lasuen; Itzaina Erreka, Ellis Elmsvikur
Shirt Sponsor: MariCorp (Erathi recreational drugs)
Season 644: 3rd
Notes: On paper, Iturributa United's team is simply fantastic. Outstanding keeper, arguably the best forwards in the league up front and a top midfield captained by a World Cup veteran. But the defense was in shambles last season, and Achaga has failed to adequately renew it. Merbilha hasn't adapted well and Maruri is inconsistent, while Katarain is fairly untested in top tier football. A gamble fore sure, and I don't think it'll pay off.
Prediction: 5th

Royal Rumiatzi
Hometown: Rumiatzi
Ground: Knights' Stadium (70,000)
Colours: White shirt, dark blue shorts and socks
Honours: 4 Leagues (634, 635, 637, 643); 2 Royal Cups (634, 644)
Manager: Garoa Larzondo
Lineup: Cheru Larretape (C); Urtzi Galard, Vladimir Beschastyn, Dion Jantot, Váradi Szemere; Kauldi Ayatsbehers, Ion Arreta, Bartosz Slusarski, Wilson Prieto; Vladimir Konovalov; Timo Skye
Shirt Sponsor: Torstebank (Blockhead bank)
Season 644: 4th
Notes: The arrival of world star Timo Skye was a revolution for Royal Rumiatzi, as all its game plans were thrown out to cater to the new striker. They put themselves together well enough towards the end of the season, epitomised in their Royal Cup final win over league champions Echegoyan, but they have to get it right from the start if the want to aim higher this season. If they do they can break their own record by grabbing a fifth title, or they can squander points and be going to the Globe Cup again...
Prediction: 3rd

Ituraitz FC
Hometown: Ituraitz
Ground: Ituraitz Sporting Ground (63,000)
Colours: All red kit
Honours: 3 Leagues (636, 641, 642); 3 Royal Cups (637, 640, 641); 1 Ides of March Cup (641)
Manager: Domeka Iriarte
Lineup: Astigar Barrueta; Atseden Echebarne, Milian Erburu (C), Maore Barturen, Dima Petersen; Soter Larreaga, Lester Sutton, Ikatz Alberro, Tartalo Achaga; Tomas Aer, Ikatz Ansotegi
Shirt Sponsor: ChocoMilk (Citiz dairy products)
Season 644: 5th
Notes: Ituraitz FC find themselves in a bit of a prolonged hangover after so much success a few seasons ago, but are coping better than others have in the past. Their squad is an interesting mix of youth and experience; Alberro, Achaga and Petersen are still at U21 national team level, Aer and Ansotegi have yet to hit their prime and defenders Barturen, Erburu and Echebarne are reaching the final stretches of their career. For the moment, they don't look likely to take the title, but the future lookos bright if they can secure decent replacements in the back.
Prediction: 4th

Urbizania Wanderers
Hometown: Urbizania
Ground: Cherketzo Arena (30,500)
Colours: All dark green kit
Honours: 1 Royal Cup (643)
Manager: Edorta Urrustoy
Lineup: Yoritz Suastegi; Odon Karrikart, Petrigai Mendiroz (C), Sotil Echeberry, Erlantz Izagirre; Wolfgang Sandberg, Eusko Lachondo, Gito Pizan, Yaizki Alaberri; Bayardo Urruzuno, Fabián Taggliafico
Shirt Sponsor: Farautoo (Polarian vehicle manufacture)
Season 644: 6th
Notes: Edorta Urrustoy, in his first job as manager, took charge at his boyhood club when it lay in eighth place and having lost its key players. He built from the ground up focusing instead on experience and the result was attractive play and a finish two spots higher. The squad is ageing however, and though the signing of Seleucius striker Fabián Taggliafico, who spent three seasons at Ituraitz FC several years ago, is a step in the right direction, Wanderers would do very well to qualify for an international competition.
Prediction: 6th

Astograth University
Hometown: Rumiatzi
Ground: Arritzola (11,000)
Colours: White and light blue halved shirt, light blue shorts and white socks
Honours: None
Manager: Xuban Barrutia
Lineup: Churio Muniya; Alatz Iturriza, Egor Helguson, Leheren Ubago, Unax Lauzirika; Diagur Lizarraga, Urdaspal Treto, Yoseba Eskoubes, Egerdi Bordato (C); Xabat Aristegi, Lartaun Echaspe
Season 644: 7th
Notes: Astograth University are still reeling from the cost of their failed bid to break into international competition, contenting themselves with miserable showings in the Valladar Torneo del Príncipe. Now they find themselves with a strong defense, marshalled by Polarian veteran Egor Helguson, but a lack of finishing and composure in the front that no amount of clever crosses from an Egerdi Bordato who has seen better days can mend.
Prediction: 9th

Athletic Club Rumiatzi
Hometown: Rumiatzi
Ground: Gotorlekua (42,000)
Colours: Blue and white striped shirt, blue shorts and socks
Honours: None
Manager: Alar Martikorena
Lineup: Lartaun Echegorri; Bikendi Medrano, Axular Arana, Ixona Unamunzaga (C), Kelmen Dazarola; Eneko Maruri, Marcel Sanderskye, Elston Piran-Osrick; Munio Baranzano, Berasko Arechaga, Gaur Arambilet
Season 644: 8th
Notes: Not having to stare relegation in the face is the cause of much celebration in the Athletic-supporting quarter of Rumiatzi. This is largely in part to the efforst of manager Martikorena, whose shrewd transfer policy has netted them a number of bargain buys. Piran-Osrick, Baranzano, Arechaga and Arambilet were all discarded by larger clubs for being washed-up, but they've found a second wind at Athletic and responded with quality football. To that list one must now add Marcel Sanderskye, relatively young and South Factory's standout player despite their relegation last season; the Polarian is sure to stir things up in a midfield lacking creativity.
Prediction: 7th

The Army Club
Hometown: Rumiatzi
Ground: 18th March Stadium (21,000)
Colours: Dark red shirt, blue shorts and dark red socks
Honours: None
Manager: Arnaitz Basagoitia
Lineup: Balesio Lanziego (C); Oroitz Garza, Petri Urdanibia, Kaxen Ondoro, Adon Echazarreta; Galeano, Eriz Larannaga, Zilar Sarasua; Orzaize Lizaran, Sendoa Irigiben, Yokin Achabal
Season 644: 9th
Notes: The Army Club survive largely to the colaborative efforts of their strikers and the solitary brilliance of Galeano, as Basagoitia's risky offensive tactics often harm the team more than help in my opinion. None of the players is, at this point, a match-decider by himself, and it is only with a strong sense of teamwork that the club stays afloat...
Prediction: 8th

Garitzeta Racing Club
Hometown: Garitzeta
Ground: Letatzadur Stadium (16,300)
Colours: Black and orange striped shirt, black shorts and socks
Honours: None
Manager: Egun Arbizu
Lineup: Artzeiz Treto; Lekuberi Erioste, Alaon Iturrioz, Anakoz Arbizu, Eneto Soreasu; Bladi Ytuarte (C), Osoitz Artechebarria, Urrai Gangoiti, Otsoko Egues; Berdaitz Ernaut, Meabe Bastida
Season 644: 10th
Notes: Garitzeta did well to finish tenth last season, but they have a difficult year ahead of them as they try to cling to the top tier once again. The team's star is striker Meabe Bastida, who is now charged with carrying the club on his back despite having played for a long time at bitter rivals Iturributa Racing Club.
Prediction: 12th

Blue Mountain Range
Hometown: Echegoyan
Ground: Ximun Orieta Sporting Ground (34,000)
Colours: All light blue kit
Honours: None
Manager: Bizi Boutayre
Lineup: Dei Zambrana; Efraín Vizcaíno, Erramu Labarde, Mogel Anies, Tipi Arregi; Aintza Goyenola (C); Berasko Esparkia, Herauso Uriel, Aberri Elizalde, Iruinea Paei; Intza Basurto
Season 644: 11th
Notes: Blue Mountain Range are a team of great tradition and pride despite not having added a trophy to their silverware cabinet since the era of regional leagues. Regardless, it wounds them deeply when they don't have the best defense in the league, which is why they will be tightening things around the goal even more this season. They have the talent to do that much, but up front? Intza Basurto is a decent enough striker, but probably doesn't have the quality to single-handedly take BMR very far.
Prediction: 10th

Athletic Club Olarria
Hometown: Olarria
Ground: North Point Stadium (12,100)
Colours: Claret shirt with sky blue hoop, claret shorts and socks
Honours: None
Manager: Eate Orkiola
Lineup: Benat Eraso; Asier Irazu, Yulen Garikano, Dei Letemendia, Domeka Elaustigeta; Zilar Garabiya, Ageyo Uzkudun, Leizarraga Lukuix, Yoseba Mestraita; Xanti Olasagastia (C), Loren Dornaletze
Season 644: 12th
Notes: Athletic Club Olarria have a remarkably balanced squad, and striker Loren Dornaletze in particular has tempted many larger clubs, but the pressure of the second season in the top tier looks likely to take its toll. A lack of major signings means they'll probably be watching next year's First Division on TV only.
Prediction: 15th

Iturributa Racing Club
Hometown: Iturributa
Ground: The Hippodrome (16,000)
Colours: Orange shirt with black stripe, orange shorts and socks
Honours: None
Manager: Loitzun Orrigarai
Lineup: Urtzin Sagasti; Axixi Larriategi, Leheren Arrexe, Kusko Ylincheta, Artizar Medrano; Balesio Lasa, Froila Zabala, Hustaz Amas, Mendebal Zaldibia; Argi Lezertua, Kauldi Isasmendi (C)
Season 644: 13th
Notes: Racing's captain, Emaut Oidor, a veteran of Ituraitz FC's best times, has retired from football and brought about a tide of change within the modest Iturributan outfit. Youngster Ylincheta and capped right-back Medrano remain the team's top stars, while striker Kauldi Isasmendi, summoned to Copa Rushmori VIII, has been named skipper and looks determined to drag everyone forward with him.
Prediction: 11th

Oyardo FC
Hometown: Oyardo
Ground: Sahatsakbasoa (14,000)
Colours: Red and white striped shirt, black shorts and socks
Honours: None
Manager: Ichaso Chapitel
Lineup: Berart Ispura; Dunixi Dibar, Umea Orrunio, Maurin Doynehard, Adei Etulain; Oinaz Ubago (C), Oinatz Bustinse, Atze Alisa, Lope Guesamburu; Otsoa Topalda, Formerio Gorospe
Season 644: 1st in Second Division
Notes: Oyardo FC bounce right back to First Division with their signature local-based squad. The Anzar lake region is not noted for its footballing success, which makes this all the more remarkable; with only U21 national team left-back Dibar Dunixi standing out, they'll have to work hard to stay away from the drop.
Prediction: 13th

Lermendia FC
Hometown: Lermendia
Ground: Itzarrak Sporting Ground (14,450)
Colours: White shirt with green hoops, white shorts and socks
Honours: None
Manager: Arkaitz Goyenola
Lineup: Seber Arrizabalaga; Uhin Axeritogarai, Peyo Boneta, Echekopar Artechebarria, Izotz Ugaldea; Eguntzenti Urruzuno, Hodei Ezkiaga, Arotza Goikoechea, Gastea Urrestilla; Aitzol Lekunberri, Baiona Lizarraga (C)
Season 644: 2nd in Second Division
Notes: Lermendia make their triumphant return to the top tier after many years. Few players remain from that time, but those who do now have plenty of “winning experience”. A smart transfer policy has also secured their future with a number of young prospects to replace their ageing stars... but in the short term, to but it bluntly, they look doomed. The first-team regulars have an average age of about 30, and that just won't cut it against top squads.
Prediction: 16th

Gesterlake FC
Hometown: Gesterlake
Ground: Castle Hill (38,630)
Colours: Yellow shirt, dark blue shorts, yellow socks
Honours: None
Manager: Chachu Larreburo
Lineup: Anixi Osma; Hitz Oniederra, Artzeiz Barbarea, Burni Lekaroz, Baleren Agirrezabal; Erroman Mamblona, Edorta Irazogi, Tipi Lafarga, Dabi Lizuain; Tibalt Kereyasu, Iratze Errekaborde
Season 644: 3rd in Second Division
Notes: At long, long last, Gesterlake make it to the top tier. Despite being one of the most popular teams in the country, with downright fanatical support, they have generally failed quite spectacularly, even spending time in Second Division B, but now they've put themelves together with a strong and experimented squad that nonetheless doesn't look likely to scrape out of the relegation zone.
Prediction: 14th

by **Homelands our** » Sun Mar 11, 2012 10:14 am

Super league

Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Pts
napio lions	18	17	0	1	44	14	51
island of jersey	18	11	5	2	28	15	38
jersey north	18	10	5	3	29	18	35
ek888	18	9	3	6	34	26	30
harloop city	18	6	5	7	22	26	23
swift scorpions	18	5	4	9	19	30	19
east kilbride city	18	5	3	10	23	29	18
newland untied	18	4	5	9	20	29	17
choup brids	18	3	5	10	18	31	14
harloop untied	18	1	3	14	16	35	6

And so napio lions win the super league. Island of jersey, who came second were going for 3 in a row. Harloop untied are relegated to the HO league league next season. International tournament qualification is at the bottom of the post.

