Awesome/Funny NS quotes (not your own quotes, please)

[Minoriteeburg]

Woah, Zilam said that? Isn't he like, Christian?

He's a common sense and realistic thought based kind.

Zilam is good people.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Ok, everyone calm down! Com'on, it's time to start Wiki-Gate!

Someone needs to create flashy images, intense music, and someone try to make a story for why Wiki is down, involving drugs, prostitute, and Michelle Obama, GO!

[Nightkill the Emperor]

I would if it was Reagan's urine. I'd eat that chicken all fucking night long.

[Caninope]

And that's why I drink.

Hey! Me too!

I'd be more amazed to find a Generalite who didn't drink. Who's over the age. Of course.

[The Blaatschapen]

And that's why I drink.

Hey! Me too!

Pfft, you guys still needs reasons to drink

[Panzerjaeger]

Any posts made by Panzerjaeger pertaining to Nazis and Jews.

My Nazi and Jew post quota then must take a dramatic upswing! Huzzah for the 5 Post Plan!

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

If you outlaw heterosex only outlaws will heterosexualize!- SaintB in a TG.

A drama QUEER? I've never heard that, but it seems to be doubly insulting. I'm very proud of you.- Galloism

A vagina is not a clown car.- Zilam, I think

NSG, the scary match maker.- Neesika

Woah, Zilam said that? Isn't he like, Christian?

I think that quote was his and it was said quite a while ago. Not sure why him being Christian would prevent him from saying something so common sense as this, though.

[Fartsniffage]

Woah, Zilam said that? Isn't he like, Christian?

I think that quote was his and it was said quite a while ago. Not sure why him being Christian would prevent him from saying something so common sense as this, though.

Someone needs to build a vagina shaped clown car.

Where's LG when you need him?

[Arkinesia]

All from my sig, all hilarious.

and 44% of all US prisoners are black so I guess we had better legalize that too then?

Are we sure it's your heart and not your penis?

Did you ever see a fluttering penis?

Ladies Man

defined as

Thai stripper

[Sunny Marionette]

What about the one about mandarin chinese and viagra? I always liked that one.

[Czardas]

A brief selection from IRC quotefile/past sigs:

[19:26] <Working-Kzintosh> Revenge is a dish best served overdone and on fire.

[06:49]<Katganistan>I'm not crying, I'm not sulking, but I am thinking....
[06:49]<Katganistan>and she's all like, WHAT'S THE MATTER?!
[06:49]<Scolopendra>Well, matter is an extremely dense form of energy.

[22:35]<Melkor>okay, new rule
[22:36]<Melkor>if your rap sheet is long neough that the mod who posts it in IRC gets floodkicked
[22:36]<Melkor>guess what that means
[22:36]<Katganistan>you DIE
[22:36]<Katganistan>DIE
[22:36]<Katganistan>DIE DIE DIE
[22:36]<Katganistan>why are you all looking at me like that?

[22:39] <AirHippo> I've not liked maths since I was about eight and discovered it was the single most gallingly unpleasant, unfulfilling, unrewarding, frustrating, incomprehensible activity known to man; worse, even, than playing badminton.

Back in my day we had much better nostalgia than this. ~ Ifreann

[18:04] <Sigma|Moves> has to go upstairs, that much shattering glass couldnt have been good
[18:04] <Alakantar_Aleanrahel> o.o
[18:04] <Alakantar_Aleanrahel> What?
[18:11] <Sigma|Moves> okay, dad is arranging all of his empty wine bottles in the front window and putting christmas lights in them. That was the sound of ten 1.5 liter wine bottles exploding

If it looks like a duck, and sounds like a duck, it may or may not actually be a duck...but are you willing to take the chance and let that duck give you socialized medicine? ~ Flameswroth

[22:54] <Skeelzania> Youre full of shit, old man. Cause youre incontinent
[22:55] <Webster> If I was incontinent I'd most certainly not be full of shit!

Psychology is nothing but a mass of conflicting doctrines practiced by people who just want your money, use strange terms referring to abstractions often lacking rigorous empirical study and often molest you.

