[Draft] Addressing the War on Drugs

[Honeydewistania]

Greetings esteemed colleagues in the World Assembly,

No, I did not accidentally post a GA thread in the SC forum. Rather, I have taken the big step of drafting the very first proposal in the "declaration" category which may be coming to a Security Council near you. Please review the proposal and applaud my genius. Thanks.

Regards,

Benji Schubert Hepperle
Ambassador to the WA

The Security Council,

Mostly glad that the very much esteemed Security Council of the equally esteemed World Assembly has introduced new methods to further bloat the egos of control freaks and create more useless drama and politicking within our impeccably esteemed halls,

Extremely insistent, however, that the Security Council utilises one of the first resolutions of this new category to address one of the most important and controversial topics that plague the extraordinarily esteemed member nations of the World Assembly, the “War on Drugs”,

Totally convinced by the overwhelming evidence available to the esteemed eyeballs of the delegations of the World Assembly that there is a clear winner to this “War on Drugs”, and that the World Assembly needs to swiftly act upon this evidence to make a rather useful declaration that will hopefully lead to a conclusion of this “War on Drugs”,

Hereby declares “Drugs” as the winner of the “War on Drugs”.

[Weed]

This is something I could support.

[Bhang Bhang Duc]

One could assume from the tone of the draft that you’re not overly enamoured with the new Declaration category.

Illegal for real world reference, “war on drugs”?

[Honeydewistania]

One could assume from the tone of the draft that you’re not overly enamoured with the new Declaration category.

Illegal for real world reference, “war on drugs”?

I guess it could be changed to "battle on substance abuse" or "the fight against narcotics" for extra legality

[Outer Sparta]

Ope I thought it was another GA proposal. The declaration category would be an interesting thing to experiment with, so I am not totally and utterly opposed until the draft takes more shape.

[Sedgistan]

A general mod note - I would recommend seeking a legality ruling prior to submitting Declaration proposals, while we work out how the rules apply to them. This particularly applies if you're intending to spend stamps on campaigning.

[Greater Cesnica]

Tentative support pending legality ruling.

[Wallenburg]

Deputy Representative Holt, his hair showing signs of grey on the sides, emerges from the fifth subbasement of the Security Council complex. Great bags hang under his eyes. His nails have grown noticeably long, cut crudely by whatever blade he could get his hands on in the last two years trapped in the Security Council's ACME Temporal Recalibration Vault. Stumbling along only half-aware of his surroundings, he careens into a drafting room. After some false starts, he finds an empty chair with a copy of the proposed bill before it.

He sits. Scanning the page, his eyes narrow. "I...I don't...can we do this? This doesn't look like any Security Council resolution I've ever seen." He looks up to Ambassador Hepperle. "Wait, are you...real? Am I dreaming? I feel weird, like I haven't spoken or walked or breathed in two years."

[Trellania]

Dame Allania Trueblood wanders in, looking even more lost than normal.

"I... what is this place?"

She stops, then looks at the proposal at hand.

"Um... Sure, I guess? I see no reason not to support this."

[Honeydewistania]

Deputy Representative Holt, his hair showing signs of grey on the sides, emerges from the fifth subbasement of the Security Council complex. Great bags hang under his eyes. His nails have grown noticeably long, cut crudely by whatever blade he could get his hands on in the last two years trapped in the Security Council's ACME Temporal Recalibration Vault. Stumbling along only half-aware of his surroundings, he careens into a drafting room. After some false starts, he finds an empty chair with a copy of the proposed bill before it.

He sits. Scanning the page, his eyes narrow. "I...I don't...can we do this? This doesn't look like any Security Council resolution I've ever seen." He looks up to Ambassador Hepperle. "Wait, are you...real? Am I dreaming? I feel weird, like I haven't spoken or walked or breathed in two years."

Mr Hepperle chuckles. "Welcome to the real world, my friend." He then opens up his two palms, revealing two pills, one red and one blue. "You take the blue pill, and the story ends. You wake up writing Security Council proposals by the archaic rules and formats imposed upon us since the dawn of time. You take the red pill, and well, you get high and decide to write a proposal to declare drugs as the winner in a war against an imaginary opponent. I think you can guess what I chose."

[Trellania]

Mr Hepperle chuckles. "Welcome to the real world, my friend." He then opens up his two palms, revealing two pills, one red and one blue. "You take the blue pill, and the story ends. You wake up writing Security Council proposals by the archaic rules and formats imposed upon us since the dawn of time. You take the red pill, and well, you get high and decide to write a proposal to declare drugs as the winner in a war against an imaginary opponent. I think you can guess what I chose."

Dame Allania promptly grabs and downs both pills, just to see what would happen or if that will allow her to make some sense of the WA building.