HO league

Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	Pts
napio	14	10	3	1	22	8	33
jersey	14	10	3	1	22	11	33
east kilbride	14	7	3	4	25	19	24
harloop south	14	5	3	6	22	23	18
newland	 14	5	3	6	19	19	18
swift	14	3	4	7	17	23	13
choup	14	2	3	9	17	27	9
harloop north	14	1	4	9	11	25	7

Napio win the HO league! Jersey pushed them all the way, in the end only goal difference separated the teams. Harloop north finish Bottom of the whole football league. Napio are promoted. International tournament qualification is at the bottom of the post.

Homelands Our FA cup

Round 1 - HO league teams enter

napio 2 - 1 jersey
east kilbride 3 - 1 swift
Harloop north 0 - 2 harloop south
choup 2 - 1 newland

Winners advance to round of 16, losers will play in Round of Redemption.

Round of Redemption - losers from round 1 play

jersey 2 - 0 swift
harloop north 1 - 3 newland

Winners advance to round of 16, losers are out

Round of 16 - Super league teams enter

jersey 2 - 0 newland
napio 0 - 0 harloop south 1 - 0 AET
east kilbride 1 - 0 choup
EK888 1-3 swift scorpions
Harloop untied 0 - 1 napio lions
choup birds 0-1 island of jersey
Harloop city 2 - 3 newland untied
Jersey north 1 - 1 east kilbride city 1 - 1 AET, 5 - 4 PSO

Winners advance to quarter finals, losers are out

Quarter finals

jersey 2 - 1 jersey north
napio 0 - 1 newland untied
east kilbride 1 - 0 swift scorpions
napio lions 2 - 1 island of jersey

Winners advance to semi finals, losers are out

Semi finals

jersey 1 - 1 napio lions 2 - 2 AET, 3 - 2 PSO
newland untied 1 - 0 east kilbride

Winners advance to final, losers advance to 3rd place playoff

3PPO @ Harloop National

east kilbride 2 - 3 napio lions

Winner finishes 3rd, loser finishes 4th

Final @ Harloop National

jersey 2 - 4 newland untied

Winner wins the FA cup, loser is the runner-up

1st newland untied
2nd jersey
3rd napio lions
4th east kilbride

International tournament qualification
TQCC: napio lions
Globe cup: island of jersey, jersey north, EK888
SBCC: napio, jersey, east kilbride, harloop south
Copa de Campeones: napio lions, island of jersey
CdlP: jersey north, EK888
Cygnus Cup: newland untied

stadium bids

TQCC: Harloop National, seats 150,00O, the Harloop National is the perfect place to hold a Champion's cup final as not only does it have sate of the art facilities in the stadium it is right in the centre of the vibrant city of harloop. We will start off with the fans experience during the match, on the back of every seat in the stadium there is a board. This board has a let's the fans buy food, drink, team kits, team hats etc with just a few taps of there finger and without leaving they'er seat. This is catered for by a team of over 500 a match. This is in operation during the match and 30 minutes before and after it. The stadium has two big TV at each end of the pitch providing the teams and the score for those who are sometimes a bit forgetful. There is no running track here to bring the fans even closer to the action. Now on to what we have for the teams. The dugouts are massive 20meters by 10meters and each player and coaching staff gets a seat with two arm rests and that is undercover (like the rest of the stadium). The dressing rooms are of equal size and have 30 shower heads and 15 bath tubs each. They also have places for up to 30 players a TV and a 50meter by 30meter medical room. The two teams have different press conference rooms too and we have a car park with room for 200 cars 75 with be reserved for teams and UICA. Of the 7,500 hotel rooms in the city 3,000 will be reserved for teams and UICA. Nearly everyone in this city is a football fan supporting one of the city's four clubs. Those clubs are: harloop city, harloop untied, harloop north and harloop south.

by **PopularFreedom** » Mon Mar 12, 2012 10:51 am

2018 season – Loyalty Bay Informer

CHANGING OF THE GUARD
OceanHeights upsets Livelula to win Ratio Grand Championship!

Loyalty Bay, PopularFreedom – OceanHeights has done the unthinkable and upset the HSU champions 2-1 at home at Archer Fortress to win the Ratio Grand Championship. Led by forward Bill Black, the Waves were able to take an early lead and then hang on for the victory. Livelula gave it a good effort and a late goal by Donato Gallardon set the teams up for a rush of a final few minutes however Roger Lucerich proved why he is the starter for his team with some late game heroics to shut Livelula down and send all of OceanHeights into spontaneous revelry when the final whistle was sounded.

Livelula did not look in championship form and it showed as OceanHeights was able to burn them twice on corners in the first half, both times Black scoring the goals to stun the Livelula fans who had made the trek to Loyalty Bay for the match.

The win now sets up a Grand Championship in Thompson with fans of the Waves already predicting victory after the Ratio Grand Championship.

Meanwhile in other playoff news the match in Loyalty Bay was not the only one where an underdog won. In Stornoway City, Downtown were beaten 1-0 by the Miprate Fire Falcons to win their first championship ever, while in Bella Ella it was Villa Lesy knocking out another favourite to set up an unlikely Ratio tier 2 final.

In fact the only match today to go to the favoured team was in Peace where the Vikings defeated Vicanga in extra time to send the Pirates home and the southern part of Peace into celebrations. With all the upsets today of course it will be interesting to see who takes the titles in each of the tiers at the end of the post season.

Tier 1 Results:
BFL
PLS
FP

by **Kagdazka and Pazhujebu** » Tue Mar 13, 2012 11:35 pm

Guess what, everybody! I'm radically changing the way I do season previews!

I have found on recent occasions that actually writing up the season preview takes far, far longer than any other element of a season... longer than transfers, longer than new-player-generation, longer than scorination, longer than RPing... everything. And it's all rather pointless, really.

I like to regularly post something so that nations can see where their players are, and who they're teamed up with. But I think there's an easier way to do this than the way I have been.

Which is why, in lieu of an IC preview post, I am going to provide any and all who are interested the source file that I use to keep track of players, both foreign internationals in the First Division and the diaspora of K&P players worldwide. Thanks to Google Documents, you may now read away!

Pre-5254 Season Player Database

There it is. It's fairly easy to read, especially if you know how to use the "filter" option (it's a little funnel-shaped toggle on the right side of the top row) to sort the various columns and view the database in different ways.

Note that many (most) teams do not have the full battery of eleven players. (Anyone who has been REALLY diligent will has probably already noticed that I have always listed "Notable Players" rather than "All Players" or "Starting Eleven" for any given team, because most don't have all eleven.) That is because I have always been too lazy and/or strapped for time to create full complements for every side... I only complete the absolute best teams in the First Division, and right now that's FKM, Gimnasia, Vulkan, and Zhevassi. Assume that less-skilled K&P players fill out the rosters of teams.

Also note that some players are marked with a "Y" in the "Retired?" column. These players have retired before the season I am about to scorinate (in this case, 5254). They will not take the pitch. They are retired. Not, like, about to retire. Retired. They will be removed from the database the next time a season preview update rolls around.

Also note that I have two separate sheets (you can toggle between them with the tabs at the very bottom), labeled "Domestic-Based Players" and "Foreign-Based Players." Unless you're really curious, you probably won't need to look up where players like Fušia Oujadda or Ryurik Mizirov are based... that information is important for me, though. (Don't touch the "Current Year" tab, that affects the "Age Now" column(s) and only I should be updating it.)

Long story short, this is essentially the file that I use the absolute most in my NS Sports career, and now it's available for all to see. There will be an added positive in this: if I f#%k anything up with one of your players, and I'm sure I have before, now you can go straight to the file I use for everything, and edit it yourself.

Plus this will all but eliminate the odds that I will pull a Zarbli and accidentally delete everything.

In case anybody is cranky that I, it could be argued, will be doing less RPing as a result of this change, I have three things to say. One, I will still be RPing the actual season scorination. In fact, I hope to significantly improve the quality of said RP, since I'll have more time to work on it. Two, I'm going to be in the process of a move over the next few months, so it's going to be tough for me to stay super active if I have to waste my time digging through my records and then transcribing them into a post that everybody's just going to skim anyway. Three, I will still link the living crap out of the NSwiki articles I've worked my ass off on over the course of the last year and a half. In fact, I'll do it right now.

Everything's up to date, I promise. I just checked.

So, without further ado, let's all pull on our IC hats for the first trophy of the 5254 KPFA League season: the Purple Pearl Super Cup between the champion of the First Division (FKM) and the holder of the Šenapatiam'ajat Vahavi (Gimnasia)!

Venue: Purple Pearl Arena, Šah, Pazhujebu
Attendance: 24,000
Referee: Aipajawa Pana

Result
FKM 1-0 Gimnasia

CONGRATULATIONS TO FKM FOR WINNING THE 5254 PURPLE PEARL SUPER CUP!

by **Capivara Group** » Thu Mar 15, 2012 12:19 pm

(OOC: I've been busy with RL concerns and severely underestimated the time I would take in my attempt to make a full Daineri league in a simulation game)

Caspionato di Fuzibol Capivara Seu Creysson
Capivara Seu Creysson Football Championship

As a result of a match-fixing scandal, the championship had some places shuffled around for the new season. Fortunately, the champions weren't affected - Freiras de São Roque and Saci SC kept their titles.

In other news, soon the Capivara championship will open for international transfers! Stay tuned.

CERIÁ
A Series

Ceriá                         Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Chapeleta de Desportos         38   20   7  11    69   62   +7    67
 2 Saci SC                        38   17  10  11    88   79   +9    61
 3 31 Cudmundópolis               38   16  12  10    83   71  +12    60
 4 Filhos do Íbis                 38   15  14   9    52   43   +9    59
 5 Perebense                      38   14  14  10    48   42   +6    56
 6 Carandiru FC                   38   16   8  14    64   65   −1    56
 7 Inter Limão                    38   16   8  14    59   62   −3    56
 8 Vila Xurupita                  38   16   7  15    53   49   +4    55
 9 Paraguay SC                    38   15   8  15    77   68   +9    53
10 Coelhinhas FC                  38   13  13  12    64   68   −4    52
11 Madruguinha Buneco Clube       38   12  15  11    68   65   +3    51
12 Pisando na Bola FC             38   13  11  14    44   45   −1    50
13 Xangrilá                       38   12  13  13    49   61  −12    49
14 Real Jabuti                    38   13   9  16    65   66   −1    48
15 Vovó Clotilde                  38   10  16  12    50   45   +5    46
16 Morto Clube                    38   12   9  17    81   90   −9    45
17 Capivara FC                    38   12   7  19    54   59   −5    43
18 Freiras de São Roque           38   11  10  17    46   52   −6    43
19 Patético Balangandense         38   11  10  17    54   65  −11    43
20 Esperança Tetraplégica         38    9  13  16    73   84  −11    40

CERIBÊ
B Series

CeribÊ                        Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Benjamin Constant              38   19  12   7    42   26  +16    69
 2 Crash Bandicoot                38   16  13   9    64   55   +9    61
 3 Bunda Juniors                  38   16  12  10    74   71   +3    60
 4 Cebola Mol                     38   15  13  10    71   58  +13    58
 5 Real Saci                      38   14  15   9    70   62   +8    57
 6 Faustão PC                     38   15  10  13    59   50   +9    55
 7 Máfia FC                       38   14  13  11    77   72   +5    55
 8 Volta Quadrada                 38   14  13  11    37   38   −1    55
 9 Gruzeiro                       38   13  14  11    41   39   +2    53
10 São Ratazano                   38   14  10  14    53   55   −2    52
11 Pai Toletão de Oxalá           38   13  11  14    70   68   +2    50
12 São Perebano                   38   13  10  15    53   53    0    49
13 Las Marías                     38   13  10  15    49   51   −2    49
14 Calypso                        38   13   8  17    53   59   −6    47
15 W.O.F.C.                       38   11  13  14    38   41   −3    46
16 Pinel                          38   11  12  15    40   47   −7    45
17 Jibóia Preta 5000              38   11  10  17    42   53  −11    43
18 Bregantino                     38   13   4  21    36   57  −21    43
19 Nojentus                       38   10  11  17    71   78   −7    41
20 Atlético Clube dos Zumbi       38    9  12  17    43   50   −7    39

CERIÇÊ
Ç Series

Ceriçê                        Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Anões EC                       38   21   9   8    85   62  +23    72
 2 Galos do Jacu                  38   19   7  12    47   45   +2    64
 3 ET Discos                      38   18   8  12    65   58   +7    62
 4 GREC Unidos da Cerva           38   18   7  13    55   48   +7    61
 5 Queijolândia                   38   18   6  14    68   55  +13    60
 6 Primos do Macaco Tião          38   15  13  10    50   42   +8    58
 7 Viúvas do Pelé                 38   16   8  14    49   48   +1    56
 8 Atlético Cachaceiro            38   15  10  13    57   53   +4    55
 9 Toupeira FC                    38   14  12  12    70   63   +7    54
10 Acre                           38   14  12  12    75   69   +6    54
11 Cones da Prefeitura            38   15   9  14    89   86   +3    54
12 Atlético Estatuário            38   15   9  14    50   48   +2    54
13 Onze do Copo                   38   15   7  16    41   46   −5    52
14 Braçil                         38   13  11  14    73   75   −2    50
15 Barata FC                      38   13  10  15    53   55   −2    49
16 PBRBCCFA                       38   13  10  15    75   82   −7    49
17 SC Derrota                     38   11  13  14    75   67   +8    46
18 Mendigal Ispórtico Crúbio      38   11  11  16    73   77   −4    44
19 Peixe Frito                    38   10  13  15    51   58   −7    43
20 Tabajara FC                    38    1   5  32    26   90  −64     8

Parabeins au grandi campiãu
Congratulations to the great champion
CHAPELETA DE DESPORTOS

Champions' Cup
- Chapeleta de Desportos

Globe Cup
- Saci SC
- 31 Cudmundópolis
- Filhos do Íbis

SBCC
- Benjamin Constant
- Crash Bandicoot
- Bunda Juniors
- Cebola Mol

by **Earo** » Thu Mar 15, 2012 2:16 pm

Teams from the nations of Earo, Naitpyge, and the Holy Forden Church, have come together to form the Commonwealth League System.

