Skyrim Declares Pony Genocide

[Clawhammers Skyrim]

Because it is such a stunning and original idea, I, High King Clawhammer, thus declare that every pony in Skyrim is to be massacred for no apparent reason!! All ponies shall die, because such a thing has never been done before!

Look at what a good dictator I am!! Killing ponies in an original fashion in no way designed to troll the CoPS.

So yes. We shall be killing all of the ponies, without explanation.

Love,
High King Clawhammer

Another Declaration

Please ignore the declarations of our King. There are no ponies in the country, so his declaration has no effect. He's a bit mentally unstable, and is convinced of the originality of such a plan.

Signed,
Thor,
High Councilor to the King

[Princess Luna]

To High King Clawhammer,

That made me smile. Very funny.

~ Princess Luna,
Supreme Co-Ruler of Equestria.

[Apoctis]

OOC:Pure Genius.,I love this

To High King Clawhammer
Why stop there? If you killed everyone it would be much more effective.
Blood for the Blood God!!
From Archaon

[Jion]

The Principality of Jion supports the massacre of this stupid Feddie creation.

[Ipeland]

Ipeland is willing to offer mental help for High King Clawhammer, as he is cleary deluded. We shall send some doctors and a large amount of pills.

Chris Griffen,
Ipeland President

OOC:

[Legionica]

Special Message from the Crown

Dear High King Clawhammer,

We here at Legionica applaud your idea, and would like to hear by officially applaud Clawhammer's Skyrim as a Defender of Justice and Man. A parade and an official holiday in Legionica will be declared upon the day that the first kill is made. Your Honor will have a statue commissioned in the Courtyard of the Palace, made of pure marble.

Long Live Clawhammer!

Signed,
Caesar Primis Sanguine
Emperor of Legionica

[Legokiller]

A voicemail to High King Clawhammer

"Seriously, you sound like some fail troll from the Legokiller government forums. Also I demand you to rename Skyrim into Equestrian Skyrim colony of Legokiller and surrender to Legokiller federal rule since if your for real, skyrim won't survive."

-President Rainbow Dash laughing out loud.

[Crystal Spires]

High Council Building in Caltris
Beastling States of Crystal Spires
7:30 AM MCST

The High Chancellor yawned as he went down the stairs from his room in the cloisters to his office. He sat down and fluffed his great white wings and looked at his unread communiques adjusting his monocle as his tired teal colored eyes hazed into focus. He brushed away his white feathery hair as his usual well groomed angelic features seemed to be absent in his exhuastion. He yawned as he scanned through the letters he received in the night spotting one that got his attention, and horror.

A PONY GENOCIDE? EGAD! This cannot be! Not another not obviously contrived situation that has been done to death a billion times so uncreatively that the CoPS is so unlikely to respond! This surely can't be another murderous rampage done by a wimpy man with the temper of a rampaging wolverine but the constitution of a three year old girl, BUGGER ME! NO, NO IT CANNOT BE! I in my hot blooded fashion as usual must rage inwardly and summon the awesomely equally hot blooded High Council who will obviously somehow share my personal beliefs on the matter for inexplicable reasons! he thought as he arranged the preparation of the High Council Meeting missing the second message to arrive on his desk.

High Council Chambers

And now commenced the ritualistic Spirean ceremonial nonsense that most people will glean over and dismiss because of the long wall o'text as the author breaks the 4th wall repeatedly.

"By the oversight of our Lord Fornt, I hearby declare this Legislative session open. We are here to discuss the new Charter for the Coalition of Ponyist States. Let it be reminded that we, who know of the dangers of Corruption more than anyone else, know that the punishment for corruption and betrayal of the people is death. Thus is it our solemn vow as Councilmen to act in what is the best for the Good and Welfare of All people." Maven said clearly in a solemn voice.

"The purity of heart, mind, and spirit is represented by words, thoughts, and actions. Councilmen! Every sentient being is responsible for their own words, thoughts, and actions and are obligated by law not to willingly commit harm to another sentient being with greed, hatred, or ignorance as a motivation." Jurgen said as he recited the religious texts with great power and force with great masculine pomp.

"And so we promise with our full hearts that we have not acted in hatred, greed, and that we are aware of every consequence of our actions." Maven recited as he put his hand over his heart and bowed.

"Be seated," Justine said with a sincere nod. "We shall make a decision with regards on how to confront the obviously serious nation of Skyrim, even though I'm sure that it is not serious at all because of plot obfuscating stupidity."

"A Word, High Council." Spoke a dark purple unicorn wearing dark rimmed glasses who shyly spoke over the Council murmuring

"The High Council Addresses the Representative of Starfold, Merris Quine."

"Because this obviously is an act against Spirean Charter this warrants a full condemnation by our beloved nation."

"Caltris Agrees."

"Starfold will too."

"Shaltric agrees."

"Merlon Rejects unilaterally this condemnation. I say we praise the-" the Merlonian delegate was moved to silence and then said "FINE, I WILL CONDEMN THEM. Fornt be praised."

"Sardoc is for the condemnation."

"Anherc will likely agree with condemnation."

"Tabrill is with the rest of the Council."

"Alright High Council, we present the proposal Docket GH-P1 We the people of Caltris Propose that the Beastling States Condemn the nation of Skyrim. All in favor to adopt the Charter, please sign now."

To: the Nation of Clawhammer's Skyrim,

From:The Beastling States of Crystal Spires

Encryption Level:None

Code: None

---

The High King of Skyrim,

We of Crystal Spires do find your behavior to be quite naughty and we scoff at your weak concept of national sovereignty and such, and we will proceed to hereby declare our intention to condemn you on behalf of our clearly ridiculously awesome nation of the Beastling States. We of the Beastling States demand that you comply with the following:

I. Ponies be given rights equal to every Citizen.

II. That you deport EVERY SINGLE PONY from your nations into the UEF aligned or CoPS Aligned nation and that no pony be harmed in the deportation process.

Including one of the previous options above. We further demand that the guilty parties involved in the unsolicited state murders and massacres and unsolicited detainment of ponies be tried in the fullest extent of the law for their crimes. Failure to perform this action will provoke an immediate response from the Beastling States. Including but not limited to:

Direct Military intervention
Police interventions
Travel Blacklists
Trade Blacklists
International Sanctions
Humanitarian intervention
Denial of access to all of our catgirl and bunnygirl pornography.

WE SHALL NOT BE SWAYED!

By Our Honor,

[Wellboneland]

Welboneland has a nuke. Yeah, stop killing the poor ponies or you go boom boom.

[Tarxejn]

If that is so, then we have war! I will send an army of 50 psychiatrists from the highest standard mental hospital to remove that monster called Madness.

Regards,
Prime Minister Victor Stafrace.

OOC: You made my day!

[Segland]

Oh, goodness. This is hilarious

[Chulainan]

This.is.hilarious.

good show old boy

[Danceria]

The only good xeno is a dead one. Friendship is Magic, and Magic is heresy, oh the amount of memes that is spreading from this thread makes me smile
The Royal Government of Danceria officially denounces and places sanctions on Clawhammer's Skyrim, and would like to extend a brief summit on how to aid/evacuate the potential victims of this genocide. Military action is expected, and we are at DEFCON 4, further intelligence is needed and coordinated strike teams are being trained for any possible outcomes in this nation.