[title] Fine Time (alt: @@NAME@@'s Richest Having a Fine Time if it's too subtle)
[validity] has capitalism
[description] After drunkenly lighting several trees on fire in a zone of @@NAME@@ National Park that he had illegally camped in, threatening some nearby children with violence if they "told on him", declaring that zone of the park an independent tax haven and branding you as a "fascist dictator", local billionaire Jellon Mezos incurred a massive fine. The problem -- Mr Mezos earns so much money, he regained the amount he lost due to the fine within a matter of minutes.
[option] "This is absolutely preposterous!" yells your bad-tempered Minister of Justice as he throws darts at a printed out photo of Mr Mezos' face. "A working class @@DEMONYM@@ who committed the same crime would have had to take out a second mortgage just to pay that fine! These fines don't affect these rich fat cats at all! I propose we make fines proportional to the income of the offender. Maybe then Mr Mezos and others would think twice before flagrantly violating our laws."
[effect] parking citations for millionaires make up the majority of the government’s revenue
[option] "Hey, woah, woah, let's calm down a little. None of this is a big deal!" says Mr Mezos, who bribed your receptionist in order to be able to attend this meeting. "So what if I'm loaded with cash. My factory workers made it for me fair and square! Fining me more money just because I'm not a peasant living paycheck-to-paycheck is literally discrimination! While you're at it, you should introduce a flat tax rate so that everyone, regardless of economic status, pay the same in taxes as well. You wouldn't want everyone seeing you as a prejudiced leader, would you?"
[effect] tax cuts are being rewarded to the rich for their taxing jobs
[option] "The real question here is: how could such a heinous crime be punished only by forking over a pathetic sum of cash?" inquires Judge @@RANDOMNAME@@, who suspiciously looks very similar to the CEO of the largest private prison corporation in the United Federation. "The despicable deed of... uh... being publicly intoxicated in our national park is unpatriotic! It's disgraceful, as are other crimes such as public urination, which are only punished by fines at the moment. We should get rid of fining people and instead send them all to a vacation at my- I mean our prisons, and maybe then we can actually get some law and order for once."
[effect] serial killers share cells with serial jaywalkers
Hey all! This is my second issue, so feedback would be appreciated! Inspired by Jeff Bezos reveiving $16k in parking tickets.