Commonwealth Premier League

Commonwealth Premier League         Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Bishops-FOR                       33   27   3   3    70   18  +52    84   Champions
 2 CT Naitpyge-NAI                   33   26   5   2    75   22  +53    83
 3 Earo FC-EAR                       33   24   4   5    67   22  +45    76
 4 Heart of Earo-EAR                 33   11   7  15    35   45  −10    40
 5 Eao Athletic-EAR                  33   10   9  14    40   47   −7    39
 6 Earo United-EAR                   33   10   9  14    37   46   −9    39   Relegated
 7 St. Peter-FOR                     33    9  10  14    40   54  −14    37
 8 St. Paul-FOR                      33   10   6  17    38   51  −13    36
 9 Tempala-FOR                       33    8   7  18    35   52  −17    31   Relegated
10 Poquto-NAI                        33    7  10  16    33   52  −19    31
11 Legonian-NAI                      33    5  12  16    30   56  −26    27
12 Zota-NAI                          33    6   8  19    29   64  −35    26   Relegated

Earo, Naitpyge, and Forden Premier Leagues

Earo Premier League      Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts
 1 Harold Academical         36   16   9  11    60   46  +14    57  Champions, Promoted
 2 Kings O'del Norte         36   15   9  12    59   48  +11    54
 3 Deathsdon                 36   13  14   9    53   46   +7    53
 4 County SC                 36   14  10  12    51   49   +2    52
 5 Rovers FC                 36   14   8  14    54   61   −7    50
 6 Moeton                    36   13   9  14    49   52   −3    48
 7 O'Patrick                 36   13   7  16    55   56   −1    46
 8 Gungee                    36   12   9  15    48   49   −1    45
 9 O'Kirk                    36   10  14  12    41   50   −9    44
10 Earo River United         36   12   7  17    40   53  −13    43

   Naitpyge Premier League  Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Cowapobia                 36   20   6  10    60   49  +11    66   Champions, Promoted
 2 Smartiton                 36   15   8  13    50   46   +4    53
 3 Naitpyge City             36   13  12  11    46   42   +4    51
 4 South Life                36   15   6  15    51   52   −1    51
 5 Naitpyge Athletic         36   13  10  13    46   49   −3    49
 6 Naitpyge                  36   12  12  12    45   44   +1    48
 7 Lion Rovers               36   13   9  14    50   53   −3    48
 8 Naitpyge United           36   11  12  13    39   41   −2    45
 9 Albion                    36    9  13  14    45   48   −3    40
10 House of the Rising Sun   36   10  10  16    45   53   −8    40

   Forden Premier League    Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 East Forden               36   20   9   7    65   45  +20    69   Champions, Promoted
 2 Nuns                      36   16  12   8    60   41  +19    60
 3 Monks                     36   16   7  13    63   57   +6    55
 4 Tempala Athletic          36   15   9  12    48   40   +8    54
 5 Cardinals                 36   15   8  13    59   56   +3    53
 6 Forden Athletic           36   16   5  15    44   45   −1    53
 7 King's Park               36   11   9  16    52   66  −14    42
 8 Tempala City              36   11   7  18    45   56  −11    40
 9 Christian Rangers         36    7  15  14    44   53   −9    36
10 Missionaries              36    5  15  16    46   67  −21    30

by **West Zirconia** » Thu Mar 15, 2012 3:32 pm

Rather belatedly, the West Zirconian National League Playoffs:

Division One Playoff:

Semi-Final
Longshaw Town 2-2 Redwood Forest
Redwood Forest 1-1 Longshaw Town (1-2 AET)
Aggregate: Longshaw Town 4-3 Redwood Forest

St. Martin Athletic 5-0 Ashton Rovers
Ashton Rovers 2-0 St. Martin Athletic
Aggregate: St. Martin Athletic 5-2 Ashton Rovers

Final
Longshaw Town 2-1 St. Martin Athletic

Division Three Playoff:

Tîm Cymru 3-3 Heppenstall Town (4-3 AET)

by **Polar Islandstates** » Thu Mar 15, 2012 10:17 pm

With a "hoorah" for the return of Seu Creysson, the FPIFA would like to announce the international qualifiers from the Federation for this season, the events as they transpired for which can be found detailed in the following posts...
Season X: Preview - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3

INTERNATIONAL COMPETITIONS
CC: East Franz Athletic, SK Franz Josef City
Globe Cup: Jan Mayen Islanders, FC Cape St Paul, FC1. Surtsey Island Gulls
SBCC: FC Solovetsky Monastery, Severnaya Zemlya 88 Equinox, Melville Celtic, Atammik Zenith FK
Cygnus Cup: North Star Grímsey, FC Torshavn (as holders)

RUSHMORI COMPETITIONS
Copa de Campeones: East Franz Athletic, SK Franz Josef City
Copa de los Principes: Jan Mayen Islanders, FC Cape St Paul

SBCC STADIUM HOST BID

Palace Approach - 31,392 (Northbrook)
The home stadium of Northbrook Diamonds is a modest stadium, with much of the budget for added glitz and glamour taken up by the provision of heated seats - a welcome touch in this most hostile of climates. The outside is designed to let the winds whistle around and over the top of the stadium without much affect on the ongoings on the pitch, and the inside is designed so the noise reverberates around its walls. It is loud, it is atmospheric, it is an oasis against the frequent horrors of the weather outside. That said, the final should be in the summer, in which case it'll like be nice and clear. Either way, a strong crowd can be guaranteed from the curious locals even if many fans of the clubs involved stay away, and this sports mad town would love to host the final.

Merci beaucoup, details on sponsorships for the next five seasons to come when I have decided upon them.

by **West Zirconia** » Fri Mar 16, 2012 5:03 am

West Zirconian National League - Division One

The opening day of the WZNL season threw up a remarkable scoreline as Mort Park won 9-3 at East Snaith. Was this a taste of what to expect this season, or would things calm down just a little?

No team took a commanding lead as so often happens, with the usual suspects (except Markham, who stuttered on the starting line) swapping places at the top. By half-way, though, even Markham had recovered, with Stanley United having a slight advantage at the top.

To say East Snaith don't play well against Mort Park would be understating things, as the second half of the season kicked off with an 8-1 defeat at the STORMGroup Stadium. That victory seemed to help confidence in the Roadrunners, and their goalscoring spree continued, reaching 100 goals in just their 24th match (their fourth in the 5-0 win against Crompton, if anyone's taking notice).

However, it looked like Stanley United would hold on for the title, until the two met at the STORMGroup three from the end. Mort Park won 3-1, and the Viking's subsequent 0-0 draw with Etruria set up a thrilling finale.

Mort Park were at home to Etruria, whose display against the Vikings in the previous match had set up this scenario. Stanley, meanwhile, were at home to Hyland Town, themselves hoping not to be dragged into the relegation playoff. The Roadrunners' superior goal difference meant that Stanley had to better Mort Park's result to win the title.

The all-important results were:

Mort Park 2-0 Etruria
Stanley United 5-1 Hyland Town

giving the title to Mort Park. Those two matches against East Snaith ultimately helped in achieving that victory.

Meanwhile, after Longshaw Town's surprise promotion, most pundits believed that their Division One stay would be brief. They were right.

Code: Select all: Pos Team P W D L GF GA GD Pts 1 Mort Park 34 23 3 8 125 67 58 72 2 Stanley United 34 21 9 4 88 46 42 72 3 Banks 34 21 5 8 98 61 37 68 4 Bradley Hornets 34 17 8 9 86 58 28 59 5 Taylor's Cross 34 18 5 11 76 53 23 59 6 Houghton Kestrels 34 18 4 12 63 48 15 58 7 Markham 34 17 5 12 90 69 21 56 8 AFC Stanton 34 15 5 14 78 79 -1 50 9 East Snaith 34 13 6 15 82 99 -17 45 10 Civil Service 34 12 7 15 66 78 -12 43 11 Wacker Neustadt 34 12 6 16 67 79 -12 42 12 Currie 34 12 6 16 56 69 -13 42 13 Etruria 34 11 7 16 56 71 -15 40 14 Crompton Town 34 11 5 18 54 80 -26 38 15 Bradley Swifts 34 10 5 19 57 75 -18 35 16 Hyland Town 34 9 7 18 57 76 -19 34 17 Houghton Hawks 34 7 8 19 61 90 -29 29 18 Longshaw Town 34 6 5 23 61 123 -62 23

Division Two started in a similarly even fashion, and it was only by half-way that a clear leader - Redwood Forest - emerged. In the second half of the season, they gradually pulled away from the chasing pack, winning the title with a match to spare. After knocking on the Division One door for so long, Redwood are back.

At the other end of the table, founder Division One members St. Andrew's were relegated, along with Division Three founders Saint-Christophe and Kershaw Athletic.

Code: Select all: Pos Team P W D L GF GA GD Pts 1 Redwood Forest 34 21 8 5 66 41 25 71 2 St. Martin Athletic 34 18 9 7 73 57 16 63 3 New Toronto 34 17 6 11 85 67 18 57 4 Kirkham Town 34 17 5 12 81 67 14 56 5 Skelton Town 34 17 4 13 72 60 12 55 6 Tîm Cymru 34 16 6 12 79 72 7 54 7 Eastham Panthers 34 14 9 11 72 77 -5 51 8 Culshaw Town 34 14 8 12 64 56 8 50 9 Sephton County 34 14 5 15 55 63 -8 47 10 Moorcroft City 34 13 7 14 75 76 -1 46 11 Ashton Rovers 34 10 15 9 66 59 7 45 12 McLaughlin Islands 34 12 9 13 62 67 -5 45 13 Buckby Town 34 11 7 16 50 56 -6 40 14 Eardley Town 34 9 11 14 46 61 -15 38 15 Flockton Flavell 34 8 8 18 61 73 -12 32 16 St. Andrew's 34 7 11 16 42 56 -14 32 17 Saint-Christophe 34 7 11 16 65 82 -17 32 18 Kershaw Athletic 34 5 13 16 43 67 -24 28

In Division Three North, Moorcroft Wanderers ensured their promotion at the first attempt.

Code: Select all: Pos Team P W D L GF GA GD Pts 1 Moorcroft Wanderers 36 24 1 11 114 64 50 73 2 Knifton Town 36 20 8 8 97 71 26 68 3 Elwell Harriers 36 19 8 9 86 55 31 65 4 West Coast Angels 36 18 9 9 80 61 19 63 5 Sephton RMI 36 20 3 13 78 68 10 63 6 KVV Koehorst 36 18 8 10 73 69 4 62 7 Calland and Smallshaw 36 18 6 12 95 73 22 60 8 Kingsley Town 36 18 6 12 72 58 14 60 9 Kesterton 36 17 4 15 86 76 10 55 10 Halliwell Wanderers 36 15 8 13 85 82 3 53 11 Oglesby United 36 15 7 14 79 68 11 52 12 Rothwell Temperance Soc. 36 15 6 15 79 85 -6 51 13 Parkfield Rangers 36 14 6 16 65 65 0 48 14 Oakley 36 14 5 17 80 88 -8 47 15 Stanley Athletic 36 11 7 18 51 81 -30 40 16 FC Boston 36 9 7 20 57 79 -22 34 17 Mount Vernon 36 7 7 22 54 91 -37 28 18 Anderton Town 36 5 8 23 52 107 -55 23 19 Anderton United 36 6 4 26 59 101 -42 22

In an unusually one-sided Division Three South, Grimshaw Town lead from start to finish.