[Wallenburg]

Before Holt can answer, Dame Allania has already swallowed both pills. He frowns. "Mixing drugs is dangerous, Miss. Anyway, I'm rather confused by the contents of your proposal. What is the 'war on drugs'? Judging by your behavior, it would seem to be a widespread conflict fueled by soldiers coked out of their mind. I am afraid, however, I am unaware of which member states are currently engaged in it."

[Honeydewistania]

Before Holt can answer, Dame Allania has already swallowed both pills. He frowns. "Mixing drugs is dangerous, Miss. Anyway, I'm rather confused by the contents of your proposal. What is the 'war on drugs'? Judging by your behavior, it would seem to be a widespread conflict fueled by soldiers coked out of their mind. I am afraid, however, I am unaware of which member states are currently engaged in it."

"Uhh.... Um mm.... errr" stutters Mr Hepperle, as he stumbles and falls flat on his face. Mr Wrigglesworth emerges from the shadows of a dark corner in the office. "Mr Hepperle appears to be unconscious. When he wakes up, he could probably give you your answer." Mr Wrigglesworth then slides back into the corner of irrelevancy in an eerie fashion.

[Trellania]

Before Holt can answer, Dame Allania has already swallowed both pills. He frowns. "Mixing drugs is dangerous, Miss. Anyway, I'm rather confused by the contents of your proposal. What is the 'war on drugs'? Judging by your behavior, it would seem to be a widespread conflict fueled by soldiers coked out of their mind. I am afraid, however, I am unaware of which member states are currently engaged in it."

Dame Allania would respond to Holt, were she not so busy staring at a potted plant. Or, at least, what she thinks is a potted plant.

"You look like you need watered," she mutters to Holt before she turns and stumbles off. She returns within mere seconds carrying a watering can, which she then tries to pour on Holt's feet. From the smell of the watering can, it's full of pure ethanol.

"Drink up, little bush... Grow nice and tall..."

And her actions prove that not only have Drugs won the war on drugs, they've also made inroads in getting World Assembly representation.

[Honeydewistania]

Mr Hepperle yawns and rubs his eyes. "Ughhhhhh" he groans, having spent the last few hours in an uncomfortable position under his desk. He finds himself lying a puddle of a strange, foul-smelling liquid. "For fucks sake, not again... I can't believe I p- oh, wait. Ah. It seems that zany Trellanian ambassador had poured ethanol all over people in this office. I can live with that." He tries to recall what he meant to reply to the Holt that wasn't incoherent ramblings. "Ah yes. The war on drugs is not a battle between junkie soldiers, no. It is rather a symbolic umbrella term for the declaration against drugs by almost every member nation of this World Assembly. It seems that despite the aggressive and violent clampdown of drugs, drugs still prevails, so it makes complete sense to declare drugs as the winner in this bout against all odds. Does that clarify things for you?" Before Mr Hepperle can say one more word, he throws up his intestines in a nearby dustbin.

[Honeydewistania]

hereby bumps this thread

[The Python]

Against, this is unnecessary imo, and if it was this should be in the GA.

[Bears Armed]

OOC: Count me among the people who would regard the term "the War on Drugs", at least if used without a clear definition actually within the proposal, as a RL Reference.

[Hanovereich]

OOC: Count me among the people who would regard the term "the War on Drugs", at least if used without a clear definition actually within the proposal, as a RL Reference.

OOC: Yes, if capitalised, but if it was lowercase it could be considered to be the metephorical ‘war’ against illegal drugs in general. Still supporting your point, and this proposal’s concept.

[Honeydewistania]

Against, this is unnecessary imo, and if it was this should be in the GA.

Yes, because every other declaration is totally necessary.

OOC: Count me among the people who would regard the term "the War on Drugs", at least if used without a clear definition actually within the proposal, as a RL Reference.

I’ll change it... soon.

[Honeydewistania]

A general mod note - I would recommend seeking a legality ruling prior to submitting Declaration proposals, while we work out how the rules apply to them. This particularly applies if you're intending to spend stamps on campaigning.

I'd like a legality ruling please

[Sedgistan]

The quote was from June when Declarations were new. We don't do blanket legality rulings for them any more, since Declarations have been around several months. What aspect of the proposal are you concerned violates which rule?

[Honeydewistania]

The quote was from June when Declarations were new. We don't do blanket legality rulings for them any more, since Declarations have been around several months. What aspect of the proposal are you concerned violates which rule?

I’d like to know if the ‘war on drugs’ is a RL reference and thus illegal

[WayNeacTia]

The quote was from June when Declarations were new. We don't do blanket legality rulings for them any more, since Declarations have been around several months. What aspect of the proposal are you concerned violates which rule?

I’d like to know if the ‘war on drugs’ is a RL reference and thus illegal

It was a phrase coined by George Bush. It really shouldn't be a real life reference.

[HISPIDA]

I’d like to know if the ‘war on drugs’ is a RL reference and thus illegal

It was a phrase coined by George Bush. It really shouldn't be a real life reference.

by nixon, actually.