Title: Check Your Voicemail Inbox
The Issue: "Please enter your password. [...] You have... 3... unheard messages."
Validity: Somewhat scientifically advanced; Somewhat economically free (by capitalist or socialist standards)
Option 1: "Hi @@LEADER@@, it's me, @@RANDOMFIRSTNAME@@. I'm sorry I missed your call, but I... you know, I can't even see who's calling me with the amount of robocalls I get these days. I have three calling me right now! It's just unbelievable. I don't mean to come across as telling you what ought be done, but personally I think they'd best be banned outright. When I get or make a phone call, I want a real person on the other end of the line; not some pre-recorded and unresponsive robot. Anyway, enough about that; call me back whenever you get the chance. Bye-bye."
[effect] angry phone calls are being rapidly replaced with in-person confrontations
Option 2: "Hello. This is an automated recorded message sent by the Department of Communications. We are sorry we could not get to your call, as we are experiencing busier-than-usual phone traffic. We want to remind you that you can call us back at any time, day or night, and one of our friendly staff members will do their best to answer your call at their earliest convenience. Otherwise, if you'd like to be forwarded to our automated help desk, please press 3 after dialing our number. Thank you."
[effect] people don't answer phones anymore
Option 3: "This is... All-Nation Insurance... warning you that this is your last chance. Please contact us within the next... 4 business days... to apply for a new credit card for an exclusive chance to win up to 15% off your first credit card purchase at All-Nation. Please give us your: Name. Phone number. Bank account information. Date of birth. Physical and mailing address. Occupation. Annual income. and. ID Number. Or you will not be eligible. Reply to us as soon as possible."
[effect] an unusually high number of political debates feature insurance and hip replacement advertisements