Code: Select all: Pos Team P W D L GF GA GD Pts 1 Grimshaw Town 32 19 7 6 76 41 35 64 2 Houghton Eagles 32 17 5 10 67 61 6 56 3 Newby Town 32 14 11 7 68 55 13 53 4 New Scilly 32 16 4 12 63 52 11 52 5 Underwood Town 32 15 7 10 62 55 7 52 6 Stanton Vale 32 15 6 11 49 46 3 51 7 St. Martin City 32 15 5 12 66 63 3 50 8 Hilton Athletic 32 15 4 13 78 69 9 49 9 Walton 32 12 9 11 68 63 5 45 10 Corpus Christi 32 12 7 13 57 58 -1 43 11 Somerville Thistle 32 11 9 12 57 59 -2 42 12 Shrigley Town 32 12 6 14 58 65 -7 42 13 Dutton United 32 11 8 13 52 53 -1 41 14 Ainsworth and Wells 32 12 4 16 60 79 -19 40 15 Heppenstall Town 32 10 7 15 53 56 -3 37 16 Wolverton Town 32 9 6 17 58 75 -17 33 17 Felton Athletic 32 3 3 26 41 83 -42 12

So Houghton Hawks and Longshaw Town are relegated from Division One, to be replaced by Redwood Forest and St. Martin Athletic. The playoff will be between Hyland Town, New Toronto, Skelton Town and Kirkham Town.

St. Andrew's. Saint-Christophe and Kershaw Athletic are relegated from Division Two, to be replaced by Moorcroft Wanderers, Grimshaw Town and the winner of the playoff between Knifton Town and Houghton Eagles.

Last.fm · by **Cosumar** » Fri Mar 16, 2012 5:04 am

FSF 992-993 Season

Harlighet Ligan
The Harlighet Ligan (The Glory League) is the highest tier of the FSF. Harlighet Ligan consists of 16 teams, with each one playing 30 games - two against each opponent. This season, Mallox took the League Title for the third time, while Cassandra City will advance to its first ever Globe Cup. CC's success was a huge surprise, having never finished in the top part of the table before. Former power Eastweald continued its downward spiral, missing the Globe Cup for third straight season.

Harlighet Ligan                     P    W   D   L   GF   GA   GD  Pts 
1 Mallox                             30   19   9   2   56   25  +31   66 TQCC
2 Cassandra City                     30   19   6   5   53   23  +30   63 GC
3 OAS Royal FC                       30   16   9   5   55   33  +22   57 GC
4 Kaldukosk FC                       30   16   8   6   61   37  +24   56 GC
5 Real Azuris                        30   15   6   9   59   43  +16   51
6 Ramusok United                     30   10  11   9   39   37   +2   41
7 Klyde                              30   11   7  12   47   35  +12   40
8 Morponte Fief                      30   12   4  14   34   46  −12   40
9 Eastweald                          30   10  10  10   41   34   +7   40
10 Olask Islanders                    30    8  10  12   36   45   −9   34
11 FC Samotath                        30    7  11  12   44   49   −5   32
12 Crawford FC                        30    8   6  16   36   51  −15   30
13 Vesriaville                        30    8   5  17   29   56  −27   29
14 Vloo                               30    6  10  14   39   52  −13   28
15 Zakhoro Aces                       30    8   4  18   34   62  −28   28 Relegated
16 Fort Archer                        30    6   6  18   26   61  −35   24 Relegated

Sekundar Ligan
Sekundar Ligan is the second tier of the FSF. Sekundar Ligan's season consists of 30 games, two games against each opponent. Caedar FC and Nomads earned their first ever promotions and SBCC berths, while seasoned Sekundar Ligan squads Pardock Island and FC Sven fell short of promotion once again, but will play in the SBCC. Former Harlighet Ligan club Serpents has been shockingly relegated. Preseason favorite West Gundar FC failed to live up to expectations.

Sekundar Ligan                      P    W   D   L   GF   GA   GD  Pts 
1 Caedar FC                          30   16   9   5   41   31  +10   57 SBCC/Promoted
2 Nomads                             30   16   4  10   40   36   +4   52 SBCC/Promoted
3 Pardock Island                     30   14   6  10   44   40   +4   48 SBCC
4 FC Sven                            30   14   5  11   34   33   +1   47 SBCC
5 Dusk Athletic                      30   13   7  10   32   33   −1   46
6 West Gundar FC                     30   10  13   7   45   36   +9   43
7 FC Cirdaw                          30   11  10   9   38   29   +9   43
8 Samaj FC                           30   11   7  12   29   32   −3   40
9 Centus FC                          30   10  10  10   33   34   −1   40
10 Helfin Fief FC                     30    9  11  10   36   38   −2   38
11 Klyde Heritage                     30   11   4  15   33   39   −6   37
12 Regela United                      30    9   8  13   38   35   +3   35
13 Pelethas United                    30    8  10  12   34   42   −8   34
14 Stoneshore United                  30    6  14  10   29   36   −7   32
15 Serpents                           30    7  11  12   34   40   −6   32 Relegated
16 Fevelo United                      30    5  11  14   29   35   −6   26 Relegated

Tredje Ligan
Tredje Ligan is the third tier of the FSF. Tredje Ligan consists of 16 teams, with each playing 30 games - two against each opponent. This was a crazy season. Predicted to finish near the top of the table, hyped Autumn FC fell flat on its face, as did last season's 3rd place finisher FC Hampton. Goldstaff City will return to Sekundar Ligan after its one-year absence. As always, Treftadaeth has its fans exasperated after narrowly missing a promotion for the sixth straight season.

Tredje Ligan                        P    W   D   L   GF   GA   GD  Pts 
1 Goldstaff City                     30   16   5   9   50   33  +17   53 Promoted
2 FC Na'Roshan                       30   14  11   5   40   24  +16   53 Promoted
3 Treftadaeth                        30   14   9   7   46   34  +12   51
4 Keenan Athletic                    30   14   6  10   36   23  +13   48
5 Crusaders                          30   14   6  10   38   36   +2   48
6 Oppnator Athletic                  30   11  11   8   37   26  +11   44
7 Pristine                           30   10  10  10   37   37    0   40
8 Huele United                       30   10   9  11   36   40   −4   39
9 FC Hampton                         30   10   9  11   33   35   −2   39
10 Yambridge FC                       30    9  10  11   32   35   −3   37
11 Ziemelu Skaida                     30   10   6  14   35   43   −8   36
12 Kromp FC                           30    9   8  13   30   36   −6   35
13 Gwynt Tyeil                        30    8   9  13   33   44  −11   33
14 Varvonti United                    30    8   9  13   34   45  −11   33
15 Sarmon United                      30    7  11  12   26   40  −14   32 Relegated
16 Autumn FC                          30    7   9  14   29   41  −12   30 Relegated

Qualified for International Competitions

TakilQuip Champions' Cup: Mallox
Globe Cup: Cassandra City, OAS Royal FC, Kaldukosk FC
Series B Champions' Cup: Caedar FC, Nomads, Pardock Island, FC Sven

Stadium Bids

TQCC: Leviathan Arena, Kaldukosk, Cosumar (99,114)
GC: Sampson Field, Ramusok, Cosumar (72,500)
SBCC: The Klyde Sportsplex, Klyde, Cosumar (83,930)

by **Kagdazka and Pazhujebu** » Fri Mar 16, 2012 10:04 am

Ah, the life of a teenage reserve player.

Barely sure that his toes were still attached to his body, and leaving as considerable the possibility that they were black from frostbite like the horrible pictures he'd been shown in high school biology class not too long ago, Vasiliy Baturin sat on the bench shivering. He wrapped the wool blanket he'd been provided tighter around his shoulders, and hoped to whatever deities he could think of that his boots had enough insulation power to stay the bitter cold of this February Dyurtyuli night.

He'd worked hard for the last three years, there was no doubt about that. A native of Gelendzhik, the much milder second city of Kagdazka down in the southwest, he'd supported Gimnasia his whole life and had slowly and painstakingly worked his way up through the rungs of the academy until now, where he was a reserve for the Gypsies in their second round KDZ Cup tie.

It was still early doors, but this was the competition that would select the four Kagdaz teams that, by season's end, would be fighting with four Pazhujebi sides for the Šenapatiam'ajat Vahavi cup trophy, a trophy that had had Gimnasia's name carved on it last year. If they wanted to pull it off again, someone would have to break this one-all deadlock as they and their opponents (the home side, Angels) rapidly approached the one hundred and twenty minute mark which, if arrived at with the sides still level-pegging, would cause the dreaded penalty shootout.

Baturin glanced up at Zivan Zagorinski, the manager of this prestigious club. He was both alarmed and elated at what he saw next... Zagorinski was pointing right at him.

"Warm up, fifteen!" shouted the boss, using his normal habit of referring to his players with numbers rather than names.

On the bright side, thought Baturin as he tossed off the blanket, maybe this will unfreeze my toes. On the down side, thought Baturin as he began to stretch out his borderline-unresponsive muscles, this is my first appearance for the club.

The eighteen year old couldn't tell if he was shivering because of the frigid air that was descending from the open roof of the aptly-named Ice Cube stadium, or because of nerves. Probably both, he decided as he began to jog up and down the sideline. No matter what way he looked at it, this was mortifying; especially since he knew precisely why he was being subbed in... penalties.

It was always said about Baturin that he was a brilliant striker of the dead ball, but that didn't necessarily mean that he believed in himself. The concept of coming on just so that he could participate in a shootout... well, it was nothing short of a nightmare for the teenage lad.

He watched as Zagorinski handed a slip of paper to the fourth official and returned to the dugout, seemingly unaware of Baturin and his nervous-looking warmup. The fourth official raised the digital board... and a red eight appeared next to a green fifteen. Lazhthuthezha Jujazhedhi was to be pulled, and Baturin was officially entering the match.

After having tapped Jujazhedhi's hands, the rest was a blur. Baturin's introduction was theoretically in the name of adding another attacking threat, but the young striker felt so nervous that his aging teammate Goren Barrenechea would be unable to hold down the fort in the middle of the pitch that he kept dropping back and severing the line to the forwards.

In the end, Baturin's attacking timidity brought about what he feared the most... penalties.

Standing in a line with his teammates, he reacted with horror when he saw his name listed fifth in the order for Gimnasia. He found himself simply hoping that the Gypsies' other player would win the shootout before it came to him.

Chalia Sajid was the first taker. She drained it, opting for power over placement.

Zhivi'ejethi Zhu followed for Angels. Class; top right corner. Arellano had no chance.

Now Lyonya Filipov. He'd had his struggles in the past twelve months. But he was quality from the spot.

Needing a goal to make it two-all, Angels sent Hridayaja Durai, who'd returned to the club on loan after two terrible years with Zhevassi, forward. He was good from twelve yards.

And then things starting going pear-shaped.

Up next was Barrenechea. A creaky old player he was, and his shot lacked the power to beat the Angels keeper. It was still 2-2.

Now they needed Arellano to come through. The Kalumban Chris Abouto was up next, and he cheekily slid the ball low and to the left, beating the GImnasia keeper.

Next, Ole Berghaus. The Polarian winger had been perhaps the best player in the First Division last season, and with a deft last-millisecond juke to the left, he proved it. His side-footed shot dipped into the bottom right corner to bring it back to threes.

But Arellano still couldn't buy a save. Yuri Zharov bashed a ball right down the middle, but the World Cup-winning keeper had committed himself to the left already.

It was four-three, and Baturin was up next. He had to score, or else his side would be out.

Barrenechea, the veteran who had missed earlier, patted him on the back as he nervously walked down from midfield to the penalty area.

Terrified, and shaking from head to toe, he stared forward at the experienced Angels goalkeeper Terrence Ottbourne. His memory drifted back to years ago, when he'd been just a boy. He recalled having watched the 43rd Baptism of Fire on television. Ottbourne had been a standout; perhaps the player of the tournament. It was hard to forget that regional final in Zhevassi between Southern Cynocephali and Kalumba... Ottbourne had been the player of the match by far and away, and probably the player of the tournament as well. He allowed just three goals over the entire course of the ten-match cup.

And now he'd have to beat that hardened veteran from twelve yards. If he didn't, his side would be out of the Vahavi.

All right, he thought to himself through a haze of fear and self-doubt, just pick a side. How about... left?

