[PASSED] Commend Altmoras

[The Python]

ok I guess I'll remove that bit then

No, just be creative. “Creating and managing secret channels of communication.....” would work.

How about this:

"Creating and managing channels of communication for Lazarenes that lasted from 2016 until the fall of the illegitimate Khanate coup government in 2018"

[Bhang Bhang Duc]

No, just be creative. “Creating and managing secret channels of communication.....” would work.

How about this:

"Creating and managing channels of communication for Lazarenes that lasted from 2016 until the fall of the illegitimate Khanate coup government in 2018"

Works for me. Minor point - I think using “coup” is redundant as you have already described the Khanate government as illegitimate.

[The Python]

Made some stylistic changes suggested by Westinor!

[Warzone Codger]

Support. Altmoras is a leading moralist of our time.

[The Python]

Support. Altmoras is a leading moralist of our time.

Thanks!

[The Python]

Fixed an inaccuracy pointed out by Stalker!

[ROM]

Okay - while I think Altmoras could be Commended, I'm not sure if this is the draft that will do that. It just comes off as clunky, doesn't really go into detail the things that are Commend-worthy... like as others have mentioned, go into more detail in his involvement in Hell, and idk if Alt's time in Lazarus really needs to be here either. Personally I feel like Alt is right there where a really good draft would make me support it, but I think he still has plenty of GP stuff he is yet to do that could be eventually be included on a Commend draft so idk if now is the best time for this.

[HumanSanity]

In the Hell clause, I think more on Horsemen of the Apocalypse, Altmoras' role in it, and why it is Commendable would be appropriate. Consistently leading a faction of that size, success, and activity can merit its own independent clause. Then you can eliminate the bullet points in the Hell clause (they're needlessly clunky) and increase some argumentation in the Hell clause about why service to Hell is Commendable. You've also misspelled the word "accurately".

The Lazarus clause is a clause that, in my opinion, has conceptual potential but could use some work. I think some spare words in the LLA clause could be eliminated (e.g. "following Funkadelia's resignation" and "across NationStates"). This clause also can/should be expanded to include more about what resources the LLA generally brought to the table during Alt's leadership, what improvements Alt made to the LLA's structure/leadership, and maybe 1-2 more operations the LLA was involved in. The Delegate bullet point should be extrapolated to include at least 1 accomplishment as Delegate. I'm also unsure why saying that Funk proceeded to coup the region helps your argument.

I don't understand why a singular term as Speaker of the Assembly in TRR without any specific reforms or accomplishments merits inclusion in a Commendation. I've never had one of these jobs, but they're not exactly revolutionary work in my experience.

I don't have significant thoughts on the Celebrating clause, perhaps someone with more r/d historical knowledge in the 2016-present era could help assess if this hits the high points or not.

For the TGW clause, you need to push this beyond positions alone to include roles and accomplishments. What did/does Altmoras do as a Warden-Commander? You do this to some extent in the High Constable clause, but more detail wouldn't hurt anyone.

I think the Singapore clause should be reframed to focus more on Alt's role in coordinating with the natives of Singapore to set up a Delegate imposed password as part of an effort supporting broader defending. Liberations/Liberation Repeals aren't actually difficult to write, it's more about the work that goes into setting them up and coordinating with natives and the connection of that work to the cause overall. The resolution should be referenced as more of a footnote than the centerpiece.

Personally I feel like Alt is right there where a really good draft would make me support it, but I think he still has plenty of GP stuff he is yet to do that could be eventually be included on a Commend draft so idk if now is the best time for this.

I've never found this objection particularly persuasive. If a nominee is Commendable, they should be Commended. Predicting the future of their accomplishments is difficult and it's always a hunch, when instead we could take what we have in the resolution and the nominee's accomplishments, size it up, and give it a yes.