Religion is nothing like that. ~ RepentNowOrPayLater

"People are like Slinkys; generally useless, but I smile when one tumbles down stairs." ~ Lunatic Goofballs, quoting a bumper sticker

[22:23] <Indy> While jello is awesome, I doubt its ability to generate hydroelectric power...

and probably many more good ones but my quote file is a bitch to find stuff in.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

What about the one about mandarin chinese and viagra? I always liked that one.

viewtopic.php?p=4900184#p4900184

[South Asia Minor]

On a scale of 1 to hard, it's Ron Jeremy after 6 viagras.- Yootopia, on the difficulties of learning Mandarin.

The single greatest quote NS will ever generate. Apart from all the other ones.

[Mediterreania]

It's pretty obvious Stalin wasn't a true scotsman. He never even wore a kilt.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

On a scale of 1 to hard, it's Ron Jeremy after 6 viagras.- Yootopia, on the difficulties of learning Mandarin.

The single greatest quote NS will ever generate. Apart from all the other ones.

That was, indeed, an awesome quote.

I'm also trying to remember a quote by Neesika that Luna Amore had on his sig for a long time. It was something about 'You create, I destroy. I'm the huge penis to your hymen'. Or something similar. It was hilarious.

[Mediterreania]

Not to mention that FreeAgency quote about the shellfish.

[Maltropia]

I scoff at your billions!

From the "Who would win in a war between you and the person above you?" thread, by a nation of 30 million.

Admiral Ackbar every time

I lol'ed. But let's not get into a Picard verus Ackbar argument.

It's a trap.

From a "Kirk Vs Picard" thread.

Would you like anyone to help clean up Ardchoille?

Y'know, I wasn't sure whether this was directed to me (as in, you've offered to help do the cleaning) or to Sedge ...

Christantle and Sedge ride down the dusty main street, silhouetted against the sunset.

Old codger: "Whut brings you here, strangers?"

Christantle: "Duty. We gonna clean up Ardchoille."

*Sedge spits, hauls lawbook out of saddlebag, unrolls subpoena*

Voiceover: It was a dirty job, but somebody had to do it ...

*cue series theme song: Lawwww-man, Law-mannnn*

Personally, I think Jedward are a godsend for combatting the stereotyping of Europeans.

I mean, when Americans think of Europe, they tend to think of culture, academia, art and elegance.
Jedward help combat this!

Also, THIS entire thread.
And THIS one.
And THIS one.

[Buffett and Colbert]

I used to keep more funny ones in my sig, but now have made it more about me...

[Izandai]

I remember one that went something like this:

Hath and Aure, parked beneath a tree... Oh my god that car is shaking fast. -Con

I probably got the names wrong, so don't be mad if your name is where it shouldn't be.

[Horsefish]

The ones in my sig.

Also does anyone have a link to the one that turned LOTR into frodos quest for poon? That was fucking epic.

[Norstal]

The ones in my sig.

Also does anyone have a link to the one that turned LOTR into frodos quest for poon? That was fucking epic.

Nana has that in the first page, I think.

[Vectrova]

Didn't tactical grace make a great one once upon a time? Something about the thread being 100% certified content-free?

[Conserative Morality]

Shameless self-promotion...

Don't worry, when I'm famous, I'll let all of you know.

Twenty years later...

B&C: "Hey General, I'm Secretary General of the UN! Muhahahaha!"

New Poster: "You're the what of the who?"

Old Poster: "Aww. Buffy thinks he's an adult. *ruffles hair*"

CM: "I thought you were going to be someone important."

[Buffett and Colbert]

Shameless self-promotion...

Twenty years later...

B&C: "Hey General, I'm Secretary General of the UN! Muhahahaha!"

New Poster: "You're the what of the who?"

Old Poster: "Aww. Buffy thinks he's an adult. *ruffles hair*"

CM: "I thought you were going to be someone important."

This was a good one.

[Conserative Morality]

Also, more self-promotion, this one more serious than funny.

Yes. It is a victory for the common people, as the victory of the Union was one for Democracy and Freedom against the petty tyranny of the aristocracy and regional divisions. It is a victory for the men who marched out onto the field of battle and laid down their lives for the United States of America, the men who gave up everything for their country. They may rest in peace with their cause won, they may rest forever as heroes of this country. They may know that their efforts did not go to waste, they may know that the Union stood, god willing may it stand forevermore. For what is the common man but what he believes in? Without belief, we have only survival, with only survival, there is no hope, no greater purpose, not even hedonism. The beliefs of the common man are his cause, the sacrifice of the common man is his victory.