The referee blew his whistle.

Baturin began his approach, trying not to give away the side he'd picked.

Hit it hard, he remembered what coaches had always told him. Don't try to be too cute.

His shot wasn't cute, that's for sure.

It careened away from Ottbourne's fingers... and went wide of the post. Baturin had missed, and the holders were out.

The young lad collapsed to his knees on the frigid pitch. Now he knew why commentators always regurgitated that old adage: Who'd Want To Take Penalty?

by **Kagdazka and Pazhujebu** » Fri Mar 16, 2012 11:06 am

POLICE REPORT, MUNICIPAL TOWNSHIP OF ZHEVASSI
16 JULY, 5254

18:57 Officer Rhabur called to Beendhal Street to assist in domestic disturbance. Minor's pet ferret rescued from toilet and step-father arrested. Expected charge, animal cruelty.
19:05 Officers Masheepzad, Ouayaqh, Doumba, Tashcherin, and Jhaši called to Graha'ajat Stidiyama to assist national forces with security for First Division Matchday Seventeen Fajr Island Derby.
19:06 Officer Doumba relieved of duty. Hospitalization required. Cause: missile thrown at head.
19:06 Officer Tashcherin reports apprehension of three individuals related to case of assault on officer.
19:08 Officer Masheepzad confiscates illegal fireworks from crowd of youths wearing yellow, red, and blue scarves. After confiscation, youths allowed to enter stadium.
19:15 Officer Qavaha reports seeing suspicious activity at local donut shop.
19:18 Officer Ouayaqh oversees exit of Urajbina ZL and Zhevassi ZL players from tunnel and onto pitch. Stewards informed of situation.
19:20 Officer Qavaha reports that activity at donut shop is normal. Foods confiscated for "testing," however.
19:26 Officer Jhaši apprehends nineteen troublemakers in south stand of stadium. Expected charge, tresspassing; attempts to enter the pitch area are clearly defined as illegal in national code.
19:30 All units informed: match begins.
19:31 Officers Jhaši, Masheepzad, and Tashcherin report inability to communicate via radio due to impossibly loud chanting by home Zhevassi supporters. Officer Ouayaqh reports no communication difficulty.
19:35 All units informed: goal scored by Urajbina.
19:35 Officer Jhaši reports missiles thrown in south stand.
19:35 Officer Tashcherin reports missiles thrown in west end.
19:35 Officer Masheepzad reports missiles thrown in east stand.
19:35 Officer Ouayaqh heard shouting angrily over radio. Quoted as saying "not those motherf%#king c&#ts scoring again, god damn it ARGRAHAHA *indistinguishable* ARGRAGHAA F$%K!"
19:36 Officers Masheepzad and Tashcherin report lack of confidence in neutrality of fellow officer.
19:36 Officer Jhaši offers first-responder assistance to light-blue-clad spectator reporting signs of heart attack.
19:40 Officer Masheepzad reports continued cheering from away Urajbina supporters in north end.
19:53 Officer Rhabur called to Beendhal Street again to assist in domestic disturbance again. Minor's pet ferret rescued from toilet again and mother arrested this time. Expected charge, animal cruelty.
19:57 Officer Jhaši reports normal activity in stadium, supporter groups settling down.
20:00 Officer Masheepzad reports racist slurs shouted by Urajbina supporters in north end.
20:00 Officers Jhaši and Tashcherin report dangerously inflammatory tifo displayed by Zhevassi supporters in west end; depicts former Federation Premier Ghavujirjiam being speared through with sword.
20:05 Officers Masheepzad, Jhaši, and Tashcherin respond to requests for backup by stewards in northwest area of stands. Seventeen spectators arrested. Expected charge, public disorderliness.
20:05 Officer Ouayaqh reports necessary confiscation of alcohol beverage from spectator. No charges expected. Confiscated materials consumed by Ouayaqh on the scene.
20:07 Officer Masheepzad reports missiles thrown at players on pitch from east stand. Identity of perpetrators unconfirmed, no charges expected.
20:13 Officer Jhaši reports apprehension of two unclothed female spectators in south stand. Expected charge, public indecency.
20:13 Officer Ouayaqh reports seeing Officer Jhaši removing spectators on jumbotron.
20:13 Officer Jhaši reports being personally booed by thousands of fans.
20:15 All units informed: half time.
20:22 Officer Rhabur called to Beendhal Street again to assist in domestic disturbance again. Minor's pet ferret rescued from toilet again and sister arrested this time. Expected charge, animal cruelty.
20:23 Officer Rhabur reports questioning minor on why pet ferret is target of assaults by family members. Minor's response: "he just likes to crawl into people's mouths while they sleep; it's no big deal."
20:24 Officer Rhabur reports confiscation of dangerous and possibly rabid animal on Beendhal Street.
20:28 Officer Masheepzad responds to spectator complaint in east stand. Alleged infraction: "seat theft." Officer Masheepzad informs spectator that "quack-quack seat back" is not a legally binding contract.
20:30 All units informed: match restarts.
20:34 Officer Tashcherin reports players on pitch distracted by laser pointers being flashed at them from the stands.
20:36 Officer Masheepzad responds to complain and apprehends one spectator in possession of laser pointer. Spectator turns out to be Officer Ouayaqh. Expected charge, intent to harm with a dangerous object.
20:41 All units informed: goal scored by Urajbina.
20:41 Officer Jhaši reports missiles thrown in south stand.
20:41 Officer Tashcherin reports missiles thrown in west end.
20:41 Officer Masheepzad reports missiles thrown in east stand.
20:42 Officer Masheepzad radios in the following over radio: "IT'S UTTER F#&KING PANDEMONIUM! BACKUP! WE NEED BACKUP! ARGRAHAHA *indistinguishable* ARGRAGHAA!"
20:42 Officer Tashcherin reports unmanageable brawls between supporters in northwest, northeast, east, and southwest area of stand.
20:42 Officer Tashcherin's radio is apparently broken subsequently, no contact made with HQ for duration of evening.
20:43 Officer Jhaši relieved of duty. Hospitalization required. Cause: missile thrown at head.
20:43 All officers fail to contact HQ for duration of evening.

by **Socialist States Owen** » Fri Mar 16, 2012 5:38 pm

SSO UICA Qualifications:

Cygnus Cup: Sparta FC
Champions Cup: Directus
Globe Cup: Ulsa, Sparta FC, Revolutionaries
SBCC: Farrenton Athletic, Holdenberg, St Peters

Season 4 Conclusion

Gold League Standings

    Team                    P   W   D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Directus               38  19  11   8  50  31  +19  68   Champions + CC Qualification
  2 Ulsa                   38  20   8  10  60  42  +18  68   Globe Cup Qualification
  3 Sparta FC              38  19  10   9  50  32  +18  67   Globe Cup Qualification Cygnus Cup
  4 Revolutionaries        38  18  10  10  41  33   +8  64   Globe Cup Qualification
  5 New Harkdown           38  17  11  10  50  40  +10  62
  6 Bastion                38  18   7  13  52  37  +15  61
  7 Hornchurch             38  18   6  14  43  33  +10  60
  8 Workers Union          38  17   5  16  42  44   -2  56
  9 Holdenberg City        38  15   8  15  34  36   -2  53
 10 AFC Mayville           38  13  11  14  50  55   -5  50
 11 Sameba                 38  12  13  13  40  41   -1  49
 12 Dartmoor               38  11  14  13  37  40   -3  47
 13 Lajuno                 38  12  10  16  46  46   +0  46
 14 Culpapy United         38  12   9  17  38  46   -8  45
 15 Honeybadgers           38  11  12  15  38  47   -9  45
 16 West End Athletic      38  12   9  17  39  49  -10  45
 17 Ulsa Rovers            38  10  13  15  43  47   -4  43
 18 Marketville            38  10  13  15  29  45  -16  43   Relegated
 19 Dudsbury               38   8  13  17  36  51  -15  37   Relegated
 20 Stona United           38   5  13  20  28  51  -23  28   Relegated

Silver League Standings

    Team                     P   W   D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 Farrenton Athletic      38  19  10   9  53  38  +15  67   Promotion and SBCC Qualification
  2 Holdenberg              38  18  10  10  48  32  +16  64   Promotion and SBCC Qualification
  3 St Peters               38  18  10  10  49  34  +15  64   Promotion and SBCC Qualification
  4 Brigham                 38  16  13   9  43  33  +10  61
  5 Callodown Rovers        38  17   9  12  45  41   +4  60
  6 Whitepill               38  17   8  13  39  35   +4  59
  7 Swenselona              38  17   7  14  46  41   +5  58
  8 Usmer                   38  16   9  13  42  39   +3  57
  9 Falourr                 38  16   9  13  42  43   -1  57
 10 Thagarnia               38  14  12  12  54  40  +14  54
 11 Charleston              38  16   5  17  46  42   +4  53
 12 Mayville Town           38  14   8  16  39  44   -5  50
 13 Cockville               38  13   7  18  37  42   -5  46
 14 Real Oakwood            38  12  10  16  40  46   -6  46
 15 Bastion Lions           38  11  12  15  42  47   -5  45
 16 Arrowsmith              38  12   8  18  41  58  -17  44
 17 Heinden Athletic        38  11  10  17  31  35   -4  43
 18 Carsby                  38  11  10  17  38  53  -15  43    Relegated
 19 Nukon Atoms             38  11   9  18  45  51   -6  42    Relegated
 20 Dashturnbein            38   8  10  20  29  55  -26  34    Relegated

Bronze League Standings

    Team                     P   W   D   L For  Ag  +/- Pts
  1 EFS                     38  23  11   4  56  27  +29  80   Promotion
  2 Sword City              38  17  12   9  53  33  +20  63   Promotion
  3 Baines United           38  19   6  13  46  37   +9  63   Promotion
  4 Pashter United          38  17  10  11  52  45   +7  61
  5 Norton Rovers           38  16   9  13  55  41  +14  57
  6 Duley Town              38  14  12  12  41  39   +2  54
  7 Royals Athletic         38  14  11  13  52  48   +4  53
  8 Junoa                   38  14  11  13  45  45   +0  53
  9 Hammersbridge           38  12  17   9  45  45   +0  53
 10 Hodgson FC              38  14  10  14  24  26   -2  52
 11 Argyle                  38  12  13  13  43  41   +2  49
 12 Suttonville             38  12  13  13  36  35   +1  49
 13 Singleton               38  12  13  13  41  46   -5  49
 14 Bradbury Athletic       38  12  12  14  49  46   +3  48
 15 Starrod Town            38  12  12  14  46  49   -3  48
 16 Republicans AFC         38  11  12  15  39  50  -11  45
 17 St Johns                38  10  14  14  43  44   -1  44
 18 Euxton Villa            38   9   9  20  33  58  -25  36    Relegated
 19 Pebbles Island FC       38   8  10  20  28  49  -21  34    Relegated
 20 Waterloo                38   7  13  18  24  47  -23  34    Relegated