[Fauxia]

Okay - while I think Altmoras could be Commended, I'm not sure if this is the draft that will do that. It just comes off as clunky, doesn't really go into detail the things that are Commend-worthy... like as others have mentioned, go into more detail in his involvement in Hell, and idk if Alt's time in Lazarus really needs to be here either. Personally I feel like Alt is right there where a really good draft would make me support it, but I think he still has plenty of GP stuff he is yet to do that could be eventually be included on a Commend draft so idk if now is the best time for this.

is Alt super involved anywhere that I don't know about? Because how much more is there to say about TGW and Hell? Asking honestly.

Anyway, that objection is usually used for young players. Alt has been around a while and I think there is probably enough for a good draft.

[The Python]

In the Hell clause, I think more on Horsemen of the Apocalypse, Altmoras' role in it, and why it is Commendable would be appropriate. Consistently leading a faction of that size, success, and activity can merit its own independent clause. Then you can eliminate the bullet points in the Hell clause (they're needlessly clunky) and increase some argumentation in the Hell clause about why service to Hell is Commendable. You've also misspelled the word "accurately".

Fixed

The Lazarus clause is a clause that, in my opinion, has conceptual potential but could use some work. I think some spare words in the LLA clause could be eliminated (e.g. "following Funkadelia's resignation" and "across NationStates"). This clause also can/should be expanded to include more about what resources the LLA generally brought to the table during Alt's leadership, what improvements Alt made to the LLA's structure/leadership, and maybe 1-2 more operations the LLA was involved in. The Delegate bullet point should be extrapolated to include at least 1 accomplishment as Delegate. I'm also unsure why saying that Funk proceeded to coup the region helps your argument.

To be honest, I'd need to do more research on Alt's achievements as delegate of Lazarus and Leader of the LCA.

For the TGW clause, you need to push this beyond positions alone to include roles and accomplishments. What did/does Altmoras do as a Warden-Commander? You do this to some extent in the High Constable clause, but more detail wouldn't hurt anyone.

Would this be better for Warden-Commander part?

I think the Singapore clause should be reframed to focus more on Alt's role in coordinating with the natives of Singapore to set up a Delegate imposed password as part of an effort supporting broader defending. Liberations/Liberation Repeals aren't actually difficult to write, it's more about the work that goes into setting them up and coordinating with natives and the connection of that work to the cause overall. The resolution should be referenced as more of a footnote than the centerpiece.

Is this better?

Okay - while I think Altmoras could be Commended, I'm not sure if this is the draft that will do that. It just comes off as clunky, doesn't really go into detail the things that are Commend-worthy... like as others have mentioned, go into more detail in his involvement in Hell, and idk if Alt's time in Lazarus really needs to be here either. Personally I feel like Alt is right there where a really good draft would make me support it, but I think he still has plenty of GP stuff he is yet to do that could be eventually be included on a Commend draft so idk if now is the best time for this.

is Alt super involved anywhere that I don't know about? Because how much more is there to say about TGW and Hell? Asking honestly.

Anyway, that objection is usually used for young players. Alt has been around a while and I think there is probably enough for a good draft.

Is as in present tense, not really, but in past tense was delegate of Lazarus and also was Speaker and leader of their defender military, as well as speaker of The Rejected Realms.

[The Python]

Bump

Also made a few changes to the Lazarus clause to add some achievements as delegate (reviving some dispatches about Lazarus and the endotarting one)

[The Python]

Bumpity bump

[HumanSanity]

I think the N-Day section could do a better job explaining why that is commendable. Thermonuclear dominance is not necessarily commendable. I think it can be explained, but it does require explanation. Also, I am unsure how Horsemen both won in 2018 and were eclipsed in 2018.

As leader of the LLA, what efforts did Altmoras make to build the organization? Did they recruit new members and if so how? Under their leadership, not only what operations did they participate in but what kind of activity and resources was the LLA bringing to the faction?

I am not entirely convinced that the TRR Speaker section should be included. Clerical administrative positions largely do not merit standalone clauses in Commendations.