FSSO National Cup

This years champions: Sparta FC

Code: Select all: First Round Charleston 0-1 The Old Boys Club (0-1 agg) St Peters 3-1 Chetcooking (3-1 agg) Shawaddy 1-0 East Trinity (1-0 agg) Stona United 6-1 Wackersville United (6-1 agg) Barbero Waterlooville 2-5 Stigtopia (2-5 agg) Republicans AFC 1-1 Farenborn (2-1 AET, 2-1 agg) Clifton Villa 2-4 Foxhampton (2-4 agg) Jackson Borough 1-0 Dartmoor (1-0 agg) Trollbridge 2-1 EFS (2-1 agg) Junoa 2-0 Swenselona (2-0 agg) Abbey Green 2-0 Royals Athletic (2-0 agg) Nobberham Rovers 1-1 Whitepill (1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 2-3 PKs) Harleys Park 2-0 Semensample Athletic (2-0 agg) Usmer 1-0 Trustaloopa (1-0 agg) Bungkhok 0-1 Cockville (0-1 agg) Durden 1-1 Notten Wharf (1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 1-2 PKs) Holdenburg 3-0 Bignews (3-0 agg) Lajuno 1-1 Farrenton Athletic (1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 2-1 PKs) Argyle 1-1 Alpervale (1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 0-1 PKs) Hammersbridge 1-1 Norcross United (1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 1-3 PKs) Jumbuck 0-0 Singleton (1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 1-3 PKs) Actongold 2-4 Pashter United (2-4 agg) Callodown Rovers 2-0 Dudsbury (2-0 agg) Schleef 2-0 Sharkweek (2-0 agg) Bradbury Athletic 4-0 Alfton Town (4-0 agg) St Johns 2-0 West Trinity (2-0 agg) Directus 1-1 Highcross (2-1 AET, 2-1 agg) Workers Union 1-1 Curlel Rovers (1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 2-3 PKs) Bastion Lions 2-1 Christperch (2-1 agg) Heinden United 3-0 Cockfosters Town (3-0 agg) Chafey Wood 0-5 Nukon Atoms (0-5 agg) West End Athletic 3-0 Parkerstone AFC (3-0 agg) Honeybadgers 1-0 Pebbles Island FC (1-0 agg) Brigham 1-0 Mereside (1-0 agg) Moors 2-0 Bannanarama (2-0 agg) Cotewood Town 1-2 AFC Mayville (1-2 agg) New Harkdown 1-2 Carsby (1-2 agg) Katterby Town 1-2 Lamrington United (1-2 agg) Lungzon Rovers 1-0 Sword City (1-0 agg) Falleyforth 0-1 Hodgson FC (0-1 agg) Johnnynames 1-1 Baines United (1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 0-2 PKs) Oakstone 2-0 Mereside Twatters (2-0 agg) Rohan 2-2 Braddock (2-2 AET, 2-2 agg, 1-2 PKs) Ulsa 2-0 Mayville Town (2-0 agg) Waterloo 0-0 Taylorhill Town (0-0 AET, 0-0 agg, 4-1 PKs) Revolutionaries 1-0 Wewt (1-0 agg) Starrod Town 0-1 Hornchurch (0-1 agg) Walkers Industries FC 0-0 Croxford (0-0 AET, 0-0 agg, 3-1 PKs) Wackersville 1-6 Euxton Villa (1-6 agg) Norton Rovers 0-3 Ulsa Rovers (0-3 agg) Real Oakwood 4-1 Suttonville (4-1 agg) Karkland Athletic 1-2 Cuba Hola (1-2 agg) Puthill Rovers 0-2 Bastion (0-2 agg) Pinholt 0-4 Melton Heath (0-4 agg) Duley Town 2-0 Walsh Athletic (2-0 agg) Alfton Villa 0-3 Dashturnbein (0-3 agg) Badgerdon 0-1 Weatherfield (0-1 agg) Culpapy United 2-2 Arrowsmith (3-2 AET, 3-2 agg) Falourr 0-0 Thagarnia (0-0 AET, 0-0 agg, 4-3 PKs) Maid Cross 0-0 South Park (0-0 AET, 0-0 agg, 2-1 PKs) Sameba 1-0 Holdenburg City (1-0 agg) Sparta FC 2-0 James Brown Town (2-0 agg) Ciaolla 0-0 Oldgate Town (1-0 AET, 1-0 agg) Marketville 1-0 Chetcooking United (1-0 agg) Second Round Brigham 1-2 Directus (1-2 agg) Moors 3-0 Singleton (3-0 agg) Culpapy United 0-1 Stona United (0-1 agg) Heinden United 2-0 Hornchurch (2-0 agg) Whitepill 0-1 Stigtopia (0-1 agg) Melton Heath 1-4 Bastion Lions (1-4 agg) Abbey Green 0-2 St Peters (0-2 agg) Junoa 2-1 Ulsa (2-1 agg) St Johns 2-0 Usmer (2-0 agg) Cockville 1-1 Walkers Industries FC (1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 0-2 PKs) Curlel Rovers 0-0 Lungzon Rovers (0-0 AET, 0-0 agg, 4-5 PKs) Euxton Villa 0-1 Hodgson FC (0-1 agg) Ulsa Rovers 1-1 Honeybadgers (1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 2-0 PKs) Norcross United 1-3 Falourr (1-3 agg) Alpervale 0-2 Sameba (0-2 agg) Notten Wharf 1-0 Ciaolla (1-0 agg) Carsby 0-0 Callodown Rovers (0-0 AET, 0-0 agg, 2-3 PKs) Trollbridge 0-1 Baines United (0-1 agg) The Old Boys Club 3-1 Lamrington United (3-1 agg) Real Oakwood 1-2 Pashter United (1-2 agg) Marketville 0-3 Jackson Borough (0-3 agg) Nukon Atoms 0-1 Sparta FC (0-1 agg) AFC Mayville 3-2 Waterloo (3-2 agg) Oakstone 2-0 Republicans AFC (2-0 agg) Shawaddy 3-3 Dashturnbein (3-3 AET, 3-3 agg, 1-3 PKs) Braddock 1-0 Maid Cross (1-0 agg) Schleef 1-2 Revolutionaries (1-2 agg) Foxhampton 0-0 Lajuno (0-0 AET, 0-0 agg, 1-3 PKs) Weatherfield 0-1 West End Athletic (0-1 agg) Bastion 2-0 Harleys Park (2-0 agg) Bradbury Athletic 2-0 Cuba Hola (2-0 agg) Holdenburg 0-1 Duley Town (0-1 agg) Third Round St Peters 2-0 Oakstone (2-0 agg) West End Athletic 2-0 Jackson Borough (2-0 agg) Hodgson FC 0-1 The Old Boys Club (0-1 agg) Lungzon Rovers 1-2 Callodown Rovers (1-2 agg) AFC Mayville 3-0 Bastion Lions (3-0 agg) Notten Wharf 0-2 Falourr (0-2 agg) Moors 2-1 Braddock (2-1 agg) Pashter United 1-2 Sparta FC (1-2 agg) Dashturnbein 3-0 Ulsa Rovers (3-0 agg) Revolutionaries 1-1 Heinden United (1-2 AET, 1-2 agg) Stigtopia 0-2 Sameba (0-2 agg) Bastion 1-0 Bradbury Athletic (1-0 agg) St Johns 3-0 Walkers Industries FC (3-0 agg) Baines United 2-1 Junoa (2-1 agg) Stona United 1-1 Duley Town (1-2 AET, 1-2 agg) Lajuno 0-1 Directus (0-1 agg) Fourth Round Callodown Rovers 0-1 Sameba (0-1 agg) Falourr 2-1 Duley Town (2-1 agg) AFC Mayville 1-2 Sparta FC (1-2 agg) Bastion 2-2 Dashturnbein (2-2 AET, 2-2 agg, 4-3 PKs) Baines United 3-1 Heinden United (3-1 agg) The Old Boys Club 2-1 St Peters (2-1 agg) West End Athletic 0-0 Directus (0-1 AET, 0-1 agg) Moors 2-0 St Johns (2-0 agg) Quarter Finals Falourr 1-1 Sparta FC (1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 1-2 PKs) The Old Boys Club 0-0 Sameba (0-1 AET, 0-1 agg) Moors 3-4 Bastion (3-4 agg) Baines United 0-0 Directus (0-0 AET, 0-0 agg, 3-1 PKs) Semi Finals Sparta FC 1-0 Baines United (1-0 agg) Bastion 3-4 Sameba (3-4 agg) Final Sparta FC 2-0 Sameba (2-0 agg)

Season 4 Review

Gold League - Full List of Key Scorers

Code: Select all: Paul Fessner (Directus) - 25 Pola Grabnyak (Holdenberg City) - 23 Clevon Drago (Revolutionaries) - 21 Chad Parsons (AFC Mayville) - 21 Jonathan Steele (Ulsa) - 20 Marseto Silvia (Sparta FC) - 18 Jim Cotterill (Bastion) - 17 Guy Stamp (Honeybadgers) - 16 Sam Thomas (Sparta FC) - 16 Nicky Martin (Ulsa) - 16 Hamilton Robery (Sameba) - 15 Dave Bardson (Culpapy United) - 14 Rich Foley (Workers Union) - 14 Lewis Moore (New Harkdown) - 13 Clive Dawson (Marketville) - 13 Ender Wiggin (Dartmoor) - 13 Rob Spider (Stona United) - 12 Steven Thompson (Ulsa) - 12 Graham Hill (Hornchurch) - 12 Luke Bluewater (West End Athletic) - 12 Harvey Dexter (Ulsa Rovers) - 11 Other notable players (Below 10 goals): Stan Champion (Dudsbury) - 10 Geoff Day (Bastion) - 10 Conway Carlton (Lajuno) - 10 Recobo (Bastion) - 9 Jay Morrison (Ulsa Rovers) - 9 Kieron Kane (Revolutionaries) - 9 Ross Browning (New Harkdown) - 9 Seryou Kobe (Sparta FC) - 8 James McCroft (Directus) - 8 Sammy Knowles (Marketville) - 7 Carl Coffa (Hornchurch) - 7 Andy Wilk (Culpapy United) - 7 Nick Hammill (Workers Union) - 7 Carlos Aduna (Bastion) - 7 Mario Mikkenen (Lajuno) - 5 Nick Feeney (Hornchurch) - 5 Nicholas Kerr (Stona United) - 5 Jay Carter (Sameba) - 4 Eduardo Prost (Honeybadgers) - 4 Mikhael Johannes (Revolutionaries) - 4 Mikhael van Germ (Sparta FC) - 4 Ascot Sanders (Revolutionaries) - 3

FSSOFA Annual Awards

FSSO Football League Golden Boot

Paul Fessner (FSSO, Directus) - 25 goals
Pola Grabnyak (New Hackney, Holdenberg City) - 23
Clevon Drago (Civil Citizenry, Revolutionaries) - 21
Chad Parsons (FSSO, AFC Mayville) - 21
Jonathan Steele (Sameba, Ulsa) - 20

Goalkeeper of the Season

Daniel Belgrave (FSSO, Directus)
Antonio Marino (Erathore, Sparta FC)
Filip Samuel (Taeshan, Bastion)

Defender of the Season

Michael Robertson (FSSO, Directus)
Nick Hamill (FSSO, Workers Union)
Mickey Smith (FSSO, Culpapy United)

Midfielder of the Season

Jim Cotterill (FSSO, Bastion)
Steve Thompson (FSSO, Ulsa)
James McCroft (FSSO, Directus)

Forward of the Season

Pola Grabnyak (New Hackney, Holdenberg City)
Paul Fessner (FSSO, Directus)
Chad Parsons (FSSO, AFC Mayville)

International Player of the Season

Pola Grabnyak (New Hackney, Holdenberg City)
Antonio Marino (Erathore, Sparta FC)
Clevon Drago (Civil Citizenry, Revolutionaries)

Young Player of the Season

Pola Grabnyak (New Hackney, Holdenberg City)
Sam Thomas (FSSO, Sparta FC)
Nicky Martin(FSSO, Ulsa)

Player of the Season

Pola Grabnyak (New Hackney, Holdenberg City)
Paul Fessner (FSSO, Directus)
Daniel Belgrave (FSSO, Directus)

by **Ancharmunn** » Fri Mar 16, 2012 6:54 pm

Whilst previously unknown to the world, organised football competition in Ancharmunn has been ongoing for sixteen seasons. There are two main competitions in the country, the fourteen team National Soccer League and the All-Ancharmunn Challenge Cup which sees thirty-two teams competing on a knockout basis. Whilst a Junior League, split into two regional divisions, exists below the NSL it is essentially a glorified Sunday League and no movement between the NSL and Junior League occurs. Junior League members do however participate in the Challenge Cup.

During its existence Charmunnry football has been largely amateur, however the recent influx of Sorthern immigration to the country has bought a degree of professionalism to the sport. As a result of this Charmunnry football is has begun participating on a worldwide and regional scale by joining UICA and regional competitions. A season of this has already seen a significant increase in the level of the sport within the country.

Tyneala Championship
The 1090-91 season sees the introduction of the Tyneala Championship. A one off season opening game played between the league champions of Acharmunn and Aels, the two constituent nations of Tyneala. The hosting of the match will switch between the two countries annually, being held at the home ground of the host nation's champions. In what was a low scoring opener it was the Aelsh champions who took inaugural All-Tyneala bragging rights by scoring the only goal of the game.

Goidelic 0–1 Trechoid Wanderers

National Soccer League
For the first time in some nine years the league championship was wrestled away from the capital. Goidelic endured a poor campaign, by their standards, but did hold on for third and Globe Cup and Copa de los Principes qualification. Above them meanwhile was not much of a battle for the title as Ballymairead Town, runners-up last season, quite comfortably finished nine points ahead of Seersha County. No doubt benefiting from the divine oversight of 'Her', Ballymairead Town's league title is the first in their history.

.  National Soccer League  Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Ballymairead Town        26   15   6   5    49   31  +18    51 C TQCC CdC
 2 Seersha County           26   12   6   8    61   46  +15    42 GC CdlP
 3 Goidelic                 26   10   9   7    57   50   +7    39 GC CdlP
 4 Dinas Drefhil            26   11   5  10    56   51   +5    38 
 5 Rushmore Athletic        26   10   7   9    68   63   +5    37
 6 Clotariens               26    9  10   7    52   48   +4    37
 7 Downcurron Thistles      26   10   6  10    54   57   −3    36
 8 Ballymairead Dynamos     26   10   5  11    51   53   −2    35
 9 Atlético Cabañas         26    8  10   8    58   56   +2    34
10 Kumquat Orchard          26    9   7  10    46   47   −1    34
11 Caernankry City          26    6  11   9    56   63   −7    29 GC CdC
12 Sortherners              26    7   8  11    56   66  −10    29
13 Red Star                 26    7   8  11    43   56  −13    29
14 H.Ó.C.P.                 26    5   8  13    55   75  −20    23

All-Ancharmunn Challenge Cup

First round
Seersha County 2-0 Omna Park
Red Star 2-0 Sean Dermots
Old Town Wanderers 1-0 Ballymairead Aelsh
Maghery Park 2-0 High Castle Colts
Clotariens 4-3 Callow
Ballymairead Dynamos 1-2 Goidelic
Atlético Cabañas 5-1 General Post Office
Civil Service 0-2 H.Ó.C.P.
Gortass 1-2 Eskry Sports
Glanlaght 0-5 Sortherners
Torshavn Exiles 1-1 Loughskreena Casuals (1-1 AET, 1-0 PKs)
Young Kytlerians 0-2 Rushmore Athletic
Dinas Drefhil 3-1 Farrannash
Ballymairead Constabulary 3-2 Kumquat Orchard
Downcurron Thistles 3-0 Green Island Caernankry
Ballymairead Town 1-2 Caernankry City

Second round
Old Town Wanderers 1-4 H.Ó.C.P.
Sortherners 1-1 Downcurron Thistles (1-1 AET, 0-2 PKs)
Dinas Drefhil 1-1 Atlético Cabañas (1-2 AET)
Seersha County 0-0 Red Star (0-0 AET, 2-3 PKs)
Ballymairead Constabulary 2-1 Maghery Park
Eskry Sports 0-2 Rushmore Athletic
Torshavn Exiles 2-3 Clotariens
Caernankry City 2-0 Goidelic

Quarter-final
Clotariens 1-0 Rushmore Athletic
H.Ó.C.P. 1-0 Atlético Cabañas
Caernankry City 2-1 Downcurron Thistles
Red Star 1-0 Ballymairead Constabulary

Semi-final
Caernankry City 4-3 Clotariens
H.Ó.C.P. 3-1 Red Star

Final
Caernankry City 2-1 H.Ó.C.P.

Multi-associational competition qualifiers
Champions' Cup - Ballymairead Town
Globe Cup - Caernankry City [cup winners], Seersha County, Goidelic [note - Challenge Cup winners should take precedence over league performance for seeding]
Copa de Campeones - Ballymairead Town, Caernankry City [cup winners]
Copa de los Principes - Seersha County, Goidelic
Cygnus Cup - Caernankry City

by **Kagdazka and Pazhujebu** » Fri Mar 16, 2012 9:58 pm

I first met Adrik Kondrashov in 5241, when he was an ambitious young man who worked in some kind of manufacturing job. Cereal packaging, or somesuch. I honestly don't recall at this point. I'm sure he won't mind terribly if I misspeak. He was always a forgiving, bright-spirited one, grinning from ear to ear all the time.

We were introduced when I was sent by the Dyurtyuli Sun to report on unionization in the Federation's largest city. Though I at first wanted to approach the story coldly, remaining as neutral as possible, the time I spent with the man changed me. His lifestyle was one that many of us might consider Bohemian, I suppose... when he wasn't working at the plant or attending union meetings, he was moonlighting as a bassist in a grunge band called Soap Scum on Toast in Yeaddin.

I went to an SSoTiY show once when Adrik invited me. It wasn't quite my thing (there was a guy in the front row wearing plaid with a trumpet who kept trying to play along with the band, and nobody was sure if he had asked for permission or not... I couldn't help but wonder if it was some kind of Andy Kaufman-style performance art invisible theatre kind of thing). All the hipsters there loved it, though. Adrik was a real hit.

He's moved on now, though we've definitely stayed in touch. Adrik got a better job running a distribution office for school supplies or something. He's now the one who has to cross the picket line, not the one who has to hold it. And he's definitely not moonlighting in a grunge band anymore. Honestly, I've moved on too, though I've moved on in the opposite direction. Now disillusioned with the corporate world of commercial newspapering, I've moved on to freelance writing for public radio.

But he still goes to Yellowknife Yaks matches, and that's what I remember most about that first week I spent interviewing him.

He invited me about six hours before kickoff, which normally I would have objected to (I've never been much of a sports girl), but since I was trying to really dig in and explore the nuances of his lifestyle, I accepted the invitation.

"Don't wear anything nice," he told me, which at the time I thought nothing of, being a young, twenty-something reporter, but which now would be a concerning warning.

So I showed up in simply a sweatshirt and jeans, barely enough to stay warm in the mild Dyurtyuli summer air. He led me across town on the monorail, in severe need of renovation at the time (remember, these were the years of the military dictatorship when public funding was yanked out of infrastructure and poured into arms buildup), not like today in its pristine condition.

We got off at the Zapadnaya Dyurtyuli Stadion station, and while I had heard about the antics of these people before, I'd never imagined what I'd be in for.

All around the plaza that the monorail exits descended into were hundreds upon hundreds of people dressed head to toe in yak costumes. Some looked so authentic that I thought they must have been pelts or something. I remember complementing a guy on his outfit, and hearing him shout back a diatribe about how it had been illegally poached and he was only wearing it ironically. But then I heard him laughing with a bunch of friends and pointing at me, which made me wonder if he was just bulls%$tting me.

The match itself was hardly memorable. I can't remember any specifics... just that YKY lost and were relegated later that season. But I understood immediately the point of going to the team's matches. It wasn't for the actual sport, it was for the spectacle of being in the stands. Thousands of people dressed as Yaks, joining in unintelligible chants about topics completely unrelated to anything going on in the stadium.

So when I heard from Adrik again this year, inviting me to yet another Yaks match, I immediately told him yes. For personal reasons, I was eager to see him again, since he has an absolutely magnetic personality. But I also told my editor-in-chief I was going, and pitched to him the idea of a story on how the club has changed, given the sweeping alterations in our society over the last thirteen years.

I was thrilled to find that the club has hardly changed at all. When I got off at the appropriate monorail stop, this time dressed in more conservative attire (it was late October, which in the Panhandle is already winter), I saw roughly the same scene as last time. The first thing I noticed was a group of about a half dozen "Yaks" carrying the hugest pizza I have ever seen in to the stadium. The thing honestly must have been two meters across.

Adrik met me there in the plaza and, after sarcastically admonishing me for "forgetting" my yak costume, we strolled into the ground together. Zapadnaya Dyurtyuli Stadion, despite the aforementioned post-regime modernization of the Federation, is still a dump. I can't justify the use of any nicer term, because its concrete walls are dilapidated and it reeks of urine and spilled liquor. But it's home for YKY, and I get the feeling that they (the supporters, that is) wouldn't want to see it change in a thousand years.

Climbing the steps to Adrik's stomping ground, the general admission Fourth Stand (as its colloquially known), I remembered being here thirteen years ago. At the time of my previous trip, Yaks had been clinging on for dear life in the First Division, and were relegated later that year. This time, Adrik told me, his beloved black and gold team were residing in the second tier of the KPFA League.

And yet, the atmosphere, at least as far as I could tell, remained the same. What I didn't know was that Adrik had invited me to the match in which YKY would secure promotion back to the First Division... a moment of great joy for the club and its devotees.

In the midst of the raucous din, I could just see the match beginning. The home side were facing off against Knoxhaven FC, another Kagdaz side founded by English-speaking immigrants in Gelendzhik. My view of the contest was obscured; a pair of quite inebriated fans had raised a huge stuffed salamander into the air above them, and were reciting some sort of weird incantation that, I was told by Adrik, supposedly brought good luck to the Yaks.

Within moments, I overheard the first words of the now barely-familiar Yellowknife Theme Song being chanted at full voice by the throng of good-natured lunatics around me.

Let's open our cans,
And worship the ram
That lives so far up in the sky!
Oh, cabbage and beans;
Our favorite team
Will smell all our farts, my oh my!
Let's go YKY, let's go YKY
We'll never stop chanting your name!
Cuz the best kind of bread is rye!
Oh, the best kind of bread is rye!

Irreverent and irrelevant as always, I thought.

Two hours later, YKY were leading the visitors four goals to nil. Surely, it seemed to me, this ought to have been of some note to the gathered crowd around me. But they seemed resolute in their apathy to the action taking fold ahead of them. I couldn't seem to put together why they'd paid the fee to come here if they weren't going to be engaged in the sport.

What I didn't realize is that they were waiting for the public address system to release the scores of the other Second Division matches going on. "Krevetka 2, Dynamo 3," I heard the disembodied voice speak out.

And then they went absolutely nuts. The yaks costumes were cast aside as the YKY fans began whooping and cheering all around. One man, about two rows behind me, simply fainted when he heard the news. A middle-aged woman who looked like she ought to be a seamstress in some kind of Victorian clothing shop began hollering in some unknown tongue before simply French kissing a random man next to her.

These, I realized, were among the true sports fans in Kagdazka and Pazhujebu. Their loyalty was not so much due to the success of their team but the quality of the company they kept in being supporters. Adrik, I saw, was in tears, and looked very much like the young Bohemian I had met many years ago.

Things change in the world of sport, I mused. Most for the worst. But the things that remain the same, always the same, are what we ought to treasure the most.

by **Polar Islandstates** » Fri Mar 16, 2012 11:49 pm

Yes, its CdlP time.
As apparently, I haven't done one since last cutoff. Well done me, eh?
Well, here it is now anyway. Enjoy.
As per usual, stronger teams get byes to the first round and are seeds in the first round proper, all subsequent rounds are randomly drawn. A slightly more manageable number of 46 teams entered this cycle, meaning a preliminary round of 28, then straight to knockouts from 32 down to 2 in the final.
Trigrammes slightly made up, apologies if incorrect.

Qualifying Round
Club Stein-los (PAS) 2-0 Eau Claire United (DAR) (2-0 agg)
Eau Claire United (DAR) 3-2 Club Stein-los (PAS) (3-4 agg)

Pythons (QPM) 5-0 Harloop City (HLO) (5-0 agg)
Harloop City (HLO) 1-1 Pythons (QPM) (1-6 agg)

Vieux-Port FC (WHI) 1-0 Chahr North Stars (CRM) (1-0 agg)
Chahr North Stars (CRM) 0-4 Vieux-Port FC (WHI) (0-5 agg)

Mort Park (WZI) 0-0 SC Avenion (CHK) (0-0 agg)
SC Avenion (CHK) 1-1 Mort Park (WZI) (1-1 agg) (Mort Park (WZI) wins on away goals rule)

FC Cape St Paul (PIS) 3-1 EK888 (HLO) (3-1 agg)
EK888 (HLO) 0-3 FC Cape St Paul (PIS) (1-6 agg)

Walldrew (SAU) 1-2 Zebaki (MWE) (1-2 agg)
Zebaki (MWE) 0-1 Walldrew (SAU) (2-2 agg) (Zebaki (MWE) wins on away goals rule)

Internazcionale Eliodoro (ERA) 2-2 Drayfill Town (AEL) (2-2 agg)
Drayfill Town (AEL) 1-3 Internazcionale Eliodoro (ERA) (3-5 agg)

Royal Rumiatzi (ASG) 1-1 Doversham County (AEL) (1-1 agg)
Doversham County (AEL) 0-5 Royal Rumiatzi (ASG) (1-6 agg)

Fox Zero (CVC) 2-1 FC Charge (CRM) (2-1 agg)
FC Charge (CRM) 1-0 Fox Zero (CVC) (2-2 agg) (FC Charge (CRM) wins on away goals rule)

Olympique de Fontveille (VLD) 2-2 Rushmore Athletic (ANC) (2-2 agg)
Rushmore Athletic (ANC) 3-3 Olympique de Fontveille (VLD) (5-5 agg) (Olympique de Fontveille (VLD) wins on away goals rule)

Hreindýrsal Stríðsmaður (BLK) 1-0 Condensadores CD (OSD) (1-0 agg)
Condensadores CD (OSD) 1-3 Hreindýrsal Stríðsmaður (BLK) (1-4 agg)

SK Nethers United FC (TAE) 3-0 Yangeyange (DJO) (3-0 agg)
Yangeyange (DJO) 2-3 SK Nethers United FC (TAE) (2-6 agg)

Inima de Leu (ANT) 1-1 Ballymairead Town (ANC) (1-1 agg)
Ballymairead Town (ANC) 0-2 Inima de Leu (ANT) (1-3 agg)

Otomi Rétaro (AQU) 0-1 AS Débardeurs Nationale (OSD) (0-1 agg)
AS Débardeurs Nationale (OSD) 2-1 Otomi Rétaro (AQU) (3-1 agg)

First Round
Tanrısal (PAS) 1-1 Vieux-Port FC (WHI) (1-1 agg)
Vieux-Port FC (WHI) 2-0 Tanrısal (PAS) (3-1 agg)