The TGW section needs a lot of love still. It mostly focuses on positions held, outside of a little rhetorical flourish in the High Constable section (which, again, just says they led TGW but not that they did anything useful as leader of TGW). What has Alt done in those positions and why were those actions significant?

This draft has come a long way. Best of luck with it.

[The Python]

Bumped to last call, most likely will be submitted in 1 or 2 days.

Hello, delegate %NATION%!

I ask you to approve my SC proposal to commend Altmoras. Altmoras is a nation that has significantly contributed to the defender cause, and also helped build the community in Lazarus and Hell. The proposal I am asking you to approve can be found here. Here are a few of Altmoras' achievements through their time on NationStates:

• Led the Horsemen of the Apocalypse, Hell's N-Day faction, into first place victory in 2019 and second place in 2018,
• Been a great leader in The Order of the Grey Wardens, a renowned defender organisation, in 2016 - 2017, and participate in at least 3,000 defensive operations with the Grey Wardens,
• Served as delegate and Speaker of Lazarus during the control of the Humane Republic, and also created Lazarus' first Discord server,
• Last but not least, recruiting in Hell, serving as Astaroth (an elder position in Hell) and just being a general leader in the region

Thank you for you time!
^-^ Python

[Tinhampton]

I intend to abstain on this matter. While I cannot support any attempt to paint CAIN in a positive light, my region stands against both communism and fascism and - in any event - Altmoras has done much good in many regions.

[Fauxia]

Oh yeah, I agree with Tin on that. I don't think mentioning CAIN is a very good idea.

[The Python]

Oh yeah, I agree with Tin on that. I don't think mentioning CAIN is a very good idea.

OK, mentions of CAIN have been removed.

Just waiting to get a bit more feedback before this is submitted.

[The Python]

This has been submitted.

[The Stalker]

Strong support for this, Alt is a great dude and Hell wouldn't be what it is without him. He has more than earned his Commending in my eyes.

[Outer Sparta]

This has been submitted.

Draft looks well-written and their accomplishments are detailed. Support.

[The Python]

This has been submitted.

Draft looks well-written and their accomplishments are detailed. Support.

Strong support for this, Alt is a great dude and Hell wouldn't be what it is without him. He has more than earned his Commending in my eyes.

Thank you!

This has reached quorum now.

[The Python]

And... this is at vote!

Sheinbi, Tinhampton, Greater Cesnica, New Herdon, Boris Cult, Baloo Kingdom, Courelli, Dilber, Brox Deu, North Sonovia, One Small Island, Otaku Stratus, Castelia, Meretica, Indusse, Narvatus, Media Rater, Reultan, Calamari Lands, Draavida, Alcala-Cordel, Paleocacher, Koxor, Nghymru, N E A C, Communo-Slavocia, Haven Ray, Inner Urkey Gres Lair, Krezenel, Floyssauu, Srotino, Roma Sparta, Rhode 1sland, The Stalker, Leria, Zukchiva, J-O-E, Republic of Dixie, Sun Burst, Stedinia, Qudrath, The Fire Born, The Socialist Republic of Alaska, Tomisburg, Beepee, The Hard Part, Thermodolia, Avian Collector, The Independent States of Allied Forces, Pastries, Castle Federation, Wischland, West Selania, Panther, Noble Titans, SomethingFireRelated, Zarnath 2, Candensia, Vanra, TESDAI, Karteria, West Xanathananos, McMasterdonia, Dracolia

[Bhang Bhang Duc]

I have found the writing a little clunky in places, but you’ve done the research and made a convincing case for Commendation.

I have recommended a “For” vote to TWP’s Delegate.

[Bears Armed]

Hell wouldn't be what it is without him.

Now there is a line that one doesn't see very often!

[Northern Connecticut]

This is personally offensive to me. The Devil and hell represent literal evil in my eyes. I can't believe the WA would commend that region or that nation. Hard no. No now and forever. Never shall I vote for anything like this. NO. NO. NO. I cannot believe people think Satanism is cool or whatever. First the satan shoes and now this. Society has gone crazy. Long live the Catholic Church.