Valengren Kickers (QPM) 4-1 Mort Park (WZI) (4-1 agg)
Mort Park (WZI) 0-2 Valengren Kickers (QPM) (1-6 agg)

Eastburg United (WHI) 3-0 Nhati Madini (DJO) (3-0 agg)
Nhati Madini (DJO) 0-2 Eastburg United (WHI) (0-5 agg)

Banks (WZI) 0-1 SK Nethers United FC (TAE) (0-1 agg)
SK Nethers United FC (TAE) 0-2 Banks (WZI) (1-2 agg)

East Franz Athletic (PIS) 2-0 Hreindýrsal Stríðsmaður (BLK) (2-0 agg)
Hreindýrsal Stríðsmaður (BLK) 0-1 East Franz Athletic (PIS) (0-3 agg)

Gilley FC (SAU) 0-2 Pythons (QPM) (0-2 agg)
Pythons (QPM) 5-0 Gilley FC (SAU) (7-0 agg)

Juvillian Martinax (ERA) 0-0 Internazcionale Eliodoro (ERA) (0-0 agg)
Internazcionale Eliodoro (ERA) 3-0 Juvillian Martinax (ERA) (3-0 agg)

Iturributa United (ASG) 2-1 FC Charge (CRM) (2-1 agg)
FC Charge (CRM) 2-2 Iturributa United (ASG) (3-4 agg)

TFC Lannymore (CVC) 1-0 FC Cape St Paul (PIS) (1-0 agg)
FC Cape St Paul (PIS)3-1 TFC Lannymore (CVC) (3-2 agg)

AS Bezieres (VLD) 1-1 Wana Wa Mungu (MWE) (1-1 agg)
Wana Wa Mungu (MWE) 4-2 AS Bezieres (VLD) (5-3 agg)

FF Berafjörðinn (BLK) 3-0 Inima de Leu (ANT) (3-0 agg)
Inima de Leu (ANT) 0-2 FF Berafjörðinn (BLK) (0-5 agg)

Laketown Rangers (TAE) 1-3 Zebaki (MWE) (1-3 agg)
Zebaki (MWE) 4-2 Laketown Rangers (TAE) (7-3 agg)

Frumoasa Lantern? (ANT) 2-0 Olympique de Fontveille (VLD) (2-0 agg)
Olympique de Fontveille (VLD) 2-0 Frumoasa Lantern? (ANT) (3-0 AET, 3-2 agg)

Bahía Rojo (AQU) 0-4 Club Stein-los (PAS) (0-4 agg)
Club Stein-los (PAS) 3-0 Bahía Rojo (AQU) (7-0 agg)

FC Stephani (CHK) 2-2 AS Débardeurs Nationale (OSD) (2-2 agg)
AS Débardeurs Nationale (OSD) 0-2 FC Stephani (CHK) (2-4 agg)

Menomonie United (DAR) 2-0 Royal Rumiatzi (ASG) (2-0 agg)
Royal Rumiatzi (ASG) 4-1 Menomonie United (DAR) (4-3 agg)

Second Round
Wana Wa Mungu (MWE) 0-6 Pythons (QPM) (0-6 agg)
Pythons (QPM) 3-0 Wana Wa Mungu (MWE) (9-0 agg)

FC Stephani (CHK) 2-1 Banks (WZI) (2-1 agg)
Banks (WZI) 5-1 FC Stephani (CHK) (6-3 agg)

Internazcionale Eliodoro (ERA) 2-4 Iturributa United (ASG) (2-4 agg)
Iturributa United (ASG) 2-0 Internazcionale Eliodoro (ERA) (6-2 agg)

Royal Rumiatzi (ASG) 0-2 Eastburg United (WHI) (0-2 agg)
Eastburg United (WHI) 0-2 Royal Rumiatzi (ASG) (1-2 AET, 3-2 agg)

Valengren Kickers (QPM) 1-4 FC Cape St Paul (PIS) (1-4 agg)
FC Cape St Paul (PIS) 3-1 Valengren Kickers (QPM) (7-2 agg)

Zebaki (MWE) 1-0 East Franz Athletic (PIS) (1-0 agg)
East Franz Athletic (PIS) 3-0 Zebaki (MWE) (3-1 agg)

Olympique de Fontveille (VLD) 3-2 Vieux-Port FC (WHI) (3-2 agg)
Vieux-Port FC (WHI) 0-0 Olympique de Fontveille (VLD) (2-3 agg)

FF Berafjörðinn (BLK) 3-2 Club Stein-los (PAS) (3-2 agg)
Club Stein-los (PAS) 2-1 FF Berafjörðinn (BLK) (4-4 agg) (Club Stein-los (PAS) wins on away goals rule)

Quarter Finals
Pythons (QPM) 1-1 Eastburg United (WHI) (1-1 agg)
Eastburg United (WHI) 1-2 Pythons (QPM) (2-3 agg)

East Franz Athletic (PIS) 2-1 Iturributa United (ASG) (2-1 agg)
Iturributa United (ASG) 1-1 East Franz Athletic (PIS) (2-3 agg)

Olympique de Fontveille (VLD) 1-1 Banks (WZI) (1-1 agg)
Banks (WZI) 2-4 Olympique de Fontveille (VLD) (3-5 agg)

Club Stein-los (PAS) 4-0 FC Cape St Paul (PIS) (4-0 agg)
FC Cape St Paul (PIS) 5-3 Club Stein-los (PAS) (5-7 agg)

Semi Finals
Club Stein-los (PAS) 3-1 Pythons (QPM) (3-1 agg)
Pythons (QPM) 0-0 Club Stein-los (PAS) (1-3 agg)

East Franz Athletic (PIS) 1-1 Olympique de Fontveille (VLD) (1-1 agg)
Olympique de Fontveille (VLD) 0-1 East Franz Athletic (PIS) (1-2 agg)

Final
East Franz Athletic (PIS) 1-1 Club Stein-los (PAS)
(1-1 AET, 1-1 agg, 4-3 PKs)

Congratulations to East Franz Athletic!
(OOC: Didn't seek third-party scorination as it's a ridiculous time of day and I'm only up for the Formula One. It was all simmed at once on NSFS, but if people don't trust me and there are suspicions of foul play I'd be more than happy to I'll re-sim the whole tournament)

All Rushmori nations, whether part of a multinational league or not, may submit two teams to enter next season's CdlP. Usually 3rd and 4th in the league, but its up to you. All entries from the last UICA cutoff to the next UICA cutoff will be counted, those that have already posted this cycle need not re-post their qualifiers, I will find them if you post them. Krytenian sides will be entering next cycle. Scared?

by **Harjeland** » Sat Mar 17, 2012 3:43 am

H A R J E L A N D

Season II Preview

Harjeland prepares for the second season of the StiggiBanka 1. Ligaen, with 12 teams again competing for the championship. Last season Knattspyrnufélag Stríðsær claimed the title on the last game of the season, stealing first place from under the noses of HK Fjóllbærin. The title race was limited two just two teams, while other favorites such as Knattspyrnufélag Bolúvík had disappointing seasons, and will aim to improve their results this season. Meanwhile, Knattspyrnufélag Krónur and Íþróttafélag Kópabyggð will be aiming to make good first impressions after being promoted from the 2. Ligaen.

Clubs

by **West Zirconia** » Sat Mar 17, 2012 4:12 am

The West Zirconian Cup:

First Round:
Mount Vernon 2-4 Redwood University
Felton Athletic 2-1 Elwell Harriers
Shrigley Town 1-2 Halliwell Wanderers
Parkfield Rangers 1-4 Knifton Town
St. Martin City 1-4 Stanley Athletic
Newby Town 1-1 Kingsley Town
Replay: Kingsley Town 0-0 Newby Town (0-1 AET)
St. Mark's College, Mort Park 2-1 New Scilly
KVV Koehorst 0-2 Hilton Athletic
Rothwell Temperance Society 2-1 Dutton United
St. Matthew's Moss 2-2 Anderton Town
Replay: Anderton Town 0-1 St. Matthew's Moss
Calland and Smallshaw 1-1 Wolverton Town
Replay: Wolverton Town 2-1 Calland and Smallshaw
Anderton United 2-3 Heppenstall Town
Corpus Christi 1-0 Oglesby United
FC Boston 2-3 Moorcroft Wanderers
Moorcroft College of Music 3-3 Sephton RMI
Replay: Sephton RMI 1-1 Moorcroft College of Music (1-1 AET) (Sephton RMI wins 3-1 on penalty kicks)
Underwood Town 2-1 Grimshaw Town
Stanton Vale 1-3 Walton
Oakley 2-1 West Coast Angels
Ainsworth and Wells 2-4 Houghton Eagles
Somerville Thistle 0-2 Kesterton

Second Round:
Corpus Christi 1-1 Sephton RMI
Replay: Sephton RMI 1-2 Corpus Christi
Newby Town 1-0 Redwood University
Walton 1-6 Halliwell Wanderers
Stanley Athletic 3-4 Hilton Athletic
Moorcroft Wanderers 4-2 Kesterton
Underwood Town 3-2 Houghton Eagles
Wolverton Town 2-0 St. Matthew's Moss
Felton Athletic 3-3 Oakley
Replay: Oakley 4-1 Felton Athletic
St. Mark's College, Mort Park 3-0 Rothwell Temperance Society
Heppenstall Town 4-4 Knifton Town
Replay: Knifton Town 1-1 Heppenstall Town (1-1 AET) (Knifton Town wins 3-2 on penalty kicks)

Third Round:
Hilton Athletic 2-1 Knifton Town
Eardley Town 1-0 McLaughlin Islands
Halliwell Wanderers 2-0 Moorcroft City
Skelton Town 2-0 St. Andrew's
Saint-Christophe 0-5 St. Martin Athletic
Oakley 4-2 Sephton County
Newby Town 0-2 Redwood Forest
St. Mark's College, Mort Park 3-0 Wolverton Town
Flockton Flavell 2-2 Ashton Rovers
Replay: Ashton Rovers 2-3 Flockton Flavell
Tîm Cymru 4-1 Kirkham Town
Corpus Christi 0-0 Culshaw Town
Replay: Culshaw Town 1-1 Corpus Christi (1-2 AET)
Kershaw Athletic 2-1 Buckby Town
New Toronto 1-3 Moorcroft Wanderers
Eastham Panthers 4-1 Underwood Town

Fourth Round:
Skelton Town 1-2 Hilton Athletic
Bradley Hornets 5-1 East Snaith
Moorcroft Wanderers 0-0 Currie
Replay: Currie 3-2 Moorcroft Wanderers
Redwood Forest 2-0 Wacker Neustadt
Eardley Town 1-1 Houghton Kestrels
Replay: Houghton Kestrels 2-0 Eardley Town
Corpus Christi 1-4 AFC Stanton
Eastham Panthers 2-0 Longshaw Town
Banks 2-2 Stanley United
Replay: Stanley United 3-1 Banks
St. Martin Athletic 0-1 Crompton Town
Etruria 0-2 Taylor's Cross
Halliwell Wanderers 2-3 Flockton Flavell
Kershaw Athletic 2-4 Markham
Oakley 2-2 Bradley Swifts
Replay: Bradley Swifts 6-2 Oakley
Tîm Cymru 2-4 Hyland Town
Mort Park 7-1 Houghton Hawks
Civil Service 3-1 St. Mark's College, Mort Park

Fifth Round:
Stanley United 0-2 Mort Park
Bradley Hornets 4-5 Civil Service
Flockton Flavell 1-1 Hilton Athletic
Replay: Hilton Athletic 4-2 Flockton Flavell
Taylor's Cross 3-1 AFC Stanton
Redwood Forest 3-1 Hyland Town
Bradley Swifts 2-1 Markham
Crompton Town 1-3 Houghton Kestrels
Eastham Panthers 0-1 Currie

Quarter-Finals:
Taylor's Cross 4-3 Hilton Athletic
Mort Park 3-1 Currie
Redwood Forest 1-2 Bradley Swifts
Civil Service 2-1 Houghton Kestrels

Semi-Finals:
Taylor's Cross 1-4 Mort Park
Mort Park 2-1 Taylor's Cross
Aggregate: Taylor's Cross 2-6 Mort Park

Bradley Swifts 3-2 Civil Service
Civil Service 1-2 Bradley Swifts
Aggregate: Bradley Swifts 5-3 Civil Service

Final:
Mort Park 4-2 Bradley Swifts (at Williamson Park, Banks)

Global Qualifiers:

Champions' Cup (and Copa de Campeones): Mort Park, Stanley United.
Globe Cup: Banks, Bradley Hornets, Taylor's Cross (first two also in Copa de los Principes)
SBCC: Redwood Forest, St. Martin Athletic, New Toronto, Kirkham Town.
Cygnus Cup: Mort Park.

International Domestic Soccer NewsWires

MIU Season 404

Who is online